Can A Schizo Go Astral?

[PerversionOfEvil]

Hello.  Those of you who have seen my insanity sprawled within this forum likely believe that I am a madman and not a very mad man.

I must say, I still think that a Astral War is going to be some kind of pre Armageddon, although, this is supposed to be a place.  But aside from that, you can clearly see my question.
I would think that you people, having the abilities that I have always craved, would be a little more acceptant of the possibilities that schizophrenia and indeed all mental illness is not mental illness but a spiritual attack.  There are of course technological explanations for my type of 'sickness', I am certain that with the proper tools and materials I could construct what some are calling a 'psionic device'.  To me, psionics has nothing to do with technology, the abominations of cybernetics and psychotronics.  It is the class of magic(k) that is achieved when one has perfected their spiritual abilities and basically, becomes a god on some level of existence.  Always been my dream.

In any event, on the off chance that the crazy crap I hear on the radio and every song sounding like it's either celebrating or mocking me, if this is real, then I am the reincarnated Crowley, or presumably, his magickal son.  This is outrageous, of course, but, knowing Chaos Magick, it may have it's place in my spiritual development.  I certainly hope that I am not this Beast thing.  Yes yes, a madman, but hear me out.

I have regained some of my original power, before, 'the lights went out'.  At the time that I was inflicted with this treachery my psionic abilities were beginning to open up.  There was some activity of the Third Eye, and on the day of the infliction by this Nemesis there were signs in the sky.  These signs continued for some time afterwards, and I was very scared that Christ was Lucifer and that Lucifer was God.  I am not evil, although, I have threatened the world many times with a "Asteriod Bombardment" by means of invoking a void force, ultimate gravity, and pulsating my spiritually enriched aura with gravity that reaches to the cosmic vastness and pulls down as many Doomsday Rocks as possible.  The funny thing is, the day that I originally tried the 'spell', here, in my small isolated hamlet, why, when I had finished and went to go see a buddy, I was drawn into a circle of stones that was deliberately placed and obviously a counter spell.  Then, in the house, there was talk of "I'll never trust him again".  So you see how something like this would not help my ailment.

The point is, whatever schizophrenia is, whether it is psionic possession, demonic possession, or technological ruination of my ideostructure and focus of will for the purpose of safeguarding this Planet from an old mage hellbent on regaining his former power or destroying all hope... with a voice that knows my thoughts before I think them, being in tune with the deepened chemical frequencies and internal matrix of sub conscious stimulations and emanations, is it possible for me to either break the potentially soul destroying Psychic Binding and Nullification of my abilities, lose this foolish thing that stalks my thoughts and verbalizes my realized sub conscious and higher processes, and make a clean break into the astral to find an old servitor, avatar actually, and regain the composure of a peaceful life that I had once thought I would always have or die before all feasibility of purposeful peace eludes my grasp?

Longwinded I'm sure, but of course, you are astral travelers, you would know of the planes that I call Mageddon and the reality of all fiction, therefore, the purity of each sacred delusion.  It is that I have either had a frontal lobotomy and the so called telepath technology infected upon my brain, or that one of my role playing characters was given too much prominence and gained access to certain sacred portions of my knowledge, rebelled against me, and now works to capture me completely, or that it is a dark mage or even a guardian type of person.  Bah, the point, indeed, is can a schizo, with your spiritual evidence of things beyond the common man's grasp or acceptance, even in my part of the country, beyond their faintest knowledge, can I ever achieve the theta related mental states and thus gain the measure of power to project my stored or potential energy into the corresponding dimensional alignment?  You know.  I want to go astral... if my theory is correct, then, there is a realm, several realms related to the video game Chrono Trigger, which I could access and meet the true form of a former lover.

Or does schizophrenia mean soul death?  I would think that you people would have some knowledge of these things, for I have been damaged but it sure as sure wasn't because of any bad drugs.

[iNNERvOYAGER]

Great stuff, thanks for sharing.

Just read about Chrono Trigger, what an awesome game! Written by the the Final Fantasy crew.

