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Topics - Bordmb

Welcome to Astral Chat! / This Long Short Road
June 27, 2014, 08:32:26
My thoughts are as scattered as my feelings as to what to say here. I would like to start by saying it warms my heart to recognize many of the names here from my last visit quite some time ago. Hello guys, I have missed you.

I do not recall why I left this site in the past but I do know why I am back. I would like to tell you all a story, a story of my long, short road. When I was 14 to the time I was 18 I was lost. Like many wayward youth I turned to drugs, sampling everything I could get my hands on which, living in a city within the US under a firm cartel influence, turned out to be a lot. I numbed myself, deadened my spiritual side and ignored my emotions. I would like to say that one day I woke up and decided on my own to change, but that simply would not be true. Instead over a period of perhaps 3 weeks, though it felt like many months, almost everytime I attempted to project or dreamt I would arrive in the same place. Some part of me already seemed very familiar wIth this place even the first time I recall being there. Allow me to elaborate by simply running through my first recalled visit to this place:

I am in a field of what looks like wheat but it constantly ripples around me like those from a stone cast into a pond. It is not beautiful under the dusky sky, yet I know it shuld be. The sky is always cloudy and looks as if there is a blanket of smog. I try to fly but find myself unable. As I look around I notice a faint glow in the distance. *flash* I am standing under a very worn lamp post. Behind me, the same field I had been in. In front stretches a path as far as I can see. Seeing no other choice, I set off on this path and I am instantly hit by a feeling of sorrow and regret. As I continue on the path a man appears just standing on the edge of my path glaring at me. He seems quite upset. I call to him, " Where am I?" He replies, "On my path". Confused, I ask, "Where does the path lead" and he smiles " That my dearest friend is up to you." April 12, 2013

When I awoke from that I felt angry and confused as to why I was angry. Every night after that and multiple times while meditating I found myself back there, always right where I had left off and the man was always within sight though he only spoke to me a few more times. I traveled this path many times seeming to gain something from the experience everytime. Most importantly this path and this man taught me the true meaning of unconditional love for myself and for others though as in all others. I was given a true gift in that one day a boy whom I had fought with many times in the past and done many ugly things to came to me and he shoved me. He was clearly angry and planning to take it out on me. I hugged him and told him I loved him. He immediately recoiled and made manu homophobic remarks to which I simply assured him that I have no romantic interests in him, but I love him for being him. A few days later he contacted me on facebook telling me his father had passed and asking if I would hang out. I did and what was once my worst enemy ended up crying on my shoulder for almost an hour.
That is not all that my unconditional love for self and others has granted me. I gained the strength to deal with my emotions without the use of drugs and quit cold turkey. Unconditional love is a drug itself.

I do not wish to preach to anyone, I just wish to reiterate what mzny wise men have said before me: love yourself and love others. I promise, true love can change your life.

One last thing, I am not religious and I do not believe this was any kind of religious experience. I simply had a very wise man teach me a very useful tool at a critical time in my life. If anyone has questions or would like to hear more of my story I would be happy to share.

Thank you for reading and I hope somebody gains from my story and experience.

I love you all.
Welcome to Astral Chat! / Think With the Heart
October 27, 2012, 22:16:31
I was watching "Spirit Science" a while back and came upon an episode that mentioned you could "think" with your heart. Being the curious little scamp that I am, I decided I would give it a try and I was very surprised with the results.
When I first tried it, I simply set more focus on my heart and something changed; it was as if my body already knew how to do this, even wanted to. This shift felt natural. A smile spread across my face and the feeling of ease and bliss filled me. I couldn't believe what I had stumbled upon!
I've been doing this more and more each day, and within just a few days, my friends had commented on a change in my demeanor. They said I seem more compassionate and peaceful, granted they think it's weird, but I feel great and I am infinitely more patient.

I know that some of you will probably think this is simply a placebo effect from watching the video, but if you're skeptical, why not try it out? Simply think using your heart, if you don't like it, or if you think it's pointless, go back to your old ways, but maybe, just maybe, you'll discover what I have and you too can share in this gift.

If anyone else has had this shift, please feel free to share how it makes you feel. Also, anyone that thinks I'm full of it, feel free to share that too.  :wink:

Good day, and happy travels.
I'm admittedly a newbie when it comes to chakras. I've meditated, and done energy work, but I have never target a specific energy center, or chakra. Honestly, I don't know where to begin, so I want to enlist the help of The Pulse.

What are your favorite resources regarding chakras?
(Brownie points for sources targeted towards learning and developing for newbies.)
Welcome to Dreams! / Picking Up Energy During LD
August 03, 2012, 05:20:58
     I became lucid while dreaming last night. Almost immediately I realized there was a lot of sexual energy, but it was foreign and not the typical horny teenager type energy that I'm used too. (Please excuse the crudeness.) Anyways, I continued with the dream but eventually woke myself up because I didn't like how strong the energy was getting.

