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,,It’s Not You, It’s Me"

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PinkStar

!Warning!:English is not my first language.

  Since I was a child I've started thinking this world is not my home, and I've wanted to leave it.
I read a lot of comments here about helping people and INTENTIONS, but the truth is, I don't really like people nor I hate them, but don't care about them. From childhood to these days I like to being alone and isolating from people. Everyday my brain asked ,,The Question": When we'll leave?
It's not depression, I think depression doesn't really exist, It's just you realize that you are powerless to live in peace without others harming you in any way.
  Getting to the point: If I exterminate my body I can go to the place when I feel at home and I'll be powerful enough to not being harmed?
I know, one of you wrote comments to suicidal people like: if they kill themselves they have to come back to learn the lesson, and their higher self is more intelligent than they. But what the bloody hell can I do If I'm just hate living here, happy pills can't help either?

Lumaza

#1
Quote from: PinkStar on November 05, 2016, 21:02:57
!Warning!:English is not my first language.

 Since I was a child I've started thinking this world is not my home, and I've wanted to leave it.
I read a lot of comments here about helping people and INTENTIONS, but the truth is, I don't really like people nor I hate them, but don't care about them. From childhood to these days I like to being alone and isolating from people. Everyday my brain asked ,,The Question": When we'll leave?
It's not depression, I think depression doesn't really exist, It's just you realize that you are powerless to live in peace without others harming you in any way.
 Getting to the point: If I exterminate my body I can go to the place when I feel at home and I'll be powerful enough to not being harmed?
I know, one of you wrote comments to suicidal people like: if they kill themselves they have to come back to learn the lesson, and their higher self is more intelligent than they. But what the bloody hell can I do If I'm just hate living here, happy pills can't help either?

I think many of us here have felt that way before, myself included. I always knew this wasn't my "home" and I when I was young I felt that I wanted to go back as well. But then "life" kicked in and showed me not only purpose as a whole, but my purpose here as well.

You and I and everyone here chose to incarnate and for some people "reincarnate" in this realm for a purpose. Maybe you help others by just "being". Maybe you are a "Record Keeper" and your duty here was to observe.  Perhaps you are here to heal yourself or others. You came for a "vacation" or to find love. There are a number of reasons you may have "chose" or been "chosen" to come here.

Learn to just observe everything around. You can still feel like a "outsider", but a outsider with a purpose. I enjoy "people watching". You can learn so much that way. Just as you can also learn about life by observing "nature" itself.  :-)

...and just know that there are many "others" out there in this realm and others that feel like you do. I know that because like I said, I am one of them. But we have always find a way to exist here. Find your purpose and learn to observe more. You will soon see that this realm really is an extraordinary place to be.

Talking to a Professional, Family and/or friends about your feelings will help as well.

...and lastly, turn off the news. That stuff can make anyone depressed!  :-P


"The day science begins to study non-physical phenomena, it will make more progress in one decade than in all the previous centuries of its existence."  Nicolai Tesla

PinkStar

Quote from: Lumaza on November 05, 2016, 21:35:13
I think many of us here have felt that way before, myself included. I always knew this wasn't my "home" and I when I was young I felt that I wanted to go back as well. But then "life" kicked in and showed me not only purpose as a whole, but my purpose here as well.


Thank you for your answer.
Can I ask you,how you find your purpose?

Lumaza

Quote from: PinkStar on November 06, 2016, 12:24:33
Thank you for your answer.
Can I ask you,how you find your purpose?
By observing not only what's outside of you, but also inside of you as well. Listen to your passions, your desires. What are your goals, your aspirations?
You don't need to answer this here. But you do need to answer that to yourself.
"The day science begins to study non-physical phenomena, it will make more progress in one decade than in all the previous centuries of its existence."  Nicolai Tesla

Xanth

Ultimately, YOU create your reality.  If all you focus on are the negative aspects of life, then yes, you're going to have a pretty crappy life.

Focus on the positives.  It doesn't mean that you ignore the negatives, there will ALWAYS be bad things which happen to you in your life, that's a just a matter of life each of us needs to accept, but you focus on the Love in your life instead of the Fear.

You'll be as surprised as I was at how much it changes your reality.

Nameless

I know that deep longing to escape this life and just go home. After a while though you start noticing things that just might be worth sticking around for. It's like taking that ultimate vacation only to wind up somewhere you didn't intend on being having lost all of your identity. You don't know who you are, you can't prove who you are and the last bus left yesterday.

After the moaning, groaning, crying, screaming and general panic you calm down and begin to look around. I don't think that desire to leave ever goes completely away but you do come to terms with being here and if you stick it out you will soon find there is purpose here. Expect the unexpected and concentrate on the beauty, the more you do this the more you will see.
Remember, You came here to this physical earth to experience it in its physical form. NPR will always be there.

PinkStar

#6
Quote from: Lumaza on November 06, 2016, 22:48:17
By observing not only what's outside of you, but also inside of you as well. Listen to your passions, your desires. What are your goals, your aspirations?
You don't need to answer this here. But you do need to answer that to yourself.

My passion was ,,magic". When I read the first Harry Potter book I get so obsessed, and became very disappointed when I didn't get the acceptance letter to Hogwarts at age 11.
And I always wanted to believe that I can create beautiful and crazy things from thin air. But you grow up and realize it's cannot possible and you are stuck in a world with full of barriers.
You have to work in order to survive, so you can work to survive.. Snake bites its tail. After work you can engage yourself in boring activities just to spend time.
Helping others(especially animals) is ok, but it's not my thing and doing material like hobbies are boring.
Sorry if I'm not an easy case, but I think your advices were really helpful but the picture is still not clear.

Xanth

PinkStar, your problem is your perspective.

Watch this SHORT video. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOM9LHZhLlA

It's my favourite Tom Campbell video of all time.  It's concise and to the point on what your problem is.

PinkStar

Quote from: Xanth on November 07, 2016, 12:03:23
PinkStar, your problem is your perspective.

Watch this SHORT video. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOM9LHZhLlA

It's my favourite Tom Campbell video of all time.  It's concise and to the point on what your problem is.

I appreciate your effort and watched the video.
I don't want to be vulgar but if you put a ribbon(positive thinking) on a pile of $hit it will be still a pile of $hit.
I guess Tom Campbell lives in the USA and he has a Master's degree from (Purdue) University. So he has every opportunity to get what he wants.
What if Campbell was born in Africa and he is so poor, so he can barely eat? Still he was the same guy with the same attitude?
Although I'm not starving and not poor, but something, that I told, still missing.

Xanth

Quote from: PinkStar on November 07, 2016, 12:50:01
I don't want to be vulgar but if you put a ribbon(positive thinking) on a pile of $hit it will be still a pile of $hit.
And that, in a nutshell, sums up nicely as to why you see your life as such.

Regardless of the circumstances you find yourself in, you can react to life in two ways, Love or Fear. 
I'm sure there are people in third world countries who are much happier than *you* are, even though they might not always have enough to food or a good shelter to sleep in each night.
Some people are just so full of Love that it doesn't matter the circumstances they find themselves in, they always see the good around them.

And in that, I guess, you'll find the only advice you need: find the good around you.

LightBeam

Thoughts become things.

Analyze the above and see what you need to change in your perspective about existence as a whole in the multiverse. It's not easy to do that, but the more you learn about the purpose of existing in controlled environments and other realities, the easier will become to dissolve beliefs that are holding you back from experiencing the wonders of each reality.
"The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem."
Captain Jack Sparrow