Struggling. In need of change.

[ArmyOfOne1911]

Hey.

I was just about to try and go to sleep here, but thought I would post this and see if I could maybe get some advice. I have really been struggling lately. Usually I am good at keeping a smile on my face, but right now that's tough. I have come so far that is forsure. I am proud of that. It's just my anxiety has been off the roof lately. My medication isn't really working and if anything, all it is doing is making it harder to go into an OBE, or even just try and meditate. It's so bad I can't look at people when I talk to them. I get hot flashes everytime I have to interact with someone. Sometimes it's not as bad, but lately it's been really hitting me. My Tourettes are worse than they have been in a long time. I will constantly jerk my head around and do facial ticks that really put a stress on my body. Most of the time they give me headaches and I end up having to lye down. :|To make it all worse the girl I am interested in is dating another guy now. It upset me but I will get over that... I guess I am just in this hole, and I need to get out. My schedule is off track. I end up sleeping all day lately, and I can't get any motivation. I am just stressed and lost at the same time. I try to meditate at least once a day, and I also do it before going to sleep. I guess my brain is just wired so differently that I don't seem to be getting any relief from meditating. I used to get alot of EVPS. When I did EVP sessions. I would literally get 3-4 replies by only doing a 5 minute session. Now I do a 20 minute session and don't get anything. I just feel alone. I feel like I am strange everywhere I go, or being watched. (social anxiety) and I have no clue how to get out of this. This forum has helped so much. Right now I feel like the only thing that can help me is to experience the astral, and to keep meditating, and to keep being optimistic about things. I will never give up... It's just frustrating. I feel like I have hit rock bottom, and am not sure how to straighten myself out... I been battling this since I was about seven. It's getting old fast. I will be 21 in March. I was just wondering if any of you had any suggestions on how I could maybe get myself going in the right track again. I have tried contacting my spirit guide many times and I don't get anything. Maybe I do I just don't realize it... Anyway, I am going to at least try and sleep. I really hope everyone is doing well.
-Cody

[scout]

Hi Cody,
I couldn't read and then not respond. My 8 year old also struggles with anxiety. I started taking him to a counselor to talk about it. He was so reluctant to go but after the first session, he said that it felt really good to talk to someone about it. It sounds like you've got a lot on your plate to deal with and if your medicine is not working right then it makes sense that you would be in a funk at the moment. I've read that when things get chaotic or aren't going so well, It could be due to light and dark energy being out of balance. Sometimes you can have too much of either and there are things you can do to bring things back into balance. I hope you are feeling better and flying in the astral soon. 

[rain_88]

He ya Cody,

I have been having some similar feelings since I was 6 or 7. I've just simply never felt that I belong to anywhere, and I've kept wandering what am I doing amongst people who are different from me to an unbearable extent. From time to time I have to realize that even the people who are supposed to really know me simply never saw me.

So in order to being able to take this emotional roller-coaster I've developed my little crafty survival tactics, such as setting goals for myself, no matter how uninterested am I in them. It helps me to hang in there long enough. I hit rock bottom several times, but you know what? Just embrace it. From there, it is a one way road, you will always bounce back  ! And by the way, every time some real change came into my life, it was always preceded by one of this "downs". I guess they are supposed to teach me something.

Seeing a counselor can also be a good thing, it is not like he will have some kind of instant cure-all solution, but sometimes all we need is a fresh voice !

[ArmyOfOne1911]

Thank you both so much.

My old Counselor moved to a different state I believe so I haven't been to a counselor in a while... Maybe I will try again. It never really helped to much but it is good to hear a new voice sometimes. It's been so hard socializing with people. I really wish I could talk to my guide. I can't imagine what him/her/it thinks of me though. I had a meltdown last night and everything went to he**. I am feeling similar tonight. I too hope I get to experience the astral again soon... On a side note, I didn't have any anxiety or touretts, or OCD in the astral. All I remember was me smiling running around, and doing flips in my hall! haha. I was also waving to everybody but it was around the end of the experience and I can't recall much at the end. I have solid memory of me rolling out of body though... Was so awesome. Learning about this has helped so much. This physical universe stuff just sucks. I need to try and learn the beauties of this physical world though. Otherwise (from what I read) I will reincarnate back here, and right now that sounds like nothing but awful.

Thanks for the reply both of you. I will hang in there as always.
-Cody

[Oversoul123]

Hey Cody, I used to suffer from anxiety and mild depression a few years back.  I found that by focusing on the present moment I was able to eliminate both of my conditions almost completely.  It took me a while to get used to focusing on the ‘NOW’ but once I got accustomed to it, it was a piece of cake. 

You can do it! 

[ArmyOfOne1911]

Thanks oversoul!

Feeling a bit better today. I will try focusing in the now a bit more. It's pretty hard... but I bet I can do it too.