kundalini rising ...?

[pondini]

this is an odd experience that happened to me, but i'm not sure why. prior to the experience i had heard the word 'kundalini' and possibly the expression 'kundalini rising' but i had no idea what it was and i still know very little about it. since then, i've heard a few recounts from others explaining their experiences. i had also seen pictures of the chakras, but that is the entirety of my kundalini knowledge before the fact. honestly, i can't even be sure what happened, or why. that's why i'm posting this.

leading up to this event i had immersed myself into the plausibility of buddhist theory, the survival of consciousness after physical death, and out-of-body experience. it's when i chose to believe in these things strongly and spent much time in contemplation that the 'craziness' started

during this time i was attempting OBEs every night. though i didn't exactly follow the advice of the seasoned OBErs. usually i would try to clear my mind of all but one thought (as some buddhist mediators do) but on this particular night i tried to mix the technique of visualizing a location (an OBE catalyst) while keeping all other thoughts at bay. i figured if i visualized myself moving between three locations -my rooftop, under our corner light post, and the end of my culdesac- i could prevent all other thoughts from creeping in; basically i didn't know what the hell i was doing.
as i felt the verge of unwanted thoughts forming i would quicken the pace, traversing the three locations faster and faster. eventually i was zipping to-and-fro at a frantic speed, when i noticed my feet and calves felt REALLY GOOD! i tried to concentrate on my locations, but the euphoria in my calves was creeping to other leg muscles and i could no longer ignore it. then a thought occurred to me from something i had both heard from marilynne hughes and someone else. they explained how 'beings' had came into their rooms, and residing on each side of their prostrate body, began some sort of healing touch, starting at the feet and moving up their legs.
now please don't think i believe everything i read or hear... to the best of my knowledge i didn't 'buy' these stories when i heard them, but something very peculiar was happening and no other explanations were coming to mind so i was working under that assumption, although i did not feel there were any 'presences' in the room.

so, this sensation is slowly moving up my legs, with each new muscle being switched on fully (it wasn't rising inch by inch, it was more like muscle by muscle -the whole muscle at once). i dropped the chaotic visualizations and simply tried to observe the odd ecstasy in my legs. i was worried it could stop at any moment but it now seemed to be on auto-pilot, with absolutely no complaints from me!

i began to examine just why this felt so good, and it was clear that i could feel this energy within every atom of flesh and bone in my feet and calves. it wasn't like warm sun on my skin or a good massage that gets part of your muscles and deep tissue, it was through and through. even the souls of my feet were euphoric, and i believe if someone were to lightly drag a single finger up the arch of my foot it would have produced an audible response from me! next were my thigh muscles, this is where the intensity began to take on exponential increments. from the start the warm (to curiously-pleasant burning) sensations came in waves, with muted intervals -which enabled bearability and anticipation. if your entire body felt this way, all you'd want to do is roll around in the grass or hug someone, or perhaps some other activity:P

next up -one would assume- would be my Tourmaline/Muladhara chakra, but by the description of that chakra (the base chakra) it doesn't fit with what i experienced at that time; it had to have been the 'Swadhisthana' chakra that is related to the sex centers. at this point i was nolonger considering the 'helpful healing 'beings' theory'.
i won't go into this part too extensively, only providing a few details that might help to decipher the experience.

at the time of this episode i was ensconced in trying to follow the buddhist idea of denouncing vices or attachments. i am paralyzed from the chest down (from an auto accident in 1995) so choosing to reject the act of sex was a breeze, but rejecting the thoughts of it proved to be a challenge. at any rate, once the sensations reached my groin i felt an intense excitement that i hadn't felt since before my auto accident, if ever at all. besides the physical bliss i perceived in areas that i normally can not feel -due to my spinal injury- my mind was flooded with images of the female anatomy. oh, and i also felt androgynous... literally.

i thought i was being tested, much like the choices outlined and presented in 'the tibetan book of the dead'. i felt sure that if i submitted to my desires i would ruin whatever was happening, and it would stop. this went on for some time, but i wouldn't give in.