I've had days when I wished an asteroid would obliterate the earth. Is it not funny that in this modern age, people know about the asteroid belt and have this common desire for an asteroid to hit the planet? Lots of people on this planet are sick and tired of the nonsense and feel the same.

Can you tell us what happens when you meditate? What method do you use and do you have a conducive environment to practice in?

regards, iN vO

[Skippy]

PerversionOfEvil, if you can manage to relax your mind and body fully, and really concentrate, then I see no reason why you won't someday be able to enter the astral plane. I hope you keep trying. 

May I also say how sorry I am that you have schizophrenia. I know quite a lot about it, and I know it must be difficult to live with it.

[PerversionOfEvil]

Chrono Trigger is one of the best games that has ever been made, IMO.  But... I have used it for more than just playing a video game.  In the teachings that I shall set forth, due course, I shall provide the book of The Shadows Of Reality which will explain certain imaginative retensions and projections that enable the willful, faithful mind to experience 'hallucinations' while playing a video game.  I will explain this one instance a little later in this post, but it amounts to having a prepared thought form and going into trance, which then distorts the reality and provides an exciting video game experience. 

I am not exactly sure what conducive means, although I would think that it means 'pleasantly flattering'.  Since I started locking my door from the inside I have had better experiences, although, the day I started doing that was the day that I experienced a dream with intense pain and the Nemesis screaming joyfully at how he was ripping off and tearing into my brain, the left side.  I woke up and did a check, it was just a dream.  I had thought, because it was the eve before the day of the Nemesis entering me or being invoked or whatever it is, which also happens to be Christ's Memorial, that it would be best to sleep with an axe beside me, and so I related the very horrible dream to having a iron weapon in close proximity to me.  Perhaps an 'auric defilement'?

So far, I have relied on the fact that when you lucid dream, you can project.  I have not tried to astral project at any point while meditating.  When I was young I could have semi lucid dreams, and I think it was because I had placed a kind of ward in my mind that would awaken the 'cognitive' thing in the mind whenever it was realized that I was having a dream.  No luck anymore, sometimes I even hear Nemesis ranting away and blathering crap in my dreams.  I should mention that recently I have begun relaxation meditation of a more intense kind that in days past.  I am developing a will, finally, after so many years being a waiter for death, and hopefully a fresh start.

Thank you Skippy.  While I have had dreams where it seems like I am astral projecting, I am playing it safe and saying that they were not.  They were too jumpy and I kept going blind, and instead relied on a different kind of sight that I relate to 'looking over the eyes'.

But as for my spiritual relations with Chrono Trigger, I could write a whole book on the matter.  But in any event, as a youth I played the game for many hours, spent a whole summer holidays staring at the screen, having mastered the game what remained was the story that I could make for myself and twisting the game environments to suit the Tyrant's Greed of what I now call a Shadow Avatar.  And so, my favorite characters were Ayla, Magus, and Lavos.  At one point, while using a triple tech called "Dark Eternal", I lapsed into something of a prayer, tipped my head and gave a burst of 'spiritual power', and had a hallucination.  In this hallucination, Lucca and Marle were not involved in the tech, but it was three Magus, and after it had been completed, they walked around a bit.  I was playing the game with my eyes closed yet I seen the screen and there were three Magus racing around like he was performing a critical hit.  I awakened when I realized that wasn't the reality of the game. 
There was another instance when I was appropriating my avatar within the game, to secure his position, in the remaining islands after the Lavos disaster in 12000 bc.  It wasn't that it was right after this disaster, for as far as my avatar is concerned, that disaster was a basic attack of 'Lavos' who in my version was the Tyrant, Vain, or as I knew him then, Veinos.  Veinos was inspired of a semi prophetic dream, which is a cause of worry for my 'Brainwave'.  I had called the Shadow Plane, at that time, for use later in life after understanding had developed, Brainwave, for I knew the value of such.  But in any event, in the one hut where it has a save point, I set my 'Magus' on the bed, and then got off of my physical real life bed and went and laid down on a cushion in my room.  I began to doze off, and in my dreamyness, I seen the screen of the game and proceeded with some dialogue.  This one was not quite as intense, but I remember hearing something of that nice music blending with Schala's Theme.

