A couple more early morning 'roll outs'. False awakenings or real AP?

[VXS]

I haven't really had an opportunity to experiment with the 'indirect' method since my last post. For the last couple of weeks I haven't had many lucid dreams, and I've been either fully asleep or fully conscious and never in between.

I always keep somewhat of an intention to try to get out of my body, if I get a chance. I usually think about it especially if I wake up in the early hours before it is time to wake up. I think that it might have finally happened again this morning after a while.

I remember trying several times (and remember, whatever I describe now is just based on a memory so take it with a grain of salt). I remember 'rolling out' of my bed a few times, with varying degrees of success.

The first time I rolled out to the right side of my bed and hit the floor. During the first few seconds I am always blind, as my physical eyes are closed and the experience begins with me coming out of a dream realizing that I am in my bed. I hit the floor, on my hands and knees as usual, and could barely see anything. I quickly remembered to apply some of the techniques that I learned. I started to rub my eyes together in front of my face, and as I did so my vision became clearer. I yelled out the command "clarity now!" (although I did not really yell as I had no voice), when I did this I got a MUCH clearer vision of my room, although not as clear and vivid as 'real' life. I kept rubbing my hands and I repeated the command...however I could not make the vision more vivid after a certain point. I looked over at my bedside table, which was next to the side I landed on. I saw pictures that I had up there. At this point I kind of lost control of my movement, and started to slowly float up and over my bed. My vision was fixed straight upwards, and I felt like I was losing control as well as visual clarity. As I slowly floated across my bed, I started to see some black cloudy stuff entering my field of vision from the left side (meaning it would've been floating over where my physical body was lying). I got a little scared, as I did not want to see anything scary, and I was instantly back in my body and awake, ending the experience. Before going back to sleep I looked to the side of my bed where the bedside table was...those pictures are no longer there, I moved them a few months ago. Weird. So at least some aspect of the experience was not 'real'.

During the next few hours of the morning I was in and out of consciousness, occasionally becoming lucid during some of my dreams. When I did realize that I was dreaming, I would try and think of myself back in my bed asleep to try and get out of my body. A few times this woke me up fully, a few times I would become aware of myself asleep in bed, but then drift off and lose consciousness before I could make an exit attempt.

The second roll out felt physically very real. I remember thinking "I might actually hurt myself", thinking it was my physical body rolling out and I would crack my head on the floor and wake up fully. No such thing happened, as I felt myself hit the floor this time on the left side of my bed. I repeated the techniques to try and get my sight and senses, and I found myself looking at my room once again. This time I turned to look at my bed where my physical body was supposed to be. I did not see myself lying there, in fact I saw my pillow where it should be but the bed itself was empty. Weird. I walked out of my room and across the hallway to the next bedroom. I did not see anyone in this room either, which is strange because someone was in fact sleeping there. I looked at the window in this bedroom and decided I was going to try and fly out of it. When I tried to do so, things started to get more fuzzy and dream-like, and I felt like I was starting to lose vision and control. I repeated the hand rubbing and 'clarity now' and regained my senses...it seemed like I had not left the second bedroom at all and was still staring at the window. The experience that I thought I was starting to have by flying outside was still outside the window, and it felt like the window itself was a giant flat screen tv. There were scenes going on through there, but I apparently could not get out. It was just a projected picture.

I walked back out of the bedroom and looked down the stairs at the downstairs landing. I noticed that there were shoes there, as there usually are. I jumped from the top of the stairs, thinking I would fly down, but instead it seemed like 'gravity' kicked in and I just fell and landed downstairs. It seemed like daytime, and it was not dark at all. I looked at the dining table as I passed by it, there were a few plates out on the table with cookies in them (strange). As I turned to the kitchen I saw someone standing at the sink, with their back towards me. This is the first 'person' that I have seen during these few experiences. It appeared to be a woman, but I did not recognize her. I could not see her face, but she had black hair and appeared to be relatively young and attractive from behind. As I describe this now it feels pretty creepy, but I do not remember feeling fear at the time. I decided I was going to try and see her face, and as I walked towards her she did not turn around to face me. At this point I started to get a little bit scared and apprehensive, not wanting to see something out of a horror movie turn around and reveal itself to me. Acting with trepidation, I reached out to tap her on the shoulder and braced for the worst. Boom, as soon as my hand touched her shoulder I was back in my bed and conscious once again. At this point I should have forced myself awake and written down the experience immediately while it still felt vivid and real. Unfortunately I did not have the discipline and I dozed back to sleep. I remember the details I have described of these two 'projections' relatively clearly, although the experiences themselves now seem kind of hazy and distant.