I asked a friend that I had been talking to whether he had any sexual thoughts about me while we were talking the day before and he admitted to having a crush on me. He's gay and knows I'm not so he tried to keep his feelings a secret.

Is it weird that I almost knew for certain that it was his energy even though he wasn't in my dream?
Has anyone else encountered similar energy intrusions?
As I write this, I haven't eaten anything for 33 hours.
I haven't slept in the past 20 hours. (Not quite a day, but I'm not sleeping for at least another 8-12 hours.)

Note this wasn't by choice. I have no food in the house, nor means to get food right now and I couldn't even begin to sleep though I feel like a zombie because the heartburn... acid erosion? reflux?... is quite painful.

Surprisingly I stopped being hungry about 4-5 hours ago, which surprises me and kind of worries me at the same time. I fear if I eat now, it's probably going to make me quite ill.

This may cause my horrible insomnia to return. I used to stay awake 2-5 days straight until I would crash standing up. I refuse to take meds unless I absolutely have to. It seems that the lack of food, while keeping me awake, is drastically speeding up the effects of sleep deprivation. I'm already having a hard time focusing and I can tell I'm not quite all "there" in the head.

Anyways, I just wanted to get some feedback and perhaps some suggestions as I'm just a kid a know my limitations in the rational thought department.
Recently, I've arrived at a point in my journey where it feels as though I've taken a step back and I'm not having experiences as I used to.

I can attempt to attribute this to either of these things: Taking a few days off from doing any meditation or energy exercise; or I've become to accustomed and dare I say bored with where I'm at. (Pre AP/OOBE  phases)

Does anyone else here experience times where you feel like you're in a low point or "rusty" with your practices?
Welcome to Dreams! / Very Crazy Dream
July 07, 2012, 04:02:03
I'm just going to give a (not so) brief rundown of my craziest dream to date from my POV:

[Interior of unknown car sitting in a parking lot of a church on the top of the mountain I live on] I'm sitting in the drivers seat. Beside me sits my male friend and beside him sits a female that I perceive to be a friend of his. Leaning against the passenger door is another female, also a friend. We're all talking, but nothing in particular, then for some reason the car begins to fly and I realize that I'm driving it.

We head towards the bottom of the mountain, flying over a pine tree forest and occasional houses that I know very well. Somehow, the girl is still holding onto the outside of the car. (I know she is there and she is engaged in conversation with my two friends but I'm not paying attention.) All of a sudden, the car banks left and I feel I'm losing control, it takes a moment for me to realize that the girl has fallen off and crashed down into the woods. I say aloud, " Your friend is probably dead." (Harsh and random,eh?) The car ends up crashing to the ground, somehow avoiding the trees.

My two friends and I are alright, and I take off running in the direction of the second girl, the one that fell. I expect to find a dead body, but the girl is alive, but had a bad cut in her leg and was pretty banged up. Uncharacteristically, I take charge of the situation without hesitation, and tell my male friend to stop the bleeding while I go get help. I run up a steep slope towards a street in the distance. I arrive at the back of the house which has a fenced in side yard. I hop the fence and run towards the street, hopping another fence on my way. When I hop the second fence, I am met by a man with a gun pointed towards me that says, " Tell me what you're doing or I'll kill you where you stand." I don't answer. Then he seems to change a bit and asks, "Do ya need help?" I say yes and quickly explain the situation and ask to use his phone. He replies, " I'm busy, ask my neighbor."

I turn around, noticing suddenly a much smaller shack-like house with a boy in kind of ragged- clothing and basically no face standing out front. The yard is less clean and well groomed and as I take all this in, the dream fades.

This dream was so crazy, but also so amazingly vivid and in color that I thought I had to share it.
***[This thread is suited for mature viewers.]***

Beer, wine, liquor, or whatever strikes your fancy, most of us have had a considerable amount of experience with alcohol and know the brain numbing affects that it may have on us.  I'm going to explain my exerience, if you would like to skip it, just find the "TL;DR."

I found myself a couple of days ago with a horrid hangover and apparently a mild case of alcohol poisoning, so naturally I took an aleve and tried to sleep it off. Oddly enough, when I closed my eyes, I would almost immediately get considerably vivid visuals almost of a clairvoyant nature. I repeated this many times, even covering my eyes to make sure that there was no light teasing my eyelids, and sure enough, the visuals got more clear.

Now, I had... lost my stomach... quite a few times that morning and was quite dehydrated, which also probably played a role in my experience.

