The Astral Pulse

Astral Chat => Welcome to Astral Chat! => Topic started by: Nay on March 16, 2004, 14:05:43

Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Nay on March 16, 2004, 14:05:43
At first I thought this was a joke [:P]  But you're serious aren't you?

Why can't I guy just be himself, instead of acting like something he isn't?  Eventually his true self is going to come through, especially when he gets tired of playing a role..[;)] and then what will he be left with?  a ticked off girl that's what! [:D]

Nay [^]
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Akensai on March 16, 2004, 14:11:55
I really want to hear an opinion of a woman about this, this should be interesting. [:D]

[EDIT: Ah nay already posted, so I was not wrong in thinking this was ridiculous advice? I thought so, but a man should never presume he knows the ladies, so you never know it could have been true [;)]]
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kerrblur on March 16, 2004, 14:13:11
I'm a [:P] kinda guy, and if a woman dont like it, they can kiss this [?].   I know What I like, lol and most of my friends and I have lots, and the girl end, well, a good girl-friend of mine told me, I have the looks, but when I talk, I'm down graded to the girls-status of 'Good guy friend'.  I dont really try, but if a girl likes me for who I am then they will.  I aint going to be cocky funny, i like the [:P] funny lol.  Noone can change it.  If I tried, I'd just be showing a front, and be Fake.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kerrblur on March 16, 2004, 14:21:45
haha You, me, and Nay all posted within 3 minutes of eachother hah
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on March 16, 2004, 14:44:38
ahaha, it seems that all the conversations about sex and love atract people: 3 posts in less than 3 minutes.

Nay: I dont expect to a men act in a different way, but at least a wussy guy would have more chances to get a woman by acting in a different way.

Besides that, acting funny and self confident it is more like a life style, and for better. The rest it is just seduction.

Do i believe in that? well....at least i used the technique and it works better than giving flowers. If i act like a wussy (and many times i did that) i just receive a laugh in my face: "You?! In love with me?!...Aahaha". Now, if i act (and you must do it well) i a cock(what the hell means cocky? i dont find it in the dictionary but this is the word used by the author) funy style i can guarantee that i have much more sucess. Besides that i will not stop from being myself as Nay say because my objective in such seductions it is to "play", "date" or have a "nice" night with the girl (and she knows that).

BTW: i am not serious Nay and i am not joking too, i just like to crate confusion and make people discuss about sensible ideas. Just look to my posts about obes and proofs....do i believe in obes or not? What about this (seduction)? Well...i believe in nothing but i have my mind opened and prepared to believe in everything.

PS: Nay: Do you wanna date with me[;)]? lol, just kiding!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Vicky on March 16, 2004, 14:50:58
Ok, here is my answer :) I think this is very true that women prefer very confident men. I myself got married for a one [:I] who used to captivate all of my friends hearts. He in my opinion is perfect - self confident. He doesn't say (usually) Where do you want to go? but says: I will take you somewhere. insetad. So, yes, the too romantic men are a bit boring  and irritating. But that doesn't mean a guy should not be romantic. He just has to know the limit. My brother used to have a girlfrined who he would do everything for and she took him for granted and felt maybe even too good about herslef. So she broke up with him and then he started ignoring her and really not caring about her anymore and then she "realised" how much she loved him[?] She started chasing him literally. The more he would ignore her the more she would be after him offering him to go out bliah bliah. So, that was my opinion [:I] I do think that a man has to be good in first place, respectful and confident :)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Jenadots on March 16, 2004, 17:04:03
I have always preferred the "alpha male", but not in a brutish or nasty style.  

There is nothing wrong with being romantic with a woman.  Just simply say: "I have planned a romantic evening for us"  and give her a clue as to what to wear.  

I would also recommend some manners -- since common courtesy is so rare these days.  A bit of the grand gesture once in a while with a dash of love is great.

Mostly, just be who and what you are.  And consider the kind of woman you are seeking to attract and why.  

If you want a woman of substance and character, you have to become a man of substance and character.  If you only want a night of playing bumpy-bumpy, then shallow doesn't matter much.  

Sounds like you read a book telling you to be an S.O.B. to get women.  Yes, it will get some, but they may not be the kind of women you really want in your life for any length of time.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: SmileySpirit14 on March 16, 2004, 17:09:32
dont tell guys that!!! then theyll get sooo cocky and braggy!!! i cant stand braggy ppl! i like ppl who just wanna have fun. like getting drunk and partying or a skate party...but most ppl there get high instead of drunk...but it dont matter cuz its FUN
oh i got a little off the topic didnt i? well i hate braggy people!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: James S on March 16, 2004, 18:44:40
To act according to some kind of "success with women" formula, or act like someone you are not may land you a one night stand or a short superficial romance. If that's what you want, fine. Go for it.

If you want a relationship with more substance, if you want to find a true partner and not just a bit of fun, do not try being anything other than yourself, otherwise you will fail.

It really need not be complicated at all.

[:)]
James.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: atalanta on March 16, 2004, 20:58:12
If you look at the idea of evolution, then it suggests that the female of each species will look for a mate that will provide the greatest possibility of healthy/successful offspring.

It may be therefore that some women may misinterpret a males behaviour which is egotistical and arrogant as being strong and confident.  In other words, she thinks she is getting a successful mate when in actual fact the guy may be a loser dressed up to look as a winner.  It may not be politically correct but women are stupid that way.

We are however, no longer living in the woods and in loin clothes.  Now there are other indicators to women that speak success.  For example, a guy may not be the best looking or confident but he has a heart of gold and a wallet to match.  This means even if they don't produce the best offspring there is money to provide for the plastic surgeons, safety and comfort in the future.  Its not they are gold diggers, just that these women look at the idea of what means a successful male/mate in different terms.

I know from my behaviour, I prefer the second version.  I would rather marry a geek who is kind, intelligent and has a good career path, than a guy who is handsome, 'in control', alpha males, mucho, whatever you call them.  In my perception, a guy is in control is also likely to turn around and become a threat to me by trying to control me.  So for me, there is nothing that turns me on faster than someone who is open, gentle, kind, humanitarian, compassionate, etc.  

I guess in the end you have to be yourself though because no matter how much you can doop a woman, eventually she will find you out.

Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on March 17, 2004, 12:32:11
I dont speak on being completly arrogant (neither the author of the mails) but on being like a player: funny and always showing to the women that you play the art of seduction. Honestly i cannot believe that womens like romantic guys. ALL the girls that i met until know only like guys that have at least one of this qualities: money, social position, nice body (at least not a thin guy like me) or beautiful face, self confident. They see romantic guys as being stupids.

Well, i am not romantic but no girl will look at me because i dont look like Bradd Pitt or Tom Cruise. So, what can i do? Act like a wussy? I mean "Oh, i love you, blabla, etc"; or act in a more funny-cocky style? A style that includes acting with respect to womens and being courteous, but not by kissing womens feet.

Womens say that they prefer womantic guys but you can see in their look, when thy are in front of a Bradd Pitt kind men that they change their attitude. Honestly, i think that body it is the master choice (it surpass the funny style). Of course that womens will argue "No, no i like funny guys", and i answer : "ahaha, do you believe in Santa Claus too?".

When younger i was always  the ugly guy, and only the nice-looked friends were the "winners". Why: they were beautiful and as a result they were some how arrogant. The strange point is that womens liked that kind of arrogance. I was younger and coouldnt understand how the hell womens would look only to beautiful but arrogant mens. I was shocked but now i understand thatit is part of nature.

I will not be critical to such attitude/choice, the only thng that i criticize is the fact that womens wont admit that: they prefer alpha mans, the ones in control, beautifuland somehow a little bit arrogant. My observations confirm that, so if i wish to have sucees, i just must act like that. When i apply that idea i can guarantee you that it works: with shiny womens and even with fatal womens (you can bet it- it worked).

Shiny guys will never have sucess (i never had while being shiny).
They must change their attitude.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: The AlphaOmega on March 17, 2004, 14:22:53
My girlfriend tells me that the one the qualities that attracted her to me are my sense of humor and my confidence.  My mother also says that's what attracted her to my father.  Bottome line, if you have these two things, you can get women.  Being cocky to me tends to look like you're totally serious.  Always careful when you smile as to not look uncool, etc.  If you can make girls laugh, it's going to build confidence within yourself, and that too will attract them.  They go hand in hand.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Ramiel on March 17, 2004, 14:53:18
There is truth to some of the original post. But instead of pretending you have a certain quality, develop it yourself, its much more powerful then. Case in point: confidence.

Girls crave confidence. A man who is confident is in control, and knows what he's doing. I've found the better looking the girl, the more she enjoys the chasing aspect. One girl I know wont even consider a guy unless he completely ignores her. Why? Because then she knows its game on!

During the 'courting' phase, before you actually go out with her, there's no problem in playing this game. I play it at the basic level, but it infuriates me that I have to wait so long before going after a girl I'm interested in, so I always mess it up on purpose and just let things fall into place themself.

After you're going out with her there is obviously no problem in showing your romantic side. In fact there is no reason why you shouldn't show it straight away. Confidence and Romance go hand in hand, not against one another.

If you want to impress a girl, become well read, knowledgable, and interesting. Pick up your level of fitness, eat well, and if you're not very fashion-minded, become fashion-minded! Oh and cologne is great too.

Those are my tips.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: ThE_MaStEr_Of_PuPpEtS on March 18, 2004, 01:07:30
Just be youself because its much easier than trying to be someone your not. If a woman likes you for who you are than thats good. If a woman dosent like you for who you are, dont try to be the kind of person she wants, just continue beign yourself. Personally I dont care about what people think about me, because everyone has thier own opinon about another person. (its impossible not to have a opinion about someone, unless you've never seen or heard of them)

So just be yourself (maybe add a little bit to your personality, and do something different that will surprise them) and see which women like you for who you are. Also be truthful no matter what because it might get you into a difficult situation and never make up stuff like: we had sex (meanwhile you didn't) or some childish stuff like that.

Be Yourself!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: atalanta on March 18, 2004, 02:58:57
Here is the problem for you.  Yes you could go and do all those things, make yourself look and sound like an alpha male but for how long are you willing to do that.  Its like holding in your stomach as a beautiful girl goes by.  You can hold it in for a while but eventually you will have to breath and she will see what you really are like.

So you have two choices.  Settle on who you are and stop looking for girls who are looking for alpha males if you are not one.  Find someone who is on your level and isn't looking for something different.  Secondly, become an alpha male but become one completely.  Study on what an alpha male looks and sounds like and fashion yourself after them, but do it thoroughly, don't pretend to be one.

I want you to know this is not just a male problem.  I think this is a bigger problem for females.  I am an intelligent, educated, attractive person, from a good family, who would make some guy a great life partner but I get looked over for the thin girls time and again.  I know that I am not the only female in that situation.  There is even support groups for women who go through these issues.  I always wanted to lose weight so I could be more attractive to the opposite sex and then I realised that I would never succeed at that because I wasn't doing it for me.  Now I am doing it for me and my health.

I guess what I am saying is that this is not a male or female issue and faking being someone else will only fail in the end, because in the end, the person who you will grow old with and who you have to face every morning in the mirror, is yourself.  Be true to yourself and like yourself and the person you attract will also be true to you.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Ybom on March 18, 2004, 05:39:45
What some people don't know here is that much of this thread is insanely biased towards alpha maleness. What you all need to be wary of though is the title: The Art of Seduction.

I am not willing to go down the alpha male route, simply because with being an alpha male there is always the problem of pain. I've never seen an alpha male not get hurt or hurt himself on some level, but many think it is worth it to satisfy the basic human inside all of us.

I say to all of those people out there who think like that: I feel sorry for how misguided you've been. Are there any alpha males (or females) out there who want to come to the other field where the grass is sort of greener?
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Gwathren on March 18, 2004, 08:38:33
ahah, nice topic there. I think being arrogant is not good. Being a slave is just as bad as being the god to a woman. I think the "golden way" where there is enough of everything, but too nothing too much would be the best.

Gwathren
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: MJ-12 on March 18, 2004, 10:20:49
Good point. Being an alpha male means you have to put up with alpha females! [:P]
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: rhinegirl on March 18, 2004, 10:37:22
quote:
Originally posted by MJ-12

Good point. Being an alpha male means you have to put up with alpha females! [:P]



I'm an alpha female but I don't like alpha males because most are arrogant to a fault and often are insecure children when all is said and done. I like a small men who is confident and knows how to submit.

Jessica
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on March 18, 2004, 12:04:25
In the art of seduction you are not different from yourself.
For example: budhists teachs that you must develop your patient, your awareness, attention (focus on breathing, etc), learn to "hold" your apetites, learn to love and develop goodness, compassion, etc, with the main purpose to reach the illumination.

It seems that your transforming yourself in other person. Maybe you are but you are making that for something good. And if you are a truly bodhisatva, you are doing such not only for you (to cease with your self suffering) but equally for the others (the same: stop suffering).

Well, when developing your qualities to seduct a woman, your making yourself a little better. You must do it not only for that night/dating day (unless you just want sex, etc) but also for yourself and your partner.

Just look: in order to become a better seductive person, you must to start by looking into your body: nice hair, clean shaved face, a little parfum, adopting a good diet, fitness, etc. In the end you have just adquired something good for you: a better looking that it is good in many situations (employment, etc), not only for seduction.

Part two: mental development: now that you have a reasonable look, you will need to impress you partner when speaking with her. What do you need for such? Many things, lets see some:
- being funny
- self confident
- cult and inteligent
- sympathique and gentleman but never in a "Oh, dear i am crazy for you"
- etc

This qualities, if developed with the intention of seducting womens, will also be useful in other life aspects. Maybe you are acting a little different from yourself, but you are becoming better.

I must say too, that acting cocky-funny-alpha man, it not being a gorilla but a man that knows the game of seductio, someone that knows how to make womens getting crazy for you. Well, in this specific part your are not acting different from you: you are just being yourself but in a specific situation (and everyboy acts in different ways for different needs)- seduction.

To make her get crazy there are many little tips that in conjuction and if well used, certainly will work (alpha women, shiny women, etc): the art of ignoring(this includes atcing like if you didnt have special interest in her); never say yes; always be funny; physical comunication: eyes contact, position in the "field", occasional touch, etc; there are many more tips...but i am not the expert!

Nay, rhinegirl,atalanta, jenadots, vicky, etc: does anyone want to date with me? It is just that i want to test this techniques...[;)]
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: MJ-12 on March 18, 2004, 14:12:23
as
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Nagual on March 19, 2004, 01:31:00
Hum...  why do we have to seduce?
It sounds like hunting for food or trying to sell oneself...
Hey, that's maybe why I am still single!  [:P]
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Syke on March 20, 2004, 02:09:49
Nagual, I agree whole-heartedly.

I'm sorry to say but I just find this whole thread kinda silly. Changing yourself because you feel some need to be with another person.
But it's not just that, you seem to need to be with someone better then yourself... it sounds like you have self esteem issues.

First better yourself for YOURSELF. You don't have to be in a relationship to be happy, especially one that you have to change yourself for.

And I'm not liking the way the hopeless romantic guys are being dissed here. At least they're being themselves and not changing themselves just so a woman will like them. Who's the real 'wuss', the guy who is being himself and wanting his partner to be happy, or the guy that completely changes himself in the hope that someone will then like him?

I'm not saying I know everything about dating...  being only 17 I know I still have alot to learn. I just dont understand why people feel the need to be in meaningless relationships. I'm quite content on being single, and if there is someone I have a strong connection with then I'll start a relationship.

Do it for yourself, not for others.
-Syke
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Reality on March 21, 2004, 06:36:35
It is clear that you have read the teachings of David de Angelo. He's the man!

Dave teaches men the skills that allow them to get dates WITH THE WOMEN THEY WANT.

And yes Cocky/Funny is one of his main concepts, and it is not ARROGANT. It's saying something cocky/slightly arrogant in a funny way. It's an art of communication that indeed causes women to feel attracted to a particular guy. It's kind of comparable of how you would tease your friends, and that's very fascinating to women...

I could write for hours about this subject..but you better check it out yourself...just look it up in google or something.

later!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Reality on March 21, 2004, 06:43:54
And it has nothing to do with 'not being yourself'.

It's giving yourself the tools to get the women you want. Like you would install software on a computer. In other words: evolving!

Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: atalanta on March 21, 2004, 23:50:38
"And it has nothing to do with 'not being yourself'.

It's giving yourself the tools to get the women you want. Like you would install software on a computer. In other words: evolving!"

Maybe I am wrong or does this sound really sexist?  It brings up images of Neanderthal males with clubs over their shoulders going out and bringing their prize trophies by the hair!  Women are not 'things' to be won over using some 'tools' or computer program.  They are human beings and yes there are women who are going to fall for these methods but you are going to have to be fake in order to get them.  Any male that takes this up is absolutely 'not being themselves'.  Seduction, teasing comes out of the relationship, relating to each other, not out of some male who uses some 'tool' to convince a female(the target/object, etc) that he is worthy of her.  He should believe he is worthy of her without having to apply tools and programs because as soon as he does that, he is testifying that he is not that very thing.  That is, as soon as you try to act like an alpha male or anything else is the moment you are pretending and therefore not that thing.  

Sorry, blame it on Lacan.  God, some uni study actually stuck to me!

[;)]
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Reality on March 22, 2004, 03:56:20
quote:
Originally posted by atalanta

"

[;)]



Ah you know it's allright of you to think that, and I won't even bother to prove you otherwise. I really like the neanderthal comparison though...lol! :D

But let me give you this. Insecurity and Neediness are your enemy's when dealing with women, and I'm sure the creator of this topic will agree with me.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Ybom on March 22, 2004, 06:48:06
Where there's insecurity and neediness, it's the job of both (or more in some cases) of the people in it to resolve them. If neither are patient enough to want to deal with the worst of issues, then maybe the relationship wasn't meant to be.

Last time I counted there were over 3 billion of each sex on Earth. That leaves a good chance there's a fish for you too, even if you're a cannibal or something.

One thing I did like so far in this thread was the David D'Angelo reference. I did a quick Google on him, and I seemed to have come across his personal webpage http://www.oursites.org/daviddangelo/. Instead of going on about my comments about what I think so far, I'll send a contact out to him and await a response, based on an unbiased view of this thread.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Reality on March 22, 2004, 08:42:06
Hey that is not the David de Angelo. That's another dude.

Listen if you want to know more or sign up for his newsletters. This is his real website: www.doubleyourdating.com.

But if you search well you should be able to find old newsletters on the web....just type "cocky and funny" and you'íl find some references guaranteed.

Have fun.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on March 22, 2004, 12:13:58
Why does everybody says (Reality its with me) that you are stoping from being yourself? You are just being yourself while seducting a women, but you act litlle different. Please, dont come with stories! Everybody knows that when we are with someone we love (but it is not our boy/girlfriend) or the "target" you wich to conqueror the most natural thing it is to act differently! I dont believe that many of you can act exactly the same way. When she(he) is near, all of your body and mind react in a different manner. Only if you are a Shaolin Monk or if you have a heart of stone (wich are different things) i think that everybody reacts differently because of some main reasons:
- she(he) is the one("target", lover, etc) and that is enough
- It´s a sexual aproach (and dont say that it is not, that it is something spiritual, blabla, etc that i wont believe- unless you believe in Santa Claus too...) and in every sexual aproach humans, like other mamals and animals, will react in a different way in order to conquerer (and this is extremely natural, please if you dont believe start to pick up and read some Biology books and then observe human reactions).
- well, i had other good point but my mind get blank...if i remember i will edit this and put it here!

BTW, Reality: i think that that was the name: Dave the Angelo.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on March 22, 2004, 12:21:03
Hey girls, check this out on David forum and then give you opinion, i am just curious on it:
http://www.doubleyourdating.com/page2.htm

BTW: lool, this is very funny, it seems that mens on this forum are trying to understand a strange being from other planet, lool[:)]
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Reality on March 22, 2004, 16:32:57
Exactly, it's indeed natural to act differently towards someone to who u are sexually attracted to...I mean when dealing with beatiful women its all to easy to turn into a wussbag because of their overwhelming beauty. But if you want to have these women feeeel attracted to you ...you have to stand above that by being confident, funny, and definetly not intimidated....in short ...stop treating them like they are celebreties. And really...it's the reality of a beatiful women that men kiss up to them and that they get their way no matter what....but then when they get to meet a guy like me..lol..they'il think ...hey...this guy is different then the others, he doesnt kiss my butt at all!

And here's a new perspective on the oh so great just be yourself advice...I mean imagine a dude who hasnt had a girl for 6 months, you tell him to just be yourself...then 6 months later...still nothing...just be yourself aint gonna be enough..And really what is being yourself all about? What is yourself? We were formed by information and idea's which have created certain attitudes and believes towards thing of how to act...sometimes you find that beliefs have been based on wrong information...an example of this is thinking that courting a women with the romantic stuff[diner, flower blabla] is gonna make them like you...

And the problem is...most men arent even themselves with women...they often tend to act nicer...which doesnt trigger attraction on its own..No i think u should never say to anyone again..just be yourself....not if that yourself hasnt booked any serious succes that is!