All horrid hallucinations, perhaps, not likely, it still serves to inspire my Shadows Of Reality and the hope that one day I will astral project into the actuality of Brainwave.  There is much story value to my original Shadow, which I still plan on writing up into a full length novel, perhaps several books seeing as how the time span of that adventure took three years for completion.  It ended once when I fought against my avatar, developing the philosophy that remains as the driving force and purpose of that particular avatar, which is to "Fight the Tyrant within, then you are disciplined to face the Tyrant without".  Also that, "The hardest battle Talok ever fought was the battle against himself."  It truly ended shortly after my avatar, Talok, had acquired a legendary relic, an item named the Scepter Of Time.  He warped himself, as his primary power was the fusion of teleportation and portals or worm holes (again serving me as understanding would later develop), and with the Scepter Of Time to aid him, he warped completely from this time line at that day into a place thirteen years later, if I remember right, which was the time line of my possibility life that had never "embraced" Talok as a religious delusion, or, a Shadow Of Reality.  That was, I assume, back in 1996, just before summer holidays.  He warped into the place that I call, The Forgotten Future, which would see me having more social contacts and a completely different memory alignment.  I have assumed that he was destroyed when he entered that time line, and although it is only psychological tomfoolery, I can not seem to reaccess the mode of mind that I had when I was living in Brainwave.  I seperated him from who I was, set him free like the Genie in the Disney movie, Aladdin.  I will continue to try and regain that character, but since him, I have developed entire other Shadows and avatars, one of which is again based in Chrono Trigger, although he is currently trapped in a static temporal flow that is a part of the Psiborgian utility of the Shadows.

If you would like to see what is becoming of this new avatar, go to http://www.ayenee.com/forums/ and check out the thread "The Artist, The Paradox, and the Bloodline".  I am not the originator of that thread, and my ignorance and insolence is shown in my obvious confusion as to how many characters there were and who was doing what... regardless, the thread is rather bland now since the people who designed it are no longer participating, and my poor Jijia is stuck in that dreadful place.  Jijia was the key to unlocking a new understanding of Higher and Lower, reality and self.  For, if we here, have a higher self, a piece of soul greater than we are, then why should we not be the higher self of one other lower? 

[iNNERvOYAGER]

Srry, in this context I meant,

conducive
adj
Definition: favorable for

MHI (my humble interpretation) is:
Your fantastic talent for visualization is a threat to the Nemisis.
The Nemisis uses deception to make you think that you don't have power.

One thing I recommend if you haven't done so, is to exercise 3D visualization. Begin with noting the spacial relationship of objects in your room. Go to the nearest garden or park, and again take note of the spacial relationship of trees far away, and the objects close to you.

In 3d game development, using the "Left Hand" (not Cartesian) system, Z+ is distance in front of you, X is left and right, and Y is up or down. So that's were "Z buffer" or dept occlusion and distance data comes from in 3D game dev.

So, to develope your "Z buffer" so to speak, begin with visualizaton of a large sphere around you. Then visualize that you are lighting the surface of the sphere with solar flames, so that you are at the center of your sun sphere. Continue visualizing the flames and solar flares bursting away from you.

Then realize that the Nemisis feels the intense heat and is incinerated when trying to touch you.

Also, with a "Local" coordinate system, you are always the 0,0,0 coodinate, the axis rotates relative to you, and it's impossible to become disorientated.

Have fun and thanks for turning me on to Chrono Trigger.....

