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Author Topic: Projection Journal ** Looking for help analyzing/understanding them! **  (Read 1475 times)
GrumpyRabbit
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« on: July 02, 2020, 09:19:00 »

GrumpyRabbit's Very Grumpy Astral Journey

Hello everyone. I started astral projecting about 3 weeks ago -- save for one quasi-accidental incident when I was in high school and somehow managed to lurch myself out of my body. Prior to this, I've been going on shamanic journeys for about 1.5 years, and am currently in a shamanic healer's practicum. Part of my confusion stems from the fact that I thought that, upon fully leaving my body (AP), and asking to be taken to my spirit guides, I would see the guides I was familiar with and had been working with for 18 months! These experiences are entirely different, and since this method/realm are new to me, I'd very much appreciate your thoughts/insights on how to understand and analyze what's happening. I can keep updating this thread as I continue to have more AP experiences. The below is everything I've done so far:


-Beginning of June, started trying to learn more about AP, started doing affirmations, being intentional about it-


6 June 2020

First out of body experience - astral projection - Full Moon was yesterday, 2:12 pm

This morning as I was trying to fall back asleep for a while (as I was very tired, didn’t sleep well last night) I suddenly felt the sensation that either one or both of my legs was “out of my body,” pointing up. That is, my energy/astral legs were detached from my body. I felt the buzzing or vibration all around me. My eyes were closed and this was very exciting! I thought/intended as strongly as I could: “Take me to my spirit guides!” And lo, I actually felt the hands gently start to carry me --whoosh!-- away. I wasn’t scared. The hands carrying me felt kind. My eyes were closed the whole time. Then, I felt that we stopped moving and I was let go of by the hands. These parts are hazy in my memory. My recollection is that I was brought to a series of guides. Each time, I peppered the guide with questions about what my mission is in this life, what my purpose is, what I should be doing, how to best help/heal others, etc. I seem to think that I wasn’t happy with the answers I was getting, either that or I didn’t understand them. So I kept asking to be taken to another one of my spirit guides. After two or three times of this, I tried something else. This time I said, “Take me to a master!” I was taken to what seemed like a room with a large screen on the wall. It seemed like a massive electronic display screen, like of a computer. There was a female voice that came out of it, and it identified itself as my soul. I was given a name of my soul, “Amorphis,” I saw the word written on the “computer screen - and shown an image of a beautiful woman with incredible, thick wavy pure white hair, and violet eyes. Then, as if through a door to the right of the screen, came the human figure representation of this person/my soul. I asked all of my usual questions. What came next was interesting. She said that we first need to see if I’m “in compliance.” (With what?! And, if she was my SOUL, wouldn’t she...already know if I was “in compliance”?) I then lay flat on my back, floating in the room. There was some yellow/white light that started at my feet, and literally “scanned” my body from toe to head. I think the results of the scan were positive - yes, I am in compliance. Then it seemed there was some sort of exercise, as if to see how well I’m able to control my astral body. It looked like a ping pong table. At the other end of it was a little brown mouse. In my right hand I was given what looked like a green, fuzzy tennis ball. I could really feel the tennis ball in my hand, and I remember marveling at how I could still actually have tactile feelings. The little mouse threw what looked like a small black ball, and at first I was confused. Like, How am I supposed to play ping pong when I don’t have a paddle? How do I hit the ball back with this tennis ball? But then it seemed like I got the idea that I was just supposed to see if I could control my astral arms enough to reach out to touch the black ball served my way with the tennis ball I was holding. I had to will/intend/feel to make this happen. It was a little hard, and when my arm was stretched out really far, it was as if I could really feel a strain or tightness in my astral upper arm, like around my bicep. After a couple times of successfully touching the ball, it was as if the ping pong table started floating up into the air, and tilting downwards, so that my end was higher and the end with the mouse was low, like the Titanic sinking. The little brown mouse was sliding down, and about to fall off! I quickly reached out my left arm, and the mouse clawed onto the back of my hand, holding on. I reached out my right hand to cup him and scoop him up. Again, I marveled at how I could actually feel the little fuzzy mouse. I was filled with an overwhelming sense of care and concern for the little mouse. I spoke to him softly that it was OK, I’ve got you, you’re OK. We floated back down to the ground together. The next thing I recall, and this may be jumbled and have occurred at another point, was that I was very excited to be seeing my soul standing before me. I wanted to touch her, hug her. She didn't seem too keen on that idea. Not like she hated me (if it’s my SOUL, seriously), but rather that it didn’t seem like the kind of thing we were supposed to do. She tentatively held out her right hand, and just let me “shake” her hand at the tips of her fingers, just for a second. I was able to speak, it felt like I was really using my voice, but my mouth was incredibly dry, and I was having trouble speaking fully. It felt like there was something lodged in my throat. Behind me appeared a water cooler. It almost seemed like I was in a medical office, or a clinic. I had a little trouble coordinating my astral body to approach the water cooler, get a plastic cup, and fill it. I was able to taste cool water on my lips, but I couldn’t seem to swallow it and quench my parched, very dry throat. There was someone standing right there by the water cooler, a man. I’m not sure if he was some kind of permanent spirit resident, or another projector just passing through, but he said something to me like, “You don’t have to actually drink it.” I responded that I wanted/needed to drink it because my mouth/throat were so dry! I turned back to Amorphis, and said there was something wrong, in my throat. I was very insistent that this was a problem that needed to be fixed. She had me stand against a wall, facing the room. There seemed to be someone with her - like another sort of spirit guide. But I can’t remember clearly what it seemed to be. She said something to the effect of, “If this won’t find it/figure it out, nothing will,” and she held something in her hand that emitted the same kind of white/yellow light, and “scanned” my upper body (head, neck, etc) from my right to my left. It emitted a vertical beam of light. After that, I’m not sure quite what happened, but shortly thereafter I became aware of the sensation of my physical body laying flat on the bed, while I was still projecting. I thought to myself, still in my astral body, that that was really interesting! I could feel my physical body laying on my bed! It was like having a double or split awareness, like two old-fashioned transparency layers, placed on top of each other. Then suddenly, my experience in the astral plane started to dissolve, and I was fully back in my body. And bonk, was my mouth/throat ever dry.

These were the main things I remember. A few other points:

The last time I was carried by the invisible hands (I think), in the series of me asking to see a guide, I opened my eyes to see who or what had carried me, and to express gratitude. I said thank you, and I saw a woman’s back, as she was climbing away, up a cliff face, since she was done, having put me down. She was dressed like an Amazon warrior, her long blond hair in an amazing braid - like the Amazonians in Wonder Woman wore. She was dressed exactly like that. I did not see her face, and she didn’t respond in any way when I said thank you to her.

Some of the previous instances of me having asked for my spirit guides:

One instance, it seemed like I was being shown a movie screen. I was confused as to what the important part of it was, like what am I supposed to notice or pay attention to? It seemed like someone was standing with me, behind me, and at that point pointed with their arm, and we zoomed in to see that there was a woman who was very sad and upset about something. I think she was crying. The “movie” we were seeing was panning, but one minute the woman was fine, and the scene cut to something else, and then we see the woman upset. The movie didn’t actually show what *happened* such that she started to get upset. That seemed to be the important part I was being shown. That this woman is upset. But the “action” of why she was upset happened off-screen/off-camera. As you can see, all this was cryptic, which is probably why I got frustrated and kept asking for different guides!

Another instance seemed as though I was being shown something in parable form. To the best of my recollection, I was being shown the story of how a father or tribe abandoned it’s son/one of its own. It seemed somewhere like Africa. There were what looked like geese flying above, in a certain direction. It seemed like they were called “stone geese.” At first there was the pain and horror of the abandonment. Then, there seemed to be this sense that the entire point of the abandonment was to teach the son/child something. For instance, the point of the abandonment was so that the son/child could learn to find his way back. Learn to read the direction the birds were flying, learn which direction to go to return home. That sort of thing. My astral self seemed to have an immense realization about something about this, a connection was made. I saw myself holding something - it looked like a red metal tin - and standing or sitting in my old den in my home I grew up in, in Florida. The realization seemed to be, “I was abandoned, too.” I’m not entirely sure, but at the time, the realization or connection seemed very clear, and was profound and important, but now of course I don’t quite recall.

I have the sense there was much more that I experienced and was shown, but I don’t remember.