Then....we go back ...the cocky and funny part...you should really try it sometime...just behave like u have a little to much confidence in a funny way....u'il find that women tend to behave more open, and nicer and ofcourse shoot something funny back at you from time to time :), its a really fun experience actually...and it feels natural.

well thats enough for today:)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Reality on March 22, 2004, 16:44:17
quote:
Originally posted by Vicky

Ok, here is my answer :) I think this is very true that women prefer very confident men. I myself got married for a one [:I] who used to captivate all of my friends hearts. He in my opinion is perfect - self confident. He doesn't say (usually) Where do you want to go? but says: I will take you somewhere. insetad. So, yes, the too romantic men are a bit boring  and irritating. But that doesn't mean a guy should not be romantic. He just has to know the limit. My brother used to have a girlfrined who he would do everything for and she took him for granted and felt maybe even too good about herslef. So she broke up with him and then he started ignoring her and really not caring about her anymore and then she "realised" how much she loved him[?] She started chasing him literally. The more he would ignore her the more she would be after him offering him to go out bliah bliah. So, that was my opinion [:I] I do think that a man has to be good in first place, respectful and confident :)



Thanks for your input. I couldnt agree more! And it perfectly makes sense that the girlfriend wanted the boyfriend back when he started ignoring her.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Nay on March 22, 2004, 17:25:00
[:D] very humorous link.  So much thinking going towards something that really shouldn't be thought that much about..it should just happen naturally.

Yet here I am sitting, trying to think of what made me marry to the two men I did..(separate times people..[^])  I had many red flags from the first husband but I guess for my own personal path and on a unconscious level I knew I was going to be learning some lessons, I chose to ignore those flags.  He did nothing I liked..hehehe..sounds stupid now, but I needed a out... a out from a terrible disfunctional family.  I struggled for years trying to find the things that I wanted..well, long story short, we divorced.  

Ahhhh, now on to the new hubby..[:D][:D]

We met, we saw, we liked, we lived together, we married..hehehehehe [:D] it was simple as that!  No mind games, no pretending, no nothing...just us.  He is my best friend ever, we talk about any and everything.

Now for the differences in the two..

Hubby one... mean, abusive, controlling, a all and all out not nice guy. The one thing he had going was he was a great provider and a good dad.. This is for those who think women will stay with a man with lots of money...not true.  I gave up everything just to get myself back and what a pay off.  I'm blessed with two wonderful children from him and he taught me how to balance a check book..[:P]
Those were my lessons from him..

Hubby two...Kind, gentle, quiet, and selfless..  I can't say there was any way he acted that attracted me to him, it was his soul.  Ok, I know that sounds hokey but true.  Have you ever met someone and just have the instant connection?   You look into each others eyes forever?  We rarely argue and even then we call it, "having a discussion"..hehehe..

So I say....stop looking for "it" and stop pretending in order to find "it"..    "IT" will find you, when the time is right.

Nay
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: atalanta on March 23, 2004, 01:17:24
Of course, we all act differently.  We are putting on a social face because we are not sure where each relationship will head and we are laying ourselves open.  This isn't just for romantic relationships, but all relationships.  It is part of the excitement of meeting someone new and sexual tension and the dreams of a future with that person, etc.  It is also part of self respect, wanting the world to see the best image of yourself.  Yes, we act differently, however, it is not about conquering.  Conquering implies a winner and a loser.  That if you apply these techniques, you will be a winner by getting the woman, however, this implies that you are currently a loser. It also implies that if you do conquer she will be a loser.  It is a win-lose situation in the short term but a lose-lose situation in the long term.

Here is my advice, learn to love and respect yourself, to know your true worth in this world.  If you can do this, lovers will fall at your feet.  People are attracted to confident, loving, happy, caring and honest people.  Do that and you will have all the women you want without having to convince them of your worth.  Look at motivational speakers, really there is nothing great about them.  They haven't cured any disease, stopped world hunger, but they are so attractive because every pore in their body exudes life, energy, confidence, caring, etc.  Don't copy them, become them.

Gosh, I think I will become a motivational speaker after all this![;)][:D]
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Reality on March 23, 2004, 04:02:23
quote:
Originally posted by Nay

[:D] very humorous link.  So much thinking going towards something that really shouldn't be thought that much about..it should just happen naturally.

Yet here I am sitting, trying to think of what made me marry to the two men I did..(separate times people..[^])  I had many red flags from the first husband but I guess for my own personal path and on a unconscious level I knew I was going to be learning some lessons, I chose to ignore those flags.  He did nothing I liked..hehehe..sounds stupid now, but I needed a out... a out from a terrible disfunctional family.  I struggled for years trying to find the things that I wanted..well, long story short, we divorced.  

Ahhhh, now on to the new hubby..[:D][:D]

We met, we saw, we liked, we lived together, we married..hehehehehe [:D] it was simple as that!  No mind games, no pretending, no nothing...just us.  He is my best friend ever, we talk about any and everything.

Now for the differences in the two..

Hubby one... mean, abusive, controlling, a all and all out not nice guy. The one thing he had going was he was a great provider and a good dad.. This is for those who think women will stay with a man with lots of money...not true.  I gave up everything just to get myself back and what a pay off.  I'm blessed with two wonderful children from him and he taught me how to balance a check book..[:P]
Those were my lessons from him..

Hubby two...Kind, gentle, quiet, and selfless..  I can't say there was any way he acted that attracted me to him, it was his soul.  Ok, I know that sounds hokey but true.  Have you ever met someone and just have the instant connection?   You look into each others eyes forever?  We rarely argue and even then we call it, "having a discussion"..hehehe..

So I say....stop looking for "it" and stop pretending in order to find "it"..    "IT" will find you, when the time is right.

Nay



:D balance a checkbout

You should send a letter to David D sometime, he loves feedback from women, and he often includes them in his newsletters...woooh...your chance to become famous..lol..no actually not...he only shows ur initials ;)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Ybom on March 23, 2004, 22:50:30
Nay,
you described my relationship to a T. I just was pointing out that there are others who rely on the "it" will find you philosophy. The one thing that really hit home in your message though was "we talk about any and everything", which is one of those special signs...however it isn't the only one.

So, with that available, why would I want to have this new personality again? Permanent happiness vs not being me happiness? Your choice I guess.

Good luck [:)]
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on March 24, 2004, 11:43:06
quote:
Originally posted by Reality


And here's a new perspective on the oh so great just be yourself advice...I mean imagine a dude who hasnt had a girl for 6 months, you tell him to just be yourself...then 6 months later...still nothing...just be yourself aint gonna be enough..And really what is being yourself all about?



Nice point! When someones changes the attitude to become a better person (helping people, majing the goodness), etc, it is changing the "yourself" and becoming a new self. He(she) is making that for better. Now, with relationships it is the same. You are changing yourself for something better.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Ybom on March 25, 2004, 15:49:33
Posted by Kazbadan:
"Nice point! When someones changes the attitude to become a better person (helping people, majing the goodness), etc, it is changing the "yourself" and becoming a new self. He(she) is making that for better. Now, with relationships it is the same. You are changing yourself for something better."

Reply by me:
I only sense bias beyond reason in your words. Can you prove that this way is better? Can you totally make me see why my ways are wrong? I doubt it. Just remember not everyone has to be like this to have a strong love life.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on March 26, 2004, 12:52:18
No, i cant prove it but if you feel that it is better, why not give it a try? If you are (as said by Reality) six months, and then more six, etc being yourself and you cant get nothing in your loving life, why not try something different?

You still being your self. Why?

Imagine for a little: what is "I" of "me"? It is just a set of sensations. For example, if in majority, that set of sensation, the one that dominates it is, lets say, depression, so you will be considered a depressive person. And even if you have some moments of happiness, you still being considered depressive, just because that is the main sensation/emotion that dominates your being. Thats an unfair and quantitative view of the world.

Inmy point of view, we are just what we are in every moment. Of course that i understand that in such view, if someone is bad in all the time of is life, it is certain that he will see, in the future, the consequences of such act. Not because of some divine intervention, but because life it is like a pool game: you shot in a ball and the ball is going in the direction of some other ball. It is inevitable that such ball will "suffer" the consequences: it will be get "catch" by the white ball. This is karma: effect and consequence.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: wantsumrice on March 26, 2004, 20:54:22
Hmm, i guess i can be the living testament of that Ybom.  I used to be such a little unconfident guinea pig.  But once i analyzed the situation i figured that:

1) If i keep going on the way i am, i won't get any happier.
2) By increasing the chances of keeping the interest of a girl, i theoretically increase the chances of finding one worth the time.  
3) Hell, I'll be much happier being more confident.

So i changed my attitude, built up my body and increased my confidence.  By doing so, not only did my lady friends increase, but i was gaining respect by my peers and thus being much happier. [^]

It's all about choices.
~ivan
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on March 16, 2004, 13:54:18
At some weeks ago i was receiving (i dont know how or why) a mailing list of a guy that apparently is an expert in the art of seduction.

All that he says makes sense and i will resume briefly the ideas that he says:
Womans dislike guys that are always in their feet, "wussy" guys. If you want to "conquerer" a woman, you cannot give flowers and presents and being romantic because with that you are showing to the woman that you are interested on her and thats all. With a romantic behavior or by being always "chasing" (almost boring) a woman, you are just saying "I like you... please i need you, come to me!". You need to make the woman saying that, not you!


The problem is, if you wish to have sucess with her, you need to start to act in a way that will "trigger" the atraction in the woman. Stop to act by saying "I love you".

To achieve this you must act in what the author calls the "cocky-funny" way, you must be a little arrogant and pretencious and funny too. Imagine James Bond (Sean Connor)style: he hangs the attention of a woman by being funny and being arrogant (i mean, arrogant by showing that he is self-confident).

Besides that yo must play very well other games in the seduction: never say yes to a woman. If you say no to a woman you are saying "I am independent and i know what i want", i mean, if you ask to a woman "Where do you want to go?" you are showing weak power of decision and women loves men that know what they want.

Avoid giving to the woman what she wants, but give her that only when you want. Always show thatyour are the leader.

There are other points like your gestures and manner of speaking and dressing that affects too, but the point is: to seduct a woman act like being self-confident, cocky-funny and showing that you are the "boss". Of course that many times you must be gentle with her (give massages, kiss, etc) but not in a "wussy"/romantic way.

Always play with her and always have a good answer to her. F,ex:If she says that "You are not a man for me", you must answer to such in a nice cocky funny way, like if what she said is not important. Maybe you could answer "Generally womens are intimidated with nice guys like me and avoid (chickens) me by saying such things" and then give a smile." or "I am a race to high for your wheels to win, i understand you!" [smile again and change the topic].

So, womans: what do you think about this ideas (mens too, answer)?

Do you prefer a[:I] and [:P] guy or do you prefer a [8D] and[:D] guy?




Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on April 20, 2005, 00:34:48
Now this is a topic I consider myself to be qualified to answer.  I am a pick up artist and well on my way to becoming a Pick up guru.  I am a member of a board at www. fastseduction.com (no, my name is not Hans Solo there).  Read everything by Tyler Durden PDF 7 on, toecutter, Mystery (go to the archive search, then find a little blue link that says Gzip archive).  AND DEFIANTLY READ TYLER 25 Points post.

The person you were referring to was David Deangleo and I am intimately familiar with his work.  However, first trying to be cocky and funny is a learning experience for most.  I would rephrase is to be 3 things : charming, cocky, and funny (most people that try this are not funny enough and come off like a**holes).  David is very cerebral but you only get good by approaching in the field.  

I have a little easier time because I am very good looking, but often because i do know David's techniques and many other women often call me a "player" (we all have our own hurdles).  

BUT the best thing you have to understand is TO BE THE MAN.
Never loose your cool.

Never supplicate (buying drinks, etc).  

Have alpha male body langue.  The easiest way I can describe this is to walk like you have a cape on and you can't let it touch the ground(walking very tall),you can't let it touch your back( you will be leaning back) and lead with your hips and not your chest (walk slowly).  In fact all your body language must be perfect (97% of all communication is body language.  Read this: http://www.fastseduction.com/discussion/)

EYE CONTACT:  will help you the most early on (along with body language)  LOOK THE GIRL DEAD IN THE EYE AND MAKE HER LOOK AWAY FIRST.  This will be very weird at first but they LOVE it, and then approach.  Don't do this and then keep doing it--that is stalkerish.


The reason I have my name here of Hans Solo is because he is the perfect character with women (along with tyler durden in fight club).  Make your reality stronger and more interesting than hers and you will always get the girl.  YOU CANT BORE A GIRL INTO FEELING ATTRACTED TO YOU! Be the adventurous bad boy.

Princess Lea:  "I love you"
Hans Solo:  "I Know" :D

However, If you REALLY want to get good then I suggest you learn from the best in the business.

www.mysterymethod.com
www.realsocialdynamics.com
www.badboylifestyle.com

PS.  Don't fall into the "I just wanna be myself crap".  Once you internalize these techniques and theories they WILL BE a part of you.  Only, a more confident you that now attracts the type of women he wants instead of settling, and ultimately not  choosing the life you want to live.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Frank on April 22, 2005, 21:18:48
Ha ha ha, that was great. Walk like you've got a cape on, lol, and a Utility Belt too I suppose, and take her home in the Bat mobile. :)

I'm sorry, I'm just joking, I truly mean no offence.

Hmm, but you reminded me of something and I was trying to think of the blokes name. Ah, it just came to me, Ross Jeffries, yep that's him. Wasn't he the original "speed seduction" guru?

It was back in the days when NLP was all the rage. Seems like an age ago but it was only the early 1990's. Funny how events come and go. But he had all these funny speech-pattern gizmos that you're meant to recite. Like you talk about blowing up a balloon and that's meant to symbolise having an erection and oral sex and that kind of thing. Problem with that is, from my point of view, I'd never want to be with a woman that would be daft enough to fall for that kind of nonsense.

I came across it because I was a fan of Dr Richard Bandler at one time and there was some reference or other that I saw. Thing is with all these "techniques" is they are like the door-to-door sales stuff, in that they all fall down when someone just slams the door in your face, or she looks you in the eye and says, "P*ss off freak, who do you think you are, Batman or somethin'?"

The thing about being charming, cocky, funny and good-looking is you have such a mega advantage over us "normal" guys. I mean, provided you don't fart in her face and puke on her bedroom carpet, you are going to get laid. In my experience, and I have had the good fortune to have had great relationships with some stunning-looking women (and currently do have), is a lot of these women get hit-on by charming, cocky, funny good-looking guys to the point of boredom. What I kind of specialised in doing was picking off the ones who wanted someone "different".

Facial looks do count for a lot, which is what scuppers me totally. But I always kept my body in excellent physical shape, which never fails to give a good impression. A coy, ever so cheeky smile helps too, together with a naughty but cute little giggle. Both of which I've managed to perfect over the years, lol. If I had to explain what I mean, then you have to give them a smile like you were having an affair with the woman, and you had to keep it private, like no one knows but it's bubbling out of you and you were almost trying to bite your lip to stop yourself. It's really difficult to explain and I'll probably get in trouble for this, lol. Anyhow, what I'm getting across is you can't just go smiling all over your face else you'll become that, "Weirdo who always laughs when he sees me."

Eye contact is extremely important. But if you just stare and don't soften it with a little "cheeky" body language (particularly facially) you'll fire off her stalker-alarm in an instant. Mouth expression is important too. Talk closely to a woman and you will see how much she is intimately interested in you by the number of times she'll look at your mouth. Become more observant and you will learn to anticipate her glancing down to look at your lips. As she does so you can "accidentally" make an ever so slightly suggestive lip movement like showing the tip of your tongue while licking your lips (but VERY subtly as that's highly suggestive of oral sex), or nip your bottom lip and flick it outwards and pout your lips slightly. I stress these actions are very subtle. Get this wrong and you'll fire off her, "Weirdo Alert!" alarm.

The other thing I would suggest to any guys having problems is to totally avoid all the typical "pick up" places and practice just talking to women generally while you are getting your body into shape. Getting your body into shape is 90% of it. Very little else impresses a woman more than a guy with a nice body. But you have to pretend that it's "accidental". There is nothing more off-putting to a woman than a guy who is so full of himself it makes her want to puke. Unless she happens to be one of the tiny minority of women who likes guys who are full of themselves. But these kinds of woman never interested me anyway.

Anyhow, talking to women is very important. I do this all the time, as it has become a habit with me. The places where I shop, for example, I know the women on the checkout, I know their names, and so forth. The woman in the post office, in the bakery, etc., etc. There are just women everywhere you can talk to. Even just a few words here and there. All the women in my locality who work at the places I go to regularly, they all know me and enjoy me giving them a big smile or a cheery wave if I see them out and about.

But like the eye-contact thing, you've got to modulate your approach otherwise you'll become that, "boring guy they just can't get rid of."

I agree about guys not buying drinks and stuff. That is so crass these days and far better to let them buy, it's a lot cheaper that way, lol.

Yours,
Frank
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 23, 2005, 07:49:55
So you are saying that body its 90% important...hmmm...my body its awful (genetics).

I think that luck its not on my side and that David DeAngelo just wanna sell more stuff when he says the opposite...

Why the hell did i born with a monstruous look? ARrgh!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 23, 2005, 10:33:36
I can relate to the fact that women like self confidence. I am actually quite an attractive guy and can seem confident to the uninitiated, until they get to know me and realize I have some social weaknesses and am very sensitive.

I have found I can attract woman, but I can't seem to hold onto them. In one case, there was one who was holding onto me!

But unfortunately(well, not really) this is me, I am sensitive, I am quite romantic and I do believe in love. I am honest and I am nice. I am the kind that admires beauty and would choose lover over power.
One of my philosophies in life is a woman is a very fragile creature, and she should be handled with sensitivity and care. She should be touched sensuously and caressed delicately. Because that is what gives her pleasure. And that is what gives you pleasure as well. To touch her soul, is to give her pleasure.


Ignoring her, being arrogant and cocky. Is not giving her pleasure. It's just feeding her ego, and her true self, her soul, is further buried.  Such women at the lowest, are constantly taken advantage of by men. Otherwise, a woman is a very beautiful and sensitive creature, and the sensitivity of a woman is what makes her a mother or a wife. It's all about yin and yang, friends. A woman is said to be an epitome of selfless love. Sacrifice is associated with the woman. She can love unconditionally.

Now, by not feeding her ego, It means I won't get many or any mates, then that's alright, because I am not interested in mates. What I want is someone who completes me, with whom I have a spiritual union - where I can feel love. Otherwise, why would I need a woman?

I am actually content in remaining celibate for the rest of my life and not having sex again. Sex does not make me or break me. I can live without most things in life, and if my ego fights me, I know I will overcome it with my sheer will and resolve.

I don't need a woman just for frivolous fun, social status, acceptance. No, thanks, that's just not me.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 24, 2005, 08:54:27
I cant live without sex, love, womens & Cia! :-)

Celibate: noooo!!!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 24, 2005, 11:53:30
Kazbadan, I often say, that if you take something away from you other than your very basic needs for survival(food, water and shelter) and you feel incomplete without it, then it's not good for you.

All you need is yourself. You are already complete in every way, just don't know it. That is why you are born alone and pass away alone. If you can learn to live in this frame of mind,you will transcend all desire and become a master of life.

Would you not want to be a master? A super conscious soul? A master, can both love himself and love others. When you touch the soul of others, you are giving them love. When you intently touch someone(or yourself) sensuously, sexually, to give them selfless pleasure, you are making love to them.
Try it with yourself or try it while eating food. You will notice what you've been missing all along.

There is difference between sex and making love. The souls loves and the love has an everlasting impression on your partners being. It really touches them. It's divine. The ego has sex and sex is not everlasting - for most a few min, for some an hour.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 24, 2005, 15:45:10
There is no love.

If you say that love its feeling compassion for other beings, like Budha or Jesus did, well, in that case i think that there is a true love.

Now, the love that you see in romantic movies thats bullshits.

When i feel something for a women that because i need sex or some affection, nothing more.

If love between humans (the romantic love) was real, we wouldnt see so much spouses or husbands cheating each other.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 24, 2005, 16:21:52
I appreciate your honesty,

If I may, may I share some words of inspiration. Why so many spouses or husbands cheat on each other, is because most relationships are not based on love. Most relationships are based on what you admitted, needs, mostly bodily needs and the rest is power needs. That is why they cheat on each other.

As soon as the hunt is over and kill has been made, they move onto others. However, there are some relationships that are based on more than that. They are rare, but they do happen. They are based on love. They are the most rewarding relationships. I was talking to someone who had a relationship like this recently. He has been with his partner for 30 years. He told me how she was his best friend. His companion. His other half. He was merged with her. They were in touch with each other every moment, even when they were not physically with each other. That is true love.

What is love?

There are many forms of love, each form is based on a relationship, yes compassion is love too. Yet, they all share a commonality, they all have a touch. They touch you at the core of your being. When your heart is touched, we feel warmness and love, the kind of love we got from our mother.

When we are touched sexually, we feel a sensuality, an ecstasty, a tilitation. This is love also.

When I touch you, I am touching a certain aspect of you directly from my soul. When I shake your hand I am conveying friendliness. When I pat you on the back I am conveying good will. When I look at you with a genuine smile and tap on you on the shoulder. I am showing you compassion.

Yet, when I look at you playfuly and caress your body, I am being sexual with you. All are pure forms of love.

In fact you define love as the soul reaching out to another soul and touching them. It is very real. Have you heard the saying "touched by an angel" there are many who claim to have been touched by angels, and have been in states of euphoria for days on end.

You need a woman only for sex. No you don't. Your body needs a woman for sex.  Your ego needs a woman for affection. Your soul needs a woman to make love to.

You've never made love. You've had sex and this is abusing your soul's sexual energy, or your sacral chakra. Further, by treating women as objects, you are abusing your heart chakra.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 24, 2005, 18:54:33
Maybe i have this vision of love (i mean, there is no love) because i only see confusion, rage, suffering and hatress in this violent world.

I grew up having girls making fun of me directly just because i was very thin and that and much more bad things on my life make me feel insecure and with a big lack of self confidence.

Now i have much more and i ´ve recup. many "lost" things due to my efforts.

I´ve found for example that our inner state its a self confident state...being insecure and nervous its not natural, just a bad consequence form this stupid and violent society.

Well, now that i understand a little more of "playing" games with women, now that i have a more normal look, i just see women as "sex toys".

I know that such view its against my budhistic view of the world...but i dont care.

