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Oh wow, me too! Though mine was mostly because I was broke and homeless. But now, *sigh* my neighbors are a bunch of black majick using putas.

[Wow, I know I've written posts before about "lack of activity" around me... But, perhaps I should've instead asked about the different types of negs people have encountered and are fairly positive1 really exist. Like;]

Wow, I know I've written posts before about "lack of activity" around me... But, perhaps I should've instead asked about the different types of negs people have encountered and are fairly positive¹ really exist. Like;

• growth rate
• reproductive rate
• inactive period
• feeding rate
• repellants
• cohabilitation with other spiritual/metaphysical/energy entities
• different symptoms -is it like the different "breeds" of vampire for instance? (*Sanguinary, Psychic, Pranic, Elemental, Empathic, Negative, Eclectic, Adaptive-?)

Because I'm not sure if it's something I brought, or he brought, but might be seeing some signs of neg-parasites amongst me and my fiance. Maybe it's just stress, but when I flush natural or positive energy through my body it'll get better, but come back if I forget to shield after an energy flushing.





 ¹(as much as you can be without scientific evidence or proof beyond any reasonable doubt that you can share that is)

[Date/Time of Incident]

^{Date/Time of Incident
~Wensday, January 31, 2007~
'3:30PM'[/u]}

   It's been a while since my last entry, nearly four years. Today I was caught in that delicate state between sleeping and waking. And the presence I've always felt around me made itself known. I'd lay down to rest a bit, maybe some harmless, teenager, sexual fantasizing. I felt it on my right leg first, my hearing was dulled, my sight a bit skewed. A tugging on my leg, I thought it was just me disconnecting from my body. Till the tugging grew stronger, and started to pull my legs apart. I'd turnned my head. Astral, physical, what does it bonking matter huh? And I heard him laugh at me. When I started to freak out, get nervous, when my pulse started to race, I heard him laugh at me. I felt exposed, like I'd been stripped of my clothes. No touching other than my legs being pulled open, but the feeling of being exposed was enough. I tried to make a sign of the cross. Me, completely non religious/once a wiccan/now a hair's breadth from being an athiest me.

   My hands weren't in my control, I struggled, I ended up pinned momentarily. Then I finally got my hands under my control enough to make a cross with my fingers, and I could hear again. Still pinned, still exposed, still feeling my heart race and my leg being pulled. But I could hear, and it was enough to give me the strength to try and figure out what else I could do to get myself free, since my arms had been pinned immediately after I made the cross. I thought, and then spoke. Slurred and muffled, then clearer and clearer I called out "Jesus". I don't bonking believe in Christianity man, and that's what I said. "Jesus." I realized about five seconds later that I was sitting up in bed, looking around me and still crying "Jesus." Now I'm trembling, feeling my pulse slowing back to normal, a lingering pain in my leg and writing this so I don't forget. That strong, bold, wild me was actually brought down. bonk, I can't stand it.

   Here's to Jesus eh?

   Leslie-Ann Cho

   "Darkness, magic, Light, guns and blades are like the rest of the worlds' weapons. Their use for good or evil all depends on the wielder."

For dying in dreams, the oddest one may have been in my first post but I've had a lot of others. There are always phantom pains that linger however, and I'm become really sensitive about my body and It's well being.

Well, the presence I feel in the dark might not be shadow people, it could just be that it's dark and so I associate it with shadows.

Heat, cold, strange pressures or feelings of lightness. a subtle shift, maybe feeling a bit too normal. All of these are signs of things, entities energies, whatever, that aren't your physical body. It could be your astral body, a strong thought or emotion, the energy or presence of another. Of things left behind or yet to come. But unless it intentionally causes you harm, it's nothing to worry over.

I frequently feel the right side of my face, just the right, suddenly tingling and warming, as if something inside of me is pushing out, sometimes it even travels down to my waist. Always starts from the top of my head though. And then there are the "spider leg" sensations, prickles in certain spots. Nothing's tried to harm me so I don't worry. I just learn and practice defense enough so that if something eventually does try to hurt me, I'm ready.

