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 on: May 19, 2018, 02:52:15 
Started by Stillwater - Last post by Nameless
Your clarity was amazing as seen in your thought processes. I wanted your story to go on as I was enjoying it so much. sad

 on: May 18, 2018, 20:34:10 
Started by Stillwater - Last post by Stillwater
May 18, 2018

Hi all!  Not so many dreams lately... maybe I have been a bit stressed by allergies and work.

This dream was pretty vivid though, and I remember it clearly. It is another of these university dreams I have had a lot lately, which seem to be crowding out the common "lost class" Highschool dream that I and a lot of others get.


I am sitting in the studio in Rome finishing up some of our final assignments. The studio is an open floor covered in rows of large desks with occasional aisles cutting across the rows. The desks are littered with work from the following weeks, and the studio is lit by dim evening light. The windows are open and a welcome background breeze is livening things up a bit, and bringing in some damp air from outside. It is a lot like the studio was that year, but the arrangement of everything is a bit different.

Most of the students have left... maybe 20% of people are still around. I have a mind to be gone from here pretty soon as well. I am walking through the aisles, looking over at the work some other people are doing. They glance over at me as I pass, but don't really say anything or express any emotion. It is nearing dinner time, and I am also looking around for someone to go eat with tonight. I ask one of my friends, but she says she is busy. I ask another young lady I know less well, but she is also not interested. I continue looking over some of the work and books people have left out. I see another young lady out at the other side of the room, and I have a funny feeling she has a kind of contempt for me as a person somehow, and always has, but I look at her turned back, and think to myself that I will invite her anyhow, because I don't particularly dislike her. I stand behind her for about 8 seconds, wondering if I really ought to ask her, but I do. She makes some sort of excuse about meeting other friends that is clearly a poorly improvised lie. I resign to just go out alone instead.

I was thinking about getting a rather large meal, since I haven't eaten in about a day or so, but I have no one to really go with tonight, and as I am leaving the building, I pass through a small open-air cafe. I pick out a pre-made salad meal that is neatly packaged, and read out the price, which says 14.69 Euro. This seems quite high to me, but I get it anyhow. I bring it up to the Cashier, who is a bitter sort of old guy who looks like he wants some fun harrassing foreigners, and uses an aggressive Italian dialiect, but my Italian is fairly good this year, so I am able to follow him well. He tells me the price, and I fish around in a small basket for some money. I see I have a 20 Euro note, a room key, and a bank card. That year we also had to purchase some voucher tickets from the university, so they could be assured none of the students would starve, hehe. Since they are the least valuable form of currency we have, and only good for food purchases across the city, we would prioritize spending them first, but oddly I don't see any in my basket when I look. I think to myself, this 20 just barely covers the Salad. What if we had gone out, would I have had enough to cover dinner that night? There would be plenty still left on my bank card, but then what if the bank card didn't work at that establishment?

The cashier completes the exchange, and says something cheeky. I ask if everything is good now, and he says, "No, you haven't taken your change back." I take the change, and walk off.

The rain is coming down gently. I am walking a broad cobblestoned street with sidewalks in the historic district. The buildings are about 4-6 levels tall. The streets are mostly empty of cars, but a few still pass by here or there. There is a great big puddle coming up that covers the sidewalk and part of the street. It is about 150 feet across, and I judge it must be a foot or more deep at its center. A few people are trying to cross it regardless, but I decide I will cross the street to avoid it. I look out to make sure there are no cars coming. There are some, but they are quite far away. As I am crossing, I reflect on how the cars in this city will not stop if they see a pedestrian, but just continue without regard. As I am almost to the other sidewalk, I ask myself if I should be running, since the cars cannot be counted on to stop. I decide I have enough time and don't run.

I think about how I will just wander the city aimlessly through the rain for the next few hours. I think about all the slightly damp places I will see, and the spectacle of it all... the small dramas I will witness. I get caught up in this reverie and it takes me out of the scene, and I sort of fade away.

 on: May 17, 2018, 17:41:51 
Started by Karxx Gxx - Last post by Karxx Gxx
Hello all! Spamming once again  grin