Affection its something that i will be less nedding. I have energy in my soul, and that energy its enough to stop my "wussy" needy feelings. I just need womens for 2 main reasons:
1) i love to play with them (teasing, etc)
2) sex (not only sex, but kissing, etc)

Its not a good view, but then what? They do the same....

They are not so fragile as you may think. These days they only care about sex...

You have a GF and you are ugly? that means that even if you threat her well, even if you are funny, playfull and a good lover, means that sooner or later she will cheat you just because you are ugly and she wants a better body to ****.

Womens work just like that...like man.

There is no love, only Darwinistic Evolution & SEx.

And i dont feel good for saying this.

Make good things to a women and love her like if she was an angel its a big mistake.
My experience shows that if you do that you will have 0 (zero)sex.

If yo play like DavidDeAngelo (great man) teachs (act a little like 007 or so) you will have GFs and sex.

´For example: in my work i have some "angelical" colleagues. Some of my friends will treat them very well.
Not me: i act in a funny and very playful way with sexual arousement and teasing. I am very thin but i have much more sucess with them... :-)

Why? Because there is no love (unless you speak in other kind of love, like the one teached by Buddha or Jesus).
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 25, 2005, 06:18:22
I can understand where you are coming from and why you have such an attitude towards women. But, there is something you are doing, and I am not sure if you know it or not, you are letting your past dictate who you are today. You are holding onto the negativie memories you experienced in the past, and this is shaping your attitude towards women today.

You did not like it when in the past girls did this to you. Now, in your present, you are doing the same to the girls. In the past the girls were hurting you and now you are hurting yourself. Now, think of a girl who really genuinely likes you, and you treat her like an object and value her like an object, isn't that a feeling your past-self could relate to?  Are two wrongs making a right? No they are not.

As someone with a Buddhist worldview. You need to realise that you are not in control of yourself in the present. Your past ego still has a hold on you. You need to overcome this ego. You need to let this ego know that you are now in the present and that every day is a new day.

Yes, I know so many girls do this. However, by joining them in doing what you inherently don't like, is only to your detriment It is affecting you psychologically and spiritually. That need for revenge - Is just the need of an ego to preserve itself.

All women are not the same. Just like all men are not the same. The girls in the past are not the same as the women in your present. Every woman is different. It is unheathly to look at all women as the same. There are some women who are just like you. Yet, you may have missed them.  Ask yourself, in the past when girls overlooked you because of your physical shortcomings, just what were they missing about you. Now, ask yourself now that you are just like them, and what are you missing about the girls who are just like your past-self, and how might they be feeling.

So for your sake, and their sake, don't throw every women into a category. Look at women, just like you wanted girls in the past to look at you. To look at you for you. Otherwise, what are you doing, other than continuing this vicious cycle of superficiality, that you've never approved off. You're giving in to your ego. Is that the buddhic way?

I am not trying to preach to you or change your beliefs and attitudes. I am trying to make you ask yourself questions.

QuoteMake good things to a women and love her like if she was an angel its a big mistake.
My experience shows that if you do that you will have 0 (zero)sex.

If your love is impure, then are you surprised, their's is too? Women are very perceptive, they can see through your actions, hey know what you really want. They can smell it.  Your affections, your caring, comes at a price to them - you want sex. Are you surprised, that they are not buying.

If your love is pure. You will get pure love. Like will attract like. Don't love because you want something, love because you want to. It is no different to the love Buddha or Jesus taught.

There is only one love. It is the energy of god himself and you use it in various ways. As I said try it, first by loving yourself. When you can love yourself, you will be able to love others.

Love yourself in every way. Love yourself in every way. Be your own friend, lover, father, mother, brother, sister, teacher.  Love thyself and others will love you as well.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 25, 2005, 08:19:46
I know wthat the things i say are agaisnt my Buddhistic perception of the world and i know thats wrong if i wanna reach inner peace and Nirvana.

But if want other things its not wrong.

I dont want any vengeance. I know that it meay sound like that but its not. What i am saying its that from my past experience i realised that womens are humans, that they are just like men. They just wanna to inflate their ego and have some passion on their lives, like we do too.

Acting in a sexual way with women its better than being romantic. Romantic guys or the guys that are sensible to women will catch a girl by luck. You may say that they will feel what you want (sex), etc,etc but that doens t matter. My own experience and the observations that i made with expert guys (real Don Juans, Masters of the art of seduction) shows me one things:

even the beautiful and sensible girls that you speak on, even that one will get much more faster sexually aroused by you if you act in a cocky-funny way than if you be a romantic-sensible guy...why? Because there is no love, only sexual tension, only sexual moves.

This is like a game. How do you explain the fact that such "angels" (ya, believe me ´cause i saw such angels falling in love for "bad boys") will fall down faster in the arms of a "bad boy" than in the arms of a sensible guy?

If i wanna have some love and affection i must enter in the game and be a cocky-funny guy that its always teasing her.

We are animals not spiritual beings, when we act in a sexual way. The day when i reach Nirvana (if i reach) i will not care about sex but i will not care about womens or affection because in that day wishs are just a shadow from the past. Thats a different kind of love, a love not built on sex but in compassion and wisdom. Until i reach that day i will still need womens for sex and in that case the game must be played.

I am gamer.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 25, 2005, 10:17:54
Sure thing, Kazabadan, if that is what you want, then go for it. But I don't understand what you mean by:

"Until i reach that day i will still need womens for sex and in that case the game must be played. "

What you really should be saying, when I am fed up of treating women like objects and want to have something more meaningful, I will walk a spiritual path. If you're not ready for a spiritual path; you're not ready. However, you can't do both at the same time. You can only walk on a single path.

Quoteeven the beautiful and sensible girls that you speak on, even that one will get much more faster sexually aroused by you if you act in a cocky-funny way than if you be a romantic-sensible guy...why? Because there is no love, only sexual tension, only sexual move

It will work for some and it won't work for others. Some girls don't like cocky, arrogant guys. Again, it depends what kind of girls you want. If it just for sex. You don't have to worry. If you want more, then you could end up disappointed.

QuoteWe are animals not spiritual beings, when we act in a sexual way. The day when i reach Nirvana (if i reach) i will not care about sex but i will not care about womens or affection because in that day wishs are just a shadow from the past. Thats a different kind of love, a love not built on sex but in compassion and wisdom. Until i reach that day i will still need womens for sex and in that case the game must be played.

Sexuality is a very natural part of the soul. Again, as I mentioned above, love is simply touching someone with intent. As souls we need to be touched in many ways to experience our full spectrum of feelings. That is what makes us alive. The union of spirit(purush) and matter(prakriti) is a form of sexuality. Sexuality is a very intergral part of our spiritual being. In the Bhagavad Gita Krishna says "I(purush) impregnate prakriti(nature)" There is a sexual energy inside you, called Kundalini, that is a pure sexual energy. Everytime you abuse this sexual energy by using it for lust, you are only harming your spiritual being, and depleting your Chakras of energy, and setting yourself up for physical dis-ease in your sexual organs. I think you seem to be under the impression that you can attain Nirvana(When I reach) by lusting after women and treating them as objects.  Most masters will disagree. Not only that, but you will have to work on the negative karmas you accure right now, in your later spiritual life, making it just that more harder.

Again, I am not saying it is wrong what you are doing. Only you can decide what is right and wrong for you. I am just letting you know you can't have both spiritual nirvana and the 'game' at the same time. You will need to choose which you want and deal with the consequences of your choices later.

I was reading in autobiography of a Yogi by Yogananda Paramhansa, that the true renounciate is not the yogis who retire to mountains. It is those who give up their spiritual journey, the unlimited, the universal love,  for a few toys. Giving up everything for something.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 25, 2005, 12:07:34
I know that i can follow only one path.

But i will still learn things for both, will they have the same route.

When i reach the bifurcation on those 2 paths i must choose only one way. Until there...
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 25, 2005, 13:09:00
You can never learn spirituality. You do spirituality. It will not make no difference how many spiritual texts you read,  how many gurus you meet or or how much meditation you do, if you are not actually living a spiritual life.

Spirituality is not some thing you do. Spirituality is a way of life. If you are not going to live as a spiritual being. Then, learning about spirituality will do little for you. If at this moment your path is sex, then concentrate on this path, and master it.  That ability to concentrate on an aim and attain it, is a skill that will help you in your later spiritual journey.

However, if you try to do two different things at the same time, your efforts are only half-hearted, and your results will be half as well. If you truly want to be a master seducer, then master this skill :)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 25, 2005, 16:45:37
When i said learning it was concerning to meditation. I need to learn (pratice) meditation. Meditation it can mean a lot of things, not only the typical one.

Data, sorry if i lok like rude to you but i was only saying the truth (to my eyes). Girls are so easy that i can only think that this is all a sexual game. Doesnt matter what you say, they (like us man) are animals and react to certain things.

Even innocent and very nice girls, that are very sensible will fall down to a great looking guy or someone with good skills. If that happens it means that you can make any girl "love" and that means that there is no real love.

For example, did you know that 66% (it can be more because many womens can be lying) of women that have a BF/husband/etc have in a regular base, sexual fantasies with other guys?

They will have lots of fantasies about your best friend, colleague, about their colleagues, etc...they have masturbation with that and you will dont notice anything...is that love?

If i had a  GF and i found that she was having sexual fantasies with other guy...wow! She would be in serious problems...

66% its just the girls that spoke...people that made the stdy believe that many more womens have fantasies..they just lied when answering to the questions....so, i think you can expect maybe 75% of women...thats a lot.

Every 3 women that you see in street, 2 of them will cheat their BF in their minds...and cheating in spirit its a step for cheating in real  life.

More about studys: dont know the % but almost every women will be always looking to other mens even if they are with BF. Studys show that women ant to partners: one its the "provider" th eone that will feed their childs, be a friend, etc. The other its the Lover, the one with guts that its playful, somewhat cocky and funny. Generally its good looking. That Lover its the one providing good genes for the women have healthy children..

Dont believe? Again I dont know the % but many studys revelaed that a lot of men that are married have children that are not of their own...

After divorce many husbands found that they were feeding other childrens..not from their chlids...great!

As you can see, women are not so fragile like that (and i dont complain, i face these things like facts and try to learn from it).. They are just sexual animals (like us).

I dont wanna be the Provider of any women, i wanna be (and i am even not looking very good looking...) the Lover of many womens...

So what d you say about these studys?

(again sorry if i look rude, but i just wanna have a nice conversation with you..i am liking it). :-)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 25, 2005, 17:28:49
All meditation will do is cause your issues in life to resurface. You will see them with greater clarity. However, meditation will not transmute them for you, you will have to take action to correct your issues. You may find what I have already identified as your issues, is what you will discover yourself.

As I said, your game and spirituality are very different paths, and they contradict each other. So, it important you choose a path. That is not to say don't meditate. That is like telling someone don't exercise. Meditation is not spirituality. It is simply a tool we employ to understand ourselves. A very powerful tool indeed.

Now, regarding the studies you are mentioning. Even though you have not supported them with facts. I do not dispute the authenticity of these studies. I will take your word for it. As is the case with all studies, where a sample is taken from society of x number of people, and then a percentage is shown how many support a certain hypothesis/activity/thought/product. There is a problem with this. A very inherent problem. It is grouping people together based on a few shared similarities, and ignoring the differences.

For example, say a drug is tested on 5000 people for a certain ailment, and of them 80% report good recovery, only 1% report bad side effects. Does this mean that if the drug is administered on you, it is most likely you will not experience side effects and will have a good recovery?

No, it doesn't, because you are not just a figure, you are a person. A very unique person. You have a unique physical, mental, psychological and spiritual mark-up. How this drugs works for you, is based on all these personal factors.

It was shown recently by a mathematician, that we will all experience a highly unlikely event in our life every few years. I mean the kind of event where you accidentally dial a wrong number, and find you have contacted a very old Friend, you have not talked to in so many years. Just, because something is rare, does not mean it will not happen to you. After all rare things happen to people don't they?

Now, apply to a case study where 60% of women prefer brash, arrogant guys. That may well be true, but it does not mean when you meet a random woman, that she is not in the 40%. She may well be. Even if 99% of women preferred arrogant, cocky guys. It still does not mean that a random women you've met is not in the 1%.

If you took 15-30 people and put them in a room together. There is 50% chance that at least two of these people will have the same birthday. When you walk out in the mall, you encounter hundreds of females, but with a 1% chance of finding someone who prefers romantic guys, it means you see a couple everyday. And when it is 40%, it means out of 10 women, 4 women prefer romantic guys.

So it's not they don't exist. You just don't notice them. They are there. Now, I don't believe in chance at all. I believe everything that happens in your life happens for a reason. You are reading my post for a reason. I am telling you  this for a reason. We are not figures or percentages. We are multidimensional conscious beings. So treat every women you meet, as a new woman, and discover her for who she is, and you may find the love you doubt.

As you said earlier. You would give up women and sex for the greater love of compassion and wisdom. And that's why I am telling you, you're missing something much greater about the relationship between a man and a woman. It's not that spiritual people can't make love. A spiritual person will define making love. A woman made love to by a spiritual person will have a spiritual and profound experience, and no amount of rough sex with arrogant men, will satisfy her sexual yearning after that.  Many of the great masters, yogis, seers and deities had sexual relationships. It is a part of life. It's a part of the soul.

As I said, try it with yourself first. Really make love to yourself. Touch yourself at the core of your soul and give yourself pleasure. If you can't love yourself, you won't be able to love others. Again, it is your choice what you want, sex(lust) or love. I would choose lover any day.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on April 25, 2005, 18:28:11
Back again to help you poor souls :lol: -  I am qualified in this area

Data-  you have a misunderstanding of women, and have taken the mindset of a touchy feely wussy (David Deangelos words).  ATTRACTION FOR A WOMEN IS NOT A CHOICE!!!  You have to be THE man.  You will instantly do better with women if you download the ebook here www.doubleyourdating.com .  

Frank-  you were right on in your last post.  Funny, when I saw your post below mine I was scared to read it because I love your post and felt you were going to debunk my post, but people would take it as Gospel because of your legendary status here.  Wrong again! :D

I love the way you talk about the coy smile.  Man i have this down to a science.  I call it my Bruce Willis smile.  It is sort of that half smile I use while "charmingly looking into her eyes" with a hint of sexual overtones.  A good example is Pierce Brosnan in the Thomas Crown Affair.  I also agree that most men get nervous around beautiful women and smile like a buffoon.  

"The bubble" -- once you achieve this state it is all over.  I call it the Deer in the headlights look.  Where she is totally absorbed in your stories, conversation, etc.

Most of my conversation with a women doesn't even matter, although I do have funny stories I use and the such.  Mostly it is the Way I say it.  I say it in a light hearted way but While i am saying it am always implying that she wants me (and I really feel this way).  If you would look at it from an outsiders position it may not even sound like a pick up, but there is drama going on that only we know about (David Deangelo calls it sexual communication -that CD set is great BTW).  Another great example of this is in the Thomas Crown Affair.  Almost everything Pierce says is in this tone-ie another shot of espresso.  

VERY IMPORTANT:  most guys walk on egg shells around women they like and are always thinking about if they should say this or will it offend her, etc.  This is very bad.  I always push the envelope, but it works because I will say anything and show them the depths of my soul-honesty works people (as long as you are not be a supplicate wussy).  Also, a women of quality will S***T test you.  For instance:

Her:  Man, your cocky/ That's an interesting shirt/ are you always this bold?
Hans Solo:  Glad you like it! :lol:  (always imply that she wants you)

I also do funny stuff like grab her hand and hold it, then accuse her of trying to hold my hand (implying that she was the one who initiated this act) and say "wow, sorry i don't hold hands with strange women i just met--man your forward!" -then give her the coy smile.  Or, if she disagrees with me I will thumb war her!  I am 25 yrs old and this still works like a charm.  It gets her to view you as fun.  

Kiss test her.  brush back her hair.  If she doesn't flinch, then look into her eyes then to her lips and back again.  She will know what this means, and if she doesn't pull away-go for it!  Always escalate or you will miss your opportunity.  

BTW, there are a lot of professed gurus out there.  Ross Jefferies is one that I don't take stock in.  Frank mentioned him, and I would not recommend him.  

This stuff is like the icing on the cake.  First you need to get confident.  To do this you may need to get in the gym, etc.

Bar pickup theory:  In bars women of quality are usually in groups.  So what I do is the Mystery Method.  This means that I will open the group (not opening my target) with an opinion opener.  Then I will engage the group in funny stories,etc.  While I am doing this I am ignoring my target (hot babe 9.0+).  She is not used to being ignored an will try and get my attention (if only to validate herself).  Once she does I will give her a negative compliment (backhanded compliment)  like "I like your dress, EVERYBODY seems to be wearing those now"  or "I love your shoes, i bet they looked REALLY cool when they were new"
    Now, her group really loves me because they don't think I am there to pick up their friend anymore.  I may give another NEG like if she touches my arm say " that will be forty dollars"  or act like she spit on you and while wiping away the invisible spit say "yew, you just spit on me. yuck"  but then kind of half smile at her.  However, I then say to the group "I have been alienating your friend here, you won't mind if i borrow her for a second do you" , then you isolate her from the group.

THIS IS WHERE YOU BUILD RAPPORT-not before.  You only build rapport from the group before you isolate her.  Then do cold readings, commonalities, etc.  I you want to know more check out the best in the business www.mysterymethod.com  (he may be coming out with a book soon on this), if not check out www.fastseduction.com.  By the way, dont try this bar pick up theory until you have read a lot on it because you will screw up royally at first.  But the power to walk into any bar and isolate the women you desire is priceless.  

****EDIT****7/29/05**

I no longer use the mystery method and have changed my model to a pick up guru named Juggler which relies less on patterns and more on being an all round interesting person.  There is a GREAT ebook call Converstional Jujitsu by the juggler and he has a new one on his website.  He also now does workshops at http://www.charismasciences.com .  I have not taken a workshop but plan to in the future

*******************

This is why I am unique, Frank, most charming, good looking guys telegraph way too much interest at first and extremely good looking girls are used to this and say "I already have him around my little finger--boring!".  I telegraph the opposite, ie disinterest.  Only when I have her peer groups approval do I then telegraph interest, but ONLY after she earns it through my qualification round.  I qualify her by saying stuff like(report stage) I hope your like having fun, because I don't date girls that are boring".  Then she will tell me how much fun she is etc.  I always get them to keep qualifying themselves to me. Girls will backwards rationalize that if they are qualifying themselves it must be because they like you!   The best book on the subject is at www.Realworldseduction.com.  Sometimes I will even say "Do you have anything else going for you besides your looks, because beauty is fairly common."  Then they will start to qualify themselves to me, and then I will show interest because of THESE qualities in her and not because of her beauty.  Sounds harsh but I tone it down with my voice tonality and playfulness.

NEVER QUALIFY YOURSELF TO A WOMEN, HAVE THE MINDSET THAT YOU ARE ALREADY QUALIFIED AND YOU KNOW IT.  

BE EXTROVERTED and HAVE FUN, if you are introverted (like me) fake it until you make it.  

NEVER TALK ABOUT GAME KILLER TOPICS, ie anything logical (men topics).  These topics include talking about her job/your job, weather, where she lives, goals, etc.  She will bring these up sometimes to qualify you.  for instances:

Her:  how old are you?
Hans Solo:  Old Enough!  :wink:

Her:  What do you do for a living?
Hans Solo:  Well, I am a break dancer!/ televangelist/etc  :lol: (never answer these questions directly, always be coy and playful)***edit: I have since change tactics and use more of a juggler style here.  



You want her to be as emotional as possible.  Talk about celebrities (read US/people magazine) and their drama.  I know, I could care less too but most women like this stuff.  Talk about metaphysical stuff (shouldn't be too hard for us)--women eat up astrology, tarot, esp, etc.  Funny stories, etc.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 25, 2005, 18:47:59
QuoteBack again to help you poor souls

By telling me to not be myself. That does not really help my soul.

QuoteYou have to be a man

I can't really help not being a man. I was born a man.

"Wussy"? Respecting someone and treating them as a person is just something that is natural.

As for the rest of your post. What if the next woman you tried your techniques on, has read your post ;)

What you are saying is women like confidence. Sure, nice guys can have confidence too and holding a decent conversation can show confidence, and you can show interest. However, acting like you have confidence, by following certain rules, is simply setting yourself up for disappointment :) How long can you continue a facade? Ah I see, it does not matter, it's for one night stands. What if you want more?

No offense, but a guru who helps you discover yourself to love yourself and others, is better than a guru who teaches yourself how to change your personality to get sex.  In fact to call such a person a Guru is a corruption of the word. You are a piece of work, seriously.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 25, 2005, 19:03:52
This further reminds me of a movie I saw based on certain rules of attracting the opposite sex. All the "rules" discussed so far were covered. Anyway,  the rules work, and the person gets who they wanted. However after all that effort she is very dissatisfied. It's not she who got this man. It was her rules and campaign. She felt like she had cheated herself and this person.

And what is pertinent here, is following these rules may get you someone you desire, but there will always be someone within you who will cry foul, and wonder if you could have done it by being yourself.

Personally, in my humble opinion, you should always be yourself, not someone else. You're just cheating yourself. At the end of the day your self is much more than a body.

At the end of the day, you should ask yourself, why do you want to seduce women anyway? If it is sex you want, you can get it easily. Obviously it is more than sex. Do you want to brag about it to friends? Score lists?  Will it make you feel more of a man? It is unfortunate that you need to do this to feel better about yourself.  It just shows how little you think of yourself. Ouch!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on April 25, 2005, 20:00:55
Quote
Personally, in my humble opinion, you should always be yourself, not someone else. You're just cheating yourself. At the end of the day your self is much more than a body.