14 June 2020

out of body experience - astral projection

Again, laying in bed in the morning trying to get some more sleep. Twilight in and out. Suddenly felt vibrations, as if “falling into” vibrations, like a switch was flipped. Since I wasn’t out yet, I tried to use the rope pulling technique. Seemed to experience astral noise, clutching hands, etc., ignored it all. When out, asked clearly this time, “Take me to a spirit guide who will answer all my questions verbally in a way that I can understand.” Hoped this would get me past the “interpretive dance” stage, as it were. Long journey, it seemed, being carried. Opened my eyes and seemed to be carried by a massive bird of prey, like a hawk or a falcon. Seemed to see other such birds below us flying in the air. I assumed they were carrying other people. Then, I seemed to have a short little helper person who was taking me to see someone specific. There was what seemed like a small hut/teepee, metal scaffolding covered by what looked like black plastic bags. At first I thought it was a weird creature. I almost ran into it, was chastised by my helper to not approach it myself or too quickly. I apologized, saying I’m trying to control my astral body. It wasn’t a creature, it was the small teepee with a man sitting inside it. This was all kinda weird. I remember my helper being like, “Well, you said VERBALLY so I had to bring you to this guy.” She approached him politely and humbly asked if he would please be willing to speak with me. He said he was too busy! He appeared to me as a muscular man with long hair, in his 60s perhaps, but very fit. Spoke in an Australian accent. Like a beach/surfer dude. Very nice but said too busy to talk to me, gave me a list of things he had to do right then. Turning to leave, it seemed like I saw a long line of people/things waiting to speak to him. So, WTF? Did he just put me off for some reason, but was actually taking questions from others? I felt lost and upset. Again had trouble using my astral voice to speak. Closed my eyes and said, “Take me to a MASTER” who will answer me verbally in a way I can understand, or who will tell me my mission (I can’t remember my exact wording). Felt myself being carried again. Tried licking my lips and swallowing repeatedly to be able to speak better. Then the discomfort became so great and my attempts at trying to fix it so intense that I was back in my body. Or woke up, who knows.

Additional note:

Did see melting hands phenomenon.


23 June 2020

Out of body experience - astral projection

NOTE: Between this morning and the last time written about, I had two additional *brief* possible OBEs. One of which involved me trying the “roll out” method so I could tool around here on earth for a bit. I rolled onto the floor next to my bed. I felt so tired I decided to just fall asleep. Problem was that I thought I was still in my body! I thought to myself, Oh well, at least when I wake up again on the floor I’ll know something weird happened! I woke up in bed, obviously.

Felt/heard vibrations on and off. I remember laying in bed and touching my tongue to my teeth, confirming to myself I was awake and in bed. I think I may have asked for help getting fully out of my body. The first thing I remember is that I felt like my right hand/arm was loose. The vibrations/sound seem to start and stop, so that’s probably why I mentally asked for help to get out. It seemed like I was being helped/lifted out of my body, I felt hands on both sides of me. Lifted up toward the ceiling of my room. It seemed like I could see my ceiling fan. I was afraid I was going to be lifted right into it, even though I knew it wasn’t my physical body, I still didn’t want to be lifted into it. I didn’t really have the chance to think/command where I want to go. Instead, the hands that helped me out of my body seemed to turn my body so instead of laying horizontally on my back, I was vertical. Almost seemed like I was being shoved into my closet, which I didn’t want. Then I felt like I was being pushed directly downwards, like into the apartment of my downstairs neighbor. I was like, well, I guess I’ll see what her apartment looks like. But instead of emerging into her apartment, it was my house in Florida where I grew up. There was a blonde woman sitting on the loveseat, wearing a green shirt. Her hair was in a ponytail. She was very pretty and was a young woman. I asked, Who are you? She said her name was Kimmy. I said, Hey! Just like that show I’m watching! She said she’s here to talk about my schedule for my classes. Then I asked, What are you? Not just who, but what. Like, what kind of entity is she. She didn’t seem to either want to answer that question, or that the information wouldn’t make sense to me. She said a word, but it sounded like a nonsense word. I was also marveling at how I could see what looked like my old house. We went to sit out on the patio. When I was about to take my seat at the table, some weird creature attached itself to my right upper arm/shoulder. It was green, had something resembling a large frog head but had a body more like a slug. I didn’t like it and it didn’t seem like a good thing. I was trying to use the techniques I’ve read about, verbally and forcefully commanding it to leave. Leave me! I banish you! I command you to leave my space! Things like that. I was very upset about the thing on my arm, but the blonde woman didn’t seem concerned. She began to make movements like she was going to start offering me assistance. By this point I was trying to scream the thing away from me as loudly as I could, trying to use my astral voice. I may have actually been making sounds IRL in my physical body, because eventually I woke myself up.


24 June 2020

Out of body experience - astral projection

This morning, I tried to put myself in that “half awake half asleep” state, which seems to be triggering the vibrations. It took awhile, at least an hour or two, to get to that place where the vibrations started. I got out, felt hands on both sides of my body again. I felt happy and reached out with my fingertips and held their hands, one on each side, as they carried me. I asked to see the same woman I saw yesterday, the one who wanted to talk to me about the schedule for my classes. That seemed important! Like, hey, we’re finally getting somewhere, they’re going to teach me stuff! I looked up. It was almost like I was being carried on something like a stretcher - because I was floating flat, horizontally, lower to the ground. We were outside of a building. It was snowing, and I opened my mouth and tasted some of the large snowflakes that were falling. My helpers today were an older white man, who seemed to have a mustache, and a kinda chubby middle aged Asian man. One knocked on the door, and we went inside. It almost seemed like a warehouse or like the back area of a storefront or something. They asked, first, alright, what are all your questions? What do you want to know? Since I’d asked about the schedule for my classes, it seems they wanted to get clear on everything I wanted to know first, as a first step. I said, so many things! I began to list all of my questions, like who am I? Why am I here? What’s my mission in this lifetime? What am I supposed to do? How do I best help people? Is it true that I’ve been a healer in past lives? Is that what I am in this life? What about the shamanism stuff? Was I also a shaman before? Am I one now? It seemed like they interrupted me at one point, and said, OK, let’s start here. Handed me a sheet of paper. One sheet with a lot of paragraphs typed on it. The only word I noticed on it was like halfway down and seemed to be in larger font, like starting a new section, and the word was “Lamb”. They said they were taking me somewhere specific. We were on the back flatbed of a pickup truck, driving through a lovely country/rural area/town. I asked where we were. The Asian guy told me a word that seemed to begin with a “V” but I couldn’t catch/understand it. I asked, but what is that, is it a planet? Didn’t respond. They both seemed amused by all my questions. They said I would see both of them again. I was happy about that. Like, Really?! Because so far I never see anyone more than once! Why is that? Again the amusement with my questions and I don’t think I got a response, or I didn’t understand/don’t remember. I wanted to make sure they heard ALL my questions. So I was like, OK, I just want to make sure you guys KNOW. There were all the questions I was listing before, and I wanted to finish my list of questions. Now I added, What does THIS mean? That I can leave my body? Does this mean anything? Am I to use this type of journey (i.e., astral projection) to also help people, get them information and/or healing? The Asian dude seemed to laugh, and said, “You just went from HERE to THERE” - tapping first with his pointer finger on the right side of my forehead, and then moving it to the left side of my forehead. So: “You just went from HERE” --taps right side of my forehead-- “to THERE” --taps left side of my forehead. I was like, Huh? What do you mean? That’s all I remember. I thought briefly about my physical body and got sucked back in.


29 June 2020

Out of body experiences - astral projection

On the way out, I almost seemed “stuck” in my head, and I asked for help getting totally out. Seemed to feel the hands pull me fully out of my body. I said/thought, You know all my questions, now please take me to get the answers! It seemed like two middle-aged white men carrying me. Wearing suits, hats, seemed a bit “retro” almost. Kinda like businessmen, or something. I said thank you. I felt glad, thinking I would finally get all my questions answered. I seem sent or even thrown down somewhere, a large indoor room, onto a very nice/fancy floor. It seemed like a fancy bar of a hotel or something. There were two bartenders behind the bar, both wearing tuxes. I was on the floor, and appeared to be wearing some sort of silky risque outfit. Black stockings, very short black silky “shorts” that barely covered my butt. I looked up after landing on the floor, and there seemed to be a high “wall” of many people, perhaps all men, looking at me and clapping from their booths/chairs. While I was maneuvering on the floor to get myself standing up, while looking around me at my surroundings, I could feel soreness in my body/limbs, like it hurt when I landed.

I walked up to the bartenders and said, Quickly, who can answer my questions?! I don’t know how much time I’ll have before I get sucked back! They put two drinks on the countertop in front of me. They seemed to say they don’t know who could answer my questions. One of the drinks looked like sparkling mineral water. I asked if it was water or alcoholic. I even thought to myself, Well, if it’s alcohol maybe I can drink it because I’m not in my physical body (since I have alcohol intolerance - I have a chronic illness). Then there was a man sitting at the bar to my left, he said something about me having been drunk when I was there last time. Seemed like he named an event that took place in 1956. I was like, What? Me? Drunk? The bartenders seemed to agree I was drunk at such & such event. I tried opening my “astral” mouth so I could drink the water/or whatever, and voice properly instead of using telepathy (which is what seemed to be happening). It felt like I did, and then, I focused on the sensation of having opened my mouth, and was back in my body with my mouth open.