Overall I am having difficulty with prolonging these short experiences, and I seem to return to my body rather quickly. I think there is an aspect of fear that is involuntarily waking me back up. I'm ok with this since I do not want to have a bad experience, and hopefully with more practice I will overcome my fears more and be able to venture out farther and for a long period of time. It is interesting that the two times I have tried to fly out of my house (this morning, and in my post from a couple weeks ago), I have triggered some sort of 'error' which reset me back to an earlier part of the experience. 

Again, thanks for reading for those who do. I am mostly trying to journal some of these experiences so that it will excite me enough to keep trying. Putting this down into words seems to solidify everything more, so I can come back and realize these things actually happened and it wasn't just a couple of weird dreams I had once and then forgot about. I'll try and visit this board more often, but again I haven't really had an experience between my last post and now. I'm enjoying reading some posts of other people's experiences, but lately all the 'horrible experience' titled threads make me think I should not be getting someone else's scary thoughts in my head and I should just experiment on my own.

[Pauli2]

Request "Awareness now!".

Next time u see a person, ask: "What do you represent?"

[Tee1234]

I haven't really had an opportunity to experiment with the 'indirect' method since my last post. For the last couple of weeks I haven't had many lucid dreams, and I've been either fully asleep or fully conscious and never in between.

I always keep somewhat of an intention to try to get out of my body, if I get a chance. I usually think about it especially if I wake up in the early hours before it is time to wake up. I think that it might have finally happened again this morning after a while.

I remember trying several times (and remember, whatever I describe now is just based on a memory so take it with a grain of salt). I remember 'rolling out' of my bed a few times, with varying degrees of success.

The first time I rolled out to the right side of my bed and hit the floor. During the first few seconds I am always blind, as my physical eyes are closed and the experience begins with me coming out of a dream realizing that I am in my bed. I hit the floor, on my hands and knees as usual, and could barely see anything. I quickly remembered to apply some of the techniques that I learned. I started to rub my eyes together in front of my face, and as I did so my vision became clearer. I yelled out the command "clarity now!" (although I did not really yell as I had no voice), when I did this I got a MUCH clearer vision of my room, although not as clear and vivid as 'real' life. I kept rubbing my hands and I repeated the command...however I could not make the vision more vivid after a certain point. I looked over at my bedside table, which was next to the side I landed on. I saw pictures that I had up there. At this point I kind of lost control of my movement, and started to slowly float up and over my bed. My vision was fixed straight upwards, and I felt like I was losing control as well as visual clarity. As I slowly floated across my bed, I started to see some black cloudy stuff entering my field of vision from the left side (meaning it would've been floating over where my physical body was lying). I got a little scared, as I did not want to see anything scary, and I was instantly back in my body and awake, ending the experience. Before going back to sleep I looked to the side of my bed where the bedside table was...those pictures are no longer there, I moved them a few months ago. Weird. So at least some aspect of the experience was not 'real'.

During the next few hours of the morning I was in and out of consciousness, occasionally becoming lucid during some of my dreams. When I did realize that I was dreaming, I would try and think of myself back in my bed asleep to try and get out of my body. A few times this woke me up fully, a few times I would become aware of myself asleep in bed, but then drift off and lose consciousness before I could make an exit attempt.

The second roll out felt physically very real. I remember thinking "I might actually hurt myself", thinking it was my physical body rolling out and I would crack my head on the floor and wake up fully. No such thing happened, as I felt myself hit the floor this time on the left side of my bed. I repeated the techniques to try and get my sight and senses, and I found myself looking at my room once again. This time I turned to look at my bed where my physical body was supposed to be. I did not see myself lying there, in fact I saw my pillow where it should be but the bed itself was empty. Weird. I walked out of my room and across the hallway to the next bedroom. I did not see anyone in this room either, which is strange because someone was in fact sleeping there. I looked at the window in this bedroom and decided I was going to try and fly out of it. When I tried to do so, things started to get more fuzzy and dream-like, and I felt like I was starting to lose vision and control. I repeated the hand rubbing and 'clarity now' and regained my senses...it seemed like I had not left the second bedroom at all and was still staring at the window. The experience that I thought I was starting to have by flying outside was still outside the window, and it felt like the window itself was a giant flat screen tv. There were scenes going on through there, but I apparently could not get out. It was just a projected picture.