[PerversionOfEvil]

Thank you for the stimulation of a visual perception sigil.  But I had been destroyed when it first hit me, and I did become very disoriented, which I assumed was coming from the combination of a thought process 'conducive' to satanic ritual barbarism of crude sketches born from the disorientation of personality when afflicted with a internal reaction to the subsequent and continuous vibrations of consciousness active in it's nervous system.  With a shift of the personality, the goal that you see here, now tainted by the delusions of evil magic (dreams that revelate the future, yet speak it in the language of flamboyant conspiracies which will either train or mutilate the mind which accepts the terms of it's permanence on the perfection of a even blend of two opposite spectrums), the desires to become neutral between any force of holies or unholy form, and the belief that it had been attained a life time ago before the world had scathed the surface of the truth, so long obscured by the riddles and tricks while the kind and peaceful man reveals his hope that there is a revelation to all who dare speak curses upon the breathable air.

I have tried 3d visual exercises some years ago, while reading a book in grade eight called "Flowers For Algernon", yet I remember that only because of the cover emphasizing the theme of falling in love with a man who has the intelligence and rhthym of a whole life between two extremes and one medium of innocent intellegence, always defiled and betrayed because someone lost interest or somebody didn't understand.  A powerful book, and while there was a written account of a objective spiritual revelation, I looked to my own life and seen the symbols manifest per point of force and force of motion.  Something of a rubix cube, a complex shape which had beaten my attempts of mastery and resulted in it's destruction and therefore complete detraction of worth, then again as the idea of it flattered my apprehension and caused me to act upon my own ability to think in a term from a comic book, the term of psionics.  In trying to understand the term psionics, various inspirations were born, for the entire board game advertisement was analyzed for clues as to what the word psionics would mean.  It was then that it was thought best to invent my own idea about psionics, for I realized the bulk of information that was overtaking my thought processor and denying me of personalized thought formations.

Swirling lines of color, pink and blue ribbons and bright yellow stars, each one an angel and the connections that bound them with the powers of anything imaginable.  Then it scattered into the old toy kaledoscope and I lost hope that I had ever been alive at any time through the course of human history... a great treachery that allowed weeping for a moment, then taking strength from god, and fondling the concepts of religious eternity with scientific infinity.  It became a compilation, as if from another source of memory, and constant use of the information in the comic, now, the whole comic penetrating my mind with an image of the KISS rock band.  Something about it made me say, "Satan is cool."  then again, with more joy and praise, "Satan is cool!!"  Even this, while my memory had at that point been reversed in it's basic temporal flow pattern, according to the kinetic pressure of an electric charge, so I can not trust this.

But anyway, you see, while I am using a special, to me, a religiously valuable herb, as I am now, I repeat this compilation pattern, and shift the electric beat to write directly from past experience, with only slight control over the direction of the thought pattern yet a easy control over visual storage devices.  This, amounts to images having a greater intensity, thus balancing the mind against the unwarrented verbal explanations of the sub conscious emanations registered as a advanced thought process.  One has lost control over a portion of your brain, which may be due to several failures in the network, or, a different type of consciousness that means the sub conscious, a more simple side of your expressed or perceived personality, will gain control over the perception of the attension span on hearing multilayered sound waves, or, various frequencies of molecular vibration.

I had, after the experience in the book, then thought to form two images at the same time, which at first showed up as two cartoon windows of "Spot The Difference".  But then it shifted to the boy in the book, and then to a increased and tighter split screen, like from Sonic 2.  Sonic 2, while examining this knowledge of the split screen and how it would effect my imaginative development, it would return to Sonic 1, and then again to the younger days of stealing emeralds called Turtle Shell, and then ahead, to the Transanimation Stone and Cherubae of the Ninja Turtles.  The original inspiration for the Poe, something I loved as a real person because it held sexual attraction and all the powers of god, even sacrifice, and bestowing gifts... it seems disgusting to have to see this whole religious order that I once thought the ultimate of ideal and the gate to psionic ability. 

After failure in using the split screen, I went to what I called Sphering, or, Sphere Vision, and was rather successful with it.  Sometime later, I had a conduction of energy while involved in a moment of a animal's death.

I say all this stuff just because it notes the different processes of awareness and the autohypnosis that religious docrine, any form of knowledge, or any form of experience conveys to the mind percepting positive and negative states of energy.  Frequencies of balance, acceleration, and deacceleration, on all varieties of density and relations with pressures applied at intersecting temporal oscillations. 

