Hello, Once More...

[carolstar]

Many years ago, I was a member here. I've long forgotten my old username and password, and as such I've created a new account.

A few years ago, I lost all belief in the divine, transitioning into a very hardline atheist. I stayed that way for a while, and in the last two years my position has softened to the post where I'd consider myself agnostic... or perhaps, just not sure. The reasons for this are many, Most important and convincing is that I've had experiences in my past that I simply cannot explain, unless humans can hallucinate at the drop of a hat (without trying to induce anything). I have found myself very depressed in recent years, and feel bereft at the loss of belief in anything paranormal or divine. And yet, I cannot force myself to believe, because it just doesn't work that way (a concept that I never understood when I was religious, as I though that if you wanted to believe, you simply could). I am trying to figure out where I went wrong, and what is real/true, and what is not.

I once astral projected successfully, and it was a strange (if brief) experience that I have difficulty explaining. I had no body, as if I were just a point of consciousness. I listened into a conversation in the next room, and went back into my body. I remember thinking, when I opened my eyes, "I did it! I astral projected!" I was so absolutely sure of it at the time. But in months and years following, I have doubted the veracity of the experience. Was it a dream? Wishful thinking? I don't know. I want to try again and see.

My one other experience that I have trouble explaining away was an instance of telekinesis (I think). I had been practicing various techniques for months to no avail. One night, I'd been standing in a hallway and I was angry, and I'd imagined myself as some angelic knight with wings (silly, I know, but sometimes that's how I try to deal with my anger--by pretending I'm some great warrior able to make a big difference in the world. I don't actually think I'm anything other than human), and in my mind, that mental image of myself lashed out in fury, wings and arms flaying... To my shock, the trash can about three feet away shuddered loudly and tipped before falling back into place (coinciding exactly with the mental image of myself lashing out in anger, and the trash can was in the direct path of an imagined wing). To be frank, it scared me half to death when it happened. I stared at the trash can, stupefied. There were no pets, no earthquakes, and no one else around that could have tipped the can. I was utterly and completely shocked, and could not shake it for days. To this day, I can't explain it away, unless, as I said earlier, I can hallucinate on the drop of a hat at any given moment.

I feel silly talking about these things, as one who has come to disbelieve in much of it. And yet, I am dissatisfied, and I feel cut off not only from the peace I once had, but also with myself. I was never an expert at these things... These two experiences were the culmination of months of work, and I never was able to repeat anything like it. I wonder now... Maybe I turned my back on something that would have been good for me? Maybe I was afraid. I don't know. It's been a while, now, and with time it's easy to dismiss stuff that once seemed so concrete.

Anyway, I am here to hopefully seek the truth, whatever it may be. If I was able to astral project once, then presumably I should be able to do it again if I put the hard work and time needed into it.

[NoY]

Welcome Back to the Pulse 


:NoY:

[Greytraveller]

Greetings Carolstar and welcome
It's good that you have returned as a member. I empathize that it Is easy to lose confidence in something that cannot be seen or heard everyday. Before I began experiencing OBEs I was much the same as you.
Fortunately this site has many members who Have experienced some amazing things. Most of them, like me, believe that OBEs and astral projection Are real. Hopefully you will once again be able to travel out of body and that will reaffirm your belief that the 'impossible' is indeed possible. 

Sincerely
Grey

[Xanth]

Hi there carolstar!

Welcome to the Astral Pulse.

[Summerlander]

I once astral projected successfully, and it was a strange (if brief) experience that I have difficulty explaining. I had no body, as if I were just a point of consciousness. I listened into a conversation in the next room, and went back into my body. I remember thinking, when I opened my eyes, "I did it! I astral projected!" I was so absolutely sure of it at the time. But in months and years following, I have doubted the veracity of the experience. Was it a dream? Wishful thinking? I don't know. I want to try again and see.

It might have been a Mode 1 OOBE (RTZ projection).

My one other experience that I have trouble explaining away was an instance of telekinesis (I think). I had been practicing various techniques for months to no avail. One night, I'd been standing in a hallway and I was angry, and I'd imagined myself as some angelic knight with wings (silly, I know, but sometimes that's how I try to deal with my anger--by pretending I'm some great warrior able to make a big difference in the world. I don't actually think I'm anything other than human), and in my mind, that mental image of myself lashed out in fury, wings and arms flaying... To my shock, the trash can about three feet away shuddered loudly and tipped before falling back into place (coinciding exactly with the mental image of myself lashing out in anger, and the trash can was in the direct path of an imagined wing). To be frank, it scared me half to death when it happened. I stared at the trash can, stupefied. There were no pets, no earthquakes, and no one else around that could have tipped the can. I was utterly and completely shocked, and could not shake it for days. To this day, I can't explain it away, unless, as I said earlier, I can hallucinate on the drop of a hat at any given moment.

When I was little, in my house in Portugal, we had what many would call "poltergeist activity". At the time my parents would argue a lot and my father used to be physically aggressive. My parents are divorced now. As a teenager, I came across a theory in a scientific magazine explaning the possibility that when there is conflict in a household, mental energy bursts can affect physical objects. Involuntary mind over matter!

Maybe we have this potential within our brains, untapped, and perhaps we will be more adroit at telekinesis, telepathy and precognition down the evolutionary line. Our entelechy could entail this and much more. We may also be able to enter the Phase in the blink of an eye in the distant future - and naturally! - no artificial aids.

As for the religious view...it is only one view which I completely disregard and dislike because it only considers things from an anthropological point of view and makes no attempt at thoroughly explaining reality other than "God created all". I find this lazy and God as an almighty being in the way that he is described and the way in which he behaves is infantile and doesn't resonate with me. We live in a scientific age. It's time to leave the "God created all" explanation as it is rooted in ignorance in my opinion. Things evolve, there's trial and error, there is order and entropy. I personally think you didn't miss out on anything by turning your back to it.

Finally, OOBEs are a real phenomenon. What they are is currently elusive and very much tied to consciousness. Still, I don't think there is anything paranormal or divine at work here. Reality is natural and just too complex for our limited minds to comprehend at the moment. It's this complexity that gives rise to mystical and magical notions.

"Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know."
-Michel Eyquem De Montaigne

The conventional view serves to protect us from the painful job of thinking.
- J. K. Galbraith

[Lightning]

Welcome back, carolstar 

I also returned to the forum one month ago, after my first couple of OBEs. I had many more in the following days, and now I could project every morning if I wanted to. I got better at it with practice. There are some useful guides in the forum, I recommend these two:

http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_out_of_body_experiences/how_to_have_an_out_of_body_experience_composed_by_summerlander-t34339.0.html

http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_astral_consciousness/the_steps_to_success_in_your_first_projections-t33998.0.html

This existence is full of mysteries. The nature of OBEs is one of them. The nature of consciousness itself, is another. I consume a lot of spiritual material, but I'm completely OK with the theory that states "life is only this present moment, the brain is responsible for every single thing we consider spiritual/paranomal/supernatural, and there is nothing else after you die." Why? Because I'm not afraid of anything, and that includes death. I'm also not afraid to accept that there could be a Heaven and Hell, or even many types of realms and possible outcomes for consciousness, if it does persist after our physical body is dead.

The important thing is that we keep looking with an impartial disposition to experience the truth for ourselves.