How to get angry at will?

[Seeker of Matter]

I had this thought while I was out running 30 minutes. How do you get angry at will? I figured that I would be able to run much better if I was angry.

The thing is that I am not a very angry person. Or said in another way I do not get angry in situations where normal people will get angry and that alone is annoying for me. I am a very "closed" person. If somebody does something to me I never yell back at them or hit stuff or anything. I usually blame myself of what is happening and I try as hard as possible to find some sort of logic to what has just happened. It ends up in despair most of the time. I even felt it now when I was out running. I felt pain but I knew that my body was capable of keeping running and perhaps even faster! But for some reason I stopped and had to catch my breath again. I got so annoyed with myself for not being able to run on but that did not make me angry, it just made me frustrated. I wanted to be angry but I couldn't.

How do I turn this constant chatter of "control" and "self blaming" that's going on in my head OFF? I must say that it feels like I am choking especially now when I am aware of it. I am tired of being so endlessly passive and not being able to feel the realize of rage. It is ages since I have really cried or screamed or destroyed something out of fury.

How do I get angry?

[shekter]

I'm not really one to give any advice to you because, well, I'm just like you.

I'll be thrown into circumstances that *make* me angry, but I don't let the anger rise to the surface. i just will it away or something.

But in my humble opinion, what I think we need to do is to just let go and not give a crap what other people will think when we let our rage flow.

Though letting go can be hard...

[Kris]

getting angry is so easy... well for most people..

i get angry when i lose (sad, i know)

i hate losing

[WalkerInTheWoods]

Cultivating anger is not a positive thing. If you focus on becoming angry then you will become a more angry person. Anger is hot and volatile. Anger is about losing control. Have you not read the countless terrible things that happen all because people got angry? You should be grateful you are not an angry person.

[surfer8]

Hi Seeker,
When I first scanned your post I too thought that you were on the wrong track. Then I read it again with my "other" head.

You seem to have the pent up frustration and emotion of anger but it's all trapped inside, focused inwards.
And the more you recognise this, the more you feel the "blockage" and the need to let it out.

If you had come to me for healing, I would either work with you myself over time try and breakdown whatever is causing you to 'not' release the anger. And this could possibly be something in you personal history that has "taught" you that to express outward anger or loss of self control is always 'bad'.
(Therapists are very good at helping you out with this kind of issue).

Alternatively, you might look at laughter as a short term release, that might then give you the breathing space to address the longer term approach.
This is a close emotional release mechanism to anger and I've seen "laughter workshops" create amazing results (this guy is good..http://www.joehoare.co.uk/)

I am NOT a psycho-therapist or trained psychologist. So do take my advice as my opinion only.  

My recommendation would be to seriously consider a therapist to help you unlock the emotional response or if you prefer not to, check out some workshops in your area to find some release.  The fact that you recognise the issue and are ready to ask for help, would tell me that you're well on the way to recovery already.

so relax my friend and seek out what you feel most comfortable doing within your own soul.

with love
Surfer8

[Seeker of Matter]

Thanks for the replies. I am not trying to find ways of doing damage to people of things. I am looking for a new way "tunnelling" my feelings so that I won't be so self blaming and thus self-destructive.

The problem is that it would seem very weird for a guy like me to suddenly show those kinds of feelings, not only to myself but certainly also for the people around me. The morals I have been brought up with does not allow anger to be released. Anger is something that has to be controlled and kept inside, but it is cluttering up inside of me (cliché I know). Would it be fair to call this an anger problem? Because I am certainly not in control of it.

I am not quite sure whether it is serious enough to seek professional help. It is not like I am dying from it, but it is indeed frustrating. Talking about it seems to help though. I am even keeping a diary! I have written in it for over a year now, quite a collection of words I must say

But still writing only seems to lessen the pain a bit. I have a feeling that the real problem requires some more physical action.

[Seeker of Matter]

Nice article dealing with the "what"-part of anger. Now I just need the "how"-part =)

[Ben K]

this is a really bonking easy question to answer. il give it to you straight up.

Purchase and install counterstrike 1.6

Go into a server with people who play a decent amount of time.

Get your butt WHOOPEDDDDD.

Proceed to either cry like a baby or punch your moniter in as long as their is an emotional investment(as in, you actually TRY to play) you will get ticked off.

Just one idea, ive got PLEENNNTY more that are guarenteed to work.

and dont listen to that crazy guy telling you you'r crazy. you'r fine.

[Ybom]

Seeker of Matter,
1; I want to shake your hand. You are able to think of yourself before others, especially when it involves anger. More people should be like this.

2; Do you know how to get angry at yourself? I mean is this self-blame to the level that it causes you to want to punch a pillow?
-If no, then you do not truly feel the effects of this blame. It may be annoying but learning to ignore it or even to turn it off will have quite a few side effects you would otherwise not expect. Be careful what you wish for.
-If yes, then you know what it's like to be angry. You need to channel and focus on this, since you know very well what it feels like.

3; I'm sure we can help you here, but it's not going to be an overmonth solution. It will probably take upwards of a few years to completely resolve this, especially if it's not handled in a full time manner.

[JKK]

I think theres a diff between getting angry and 'pumping yourself up' if you're looking for something in physical activity..just mentally pump yourself up before doing it..anger is pretty easy to get into..but I don't see too many positives obviously