Talk to any of your female friends about pickup, and odds are
they'll answer with some variant of this.

"Just be yourself, and everything will be fine."

At this point you're most likely sitting there thinking to
yourself, "Nonsense.  I've been myself my entire life,
and it's not really getting me the type of women I'd like! If
anything, I need to become DIFFERENT than how I am now!"
first, if being yourself is being somebody who can not attract the opposite sex, then you have to change albeit a little.  Funny thing is once you apply these belief and rules they WILL Be a part of you.  The "Be Yourself" argument is a weak one.  What we mean is: (copied from www.realsocialdynamics.com newsletter)

If someone tells you to be yourself, they don't mean to keep
on engaging in the same old behaviors that haven't got you women
in the past and just shrug your shoulders when it doesn't work
out.  What they really mean is to drop all of the filters of
insecurity in your head and start expressing yourself
congruently.

In other words, don't *just* be yourself, be a hyper version of
yourself.  People who are operating on a very pure level
internally are magnetic. It's not about making yourself over
into a new person, it's about letting go of that which STIFLES
the attractive person that already lies within you. (btw: being a wussy, ALWAYS sensitive "are you ok, what can i do for you-want me to beg" type crap will stifle attraction and ruin relationships)

What I mean by this is that, over the years, we tend to
accumulate a set of beliefs with regard to social interactions,
especially interactions with the opposite sex, that sound
good on paper.

But when push comes to shove, a lot of these beliefs turn out
to be empty platitudes that can end up working AGAINST YOU.

As you grow and become more socially intelligent, you learn
to recognize these old cliches for what they are. You may
even come to a point where you start to actively work to
eradicate the behaviors associated with them.

Like, the guy will think to himself, "All that stuff is weak...
that's just BS that society puts out to throw people off the
track... I'm a REAL player, I won't fall for that."

The funny thing, however, is this: behind all these apparently
butt-backwards cliches we've all heard since high school
about the best way to go about picking up women, there exists
an element of truth.

These are the hidden nuggets of wisdom that only a true mack
with a real-world understanding of the mechanics of the game
can pick up on. No pun intended.

What am I talking about here? Let me give you a couple of
examples.

First off, there's that old admonition you used to hear
constantly from your teachers and parents when you were a kid:

"You should think before you speak."

This is one of my favorites. My dad used to say this one to me
all the friggin' time.

"Boy, you need to learn to THINK before you speak!!"

Ok, makes sense. Of course.

The problem is this: a lot of guys get waaay too wrapped up
in this. Especially when they're interacting with women.

For example, you have a guy talking to a girl at the bar.
And he's sitting there talking to her, but in his head, he's
always trying to stay two steps ahead, to ensure he doesn't
say the wrong thing and blow it.

It's like he's Garry Kasparov or something, trying to defeat
IBM's Deep Blue supercomputer in the chess match of the
century. Contemplating every possible move and permutation
in advance, so he'll be ready for it.

Got to be READY!!

BZZZZZZT!!! Wrong.

It's ironic, because when you're constantly trying to stay
ahead in the interaction, you actually end up sabotaging
yourself.

What happens is this: by not focusing on being in the moment,
you end up killing the vibe.

In pickup, rhythm is so important as to be paramount to
success. Rhythm, expression and confidence are all
intertwined. If your mind is always thirty seconds in the
future, you're going to sub communicate bad things about
yourself. Why would someone secure in their abilities be worried
about "screwing up"?

Think of it like this: it's the difference between a novice
guitar player struggling to remember which notes to play next,
and Jimi Hendrix just riffing and flowing straight from the
soul. If you've ever listened to a live Hendrix album, you know
what I'm talking about. (If you haven't, I suggest you download
some immediately and listen to it while you read the rest of
this newsletter). One sounds stilted and awkward, the other
sounds honest and soulful... you can't help but be drawn in.

By walking on eggshells and being concerned about what others
will think of what you say, you're creating a gap between
your true self and the persona others see.

This gap exists within everybody. In people who are highly
charismatic, the gap will be so small as to be insignificant.
There is literally no difference between what they feel inside
and what they project to the world.

This is universally attractive to all people.

So, back to the original point: guys get into the game and
they learn that this advice is, let's say, "not so good". As
a result, they dismiss it outright as "chump conditioning".

But, as I've come to realize, there's some hidden treasure in
this dung heap.

As I've gotten more and more experience up in the game, I've
started to develop a field intuition about certain scenarios.
This intuition is basically my brain instantaneously comparing
the situation at hand against all the information gleaned from years of going out to meet women.
When you get that many interactions under your belt, you gots
quite the preponderance of data to draw from.

So, for example, I'll be talking to a girl or a group of
girls, and they will say "X". What happens is that my brain
searches the database for similar experiences and brings back
suggestions.

Note that this happens INSTANTANEOUSLY. Your brain is an
extremely powerful heuristic computing machine, more powerful
than you know. Every sliver of information you've ever
taken in is stored in it, somewhere.

So when this happens, it's not something I'm consciously
doing. It just happens.

The way it practically manifests is the interesting part.

Rather than throwing up suggestions of what to say, my brain
spits out WARNINGS of things to NOT say or do. Like, my brain
searches the database and comes back in a nanosecond with a
warning: "DON'T DO THAT... LET IT GO... IF YOU DO THAT IT'S
GAME OVER!!"

Let me give you a quick couple of examples.

Let's say I'm interacting with a group and someone in the
group says something that sets them up for a joke at their
expense. I have the perfect response for it, a response that
I KNOW will get people around us falling down on the floor,
clutching their sides in agony because they're laughing so
hard. I get ready to spit the line out...

...when all of a sudden something stops me. It's my brain,
telling me that, yes, the joke might be the funniest thing
I've said all month, but it will tinkle off the wrong person
in the group, and I'll end up blown out of the set. So I
bite my tongue and move on. Sure, I didn't get the laugh, but
I'll get the lay instead. Oh well. :)

The funny thing is, when I first got into the game, this
warning wouldn't have come up. I would have just blithely
spit out the line and been left there scratching my head in
puzzlement after I got blown out.

Here's another real life example. I'm getting ready for a
date with a 19 year old I met last week. I know that this is
ON, so I spend a couple hours getting my house ready for
when I pull her back to it. This means mopping the floor,
dusting, cleaning the bathroom, etc.

So I call the chick up, and all of a sudden she tells me she's
flaking on me to go to a ballgame. What the hell? I'm
pretty irritated, especially since I did all that housework.

So I start to say to her, "But, I even cleaned the bathroom
for you!"

BZZZT!!! My spidey sense starts tingling like a mofo! "DO NOT
SAY THAT! DO NOT SAY THAT!"

So instead, I say in a sarcastic tone, "Awww, I'm so
disappointed. I hired a limo, had flowers flown in from
Brazil, and even got a concert pianist from France to make the
night special." She starts laughing and agrees to meet
up after the game. I she came over that night... SOLID GAME!

Now, what happened there was, my brain searched the database
and came up with this: telling her that I cleaned my bathroom
would raise her "anti-slut-defense". Why would I clean my
bathroom? What am I expecting, her to come back to my house
and sleep with me? Oh my god, how shocking!

Based on past experience, I knew this was the incorrect course
of action, so I changed my tack and succeeded.

So basically, what I'm saying here is that when you hear
someone say, "You should think before you speak," the true
meaning isn't that you should walk on eggshells and carefully
weigh every word that comes out of your mouth.

Think of it like this instead: it's more a matter of installing
BEHAVIORAL FILTERS in your head that guide you down a funnel
of choices that lead you to your goals in a given interaction. As
you accumulate more and more experience, the filters become more
comprehensive.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Novice on April 25, 2005, 20:26:55
Han -- no offense, but everything you wrote totally turns me off. And for the record, I am a woman. The things you describe as technique's I've had done on me more times than I care to remember and all of them were just as fake as what you were describing.  :roll:

So, let me clue you in on one woman's suggestion. If any of these things work on a woman, its because she's only interested in the same thing you are at the moment ... sex. Or she is too desperate to "find" someone that she can't or won't see through the falacy you are dishing out. I am speaking candidly only here, I am by no means judging you.

Also, for those interested in long term relationships and not simply one night stands, no woman who wants a relationship will EVER go out with someone she meets at a bar or other pick up place with the expectation that she's found him. Only if she wants something casual and quick will your lines 'work'. Believe it or not, women can see through all of this stuff for what it truly is -- flirtatious banter. And there's nothing wrong with that if that's what you are into. But please don't believe that what you are describing works on all women. Unfotunately, I'm embarrisingly amazed at the number of women these lines do work on. And I am probably in the minority when it comes to what women are attracted to. I have never been attracted to the 'bad' guy type. But from what I read most teens and women are. (I still haven't figured out why myself!)

If you are following in Mel Gibson's footsteps in determining "What Women Want", its pretty much going to vary depending on the woman. We are all unique, just as all men are unique. But there are certain commonalities. I will post what I think and have seen as important to women in general.

I think the original poster may have misunderstood the word "wussy". I personally don't find a man attractive if he doesn't have some self-confidence. Now, having self-confidence is a far cry from having him as "my boss" and strutting around like super man. I like people who are self-confident, but also humble (not a common trate unfortunately). But I also think self-confidence is a relative term in this subject. To a strong willed woman, an arragant man may seem simply self-confident. But to a woman who is more shy and introverted, he my come off as bossy and arrogant, and vice-versa.

Second are men who are honest. If they don't know something, they say so. They don't feel the need to prove themselves to everyone they meet. They also don't pretend to be things they are not. For most people, its extremely difficult to fake sincerety. But there are those that can.

Humor is a BIG plus for me and many others. You need to be able to laugh at life and most of all yourself. Don't take yourself (or your super cape) so seriously.

A man's intellect is also important. I need to be able to hold an intelligent conversation with him. Your mind lasts much longer than your body, so make sure you are at least equally attracted to the mind of the individual.

And, sorry Frank. I have grown to have an immense amout of respect for your thoughts and experiences here related to phasing. But I must disagree with the whole "body is 90%" comment. I am in the far opposite corner of that opinion. In fact, men who are all buffed up simply turn me off. I have absolutley no interest in them whatsoever.  Granted, I'm not prone to obeise individuals either. But someone who is simply healthy and a has a body that looks natural, (not like he's been taking steroids) are what I look for. Although this last comment appears to be a more personal one and less general one. As I see many men and women way too caught up in appearances. I personally find it so sad some of the stuff people go through to meet society's view of a perfect body.

And for a brief personal insight: I am married to a wonderful man. What attracted me to my husband first was his smile, his eyes, his sense of humor and his mind (we met as a blind date!) But what I am still attracted to (after 3 kids and 16 years together) are our conversations and inside jokes. He is still wondefully fit, but I don't love him for his body, I love him for what's inside of it.

Anyways, that's one other (married) woman's opinion on the subject.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on April 25, 2005, 22:12:29
I dont do things that women say they want.  I do things that women respond to.  Also, I only go after girls that have extremely high self esteems and are absolutely beautiful.  My personality, when I go out,  is extremely close to Tom Cruise in Top Gun (not quite so arrogant) .  You have to understand this is all done tongue in cheek.  FOr instance, you will joke around with your friends like this and it is ok because you know this is a form of rapport.  When you do these you HAVE to do it in a funny way.  I dont do negs on women I would rate as an 8, it is reserved for 9s and 10s.  Also, the neg does not feel like a slap in the face.  It is just teasing.  I treat them like a bratty little sister "I love em, but they annoy me."


ALSO: caution men.  Women will always say this type of stuff (see above).  This is because when you ask them what they want in a man they immediately think of a heart throb like Brad Pitt and say "how would I want Brad to treat me".  Well, I would want him to be nice, and sensitive, etc.  All the stuff I say is extremely scientific and well documented behavior of Alpha Male Men/animals and press evolutionary buttons in women.  Read ANY romance novel (women porn) and you will see that the man is a rebel that the women wants to tame.  It is never some lame kiss A** that worships the ground they walk on in the beginning.  Dont get me wrong I am a hopeless romantic, but know how to play the game.

women hate to love me

Hans (jedi master)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Frank on April 25, 2005, 22:38:30
Ha ha ha, Hans Solo, you have some style, man, I'll grant you that. Cheers for your comments. You don't have to explain to me, I know the smile and the look into her eyes... and just the little hint of... and the just ... and the...

I know what you are saying brother. Ha ha, words cannot really explain that kind of stuff... I just know EXACTLY what you mean. It took me long enough to learn, lol.

With respect to Data and his opinions: a touchy-feely wussy, whoops, it sounds rather harsh of you to say. But believe me I do know what you mean, because I've seen guys make that mistake so many times.

I totally respect the fact that other guys may come to the conclusion that celibacy is for them. I'm treading carefully here because amongst us guys it's a touchy subject. But I just LOVE women, I ADORE them. I feel like I came here to enjoy them. I don't want to abuse them or anything. I want to be friendly with them and enjoy what they have to offer. As I say, I just love women. I simply couldn't live on this planet if there were no women.

The thing with me is I always loved the idea of being with a beautiful woman. I mean a really beautiful woman. Not just beauty in the eye of the beholder, so to speak, but a woman who could stop traffic. When I was younger, the thought used to drive me crazy. Problem is, I had to admit the fact that my face looks about as appealing as the back end of a double-decker bus.

Anyhow, I concentrated on 1) working on my body and, 2) my attitude... as these were the two things that I felt were completely under my control.

Now, at age 46, after having had some great relationships with some stunning-looking women (and currently do have). Two of which were actual photo models, one of whom was a dancer and yoga teacher. Ha ha, she was so darned flexible she taught me sexual positions that have still to be invented, lol. I would say that in the "chat up" stakes (although I very much dislike that term) attitude is the number 1 by a LONG way. But a nice body presents an excellent impression.

Provided you have the right attitude and a nice body, she will make up excuses to like your face. That is my experience, and she would have to make up some darned good excuses, lol, to like my face. Though I have yet to meet someone who will like my face long enough to complete a lifetime relationship... hmm...

So in a sense I was always playing catch up to the good-looking guys.

In my experience, the guys with a good-looking face win. Hans Solo, you are one lucky mother "F****R"...

For the rest of us, do not even try competing with these guys.

However, if all a guy has to offer is a face, when her attention moves down to your chest, for example, and your pectoral muscles are non-existent, you might find her wanting more, so to speak. Women love to be held and nothing holds a woman more securely that a pair of strong masculine arms.

As you hold her with your arms, she will want to snuggle into your chest and feel the heat of your (heart). Well, it won't be your heart exactly but your chest muscles. They don't have to be bodybuilder size. Don't get me wrong, my body is absolutely nowhere near body-builder size, but it's nowhere near your average 46 year old either.

All a guy really needs to do is, go to the gym, find the squat-rack and chest press and work on them. That way you'll create thighs and a butt that could crack a walnut and arms and a chest that will envelop them. Okay, you've gotta kind of work on your back too, and chest-press doesn't actually work your arms all that thoroughly so you'll have to think of a few extras... but you get what I mean.

This may not create all that much of an impression at 20-something. But I'm 40-something, 46 in fact, and for a guy my age it is very rare. So now I have that in my favour. Call it a long-term investment, lol.

So I would say to the "not" so good-looking guys then work on your body and your attitude. That is what I did, and it worked for me and I'm sure it will work for you too (provided you have all your personal hygiene and dress-sense in check).

Body is important if you do not have the facial looks. Otherwise, when you try out the "attitude" it simply won't add up. It'll feel like you are faking it. You'll look at yourself in the mirror and try to recite all the chat and you'll think, nope, that's not me. In other words, guys, you have to feel it first. Ha ha, I just thought, this 'aint astral-projection stuff this is normal guy stuff, so... you know what it's like! We have to live it!

It takes a lot of confidence to approach these luscious-looking lovelies.

It's easy to say, and don't get me wrong because I fully respect what you are saying Hans Solo, but at the time... wha-hay, you don't need to tell me, I know what it's like. You have approached her and said something and now you're just standing there looking into those gorgeous eyes, that mouth is just looking totally ravishing, but you know she's not gonna kiss you... she is gonna blow you out... the words hit you, and... yep, she 'aint smiling, lol. Ha ha, tell me about it.

With women, there just has to be that extra something. And if you don't have it, no amount of chat can make up for it. Okay, that's my experience, FWIW. But I've walked the talk in this, just as I have with the astral projection stuff.

Hans Solo: You started out by saying that possibly I was going to debunk you. No way! On the contrary, I would be very interested in hearing any other pointers you may have as I feel it is important to us "ordinary" guys. Some of your juicy "exploits" I am sure would go down very well as encouragement.

Yours,
Frank
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Frank on April 25, 2005, 23:14:05
Novice:

Thank you for your kind comments regarding my work, but this is Astral Chat. So, time to let one's hair down, so to speak. Although I "astral project" on a daily basis, I am also a man with some rather ordinary male needs, such as a loving relationship with a similarly inclined female (being a heterosexual focus).

Yours,
Frank
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on April 25, 2005, 23:46:30
Thanks for the kind words:

This post was long but it got lost :cry:

Ok briefly

1. Most guys are clueless in the gym.  they have about as much luck as an atheist astral projecting.  All they need is guidance, and a great book for this is Body for Life by Bill Phillips.  I got down to 5% body fat in college do this program and am getting on it again.  BTW, get myoplex at www.Vitaglo.com (will save 50% over GNC).

2.  Most guys suck at fashion and dressing themselves.  I personally dress like Constantine on American Idol.  I used to have no fashion sense until I started looking at fashion in magazines and movies and ask myself why certain things worked.  I have incredible fashion now.  GUYS:  GET GOOD SHOES.  A women will over look alot if you have nice shoes, clean fingernails/breath, and smell good (Marc Jacobs/ Dolce & Gabbana for men cologne).  I can hear the scream of "materialism" now.  Hold on, I got 2 pair of BCBG shoes, never worn, for $45 dollars (total) on Ebay.  Considering these are $179 a piece I got quite a deal.  I always get good deals.  Try and cut down on the number of blue shirts in your closet.

3.  Keep the sexual tension alive in a relationship.  NEVER let it go slack and become an Uber wussy once you are in a relationship.  Do the things that worked to get her.

4.  Get knowledgeable on sex.  This is a very touchy area that most men don't like exploring/ pursuing more knowledge on.  Put you egos aside and learn- you shall be rewarded.  If you don't know where the G spot is you are an amateur.  If you think the G spot is the best,you are an amateur.  Read David Shades Sex Manual--nothing like it in print.  You will learn about the DEEP SPOT-orgasm machine.  You see, most women have had Clitoral orgasms there entire life.  This is where they are very sensitive after they go and don't like to be touched.  Deep spot orgasms will be a whole body sensation and they can go and go and go (very powerful).  These are Extremely powerful and sometimes they will ejaculate  (looks like they are peeing).  Anyway, just read this book.  He gets into some hardcore stuff but just take whatever you are comfortable with.

5.  Learn the art of storytelling.  Weave fascinating tales in everyday conversation.  Tell the most mundane things in an interesting way.  For instruction on this watch the movie Don Juan Demarco (GREAT FLICK).  See how the way he talks about his reality becomes almost a drug to those around him.

Homework assignment:  Watch the ladies men in these movies and see what they all posses:  See how their realities are magnetic to those around them.
1. Top Gun (I know you have seen it---SEE IT AGAIN!)
2. Don Juan Demarco
3. Fight Club (Tyler Durdens character)
4. Die Another Day (bond)
5. Legends of the Fall (triston)
6. hans solo in star wars movies
7.The Tao of Steve
8. Thomas Crown Affair

Kiss tip:  Run you hand up the nap of her neck very softly until you come the base of her skull.  Close your hand into a fist (with hair inside silly) and gently pull.  This is an evolutionary trick and gets them very hot :lol:
continue to kiss passionately.  Dont just kiss normal either.  Sometimes I will tell them to stick out their tongue (in bed) and I will caress it with my tongue, then over her lips, etc.  Dont be normal or average be extra ordinary

Hans solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Frank on April 26, 2005, 00:27:47
Ha ha, so you know about the "orgasm" stuff as well. That's pretty powerful. I suppose that's putting it mildly. :)

"Try and cut down on the blue shirts in your closet" I like it! I'm sure many of the guys here will pick up a lot of tips.

Yours,
Frank
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: mactombs on April 26, 2005, 01:20:50
Quotethey have about as much luck as an atheist astral projecting

Actually, I started astral projecting as an atheist, so it clearly isn't impossible.  :wink:

I think you have good tips, too, Hans Solo. But be careful to not become too metro-sexual ... I guess that relates to becoming wussy, though.

I'm surprised I haven't seen a lot about other womanly traits that can be very sexy, such as high intelligence, charisma, and so forth. There's only so much you can tolerate a lovely body and a lousy mind. There's got to be a balance there for anything long-term.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: alexd on April 26, 2005, 05:45:23
Haha my girlfriend also doesn't like it when I wear blue shirts, I don't know what's with that.

Those are good tips Hans Solo. I think it all comes down to confidence and respect, and being able to express it in a special way.


Alex
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 26, 2005, 06:36:44
Well, there you go Hans, Novice(a woman) has told you how repulsive she has found you. As I said, every woman is different, and most women, believe it or not, will go for 'nice guys' for long term relationships.

It's not that you are playing with her. She is playing with you too.

Finally, being confident is what I can definitely agree with. However, you can't pretend to be confident, and if you do, someone will call your bluff and make you look like a "wussy" Being confident, does not mean not being yourself. Your true self is confident. Always has been.

Rather, than telling people to follow formulas(which will not work for every women, mind you) Give them tips on cultivating their self confidence. That is all you need.