(extra commentary) This whole dancing into yourself thing has REALLY helped me personally a lot. Coupled with other 'techniques' I use during it. Really just listening to my heart the best I can without my head. Anywho, this idea has came up but fell out and been forgotten as most things tend to do. But im glad it came back up. As a rule, I dont write down anything when it comes to things 'I should do'. I will keep on forgetting, switching it up, etc and over time, I will resonate with certain things more so rather than following a technique for a long time just because I liked it in the moment. No doubt most journeys would be 'shorter' if you remembered to do x y z such as laughing first  thing in the morning, or getting connected to your heart center by thinking of things that make you smile and etc. I just felt my brain was tired of methods I 'need to do' rather than finding my own flow.
     Over time I SHOULD come across things I need to do and I trust I will find my way and the universe will find her way to me. So, I was doing the dancing thing (3rd time I did it even though it's a technique I SHOULD be doing more. might actually happen to do this more frequently finally  grin)  and I remembered about dropping my desire in a sense  If you were god and could do anything, I assume you would still want to do even though all if perfectly well. It's a different type of desire.. more so expressing yourself or simply wanting to experience something. Being.
  Anywho, my version of dropping this desire is to be the way I would be if I were (in this case rich and enlightened).
  I wish I could explain the the subtle-ness  of using this as a technique vs not. I may feel more likely to acheive my desire by dropping them in this way, but im not thinking about manifesting it anylonger with my mindin the same way. I guess you could say I simply want to express myself and it just so happens to deal with this process of dropping desire EVEN THOUGH I still want these things to manifest. Kinda like letting go to get what you want. At one point, you just really let go and you might know that this technique works. At the same time you have let go. To actually get to that point .. I mean wow. To realize how to let go(enough)? It's different than I used to imagine how it was.
   The reason why I want to drop my desires is becuase 1. I felt that was the right call. 2. after that call, I realized how much I rely on being different through a state of being which I am not in yet or cant get into at a moments notice. I would say 'Ill be this way / do this thing when im enlightened' (for those who dont know, I was enlightened for a couple of minutes, so I know how I would be 'if i were enlightened' for the most part)
 For example, I know I wouldnt care what people think of me to the extreme. So perhaps when im in the mall one day, listenting to music, I would break out and dance for the entire song. Or perhaps send a loving message to someone. Or hug a friend randomly. "it's too hard to do at the moment so ill just work on becoming enlightened and then ill be able to do the things I want"  Funny statement right?
 I know some people awaken for a moment in some kinda way and want to get back. Why? Simply because it feels good? Because you can do more metaphysical/'supernatural' things? For me, that is the case but also I dont want to deal with the way I am now. Im looking into the future more than focusing on my present. And when focusing in the present I keep remembering how im not really in the present moment as I wish to be and that thinking only makes it more difficult for being in the present too.. Working on being Ok with even that. With being ok with whatever your present is. To be ok with not being ok.. that helps me be ok instantly. Rambling  rolleyes
 Onto the technique!  grin
Really, I can only explain the feeling. A sign(s) to let you know you have let go just a little bit more. It's more complicated than 'dropping the desire to x' because that desire is more than just desire. You have to work on your beleifs first by figuring out what you really believe/feel. Why you want the desire. What would be the differences. What 'problems' would go away.  And after working into that direction, you honestly may drop it knowing you truly want something else. Sometimes you might not truly know why you desire something. But you feel drawn to it for reasons.
  For example, I want to be rich. At first, it was for the obvious reasons. I can buy what I want. Live where I want. Donate to people. NOT WORK! Over time, i worked with all the problems I had revoling around it. One was thinking about how much fun I would have if i were rich. How money would make that so much easier. Now, people have fun without being rich. I just wanted to supply with everyone the things they want therefore they would be happy and having fun with w.e. Like having a big house party like a millionaire. You can see problems with this, and you may think of your own reasons so no need to go further. But 1 KEY reason why is to have fun. Now my beliefs are not aligned with me because the amount of fun I would have being rich vs not is vastly different.  I dont really beleive in that UPON REALIZING that's something you could say i believed in. I operated like that statement were true.  

So what I do is 1. work on all the things surrounding my belief. This is just one part of the belief and there are many invisible ones attached to the desire of wanting to be rich.    NOT WORKING! I had to deal with the feeling of work and all the things it came with. Now working isnt bad at all to me. You can see what I'm getting at.
  Now, who knows why I truly want to be rich. Maybe I have never really found the reason. BUT, even though I keep on working with all the problems/invisible beliefs and such, I still resonate with being rich. The desire is still strong but it's different now. Im not AS attached in the same ego-minded way. Perhaps before you came into this life your goal was to spread information about (insert all things we ever talked about in the pulse  grin and more) and the easiest way to do that is by being rich.
Perhaps I want to show people that you can create any reality you want so ill create what most people want to prove it's possible.
   You see, there might be a reason you resonate with something and that's why it is VERY important to check in how you feel. What gives you joy. Your mind might not ever know why but somewhere, you know
Oh. And to explain on how it feels to let go of something.
You'll know

Peace  grin

 on: May 17, 2018, 10:22:44 
Started by Frank - Last post by Thread Killer
Wow. Frank...Is there an astral memory lane, Selski?

 on: May 16, 2018, 01:18:06 
Started by Nameless - Last post by Nameless
Now I'll move on to your points of interest.

