My path to AP; a journal along the way

[ShaMagus]

Hi all!
Im in the beginning of discovering AP and want to document my practice here, so thati can get some advice along the way. I also want to start documenting my experiences Like David Warner Does in the thread :
Why, Can't I Project? - InvisibleLight Book Reference - For Beginner to Advance
I realize i have to give this all i got, but with ease and softness, to make this work. Guess my taiji training will come in handy! Will appreciate suggestions on parameters to document as all of this is pretty new to me. Will use the ones David has used for his documentatio, but maybe there also are others i need to take into consideration.

So, without further ado, here is my third day of trying to project:
I wake up at 6:45 to do some meditation. I read some threads in the forums to get into the mood. I lay down on my back in bed and start to relax my body. I start with my feet and end at the top of my head. When i feel relaxed, i turn my awareness to my breath. When thoughts are coming, i recognise them and let go of them. Without judgment. After some time i remember an advice about focusing on an object. I have been given an image of a pearl on a velvet cushion that is a strong symbol for me and i start to hold my awareness on it. I find it hard to keep the i image in my mind and my mind starts to wander. I try changing the image with one of my dream teachers, The Moon and i feel calmer at once. When i regain my calm, i automatically switch back to the breath.

After some minutes i reach what i think is focus 10. I feel very calm and present. No thoughts in my mind. I feel a sensation of expanding. I feel expectation is trying to do something, but i just let go and floatin the darkness. I notice small tingling sensations now and then. After some time i get a sense of light in my vision and places on my body starts to itch. I also snore a bit in this stage, but my mind is fully awake. When not scratching i feel i go deeper into the state. I feel there is some sound coming from far away. I focus on relaxing and not to expect anything. When it feels like its about to happen something, my body jolts from several twitches in my stomach and i feel the practice has come to an end. And i let that go as well.

What im left with i feel is valuable experience to build upon. Like, i think for me its easier just to focus on my breath and relaxing than to hold an image in my mind. I know fromprevious experience that im good with visualization, but not for a prolonged time. Maybe iwill get better, but for the time being i stick with my breath. I also feel im doing a little progress each time. I can see that expectation is the big obstacle right now. I want this and have so for many years. Feel now ive reached a level of maturity and ready to dedicate myself.

Serenity NOW!

[ShaMagus]

Sunday November 27

Got to bed at 1:30am and got up at 6:30 to practice. After waking, i started reading School Out-Of-Body Travel by Michael Raduga. I read the first chapter and as always when reading a new book with new techniques, I want to try them out. In this book it is said thatmany people have success after 3 attempts. These aretempting arguments for a newb like me. So, I dont know how productove it is to fill up my mind with all these techniques. I think its better to go all in with just one or two of these techniques and really get into them. On the other hand, it may be a good idea to try some out first and see which ones seem to fit my person and go from there. Think I go with that option for now.

OBE attempt
After reading Contenteos post yesterday, I wanted to try out visualization/daydreaming as a means to phase. I went to bed and started putting my attention on my breath. Ive been practicing meditation on and off for many years now and it gets easier and easier to turn off the internal chatter. When i reach the state where i just am, i can also feel a shift in consciousness. Its like i snap into place. Its the sensation of going to sleep, but snap back and things are just clear, calm and soft. From that point i start to daydream. But now it gets tricky. I start to think and you all know what happens then. I start to wonder if this is the point where i should start to daydream, am i ready, what to daydream about etc. I can see that more preparation is needed. To be insecure about how to progress leaves the mind open to speculation and I dont want that.

So, I needed to calm my mind again and I managed. I started to drift into daydreaming. Just waiting for an image to drift into. At first I saw in first person, but switched to third person after a while. These were all conscious acts, but after some time i could just sit back and be part of what was going on. Seems like inthe beginning i need to program my mind and after I can just relax into it. I was daydreaming about juggling with my firesticks, cross country skiing, being with my girlfriend, running through the forest etc. At some point I would always 'loose' consciousness and snap back. I believe that is the disconnectedness Contenteo is writing about. After some attempts at this, I just become so tired and cant continue and drift of to sleep. I dont know if I felt some milestones or not, since My whole attention was on the daydream.

Lessons learned
First of all, I see that I can visualize and feel the disconnectedness. What I need to do further with this technique is to keep at it diligently and dont give up. Maybe i was close, maybe not. Also, I need to read up and be sure I know what to do, so I dont become insecure. Insecurity is an opener for the thoughts and they bring me back to waking consciousness.

[ShaMagus]

Monday November 28
Wanted to try out Michael Radugas method this night. Ive decided to try it out for 14 days and see if i get any results. That means I will be trying to get an OBE several times the days Im trying, since its possible to use the technique after daytime naps as well. I will give a short description of the technique for those who are not familiar with it. You get up from bed after 6 hours of sleep. Do some stuff and get back to bed after 3-50 minutes. Re-read the technique and set an intention to separate or phase upon wakening. Now focus your attention on what Raduga calls Cycling Techniques, which are separation techniques used for 3-5 seconds and then you change it with another. You should alternate between 2-3 techniques. E.g. i have chosen three such techniques, the swimming technique which is to, ah, swim, imaging which is to look at your closed eyelids to see if images arises and rub the hands  technique which is to rub your hands close to your face. So, now you will wake up every now and then. When u wake up, lay still and separate. If that doesnt happen between 3-5 seconds, switch to the cycling technique. Give them 3-5 seconds each and fhange if they dont work.when u have gone through the three techniques, start over with the first cycling technique. Do this four times. If it doesnt work after four times, go back to sleep and wait for another awakening, where you do the whole process again. Will post what happens.

OBE Attempt
Got to bed at 11:30 pm and got up at 4:00 am. Re-read the technique and went to sleep with the intention to separate and phase upon awakening. I also set some intentions for the OBE which were: to look at myself in the mirror, to meet my grandfather, to get healing for my illness and travel to sirius. I chose a few just in case i ran out what can i say, im an optimist! When i wake up i focus on letting go and to separate. Nothing happens. I switch to my cycling techniques. Nothing happens. So i go back to sleep again. To make a ng story short, nothing happens the whole night. I didnt have any sensation what so ever. This could be a good thing, since it tells me im really focused on my cpnsciousness and not my body. I will stick it out these 14 days as ive told myself. Will keep posting.