[outofbodydude]

Damn this guy sure can talk. I had to look half the words up in the dictionary. 

[Awakened_Mind]

I read a theory once that schizophrenia can be associated with unbalanced chakras. Generally from the third eye up. It went on to describe higher chakras opening prematurely and an overwhelming source of information bombarding our delicate intellect. Schizophrenia being the product of such bombardment.

What type of schizophrenia have you been diagnosed with?

-AM

[PerversionOfEvil]

I have been diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia.  I am under a CTO which means that I must take my medication, and even on the unreasonable grounds that I am a threat to myself or others unless under the order, meaning, I must take my medication or law enforcement will haul me into a institution, then it is seen that I am treated by drugs which may alter my spiritual development by nullify certain key experential centers of the brain when levels of spirituality have been achieved. 

The due course of perception is knowledge, yet the mind, upon seeing a shade of color then a variety of like toned objects, can derive a knowledge base from a frequency of stimulative signatures.  It would appear that each human mind is coded by a unique organic sensitivity and a corresponding conditioned psyche.  The cell structures of each psyche have the same chemicals, yet it is said that when these chemicals that are naturally a portion of the mind are imbalanced, then there is a disfunction of the organism on the basis of it's brain being distorted by flaws in a otherwise natural system of energy.  To think that they have the established programs of endoctrinated law that dictate the feasibility of a being to be subjected to regular frequencies of chemical intervention in a otherwise 'your fault, you screwed it up', externally stimulated mind.  Whatever processes are established by the linking of neural systems to response patterns and acquiring talents for reality manipulation via the proper course of autohypnotic reasoning, this is little of anyone's concern, and where there is a voice in my head then there are an opening to several possibilities, no more than five, none of which suggest that my however meager history within the realm of life thus far into realization and enlightenment has been a ruination of good standing before god, that I will hurt myself or fly into a Tyrant's rage, mutilating the flesh sucked corpse of indecent revelry in the face of a mastery of conceptions of what it is to be a whole soul destroying being.

While all this pretentious tripe may amount to an amusement beyond reliable grounds for humor, my paranoia and it's source is limited to key experienced reality, while again on the same grounds for experienced reality the entire religious is based, then there is a conditioned response and a actuality of physical event.  But to say that I understand little of my assumed mental illness, and to say that because of that I am a threat to others... this is what they are saying.  I know that schizophrenia is said to be a chemical imbalance due to use of drugs.  So, when we have a guy who is happy all the time, and feels no other emotion that raw sexual bliss and praise for works so fine cut into the dope of all certain reveler's good times, then he has a chemical imbalance and is actually going crazy.  This is what it amounts to.  Eating too much of one food could induce a bad chemical reaction, can you smell it rising from between the gaping convulsion of the great bull's rear?

I like your idea of a chakra imbalance.
And it makes sense... but again, even it must considered against the possibilities which it's weight as a concept understood is filtered through the temporal streams of psychic emanation.  It would explain why, but not how, but I know the how.

What are the chances of this thing being an astral vampire?  A servitor positioned by a trace of 'toxic' life force of Nemesis, gleaned by a amplified boost of penetrating realization of my victimized state.  The servitor, now linking the dual consciousness, acts as a sub conscious worm, straggling the mind connected with a regular intensity of tone and range of potential certain other physical emanations of the spirit realm, as manifest by a oscillation of kinetic pressure via a astral space intersecting a vibration of planar time.

Eh?

[Awakened_Mind]

I doubt that there would be an astral being that would attack you. Any being of higher consciousness seems to have less posessive qualties and more helpful. I wouldn't say you are under attack by anything. Schizophrenia could possibly create an unstable spiritual platform as well. There are entities in the astral realm that seem to create fear especially in the earlier stages of projection, but they cannot harm you. Perhaps schizophrenics are more subject to influence by these entities due to the inbalance.