"You state that you became aware of her presence while you were awake? I find that just slightly amazing...please describe that...How did you become aware of her presence? Did your memory somehow alert you to who she was? What did you think and what did you feel? Not to your degree, but I have slightly felt the mental presence of others-you, Szaxx, Lumaza, Lightbeam and some "others"...very faint, but just enough to make me think..."

In 2012 I was suddenly inspired to begin writing creative stories. This is something that many people had told me I should do for as long as I can remember but I never cared. There are a lot of details I am not going into at this point. I played with the idea and posted a few crappy things online not giving it much of a chance because I just didn't see myself as a writer. And then... I don't know what happened. Odd things started happening. I was definitely being guided. So I began just writing what was in my heart. In 2013 I sat at my keyboard late one night just staring at the screen. I want to make clear that I was not asleep, sleepy or meditating. I was just looking at that blank screen and made a statement. (sort of like an after-thought). Okay, if you want me to write it show me. (something like that anyway).

Now I am not going to put that here but I wrote exactly what played out on my screen. I will say she first introduced me to some kids and those are what I wrote about. Only after I had written that did she appear some time later.

I had no idea at that time who she was. She was slightly terrifying, not that she did anything to garner that impression. It was her appearance and her clear commanding air. Well I had asked and this was apparently my answer so I dove in writing fast trying to keep up.

I felt GREAT. I felt confident and terrified at the same time. I was so nervous posting some of those stories but my confidence did grow. What is more important to me though was how she would clearly let me know when I had gone off course.

I can feel you and the trio you mentioned above as well along with a few others. It's so strange to finally come in contact (online at least) with some of the energies I actually know on another level.

You know, it feels good to finally talk about this. There's just so much involved with so many day to day experiences that I and I'm sure WE just don't mention or talk about otherwise with those we are in actual physical contact with on a daily basis.

I think I've covered everything, haha.

One more thing, you ask if the Ebony one is a previous lifetime or splinter. I don't get that feeling but maybe. She seems to be her own separate person in the now despite living in a very quaint (by our standards) style. But timelines are different Otherwhere. The OverSoul(?) certainly has connections with both of us. Hmmm?

 on: May 16, 2018, 00:49:11 
Started by Nameless - Last post by Nameless
So much to think about. Some of the ideas you've posted I've come across before about the soul matrix (past lives, karma, over-souls and now splinters). I haven't drawn any firm conclusions yet probably never will realizing I'll not hold all the pieces at this point.

I feel the same as you as to learning the who and why and whatnot. I know we'll know when it's time to know. But it is entertaining to wrestle with ideas and every once in a while we hit on something and the universe gives us a nod. Snapping turtle <- you just had to plant that image didn't ya? LOL

I think I should probably give Rita's World a read. The splinter idea is like my own thoughts about re-incarnation/past lives and such. And it paints a prettier picture than the example in my head. I picture all of us like plastic. A few plastic items can last a very long time, most just wind up somewhere they were never intended to be and a lot winds up recycled into new and useful items.

"Or maybe, it is an indication that you have actualized and are now at the next level, experiencing from an additional level, slowly beginning to understand how it is experienced from a minor perspective of the Soul/OverSoul level...? (Don't let that go to your head. Lol)"

Haha, that's exciting to think about and it is gratifying if true for me. However even if so I know that would still place me dead center of still being a small fish in someone's pond.

"I guess the fear is loss of identity somewhere within it all. It's funny in that when I am in the Void, I have no problem with letting go and dissolving into nothingness; it is so relaxing and easy(I would take an hour of that over a two week vacation, lol)."

I don't think you should fear this. I've a feeling we NEVER lose who we are. I love the void too, could you imagine the euphoria is you could spend a week in the void. Wow!

I'm going to end this here and add another post. I'd hate to lose everything by making this too long.

 on: May 15, 2018, 14:50:29 
Started by Nameless - Last post by EscapeVelocity
In my experience, the "Who to and why..." doesn't necessarily's simply going through the process and the unfolding awareness that results, is what is being asked of me...that is the is confusing for me and usually takes weeks and months to put any workable answer together, and even that can change over time.

So, in order to dig a bit deeper, I will try and dip a toe in the water and swirl the colors around, hoping a snapping turtle doesn't remove my toe for me...

In your experience, you relate the idea that two beings or aspects may be operating within your awareness. Your description makes me think of a Richard Sutphen book I read some thirty years ago which introduced me to a variety of, and more complicated possibilities of just what the "soul" may be. The Rita's World books that I read last year added to this thought-train.

Early in my life I figured that I was one singular soul, reincarnating through a linear series of lives, with a theory of Karma either thrown in or not. Then the idea of non-linear lifetimes was introduced, even parallel existences; okay, I incorporated that. Then came the idea of an over-arching Oversoul that "my" soul was somehow a part of. That became a bit problematic since I was already dealing with the issue of my present lifetime Ego which really resisted the idea of it's dissolution at death shocked; now I had to contend with the idea of the possible sublimation of my idea beyond the Ego, that of my idea of my Soul being somehow subsumed within a greater Oversoul or a "greater community" of some sort. My actual place within the Multiverse appeared to begin fading at the edges...