I've seen them. At first it was just out of the corners of my eyes, then it was more like a looming presence. Sometimes I'm completely terrified of the dark, feeling them waiting there. But I suck it up and go to sleep. And sometimes It's like normal. Nothing there, can't feel it at all. I know it's not the being alone thing because I'm never alone and even when there is someone in the room with me I feel it.
I notice it happens more when I get irritated or angry that day however. If I get into a really bad knock-down-drag-out fight it gets to where I can't be in the dark for days. I don't know if that's just how the ones around me react. Whether they're trying to comfort me or scare me. but it used to be kinda uncomfortable thinking there was someone watching me in the dark as I slept.
It never did anything however so I started thinking that it was watching out for me, trying to get me to calm down and stuff when I'm upset. The more upset I get the longer it sticks around. Do you think that's a good or bad thing though?

Well, there are rumors that the Pentagon employs psychics to help them do experiments and stuff. I don't know whether I fully believe that though, the person who told me said they were kidnapping the psychics. I refuse to believe that our government is that close to Hitler's. I refuse! I voted for these people!

A "Neg" is a negative entity/energy. Most usually up to no good unless you can defend against. Then it has to work harder. There are actual human astral projectors or spirits out there that will try to screw you over, yes. But it's mainly negs in my experience.
Negs and other "bad" things will always come back, pushing at shields and defenses no matter how pious/good/righteous/kind/smart you are. But if you can defend and cut them off before they fuse themselves to you, they you can basically get rid of them on your own. I guess it's why I've heard of so many people shielding before they "take off" which doesn't really help when on involuntary or spontaneous trips. Just do the best you can and hit someone else up for help if you need it.

Searching for important, rarely known, historical events in:
6/23/98
4/24/98
1939
1947
1974
1993

1993 has to be connected to 1974 or 1947
1939 has to be connected to 1947 or 1974
6/23/98 has to be connected to 4/24/98

~

   I closed my eyes, tired, and thought of a family, which turnned into a macabre horror scene. A female "doll" with no hair and a knife through her head turnned and looked at me. I felt a click. I opened my eyes but closed them again, thinking I could distract myself with a different thought. She was there only she smiled this time, I felt the click, and opened my eyes. This time I saw Chucky, he laughed, I heard the click. A stuffed panther crouched low, ready to pounce,  growl coming from him. A click, trapped, being dragged down, can't escape. The voices, the laughter, fear, help me. Release me, get me out. Let go. I awake, one laugh left behind.

~

   I close my eyes, I woke at 6'o'clock again. I feel a humming, a buzzing through my body. I'm seperated from it, sorta. I see as if I'm on my blanket, but feel it over me. Bars, for a princess style set of curtains above. A glowing, ghostly yellow-green figure, I can only see the torso, feels like my head is facing down. Something in my hand, he holds me there. I escape.

~

   I close my eyes, once again I've awoken at 6. The buzzing, vibrating through my bones. I awake, seperated. I see the world around me clearly. I think, where am I? Why am I still attached to my body? I think of vampires, wanting to meet one. I feel someone on me, like before. Lips on my neck, hands held down against my stomach, I feel lips on my throat. I wake.

Leslie-Ann Cho

[This is just something that's been stirring about up there for some time, and I wanted to know what you all thought of it.Suppose, just theoretically of course, a man and a woman were to become lovers, and I know that this sounds pretty basic but hold your horses and you'll see my point. Anyway, suppose this union were to present a child, and yes I know unions like this might always present a child but please! Honestly now. (sorry if I'm babbling but I am a tad nervous) Now go to forward a few centuries, say that a future generation from said child were to produce one of the first ancestors, the man or the woman, doesn't really matter. What if said ancestor somehow found his/her past lover again, in a completely different family.Would this be incest? Or would it be all right for both parties and their families?Sorry, if that confused you just let me know and I'll try to clear it up a bit more, but as I said before, I am a tad bit nervous.Thank you for wasting your time to read this.]

This is just something that's been stirring about up there for some time, and I wanted to know what you all thought of it.

Suppose, just theoretically of course, a man and a woman were to become lovers, and I know that this sounds pretty basic but hold your horses and you'll see my point. Anyway, suppose this union were to present a child, and yes I know unions like this might always present a child but please! Honestly now. (sorry if I'm babbling but I am a tad nervous) Now go to forward a few centuries, say that a future generation from said child were to produce one of the first ancestors, the man or the woman, doesn't really matter. What if said ancestor somehow found his/her past lover again, in a completely different family.

Would this be incest? Or would it be all right for both parties and their families?