Second projection, same morning, just a couple hours later

As I was lifting/floating out of my body, my body seemed to pivot (still floating on my back), so that I was facing north. I was going to ask my helping hands again to take me to get my questions answered, but instead, before I could do that - WHOOOOSH! I shot out like from a cannon! I didn’t intend this or try for this, it’s just what happened. This was a fun ride, I was whizzing through what seemed like a tunnel or wormhole or something - up, up, up and out. So fast! It almost seemed like there was a light at the other end, and I actually thought to myself, Is there a train coming?! I turned my back in the direction I was going for a bit, and then I faced forward again, and it’s hard to describe what I saw. It was like I saw a massive black space, but something formed out of light floating within it. Almost like a transparent black orb with red lights around it. Then, there was an opening, the opening was shaped like a star, and it was surrounded by glowing colorful rainbow lights lights. I went through the star-like-shaped opening. I thought to myself I must definitely be entering an astral world, here. I felt glad and happy. It seemed there were people who knew me who were glad I arrived. It appeared like I just landed in some large, massive indoor space, like a convention center or the entrance to an airport. There was even an escalator. I had no idea who the bonk any of them were. I wound up having a lot of trouble controlling my body here, like floating way up when I wanted to go back down to the floor, and my body became incredibly elongated. I was basically Gumby. The people (or whatever they are) helped “compress” my body back for me. They had me floating on my back, and told me to relax and control my breathing. It was like I could actually feel them pushing the “extra leg” length back into my upper legs. I could feel it and it was uncomfortable and weird, but not that bad. But, it seems they compressed me too much, because now I was too short! My head came up to everyone’s waist level, so that was annoying. It seemed like they were standing around a tall table/countertop, starting to celebrate with pizza and soda. I asked, Who can answer all my questions?! Someone was like, Gosh, I don’t know, no one can answer all that here. I was like, WHAT?! No one?! Not a guide or a master or some really wise person?! It seemed like the one I was talking to got an idea of someone I could talk to. I forget or couldn’t understand the name. As everyone was gathered to eat, and me too short, I asked, Do you all know who I am? Then I made the mistake of thinking about worrying about going back to my body. So of course then I was back in my body.


30 June 2020

Out of body experience - astral projection

NOTE: Seemed to have a few brief ones this morning, the one I type below was the last/longest one, although it was also way too short

It felt like I managed to project from inside a dream. I did not feel the helping hands, even when I stated where I wanted them to take me. I felt movement, and I knew I was traveling in a certain direction, but I did not feel hands carrying me. I guess if you project from inside a dream, maybe the hands don’t show up. What I said was, “Take me to someone who will teach me how to heal myself and others.” I have grown tired of not getting straight answers to my questions, so I’m done waiting for explicit guidance. I had been thinking to myself, maybe part of the "lesson" here is that they won't answer my questions because I need to learn to not wait for them to tell me what my mission is, I just need to choose a mission. I have no idea, that's just one hypothesis I have, regarding why they won't just freaking TELL ME, since I'm asking about it quite directly. Anyway, I moved for what seemed like a long time, and I even wondered, why is this taking so long? Are we there yet? I finally arrived at what seemed like the “get on” point for a carnival ride. There was a crowd milling about, like in a long, snaking line, to get on a ride. The little amusement park cars (all linked together) were on my left. In front of me was a Black woman. It almost seemed like she was running the ride, or some sort of authority figure. Not too old, like in her early 30s perhaps. She seemed the one in charge, the one I was supposed to go talk to. I asked her if she knew who I was, like if she understands why I’m there, what I’m looking for. She seemed to interrupt me and told me to look down. I was confused. What was of significance? Water stands on the floor? No idea. Then she told me, You’re covered with it. I said, What, sweat? I couldn’t understand what she was trying to convey to me. I thought I’d failed the first “lesson” already! She almost seemed patiently rolling her eyes at me, like, OK, she’s not getting it… she began leading me through the crowd, we were going somewhere. I don’t know where, because I was suddenly back in my body again.
« Last Edit: July 02, 2020, 09:36:23 by GrumpyRabbit » Logged
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« Reply #1 on: July 02, 2020, 11:07:26 »

every person in the beginning thinks that APs are so black and white, that through our logic we will receive every answer we desire and go to any place we ask. Well, experience shows that this is not the case, but it is realized after a while. If we change our attitude, we will have the most beautiful non-physical experiences when we let go and let the experience take us where we need to be instead of forcing something to happen. We should have goals by all means, but after a while you understand how vast this multiverse is and how small our individualized characters here truly are. We start looking at the bigger picture and expand our perspective way beyond the boundaries and everyday life in the physical. Do you know how many times I have gone out with the single question to see the lottery numbers lol. And I was like "WTH is that. This is not what am asking for". Well, it doesn't work that way. I had the wrong attitude and I am still not a millionaire haha.
It is nobody's job to provide answers to us the way we want to receive them.  We cant blame anyone, not our guides, not God, nobody for not giving answers to us according to our logic of info streaming. The point of being in character is to make REALIZATIONS on our own through experiences. Not to receive the answers of the test, which would be cheating. Through learning, we have to come to conclusion ourselves. Change of attitude and start analyzing our experiences to look for the truths and the answers. They will come to us in a form of thoughts, ideas, emotions. You can definitely ask and I encourage you to do so, but do not expect straight answer. You will be shown things and you have to analyze them. What you have experienced so far, no one else can analyze but you. All of our experiences are tailored specifically for each individual point of consciousness, and what may be true for one, may be false for another.
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« Reply #1 on: July 02, 2020, 11:07:26 »

logoVisit the website of Astral Pulse creator Adrian Cooper.

Home of the best selling book Our Ultimate Reality.

Astral Projection, Metaphysics and many other subjects.

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« Reply #2 on: July 03, 2020, 08:11:58 »

Very interesting! I'm still reading so I can't give my full reaction at the moment, but I love the projection storys here lots to read into.
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« Reply #3 on: July 04, 2020, 01:01:46 »

Very interesting! I'm still reading so I can't give my full reaction at the moment, but I love the projection storys here lots to read into.

Thanks! Will look forward to any thoughts should you have them =)
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« Reply #4 on: July 04, 2020, 01:08:37 »

every person in the beginning thinks that APs are so black and white

I don't think they're black and white! While I certainly may wish they were. Some things I maybe shouldn't have left out, for context - I'm generally a pretty patient person, but I can't help feeling like time is a bit of the essence here. I have a chronic illness that debilitates many. It's actually at the very bottom of the list, out of all the diseases that the NIH keeps track of "quality of life" for - we've overall got the worst quality of life. Some people are very severely sick, chained to their beds, for years. For decades! Unable to live their lives, work, visit family, see friends. Some are unable to tolerate light, sound, or even touch. My heart breaks for them. Suicide is a big risk in my community. People are desperate, suffering, and lose hope. Yet government funding is almost nonexistent for biomedical research, especially relative to disease burden. So that's a big part of why I'm doing this. I want to heal myself, for sure, since everything else I've tried has failed, and Western medicine has no answers. I want to help THEM! The people who have been confined to their beds, looking at the same ceiling fan, for years, day in and day out. I really wish the "powers that be" would just speed up the "learn how to be a healer" process, because every day that ticks by is just another day that they suffer. Other information/teachings/knowledge can wait. I just need/want to help my community.

So, that's why I'm itching to get this show on the road =)
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« Reply #4 on: July 04, 2020, 01:08:37 »



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« Reply #5 on: July 04, 2020, 06:52:02 »

yes, I understand this is very devastating. My biggest dream since I was 5 years old was to heal everyone in the world. I have had two APs where I had asked to receive the gift of healing. They are posted here if you want to read what I was shown when I asked. But even though I try, my healing is not working the way I want to. But I know for sure that every challenge is for a reason, and every soul has agreed to go through these challenges in game like realities for the purpose of learning. Sometimes those we wish to heal subconsciously will reject the healing energy because they have a different agenda. We have discussed this here with Lumaza and others many times. Here are the links to my APs if you would like to compare.

http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_astral_projection_experiences/healing_hands-t47883.0.html;msg373504#msg373504
http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_out_of_body_experiences/receiving_powers-t39193.0.html

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« Reply #6 on: July 04, 2020, 08:55:54 »

 GrumpyRabbit, I know these words won't make sense to you right now and I really wanted to get a conversation going with you on what the Shaman thinks about this. I have worked with healing people for years. Right now my wife, the Love of my life and a very good friend both have "blocked" that healing. In the physical they are fighting tooth and nail to stay alive. I was told though, rather directly, that my wife was in stasis. I was told that a few years back when I saw the signs of her Cancer worsening. For a time, I even found that I wasn't "permitted" to have a OBE/AP, solely because "they" knew that I was going to do everything in my power to help her. She has now had the terminal Cancer going on 6 years now and the Doctors can't figure out why she is still alive. Her form of Cancer is supposed to be very aggressive. When she was diagnosed, they gave her less than a year to live and that was with Chemo. She didn't do the Chemo or any treatments at all. I was told many times, because I am stubborn, that it wasn't my decision to make.

 Who "They" seem to be is another question for another time. I very rarely see a Being. It seems more like a telepathic "knowing".

 Every day I add her and my good friend to my "Healing mantra/modality". When I focus on them, I can't even see or visualize them at all. I have no problem visualizing. That is a strong part of my Phase technique. Yet, I can't visualize either of them. My imagery always gets "hi jacked" to something else. So, what I do now is I summon forth the golden Temple of Healing and invite them inside of it.

 I hear how the Shaman are successful with their healings. But what happens when their Higher Self/Spirit decides against it? How does the Shaman help there? Giving/sending them "strength" is important, but that doesn't necessarily heal the ailment.

