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1  Astral Chat / Welcome to Astral Chat! / Re: Members Pictures on: August 01, 2017, 13:20:51
Thank you! ^_^
Here is a picture of me in full size.
2  Astral Chat / Welcome to Members Introductions! / Re: Riddle on: July 30, 2017, 17:39:19
By the way, guys, I wanted to show you the result of my aura scanning: I got white aura! This is what it looks like. Apparently my stongly charged chakras are 5 & 6 (if I recall correctly) which are the link to the spiritual world, and my least charged one is 1, which is the link with the Earth - that's why I tend to worry so much, I need more contact with this reality, more stability. And I have some sort of thinning around the throat, my immune system needs to get stabilised. Uhm, she said other things as well but I kind of forgot them. Cheesy
3  Astral Chat / Welcome to Astral Chat! / Re: Members Pictures on: July 30, 2017, 16:56:12
Boyana 2

Yeah, basically, that's me.
4  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: July 30, 2017, 16:28:31
P.s. - I don't know. When people describe their experiences, they always tell about peaceful loving souls surrounding them, giving them guidance, about love being the main source beyond. But all I have experienced is negative. I've even dreamt Jesus mocking me once, and they describe him as a super advanced kind soul. ?? When I ask for guidance and protection, I immediately have an experience such as the ones described previously. I still try to hold on, relying on the stories of the others, but now it's been way too much and way too bad, and I'm starting to ask myself some troubling questions. What is with these attacks? Hm..
Besides, having read Szaxx's story of the bad lands and PlasmaAstralProjection's story about Howard Storm, my fear increases drastically... because bad lands do seem to be a real thing...
5  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: July 30, 2017, 16:03:42
There has been a strange sequence of visitations during lucid dreams or sleep paralyses that kind of freak me out. Maybe I have already mentioned something similar but I don't remember.
So, there is always a bad entity (let's call it this way because I have no clue what it actually is) that covers up as a relative of mine. The sleep paralyses proceed with the entity rushing through the door and trying to rape me while in the form of my relative.
In lucid dreams there has been more variety before the attempt of raping. There have been times when I've had entire dialogues that seemed like normal dialogues that I could have with my deceased relatives before they transformed into the raping thing. Once the entity transformed into something that looked very demonic (not saying it's a demon - because I kind of don't believe in them anymore - it just had the exact same appearance) with a mouth like a black hole that sucked in my hands.
It's really frustrating because it kind of scares me that when I die I will face such entities. During some of the dreams my awareness was pretty high so I can definitely imagine stumbling upon such a thing when I pass on.
Once there was my grandfather who looked at me in peace, he was glowing in beautiful light and he suddenly transformed in this thing.
Another time my grandmother was looking at me in a sad and maybe a bit shocked way and then she transformed in such a thing.
There was this time when someone even told me from behind: "Do you notice it's always the same?"
Once someone told me in a sleep paralysis that when I passed on, I would get to know the meaning of all of this. But I don't think it was a spiritual guide, because there was no compassion and warmth in their words, which sounded rather cold and indifferent.
I've had a visitation when two alien-looking creatures ate? my legs and it hurt. It's like they dug a hole with their mouths in my leg and it hurt.
I dreamt someone telling me these were temporary forms that fall apart easily, but I don't know if I understood the message well.
And today I had a lucid dream where I was stuck in my bed and someone made something like an eye surgery to me and told me I suffered from symortosis. When I googled it, nothing appeared.
6  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: April 03, 2017, 17:59:47
There is a continuation with the story about the aliens.
So, I find myself during a very vivid dream in some place that seems like an operating room and I see a dog that suffered burning damage on one of the beds. There are people who are trying to save him but one of his legs bursts into flames and his eyes are decaying. It almost feels like they are not helping him, unlike the first appearance of things, but they have organized it especially so that I could see the grotesque experiment on the dog. Then I find myself before a 'doctor' and I try to explain to him some of the mental problems that I sometimes have but then something touches me on the back and I scream "Pleeease, get it off me!!" It felt like an octopus. Then the dream transforms in a sleep paralysis where yet the same alien that once spoke to me tells me "You have to give it back" I ask "give back what", he answers "Something that isn't yours'' and I wake up.
7  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: March 26, 2017, 11:04:28
Thank you, Lumaza, that's a nice perspective there. I will check out all the topics, they will be very useful to me! I do feel there is the element of teaching in what's happening to me, only I do not completely understand the lesson. Maybe it needs more time before I finally shape out the whole picture...