Sorry, if that confused you just let me know and I'll try to clear it up a bit more, but as I said before, I am a tad bit nervous.

Thank you for wasting your time to read this.

~April 11, 2002~
'11:59 AM'

   As I lay down I suddenly, more suddenly than anytime else, had a dream.

   I saw someone go into a cave and no one knew I was there. I could hear everyone's thoughts like I was the one thinking them. They all hated him and he looked around thinking, 'I know they hate me for bringing them here but it's okay now.' Then he went into a harem, the whole cave was filled with people who needed the sea to live, a woman in the harem approached him and announced that she was unhappy when he took her outside and said "we have water," they looked over a beautiful blue-green, though more green than blue, sea. Then he said, "On the left there is a pool for drinking," there was a small fresh water pool right next to the sea with a shallow bottom and rocks and seaweed dotting the sand in it, a ring of rocks around it.

   I woke briefly and saw only black before I was there again, no one was on the rocks now and I was floating above them when five boys fell from the sky onto them. I talked to them for a bit before I woke breifly again. I came back and zoomed over the ocean, feeling a sinking sensation in my whole body as I dropped slightly, almost crashing against the bottom of the small fresh water pool, which was actually connected to the sea. I soared up to the mountains and saw the cliff that the boys fell on, and that the person everyone hated had been on. I felt like I was riding on a roller coaster and my stomach was falling to the ground. I was thinking in a sort of narration to two of the boys. On of the boys I told about the sea and the fresh water pool and the other I told was about soaring to the heavens and the beauty you could find there.

   Then I woke briefly with the image of the cliff which had moved from the side of the sea to the top of the mountains inland, looking for all the world like a temple entrance, still on the inside of my eyelids. I could here the music on the computer still playing before I thought of the sea and kind of zoomed under, still awake. I saw a pattern of colored coral, but instead of the color ones mind paints in dreams it was black and white, though I knew the color were there. Like my mind painted them black and white instead of painting them in colors. I slipped back into the world and felt a rush of pleasure, as I saw a form of one of the boys hovering over me but as soon as he went into me we were in the fresh water pool by the sea again and I could see a giant, very huge, octupus in a deep chasm in the sea that hadn't been there before. Later he spoke to one of his friends about it. About how he wasn't able to f*** in the bed, his friend said something along the lines of kinky and the other boy said that wasn't it, and began to explain that as soon as we connected we were in the sea.

   I woke again, briefly, then dreamt again, though this time when I dreamt I was searching for something and cutting off a baby octupus' tentacles, when I realized what I was doing I turned to the giant octupus and he was just waving his tentacles. Then I was asking if the boys wanted to leave but they all said that they liked it there, they had nymphs taking care of them and feeding them grapes, giving them massages. They said something about paradise.

   I left, a purple portal with a white aura around it appearing, feeling strangely sad, and this time whe I woke I felt my eyelids flickering open, though they were still closed, and I could see the walls, but the wood tile pattern of the living room floor in the house in Hawaii replaced the roof, my arms felt like they were floating off of my stomach and my head felt like it was floating to the side and falling off the right side of the bed, only my feet were still stable so it was like my head was the pointer on the hands of a clock. I heard a click right in my right ear and vibrations through my very bones. I felt again like I was falling off the side of the bed but I was on the left and it was impossible for me to fall off the right side of the bed, if anything I'd fall off the left side. I felt worried about being bothered by ghosts and demons so I tried to wake up and couldn't, I grew more worried, though still curious as to what was happening.

   I finally focused all my will on opening my eyes, I felt my lids flickering open and a sense of the world clicking into place. I lay there a moment before what happened truely hit me, I was having an Out-Of-Body-Experience. I closed my eyes briefly to get my bearings and felt vibrations going through my body like on April 4th. I openned my eyes and began to write this, my experience was one week from my last odd experience, and like before the first digit in the hour block of time was a one and the minute block was in the late fifties.

Leslie-Ann Cho

Never forget that the worlds around you spin on their own axsis, not yours.

You yearn for something you do not know, search for something just beyond your thoughts, long to return to a land you've never been to, and need something you've never heard of. Knowledge will fill that gap, as soon as you realize that knowledge comes after emotion and you need both to lay the foundations of your world.