 As Lightbeam pointed out, we have discussed this here on the Pulse a few times now. We never came to a conclusions on it, other than the fact that the "Higher Self/Spirit has the last say!  undecided
« Last Edit: July 04, 2020, 09:08:16 by Lumaza » Logged

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« Reply #7 on: July 05, 2020, 03:02:36 »

Lumaza, I'm so sorry to hear about your wife and your friend. On what level do you think they have "blocked" that healing? Do you have any idea of how to help them unblock it? What do you mean by "stasis"?

Part of shamanism is understanding that that shaman is not the one with the healing powers. The shaman is just the conduit. It's the guides that have the ability to heal, and the guides work through the shaman. That's part of why we say that no one can just decide to be or call themselves a shaman. The guides decide when you're ready, and the community will begin to call you a shaman when they see you getting results. Another note (and I want to add that I speak for absolutely no indigenous communities at all!) is the element of trust with the guides, that nothing will be released or brought up that cannot be processed in the session by the client, and always asking the guides for whatever healing the client needs most today. So that's trusting and relying on the wisdom of the guides to direct the shaman to do what is needed in that moment. And it may not be what the client wants most in that moment. For soul retrieval specifically (reclaiming lost soul parts/bits of vital essence for a living client), some "results" may be seen as regaining some aspect of physical health, for sure. Or, it may be something more subtle. Feeling more like oneself, feeling more grounded or centered, colors seeming more vivid, feeling more at peace. It may be that other people, like friends/family, notice a change in you, that you don't even see yourself! It may be an emotional release, memories coming back, feeling the need to release old maladaptive patterns - sort of a mental/emotional or even interpersonal or occupational "spring cleaning." All these things can be signs that some healing has taken place on some level.

I do remember my shamanic teacher saying something at one point that we can send soul parts back to the client, but the client (on some deep level) must accept and integrate that energy back. I will have to ask her more about that tomorrow when I talk to her.

Another thing that you all may already know, is that the way to shamanism is often the path of the "wounded healer" - a spiritual sickness that is so severe that it could be confused with psychosis or the person being closed to death, and the only way to cure oneself is to answer the call to the shamanic path. Many people become healers of all stripes because they themselves were sick, and were hellbent on finding a cure for themselves! So I fit that stereotype for sure. And, I really have tried nearly everything to feel better. You name it I've tried it, but nothing has cured me. I admit that I have wondered myself if there is something on some deep level that is blocked, and I don't know what that could be or how to unblock it. It's very depressing. But, if at least I can manage to find a way to help others, then I will be doing something meaningful.

I remember reading in Robert Bruce's book about how commands and affirmations are much more powerful when they are made when we are out of our bodies. That's what has me hopeful that if I get my astral sealegs, I will be able to unblock any possible blockages that are keeping me sick.

Do any of you know anyone who was sick like me, and nothing helped, and they they learned now to astral project, and finally managed to heal themselves while out of body?

Funnily, in all my adventures so far, if you've read them above, not once have I asked for personal healing! I have only asked about my mission, and then ultimately, to be taught *how* to heal so I can help others. Maybe I just should get on with it and put the question of my own healing to them directly.
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« Reply #8 on: July 05, 2020, 03:13:19 »

Oh, and I mean to add - one thing my teacher did say is that sometimes, for a very sick client, for example, if they die after you do the healing, it may be because the healing was what *allowed* them to finally pass on. For example, you reclaim lost soul parts for them, do a power animal retrieval, and you think that will help them recover and live. But then they die. Perhaps why they were holding on was because they didn't want to die without those soul parts being returned, and getting their power animals back helped give them the strength to let go and pass over. It's a hard thing to think about, that death can be a sign of healing, for us mortals, but something to chew on nevertheless.
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« Reply #9 on: July 05, 2020, 10:14:37 »

Thank you for your reply Grumpy!  smiley You certainly don't seem like a "GrumpyRabbit" to me, lol. If that's a Shamanistic nickname, you will have to tell us the story  behind it!  smiley
Lumaza, I'm so sorry to hear about your wife and your friend. On what level do you think they have "blocked" that healing? Do you have any idea of how to help them unblock it? What do you mean by "stasis"?
Thank you for your kind words! I think it is on the level of their "higher self". I have no idea how to "unblock" this. But as I said, I have ways to work around it. Possibly that's where the lesson was!  undecided The "stasis" that was meant was that she wasn't moving forward or backward. She wasn't healing, but she also wasn't getting any worse either.

Quote
Part of shamanism is understanding that that shaman is not the one with the healing powers. The shaman is just the conduit. It's the guides that have the ability to heal, and the guides work through the shaman. That's part of why we say that no one can just decide to be or call themselves a shaman. The guides decide when you're ready, and the community will begin to call you a shaman when they see you getting results. Another note (and I want to add that I speak for absolutely no indigenous communities at all!) is the element of trust with the guides, that nothing will be released or brought up that cannot be processed in the session by the client, and always asking the guides for whatever healing the client needs most today. So that's trusting and relying on the wisdom of the guides to direct the shaman to do what is needed in that moment. And it may not be what the client wants most in that moment. For soul retrieval specifically (reclaiming lost soul parts/bits of vital essence for a living client), some "results" may be seen as regaining some aspect of physical health, for sure. Or, it may be something more subtle. Feeling more like oneself, feeling more grounded or centered, colors seeming more vivid, feeling more at peace. It may be that other people, like friends/family, notice a change in you, that you don't even see yourself! It may be an emotional release, memories coming back, feeling the need to release old maladaptive patterns - sort of a mental/emotional or even interpersonal or occupational "spring cleaning." All these things can be signs that some healing has taken place on some level.
Unfortunately I didn't find that teaching about the Healer just being a "conduit" until much later in my life. By that time, I had absorbed many people's pain into my own being. I didn't have the discipline or knowledge of a Shaman. No one taught me how to do it.  I just had the ability naturally. I found out years later that my Father did as well. Yet, he saw it as a curse. I saw it as a "blessing".

 Now I realize that I am just the conduit. I realized that about 10 years ago. But by that time, I was the one in need of healing. Like you said, I was the "wounded healer" and still am today. I have learned quite a bit since then. For the longest time I was a practitioner of Magick. Then it all hit me that all of this has to do with the same thing. All of these "disciplines", whether they be Buddhism, etc., all cycle around a focused will and intent. Prayer included. The stronger your intent is the more likely you are to manifest your desired action.

 Here lies the problem. Some people have decided to move on. Some people achieved what they came to do or didn't achieve the goals they set out to before they incarnated into this physical form they now find themselves in. I see people praying all the time for loved ones. But many of those people don't realize the pain and suffering that their loved one is going through, whether that pain is physical, mental or even spiritual. Yet, because the suffering person is part of their life, they don't want to let go. I see that as being "selfish". I know my views aren't accepted by most. But sometimes we need to let go.

 So yes, when I speak about their being some kind of "structure" in the NPR, I do it because this is what many others and myself have seen. Many people have come to this conclusion based on their own NP experiences. In other words, there seems to be do's and don'ts. Once big "don't" is that you don't force anything upon anyone.

 I do understand what you mean though, that healing occurs on all levels. I have seen that as well. Not all of the people I have "healed"/helped" in the past had physical ailments. I have been involved in all kinds of things, Suicides, sudden deaths, spousal abuse, etc.

 Like I said though, I didn't come at it from the mindset or viewpoint of a Shaman. I didn't use "Spirit Guides/Animal Guides" etc,. I just did what came natural to me and I still do that today. In the past I was invited by different interest groups to become a part of them. Most of them were during my time with Magick and I received invites from Groves, Covens, etc. It was just like the study of Magick itself. I always wanted to remain "Eclectic". Yet, with many of these groups it was their way or no way at all. I would read and study what they had to say, but then I would find something that didn't sound or "feel" right to me. When I did, I moved on.

 We had a dog years ago named Boots. Unfortunately she got Lyme disease and suffered from it. There was a time in the winter that Boots went in the woods, the snow was deep, so she couldn't see the barb wire fence. She walked over, got snagged and tore her stomach badly on it. It was a life or death situation. We got her help, but it was still a might not make it to morning moment. I nursed her back to health as any dog lover would. A few years later she was succumbing to the Lyme disease. She went out into the woods to die. I found her and stayed with her there. I put all my intent on healing her and when I closed my eyes I saw in the NP, two dogs encircling her and me. One was a little yippie dog that wouldn't stop yipping. the other was a large dog and he was not happy at all. I knew then and there that I needed to go and let her be alone to die. I did and we buried her the next day. I guess those two NP dogs were her own guides. They knew it was her time to go and weren't going to let me change that, even if I could. So, I have met "Guides" per se. IO don't actively work with them though unless they initiate the contact. The same goes with my own Guides. I know they are there. I speak with them, but haven't necessarily seen them.

Quote
Do any of you know anyone who was sick like me, and nothing helped, and they they learned now to astral project, and finally managed to heal themselves while out of body?
Like I said, you are talking with one now! This is healing to me. Healing is helping others. Helping others is healing!

