What's your biggest weakness?

[Namra]

Not the result of weakness Telos, not that I can tell, but I believe the result of surrounding forces.

Perhaps, you are right, Telos, however, and maybe I am afraid to move forward, or now lack the physical ambition to move forward into the future.  I know that I don't lack the mental ambition.

[Telos]

Oh, shoot, I forgot to point this out. I'm sure now I seem confusing. There's a "strategic" distinction that should be made regarding weaknesses.

Weaknesses are internal. They are in your body, behavior, ability, or your general sphere of influence. When a danger is outside of your sphere of influence, it is a threat.

So, mactombs, the opposite sex would be a threat. A weakness would be not being suave or not having especially good looks or something.

I was also wrong when I said they should be our greatest strength. A strength is also internal. Being suave is a strength. When it is external it's an opportunity. So, a pretty girl smiling at you and sitting alone across the room is an opportunity.

But say you are married to this girl. Then her smile is no longer an opportunity per se but a strength, since she and you are close partners united for the time being.

So, recap. Strengths and Weaknesses are internal while Opportunities and Threats are external.

Analyzing these four together is called a "SWOT analysis" and is another pointless something they teach you in business school. It's semantic. We are already intuitively aware of what things are internal and external, so it's not a "lesson" as much as it is a separation of ideas and a reduction of what you already know. I may have harmed you in telling it. But I thought I'd tell you just in case it helps.

[Heather B.]

My greatest weakness right now is being fixated on the past, desperately trying to avoid turning to the next, blank page in order to start writing a new chapter.  If you've ever dealt with writer's block, you probably know what it feels like... Oh my God, what do I write now?!  Where do I go from here?!  I tend to view living as writing a story... except now I've lost the thread of the plot and don't know what comes next.

Work-wise, I'd say... it's hard for me to get motivated sometimes.  In other words, I'm lazy!

Good luck to all in your relationships.  There's nothing at all wrong with taking it slowly and a bit cautiously.  That's the way mature, rock-solid relationships are built.  I honestly think that so many marriages go wrong, because people rush it.  They try to form a bond with someone else before they even know themselves.  I have learned that evaluating relationships takes a good while, and it takes a balancing act sometimes--between not getting discouraged if things get stormy, and on the other hand, not clinging to a relationship that is sinking fast.  I made the latter mistake once, and it was bad.

But then, Patrick and I were together for almost 2 years, and believe me, things were stormy sometimes.  We had our differences, and we both had our rough edges and sharp corners.  But nothing could ever break us up.  There was a magnetism between us.  And over time, the rough edges and sharp corners began to smooth away as we rubbed off on each other.  We never became the same shape, but we came to fit together better, to become better complements to one another.  There's no doubt in my mind that we would have stayed together for life, even if we both made it to 100!

SWOT analysis, UGH.  Reminds me of my one management class I took in library school... the only class I didn't care for.  I could never be a manager!