this sensation, which would repeatedly start at my feet and rise slowly to my groin,  repeated at least 3-4 times before i decided that i had to submit in order to move on. so i MENTALLY gave in to my thoughts -in hope of seeing where this would lead to.
after a relatively short period of graphic imagery and thoughts (yes, i know how that sounds) the rising began to elevate to a spot in my lower abdomen, and whereas my earlier ecstatic sensation might be compared to known feelings, this higher sensation was not! after one or two waves reached my lower abdomen, growing in intensity each time, i felt sure that it might culminate into my 'bursting' in bliss... or some other pivotal event. it was at this time that i reconsidered the notion of those 'healing beings' that marilynn hughes spoke of, and for a moment i considered something might be healing my spinal injury and i began to cry. this is when the strength of the waves began to subside.

i can only imagine a full rising. it would be nothing short of Cosmic, for lack of a better term.

in the week following the experience i would only have to think of it and the warmth would zip up my legs without any effort. it felt great because i could basically fell my legs again after all these years, but for some reason i was fearful, in an unexplainable way, to try repeating the event. in retrospect i feel dejected about that.

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i typed this up a few days ago in hopes i could find a message board that could help me make sense of it. this is one of two boards i chose to join today (as both have diverse sections where i might post a few other events).

thanks for reading, and thanks for any advice or input.

[omcasey]

Pondiri,

I could have written this myself it is so exact to what I've experienced.  You will feel your way through this as all continues to unfold.  Just remember, you cannot get it wrong.  I enjoyed reading your relay and am pleased you have begun sharing your experience..  There are many who need to hear it.  You're doing well.

[pondini]

thanks for the polite reply, omcasey:)

i read some other threads on here (some with posts by you, too) and it sounds like this sort of thing just comes with the territory...? i knew i was immersing myself into a lot of spiritual ideas and thought, but i considered my dedication pretty meager compared to the yogis who go on 20-year retreats! i'm just glad it happened and i hope to experience it again.

if you don't mind, can i ask you...
did you also feel androgynous?
did your rising stop at your lower abdomen?


thanks for your time:)

[omcasey]

Pondini, you are welcome.....

My experience has been ongoing for more than a year now.  Experiences like the one you mention come regularly every night / early morning (not to mention what occurs during the day).  I am not sure that, for myself, I would say I've felt androgynous through any of what has come- I might say non-physical, but I think I understand what you mean.  We all feel and experience these things so uniquely, but there is enough cross-over that it all often still communicates.  To a degree most surely.. 

I will have to inquire more, as to what you mean by stopping at the lower abdomen.  I feel many 'rising' flows through my field, some of which are periodically interrupted, others of which are not.  If you will endeavor to relay more around what occurred with you I will return with as much of a reply as possible.

[pondini]

normally i'm pretty loose and comfortable talking about the handful of events i've experienced, however, the androgynous part, well, it's sort of difficult to comment on the androgynous part without sounding bizarre. the truth is i literally felt like a hermaphrodite. that's all i'm saying about that:P

there's not much more light i can shed on the way in which it stopped. those waves were rising over and over, but only a few (3-6) reached my naval area, maybe slightly below it. now, while the nuances of the sensation in this area slightly mirror those that occurred in my sexual center (bliss) it was different. it was... ah hell, i thought it was going to heal my spine, lol. one thing i didn't add to my post was that even though the majority of the energy was in my abdomen, it was also beginning to reach my heart in a subtle way. that is when i thought i might be healed. that is also when it subsided and stopped.

i am nearly positive that my naval chakra never maxed out, so i guess i just wanted to know what happens next. you don't have to answer if you don't want to:)

thanks.

[omcasey]

Pondini, my apologies in the delay in reply- I'm going to need a minute.......

Some computer difficulties and having to play catch-up.

Will continue with you the moment I can.

[The Present Moment]

Have you tried NEW energy techniques in areas of your body that have no sensation because of the paralysis?

[pondini]

actually, i have tried my own brand of self-healing, which i devised from a few snippets on similar techniques, but it's nothing i stayed consistent with. the notion of revitalizing my legs -or whatever- is intriguing, however, i'm not so concerned with renewed sensation as i am with trying to cure my chronic abdominal pain. it was in that context that i briefly practiced the lessons at the link you posted and they may have worked a bit, i just can't be sure as my pain comes and goes.

i imagine i'll try the technique again when my pain gets bad.

thanks for the info.