8  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: March 25, 2017, 10:04:53
I have been questioning myself about this sexual frustration as well but the best I've come up with is that some creatures just like molesting me until they managed to traumatize me with it. It's not that I believe in the Bible, don't get me wrong, I think that most of the writings are out-dated and ridiculous. But since I have seen appearances of creatures that addressed themselves az Michael and Azrael, I thought that they might be real, apart from the bible, and even apart of the term "angels". But I do believe that some creatures may pretend to be them, so my question "Are they real?" came out mostly of despair and pessimistic hope. What I truly believe though, is that some entities like playing around with me, and I wish I could know their names and nature and why are they bothering to bully me so often at night. I mean, I havent been watching scary stories, I try to think more positively yet there is always the same scenario...
No, I don't meditate.
9  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: March 24, 2017, 17:09:18
I also sometimes think it may just be my subconsciousness. It always follows a similar pattern, a rush through the door, imitating my relatives or something I consider scary and finally - hurting me physically by pressing my body. But when I heard the voice telling me "you always do it to her" I started considering that it might be an entity that has access to my fears and intentionally imitates them.
I haven't been watching scary movies for a while! Thing is, scary things have been imprinted in my mind very much and the print seems to have long-term effect on me. I have watched a scary movie for these greys as a child and fear of them never, ever left. Not that I have been scared of them every day, but when this fear arose again it was with the same stength as initially.
By the way, I ALWAYS have bad experiences. I don't remember having one without at least a glimpse of something morbid about it...
10  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: March 24, 2017, 15:38:23
Ookay, so a couple of new occurances have been happening lately. First I was visited by something like aliens. I mean, it was outright aliens, if the case isn't that something else took the shape of aliens especially to scare me. They looked like the greys and came out of the walls like in Silent Hill 4 (it creeps and scares the hell out of me), then another one took me by the foot and started licking it, then another one came through the door and pretended to give me my morning pill. After this sleep paralysis I've spent nights of horror being afraid to fall asleep, hoping that no one would enter my door the next moment. I mean, I've always dreamt of visiting an alien spaceship but still, I don't want visitors just popping up in my room in the middle of the night. XD
And then yesterday it was very interesting. In a first sleep paralysis there was something with a very huge thongue that started licking my hand and it felt like my hand was burning. Then I woke up and after falling asleep again, a Chinese man (I guess the same entity having taken a Chinese form that resembles my ex-boyfriend whom I detest) approached me and started moving his finger on my skin and it made me have this burning sensation again. It was kind of scary. Then I asked him whether Archangel Michael and Azrael were real and he responded me "yes". which may be a lie, as well, though. Then all of a sudden I heard angelic singing in my head and I felt the presence of Michael or someone who pretended to be him. He supposedly chased the creature and said "You always do such things to her". Then the creature pretended to be my mother who wanted to give me a book about Slava Servyukova? And then it pretended to be Azrael leaving my room. This entity has come so often and the style is always the same: always taking the form of my relatives and rushing through the door to scare me, pinching me, mocking me and in general, I wonder why he is always abusing me like that.
Then I were left alone with Michael and we shared a moment in silence then he visualised a tunnel with a sign "Warner Bros productions" because the character from Fantastic Beasts and where to find them reminds me of him, and I felt like I went through this tunnel and I woke up in the room.
It was a very subliminal moment for me. Could it be that Michael is real? But then, why did I have the slight feeling that he didn't really chase the creature, that they were both mocking me? Could it be that he pretended to defend me but in fact they are always playing around with me? Who are they and what do they want from me...? This is not a question for you guys, I know there ain't a way you could know the answer, I am just thinking out loud.
11  Astral Chat / Welcome to Members Introductions! / Re: Riddle on: March 23, 2017, 23:27:49
Thank you for the information! I will definitely check them out, this is priceless.
12  Astral Chat / Welcome to Members Introductions! / Re: Riddle on: March 23, 2017, 18:12:10
Szaxx, as you are someone who has experienced a lot out of your physical body, I will ask you: do you think when you have travelled while being detached from your body you already know what it would feel like after death, or do you think it would be different?
13  Astral Chat / Welcome to Astral Chat! / Re: Is there racists in the astral? on: March 14, 2017, 10:22:08
Why would you stop believing in reincarnation? I am curious to hear your reasons.  I mean, if we managed to get here once, what's the problem to do it another time?
14  Astral Chat / Welcome to Members Introductions! / Re: Riddle on: March 09, 2017, 17:20:04
Okay, since I am not sure whether to ask this question, I will do it here. Have you guys communicated telepathically? What is it exactly like? Can the others read your mind in the non-physical reality? In a sense, if you want to hide a though, would you be able to do it or the other one will automatically read it? Sometimes I feel I would be embarassed if others had access to some unpleasant sides of mine, which I would rather keep to myself.
15  Astral Chat / Welcome to Members Introductions! / Re: Riddle on: March 03, 2017, 16:26:13
I absolutely can't imagine what living without breathing would be! It just seems so suffocating.. have you experienced it during AP? What if you want to imitate breathing for old times sake? Would it be possible ?