Thanks Novice, for a 40% woman's perspective ;)

Frank, regarding my comment on celibacy. I love women as much as the next guy, but I look for more than just body(90%?), I look for soul. Yes, I may have some issues with going for someone who is particularly unattractive, but at the same time I won't go hankering after very beautiful women. Most of the time I find them to be very cold just at a single glance or in a single conversation. Not to sound arrogant, but I actually reject them. I tend to go for attractive, intelligent and warm women/ I also like the "cute" quality.

However, as I said, if I never found a woman like that again, I am very content in remaining celibate. As I said , sex does not make me or break me. I don't need it. I could say I have gone beyond that as a human being and seen it for nothing but a temporary pleasure, that pales to insignificance in front of the indelible impression of pure love.  I don't go looking for women. I never have. It is just not me. I just let life flow and let things happen. If there is true love in my destiny, then it will happen. If I am suppose to be celibate, then it will happen.

You could say I am spiritual. I say I am just sensible and mature and have self-respect
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 26, 2005, 06:53:46
I must be quick now (got to go):

1st- HANS SOLO, whats that about blue shirts? Is that so ugly for womens?

2- DO you have an email? I would like to contact you (dont worry...i am not going to throw a lot of emails to you...just have a few questions).

thanks
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Novice on April 26, 2005, 08:29:04
QuoteALSO: caution men. Women will always say this type of stuff (see above). This is because when you ask them what they want in a man they immediately think of a heart throb like Brad Pitt and say "how would I want Brad to treat me". Well, I would want him to be nice, and sensitive, etc. All the stuff I say is extremely scientific and well documented behavior of Alpha Male Men/animals and press evolutionary buttons in women. Read ANY romance novel (women porn) and you will see that the man is a rebel that the women wants to tame. It is never some lame kiss A** that worships the ground they walk on in the beginning. Dont get me wrong I am a hopeless romantic, but know how to play the game.

As I mentioned in my last post Han, I am not the typical woman. I have never read a romance novel (the outside covers alone make me nauseus). I don't consider Brad Pitt hot or attractive. To me, he's average. Same with Tom Cruise. But again, I've never gone for the bad guy type nor the pretty boy type (which I classify Cruise as). However, you are correct that the vast majority of women (note, not ALL) do seem to be attracted to these types. And for the life of me, I can't figure out why. (I personally am hoping for some evolutionary leap in that area at some point in time).

However I do not think that women want men catering to their every whim either. There needs to be room for some indepedence on both sides. There is a balance between these two extremes that I personally find the most attractive. It doesn't have to be all or nothing in this area.

Now, I will agree with you and Frank about attitude, if by that you mean what I would term 'charisma'. There have been a few guys I have known in high school and college who had this. They weren't very attractive at all physically. One was short and stocky, another short and lean and a third one who was tall with an average build. None were built very well as far as muscles go. But they all would have girls stop them on campus and ask to kiss them. I always just laughed at this because I found it hilarious. They weren't cocky, as much as they were confident. But by confident I mean they simply liked who they were. They were content and happy with themselves and it showed to everyone around them. They didn't care what others thought. That kind of confidence, being happy with who you are, is very attractive to people of both genders I think. Its a presence they have about them. They can walk in to a room and turn heads without making any noise of there appearance. There are woman who can do this as well. There is this magnetism you can turn off and on whenever you want (yes, speaking from experience here). So if this is what you are describing as far as attitude, then yes I do agree with you.

As for the tricks and tips on "how to get a woman", I'll leave you to discuss hunting procedures with the other men as that's not really what I'm interested in!   :wink:

And for the record, I don't find Han repulsive, simply amusing. I have no negative emotions towards him whatsoever. As I mentioned, his techniquest don't work on ALL woman, but they do work on many. And for those men who disagree with what he is saying, I simply wanted to assure you that not all women find these approaches attractive. And that doesn't mean these women are "lower than an 8". It simply means they have different priorities to which they are attracted. Play to your strengths and you'll find the right person.

Good Luck![/list]
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 26, 2005, 09:25:51
Novice, you did say "you were turned of by what he said" I would say it was being repulsed, hence repulsive. Yeah, I understand however, that word does carry a few connotations, that makes it sound more harsh than it is really.

I just want to share something else. Have you heard the saying "She's playing hard to get" or "He is playing hard to get"  no offense Hans, but most of the women you try to pull with the "arrogant, cocky" routine, already know what you're doing. Those who bite, are only biting, because they want to play as well. I am sure women have their own tricks up their sleeve. Did you see "sex in the city"? :lol:

I actually found that program amusing. It's hilarious when you see people so obsessed with sex, and all they ever talk about is sex. There is so much more to life than these superficial hedonistic pursuits. As one philosopher put it, the unquestioned life is not worth living. Sometimes, it seems that people have not evolved past the animals. That is unfortunate.

Unfortunately, there is something called reality, and remaining oblivious to it,  because one is caught up in games, is not going to change it.  It's great having fun with life, but the universe is a not a vast playground, it is also a place of work, worship, loving and growth and contemplation.

When someone tells me they would rather live this kind of life, than pursue their self, what I am really hearing is, people want to remain asleep. It's all about that red pill and blue pill business.

It's not relative really. While, some people choose a life of worldly and hedonistic pursuits and limit themselves to their body, others expand themselves intellectually and spiritually, and become much wiser and enlightened, gain greater understanding of themselves and life, and almost become superhuman. They are much superior and they can lead the sleeping masses, teach them, or some even take advantage of them.

Again, you got to respect and admire the governments of this world, who pull strings and make everyone dance. Look at the Bush government for instance, how they are making everyone give up their freedom, for a promise of security or how they have rallied up people to support  and pay for meaningless wars. I can't help but admire that.

Now, it is a sensitive affair, to say one kind of person is more superior than another. People, don't like being told that. However, could it not be said Krishna, Buddha or Jesus was superior to the common man? Could it not be said Einstein was superior to the common man? Could it not be said God is superior to man?

Could it not be said that Neo is superior to everyone else in the Matrix?  Personally, I think it can be said. Certain paths in life are superior to others. If, people have chosen inferior paths, they have every right to, but that does not change the fact that it is an inferior path.

Sex, as most masters will tell you, is an inferior act, committed by inferior people, ignorant, foolish and unwise people. Love is superior act, committed by superior people(masters, angels, selfless people) One is unreal and ego related. Another is real and soul related. No one can convince me that there no distinction between man and god. The distinction is infinite. Just like the distinction between an atom and  the universe is infinite.  A man who thinks otherwise, is foolish, and reality will eventually catch up and show him that.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: micko on April 26, 2005, 10:01:57
David DeAngelo.. Don Juan.. So Suave.. ASF..

Hoorah.. good stuff Hans  :D
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on April 26, 2005, 13:43:56
QuoteSex, as most masters will tell you, is an inferior act, committed by inferior people, ignorant, foolish and unwise people. Love is superior act, committed by superior people(masters, angels, selfless people) One is unreal and ego related. Another is real and soul related. No one can convince me that there no distinction between man and god. The distinction is infinite. Just like the distinction between an atom and the universe is infinite. A man who thinks otherwise, is foolish, and reality will eventually catch up and show him that.

 I agree. I love all women, but especially beautiful ones. :lol:
Also, I love making love to lovely women.  See data that is 3 loves in a row, that should be enough!  J/K my man.



QuoteNow, I will agree with you and Frank about attitude, if by that you mean what I would term 'charisma'. There have been a few guys I have known in high school and college who had this. They weren't very attractive at all physically. One was short and stocky, another short and lean and a third one who was tall with an average build. None were built very well as far as muscles go. But they all would have girls stop them on campus and ask to kiss them. I always just laughed at this because I found it hilarious. They weren't cocky, as much as they were confident. But by confident I mean they simply liked who they were. They were content and happy with themselves and it showed to everyone around them.

 Bingo.  Although a little cockiness doesn't hurt as long as you are not arrogant.  You have to be comfortable in you own skin.  Also, be willing to get outside of your comfort zone and take a risk (approaching).  The more you do it the less scary it will be, and the more confident you will become.  Confidence comes from competence, and competence comes from confidence. :shock: (beware circular reference)

QuoteAnd for the record, I don't find Han repulsive, simply amusing. I have no negative emotions towards him whatsoever

 I have heard this a million times from girls.  Usually 30 minutes before i get their phone # or take them home.  :D   Women hate to love me at first.

QuoteI think you have good tips, too, Hans Solo. But be careful to not become too metro-sexual ... I guess that relates to becoming wussy, though

 Right on.  If you are more feminine by nature dress a bit more macho (wear a wallet chain for example).  However, Tom Cruise doesn't have a metro sexual vibe in ToP Gun, and even though I dress nice my attitude is completely masculine.  

QuoteI'm surprised I haven't seen a lot about other womanly traits that can be very sexy, such as high intelligence, charisma, and so forth. There's only so much you can tolerate a lovely body and a lousy mind. There's got to be a balance there for anything long-term

 Great point!  If a women is an 8 in pure looks for example but has:

-Great witty sense of humor/style
-Smart as hell (I have a huge soft spot for intelligent women-probably because I am also smart)
-Adventurous (take it any way you want)
-loves to travel
-self confident

Then she will be a 10 in my book.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Novice on April 26, 2005, 14:25:19
Quotehave heard this a million times from girls. Usually 30 minutes before i get their phone # or take them home.  Women hate to love me at first.

Han, you kill me!  :lol: And I would just like to add, before you draw a connection of 'another notch in your belt' that I have NEVER given my phone number to a man who behaved this way. I may find it amusing and funny. But that's where it ends. I know very well what he wants and I have no interest in it. Doesn't mean I'm rude, simply confident in myself!  Right back at you!  :wink:
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on April 26, 2005, 14:30:48
You have to remember if you read all my post that I transition into a rapport stage (sounds structured but it is not-I just don't start off by TRYING for rapport-I assume it).  Then a lot of the cockiness fades away and I proceed to have Real conversation/connection.  I would get sick of myself If I was cocky every minute of the Day.

Hans Solo

BTW novice, are you adventurous?  Because if not I probably  wouldn't be that interested anyway! 8)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: redeemingspirit on April 26, 2005, 14:42:46
I for one, believe Han when he talks about his conquests.  My hallucination is that we're still transitioning - transforming from creatures that are hardwired to procreate to creatures that do not necessarily need to reproduce keep the species alive.

We have men becoming more feminine, and women becoming more masculine.  When a woman is approached by a man who is strongly masculine, which I percieve as being drastically different than the norm, there is a instinctual sexual attraction that allows men like Han to put another 'notch in the belt'.  Perhaps we are not meant to evolve beyond our masculine and feminine energies, and we need to return to these basic, primal values.  Then again, perhaps we can move beyond these instinctual drives and begin to present our sexual energies in a more asexual way.

I know there is much more passion (on both sides) when I TAKE my woman and RAVISH her, rather then seduce my wife and tenderly ensure her needs are met.  Is this better, or worse?  Who is to say - it's astounding that we can all experience such amazing depths and breadths of pleasure together.

Create a beautiful day for yourself,
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 26, 2005, 15:27:35
I also find Han extremely funny. Just not in the way where I am laughing with him ;)

"Conquests" "score card" LOL

Particularly hilarious, was the comment "if she's 8 in physical looks, but she's really intelligent, self confident and all the rest, she's a 10 in my book"
What she only gains 2 points for those? :lol:

You're extremely shallow, as in you lack depth, as 2D as a cardboard cut out, and that is why you're so funny ;)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on April 26, 2005, 15:28:25
QuoteThen again, perhaps we can move beyond these instinctual drives and begin to present our sexual energies in a more asexual way.

I don't know about you, but I hope our species never become asexual.  i think of the act of making love is a spiritual endeavor.  Also,  What is with all this notch in the belt stuff.  What I am talking about is the ability to attract the opposite sex, and for men to stop taking whatever falls in their lap and CHOOSE to attract the women they desire/want to connect with. Women have been taught this stuff in Cosmo, talking with their friends,etc.  Mens shy away and assume they know how to attract the opposite sex.  Well, there are a lot of men out their that if they could put their ego aside, and learn from the successful, would fair a lot better with the "fairer" sex.

QuoteWe have men becoming more feminine, and women becoming more masculine. When a woman is approached by a man who is strongly masculine, which I perceive as being drastically different than the norm, there is a instinctual sexual attraction that allows men like Han to put another 'notch in the belt'

Very true, but men are not men anymore because of society (most Tv, Movies, etc).  The masculine energy in the yin to the woman's yang.  On an instinctual level it is very attractive.  

QuoteI know there is much more passion (on both sides) when I TAKE my woman and RAVISH her, rather then seduce my wife and tenderly ensure her needs are met. Is this better, or worse? Who is to say - it's astounding that we can all experience such amazing depths and breadths of pleasure together

 Of course this is good.  It is only the women's movement that says all sex with a man is Rape.  That is crap.  As long as both of you receive tremendous amounts of joy from sharing such an intimate act, then all is well. The ravishing you are talking about is just the ability to let go and experience each other on a primal level with out ego and societal influences getting in the way.

If you want a very good description of this read David Daeda "The way of the Superior Man"  it is kind of a spiritual interpretation of what is magnetic in a man.

Hans Solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: mactombs on April 26, 2005, 16:44:17
QuoteGreat point! If a women is an 8 in pure looks for example but has:

-Great witty sense of humor/style
-Smart as hell (I have a huge soft spot for intelligent women-probably because I am also smart)
-Adventurous (take it any way you want)
-loves to travel
-self confident

Then she will be a 10 in my book.

Yes, I always suspected I had a "12", but it was difficult to quantify before now.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 26, 2005, 17:38:52
You guys are speaking to much in body. I think that if a girl its physically normal - maybe just a little pretty (nice eyes for example- i love the eyes) and if the body its normal (and that can be as much normal as possible), and if she has a great personality, that will be amazing for a great relationship.

If i am seeking for sex or a date i will seek hot girls, otherwise, if i am searching for someone to be me GF, i will look into personality too. Body will be important in the way that i love womens with a pretty face...but if she is not a great person i will not give her a chance. So, in my life, i will give importance for both body and mind. Its a lie when people say that body its not important.

if so, women all over the planet would get in love by Dalai Lama and men by Mother Theresa (althought they have/had pretty faces in their own way- not sexually).

Novice, if Tom Cruise/Brad Pitt are average, i will get scared ´cause that means that you want better! What can be better than those guys? Give me an example...(you cannot say my name..i am too damn beautiful for you:-)).

Novice, being cocky, in Hans SOlo view and mine, must include funny- its called the cocky-funny aproach (David Deangelo). When you act that way you are funny to the women. My experiences shows me very good results. I dont know how do you see a cocky-funny guy, but with me i act in a very funny way being playful with the girl, sometimes in an almost childish way and they love it.

YOu are just being funny with her and nothing more, and you pretend to be cocky but thats clearly faked, just for the fun..and she will know that (unless you are dealing with 10s girls that for some reason are arrogant...in that case you need to be cocky-funny but no so childish and near arrogance).

For example, i can love to whisper things to the ear of the girl and say "Give me 20$ and i will give you a kiss"- if she denies i will pretend to be mad with that and will attack by tickling her....that way we will be palying with each others and be laughing and having lots of fun...of course that the words i said above are just an example.

I dont use pickup-lines (sometimes may be useful) or pre-invented sentences. No, i just feel myself funny and playfull and will transmit that (with body language, words, actions..) to the women. As you see, there are not techniques, just a way to act and be yourself.

You may still argue that we are faking, but thats a lie (at least with me). Let me show you how: when younger, due to my past/social believes,etc,etc, i was very shy and would really never (but never really) get anuthing with a women (even if i was a sensible guy). I was depressed ´cause i didnt have a GF and that would cause me to do not have any GF that would make me become depressed and so on. After finishing with that cycle and realise things that Hans Solo or Dave (the guy that wrote great books about seduction) said, my life just changed.

Now that i am not shy and i am very playful with women and funny, i am not feeling like faking...i feel the opposite, i feel like if i have released myself. Its a freedom of the mind and the spirit. I feel very well and very confortable with that, its my real nature coming back. When younger- when i look back- i i see that as being faking or forcing something thats not natural. If wasnt for the stupid society (that creates depressive wussy guys like i was) we all would be much more masculine, palyful and funny to girls. Our real nature its that one, and guys like Dave (DAvid Deangelo) or Hans SOlo, are just teaching back that again to people.


HANS SOLO, what technique is that one that you spoke about G spot? It seem s that you are not talkking about clitoris only...you spoke about something different...sorry for being so dumb but i like to know more! ;-)
btw, do u have an email?!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on April 26, 2005, 17:58:06
it is all in an ebook by a guy named David Shade.  You can get it here:

http://www.masterful-lover.com/manual.html

I have read many books, and seen videos on sex, and this is the best.

Although, he gets kinda crazy in certain parts with his hypnosis.  For instance, his girlfriend wanted him to hypnotize her so he can make her orgasm on command.  I have never done this, however he knows of a special spot called the Deep Spot.

If you want to learn about the G spot do a search on Amazon.com

Hans Solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Novice on April 26, 2005, 18:22:43
Oh Hans, I am quite certain you would find me EXTREMELY boring! I am not 'in to sex' anywhere near your level of association/fascination. I have no doubt you would be a funny friend. But nothing you have described would make me the least bit attracted to you in a physical way. Just as I'm sure nothing I've described would make you find me attractive at all. Thus, the whole reason for my posting on this thread. There isn't a 'one size fits all' concept with women, which is what you seem to be expounding. I am here only to post a contrary viewpoint.

It sounds to me like you have exactly the right tactics down for some fantastic physical relationships. And if that's your goal, there's nothing wrong with what you are describing. If the women are willing participants -- that's great for you both!

My only point is that not all women are looking for that and thus not all women will fall for this stuff.

QuoteNovice, if Tom Cruise/Brad Pitt are average, i will get scared ´cause that means that you want better! What can be better than those guys? Give me an example...(you cannot say my name..i am too damn beautiful for you:-)).

Ha ha ha.... good question. I'm not really attracted to the 'typical' female hearthrobs though. So, as I've mentioned before, don't take my word on personal preferences for the average woman's perspective. I am not the average woman (and that is not meant as a slight either way). I'm not in to shopping (not even for shoes), I don't get manicures/pedicures/facials, I rarely wear make-up (and when I do its only a little blush). I would describe myself as a very natural, down to earth person. So please keep that in mind when considering my opinion, I readily admit that my tastes differ greatly from most women.

Hmm...let me see. I think Sean Connery is physically attractive, but I would never go out with him because I don't think he is trust-worthy in a relationship. I think Denzel Washington is also very attractive. Mel Gibson is another one. And yes Mel is a HUGE flirt, with a great sense of humor and an equally great body. Denzel also has the looks and body. But both have been married to their wives for more years than they've been famous. They are both very private people, but very loyal to their family, and those traits are what I find attractive in them.

I'm not sure of his name, but I find the character of Sayyid on the US TV show LOST very attractive. I've never read/seen an interview on him so I don't know what he is like in person. But his physical body combined with the character of Sayyid I find attractive. (and the fact that he finds Shannon attractive in the plot I think is ridiculous, but that's besides the point).

Can't think of too many other famous men that I would say I find attractive. But keep in mind, there are many women people drop jaws at that I don't find the least attractive either (Pamela Anderson and Angelina Jolie are two that top my gag list). I do think Catherine Zita-Jones is very attractive as well Meg Ryan. But again, what I call attractive isn't restricted to physical senses. To me a person's character is really what sells it for me.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on April 26, 2005, 18:53:07
QuoteOh Hans, I am ... EXTREMELY boring! I am not 'in to sex'

That is boring!  Oh, come on...that's no way to talk about yourself.  Does somebody need a hug? (btw, did you like my newspaper style quote) :P

QuoteHa ha ha.... good question. I'm not really attracted to the 'typical' female hearthrobs though

Ummm.......lets see:

Sean Connery (You mean James Bond)
Mel Gibson (Braveheart)
Denzel Washington (extreme heart throb)

WOW!  you make a great case!  Good thing you aren't representing Micheal Jackson! :D


* Oh come on..leave luscious lips, Angelina Jolie, off your silly little list.

With Love
Hans Solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 26, 2005, 19:03:21
Damn! i made a post and deleted by accident...Grrrrr!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Novice on April 26, 2005, 19:17:51
My dear Hans, very clever newspaper style quotes. And talking about lawyers...The way you selected the text you chose to quote does not relay what I wrote originally but rather what you wanted to see -- how very lawyer-ish of you!  :wink:

I never said I was EXTREMELY boring. On the contrary, I am one of those people very happy and confident in who and what I am. But we were speaking in hypothetical terms (if I were single in a bar and you approached me as you've described, would I give you my phone number and/or would you find me attractive). The answer to that scenario is I do not believe you would find me attractive. That doesn't mean no one else does or that I believe myself to be unattractive. So thank you for the offer, but I don't need a hug.

QuoteSean Connery (You mean James Bond)
Mel Gibson (Braveheart)
Denzel Washington (extreme heart throb)

WOW! you make a great case! Good thing you aren't representing Micheal Jackson!  

Again, you cleverly took what you proved your point, but ignored what I wrote that doesn't agree with it.

I also said I would never go out with Connery. And I caveated that both Denzel and Mel are physically attractive, which is what I believe most women focus on. However, I specifically said that isn't what I personally find attractive in them.

And let's face it, I need to give examples of famous people for reference, otherwise you wouldn't know who I was describing. And most actors have some sort of fan following. So yes, the famous people I list will have women followers, but I don't believe (and I could be wrong in this) that what I list as finding attractive in them, is what the majority of women would agree with.

So, is that a bit more clear in my selection?  :P

Oh, and lastly, almost all of the remaining famous "heart throbs" don't do anything for me. Which is why my list is quite small. Sorry!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 27, 2005, 17:51:17
I am not gay but i must admit that:
Mel Gibson its very funny (in some movies)

and Sean Connor its the most charismatic (not speaking in sexual charism) persons that i ever saw on movies. Its amazing the way he speaks.