Has anyone here ever felt a longing for something or somewhere that they can't identify before learning about OBE's? Anyone ever felt like they were missing a huge part of their world? Or needed something they couldn't find? I have, and when I found out about AP I felt like I could search there for answers. But once again I must ask if they've ever felt a longing for something they don;t know before learning about AP or hearing about it from someone else.

Leslie-Ann Cho

Never forget that the worlds around you spin on their own axsis, not yours.

You yearn for something you do not know, search for something just beyond your thoughts, long to return to a land you've never been to, and need something you've never heard of. Knowledge will fill that gap, as soon as you realize that knowledge comes after emotion and you need both to lay the foundations of your world.

thanks for trying to help, though it was more "less known" things I was looking for. Combat Skill: My friend has been trying to exercize her mental powers more and I asked for her info on these dates. She gave me something but I have no way of knowing for sure because it was kind of vague. All she said was "Aliens" *smacks forehead* maybe I should've said that in my initial post.

I wasn't tired though. I have this thing, when it's still night, no matter what time I wake up or how long I've been up, I'm still wide awake, unless it's day. Then, no matter how much sleep I get, I'm still dead tired unless the sun's setting.

It seems that I'm only allowed to project when This mysterious other force allows me too, it doesn't seem to want me to go out at all when it's not there. Any suggestions? Or perhaps do any of you think you can help me to understand why?

[}:)]There are a multiple amount of weapons I'd use, my personal favorite would probably be a samurai assassin's sword and something to throw, like throwing stars, a metal fan, throwing knives, darts.

[|)]I've seen the bacteria, but I've also seen a little yellow fuzzy ball of light out of the corner of my eye in my house, it buzzed away when I saw it, I didn't even try to focus on it! My friend called it a Will'O'Wisp, But I thought they were bad? I have several of them around, someone once took an auric picture and there were several white ones in the corner where I saw the yellow one. She said it must be something watching over me because it's certainly not normally in the pictures she takes.

I've died numerous ways in my dreams, the funniest, in my oppinion, waas being shot, then hanged and having my throat slit, then finding myself, hanging upside down in a coffin, pointing at the guy who killed me saying "HE DID IT! I KNOW! I WAS THERE! HE'S THE ONE WHO KILLED ME!" That, in my 'pinion, was nutty.

[B)]What would be big enough to impact us all with depression and grief? Is it the war or something else?

Alot of you need to realise that not everything can be completely explained by logical reasons and calculations. Atleast, not until scientists stop thinking people like us need to be locked up so we don't "taint" others with our "insanity." Personally, I think if Hephaestus believes he can do this, go for it! You'll never get anything or change anything by thinking of what others say is impossible and illogical, just by what your dreams and goals are. Forgive me if I coin a phrase from Nike but... Just do it! Nebaagibuappu (Never give up)

God may or may not have been real, as have all the mystic figures of the world. Remember people talking about how we never went to the moon? How everytime someone says something about seeing Jesus in a hamburger or fire or the sea not many believe but still go there anyway to see if they can spot some logical explanation for this "halucination?" Things can't be explained and so they're written off. Maybe we'll never reach enlightenment, maybe we will. Who really knows

If it was nothing it was a really big nothing to affect all of us. I don't know if the feeling is fading for everyone but my random bouts of depression are getting stronger and more frequent and the feeling is still there for me, it's what triggers the depression.

The pick-up truck was a long time ago. Dad used to take me fishing when I was younger. The boat stopped working, got rid of the truck, stopped going.

We gave the truck to my uncle, he lived pretty far away from us. I have to say lived because that was in Hawaii, I'm in Santa Clara, Cali right now. But we also visit my cousins in Ontario. Right now I'm debating whether I should go to Ontario on my spring break or visit Hawaii with Dad. That could be what brought the pick-up truck into the equation. And the country-side, because it does seem that my cousins at least live near a farm if not in the country.

[xx(] Sad to say I'm getting a reeeaaaly bad feeling about my upcoming birthday. Though that could be paranoia about what we're talking about and my worry that I wont see my next birthday. No, no, don't think like that! I'm supposed to be the depressed for no reason, was supposed to be a boy but came out a girl so my Creator still has to get back to me on the reason I'm still living and unable to get more than a bruise when a long board going 15 mph rams me on the head. AHHH! Don't think like that! Heh, sorry, had to post this.