16  Astral Chat / Welcome to Members Introductions! / Re: Riddle on: March 03, 2017, 14:29:58
Now I feel more encouraged! By the way, do you think that after death we keep breathing after we have lost the physical need to do so?
17  Astral Chat / Welcome to Members Introductions! / Re: Riddle on: February 28, 2017, 20:52:08
Yeah but  I don't know if you've read the story Szaxx shared but if he hadn't been capable of solving the problem and banishing these entities, who knows were they could have dragged the inhabitants of this place and what they could do. I am kind of in shock now, don't want to meet them in any place, ever. It is exactly creatures of this kind that I am afraid may reach me.
By the way, Szaxx, how come do you know such specifics, what are you by education?
18  Astral Chat / Welcome to Members Introductions! / Re: Riddle on: February 28, 2017, 18:47:55
Oh my God. I can't believe what I just read. :O
19  Astral Chat / Welcome to Members Introductions! / Re: Riddle on: February 27, 2017, 22:03:51
Thank you for the advice! Is there a topic (topics?) in the site where I can read about some stories, experience of your projections?
20  Astral Chat / Welcome to Members Introductions! / Re: Riddle on: February 11, 2017, 22:27:57
I have projected afterwards but it happens through a dream and it's more like lucid dreaming. As for completely aware OBE, I've had vibrations in sleep paralyses, where I've been completely awaken and aware but it seems I don't get technique very well or I am afraid to lose contact with my body in circumstances that are the same as the physical world and not the astral world. So it seems I am afraid to do it unless it's got at least a little bit of the dreamy feeling otherwise my self-preservation instinct makes me desperately want to remain attached to my body. Another thing is, when I have to control it consciously like Monroe did, I feel kind of lost in the instructions,even though I've read so many times how he detached his body with the vibrations technique.
21  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: February 11, 2017, 22:08:55
When entities first started approaching me, my method was to try 'to get to know them'. I was astonished at the idea that there was an otherwordly creature visiting me and that's why I was so interested in them, I treated them like I treat human beings, only they were not from this realm. When time started passing, I noticed that their nature was very sporadic and contradictory so first I thought of it as some sort of treason towards me then at a certain point I asked myself: "What if they are not real, what if they are just symbols?" and in a way it is true that they have always kind of reflected certain situations from my life, and maybe inner conflicts. OR maybe they are real and unpleasant entities I should just not pay attention to, hhahaha. Cheesy
As for Christ, I have felt his presence when I first started occupying myself with these entities, it was just before that fatal Easter when I started hearing the Dama Pika voices, it was as if he wanted to warn me but I said "I choose to try trust these entities"and then it was as if he was some kind of sad (duh) and he withdrew because there was nothing more he could do to protect me because I would still have an unhealthy interest in them (not in Dama Pika, though, in the other ones... but I feel my whole focus was unhealthy).  It was as if he meant to say "you will grow out of it''.
22  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: February 10, 2017, 13:47:58
I am not sure which realm the Elvenking is from. But if he really 'sentenced me to hell', then ... I must have broken a promise. Cheesy
About Jesus, there is a story I can tell. In a dream I saw white soul energy which was supposed to be him. I was in a room that depresed me, surrounded by many artificial mannequins and I would isolate myself in this place that was bad for me. His energy approached me and consumed all that was bad, transforming it into light and healing me in order to help me free myself from the influence of the room. Then he told me to go out and then in the dream I went to a karaoke bar with friends and I felt better.
I am very curious what this "Jesus also stabbed you'' means. Sometimes I feel like he truly exists but on the other hand, he was just a man who supposedly lived 2000 years ago. What if he doesn't even have memory of who he was back then? Cheesy
23  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: February 09, 2017, 14:09:12
About Azrael, I did put a lot of blame on myself, so it may be connected.
Wow that is an interesting story. When you described this kind of peace,  I adopted it for a moment and I did feel it. I have been so serene for a whole year in my life, every day way light and I would marvel at the cosmic without any fear or bad emotions. It's like going to the beach in the summer and becoming one with the water, the waves, the sand. A bit like "Hakuna Matata" from the Lion King. Too bad I've drifted away from it... but sometimes it's difficult to hold it after a trauma.
Where can I read about your astral projections, if you have shared your experience here, of course?
