I am being haunted by a man's doppleganger....

[Leyla]

Paraphrased:

What neffie is saying is, a man she knows is unconsciously projecting out of body and sexually harassing her.

He is also sexually harassing her in real-life, and seems to be obsessed.

She also thinks he may have stalked her in previous lives.

[Starlite_Neffie]

So, here's an experience my friend feels is worth sharing:

There is a man I know. I've actually known him for many, many past lives, but I didn't know that when I met him. That is to say I didn't consciously believe that-- when I met him I didn't believe in past lives. I saw visions of them when I was around him, but I didn't attribute these visions to any "past life". Later, through many other experiences, I would change this interpretation though.

The circumstances of knowing him in past lives, as well as this one, have been trying to say the least. I jokingly tell everyone that him and I have "been at war since the 1880's". This is not far from the truth though. I often question if we weren't put on earth to make each other's lives living hell. Alone we are very intense, volitile people at times, fairly paranoid, and have been through a lot; combined we have enough tension to create nuclear fusion. And, as ironic as this sounds, we seem very psychically "connected". I don't know how to explain that. We just "are".

There is truly something weird going on.

I "remember" past lives, the more recent ones, I've had with him, and the frightening things he did to me then. These images and memories would come to me often in this one, and in many ways his demeanor has not changed, and I often for years avoided him and never spoke to him.

That is, not to his face, and body. Nor any other means of "empirical" communication.

Since I met him in 1998, I would notice I believed he was "around" me. But this was a very specific thing I did not really give weight to until my friend, Leyla, helped me realize what may be going on. I already had a fear of him as it was from the beginning. This may have appeared to an outsider to be based on the few things he said and did around me before I began to avoid him, but this is not the reason. I began to fear him from these past life visions alone; although what he suggested to me then in my present life was getting more and more controlling and disturbing...

I began to see his image, at night, around my house. He would be in every dark place I looked, grabbing at me in the dark. I had so many fears and problems at the time that I had become complacent to this, but it frightened me. He wasn't in my bed at night; nor was he in the bathroom. But everytime I got up to use the bathroom he was lurking in the stairwell, staring at me silently, still. As I moved past he would "grab" at me, and follow me up to the bathroom, but not in it.

In real life early on, in 1998, he had made such suggestions and descriptions to me that having this kind of "fear" would not seem necessarily unexpected. And yet this was more than a "fear", it was as if his actual being existed there, and could touch me. I could feel it grabbing me. It was also as if his entity could be in more than one place, possibly within everywhere there was darkness. His entity both looked like an image of him I had from real life, and like nothing at all, simply the darkness. In real life he later changed his physical presentation, but this image has never changed since 1998. I've had much other sexual harassment, and, mostly, I have never felt anything like this happen with anyone else...

While this happened, and as the years went by, I mostly avoided him in real life, as everytime I saw him he was so sexually obsessed that it could not be normal or comfortable. We fought about that, but no matter how I expressed myself, he refused to not let the sexual thing die, he seemed so incapable of not talking about sex with me I began to think he had some sort of disorder... Everytime I was physically near him I would shake, and my teeth would chatter, and that's still true to this day. But he would almost never touch me in anyway. He would never "grab" me like his entity would.

Meanwhile, I am flooded with visions of things I attributed then to past lives, memories of him stalking and raping in the past two... They were so detailed and vivid, and I would dream of them as well. Since I avoided him almost entirely for years, these were not really based on anything he said or did in this life. He did not stalk me in this life, ever, nor do I believe he ever would. He definately did not rape me.

But within these visions I could relive these entire events, down to hearing a phrase from him repeated over and over and over and over and over again in my head, a phrase that would make me angry with rage just as it went through me...

And his entity, that was always in the darkness of my house, would say this to me too.

Years went by, and I was so disturbed by this, it seemed dumb. I hardly knew him in this life, and I knew I had intense fears from something that to most laypeople never even happened. I had gone through a lot since I met him, and I began to just want to face this: I found him right then [we *always* run into each other in the town], and began to talk to him, for the first time.

This really, really surprised him, I suppose, and immediately he wisked me away to try to take me to hotels, and things... I refused to do that as much as I could then, just trying to simply be in the same room with him was enerving. Well, whatever. One day I'm in his car, and it's about to be a re-enactment of 1910... Out of his mouth for the first time in this life are the exact same words, and tones he said in the past one... As he tries to get me to do the same thing exactly.

Fortunately, I feel a lot had changed between us. And as enerving, controlling, condescending, manipulative, etc as I want to complain this pain-in-the-butt is, he thank god did not force me to do anything. That alone changed my perspective on him a great deal in this life. He harassed me about things to no end, and pushed and pushed as much as he could, but if I eventually screamed no, he backed away.

During this time the presense of his image around my house though actually left. And I was amazed. I believed then that embracing him and knowing him must have been the "right" thing to do, and that this was my fear, and I had to confront it.

Or was it something else...?

Needless to say, we fought on and off, and by the end of the summer we weren't speaking. I felt I was no longer afraid of him though, because to me I faced him, and resolved things a great deal. Maybe not totally, but it really was a breakthrough for me, and I stopped fearing being physically near him.

Then the "doppleganger" returns.

It's still in my house at home, whenever I'm there. It's not anywhere at my college dorm, as far as I notice. I never thought about it much, but it's not. It doesnt' seem to follow me too many places. But it's in my mother's house.

Anyway, Leyla thinks this is an actual part of this man's soul. As extreme as that sounds, I have a tendancy to agree!!! For a long time I questioned if this was my own projection. I believe that maybe I need to be me to "receive" this presense, but that there is really something there. It does the same thing all the time, trying to grab me in the dark....

Neffie