Quote
Funnily, in all my adventures so far, if you've read them above, not once have I asked for personal healing! I have only asked about my mission, and then ultimately, to be taught *how* to heal so I can help others. Maybe I just should get on with it and put the question of my own healing to them directly.
I think you already have. You came to this Forum. That's a good start!  wink
« Last Edit: July 05, 2020, 11:31:28 by Lumaza » Logged

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« Reply #10 on: July 08, 2020, 06:15:05 »

2 July 2020

This morning, was twilight in and out. It seemed like I had astral sight, or was laying in my bed looking out from my energy body. I could see two people, floating over me, Black woman on the left and I think an older white man on the right. The Black woman was like in her 50s or 60s. She said something like, OK, let’s go. They lifted me up and out of my body. Then, she said something like, Happy Halloween. I then felt like I was floating back down to my bed, and the two figures disappeared. Then my bed started to move as if I were on a raft on a river. I wondered if this was some sort of a test, since I’d just read about this on a forum. To test my fear and my commitment to continue, or perhaps to challenge me to figure out how to get rid of negative, frightening things. First there was a cat that appeared and attacked me, like on my stomach. Then two snakes, one on my left, and another appeared to come at me from above and directly ahead. What seemed to work was saying, You don’t exist! Or, it might have been, You’re not real! I can’t remember which I used, but one of those phrases seemed to make the entity disappear and go away. After those three things, I got this sense that the “test”, if that’s what it was, was over, like I had successfully passed it or something. It felt like I was then en route somewhere else, I’m not sure, because then I was back in my body.

3 July 2020

This morning, after having some trouble getting out and asking for help, I seemed to float up, and felt I was going through my ceiling fan, up thru the roof and outside. Didn’t feel any hands at this point. Decided to open my eyes and look. It seemed like I saw two entities, one on either side of me as I floated on my back. They looked a bit frightening, but I wasn’t afraid. The more I looked, they then morphed into acceptable human form. A younger, heavier blonde woman and what seemed like a middle eastern man. I immediately began talking to them. I asked them who they are, what are their names? I seemed to ask why I’m not getting a lot of answers to my questions - or any answers, for that matter. She said I’d have trouble remembering, or something to that effect. Either I wouldn’t understand or I wouldn’t remember. I’m pretty sure I objected to this! I asked for her name, and to spell it for me so I could try to remember. It seemed like she gave me a card with it written on it. There were a few letters together that didn’t make sense, and then a space, and then three eights. So the second part was 888. I also tried giving her my email address so she could email me! Haha. I wrote it out (poorly) on paper with a pen. Wherever we were, there were strange vibrations in the atmosphere. I had trouble seeing at one point, I tried touching my eyes, and asking if they were even open. I asked for help to see better.  Eventually my vision came back. I also remember her saying something about “fantasy school,” and I asked if that’s where I’d be going or what I’d be attending. There were lots of other people or beings around, and it did seem like some sort of group educational environment. I was beginning to ask about what she and the other person who was my invisible hand helper are - like, what kind of entity - and then I was back in my body.

« Last Edit: July 08, 2020, 06:28:58 by GrumpyRabbit » Logged
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« Reply #11 on: July 08, 2020, 06:27:06 »

Lumaza, thank you for the great exchange! No, it's not a shaman name =) I'm just a rabbit person and grumpy is a joke. Rabbits can be very disapproving, you know.

I did speak to my teacher about people needing to fully accept healing, and she agreed. There are different levels of Self. It's important to know which level has the block, and then you need to talk to that level of the person's Self. E.g., your wife's Integrated Self obviously wants healing. But some other level has a block. The healing you're going to do needs to address the level that has the block/needs the healing. If you send healing to her Integrated Self, it won't work, because that's not the level that's blocked. However you work, be it with guides or not, you can ask, Where's the block? Which level of Self has the block/is rejecting the healing? Ask, Am I even supposed to remove this block? Sometimes the answer is no. But if the answer isn't no, then ask, How do I address that level of Self and what do I do to remove the block and help that level receive healing?

Levels (what she discerned from working with her guides) -

Integrated Self
Physical Body
Emotional Body
Spiritual Body (energy, qi, prana, aura, etc)
Sub-personalities (a personality within the self; a soul part)
Imprints from others (other people's energy you've taken on and integrated)
Group Energy (includes family dynamics, energy of a culture or place)
Spiritual Entities (can happen the problem could be another entity, but this is rare)
Life Force (Source, pure energy; wouldn't be blocked at this level, I think it's impossible, would go against its inherent nature)

It is also possible for the person who seems to have a block to ask the question to each of their own levels of Self - going into a meditation, doing stream of consciousness writing or drawing, doing spontaneous movement/vocalization, etc. Whatever works best for the individual. Ask each level what they have to say about them blocking healing. The people you try to help can do this on their own, and may provide useful information that can guide you in your further healing attempts!
« Last Edit: July 08, 2020, 06:30:12 by GrumpyRabbit » Logged
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« Reply #12 on: July 14, 2020, 00:02:16 »

11 July 2020

Out of body experience - lucid dreaming - possible astral projection

Quite a hodge-podge this morning. I’m not sure if I had a ton of lucid dreams, or managed to project a bit, or a combination of the two. I first seemed to “spin” really fast out of my body, and I asked to be taken wherever I needed to be, to learn what I need to learn right now. I slowly started to float across my room, and before I even was taken out of the confines of my bedroom I was back in my body.

Well. OK, then! Thanks for that enlightening experience. Not sure how to interpret that.

Then, again not sure if this was lucid dreaming or if I’d managed to project, but I asked for healing. This was the first time I directly asked for my physical body to be healed. It seemed like there was a series of experiences. The first one I remember, there seemed to be some male, shadowy figure, on my left. It seemed like something was being “done”, but I can’t remember what. After whatever was “done,” what he said was that there was a tumor in my brain, I think on the left side. He said that it had been there 19 years, but nobody would have been able to see it until now. It’s possible he said it had been there since I was 19, but 19 years ago I was 20, so it’s around that time. I was horrified and scared that there was something serious like a tumor that needed to be addressed, and he left the problem there. In response he said, "If I took it out you would kill yourself."

?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?

During this or another session, I was being shown something representing illness in my body. I could see red, covering almost my entire body. Like as if I was seeing my aura, and red seemed to be interpreted as bad.

At some point, I was so upset about the guy leaving a tumor in my brain, that I asked to be taken to someone else who would heal my body. There was a bevy of weird experiences, including men throwing pencils at me and stabbing me with pens. One of the men was doing this to me because his parents didn’t believe him when he said he loved himself. I yelled up to him that if he stopped throwing the pencils at me, I would tell him how to prove to his parents that he really loves himself. He stopped attacking, and I told him to tell his parents that it’s obvious that he loves himself because he went to medical school.

In another weird experience, I was being bitten by a tiger, on my left forearm. I struggled for a bit, and then I turned to the tiger and said, I’m sorry, I should have respected you. The tiger became nice and asked me, OK, so what should we do? I said, Well, you could stop biting me. And he was like, Oh, right! And let go of my arm.

I then, while waiting for whatever next weird experience would happen, I decided to see if I could just roll-out into my room to try to see the tarot card I left on the shelf again (I wrote about this in another thread).

Anyway, after looking at the two cards and committing what I “saw” to memory, I tried to go to my roommate's cat to heal her (poor little thing isn't doing too well right now). I went through my closed bedroom door, and managed to get outside my roommate’s bedroom door, but was sucked down, and sent somewhere else. I was yelling the whole time, No! I need to heal the cat! I need to heal the cat! It seemed like I approached a very large room with high ceilings, like a medical treatment center. The people in charge seemed to be Asian. One young woman came toward me and asked, "What are you doing here?" She almost seemed annoyed. I said, "I don’t know, I was brought here." She told me to wait, and stay on my side of the line. I looked down, and there was a white line on the floor, which seemed to demarcate those waiting from those already admitted, or being helped or seen. I was handed some sheets of paper, I can’t remember what was on them. I don't know why they keep handing me pieces of paper with words when I obviously can't peruse them LOL. Then I was back in my body.

This *may* have been a place I had been before, this morning, during my hazy Try To Get Healed lucid dream/projection extravaganza. I’m not sure. It SEEMED like she asked what I was doing there because I was back, as in, I’d been there before, but this morning was so hazy I really am not sure at all.


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« Reply #13 on: July 14, 2020, 00:14:21 »

12 July 2020

Out of body experience - astral projection

I think I might have phased in. There was a strong, fast spinning motion, as if my entire bed was spinning. Then I was moving/floating horizontally, but I didn’t feel the hands carrying me. I began to tentatively open my eyes, and it seemed like I was sitting on a moving cart that someone behind me was pushing, and we were moving through a basement or somewhere with a lot of tools and equipment. Like as if Home Depot were in a basement of a building. I think I was startled by all the things that seemed like tools, and probably felt a little scared. I felt an invisible arm wrap around my upper body from behind me, as if keeping me propped up but also making me feel safe. There was a door, and a man opened the door for me and the person pushing me - who turned out to be an adorable elderly Black lady! I wanted to give her a big hug but I just smiled and tried to shut up and not interfere with the process. She went through the door first, then it was my turn. I looked down, and the ground, outside, was like 10 feet below us. The man then was standing outside the door, and helped me down. He reached up with his arms to help me, I crouched down and put my hands on his shoulders, and hopped down. I was smiling, because he was helpful and nice, and I felt happy and taken care of. It seemed like we were at a massive outdoor pool, or a beach - sometimes it seemed like both, the clarity between the two was blurry. As we walked toward it, the guy from the door handed me a kickboard. Seemed the point was probably to show me how to feel water, be in water, etc, I’m guessing. The elderly Black helper got in and seemed to be enjoying floating in a floaty-device and doing laps with her friends. I stood back  by the water’s edge because I wasn’t sure how to swim without a bathing suit! But I looked down to see I was automatically now wearing one, and I got in with my kickboard. I could really FEEL the water, and I remember marveling at how I could feel it. I did a few laps with the kickboard, but I didn’t even have to kick. It was as if the kickboard had an invisible motor on it, and just pulled me along, back and forth, in the water. My helper was going under the water a bit, but I was too nervous and unsure at this stage. I actually was worried that if I did that, my physical body would start correspondingly holding its breath. Soon I was back in my body.