If i could choose a body from the hollwyood actors, i think that it would be from Dolph Lundrgen (i dont have any idea how to spell or write his name!). Its the actor that you found in Rocky IV(i think that its the fourth, the blond guy). He has an amazing body...with that body wow! no one would ever robber me! lol!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on April 29, 2005, 18:41:46
Ok here is another tip-


 I went out this past Thursday night and some interesting things happened.  First, a bartender that works at one of the bars on the weekends was off and just socializing at the bar I was at.  She approached me and asked if I was (insert my last name).  So we hit it off and I am excited to see her tonight at the bar.  
8)
Anyway, she left the bar and I was just hanging out with some friends and they wanted to approach a group of girls.  So, I tell them some girls are eying us and we approach.  

When I got close to the girls one of them says to me "I know you from somewhere" (heard that one before!).  Anyway, the good looking friend says to the friend that just said that "He's hot how do you guys know each other".  I say that I don't think we do and start flirting a little (Hold on I am going to make a point.)  This girl had a tattoo of a star on her wrist that was really faint, kind of like a bar stamp.  So, not thinking and trying to be funny I said "You must of really liked getting into the bars when you were young to get a tattoo of a bar stamp".  Her whole attitude change and she became ticked!  Not only was my comment not funny, but I guess the tattoo meant something to her, although she wouldn't say.  
The result:

She told her friend what I said and her friend became ticked too!  So she flagrantly gives me the middle finger right in my face and just holds it there.  HOW EMBARRASSING, HA!  I just laughed (not in a mean way-more in a way that said "well that didn't work" and left). :oops:

After thinking about why things went wrong I concluded this:  After my initial "conquest" I only viewed this girl as an amusement and she could feel my energy/demeanor.  My usual playfulness was more like a slap in the face to her, and in no way was she in my bubble.  I guess what I am saying is that when I usually do this there is a "heart connection" between us and the women knows I am only flirting. Thus, it usually results in playful conversation.  

Anyway, I wrote this because I think guys don't approach women because something like this may happen to them.  Well, It could.  However, I am alright today and I learned a lot from this interaction.  I will be better off for it because my ego has been "put in place" and therefore I will be EVEN MORE ATTRACTIVE.  Ah HA Ah! (notice my frame is always positive).  Don't let a bad interaction get you down.
:P
I learned my lesson-on to the next one :wink:

Hans Solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: FEMMSTARR on April 30, 2005, 02:56:43
Quote from: NayAt first I thought this was a joke [:P]  But you're serious aren't you?

Why can't I guy just be himself, instead of acting like something he isn't?  Eventually his true self is going to come through, especially when he gets tired of playing a role..[;)] and then what will he be left with?  a ticked off girl that's what! [:D]

Nay [^]

I thought the whole thing was ridiculous myself
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: FEMMSTARR on April 30, 2005, 03:00:04
Quote from: Hans Solo.  

When I got close to the girls one of them says to me "I know you from somewhere" (heard that one before!).  Anyway, the good looking friend says to the friend that just said that "He's hot how do you guys know each other".  I say that I don't think we do and start flirting a little (Hold on I am going to make a point.)  This girl had a tattoo of a star on her wrist that was really faint, kind of like a bar stamp.  So, not thinking and trying to be funny I said "You must of really liked getting into the bars when you were young to get a tattoo of a bar stamp".  Her whole attitude change and she became ticked!  Not only was my comment not funny, but I guess the tattoo meant something to her, although she wouldn't say.  

Hans Solo

she probably thought you were calling her a bar fly or club slut whatever they are calling it these days
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: data on April 30, 2005, 08:38:58
Hans, it is interesting this experience happens to you within the time frame of this thread ;)

You're being told something about women in general, that is there is more depth to them than you thought. Now, the woman you approached, sounded like they were on a hunt of their own, but evidently it was more than just sex.

Now, suppose you could relate to them as souls, rather than just two bodies that came along, you could have still been playful with them, but your energy would have been more plea sent to them. At least you are showing them respect.

Now, the point I was making earlier, is if you can touch a woman at the level of her soul, it will leave an everlasting impression. Just take a slice of humble pie and inculcate this wisdom ;)

Now, suppose you had taken one of these women to bed that night and had sex with them. Do you think they would have remembered you anymore than their previous partners. You would just be another "conquest" on their list, an increment on the no of partners they have had.

However, suppose you did not just have sex with them, but made love to them, gave them immense pleasure, and truly touched them deep down. They will remember you - I assure you ;)

To turn this into a practical tip from your new guru: treat your woman, as you would want her to treat you :)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on April 30, 2005, 18:07:11
FEMMSTARR, loool! Its stupid but i like that "Warning dont read this".

Hans Solo, how do you think that you should act in the case that you described? Maybe you were to cocky and little funny. Sometimes i will make fun about my girl friends (not girlfriends) but i will just be teasing her. I will say things in a funny way with a smile that means: "i am playing with you". That smile will not transmit a "i need aproval" sensation.

In girls that you just met, making of them may sound too weird. Last weekend i did the same with a model and she got to nervous, lol! I did it just for the experience, just to learn something.

Ok, again, how should you act in a situation like that Hans?
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on May 03, 2005, 16:11:28
QuoteHans Solo, how do you think that you should act in the case that you described? Maybe you were to cocky and little funny. Sometimes i will make fun about my girl friends (not girlfriends) but i will just be teasing her. I will say things in a funny way with a smile that means: "i am playing with you". That smile will not transmit a "i need approval" sensation.

 Obviously more funny and not so cocky.  You just never know how they will respond.  However, I was amazing on Friday and Saturday night-learned my lesson from Thursday night.  I was in the "flow".  You see, I am good looking, and a great dresser, so I really have to walk a fine line and let the women know that I am joking and it HAS to be funny, or they think I am arrogant.  I never say "Just joking", but will imply it with a sly smile, or smirk.  The comment I made was not funny and it must of hit a chord with her.

FEMMSTAR-  With that name I can not understand why you think I am ridiculous, or this topic. :?



Use the force, feel the flow,

Hans Solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 03, 2005, 18:25:47
"Use the force, feel the flow"

lol! you can bet that when i feel like that things flow pretty well.

MEditation helps reaching that state, amonge other things, like NLP or hearing great techno/house/trance music.

thanks for the tips.

how its really our nick name on fastseduction11 forums?
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 04, 2005, 16:02:31
Suddenly, i remember about an interesting question for Hans and Frank:
1st- Hans do you pratice AP?

2nd: do you think that what you see and learn while APing can help you, in some manner with seduction? Maybe in AP you can learn something or see things in a differnt level so you act in a better way with women....what do you say about this idea?


thanks
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on May 04, 2005, 18:38:45
Yes I practice Ap.  This is not exactly the forum I would choose to talk about seduction, but since it was here i decided to respond.  However, I can not wait until Franks book comes out, and kick it into high gear.  Right now my success has been inconsistent.

Quote2nd: do you think that what you see and learn while APing can help you, in some manner with seduction? Maybe in AP you can learn something or see things in a different level so you act in a better way with women....what do you say about this idea?

May want to ask Frank about this.  His website states that AP can help you create your own reality.  BtW, How long do I have to wait for your book Frank?

Hans Solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Frank on May 04, 2005, 20:23:18
Hi guys:

Just catching up with the gossip and see the thread has expanded somewhat since my last post, lol.

Hans Solo: regarding creating your reality, you are already touching on many of the aspects already. Only you are looking at it more in an objective sense and specifically in the "dating" arena. Which is okay, but you can actually look at it from the other side, so to speak. You can develop the interactions and see them taking place within Focus 2 of consciousness, and then automatically insert these actions within the physical, or Focus 1.

This requires an extensive use of what we call imagination, although it is more than that, of course, but I'm just touching on the bare principles here.

Essentially, you lay out the probabilities within a certain region of Focus 2 of consciousness, and then you allow them to "replay" within Focus 1. In a sense, as I say, you are doing this already to a degree. But what you are doing is more physically oriented in that you are always seeing things from a physical perspective. You are using your imagination, of course, as your imagination is necessary for your creativity. But you can actually go to your imagination directly and insert the probabilities for the future actions you wish to come about.

In other words, you can actually stand in your imagination and create your own movie. Let's say it is a "chat up" scenario. You create the movie, so to speak, and record it in your imagination. Of course, in the movie everything works perfectly, then you place the intent for that scenario to come about. Practically, you will be doing this on an ongoing basis to give yourself the greatest chances. Problem is, in a sense, you are laying "probabilities" and they are by no means definites.

Contrary to what many mystics claim, the future is not written in stone. The future exists as a series of probabilities and, fortunately, they can be influenced with a little practice in the right area in consciousness. Your imagination is the very creative source of all your actions within Focus 1, i.e. the physical. If you cannot imagine it, then it cannot exist in the reality you create; as your imagination is the very source of what you create. People think the imagination is a mere mental faculty, nope, it is the very source of all you create. So to anyone following this, be very careful what you imagine!

There are many self-help courses that teach you to use your imagination to think of various scenarios to improve your physical life. But what many people do not realise is it is possible to actually project into your imagination area and not just create imaginary scenarios, but to actually live them as well, but live them within the area of your imagination.

Of course, your imagination can only create your reality. It cannot create the reality of another person. But there are subjective energy interactions that take place between us all, on an ongoing basis. Knowing about these energy interactions can make it a lot easier to get someone to mirror your expectations. Basically, you realise that you are actually communicating with a person on a subjective level also, so these probabilities can be accounted for.

The "dating game" is actually a hot-bed of subjective energy interaction and presents an ideal scenario to demonstrate the effectiveness of the kind of thing I talk about in the book.

Yours,
Frank
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: FEMMSTARR on May 05, 2005, 01:21:43
Quote from: Hans Solo
QuoteHans Solo, how do you think that you should act in the case that you described? Maybe you were to cocky and little funny. Sometimes i will make fun about my girl friends (not girlfriends) but i will just be teasing her. I will say things in a funny way with a smile that means: "i am playing with you". That smile will not transmit a "i need approval" sensation.

 Obviously more funny and not so cocky.  You just never know how they will respond.  However, I was amazing on Friday and Saturday night-learned my lesson from Thursday night.  I was in the "flow".  You see, I am good looking, and a great dresser, so I really have to walk a fine line and let the women know that I am joking and it HAS to be funny, or they think I am arrogant.  I never say "Just joking", but will imply it with a sly smile, or smirk.  The comment I made was not funny and it must of hit a chord with her.

FEMMSTAR-  With that name I can not understand why you think I am ridiculous, or this topic. :?



Use the force, feel the flow,

Hans Solo

it wasnt me that said you were cocky or arrogant so I am not sure what you are talking about

and the name I use is one I made up for yahoo I am female and my middle name is starr that is how I came up with it and also femm for feminist as I believe in equal rights for women
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Tom on May 05, 2005, 01:27:31
I don't know if it has been said yet or not, but I'm going to say it without going back over the previous pages to check: Everything you need to know about this can be gathered by asking yourself why there is no matching topic about seducing men.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: FEMMSTARR on May 05, 2005, 01:29:28
Quote from: TomI don't know if it has been said yet or not, but I'm going to say it without going back over the previous pages to check: Everything you need to know about this can be gathered by asking yourself why there is no matching topic about seducing men.

well now Tom you sound like a very smart man to me
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: FEMMSTARR on May 05, 2005, 01:38:07
Quote from: Major TomI won't post my pick-up technique here again. It's too embarasing.

However, it sounds to me that the eloborate theories on what attracts women only shows how little we know  :)

The little we do know is that like attracts like. We tend to like those who are most similar to us.

The rest is anatomy really  :)

Wonderful anatomy I might add.

yeah Tom all ya gotta do is take some time to get to know someone and the rest will happen naturally
I have never used a pick up line to get a man
my husband was my friend for a long time before we became lovers and that is how it happened
he didnt use a pick up line and neither did I
I imagine that is what is used for casual sex but I dont have casual sex it is not to my liking but all are different so I am not saying it is wrong just not for me
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on May 05, 2005, 15:52:56
Frank-

 When you say to create scenarios with women in focus 2, is this in the "astral"?  Because, to help myself in life I already use Silva Mind control and NLP to persuade my reality to turn out the way I want it to.  For instance, I will get into my "alpha state" (somewhere between focus 3-Focus 10) and use my imagination to create scenarios with women and how I would respond to them.  I also do this in my car to and from work.  I have elaborate conversations within these scenarios.  Is this what you are talking about, or are you taking this to the next level?

Also when I interact with women I will "rehearse" her reaction before I make a comment by focusing my intent on the response I want.  You would be surprised how often it works.  

So my question would be are you shaping your reality in much the same way as NLP and visualization, or is it more advanced by actually projecting into the astral and then playing out the scenarios?

Use the force, feel the flow,
Hans Solo

BTW, I CANT wait to get your book-I know you probably hear this alot but here goes: How Long?
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Novice on May 05, 2005, 15:58:53
I'm not a doctor of any sort, Hans, but your last post (coupled with all of your other posts) is beginning to hint a bit at obsession with women/sex.
I'm not passing judgement or anything, but this may not be the healthiest thing on which you focus so much of your time.

Just a thought!

(And I'm not saying this with any kind of sarcasm, simply being sincere)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on May 05, 2005, 16:04:17
No no-

I like to learn techniques on lots of things.  I am young, so women do occupy a lot of my time.  Also, I love to come to this website, but feel I am only qualified to talk about this subject.  However, I keep trying to get better at phasing so I can put my 2 cents in. :)

Hans Solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 05, 2005, 18:06:58
Quote from: TomI don't know if it has been said yet or not, but I'm going to say it without going back over the previous pages to check: Everything you need to know about this can be gathered by asking yourself why there is no matching topic about seducing men.

What do you mean by that? Do you think that women are better just because they can get a man easly?

Let me tell you: men needs to learn these s*** because our society transformed the image of The Man, the masculinity, into an image of a wussy b*****, than it is always begging for love. We forgot our true nature adn we are learning it again.

Secondly, why the hell women insist in attacking men? Femmstarr, why do you say that he is a smart men? I mean, women are always attacking men like this, with small things that have the intention of destroy man ego. I dont understand (and its not only you) why do you(women) make such attacks, its boring. I just know 3 types of women:
1) the victim, the real victim like women in country where they dont have any rights.

2) the kind of women that thinks that every women its a victim and men are the guilty for that (all the men). This kind of women (at least 50%-70% of the girls that i see...) treat men like dogs but in a very subtle way.

3) the normal kind of women (very rare)that are normal. The admit that some women are victims, some men are guilty, but sometimes you will find the opposite. They treat men like humans.

Another reason that makes men needing such techniques (besides depressions, "wussification" of society, etc) its the fact that the western world its constituded in large scale by 2) type of women: the real b****. This kind of women just love to destroy the go of a men because to them, they are the guilty for everything....

For example, today i was kiding with a firend. Believe when i say that i was making an innocent things with her, just playing with her a little (and i did the same thing exactly many times with other womens). Without no reason she said something very bad to me in front of other people. lol! She didnt realise of course that she was in my reality...my answer was good: i reacted like if shw as done nothing and i treated her very well after that. Of course that in the end, she was the one becoming embarassed...play with fire and you will burn.

This is a smal example that i found just today about how b*** women can be. In the above situation she just didnt need to do that. Body language could show that she didnt want nothing with me; she could say in a nice way (afterall i was being nice and playful with her), but her answer was an agressive one.

I saw many women acting like that (not only with me but with other guys) but the opposite i must admit: i never saw a men treating a women like that.

hope that now you can see why men need this kind of stuff...
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Tom on May 05, 2005, 23:39:34
Kazbadan-

It isn't a question of who is better (men or women). As long as you are limiting this to heterosexual relationships, both are equally required. You did not answer my question: Why do you think it is that there is nothing about women seducing men?
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: FEMMSTARR on May 06, 2005, 01:23:08
Secondly, why the hell women insist in attacking men? Femmstarr, why do you say that he is a smart men?


I am saying he realizes it can happen naturally very easily

I do not hate men I love them and I dont attack them

????????????

I dont know where you got that idea

have you been drinking?
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Frank on May 06, 2005, 03:34:24
Hans Solo:

The book is about 2 months away at least. I thought it would be long finished by now, but everything else in my life has been taking 4 or 5 times longer than I thought recently. It has just been one of those times, a case of too much to do and so little time. But I am grateful for your interest and thank you for your kind comments.

As to the actual technique, there are two factors 1) the laying of the probabilities within Focus 2 of consciousness and, 2) the subjective energy interaction with the individual, in this case the woman.

What you are actually trying to create in this instance (and all good communication is based on this) is a positive, subjective energy interaction. And the difficulty with the "chat up" scenario, which is why it is such a great demonstration, is you need to create that positive subjective energy interaction right from the word go. Now that is one heck of a tricky thing to do. Some people have a natural knack of doing that and they usually become very successful people.

The laying of the probabilities is a step onwards from what you are doing now. What you do is actually project into the area of mind known as your imagination. You are actually there, within your imagination, watching the whole scenario take place as you create it. Doing it this way is far more lifelike and hence more effective than sitting in the physical and creating it by thinking about it from the physical.

In a way, what you create for yourself is a very controlled "dream" though I hesitate to use that term as there are so many other belief constructs attached to the word "dream" that do not relate to what I am saying, and dreaming takes place in a slightly different way. I want to make that clear otherwise, people will start to think that imagination is the same as dreaming, which it isn't. Same area in consciousness but it's a different action.

The subjective energy interaction is a very tricky one because you have to hold what is known as an F1/F2 overlay experience. If you get it right, as you communicate, you will actually be "fed" with exactly what to say from an aspect of your self within your Focus 2 of consciousness, that you have set up for that purpose.

Again, you will be doing a similar thing now, but what I do for you is lay out the actual energy interaction structure for you so you understand the process more fully. Many of these NLP-style courses lay out certain techniques for you to follow. But what I do is lay out the actual structure in consciousness and show you the communication paths. In other words, in your case you will realise exactly why techniques such as NLP do work to an extent. But then once you know the structure you'll be free to experiment way beyond the limitations of an objective NLP-type structure. You can just get right to the subjective.

If you had that subjective communication absolutely locked in from the word go, you could approach a woman and she would be open to you immediately, without you actually having said anything. You see, 90% of it is the subjective energy interaction. She needs to open up on the subjective level. At first, however, the communication is perhaps 10% subjective and 90% objective. This is a very uncomfortable way for people to communicate!

So what you are trying to do is work on her so she opens up subjectively from using objective techniques, such as NLP. I know a bit about NLP as I was a fan of Dr Richard Bandler in the early '90s. But once you know the structure you can, with some practice, simply open on a subjective level. Good friends, for example, when they meet each other immediately lock in on a subjective level. So somehow, you have to duplicate that.

If you get this right, and it is a very tricky thing to do but someone such as yourself would enjoy practising, when she talks to you, she'll feel like she has known you for ages and she'll get confused because you just met. But that's because you are both open on a subjective level. So when you look into her eyes she'll feel that you are looking deep into her soul, and that kind of thing. Her yellow energy centre will be giving her these gooey tingling feelings in her belly and her eyes will soften and sparkle, her lips will deepen in colour and become fuller and her face will flush slightly.

Okay, you are not going to be able to score a hit every time. Because it is, after all, an interaction. When energy interacts, there is always distortion in translation of one kind or another. But as you know, you don't have to get it right all the time. If you scored a bulls-eye even only 20% of the time, you'd be on a roll.

Yours,
Frank
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: FEMMSTARR on May 06, 2005, 04:44:50
you dont need some kind of plan or scheme to get close to a woman

just be yourself,  be honest,  and one thing that all women find attractive in a man is  compassion for others

I like a man with character that loves and respects women rather than treating them like property or trash

if you  show a woman respect and you are an honest man with character you wont have any problems

and this really goes for people in general because I see lots of  women being users and abusers as well as men
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Frank on May 06, 2005, 10:38:11
Femmstarr:

It's all very well saying be yourself, but a person's outward expression is a dynamic entity. Although people are free to think otherwise and fix themselves to a limited range of expressions if they wish. Doing such is entirely their prerogative, of course. But if I had taken that attitude all along, I'd still be that shy, spotty, 10-stone dyslexic wimp with no social life.

Yours,
Frank
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on May 06, 2005, 16:19:41
Frank-

Thank you for your reply.  No wonder your book is taking so long.  Your post was like a novel!   A good one. :lol:

I really appreciate you writing it. I know that old friends connection you are talking about and always try and duplicate that feeling in an interaction.  I also experience something like a mild F1/F2 overlay (or the channel for another 'self') in an interaction, I call it the "FLOW".  It actually feels like there is electricity, or "magic", in the air and the whole interaction feels trance-like (almost nothing can go wrong when I am in this state).  It is similar to the bubble, as you talked about  in one of your previous post. If you can show me how to achieve the REAL F1/F2 overlay I will be in your debt forever, Master Yoda. I will be INVINCIBLE!!!!  I am excited to hear about the laying groundwork in F2 to shape your physical reality-that is right up my alley.  

Also, I am relieved to hear that your book is only 2 months away.  I thought you were going to break my heart and say something like 9 months to a year. :wink:  I will be the first in line to purchase your book.  

Femmstar:  I was just joking in my previous post :lol: Although, saying to someone be yourself is usually some of the worst advice you can give to a man.  Especially one who is bad with women.  Most men only use a fragment of their total "self/personality" and choose to stay within those boundaries.  What I am saying is to grow and exercise sides of your personality you may not use as much, until they become a part of you.  It is akin to getting comfortable in different focus states.  The more you do it the more comfortable you will be in those states, and the more dynamic things you can do with these states.  In both cases you become a more dynamic person.

