Sorrow Analyzed

[LightBeam]

Last night I had a dream that I was standing on a busy street with one of my high school classmate and her sister. The meaning of their first  names translated in English are Light and Star. My classmate Light said to me, lets go into the Library. I hesitated because I didnt think we needed to go there, but she persuaded me. We entered the building and to my surprise the room we entered was a church. There was a service going on and the priest was reading from the Bible. Her sister Star said, lets light a candle for the living and a candle for the dead. I lit my candle for the living and the flame was so big and bright. Then I attempted to light a candle for the dead and the flame kept going out. Then a strange lady said you need to pray, come with me. She took me to one of the altars and opened a large book. She said to me to start reading the scripture. But the pages had something completely scrambled words. I said I cant read this, it is not clear. She said, you cant see the words, look closely. I tried and tried but could not. Then I woke up.

The first message I saw from my sister was that one of my classmates and a good friend back then had passed away of stoke. Such a young woman to leave this world unexpectedly. She left a young child and a husband to go through life alone. I opened facebook and saw tributes from all of her family and friends. So heart breaking. This is the 7th person to leave so soon this life in the past year from my relatives, friends and acquaintances. I have never seen such a surge in exits of people in their 20s, 30s and 40s. Some of them from illness, some of them consciously chose to exit. The sense of loss is crushing. The sense of changes and loss of possibilities to catch up and experience again happy moments like before from the good old days with them. It's like a part of my own identity is also lost.

I felt like I needed to get put of my house and get in nature. I went to a natural park 5 minutes drive with forest and a running creek, a pond with ducks and small waterfalls. I walked along the creek, listening to the running water, looking at this life giving source. I asked the nature to wash away my sorrow and help me connect deeper with the other side at all time. As I was walking, staring at the water, the following thoughts popped in my head:
-They can see you, but you can't see them. That's why they don't grieve, but you do. For them you are not lost. But for you they have gone far away. Your feel sorrow because you know LOVE. That is your lesson. To understand love by setting up the illusion that you loose it.

Even I know where they go and what happens, I still grieve, I still feel nostalgia and pain. Because knowing something you can't see at the moment gets overridden by the immediate reality orientation where you perceive loss with all of your senses and you see it as you only reality at that time. But these thoughts sent me comfort and I instantly felt that she was walking right beside me with her arm around my shoulder. I even perceived the color of her shirt, bright red. I started talking to her. I told her that she is free now and can go wherever she wants and experience whatever her heart desire, just think with love and fearlessness. Then I felt like there were so many people walking beside me and behind me. I even turned around to look behind me, the feeling of the group walking with me was so strong. I smiled. I said, yeah, you can see me, I cant see you, but I can feel you. I know you are happy and have found the Light. My pain has lessened.

[Lumaza]

  Lightbeam, I feel your pain and emotions in your words! 

Even I know where they go and what happens, I still grieve, I still feel nostalgia and pain. Because knowing something you can't see at the moment gets overridden by the immediate reality orientation where you perceive loss with all of your senses and you see it as you only reality at that time. But these thoughts sent me comfort and I instantly felt that she was walking right beside me with her arm around my shoulder. I even perceived the color of her shirt, bright red. I started talking to her. I told her that she is free now and can go wherever she wants and experience whatever her heart desire, just think with love and fearlessness. Then I felt like there were so many people walking beside me and behind me. I even turned around to look behind me, the feeling of the group walking with me was so strong. I smiled. I said, yeah, you can see me, I cant see you, but I can feel you. I know you are happy and have found the Light. My pain has lessened.

That's what make us "Human" and separates us from many of the other "Races" in the Multi-verse. We talk about being "Observers". Being an "Observer" is much easier to do when you can put yourself outside of the direct influence of the circumstance at hand. When it directly impacts you, you can go into "Observer" mode after the fact, but at the time, you are consumed in emotion just like all the other Humans are around you.

 There are professions, like being in the Military, a Doctor, a Lawyer, etc. where you are supposed to "shelve" your emotions, so that your "training" can do what is necessary at the immediate moment in time to do. There are also organizations, normally cult based like Scientology and others, that teach/train you to do the same thing as well.
 

 

[Nameless]

The expression of strong emotions is one the exact reasons I feel we are here. So let them flow, acknowledge them. You have my condolences for your loss.

I always feel that those who have passed on ahead add to our own personal army of supporters. Lovely dream. The flame going out for the dead might be because there are no truly dead. Just a thought.

Hugs

[LightBeam]

Lovely dream. The flame going out for the dead might be because there are no truly dead. Just a thought.

wow, Nameless, this exact thought just came to me about an hour ago, and I questioned if my thought was correct. But now that you said exactly the same thing, I have no doubts
This morning and most of the day I thought the lack of flame was a bad thing, but when I have these two sisters in my dreams, which happens quite often (Light and Star), always something positive happens. Of course the passing of all these young friends and relatives we perceive as negative, but after all it is a part of the game. Light and Star have shown me though that there is no need to light candles for the dead, because no one ever dies, there are no dead things or people, there are just broken tools/vehicles. I think, we have to come up with a different term to describe one's transition which may lessen our grief and make us better understand the process and where the owners of these tools/vehicles go. That their freedom becomes much bigger than ours. That we are the ones that are trapped, not them. We should pity the living, not the dead. The perception of separation is just an illusion.

Lumaza, it is so true that while we are inside the storm, all our theoretical knowledge gets pushed aside and we react as human nature had intended. It is easier for the observers outside of the storm. That's why first hand experiences are necessary and all spirits experience it all first hand at some point of their existence. Now, when I observe other people's lives, I often say to myself, I completely understand this person, I have been there before, some experiences in this life and some experiences from another. No one is completely shield from challenges, but they will bring much bigger rewards on a grand scale by understanding pure love and happiness. I honor these challenges and recognize that every time I learn more and more, things that I didn't even know that there was more to learn. There is always room for more knowledge.