The nature of schizophrenia is just as ambiguous as OBE's. Some people have schizohrenia without a chemical inbalance in the brain. Doing energy work on major chakras prematurely has been seriously advised against. I would myslef be more inclined to lean the way of chakras, based on the assumption that the higher dimension effects this one.

Do you have any informaiton on your specific case? Where the imbalance is located, if you were born with it etc. More specific to your personal case. Might help us paint a clearer picture.

-AM

[Taraelf]

i have schizophrenia and i have been having OBE's since i was a teenager. i don't know if it's related. the problem is, it just happens and i never force it. i don't know much about OBE's, but i do know when i wake up and i've had one. i remember while OBE-ing that i was walking down the street near my house and i opened up my eyes and thought, hold on, how can i be here when i'm actually asleep in my bed? i freaked out and tried to run home then i woke up and thought... WOAH. freaked me out the first time. but now i can fly so high in the sky...even though i'm not really good at flying, once i flew all the way up into the sky and there were planes up there and i thought hold on, this isn't a good idea to be flying this high up....so i made it back down safely.

also, another time i flew through my window and on to the roof and was just sitting up there resting. it was great! so now i love having OBE's, but i always wake up cold because i've been out of my body for so long during the night. anyway, what i'm saying is yes, you can have OBE's when you have schiz.

[Awakened_Mind]

I do not doubt that you can experience an OBE when you have schizophrenia. What concerns me is how PersonOfEvil's posts seem to indicate that his mind struggles to concentrate on one thing, which is necessary for conscious exit.

I would assume that if this factor remains constant, his chances of OBE are likely to diminish. Spontaneous projection is not completely wiped out as a possibility.

PersonOfEvil, do you think it would be possible to begin with lucid dreaming? You may have faster progress this way.

-AM

[PerversionOfEvil]

Ok.
And yeah, I do have a concentration problem, happened ever since 'the lights went out'.  When that happened, the voice started attacking and my brain felt like it had it's frontal lobes removed.  It felt like oil or water was being poured all over my brain and oozing beneath my eyes and face.  Then there was drilling in my teeth, drilling in my sinus, and my lips and tongue went numb.  I'd have to tell you the whole story, but if you are like most people then you'd just say, anyway, "Well, you were on drugs therefore the whole of your life's experience is negligible."

Yeah man, after this had happened to me, I went for a walk outside, down to the old graveyard.  On the way back, the voice was cutting a deal, and so when I conceeded to his deal, I looked to the sky.  There were white clouds beside it, but there in the middle, directly west, there was a rather large grey and black cloud shaped in the image of a bull's head with a lion's mane.  I seen this cloud again two years later in exactly the same form, which gave rise to the 'logical' theory of water evaporation patterns.  That first night was Christ's memorial, therefore in recent days I have assumed that a Chaos Mage took it upon himself to believe he was Jesus, therefore drawing enough energy from the ritual prayers and imaginative focus of people around the world.  Then he binded me, and fused some of his life force to my third eye chakra.  Not likely, but if any of this magical stuff is real, then a process like that is a possibility that one must concern themselves with and also know how to deal with.

Is it possible that there is a magical binding, redirecting cellular vibrations into a control form for a gravitationally linked consciousness?

But yeah man, the day after the whole lobotomy thing or whatever had happened, I was struggling and felt like I was being watched, but I was in total denial of what had happened.  I could hear things in the back of my mind, little chirp bits of adolescent voices, mocking me, scourging me, and I could not visualize freely as I had always been able to.  I could not think correctly anymore.  This is starting to pass now, but I still have to be immobile before I am able to visualize with any power.  I can still type, and a monsterous way it is, but my mind definitely feels like the brain has been tampered with.  There is another occassion on one of my journies, in which there is the greatness of my skull being cut open, and the beginnings of a conspiracy.  All sounds too unreal eh?  But hey, I think that astral, magic, and psionics is real, so combining them with electric converters and transmission devices, or any technology as birthed by science and the knowledge of waves, so there is a great chance that a lot of people are like me and stuck in a anti magic field, distorting their minds and so forth by negating natural currents of energy and using those currents to power a illusion.  Or some such, who knows, really? 