Tom-
QuoteWhy do you think it is that there is nothing about women seducing men?

LOL!  There is SO much out there on this it that the stuff.  Numerous books, for example: "THE RULES", Cosmo/Seventeen,etc.  Plus, girls talk about this stuff with one another.  Whenever men talk about this topic it consist of them mostly bragging/lying.

BTW, a women always walks away from an interaction from me THINKING she seduced me. :wink:

Use the force, feel the flow,

Hans Solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Souljah333 on May 20, 2005, 14:51:52
HEY HOW COME IT SEEMS LIKE ONLY MY POST ARE DISAPPEARING!?!
:evil:
this is the craziest thread...it's BS!

and again TOM...I LOVE YOU!!!
(wish there was a suitable emoticon for that).

as long as y'all are looking for T&A (which I'm sure you are), you're screwed, or "not screwed" depending :wink: . let us not forget the 6th sense! women know when they're being played, they only go along with it if they themselves want something (even the most f*cked up/needy & victimized of us)...and what the hell is "normal"...who are you to categorize women into 3 types?!?
(victims/bitches & normal)...if you can't find a meaningful relationship with a woman...no wonder.  stop putting so much energy into us as separate, and work on yourself more...or maybe less, like femmstarr said just be yourself.

personally i prefer shy, spotty, 10-stone dyslexic wimps to arrogant, self-righteous, omnipotent, megalomaniacs (not that i'm saying that's what "you" are) :twisted:.  as far as women walking away thinking they've played you (hans) doesn't matter does it...if that's what they believe.  :wink:

still waiting for an intelligent MALE reply to TOMS question...
Quotewhy there is no matching topic about seducing men

333
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Souljah333 on May 20, 2005, 14:55:20
FEMMSTARR     
PostPosted: Fri May 20, 2005 5:18 am    Post subject:  
Frank wrote:
Femmstarr:

QuoteIt's all very well saying be yourself, but a person's outward expression is a dynamic entity. Although people are free to think otherwise and fix themselves to a limited range of expressions if they wish. Doing such is entirely their prerogative, of course. But if I had taken that attitude all along, I'd still be that shy, spotty, 10-stone dyslexic wimp with no social life.

Yours,
Frank

awwww that is too bad but just forget about the be yourself and look at the other things I posted
a man with character....and compassion.....honest and hard working.... all of these things are very attractive in a person male or female.

REPOSTING FEMMSTARR'S AS WELL (which mysteriously disappeared as well)?!? :?
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 23, 2005, 14:59:59
Souljah, i dont know what are you refering to, about the missing posts, but i bet thats due to a problem occured some time ago, because of the MAin Computer (server) that controls APs forum.

Second, i would like to ear your answer to toms question, but mine its very easy: women dont need that "manual" (on how to lead with men) because body its all that counts to man (and to women to...at least 40-50%).

We are animals...dont forget that, when we accept sex in our lifes we accepting something conected to our primal instincts. "love" between a man and a women its much more near that "animal" part of us than the spiritual part of our lives. In the times that i have a lucid mind, filled with compassion and love (love, even for the one that hate me) i feel no need for a women.

When i am not in that way (most of the time) i will feel the need of: sex or female company. I feel need for sex f i am energetic and i feel the need of a female company when i am tired (sad i mean) or near depressed states. So, when i am in my best state of mind, "love" (that love, between two humans) its unuseful.

When i am in a bad mood, i will feel the need of another human (women company). If i am in a intermediary state i will maybe need sex sometimes and some company other times.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Souljah333 on May 23, 2005, 21:51:17
dear cocky-funny guy,

i wrote three different posts and trashed them all. what's the point?!? keep trying to better yourself, and trying to figure it out. best of luck!
that point that i think you might be missing with the "sean connery" type, which by the way i would roll over and bark like a dog for...among many other things!!! :twisted: is that "these" type of men exude a terrible amount of charisma...so if you want to play the big leagues...i suggest you start there. CHARISMA! secondly they have SUBSTANCE! it's not bullsh*t, it's not a game, it's not a song and dance...and the secret to what you are seeking is within this understanding. they make it look easy, they CAN BE COCKY, bcuz they have everything down-pat. they are in fact overly feminine by nature. too masculine is not cool...to macho and you're just another assh0le. these guys (that all guys admire) have a deep appreciation and respect for women as things to be worshiped. the fine line between being a lover and a father figure. sure we like to be protected, and play rough now and then, but you're not going to get to that point until you first learn to appreciate ALL women in total. understand the core of the entity. you must honestly be able to find beauty in all women...even the fattest, ugliest, most revolting, toothless, fishmonger you come across...you must look into her heart and understand the beauty and wisdom that lies there. these are the men that have the most rewarding experiences with women, bcuz all of it is sacred. otherwise you're just a pig that wants to get laid...and in that case as i said before, there are rows on rows of nasty ho's to fulfill those desires.

moths are drawn to the flame. if you are not brilliantly secure in yourself and genuine then they will be drawn to the next brightest flame. all women are on a mission for purity and strength of heart. don't think bcuz they get a little tipsy once in awhile...that it's wise to get in their way with a cheap come on, or half-assed proposition.

you have to find your own mojo and use it wisely.
333
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: G3MM4 on May 24, 2005, 00:11:14
Quote from: rhinegirl<blockquote id="quote"><font size="1" face="Arial" id="quote">quote:<hr height="1" noshade id="quote">Originally posted by MJ-12

Good point. Being an alpha male means you have to put up with alpha females! [:P]
<hr height="1" noshade id="quote"></blockquote id="quote"></font id="quote">

I'm an alpha female but I don't like alpha males because most are arrogant to a fault and often are insecure children when all is said and done. I like a small men who is confident and knows how to submit.

Jessica

Could say the same about some or most alpha females too... :p
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Tom on May 24, 2005, 01:01:43
When my wife and I met, neither of us was looking for a relationship to be in. We agreed later on that this was an important factor.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 24, 2005, 05:27:52
Quote from: Souljah333dear cocky-funny guy,

CHARISMA! secondly they have SUBSTANCE!

Charisma anyone can have it...even a bad murdering guy...i developed a lot of my charisma.

it's not bullsh*t, it's not a game, it's not a song and dance...and the secret to what you are seeking is within this understanding. they make it look easy, they CAN BE COCKY, bcuz they have everything down-pat. they are in fact overly feminine by nature.

Wrong....they are everything less feminine. The best natural guys that i met, and that are really good with women are even better than Sean Connor & company....they are everything but not feminine. They are not macho-man guys, they just know how to be a man. Feminine men dont get laid....women will always seem them just as the "nice friend".

too masculine is not cool...to macho and you're just another assh0le. these guys (that all guys admire) have a deep appreciation and respect for women as things to be worshiped.

Are you kiding me?!! Women are to be apreciated? And man are to be what? The slaves kissing their feet? Please...i only aprreciate what respects me.  Women are not godess to be admired. I respect women, and i respect them the way they respect me. THe last time i worshiped a women she saw me like a wussy boy and my chances with her dropped near zero. Since i stoped my "worship" to women that its far away much more easy to get sex, love, whatever. I can give a cumpliment to a women, admire her from times to times but thats all.  

you must honestly be able to find beauty in all women...even the fattest, ugliest, most revolting, toothless, fishmonger you come across...you must look into her heart and understand the beauty and wisdom that lies there.

looool! And you believe that you (women) do the same with men...so many women that i know that dont respect ugly guys....but (i hope that what i am gonna say nect makes you happy) i really try to love every human/conscious beings....not only ugly women. I must love all or not love anyone.

these are the men that have the most rewarding experiences with women, bcuz all of it is sacred. otherwise you're just a pig that wants to get laid...and in that case as i said before, there are rows on rows of nasty ho's to fulfill those desires.

sacred stuff sounds me to much to DaVinci Code bullshits. Why should women be sacred and admired but not men too?  both or nothing. If it happens to, by any chance, i get in love with someone, i will respect that in a very spiritual way. To me, sacred love its for all the relation, not only to women, as DaVinci Code says. Women worth so much as men and vice-versa.


moths are drawn to the flame. if you are not brilliantly secure in yourself and genuine then they will be drawn to the next brightest flame. all women are on a mission for purity and strength of heart. don't think bcuz they get a little tipsy once in awhile...that it's wise to get in their way with a cheap come on, or half-assed proposition.

All women in a mission for purity?!?!? JESUS!! I know really thousands of women that dont give a s*** for purification! They are really craps! TO be honest, i dont know any women in my personal life (neither men) that are in such mission.

What i wanna tell you its this: you are giving to much spiritual meaning to something that includes a lot of animal laws. Of course that there is some spirituality, but for the most part we are playing a game of the cat and the rat. So easy like that. And those men that you speak about, they dont have ugly women with a spiritual aura you know? Those brave men that admire women, for some "strange" reason are always eating the best looking women outthere.

Understand that we are animals. If you, later on, give a spiritual meaning to your relation, thats another thing, but for themost part of humans that i know, relations start with that "dance", like animals.

Do you know that the ugliest guys that i know rarely touch in women? For some strange reason some bastard guys that i know, that are very well good looking and have charisma, have all the women they want, and those women are not empty bottles They are nice, friendly and inteligent, btu they still get atracted to such guys  (that dont give any importance to spirituality and they dont admire women). I deal with real facts, not with fantasies.

Since i started to give more attention to such "dance" theory that i started to get more girls (not that much, but more) and more quality. When i look back to my life, in thetimes that i was spiritual and respected women what i see its a past with zero women. A past with really great women falling in love with bastard guys with no respect for people. Nice boys dont get laid...bad boys get laid because they have something that even themselves dont see. They are playing the game in the right way (almost).
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Souljah333 on May 24, 2005, 20:37:54
well........that's something to bite into and chew on awhile.

okay, it's very clear to me now that you just want to get laid, and there's nothing wrong with that, and i suppose i took it a few steps further, bcuz it's a post @ AP and i tend to wax spiritual. flog me!
anyway...first i would like to make it perfectly clear that some women are complete & total bitches. YES, and they can be cruel and heartless and shallow and empty and vile...just like guys can. and if you want to get laid then you're subject to the primitive. it's all very much alpha...and if you don't have what it takes then you're a loser!!! (personally i tend to avoid that system). you're conversing with someone that's been celibate for 8 years...so my perspective is twisted in comparison to yours.
i am however a severely sensual person/woman and so i understand the passion that rages in your loins :wink: (kidding)...i do understand how difficult it can be to feel something very passionately and not have avenues to express it with abandon.

as far as men being feminine...i didn't mean flaming fairy...i meant something deeper. if a man that was 100% masculine, and a woman that was 100% feminine tried to have sex with one another...the man would destroy the woman. pulverize her to death. which some people are into but...there is no such thing EVER as 100% one or the other. sorry.
a man that can find in himself and embrace his feminine nature is going to fair much better in anything he attempts, as will a woman that embraces her masculine nature. it makes us more whole and makes for better relationships overall. there's another "whole" path called the "sisterhood" that make women better as well and i will you give some extremely sage advice here (knowing full well you will not like it or appreciate it, but...) you would be very wise in the future (bcuz i know currently you're only seeking a little pie)...to avoid women that hate other women!!!
i don't think that needs explaining.

and last but never least....worshiping women. yes. i was appalled by your reaction. (not really it was quite typical...but i might as well hold my ground)...throughout history women have performed to much higher standards than men...they bare children for god's sake!!! they care and nurture and feed and nurse and heal and tend to those children as well. they teach and guide and pass on stories and legends and songs. they pass on knowledge of sacred things...plants, herbs, nature worship, elemental worship, magic and mysticism. men? men hunted, fought, and scratched their balls a lot :? no...men have accomplished some great feats, buts that's only bcuz they were raised and taken care of by good women that allowed them the time and comfort and support to be brilliant.

there's no point going on with this. if you want to get laid by super-fine chicks...look no further than the back of your comic book. lift weights, get a tan, buy some funky clothes, get a prince albert, and a handful of "X" and go to town. oh.............and you'll need a fly ride and lots of cash! :D

someday something is going to click back into place...an alignment in the wiring and women will step back into their rightful place as goddesses and warriors and take the sh*t back!!! men who prove themselves worthy of intelligence, respect and usefulness will find themselves in very comfortable positions :wink: free to invent, create and explore to their hearts content and the rest will be our pathetic slaves! :twisted: god i hope that happens in my life time!

333

and PS...DON'T BASH DA VINCI!!!!!!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Frank on May 24, 2005, 21:23:44
Hi:

If a woman is happy with a 10st dyslexic wimp then good luck to her. I set my sights higher, and for that I needed to create qualities in myself that the really good-looking, smart and intelligent women see in a man.

When I was younger I had a taste for really good-looking women. It all started from when I was 13 and had a paper-round in the morning. I used to turn to page 3 of the Sun Newspaper each morning and look at the half-naked woman presented there. I used to dream that one day I'd have a girlfriend who looked like that. A stunning looking model, someone incredibly attractive. Well, I eventually dated and had some great longer-term relationships with a number of such women. Had the time of my life, in fact, and I wouldn't swap the experiences for anything.

If people have different priorities then that's their prerogative. One poster was saying about how they liked a man who would "submit". Hmm, I think I don't actually know what the word submit means. :)

Yours,
Frank
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 25, 2005, 05:19:34
It depends on the submission Frank.....a girl dressed in black coat cloths, in high heels and with a whip on her hand can be a great way for one to submit to a girl :)

Souljah i understand your point. Indeed i just want to get laid i think. I feel better if i have no one in my life. When i raise my energy on my need for a person in my life disapears.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Souljah333 on May 25, 2005, 07:49:07
i have/had the same problem. i didn't learn sh*t from my parents as far as healthy relationships go. i was 9 when my parents split up. my father ignored me and my mom had a different boyfriend for every day of the week (all a bunch of sleazy low-life's). i fought with my mother day and night/24-7 till i left home when i 16, but i was addicted to the drama by then. i sought out father-figures or men with an "edge" (self-absorbed & too hot to handle). i loved the challenge i guess. i've never in my life had a relationship that lasted more than three months, and out of all of them...there was only one guy that i actually wanted to date. the rest were more of a stalking situation that i gave into too easily...for reasons of attention. every time i was dating someone i felt like i was in some great competition. i guess bcuz i knew they were all doomed to fail, and i'd pour 150% of myself into these guys, and i was really bad at saying "no"...i just couldn't do it. i'd burn myself out on the first lap every time. i gave them everything i had and kept the drama going on top of it. strange thing is...when i exhausted myself and began to pull away, it would renew the situation with some twisted passion on their part. they wanted me more bcuz i wasn't interested, and bcuz it was so hard to say no...i'd seriously drain any vital stores of energy i had to try and appease them till i just couldn't take it. it was crazy! also the most violent attacks (astral) were a nightly occurrence...most definitely bcuz i was so drained. but being used and fu*ked from both ends (not like that...pervert). it was too much for me. my suicidal tendencies got worse/bad, and my depression severe, and i just wanted out of it all. i moved from canada to south carolina to start anew...but it still took a couple more twisted relationships before i finally gave up. I GET LOST IN MEN, and i had to start focusing on me, if was going to survive. i didn't intended on being celibate and it's not something set in stone. i just learned to say no, and began using it a lot, and began understanding a lot more about myself and people in general...my focus shifted from "needing" the attention, to just wanting to understand where all that need comes from, and how people interact...and what's really going on.:roll:. sometimes i think i've just switched gears...and now i'm trying to make something else work by draining all my energy = my life. and i'm not much better at it then i am with relationships. in the back of my mind there are a lot of things that i feel experienced with, but i have a hard time saying that it's all been worthwhile. even all this astral stuff. for some reason everything feels like a distraction or escape for me. i just wanted to push some light in from the other end, have you stay open to the possibilities, and see that everything is overlapped...not separate. that you have the possibility of making things better with your function...even if it's just having sex. that you can walk away knowing you "enlightened" another person, or walk away knowing you were a drain (and contributed little if nothing). i think about the movie with jonny depp "Don Juan DeMarco" and even though he was a freak by most male standards, he empowered women in this work.  he left them with a greater appreciation for themselves and for the art of a man. where with a great majority of men i feel there is a contradiction. they can worship tits, and butt, and pus*y...but the forget there is a person attached to all that. they desire sex and strive after it at their core, but after they get it/consume it...they trash the divine vessel it was delivered in. and you guys can argue with me all you want...but that's just wrong!

333
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 25, 2005, 19:06:19
Souljah, thanks for sharing with us your experience in life. It must be hard for you having that bad past. I understand why do you speak in men in that way. If you read my posts you will see too why i speak about women in the way i speak. They were the 1st ones giving me the idea that women = sex and just that and that women = crap. INow i dont think in that way, just try to be more positive and understand that there are several types of women (good ones, bad ones, etc).

Even so, some things are difficult to change now. Due to my past life and my teen years now i think i cannot be conected to a girl and i dont need that. Just want to went on partys with my friends, have some occasional girlfriends and thats all.

I dont believe that humans are monogamics. If i have a girlfriends, sooner or later she will cheat on me (even knowing that i can wish other women, i will not cheat on her...i keep my word on what i say).

I know that you want a man that knows how to love someone deeeply in a divine way. Trust me that there are a lot of guys outhere like that. Even myself...i think that if i find the right person i can love her in much more profound way..it just happens that women are not that sensible. When i speak and really transmit my deep feelings about the world and the life women (and men) look at me with "that face".

If i speak in the beauty hidden in small things or the way i just love to look at something (be it a tree or a building) or if speak in the crazy dreams that i have (real dreams during sleep) that transmit me a lot of energy and strange feelings (my dreams are that crazy..and nice) people will think i am crazy.

Not only that...even if i speak about the life itself (with a buddhistic view), how we do not grab opportunities, women, people, anyone, will not give a s*** to that.

As you see, its not only my past that makes me look at women as just sexual friends or nice friends for some laughing and drinking. They are the 1st ones (not only them...men too...if i speak on such "strange" things....wow) closing the doors to me.

If i act in a cocky.funy way, or in th eopposite way (shy) orin the middle term, or in a spiritual way, whatever, they will always react in a "shut up your mouth" way.

Dont be surprised if i am the way i am...anyway, i dont care if women are like that. I am used to the idea. Its just how things are....find someone that can be that profound its f******* hard and the rare women that i find and that i may love (its that hard for me to fall in love...but when it happens....) already have boyfriends - and i didnt knew that -.


So, if i have sex i can be just happy. Affection and emotional support i will not even trying to find it...women are to much egoistic for giving that OR (even better) i just will not need it (i am learning more about that...energy and great vibe are the secret key for that).
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Mustardseed on May 25, 2005, 19:39:53
Still waiting with baited breadth, for this most interesting and revealing conversation to turn into a OBE  related issue. I am sure you catch my drift Frank

Regards Mustardseed

PS there should be a tongue-in-cheek emoticon , since there is not this will have to do :wink:
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Souljah333 on May 25, 2005, 20:11:37
very cheeky MustardSeed, but so far this is one thread (ironically) that has not been infiltrated by twelve year olds :wink:

plus...i just can't deny a man seeking advice in the art of seducing women.

Kazbadan I know "THAT FACE"!!!
   Since you have gained my respect & understanding. I will when I find the
   time PM you and share the "secrets" to seduction. What the hell :wink:

333
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on May 26, 2005, 00:29:33
I don't even know where to start, but here goes:

1. Masculine Vs. Feminine men and getting girls.

 Personally, as I have stated in my other post I am extremely good with women.  However, I have a good balance between both energies.  For instance, I am a very trendy dresser, have immaculate nails, teeth, breath, trendy hair, and wear very nice shoes.  Some purely masculine men would say this is "metrosexual", however my energy is very charismatic so I can get away with cocky and funny.  However, I also have a very masculine sexual energy that the women can feel.  I radiate this by taking the lead in the interaction. Kind of a Brad Pitt vibe (when he is not in mountain man mode), pretty boy but masculine at the same time.  Sometimes I just grab her hand and taking her to another, more quiet, part of the the club away from her friends. THE BEST IN THE BUSINESS IS MYSTERY and he has a very feminine vibe (although he is 6'4).  www.mysterymethod.com

2. Really loving women VS. getting stepped on

SoulJah's post hit on some VERY good points that the novice Venusian artist (pick up artist) fails to realize.  YOU HAVE TO ADORE WOMEN TO TRUELY GET COCKY AND FUNNY (C&F) and make it work.  For instance, I can establish what I call a "heart connection" with a women very fast and start pulling C&F and she knows I am joking (or am I).  You see, most amateurs try cocky and funny and  just comes off as them trying to put down a women in order to raise their own value.  Women can see right through this and will not take kindly to it.  You have to do it in a charismatic way, and she will know its only flirting.  However, I also have an "I could care less" vibe.  All this means is that I am secure in myself to not be so outcome dependent on the interaction.  Women love secure men.

However, you have to let the women know that you respect yourself and will not be a doormat.  You have to set boundaries right off the bat.  If a women does something during an interaction that I don't like I will do a "freeze-out".  This is wear I will literally turn my back on them, they will feel embarrassed and will turn you around and say sorry.  Sometimes I even say "I don't tolerate second class behavior from anybody" and then start talking to another person.  The girls will always come back and apologize.  Lesson learned.

3. Greatest lesson

Find the "flow" and all the techniques just naturally happen.  You become Casanova with out thinking about it.

Use the force, feel the flow,

Han Solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 26, 2005, 07:30:15
Tyler Durden? Are you him Hans Solo?!


I know that in its most basic form its all about the "flow" or, "energy" as i call it.

In the days that i am really in a good mood, with that vibe that you know, it seem s that women are more atracted to me. What i am trying to learn now, ots hot to get that vibe, that energy flow. I want that energy, because i feel so much better in my life (not speaking about women). I am learning how to reach it.

