How to deal with guilt and shame?

[666]

Hello, I am here seaking help, advice, and guidance.

One major goal in my life is to achieve astral projection.  I've been able to obtain sleep paralysis on a regular basis and seemed to have conquered most of my fears regarding physical pain.

I feel what is holding me back is the fear of dealing with spirits who know the real me.  You see, through out my life I've done some terrible things.  Masturbating to the thoughts of people who I shouldn't be thinking of.  Animal cruelty for pleasure and stimulation. Theft from old helpless people.  The list goes on....  The problem is I have always got away with everything.  Nobody in the physical world knows the real me.  

Does anyone have any thoughts on this that would ease my mind?  How do you deal with the guilt in your life?  

Thanks a lot!

modify: oh yeah, I was also wondering could I have scared off my "spirit guides"?  Sometimes I get the feeling that they may be thinking, "why the heck should I help out this hooligan"?  I guess what i'm trying to ask is, do spirit guides ditch you if you are a terrible person who does bad things(like torture people for your own pleasure)?

[Pauli2]

I am under the impression that it's not so easy to get your guides to step out, they tend to hide. They also seem to know all your thoughts, and they usually don't judge you in this life.

[blis]

In short you need to stop doing the thing you feel guilt about and then process the guilt.

The fact that you feel shame and guilt suggests that deep down you dont really want to be doing this stuff. So the desire to is just coming from your mind associating it with the physical pleasure of getting off on it. The longer you go without doing these things the less you'll be tempted to because your mind wont have the pleasure to associate with them it will only have the unpleasant sensation of shame.

Once the association with pleasure is gone(it will probably take a while) you can work on developing compassion. You do this by meditating on suffering. Put yourself in a medatative state and bring to mind suffering of others. Pick something that you cant help but empathise with and that makes you feel their pain. Hold this feeling of compassion for as long as you can. If you start to lose it, bring back to mind the thought of suffering.

Eventually you're going to want to medatate on the things you've done. Feel the guilt and feel the shame. Wallow in them for a bit. These are strong emotions that you've probably been repressing a bit. To proccess them you need to fully experience them.

Meditate on why you started doing these things. To disassociate yourself from your actions you need to understand what led you to them, that it's not just because you're a bad person.

Once you've stopped the behaviour, processed the emotions and understand how the behaviour came about in the first place you can let go of the old you and begin to mould your character into one you can proud of.

You might also want to do some things to atone for your misdeeds. Maybe volunteer at an animal rescue centre. It might have an effect on your subconscious.

I dont profess to be an expert in these thing or anything but it's how I've gone about dealing with guilt.

[personalreality]

you need to forgive yourself.

i have been where you are and forgiveness is the only option really.

but one moment of forgiveness (real forgiveness) can heal a lifetime of pain.

it may be tough at first, but you need to recognize that even if you have wronged people, you are not worthless. 

you are worth forgiveness.

[Tiny]

accepting the inner devil, atleast thats what i have come to.  

Think graceful when you feel happy, think dark when you feel like it and don't look back. Enjoy vengeance when it is yours!


I've had thoughts the kind you mentioned as a kid and they came and went.



kind regards,

Paul