NOTE: before I got in the water, while I was just standing around, I had a weird encounter with two blonde young women. The first one approached me, and I asked, “Do I know you?” I’m not sure what she said. I told her I was at this location for the first time. That I was very new at all this, and that I was still at the level of “trying to keep my eyes open so I can see” - something like that. For some reason she seemed annoyed or way too cool for me. She said something that seemed insulting and rude and walked off. Then from behind me came a much taller blonde woman. I asked what the first woman had said, but she didn’t want to tell me. I remember clearly telling her that I’d really prefer to know. Then the taller woman seemed irritated with me, too! She said we’d met before, and seemed upset that I didn’t remember her. I tried calling after her as she walked away, apologizing, sometimes these experiences are a blur and I don’t remember! Why are folks getting so upset?!
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« Reply #14 on: July 14, 2020, 00:25:33 »

13 July 2020

Out of body experience - astral projection

Not sure on how I got out this time. I think it was based in phasing. A helper seemed to be giving me a piggyback ride. She seemed to know me, and I asked if we’d met before. I think she said, “Something like that.” She called me a sweet pet name, like Cookie Elf or something LOL. While being carried piggy back, we approached the open door to a very large room, with a stage and an audience in attendance. On the wall on the outside if the door was a large horizontal mirror. I looked at myself on our way in. It seemed like me in human form, but my hair was long again, my face was covered in makeup, and I was (again!!?!?!?!) in some kind of risque outfit. This time it seemed like a corset and, something, like I was going to dance/perform on stage. Again the outfit was all black. AGAIN the audience seemed to be all men.

WTF??!?!

I remember that I laughed at myself when I saw myself in the mirror. I am not a dancer, and have no background in dance, and have no idea how to dance, but I was trying to just “go with it” and see what the experience was about, so I even jauntily waved at the audience as I was carried in (still piggy back) into the room. There were lots of other women on stage, it seemed, standing in front of me. I was in the very back, not quite ready to “go on”. There was something wrong with my outfit, like it was too big and falling apart. So, a younger woman took me down some stairs to the basement, theoretically to help me fix it. I remember she seemed annoyed at having to do this, like a teenager. She was hurrying down the stairs a lot faster than me. I remember reaching out and feeling for the banister, following her down. I called after her and asked her for the name of the nice woman who had carried me in. She told me a name, and I exclaimed, That’s my mother’s name! Then the teen seemed to warm up to me, like aw, that’s nice that they share a name. I asked the teen what year it was. She said “1100.” I was like, OK, but 1100 in what time? Like BC or AD? I was trying to figure out, relative to 2020 on earth, in my dimension, where in time are we? What a ridiculous question...BC or AD….ugh! Anyway, I was also thinking at this point, I should be able to make anything happen that I want! So I looked at the dingey hallway in the basement where we were, and I pointed and was like, FLOWERS!! Well, no flowers grew, but it was as if my finger became a laser pointer that painted images of rabbits the hallway wall. Well, OK, that’s a good start I guess. Then, we were in a room with a bunch of other women in the basement. Things began to get blurry at this point, but someone said something about an asteroid destroying a planet, so I freaked out and was like, Which planet?! Which dimension?! When?! Then, these other women seemed to get upset with me, and I began trying to explain that what they said about the asteroid was scary, and me asking for my details was because I was scared, etc. Then things got even more hazy and I remember thinking/saying, Uhoh, I’m having trouble seeing, things seem less real…. Like as if they could help me stay there, but then was back in my body.
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« Reply #15 on: July 16, 2020, 04:47:21 »

GR-
Remember when I wrote that your Etheric/RTZ projections might continue for awhile and you might gradually see a transition to astral/Phasing projections in oh say, six months to a year? In retrospect I should have said six days to six weeks,Lol! My guess is that your Shamanic training has prepared you well for this, that instinctive functioning of the mind kind of thing.

There is a lot in there, these last two projections you just wrote about. I’m not exactly sure where to start except to suggest that you have entered an alternative ‘training program’ to that of the Shamanic program. This program could be described as the Theosophic/Occult version or maybe just the modern Western Civilization Esoteric version. The author Kurt Leland describes it quite well and it appears to closely describe my own journey and several others around this site. With some differences and exceptions noted, it’s basically a training program of continuing experiences/simulations monitored and facilitated by either Visible or invisible guides/teachers/instructors/invisible helpers. You have now felt or seen or even talked to a few of these. Sometimes they are visible but refuse to communicate; sometimes when they do communicate it is just gibberish designed to confuse or distract us.

First, your exits/transitions- It doesn’t matter if it’s a hybrid type exit, a little of the Etheric kind or the less physical Phasing kind. As long as you go with the flow and go somewhere! Just go with what you get!

These experiences can be very metaphorical much of the time. So, I see that you are being ‘carted’ by a guide or ‘piggy-backed’ by a guide to your lesson-destination. This can often mean both to show you that you are not alone, but also that your awareness is being assisted to move to and enter a higher frequency. Nothing wrong with that; the level of help and recognizing the fact of it is incredible in and of itself! We ARE not alone and we have much help available to us. At the end of an experience it is appropriate to say farewell to these guides with a sincere feeling of thanks and appreciation for the assistance they are giving us.

And with that said, they can get somewhat frustrated with us for missing the point of a training session repeatedly, so we really have to pay attention and be aware.

So the very early tests are about simple emotions- Fear, Sexual Arousal, Frustration, Anger...followed by extremes of any of the other emotions. Cognitive confusion is a big one...not understanding the purpose of a simulation, losing the thread...we stop and think what are the causes, what are the possibilities? They don’t reward indecision...one, two seconds, three...you’re done, simulation ended.

In the simulation you were invited to go swimming in the lake. That was a small fear to overcome, but you rationalized the need for a swimsuit instead but either they or you instinctively made the adjustment (nice) and a swimsuit was provided. The women showed up as further distractions but you evaded them and went into the water (again a win). The next purpose was to lose your fear completely, realize that you are NP and submerge without the PR need to breathe. Your mind then rationalized overly that submerging might upset your physical body and the guides lost you.

In the second simulation, you realized you were being carted to the destination (I often show up as one of several passengers on a tour bus). You were put into makeup and a compromising outfit; maybe it was just another way to put you in an uncomfortable position, to place you ‘off balance’ and distract you to see how you reacted instinctively (they do this often in many ways). You later noticed the dingy walls and realized you could perform a NPR ability and create a flower mural in the hallway. That was a curious but significant utilization of your NPR abilities that did not disrupt or violate the integrity of the simulation (flying probably would have brought the sim to an end), so nicely done. I’m not sure why the simulation did end, possibly your emotional demeanor about the asteroid upset things beyond a point of recovery.

So what got all this simulation stuff started? Possibly it was back on July 11 when you made the Intent known ‘ to be taken wherever I need to be, to learn what I need to learn right now.’

So what this demonstrates is a system that is present to teach and guide us, if we choose to participate. Further investigation will show a hierarchy and complexity that transcends our present understanding.

Nice work GR!

EV
« Last Edit: July 16, 2020, 07:18:58 by EscapeVelocity » Logged

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« Reply #16 on: July 18, 2020, 01:22:51 »

My guess is that your Shamanic training has prepared you well for this, that instinctive functioning of the mind kind of thing.

Ha, thanks!

I’m not exactly sure where to start except to suggest that you have entered an alternative ‘training program’ to that of the Shamanic program. This program could be described as the Theosophic/Occult version or maybe just the modern Western Civilization Esoteric version. The author Kurt Leland describes it quite well and it appears to closely describe my own journey and several others around this site. With some differences and exceptions noted, it’s basically a training program of continuing experiences/simulations monitored and facilitated by either Visible or invisible guides/teachers/instructors/invisible helpers.

Is there a book specifically that you'd recommend where he describes this "training program"? I have only read one AP book so far. I'd like to create a good list, but will probably hold off reading anything else for a while, until I have more of my own experiences. I don't want to color my expectations *too* much.

Also, what does it mean that it's a "simulation"? The experiences I started off having, up until that point - what were they? Were they not simulations? Did they have more "reality" than the simulations? Were they not "educational" in some way? I think back to the first one, where at one point it seemed like I was being given the challenge of hand eye coordination. What's the difference between a "simulation" and just...being out somewhere in the astral universe? Do all training programs have the same end goal, at least generally speaking? Different?