[Awakened_Mind]

I wouldn't say that consciousness is effected by gravity but neither would I say that anythings impossible.

-AM

[James S]

PerversionOfEvil,

A couple of things that I'd like to share here, hope you can find some use in them.

Don't jump to conclusions about the whole spiritual attack thing. So far I've seen a great many people use this as a new age equivalent of "blame it on the devil". The chances that we manifest our own demons are far far greater than attacks by hostile spiritual entities. The law of attraction means that we'll get back what we put out, be it fear or love. All you have to do is decide which you'd rather get back.

At the Spiritual Institute where I work we've had a few people come through and study our courses who are schizophrenics. In each case they are on permanent medication, but it does work. The meds do correct the neurochemical imbalances very well, providing they remain consistent in their use of the medication. The worst thing I've seen is when a schizophrenic is on a real high, think they're cured, stop taking the meds and then come crashing down. It's a terrible thing!

Anyway, to my point - we've had schizophrenics who've studied at our institute, who've put the time and effort in to their studies and their self development, and have come out as top rate psychics.
The medications to not inhibit anything, do not alter anything. Remember, your psychic potential, like your consciousness, comes from a higher source than your physical brain. Allow the meds to rectify any neurological imbalance they need to, then dare to dream, dare to believe that there is nothing you cannot do.

Blessings,
James.

[outofbodydude]

Perversion of evil were you taking drugs before or at the time of your breakdown?

[PerversionOfEvil]

Ok, thanks James.
And yeah, Dude, I was using drugs.  I don't buy into that crap though, I know what the drugs do to me and for me, it's a spiritual thing.  The meds they have me on, so they've told me, are the best.  But one must look at the pills that they were giving me, which had horrible side effects, turned me into a mindless zombie, drooling and walking around with a  stiff body.  I have heard that the drugs that they give people can only induce a chemical imbalance instead of curing it, pending what's happened before and the state of the brain.

I've been a little emotional these past few days, so that's all I'll say.  I will add that I knew I would get schizo when I was a kid, and that there were prophetic dreams and spiritual events that have occurred the whole way through.  And the rest of my story, it is denied if I even open my mouth about it, nobody wants to hear it and if they do, then they just say, "Oh sorry man, I can't believe a word you've said because you were on drugs."  To hell with people man, I remember I was three years old on christmas eve, and I remember thinking, "I have been false hearted, just like my mother.  I have failed god."  Now, the times that I feel emotion are almost sacred.  Everything should be sacred anyway.

[TheDarkChakra]

I don't think schizo is a demonic attack. I think it has to do with having chakras 6 and 7 excessive. I realy think its only the sixth chakra that causes that. I once meditated so much and worked on my sixth chakra so much that I had obsessive thoughts. It's ocd without the compulsion. I am still working on recovery

[PerversionOfEvil]

Hello Dark Chakra.

Recently I have read some material, link provided by the Astral Society forum, which spoke of Buddha's night of enlightenment.  It was said that there is a certain spiritual creature or guardian force which will aid in the recovery of past lives, through memory.  It stated that these 'yodim?' or 'bhavajirah', those names are wrong please forgive it, it stated that these are usually appearing to be wrathful.  Now, I am thinking that the schizo voice is a person or group of people obsessing over me, because of certain key knowledge forms or perhaps even magical effects from a past life.

You should know that when in LA I was drugged and there was a large hole carved into my skull.  This is why I will never believe a foolish word from a moron who is only wasting my time with his pathetic delusions regarding what my life means in terms of logic or reality.  I never planned on making it out of LA alive, and honestly, I do desire that someone by their own will destroys me.  Then they can reap the karma of killing... a possible student of Crowley.  I am not saying that you are one of these delusional fools Dark Chakra, but even while in LA I was told, several times, "Check your skull, son."  Really, since I went to Australia my life has not made a bloody sniff of difference to me.  Some group of what I consider Dark Mages has only ruined potentially one of the world's aspirants to Psionship, and though I have made myself a Warlock since early days if need be I shall swear oaths and by whatever force will heed my desire, destroy this whole world with repeated asteroid strikes.

