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An Audio interview with bob monroe where he talks about some of the deeper parts of his jouney

I searched the forum to see if this one had been posted already, but I don't see it here. It's one of my favorites.

He speaks among other things about his longing for "home," and how he came to the realization that he had left that home because it was boring. Very interesting lens. I found the quality of discussion uplifting.

Hello everyone - this is my first message here - I hope it's in the right place. Your expertise and caring energy is appreciated - thanks for providing this wonderful resource. I will read more as I get time. Here's where I am:

In 2008 I had a spontaneous satori, and I fell into what Kepple calls focus 4. That place where everything is one, and all is connected. Formless love. Being, wisdom and understanding itself. I see it as the seed of the universe tree, and here on the physical we are but the leaves. For two weeks I was in total samadhi, as if lucid dreaming and wide awake day and night. For a year I was in both realities, here and other, deeper here, in and out in waves. Later it all settled down. I naturally became interested in all things spiritual, including the astral reality.

I got a book called A Field Guide to Lucid Dreaming by Dylan Tuccillo and others, and I tried really really hard for about a year or three, with almost no success, so I gave up, but it was there in the background. Recently it has appeared on my inner radar again, and I can feel it cooking.

A few nights ago (weeks) I had the vibrations, much more intensely than normal, and I knew what they were, so I surrendered and let it kill me. I separated, feet first, and found myself in a dream house, where I went to the mirror and saw my face. "My hair looks a bit longer. Interesting." I went to the lounge and saw my guitar, and fell onto the couch - an old couch i had years ago. I got really excited, "I'm out! I'm out!" (I know, newbie stuff! and physically stimulated to the point of getting turned on - and snap - I was back in my body.

I've been trying really, really hard for about three weeks now. I know I'm trying too hard. I'm losing a lot of sleep, and can't seem to pop out. I can feel I'm on the threshold - really close - and I'm blocking myself somehow. I've read a lot, and listened to a lot of advice. A lot. I've tried multiple exit techniques, and I'm a long time meditator, so relaxing is like breathing for me. When I meditate I just go quiet. I don't think, I don't focus, I just be. It's wonderful - a kind of low grade samadhi, and it follows me through life. My whole life has become a meditation, and it's no longer a practice for me. I have grown in insight and understanding in incredible ways, and my heart has opened wide - and now this astral thing seems to be knocking on the door. I am excited to explore - but I'm getting in my own way. I just can't get out of the body.

I think part of the problem is that I'm so attuned to the energy system in the physical body. After a big car accident I had a lot of work to do in that area, and it has become my default to do the cellular healing thing. It keeps me in the body.

Kepple's phasing makes sense to me. I read his stuff and listened to it on youtube as well. I know it's the way - so my focus has been trying not to actually leave the body, separate with vibrations, but just phase. I've tried incorporating Active Imagination (from Jung), I've tried ladders, ropes, swimming, wobbling, wriggling, floating, rolling, flying, dropping, popping, sniffing, farting my way out - but no go. I tried giving up and letting it happen. I tried fighting hard and not giving up. I tried giving up and not giving up at the same time. I tried ignoring the sign posts and focusing on the destination. I think I want to stop trying altogether, so this whole message is a kind of "someone please pull me out already and tell me what I'm messing up."

Thanks!