Possible core image difficult to push away-> neg ?

[Person]

Sounds like you picked one of your hardest blocks to start out with
Just curious.. was the block in your throat area?  That would relate to the blue color.  As you symbolically tear the memory apart, it's tearing apart all the emotions that link to it all at once.  The heart pounding etc. is normal.  However I don't know what the light was.  In my experience, I'll reach a black void of fear and the emotional rush will stop.  I then picture lighting a match, lighting the area to 'face the fear' and continue until there isn't any emotion left.  I'd suggest letting it absorb your awareness again and fully feeling all emotions that pour from it.. it'll slowly drain like a bucket of water and never come back.  Or if you still can't get it to turn, focus on a smaller issue, like the fear alone or embarassment alone.

[Kalonek]

Hello everyone !

I have just recieved my copy of PPSD and tried a few minutes ago my first core image detection exercise. When i first read about those core images of being trauma even of things going back to childhood, i thought immediately of one thing that happened to me when i was really young (a REALLY stupid thing) that lead me to a powerful phobia for the next 10 years approx. (it's ok now but i used to make a lot of nightmares of it) I'm totally fine with it now but i thought that it would be a perfect core image for a neg attachement.

So i did what is written in PPSD (i have a year of practice with body awareness so i don't think i'm missusing it at it works well with NEW for me), thinking back to this episode of my early childhood, feeling i was there, visualising it. Immediately i felt a little strange, like something wasn't going well. A few seconds only after i started, i felt a floating sensation in my body, like at the begining of a transe, but i hadn't did anything for it. I continue to make the exercise, and try to hold the image in my mind with my awareness hands to push it away. That's what make it all worse. In fact i tried to push, but it didn't move at all, in fact, the image was becoming brighter and blue, really bright, i pushed harder but nothing moved, in fact i happened to move it a very little, and the blue light i was trying to push became bigger and filled all my mind, i was surrounded, it absorbed me despite all my effort to push it back. It was too powerful for me. In background, i felt a strange feeling in my solar plexus center, like when i am frightened (but i wasnt really), and my heart center began to beat fast in background though not very powerfully, as if i was attempting an OBE).

I stopped pushing and relax a few seconds, but started again. I managed to push the image a little futher but it was really really hard, and it was surrounded with a kind of electrical movement. It became bigger again and i was absorbed another time, exhausted.

So my question is : what do you think of all this ? It is the normal stuff for early core images detection, like if the mind refuses it, or am i facing some big core image that i even don't manage to push away to turn it.

Thanks !