I walked back out of the bedroom and looked down the stairs at the downstairs landing. I noticed that there were shoes there, as there usually are. I jumped from the top of the stairs, thinking I would fly down, but instead it seemed like 'gravity' kicked in and I just fell and landed downstairs. It seemed like daytime, and it was not dark at all. I looked at the dining table as I passed by it, there were a few plates out on the table with cookies in them (strange). As I turned to the kitchen I saw someone standing at the sink, with their back towards me. This is the first 'person' that I have seen during these few experiences. It appeared to be a woman, but I did not recognize her. I could not see her face, but she had black hair and appeared to be relatively young and attractive from behind. As I describe this now it feels pretty creepy, but I do not remember feeling fear at the time. I decided I was going to try and see her face, and as I walked towards her she did not turn around to face me. At this point I started to get a little bit scared and apprehensive, not wanting to see something out of a horror movie turn around and reveal itself to me. Acting with trepidation, I reached out to tap her on the shoulder and braced for the worst. Boom, as soon as my hand touched her shoulder I was back in my bed and conscious once again. At this point I should have forced myself awake and written down the experience immediately while it still felt vivid and real. Unfortunately I did not have the discipline and I dozed back to sleep. I remember the details I have described of these two 'projections' relatively clearly, although the experiences themselves now seem kind of hazy and distant.

Overall I am having difficulty with prolonging these short experiences, and I seem to return to my body rather quickly. I think there is an aspect of fear that is involuntarily waking me back up. I'm ok with this since I do not want to have a bad experience, and hopefully with more practice I will overcome my fears more and be able to venture out farther and for a long period of time. It is interesting that the two times I have tried to fly out of my house (this morning, and in my post from a couple weeks ago), I have triggered some sort of 'error' which reset me back to an earlier part of the experience. 

Again, thanks for reading for those who do. I am mostly trying to journal some of these experiences so that it will excite me enough to keep trying. Putting this down into words seems to solidify everything more, so I can come back and realize these things actually happened and it wasn't just a couple of weird dreams I had once and then forgot about. I'll try and visit this board more often, but again I haven't really had an experience between my last post and now. I'm enjoying reading some posts of other people's experiences, but lately all the 'horrible experience' titled threads make me think I should not be getting someone else's scary thoughts in my head and I should just experiment on my own.

Fear is definitely the #1 reason to get shot back to your body, awaken and end the experience. There's no doubt in my mind thats why it ended. When you tapped on her shoulder you were thinkn it was gonna be scary so it just ended.

The only way to prolong it is to remain fearless -but you already know that. Its ok to be scared, just dont let it take over. Its when you start to panic and get anxious is when it will end. Even if you tapped her and she turned around with the scariest face you ever seen, still remain calm. This stuff is gonna happen just dont ever lose your cool. If I were you Id actually be confronting anything scary I come across just to get you used to not freakn out.

My 2 rules while projecting, especially if im planning on doing it for a while. Dont let nothing freak me out, and no sex. Those 2 are quick tickets back to your body. You can be scared or excited just never let it take over.

Another thing to remember if something does happen and you find yourself back in your body-awake. Just lay there and dont move. If you didnt open your eyes yet , keep em closed. You can project very easily from this state as you drift back off. Sometimes seconds or minutes.

[VXS]

I think I might have exited again this morning. I keep saying might because the first thought I have upon awakening is doubt that I had a 'real' experience.

I was in and out of sleep a few times this morning, and during my waking time I made an intent to try and exit. I tried to roll several times, but I felt that extreme heaviness and lethargy of sleep paralysis. A few times I was unable to move at all before falling into a deeper sleep, a few times I actually moved my physical body and therefore disturbed my attempt.

I decided to cycle a few of Raduga's techniques instead of just rolling. I tried to will my mind to stay aware while I did so (I repeated the mantra 'mind awake, body asleep'). I tried to imagine my arm wiggling first, even though in reality it was under my pillow and head. I couldn't 'imagine' hard enough to see or feel my arm moving in front of me. I moved on to another technique, I tried to imagine myself swimming the breaststroke out of my body. I REALLY couldn't imagine or visualize that at all. After a few seconds of trying to swim, I switched back to wiggling my arm. I felt some movement and immediately, instinctively 'sat up' on the edge of my bed. Wow.