Now comes the DeMarco/Rita's World perspective that posits the idea that we are all not souls but actually little experimental combinations of "splinters" of previous successful incarnations, additive personalities and new attempts to complement the experience of the Soul/OverSoul. If we are successful, if we become fully defined/actualized/realized...then we continue, but always as part of a recognized greater being, so to speak. If not, if we utterly fail...then our "splinter" material dissolves back into the soup. The "splinters" are what give us these half remembrances of previous lives, because that is exactly what they are taken from, for whatever the reason they were chosen. The memories are not actually ours, except in an indirect way, but we sometimes tap into them. Genetics also ties into this.

At the same time, the Soul/OverSoul is experiencing multiple, maybe hundreds of lifetimes and with our individual psychic development we can tune into one or more of these either accidentally or by practice. Apparently it seems to be part of our development, as in this case with Nameless. Or maybe, it is an indication that you have actualized and are now at the next level, experiencing from an additional level, slowly beginning to understand how it is experienced from a minor perspective of the Soul/OverSoul level...? (Don't let that go to your head. Lol)

Personally, I have a slight issue with understanding the limits of my personal "being-ness". I do accept that all of Physical Life adheres to a certain framework and hierarchy- Orders and Phyla and Species, etcetera. It makes perfect sense that the Multiverse and the Non-Physical operate similarly, along with the concept that we are all somehow parts of a higher being (God/Source, eventually), and that may include many degrees and orders.

I guess the fear is loss of identity somewhere within it all. It's funny in that when I am in the Void, I have no problem with letting go and dissolving into nothingness; it is so relaxing and easy(I would take an hour of that over a two week vacation, lol).

You wanted thoughts, so there are some... wink

You didn't make a mess of those explained them just fine. I know how, when I go to type out an experience, it is so understandable in my mind, and yet I freeze up over the keyboard, not knowing how to even begin, the language just isn't capable...been there many times.

Okay, so let's drill down on a point of interest that I have...You state that you became aware of her presence while you were awake? I find that just slightly amazing...please describe that...How did you become aware of her presence? Did your memory somehow alert you to who she was? What did you think and what did you feel? Not to your degree, but I have slightly felt the mental presence of others-you, Szaxx, Lumaza, Lightbeam and some "others"...very faint, but just enough to make me think...

I wonder that the "higher one" isn't the Oversoul in your context...just an idea maybe. A Higher Self that shares the two of you? Is the Ebony one a previous/alternate/parallel lifetime...a "splinter"?

I have fully given up on the idea that we are to figure all of this out, in this lifetime. Maybe we are continuously challenged to just take it as far as we can. What fun!


 on: May 15, 2018, 10:36:52 
Started by Sammie - Last post by Xanth
Maybe bluefire phoenix is who they are talking about.
Oh... that Phoenix.
She decided to distance herself from the forum for a while and felt it was best to simply delete her account to do so.
I still talk to her from time to time and she's doing well.  Very busy lady!  In fact, she released a book last year:

 on: May 15, 2018, 02:56:38 
Started by shineling - Last post by baro-san
I believe you don't need such devices in a thought responsive environment. Neither time, nor space, seem to exist over there.

 on: May 15, 2018, 02:30:20 
Started by Nameless - Last post by Nameless
Hi Ev, we do share a lot of similarities and you and I both have a lot of questions. You're so much better at pulling this stuff together than I am. I operate mostly on feeling. Not that I don't have any sense to go with it, lol.

I like your journal title - you should go with that it's awesome. ~v~

You’ve had this experience how many times and how far back?

I came into contact with her in 2013. How many times is difficult to say as sometimes it's me visiting her, sometimes it's her visiting me.

You say she has been “in your head” to elaborate? How did you notice her presence and what thoughts did you take away from it? Why do you think she was there?

In my head is the same as I was in hers in the above exp. Astral Projection/Dream. Only I'm awake and she's projecting.

She seems ancient on some level although her physical self is mature but not old. It's like she has two aspects, one being higher and that one seems to be directing these events. Perhaps trying to form a chain or correspondence of some kind. The Higher being wants me to tell her story but as of yet I don't know her story.

Maybe they are two separate beings. The Higher one began badgering (not really) me to tell stories back then and I think it has led up to me learning to listen/perceive so I can tell this one. Who to and why I don't know.

Looks like I've made a mess of those explanations up there.

We need to be sharing on a deep level. We aren't going to get anywhere as long as people are afraid to face the fear and dig. Hugs and Love right back at Cha.

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