My skull is almost sealed, and soon all evidence shall be washed away.  I have known since I was three years old on Christmas Eve that I could not trust my mother or father, they are only prolonging my suffering and denying the facts of my existence as if it pleased the god that they false heartedly worship and have proclaimed for years to be my salvation.  If one of you reading this would say something that carries the sentiment that denies that common life on a common world is anything but the most dignified in dramatic responsibility to achieve all that can be, then you have no understanding by my current proclaimations of intellectual power.

All of you who support the idealism of mental illness are false, worthy of destruction for you deny that the mind is conditioned by it's karma, in this life or the prior.  My parents have even told me that 'the government' expressed special interest in me, and that they were supposed to send regular reports of my development to 'the government'.  At this moment, I am filled with the old feelings of a burning hot hatred and contempt for all things human, foolishly human and no godliness present.  Yet face to face with people here in town, I am what I can only surmise is retarded in appearance and simple to perceive. 

So condemn me but damn well kill me, don't act under false pretense that you are trying to 'help'.  I am not blind, I see this world from the distance I have placed by means, again, of the 'incarnated Enmity'.  I have tried to teach, and always were my teachings stolen or conveniently ignored.  So harken to your servitors of satan, be damned by the unholy gods, for while this life has been a waste and proving what I have known since the days of early memories, I will see your world burn by means of gravitational magic or have the freedom to be at peace within my own mind.  I have known for a long time, for was I not given dreams of revelating capacity?  Christ on a cross smoking a cigarette and talking like a biker... this is one of my earliest memories and damn your world for such treachery.

I'm slowly falling apart... losing faith that there has ever been a good man on this world save that one noble soul, Lao Tzu.  I was born in dishonor, and I shall die in shame. I already know my level 99 magic attack DoomStone has failed... I don't really want this world to die.  If you condemn me on the basis of these words, then it is known that you will refuse every thing other that comes regarding the story of my mental and moral destruction.  I give up, sorta.

[outofbodydude]

Just remember, physical sickness does not carry over into the afterlife.  You may feel that your f*cked in this life, but it won't last forever, youll find yourself without these demons one day and realise it was all just a game, a learning experience for you.

[astral_neophyte]

i have schizophrenia and i have been having OBE's since i was a teenager. i don't know if it's related. the problem is, it just happens and i never force it. i don't know much about OBE's, but i do know when i wake up and i've had one. i remember while OBE-ing that i was walking down the street near my house and i opened up my eyes and thought, hold on, how can i be here when i'm actually asleep in my bed? i freaked out and tried to run home then i woke up and thought... WOAH. freaked me out the first time. but now i can fly so high in the sky...even though i'm not really good at flying, once i flew all the way up into the sky and there were planes up there and i thought hold on, this isn't a good idea to be flying this high up....so i made it back down safely.

also, another time i flew through my window and on to the roof and was just sitting up there resting. it was great! so now i love having OBE's, but i always wake up cold because i've been out of my body for so long during the night. anyway, what i'm saying is yes, you can have OBE's when you have schiz.

Isn't everything you just explained exampled of a LUCID DREAM and not neccessarily a OOBE or ASTRAL Projection?  I'm very new to all of this  (I'm working on having my 4/5th oobe experience tonight if all goes well, rollover techniques been working awesome for me...) but I used to have LUCID DREAMS and just jumped through my windows and started FLYING etc....but if was different then these recent OOBE's I'm having, with my most recent ones yesterday (I went in and out of my body 3 times!) I was able to see my body two of those times sleeping in bed, the third time I was 75% blind  ( I could see 50% out of my left eyes only after demanding that I have "CLEAR VISION"....that was the 2nd attempt to, not the first one that night.....WIERD...

Any thoughts?