Anyway, from the religions I have always felt the Eastern ones are more enlightened. There is something about the God of the Christians, so personified it seems impossible. And hell seems more like a bad-thoughts-trip in the astral plane. It's just way too outdated, people before couldn't imagine an omnipresence that is not humanlike. To me the omnipresence is either a higer consciousness where enlightened beings have connected in a way undescribable, and probably a higher self of us is still connected there, or is just the whole energy of the universe, and no specific god in general. When I try to imagine what 'going back to the common consciousness' means, it gets a bit difficult for me to fathom it, but somewhere deep inside it resonates in a way beyond words. When I try to feel the Christian god, instead, I feel desolation and sadness. A separate being is automatically escluded as a God, because in the astral we can all create, so, even if more enlightened, it's still not the omnipresence. I think that people who believe so fanatically in the Christian or Muslim god, together create him as an image, so in a way it is a living being in the astral plane. I don't understand its structure completely but I think that people who are fierce believers will end up in a place similar to their expectations. I just wonder whether a more advanced being would pretend to be their God, or it is just a fabricated image leading them as a 'breathing' icon sprouting from their own consciousness. I kind of know what it feels like, because I have believed fiercely in Michael, Azrael and others and at some point it turned out they may not be real but before I got suspicious, they seemed completely alive and real. It is a shock how something that moves and talks may turn out to be unreal.
*still eager to hear about what your friend has to say about the evenking Tongue*/

I will tell a story where Michael comforted me and helped me relax before a test. Before I went to sleep, I was feeling most horrible and stressed. Then in the dream I suddenly entered this atmosphere of relief and I saw his face, with blonde hair and blue eyes. He was smiling. I felt reassured, that everything was okay, that I had his support. Then I saw a test in the place where I had put his icon, "How to treat an angel?" a) burn an angel b)kill an angel c)torture an angel d) love an angel. I said "That's an easy one! And I cicled d). I think this was both a joke because it was so hilariously funny and a lesson because at the time I was treating myself badly. It was probably also a joke connected with an early memory of mine, when I was four and my cousin made something like a radio program recording on a cassette we had, and he asked me "Which ball do you play football with?" a) a ball for football b) a ball for baseball c) a ball for volleyball and I answered wrongly three times! first time I said baseball, second time I said volleyball.. then when there was only the football one left... I said volleyball again! Cheesy *that's what stress did to me haha ~ 4-year-olds-problem*
24  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: February 08, 2017, 13:25:54
If it's not a secret, what do you know about the angels? I am very curious.
It is true that the relationship with the beings I've encountered has been very bipolar, which kind of matches my own reactions towards myself - both love and hatred so in a way the beings 'mirror' the way I've been treating myself. As for spiritual growth, I can say I have been blinded by the self-hatred other people have been directing to me until I finally adopted it. Now I've finally released it and started being more self-loving so I have less bad experiences and I feel way better. Yet sometimes unhealthy visualisations and 'visitations' re-emerge.
Can you describe the way you felt your spiritual awakening?
Another thing that happened to me was, once, I woke up from a dream, and, in something like a paralysis I hear this super amplified devilish voice say "I put a part of your soul in God".
25  Psychic and Paranormal / Welcome to Psychic and Paranormal! / Re: Riddle's story on: February 07, 2017, 14:00:19
So I will talk a little bit more about Azrael.
One next time, in a sleep paralysis I would hear a male voice that was very deep in my ear and would threaten & mock me. I got afraid of it. Then I saw a black robe nearby me and I knew it was Azrael. I begged him to free me from the sleep paralysis and I heard a deep voice "Wake up" and I woke up.
Next time in a sleep paralysis I also got afraid of a black figure and I called for him to come then I felt embraced and I felt his presence behing my back, seeing with nonphysical eyes something like his dimmed face and he reassured me "Calm down, I'm here".
So far so good. But I have been having suspicious episodes with him as well.
Once in a sleep paralysis I tried to hug him but it seemed like he played around with me and wouldn't let me touch him, he would only let me wander around in dismay and he told me "You have no idea what is actually going on''.
Another time he appeared behind my back and hugged me but then I felt he was looking in the other direction as if he was exchaning a mute message with someone. I felt he was emanating  a bit of hostility and was hiding something from me. This won't leave me alone, wondering what it could be that he is holding back.
And then there was this brutal episode where in a sleep paralysis he appeared like the Grim Reaper with a long tongue and started pressing me with it and it hurt soo much. I got super upset and started asking him "hey, why are you doing this to me'', not being able to believe he would do this to me after helping me?? but he would only continue and I felt his derision and then just before releasing me from the sleep paralysis, either he or someone else with a very familiar deep voice said "Also Jesus impaled you''. Now ever since I can't stop wondering about the meaning of this message but it seems like everything that happened to me is a part of a bigger picture and every now and then they would give me a little hint that drives me insane because it just makes me feel more curious.
Then another time he also appeared in a sleep paralysis in his form of the Grim Reaper. First he spirited me away to the street where he appeared in a car but just about I was to enter it, he drove off and it seemed like 'a sign of something' that was important in my life, like, a metaphor. Then I saw him fly in the room and he disappeared. I've NEVER seen a figure more detailed in a sleep paralysis. It was not dimmed, fogged, it was absolutely crystal clear, as if I was wide awake and a person entered the room physically, with all the details a normal person has when they appear in a room. I was absolutely astonished.
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