So the very early tests are about simple emotions- Fear, Sexual Arousal, Frustration, Anger...followed by extremes of any of the other emotions. Cognitive confusion is a big one...not understanding the purpose of a simulation, losing the thread...we stop and think what are the causes, what are the possibilities? They don’t reward indecision...one, two seconds, three...you’re done, simulation ended.

Yeah I'm right up there with the cognitive confusion bit. I think I've failed that test repeatedly LOL

The women showed up as further distractions but you evaded them and went into the water (again a win).

This may be too "meta" a question, but how do we KNOW they they were there only as a simulated distraction, rather than separate spirit/astral/energy entities in their own right, who were trying to interact with me for some reason of their own? Is it possible to know, one way or the other?


Thanks for your fabulous feedback! I sincerely appreciate it.
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« Reply #17 on: July 18, 2020, 05:42:30 »

Jumping in here on your last question

"This may be too "meta" a question, but how do we KNOW they they were there only as a simulated distraction, rather than separate spirit/astral/energy entities in their own right, who were trying to interact with me for some reason of their own? Is it possible to know, one way or the other?"

Sometimes you WILL know. It will eventually come to you as you become more practiced. You'll notice things like the repetitive actions of a sim (they don't seem quite there). Or the blank/confused glassy eyed stared of someone who is there filling a seat so to speak but not enough aware to really participate. Their purpose might not be to actually distract you but that is what they do just as a by-product of being there. I've found myself trying to communicate with ones like this before realizing they really can't help. So I look for those who appear awake and alert. And look for the watchers. These will be the ones there to observe you and your progress. They can help you to one degree or another.
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« Reply #18 on: July 19, 2020, 10:44:50 »

GR-
There are several authors and many books of theirs that I could recommend but that can all come later; like you said, you don’t want to ‘color your expectations’ too much (front-loading, like I mentioned); you are doing really well with the knowledge you already have, so I don’t want to interfere with that process. With that said, your experiences are evolving at a fairly rapid rate, so that sort of invites some hopefully thoughtful commentary from a few of us which you will ultimately need to decide for yourself what is useful and what should be ignored or put aside for the moment. It can also be a very time-sensitive kind of thing; we may make a comment which makes almost no sense today, but two years from now, it may strike you as an incredible insight. That is the way it happens and we do it for each other all the time. So, we at the Pulse are an eclectic, but incredible, kind of support group (if I don’t mind tooting our little horn, lol).

My personal journey has taken me through many authors and their books across 40plus years. I haven’t read them all, but I will say most of them. Lumaza has different talents, as do Lightbeam and Nameless; we each have our personal way to tap into the Source. Books have been my kind of intuitive, psychic touchstone. I have a talent for finding the good ones, or even the proper phrase within the pages. I lack some other talents or certain psychic skills, but this skill seems to be one of my strengths: Finding the right books, at the right time, for the right understanding, at least for me. We all have our individual talents; part of the answer is in realizing them in whatever form they show and trusting in their unfoldment. Your dreams, your shamanic journeys and now your NPR experiences are showing you and validating your own personal understanding. And yes, it is incomplete but yet it is unfolding. A frustrating and difficult process.

Simulations-
An interesting and quizzical term. A dream, a fantasy, an artificial construct...by whom? You, me or someone else?
It appears to be a format for teaching, for learning. We reach a point where we realize that even within our dreams, we are learning, we are being instructed.  The beauty of it is that any environment can be utilized. If you doubt this possibility, about any of your natural dreams over the course of your previous life, then what was their purpose? There are the ‘clearinghouse’ kind of dreams...but what about the later ones? The dreams that dig into deeper emotional issues?

Simulations are a few steps beyond this; they set up more complex issues that need to be resolved. The question of real versus not real, becomes meaningless. My point is...if it teaches you something of value, then what becomes the question of real versus not real?

(I am finding it impossible to send a link to an appropriate article, so I will wait upon Providence...!)  huh

Let's try again.
http://kurtleland.com/astral-projection-log/2006/99-recognizing-simulations-astral-plane

This is a link to Kurt Leland's website and his Astral Projection Log. There is plenty to read there and decide if you like his writing and perspective on all this. If so, then I could recommend a few books of his.




« Last Edit: July 19, 2020, 23:54:06 by EscapeVelocity » Logged

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« Reply #19 on: July 20, 2020, 02:17:01 »

And look for the watchers. These will be the ones there to observe you and your progress. They can help you to one degree or another.

Great advice, thank you!
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« Reply #20 on: July 20, 2020, 02:21:17 »

So, we at the Pulse are an eclectic, but incredible, kind of support group (if I don’t mind tooting our little horn, lol).

I'm seeing that and am SO GRATEFUL for the help and guidance =)



Let's try again.
http://kurtleland.com/astral-projection-log/2006/99-recognizing-simulations-astral-plane

This is a link to Kurt Leland's website and his Astral Projection Log. There is plenty to read there and decide if you like his writing and perspective on all this. If so, then I could recommend a few books of his.



Thank you! I will read thru this and will pipe up for specific book recommendations when the time comes =)
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« Reply #21 on: July 20, 2020, 04:11:14 »

Let's try again.
http://kurtleland.com/astral-projection-log/2006/99-recognizing-simulations-astral-plane

This is a link to Kurt Leland's website and his Astral Projection Log. There is plenty to read there and decide if you like his writing and perspective on all this. If so, then I could recommend a few books of his.
I don't know if it was Kurt that said it or someone else but whoever it was said that "if you look up, you will see there is no roof/ceiling in a simulation. By looking down, you will see there is no floor either". I have to admit I did that before and my experience began to spiral out of control in vertigo. It was something I would do again, but be very careful while doing it! Yes, some lessons are "painful"!  shocked
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« Reply #22 on: July 21, 2020, 09:40:13 »

20 July 2020

Out of body experience - astral projection

Asked clearly and repeatedly to be taken to my higher self. I wanted to know why all that pain was inflicted on me (discussed in this thread: http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_astral_projection_experiences/is_it_quotnormalquot_to_have_serious_pain_inflicted_on_you-t47938.0.html). Felt the invisible hands again. We moved horizontally for a brief bit, then suddenly straight up. Up, up up, faster and faster straight up. It seemed like I was then in a hallway outside of an office, as if I were going to see an HR specialist. A young white man then called me into his office. He said his name was Jason. He looked about 25, and kinda hipsterish. I was like….This is my higher self? He appeared to not know why I was there. Sort of like, “So, what brings you here?” or "So what can I do for you?" He seemed to be going through a mental checklist of things, running through possible issues, and confirming for himself that all that checked out and was fine. Like he just couldn't think what I could possibly need to talk to him about! Included in this list was when he mused, “....and it’s not time for The Moment.”

Of course I wondered, OoOoooOOOO what’s ThE mOmEnT?!?!

Sounded like something of consequence. But I didn’t want to lose my focus, so I told him that I was there because of what happened to me last time. I experienced great physical pain, it felt like I was being electrocuted. I wanted to know what that was about, why it happened, what purpose it served. He had an outdated TV set on a stand, like the TVs on the black rolling carts that they used to wheel in and out of classrooms to watch something. He turned it on to look at video footage of my out of body experiences. He was going to look for the incident I told him about, when I was hurt. He began skipping around, stopping to look, and skipping around again. On the TV screen I saw footage of myself. I don’t think the footage exactly lined up with the out of body experiences I’ve had, but I think the point was that every move I made was seen, and that I was always under somebody’s watch, as it were, even tho I didn't realize I was being observed so closely. Well, he didn’t seem to find the exact incident I came there to talk about. I asked him, “So, are you a part of me, or are you like a separate spirit guide type of entity?” His replied, “Yes.” I was like….OK it was either one or the other, dude! I also asked him again that his name was Jason, because I didn't want to forget. He said something to the effect of, well, this is a name I'm using. He also asked me at some point (I don’t remember exactly when this happened) he was like, “So….you live in….CITY now?” And I was like, Yes! I’ve been there a while! Then suddenly, we were in a car. He and I were in the backseat, no one in the front. It was a self-driving car and I remember thinking that was pretty cool. It was bright and sunny, out, clear skies. We were going really fast down a hill with lots of curves/switchbacks. The self-driving car was snaking down the road so fast it was like a fun roller coaster. I wanted to talk to him and ask him more questions, but I also wanted to just enjoy the ride down the hill (it almost seemed we were somewhere Mediterranean). I was definitely like, weeeeeeeeee! A few times I looked at my hands, rubbed my hands together, and even looked at and touched my foot to try to ground my focus where I was. But while the car was zipping down the hill, I phased back into my body.
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« Reply #23 on: July 28, 2020, 08:37:59 »

22 July 2020

Out of body experience - lucid dream

I was in some place representing my ex's place. He was moving away, selling his condo. A realtor arrived. The nametag seemed to say “JASO” or something, I remember thinking it was the “Jason” name again. I saw my reflection in a large wall-length mirror. I looked completely like myself, except my hair was very long again, and brown. I remember looking intently at my reflection because I was wondering if I would see something weird like what you guys have mentioned here on this forum. I then noticed that the realtor had no reflection at all. I became curious about who or what he was. I tried excitedly telling him that I was not actually physically there, but rather out of my body. I proved it by sticking my head through a wall. He then stuck his head through the same wall above me. So I was looking up at him, and he was looking down at me. I became even more excited. I began asking him if he were also projecting. If he was a human alive on earth right now also traveling out of body, or if he was a spirit entity. Then, it was like I was looking at a screen of some video footage. People sitting outside. The backs of their chairs said either “projector” or “spirit” on them, to identify what they were. At the very end, a bit separate from everyone else, was him. His chair said, “you.” It seemed this was a way to tell me it was my higher self again. He handed me what seemed like a business card or piece of paper with lots of information on it. I saw the words “Hey, Beautiful” on it, but I couldn’t make out the rest. He seemed to say the phrase “reduction and compression” and he scooped me up and began carrying me away. It seemed clear that we had to leave right then. I got the sense that I had been out of my body too long, and that it would be too hard for me to “download” and save the memories from that experience if I stayed out longer. It would be too much information, so he had to come and get me and haul me back to my body. As he carried me away, I was yelling back to my ex that I don’t know this realtor guy, I’m not with him, and I would come back.

