Projection Journal- tides2dust. Entries, Past Experiences, Notes and Questions

[tides2dust]

An OBE and strange sex dream. Interesting thoughts about the experience...

I had an OBE! I did not record it right away, I was so very- very tired. But I remember it fairly well.

I initially woke up because the boy dog was crying. I got up and used the restroom- went downstairs to see what the commotion was about. He was trying to wake my Dad up who fell asleep on the recliner. Paying no mind I went back to bed. I could feel how tired I was, and that I was completely aware of my body shutting back down to sleep. As if by habit, I pulled "my self" up from my bed. I got about half way "out" realizing- my physical self was still sleeping in bed. That's when it hit me I was being given an opportunity for an OBE. Wasting no time, I drudgingly pulled the rest of my self out. I was a little wobbly at first... But I was on a mission. I did not spend too much time feeling all the sensations as I usually do. Instead I looked at my door and put my hands in front of me- and I phased through my bedroom door. "Still remember how to do that" I tell my self. I glide down my stairs and don't even bother looking at my Dad asleep on his recliner, I do hear the TV on in the background, but instead I am now trying to phase through the front door. I push myself through and my one leg gets stuck, near the ankle, in the door! I'm being held up! And all I want to do is go up towards the stars.

Why did my leg get stuck? Next thing I know I'm back in my bed. Again, I do not hesitate. I realize my body is attempting to enter into a deep slumber, noting the position of my left arm behind my pillow- and again I pull myself back out of my body. Once more I phase through the door, glide down the stairs and phase through the front door- this time no problem. I'm out on the streets and I look up at the sky. The street light is out, making the sky all the more visible. And as I really start to gaze at the stars, this waxing sheen glosses over the clear sky and even more stars come into view. I have to choose one. I see a small cluster slightly up and to my left, I zero in on the one and I start levitating up towards it. I'm walking vertically towards the star until I remember that I used to swim up as a child. I start swimming up, never losing focus of the one star. After experiencing the swimming sensation briefly, I am now locked in on the star with a tunneling effect, I am suddenly on my back and being pulled up towards it. "Beam me up scotty" is what I think jokingly as the star is pulling me towards it. But, suddenly, I feel a prick on my left shoulder. It's like the plastic bottom of a ball point pen pushing into a tiny spot on my shoulder. When this happens I am descended back into my body, never making it to my destination...

I'm given a third attempt to push out of my body but with the descending feeling I realize I am kind of entering more of a dream state. I project once more but instead of attempting to leave my house I notice a red energy coming from my sisters bedroom. There's a fear associated here as I being to feel like someone else is with me, and her door closes on its own. I put my hand on the door and try to open it, but this angry energy is letting me know I'm not welcomed in this room. I'm not sure how necessary this part is, and there are probably beings rolling their eyes, but maybe it was my own fear that spurred this- instinctually I start saying the name Jesus Christ and commanding whatever is in my sisters room to *get out.* The door opens and I imagine I am splashing holy water in the corners of her room.

I'm pretty sure, from there, I wake up and realize I had an OBE but decide to go back to sleep because of how tired I am. *As a side note* a part of me thinks that red energy, anger, fear is all my a part of my self- and sadly, instead of facing it- i 'descended' into dogmatic behavior. I think I could have made a really cool discovery if I wasn't overcome with fear and anger. Although saying his name did put an end to the experience, I'm not sure that was the route I wanted to take... Next time... Next time *rubs temples*

Later I dream as a black man belonging to a group of car salesman. I am having an upgrade in vehicle and also reminiscing with the boys about this old lot we would sell cars at. I have an intimate relationship with a beautiful african american woman. It gets really strange as this guy is narrating about another man(maybe it is the man I am initially dreaming as, but I am no longer him) who "broke"(sexually) three women. They were all left "wanting" him. There was the african american woman, a white woman, and a trans-person(and sorry for the detail, I was beginning to feel gross as the narration was tied to showing each woman naked and stretched out the questionable trans person with a prolapsed organ). Last vision I have is witnessing another man, married, with a really tiny pecker asking another man to satisfy his wife the way the man who broke her did. She is at first performing oral sex on her husband, and then this volunteer. I feel like I received something with this woman before too but I feel a disgust towards it all(white trash is what I think) and I mentally back out before waking up. It was as I was pulling away from the scene that I realized these people were in a public space- a park and the woman on her knees in front of an audience.

[tides2dust]

5 days ago I woke up to six gentle knocks on my bedroom door at 3AM.
"Knock, knock, knock."
"Knock, knock, knock."

No one was there.

That night I dreamt about a member here, Nameless and a Guru I once visited was also present in the dreams.

Last night I woke up at 3AM again. I woke up to a frequency happening at the subtle level. It was like a really fast heart beat. My heart was naturally trying to sync with this, but I do not align with this frequency. I did not like it and did not want it. I think I may have been picking up the energy of the environment. It was a little brighter than normal outside, I thought it was 6AM, and I heard cars off in the distance racing. This faint drumming of a rapid heart beat carried on to 4AM. I could feel and hear it in the background to the immediate reality. I wonder who is doing this and am not appreciative.

I fell back asleep and had an OBE. This OBE did not take place in my room, but in either a psych ward or place of business... But it felt entirely like an OBE- the energetic sensations... all of it.
Here is the journal,

i remember seeing my astral self reflected off a monitor screen, and my physical self in bed. it was really cool because i've never seen both before. it was still a little difficult holding the energy and moving around. so instead of becoming obsessed with what i saw in the reflection i decided to push through the door. before pushing through i told my self... why am i walking? i'll just levitate... and suddenly i am hovering above the ground just a little... and with confidence i phase through the door. there's a gentle momentum pulling me like a current in a river. i let myself be pulled across halls of a hospital or office building. i look at the people in different rooms. one room has three girls working on computers and they're gossiping. i continue to float across and into another room with a lone woman dressed in business attire. she looks up as i am passing by like she might have felt my presence...

the last room i float through is more like a psych ward and there's a little girl with amazing blue eyes who sees me and waves. i wave back as i float by, and there's another man with pale skin and really blue eyes who also sees me and i wave to him as he stares at me with his mouth agape. he had really curly blonde hair.

i realize suddenly i can't hold on to this form much longer and collapse or phase out of the entire experience before descending into a dream

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Later today, after work, our total sales were 3333.66
An extremely rare occurrence.

I believe all of these events are somehow connected.

Even though the frequency was received as a negative experience... I think it may just have been the environment in that moment. I did initially think there was an outside force trying to induce mass anxiety on the populace. It may not be so sinister.

I also had a pleasant thought today...

I have this belief that God is in everything and everyone. I wish to address life as if God is standing before me. Even though at times it's just an idea... Somedays it feels like that idea is actualized, even if it is just a brief experience... It's the ultimate salve, the most amazing experience... I get so sidetracked with life... And I really need to shut my little self up sometimes to try and cultivate this belief into regular experience...

Cheers.