- Has anyone had an unexplained experience when under the influence or after being under the influence of alcohol?
Bordmb's Meditation Experiment

To explore how long I can meditate uninterrupted and without breaking my mental state.

Enter a meditative state around 21:00 and maintain the state for a minimum of 4 hours without falling asleep.

Take in no liquid or food starting at 19:00. Do energy exercises starting at 20:30. Generally prepare mentally to enter a trance state and any other possible outcomes of the meditation.

Other Information
My longest sustained meditation prior to this is roughly 2 hours. I'm entering this in a serene mood and no expectations of what's to come. I decided to try this for a few reasons, but mainly to show myself that I am truly capable of more than I give myself credit for, and I have been holding myself back with expectations and preconceived notions.

If anyone has advice or questions before I begin, please past them. I'll update this thread with the result of my meditation sometime after I'm finished, probably tomorrow.

I've created a place in my mind, henceforth called my forest, I use for run downs and a portion of it I've set aside for general meditation. Now, during my meditation earlier, I achieved F10 and at the time my forest seemed like a very vivid thought that when I tried to engage all of my senses at once would take on very vivid qualities but they still just stayed more like an extremely vivid thought; however, now that I am thinking back on it, it seems even more clear and almost like I actually experienced it.

I'm wondering if this is how it usually is. I will admit that I was trying to get a true visual, but I maintained the blackness throughout the experience. I can see very clearly my forest though, and at the time I could picture it vividly and it was almost as though I was there but not fully. Is this F12 (Monroe) and I was almost in focus 2 (Frank). At times I would completely be gone and snap back to a consciousness that is slightly below F10 with little memory of what had happened.

I suppose my question is how does it feel to see, but not through your physical eyes?

I'm sorry if this is just a long rambling, but I'm new to this and it is extremely complicated for me to explain what I mean.   :oops:
Welcome to Astral Chat! / The Gateway Series
June 24, 2012, 21:21:18
I recently got my hands on the complete Gateway Series. I just finished listening to Wave I- Discovery 1, and I must say, it is like the disc completely guides me and takes all of the effort and confusion out of it. On this first exercise, I went to focus 3 (Monroe model) and for the first time, I wasn't analyzing what was going on or second guessing myself. This is a wonderful series and I was wondering if anyone else has used it and any stories regarding it.
I just woke up, around 20 minutes ago from my first successful journey into focus 10. (Mind awake/ body asleep) I'm sure it may seem silly to be excited about this, but previously when thinking about F10, I thought it was a boring place to jump to another focus. I've found that this is false, much to my joyous amusement.

Just to recount how it went: I started off by covering my eyes because they were feeling fluttery. I then relaxed my body and waited as all the twitches and itches came and went, and slowly but surely, they passed and I stopped realizing my body, for lack of a better word. It was kind of a sudden burst and suddenly the blackness around me took on a different shape and it seemed as if my head had actually gained weight. ( Not my physical head and perhaps mass would be a more appropriate word than weight) I was only very vaguely aware of my body by this point, and would only occasionally become aware of my breathing, but when this happened it dulled the patterns I was seeing in the darkness. My thoughts kept taking on vivid dream-like qualities but they seemed very far away and not at all as though I could jump into them. I tried to project both to the street outside of my house and to an unspecified destination, both unsuccessful, but when I tried, my experience got slightly more intense in a way that's just too hard to describe right now.

I'm sorry for the long post and I would like to thank Xanth for pointing me to all the great resources.
   I was first  interested in AP and OOBE about a year ago, but as I had only read a few articles, and none from this site, I soon gave up assuming I couldn't do it. Anyways, I never  fully lost interest and have recently started keeping a dream journal, which has done wonders for how I perceive and remember my dreams.

Three nights ago, and every night since, I have devoted anywhere from 1-3 hours alone in my  room with minimal noise to try to induce an OOBE. Mostly, my body falls asleep, ( I assume) and then if I try to separate absolutely nothing happens. No vibrations or anything. Other than that I am also having troubles with my eyes constantly being restless and never wanting to stay closed  on their own.

My usual routine goes something like this:
1. Lay down on my back and cover  up to my chest and have my arms parallel to my body.
2. Close my eyes and  remain still while focusing on my breathing or trying to keep my  mind  clear. ( Not Easy, but doable)
3. Wait for body to fall asleep.  ( Now here is another one of my questions. I have never had sleep paralysis, and the extent of my body falling asleep is an  extremely heavy and pleasantly warm/ numb feeling only strong in my legs.)
4. Try to separate; fail miserably, roll over and sleep and hope for success in LD.

What am I doing wrong or what could I improve on?

Please don't suggest binuaral beats.