24 July 2020

Out of body experience - astral projection

Once I felt I was in the right state, I willed myself out of my body. I floated up starting with the head, as if rising into a standing position. I thought, “Take me wherever I need to be right now, to learn whatever I need to know right now.” Felt the invisible hands. I was so happy to be out, I expressed profuse gratitude to them. While I was being carried, I looked at my left hand, and thought again how it was funny that it manifested as a normal human hand, when that’s not my ultimate reality. I decided to try if I could think/will it to look like a webbed hand - sort of like the creature from the black lagoon. Don’t know why that was my bright idea. And I did it! Little webs between the fingers. I started laughing, and shook my left hand to revert it back to “normal.” Then, I guess because I was still being carried and wanted to find little ways to amuse myself along the way, I thought to myself, I wonder if I can make myself a point of consciousness with 360 degree vision! I knew this sort of thing was possible from having read about it. Shortly after that, it wasn’t the three of them carrying me anymore. It was just the woman in front, and it was as if I was suspended in the air and might fall, and she was holding me up with only one hand making contact with me, under the small of my back sort of. At first I was grabbing ahold of her to “hold on” so to speak, but she then said something to the effect of, As long as I have even one hand holding you, you won’t fall. So that I could relax, put all my weight on that hand, so to speak, and not worry about falling. If she had contact with any part of my body, my whole body would stay floating. Then, everything became dark, it was as if she dissolved into dark, foggy swirling smoke. I was having a hard time trying to stay focused there. I asked her to keep me there - I figured she must have some way! I didn’t want to go back to my body at all. I’d only just gotten out! She seemed to muse, What’s the phrase…? Like she was trying to remember the phrase that would keep me from returning to my body. I wasn’t sure, especially because nothing’s ever worked for me before, but I tried “HERE NOW!” I thought it as hard as I could, but it didn’t work.

Personally, I think I probably jumped the shark when I decided to leap from "webbed hand" to "single point of consciousness with 360 degree vision" - like, what am I, a wizard!? My hunch is that my thinking that made them abort mission.

27 July 2020

Out of body experience - astral projection

When out of my body, thought the same thing again: Take me where I need to go, teach me what I need to know. We seemed to go through many walls and floors on the way - I kept my mouth shut and just went along with it. At some point I realized we arrived at my childhood home, where I grew up. We went there once before, more early on in these experiences, when the blonde woman said she wanted to talk to me about the “schedule” for my “classes”. Last time we were downstairs. This time I was brought upstairs to my old bedroom. I was excited and said, This is my home!! The woman who was guiding me there said, “This is your second home.” I interpreted that to mean it wasn’t literally my house as it currently is in my hometown, but rather, it’s a manifested “double” of my home, maybe so that I feel safe and it’s familiar to me - so I will literally “feel at home” there. The woman and I sat on my bed, and I tried to ask smart questions that would get me information but would still be “on track”. I asked something to the effect of, How can I best maximize my time here? And, Why am I here? What am I here to learn? That sort of thing. She started responding to me in German! I used to know a little German, and I caught some words here and there, but of course couldn’t really understand. It’s funny because I was just watching Raiders of the Lost Ark last night, so I think that was an influence. I asked her to translate, and she began speaking in English again. And of course wouldn't you know, I CAN’T REMEMBER WHAT SHE SAID! But she seemed to be telling me things about where we were, the layout of the facilities/buildings, etc. My “home double” seemed to be a place for me to go, and I got the sense that it was a part of some larger complex with a purpose, and things just *appeared* to me to take the shape and form of my old home and neighborhood. For example, She wanted me to look out my bedroom window to show me a bunch of children, an area where all the children were. This seemed important. I got clever and “willed” the shade, which was down, all the way up with my thoughts, and gesturing with my hands. Kinda proud of myself for that! We looked out the window across my backyard, and into the neighbor’s adjoining backyard. In the adjoining backyard were all kinds of kids outside playing. I think I asked if they were actual children - like, are these physical children currently alive on earth? I can’t remember what she said, altho I do think she answered me. Again, there was a reason those children were gathered and put there, and a reason she was showing me, but I can’t remember. We went downstairs to the kitchen. A second woman was down there. I asked her, Where are we? She told me a big long strange word that began with an O or a U. Like it was the name of a city or something. I asked her where the city is located, and she said America. I laughed and said, No it’s not! I asked if it was on another planet. And she said something like, Yes, on another planet shaped like America. She was probably just trying to shut me up and I think was getting a little ticked off about all my questions. I apologized to her if I frustrated her and resolved to go back to keeping my mouth shut. She handed me something that looked like a handbook, or guidebook - but shrunken. Like it was a micro-sized handbook. Honey I Shrunk The Handbook or something. It was small in the palm of my hand. I was like...why is this so small? I wondered how I was going to even read it! No idea what was in it. The first woman, who was upstairs with me, came down into the kitchen. As she walked by me, she seemed to pat me kindly on the back. But she didn’t make direct contact with my back, it was as if I had something ON my back, like a backpack, and she patted the backpack and I felt it indirectly on my back through that. Someone had made me spaghetti, which was in a bowl on the kitchen counter. I was also very thirsty. There were plastic cups on another section of the counter. I asked for water. I mean, it was “my house” after all, so of course I should have just gone to the fridge. I found a water pitcher on the counter next to the fridge, so I picked it up with my energy arm. It seemed so heavy, I couldn’t carry it! My arm sank down with it to the floor, as if it weighed 100 pounds. So, I somehow managed to “think” or “will” it to float/be very light, and then managed to successfully carry it over to where the cups were. I poured some water into a cup (sloppily) and started drinking - my mouth was very dry IRL, and that always translates over, either into APs or dreams. After I started trying to drink the water, I was back in my body.
« Last Edit: July 28, 2020, 08:43:27 by GrumpyRabbit » Logged
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« Reply #24 on: August 06, 2020, 05:14:22 »

5 August 2020

Out of body experience - astral projection

This morning, twilight in and out, suddenly felt myself shift into that state. Willed myself out. Thought, Take me wherever I need to go, tell me whatever I need to know. Felt myself rotate in the air and start to float in a direction. I started peeking through an open eye, it seemed like I saw the exteriors of buildings, houses. It seemed like we were outside, right here in where I live. Bright and sunny morning out. Hot. I was in my pajamas, the ones I was actually wearing in bed, and for some reason automatically had my sunhat on - but it was a bit extra floppy, like it was a size too big, and I had to hold the floppy bits up so that it didn’t flop down into my eyes. There was a British woman with red hair, English accent, wearing a sundress. She and I were outside together, walking together, and she was talking. She had one of those sticker name tags on her dress, but instead of a “name” it had roman numerals. Like, as if the roman numerals were her name. I focused on it and tried to memorize them, but couldn’t. She was talking to me about something that seemed health or medical related. It seemed like it had to do with COVID-19. I asked her to repeat what she said, because I wanted to make sure I heard her right, so I could remember it. She seemed annoyed and a bit snooty. Whatever she was talking about, she seemed to be referencing plants. As we walked along the sidewalk outside, there was a lot with a chain link fence around it. At the base of the fence, in the grass on the lot, were all these plants, like growing right up against where the sidewalk was. She was pointing to and talking about two of the plants. Something about how they go together, or affect each other. I wasn’t sure. But it was something about the plants, and I think had to do with COVID, and whatever she was saying, I responded, Ohhhh, personalized medicine! Like, that’s what I interpreted her to be talking about. I’m not sure if I was right or not. We kept walking, and she suddenly said, “Wednesday, you will become your house.”

So, yeah, thanks for clarifying. Today is Wednesday, of course, and this experience happened this morning.

She continued walking, and it seemed like I was suddenly having a hard time keeping up with her. I called out after her to ask her to wait up. But she kept walking, and I felt myself losing focus, slipping away. I was like, No! Wait! I don’t want to go! I want to stay here! I’d just bloody gotten there, and she tells me some cryptic thing about me becoming a house and then saunters off.

Still human. Haven’t turned into a house yet LOL I’m sure it was symbolic for something, just don’t know what, yet.
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