TO me, thats more important than to get any women.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Souljah333 on May 26, 2005, 08:46:51
i know on the surface this thread has little to do with the astral. i know people are checking in, but not bothering to reply...Hans, it was good of you to offer some male advice that was wasn't too biased. you ALSO made some good points. there is definitely a cosmic energy that can be tapped into where everything flows, and there's nothing else compared to it, and we are all searching for it Kazbadan. it's what makes the hunt more thrilling then the kill, and it's definitely a worthwhile hobby...learning to wield it whenever.

i don't put much faith in systems, or in scholars & experts. i'm extremely leery of experts of any kind, especially ones with too many words, numbers, excuses, and conclusions. i do however love the "force" and in the company of anyone that's "tapped" in...i'm helpless!
i guess that's what i was talking about when i used the words "charisma" = being one with the force..and "substance" = being one with yourself. it's all a delicate spiders web one walks like a tightrope. the web is designed in the feminine, and every step is masculine in  intention...and together it's a wonderful ying-yang dance. using bradd pitt as an example (albeit he's a definite "looker" which can make it easier & more difficult at once) he embodies "unlimited" potential. there is nothing that "defines" him/boxes him in. he is the non-threatening little boy, the boy next door, the hero, the artist, the greasy-handed mr. fix it, the connoisseur, the predator, the prey, and the dormant serial-killer all rolled into one (and so much more). the most sensuous photos i've ever seen, were of him in a dress. :D (VERY SEXY).  so i believe that that is very much part of it as well...drawing on everything and pulling it together into one dynamic force...and pulling it into being. it a worthy profession, that calls on intense training. i don't believe its something that can be done in separate steps, but involves a unification of everything one is. and that one thing taking deliberate/intentional & humble steps forward...straining, but never losing the connection that is the cosmic force. if anything separates us from animals it is this "action" of "stepping out", reaching hold of whatever comes into our path, and introducing it as a gift...back into the "collective"...and the function should be as natural as breathing. the force can't be forced and to me that makes it a natural art. there is no right or wrong way to go about it, utilize it...it's divinely perfect. it's the participation mystique.

yada-yada-yada :roll:
333
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Souljah333 on May 26, 2005, 09:00:29
and maybe it's in knowing that the connection NEVER can be broken?!? and that no matter how far one goes, how deep one dives, or high one jumps... no matter what one does...they're connection is the only constant. if you can trust in that...then there are no limits. something in that free-abandon...that mystery that causes one to radiate secure-ness in any situation...is always attractive!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on May 26, 2005, 11:29:28
QuoteTyler Durden? Are you him Hans Solo?!

No, I am not TD. He is one of the gurus whose advice I utilize and study.  I am much better looking than Tyler Durden.  *For anyone not in the seduction community Tyler Durden is just a name handle (like hans solo is for me here) of a Pick up Guru (PUAG).*  Although, I am very good, he could probably still blow me out of the water 90% of the time.  I will become as good as TD in the near future.  I will learn from Mystery and TD, and take their "bootcamps" just to learn from the best.  Then people will want to learn from LukeSkyWalker (me).

Kazbadan

Both TD and Mystery are coming out with their EBooks in the near future.  I can't wait for these 2 ebooks and Franks ebook to come out.  Also, look for products coming out from Swinggcat (I loved his ebook).

TDs: www.realsocialdynamics.com
Mystery:  www.mysterymethod.com
Swinggcat: www.realworldseduction.com

use the force, feel the flow,

Han Solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 26, 2005, 17:02:06
thanks.

I thought that mystery already had an ebook.

btw, Frank, if you are reading this, sorry but i just cant send you the file that i spoke to you...

my stupid email its just like that...its always gives me an error message when sending the file.

(sorry for th off topic)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Tom on May 26, 2005, 17:13:07
www.yousendit.com is the best place to go when e-mail doesn't work for sending files. It is free and it takes up to 1 GB files, but I try to stay under 100 MB to avoid having my connections broken for uploading and downloading. They hold files up to 7 days on their server for retrieval.

I seem to recall the name Tyler Durden in the movie "Fight Club"?

The book "The Celestine Prophecy" talks about energy being masculine or feminine, but so far I have not had much luck in determining one from the other. It is the same with yin and yang energy with some chi kung exercises. Maybe energy doesn't really have polarity this way?
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 26, 2005, 18:52:45
Thanks for the tip Tom ;-)

Frank, tomorrow i will try to send you that...i am too tired today (sorry).


I dont know almost anything about yin and yang but i suppose that the polarity of energy on that view its about positive energy and negative one. I think that there is only one kind of energy (if you forget the negative one). Its the positive energy.

Just my modest opinion...i really dont know nothing about that stuff.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 26, 2005, 19:20:07
F***!!! I Just sent the filebut it seems that  its avaible now for everyone!

Maybe i am f***** now!! The file its not legal (you should buy it 1st)...now what?

Tom, is the file avaible for everyone?!?

Am i "burned"?!
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Tom on May 26, 2005, 20:42:47
When you send the file, you give it the e-mail address of the person you want it sent to. That person gets a notification by e-mail to pick up the file. You get a link to go to and an e-mail notification if you provided your e-mail address. If you want other people to have access to it, you have to share the link it gives you or the person you send it to has to share the link. It is very secure. I have done the same thing you have, sending copyrighted material, and never had a problem.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Frank on May 26, 2005, 21:21:31
Tom:

Thanks for facilitating that, received no problem!

Yours,
Frank
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on May 27, 2005, 04:33:22
TOm, thanks again! For moments i thought that i would have a problem! :-)

Frank, glad to know that finally you have the file.

Tell me what you think about it later.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on June 01, 2005, 19:09:21
Coming back to the conversation about girls...


i am not a guy of falling in love but i fall in love for a girl that already has a BF (boyfriends)...i didnt knew that at the time.

Now there is this other girl that i think its in love with me but i am not interested in her (she is a little boring) and besides that i am in love with the other (so stupid i am).

The other girl (the one with BF) she really enjoys my presence and if she hasnt a BF i would say that she was almost starting to get in love with me too (i can see that).

Now i just dont know what to do...which one i choose? i am gonna cry, lol! i only have stupid things like that in my life...., lol! :)
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on June 02, 2005, 11:04:03
Use a boyfriend destroyer on her, this is how (quick overview): for more info check out fastseduction.com {search BF destroyer}.  This will not work if they have only been dating a month-if that is the case leave it alone.  They are probably still in the star crossed lovers mode.


1.  Tell her how you think that she and her boyfriend are PERFECT together.  Tell her how it is so cute how he full fills ALL of her needs and will do ANYTHING for her (really play this up).  "I mean he is always like (in a wimpy, but as if you think it is cute,  voice say) " Are you ok baby, is there anything I can do to help?" Continue with " I could see you guys getting married in a year.  You guys would have the PERFECT marriage, I mean you would probably have 4 kids soon after and settle down."

"I really envy you guys.  You see, I am so different than that, you would hate to be with a guy like me right now.  All I want to do is have fun with women, take them cool places, enjoy the more simple things with them, and learn what really drives women wild.  I think so many guys are satisfied with just getting off (sexually).  I hate that attitude, I want to be able to drive a women wild both sexually and emotionally."  I guess I am just not ready for marriage LIKE YOUR BOYFRIEND PROBABLY IS"

(this conversation will make her long for the simpler days when she just dated and didn't have to worry about marriage.  If you really play up the marriage thing she will probably get scared and will become more distant to her boyfriend.  DON'T LET HER KNOW THAT YOU LIKE HER-Only THAT THERE IS A CHANCE THAT YOU GUYS COULD GET TOGETHER AFTER SHE BREAKS UP WITH HIM (if she already knows your feelings YOU messed up)  She will also long to be with someone who actually wants to know what pleases a women.

2.  DATE AS MANY OTHER GIRLS AS POSSIBLE (most important)

 DO NOT ACT AS IF YOU ARE HOLDING OUT FOR HER---THAT IS THE HIGHEST ORDER OF WUSS BEHAVIOR!

 This also show that you are in high demand and she better act quickly.

GFTOW-look up this acronym on fastseduction.com

3.  Be C&F around her.  

4.  Be more "alpha male" than her Boyfriend.  Never directly insult him, you never know if they will stay together.  
RULE: NEVER SAY DIRECTLY WHAT YOU CAN ALLUDE TO.

5.  ALWAYS HAVE FUN AROUND HER, act like you don't care, visualize success.  Dont become stiff around her and be afaid to say something because "you LOVE her" --that is the surest way to lose a girl.  You have to act non attached to the outcome, and the outcome you desire will manifest.  In fact, when meditating act as if you are already with her, and visualize explict romantic scenes with her.  Really feel the touch, see her squirm,etc--really get into it.  This is good for manifesting reality, and you just may find yourself in FZero like I did the other night.  If you can do this in the Astral then by all means do that (visualization on steriods).

 you see her boyfriend is probably boring by now and doesn't want to go out much anymore.  He thinks "why should i go out if I have sex at home" (bad move on his part).  You have to SHOW to her that you will be more fun than him.  (THERE HAS TO BE A REASON FOR HER TO BREAK UP WITH HIM).

 Talk to her as if he is THE perfect boyfriend and SHE will tell you, thereby making the case for you, that he really is not that good of a boyfriend.  You see, she may not really like her boyfriend too much, but she may be in a comfort zone.  So, you need to make that comfort zone uncomfortable by alluding to the threat of marriage (if she is young), her boyfriend is not fulfilling her needs, and showing her how desirable you are to other women.  

6.  show her what she is missing by not being with you

-Invite her to exciting things.  For example cliff diving (you do live in Portugal don't you). Dangerous things.  The kind of things she will remember the rest of your life.  If you both do them the bond will be so strong that her boyfriend will not be able to compete.  IF he goes, make sure you do it first-she will still give you the credit for being exciting.

-Create Mystery surrounding you.  When you have to go give Vague details on what you will be doing, but in a way that says "I may be doing something bad, or dangerous with another girl" This will keep you in her mind when you are gone. OR, create a secret that ONLY you two know about, and talk about it in whispers (make sure it is cool or you will look like a fool).  Women love secrets and inside jokes.  This will give her the feeling she is doing something wrong but exciting (think affair).

-Weave fascinating stories with sensory rich detail.  WATCH DON JUAN DEMARCO the movie to get an idea.  Talk about everyday life in an extraordinary way, but only give her a taste and never repeat a story for her.  Make her beg for more.

--If she starts talking about you two getting together, tell her "You could'nt handle a guy like me, I mean, you and your boyfriend are so tame together"  She will long to prove you wrong, plus you just made her boyfriend look pathetic in an indirect way.  

7. If she starts talking about her relationship problems, she is probably either, or both: Same rules apply

--. Wants a therapist:  RULE: NEVER BE THE THERAPIST.  Simply Tell her that you think they are perfect together because they are the SAME.  Then, use a behavior  of his (to illustrate your point) that you know she probably HATES.  For instance, I used this one a couple of months ago:

Me:  I think you guys are perfect.  How many people just love to sit around and play video games TOGETHER all the time.  Its just so cute how YOU LOVE to just sit there and watch him play for like hours on end.  I could never do that.  I love to get out of the house and paint the town....red (cocky smile)

Her: I HATE WHEN HE PLAYS VIDEO GAMES!! That is the worst.  He never wants to do anything.

Me:  Well, If you were cooler, and didn't play video games so much, :wink:  I would invite you to hang out with my friends and I when we go out.  However, only if you are fun.

HER:  I am SOOO fun

Me:  Ok, but don't expect a long walk on the beach, and Defiantly no hot steamy make out session, ok?

Her:  :P Blah, blah ,blah

------. If she is fishing to see if you like her:  use the same technique as above, and NEVER TELL HER YOU LIKE HER.  She will get the point (that she may have a chance) with duologue like above.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
if the reader is not young like Kaz, then say that it is so cool that she doesn't care that he is still a flirt (allude to the fact that he is a non committal playboy), or how she doens't care that he is ALWAYS on the internet (Looking at porn?, internet romance?)


Use the force, feel the flow,

Han Solo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on June 02, 2005, 16:36:48
Hans: "nuggets of gold" its what your words are, lol! good advice thanks. I will make you some questions and some comments about your ideas (and other things):

1)I have another girl chasing me, like i told you. she doesnt atract me ´cause she is a "wussy" needy girl...a little boring. Anyway,  do you think that i should have some "fun" with her just to increase my sexual experience? I meanm it doesnt need to be just sex, it could be more special, but i know that it would be just for onenight or few days since i dont love her. My problem is that i would hurt her...i am not like that (hurting people)..she loves me (i am not being arrogant...i am 90% shure of that). How could i have sex with her in this way...having sex and leave her alone after that? how can i say to her that its just an "temporary" dating? when i speak that way with her she gets even more crazy with me. GIve me some insgights on this.


2) coming back to the goddess (the other second girl) with BF...if she is able to cheat her BF with me (she is not at now...lucky would be me) she will be able to cheat me too in the future. If a girl leaves a BF that easy, with same ease she would let me alone. Even if you say that she wouldnt leave me because i am not wussy, remember that:

a) i would never be shure of her loyalty since she betrayed the BF.

b) if a real pick up masteer, a real Don Juan meet her (and she is my GF) she would leave me...imagine: she left the BF ´cause he was a wussy (supposition..she is with the BF yet). Now, with the Don Juan guy i would be like a wussy too when compared with him...so she would leave me. No? GIrls can cheat very easly thei BFs.

c) like in any other relationship, i will have my "wussy" moments and moments in which i will be tired of things (stressed life, etc) and that can be a good moment for her cheating me or finding another BF, since she has made the same in past (i mean: she left the BF because he was wussy,etc)

3. I think that she may really like her BF for some indirect clues: we speak a lot and we have fun with each other i can say she likes me a little, but (there is always a but :))....when we speak she never speaks about her life and even less about her BF. She never tells if he is fat or thin, tall or small...nothing...i know the name because i asked..just that. Besides that, before i knew that she was "married" shw never spoke about a BF, even when i was teasing her a lot or when i was "pushing" to much (really, if she hasnt the BF i think that at this our we would be dating...we play so much with each other! she is lovely). These are clues that she likes her BF because she never says a word about her life (thats strange) and even less about her BF. I found that she has a BF because i asked to her directly (in the right context without being a wussy).

4) About being fun and different, i think that she find that by hersefl..in fact i dont pretend to be what i am not...i really enjoy different things and have different  dreams. I speak in my wish of flying (parashuts) i say to her that every weekend i am at partys with friends dancing and laughing all the night (truth too), etc...so thats not a problem (btw, i really live in Portugal). When i am with her we have lors of fun (and we are in the work..i am with her only in that occasions). Even when we are in the middle of a reunion we play a lot and laugh: i tickle her in the ribs, she stoles me objects, i draw on her hand with a pen just for "boring" her, etc. I do that not in a "faked" way but with pleasure and confidence (this is not a question , just a comment).

5) this lead me to other question: sometimes i think i tease her to much...i play a lot with her, busting her ball and being funny and making jokes about her (in a way she likes). She seems to really love that because she answers in the same way, she wents in the game and she is cocky and funny too. The problem is that i play so much with her that we dont cumpliment each other on anyway. I mean...maybe i am being to "hard". I think i need to make her some cumpliment but that may look like too wussy. What do you say?

6) another random question: what do you think if i speak to her about other girls that are chasing me? would that be to damn cocky?


7) i have little time now. At the end of june i will never see her again (our contract with job ends and we get into seperate ways...besides she lives in a place thats 1 h from my home). I have little time to act. like the song says "its now or never".

PS- what do you mean in the last sentence:  

"if the reader is not young like Kaz, then say that it is so cool that she doesn't care that he is still a flirt (allude to the fact that he is a non committal playboy), or how she doens't care that he is ALWAYS on the internet (Looking at porn?, internet romance?)" my english its not good and i am not shure of the meaning.

PSS- what your nick on fast101?

bye bye and thanks a lot ;)


edit: i write this post very fast and only now i  could see a lot of spell mistakes. sorry guys.
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Hans Solo on June 02, 2005, 22:39:07
Quote1)I have another girl chasing me, like i told you. she doesn't attract me ´cause she is a "wussy" needy girl...a little boring. Anyway, do you think that i should have some "fun" with her just to increase my sexual experience? I meanm it doesnt need to be just sex, it could be more special, but i know that it would be just for onenight or few days since i dont love her. My problem is that i would hurt her...i am not like that (hurting people)..she loves me (i am not being arrogant...i am 90% shure of that). How could i have sex with her in this way...having sex and leave her alone after that? how can i say to her that its just an "temporary" dating? when i speak that way with her she gets even more crazy with me. GIve me some insgights on this

 I can't really tell you what to do her  because I am often in the same position as you, and think about this alot (like with a girl right now).  I also don't like hurting anyone, but you have to remember girls like to mess around too.  Sometimes it is just our ego saying " I don't want to hurt this girl because she REALLY likes me too much--when she could just be physically attracted to you"  You have to calibrate your actions with your belief structures, but I say go for it--I probably will too.

Quote2) coming back to the goddess (the other second girl) with BF...if she is able to cheat her BF with me (she is not at now...lucky would be me) she will be able to cheat me too in the future. If a girl leaves a BF that easy, with same ease she would let me alone. Even if you say that she wouldn't leave me because i am not wussy, remember that:

a) i would never be sure of her loyalty since she betrayed the BF.

b) if a real pick up masteer, a real Don Juan meet her (and she is my GF) she would leave me...imagine: she left the BF ´cause he was a wussy (supposition..she is with the BF yet). Now, with the Don Juan guy i would be like a wussy too when compared with him...so she would leave me. No? GIrls can cheat very easly thei BFs.

There is a saying that says "women are like monkeys, they won't leave one branch unless they have a firm grip on another".  Women are emotional and you have to know that there are some men out there that can push their buttons.  However, don't get jaded on women like Tyler Durden.  There are good ones out there, but in the mean time get to know as many women as you can, so you will know when a good one comes along.  You can ensure loyalty (as much as possible) by maintaining your attractiveness to the women.  This means be unpredictable, fun, adventurous, C&F, and never become a wussy.

Quote3. I think that she may really like her BF for some indirect clues: we speak a lot and we have fun with each other i can say she likes me a little, but (there is always a but Smile)....when we speak she never speaks about her life and even less about her BF. She never tells if he is fat or thin, tall or small...nothing...i know the name because i asked..just that. Besides that, before i knew that she was "married" shw never spoke about a BF, even when i was teasing her a lot or when i was "pushing" to much (really, if she hasnt the BF i think that at this our we would be dating...we play so much with each other! she is lovely). These are clues that she likes her BF because she never says a word about her life (thats strange) and even less about her BF. I found that she has a BF because i asked to her directly (in the right context without being a wussy).

I think this is a good sign.  This tells me she is passed the "star crossed lovers stage" and probably is now in the bestfriend who occasionally have sex stage (or long term relationship stage).  This is when to use my BF destroyer stuff.  Just keep your ears open to anything she says about ther BF, then play on it.  For instance, if she says something good about him then talk about them getting married and her having 6 kids.  If she says something bad about him, just keep it in the back of your mind, and then at a later date do something along the lines of the video game dialog in my last post.

Quote5) this lead me to other question: sometimes i think i tease her to much...i play a lot with her, busting her ball and being funny and making jokes about her (in a way she likes). She seems to really love that because she answers in the same way, she wents in the game and she is cocky and funny too. The problem is that i play so much with her that we dont cumpliment each other on anyway. I mean...maybe i am being to "hard". I think i need to make her some cumpliment but that may look like too wussy. What do you say?

 All Reformed nice guys come to this fork in the road.  Use C&F like a spice in the conversation.  You can have a real conversation but then out of nowhere hit her with a C&F comment.  Also, sometimes instead of being totally C&F, be playful.  Do stuff like thumb wrestling, tickling, etc. Remember, keep her on an emotional rollercoaster.

 
Quoteanother random question: what do you think if i speak to her about other girls that are chasing me? would that be to damn cocky?

NEVER TELL HER THIS.  SHOW HER THIS, BUT SAY NOTHING! ALLUDE, ALLUDE, ALLUDE.  Keep being mysterious about this.  If she likes you she will want to know about them, but only give her vague answers.  Look at the difference in these two circumstances:

1.  Circumstance: you are out together:

Her:  " Oh my god, That girl was just flirting with you"
YOu: "She obviously wants me" (said in a non chalant, matter of fact way)

this one is C&F because you act like "duh, where have YOU been, all girls love me"

2.  Circumstance : You are out together:

You:  Oh, did I tell you how many girls like me right now
HEr: No
YOu:  Blah, blah, blah


she is thinking you are trying to show off and get her approval-another type of wuss behavior.

It is a fine line, but #1 is ok and #2 is not.

Quoteif the reader is not young like Kaz, then say that it is so cool that she doesn't care that he is still a flirt (allude to the fact that he is a non committal playboy), or how she doens't care that he is ALWAYS on the internet (Looking at porn?, internet romance?)" my english its not good and i am not shure of the meaning.

 I knew that other people besides you were probably going to read that post in the future, so I wanted to give them a reversal of the marriage comment.  You see, If an older person is going to do the BF destroyer, then they have to realize that the girl probably WANTS to get married, so you have to change your tactics.  It really had nothing to do with you.

QuotePSS- what your nick on fast101?

 It is LukeSkyWalker.  However, I have only posted 3 or 4 times on that forum, and they were when I was new ( I am much better now)..  So there is nothing on that site of mine that is worth while to read.  I suggest you download Tyler durdens archives, toecutter, Mystery, etc.

Use the force, Feel the flow,
Han SOlo
Title: Art of Seduction: approaching women
Post by: Kazbadan on June 03, 2005, 05:43:59
Thanks Hans.

I read the posts off Tyler and they are of a great help.