As usual I could not see anything. I rubbed my hands together and said 'awareness now'. I actually heard my voice this time, as I never have before. I did not gain vision immediately, but I started to move anyway. By the time I got to the stairs I had nearly full vision. My vision materialized in a strange way, in different areas of my field filling in first with other 'blind spots' filling in later. By the time I got to the bottom of the stairs I realized that I had never had such sharp realistic vision in one of these experiences. I had my full awareness, I 'knew' I was successfully out of my body, I knew roughly what time it was in the morning, and I told myself that I would recount and write down the experience as soon as I woke up.

The living room at the bottom of the stairs seemed distorted in some way from reality. Perhaps like a mirror image of its true form. I did not spend much time observing, I ran through my house trying to get as far as possible before the experience ended. I did however notice my cat in the living room looking at me. As I passed the kitchen I looked for the woman at the sink from my last trip. There was nobody there. I ran to the back of the house towards a large window and dived through it, trusting that I would pass safely through to the other side. I did in fact make it through, and ended up on my back porch. It was daytime and the sun was bright outside. I jumped up in the air with one arm out in attempt to fly like superman, as expected I began to float up and away from my house. I did not get very far as I noticed that my experience started to fade and my vision started to lose clarity. I started to rub my hands together and tried to look at them in attempt to deepen the experience. This worked for a while, and the experience continued to be vivid.

I flew backwards, I was facing my starting point while flying away from it. Suddenly in the distant sky I saw a dark figure flying towards me. I hate to say it, it sounds so cliche here (and probably was influenced by everything I've read) but it was a wispy hooded figure. He was also flying horizontal like superman, and he seemed to fly aerodynamically like an airplane. Instead of an airplane exhaust, the hooded figure was trailed by a prismatic or rainbow trail. As the figure got closer, I saw a second identical one materialize from the distance. It was like 2 fighter jets were scrambled to intercept me after they noticed I was out of my body and flying. They reminded me of those flying prison guards from Harry Potter. I didn't feel scared necessarily, but I was a bit apprehensive as the first one was now getting close and coming at me quite fast. I tried to ask 'what do you represent', but no voice came out of my mouth. I did not feel scared because I knew I could just wake up if things got intense. That is exactly what I did, as the first figure collided into me. As the experience faded out, my vision was filled with the rainbow colors of his flight trail.

During the whole experience I was aware of my vision being very clear. I knew roughly what time of day it was and that I had made previous failed exit attempts that morning. I was telling myself that I would recount the entire thing when I woke up. And I felt similarities to my previous experiences of having vision come in and go out. Nevertheless, my first instinct upon awakening was "oh, well I guess that was just a dream." 

[Xanth]

I think I might have exited again this morning. I keep saying might because the first thought I have upon awakening is doubt that I had a 'real' experience.

Never doubt yourself.

If you feel that you were somewhere that wasn't this "physical reality" and you had full awareness of that fact, then you certainly had a non-physical experience. 

Always go with your gut instinct.

My gut instinct says you had a projection, a good one too.  Congratulations. 

[Greytraveller]

Hallo VXS

Your description of the experience in the last post is consistent with that of an OBE. Based on that I'd say that you Did have an OBE. I've also noticed from my own experiences and other that OBEs do tend to happen in 'bunches'. Meaning that when an OBE occurs on one night it is quite likely that several more OBEs will happen in the next few days/nights. So be alert to the possibility of more OBEs happening soon.
Regards 
Grey

[VXS]

Thanks everyone, for reading, and for your responses.

Yeah, I really do think there is something here, which is why I continue to post. I've had at least 4 distinct experiences now, and every time the sensations are familiar and consistent with what they were the time before. Once I learned that it was easy to exit upon awakening, it's like I instinctively know how to do it. In fact, one of the reasons why my logical mind wants to dismiss it is because it seems too simple...it seems too familiar as if I had experienced it all before. Perhaps I've projected all of my life but never been aware of it and just dismissed it as another one of my dreams. I've definitely had that flying sensation before, through vivid and spectacular landscapes. However, I never had the awareness of a fully awake mind like I have in the past few weeks.

There's definitely something to this. The chances that I just read some stuff on the internet then had 4 nearly identical vivid lucid dreams within a few weeks? (A dream where I feel myself falling out of my body, run out of my room through the rest of the house and have to 'maintain' my vision by rubbing my hands?) It would be unprecedented, my imagination has never been that powerful.