Very disturbed...

[AstralCody]

What the he**?  

I had a dream this morning that felt so real I didn't know whether or not to put it in the OBE section or the dream section. I had no control over my movement etc and it felt like a dream. It concerns me though because it was so vivid could it have been a low awareness projection?

Before this dream the night before I had a dream I shot an old schoolmate in the chest. He used to bully me way back in the day. I called him... said I have a prize for him and to open his front door. He did just that. I shot him dead in the chest with a revolver. I went to my old house (Which I often find myself at in dreams and OBE's) to hide out. MY dad ended up going nuts in that dream too. I woke up mortified. I thought why? Why am I having these dreams? I don't hate anybody... I am done living in the past. I was frustrated.

So last night I had the dream I want to talk about. It was the most vivid dream I have ever had. My grandpa died back in 09. There he was... This seemed to take place at my old house I don't remember. It was a get together with family of some sort. He looked sad. But real as can be... Just like the very last time I saw him before he passed away. He would not make eye contact with me and he seemed extremely ticked off at me the most. Yet I was so happy to see him. This hurt.

So someone asks to him... How is it on the other side? He said "eh...I wish I had more help..." I had so many questions for him. Someone brought up that I play video games. (I do.) In particular grand theft auto lol. He got extremely mad and looked at me and cursed quite a bit at me for playing that... (Video games help my anxiety tremendously) It gets my mind off stress etc.

AT another point in the dream someone asked him what happens after you die... He said you learn.. you grow.. and then you start ALL over. This sucks because that's not what I want to happen.

Anyway... I catch him alone and Before I ask what I wanted to ask he looked at me and said... "You need to stop acting like a different person with your anxiety... You need to be you." and I woke up feeling hurt. I felt pure hate toward me in that dream. Like I was hated. I cannot explain it but it still hurts. What I do not understand is I have seen my grandpa before in a out of body experience. I was in my basement smiling floating around... I then see him at my bar all of a sudden. He smiles at me and gives me a big wink. I wanted to talk to him but I was sucked back in my body.

I also got a reading done long time back. (This lady was spot on with me all the time) It was absolutely amazing. I asked if she could tell him I was thinking of him and how he was doing. She did her thing and said he was doing very good and he was in a very HIGH place. With angelic like beings. she said he gave a hug motion to all of us and that he is fine. She also mentioned he said something about the three stooges. It's funny because him and my uncle (His son) Watched that ALL the time when my uncle was little. Annnnnnd that's it.

Why all of this hate in the dream? I am very disturbed by this. It felt like my grandpa hated me and it just hurts.

[Lionheart]

Before this dream the night before I had a dream I shot an old schoolmate in the chest. He used to bully me way back in the day. I called him... said I have a prize for him and to open his front door. He did just that. I shot him dead in the chest with a revolver. I went to my old house (Which I often find myself at in dreams and OBE's) to hide out. MY dad ended up going nuts in that dream too. I woke up mortified. I thought why? Why am I having these dreams? I don't hate anybody... I am done living in the past. I was frustrated.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fbeqlNt398
Anyway... I catch him alone and Before I ask what I wanted to ask he looked at me and said... "You need to stop acting like a different person with your anxiety... You need to be you." and I woke up feeling hurt. I felt pure hate toward me in that dream. Like I was hated. I cannot explain it but it still hurts. What I do not understand is I have seen my grandpa before in a out of body experience. I was in my basement smiling floating around... I then see him at my bar all of a sudden. He smiles at me and gives me a big wink. I wanted to talk to him but I was sucked back in my body.

Hey Cody. I had the Dream of my childhood bully many times. In one night I relived it over and over again, due to re-scripting, because I wasn't seeing the real purpose. In the end, the real purpose was Forgiveness. I had to turn to him just as he was going to hit me and say that whatever he does I forgive him and release him from my reality. Once I did that he disappeared and I awoke for the day. But, it took me reliving that scenario for the entire night. I kept fighting him back, like obliterating him and things. Oh, wrong answer, reboot and do over, lol.

The next could be that you are being shown that you and you alone can beat your anxiety. That your Grandpa is trying to show you that you are the one that holds the key. You just need to see that and BELIEVE it.

It wasn't hate, it was "Tough Love". 

[Bedeekin]

I agree with Lionheart about maybe you being shown something that actually contains vital information that will help you grow.

In truth I have been through an extreme anxiety disorder when I was about 17 to maybe 25. I know what anxiety is. I didn't go out for nearly 5 years. I did get over it. It has left me... gone. Also a lot of problems DO NOT get to me. What I found anxiousness towards I now confront to the point of dismissal. I can't tell you how I fully got over it. I can't impart any words of wisdom to you that would give you a clue. Why? because A) I really don't know fully myself and B) You are telling yourself this.

Your grandpa is one powerful tool used to confront you.. mine came in the form of ME... I don't know whether that could be counted as narcissistic on my part but it did... for a start... I don't have nor have never had a granpa figure who means so much to me.

I think that maybe you are super hurt because you received ultimate truths. We use excuses to cover our fears all the time. It's part of our ego.. our safety net.

[Chaki]

Maybe he's right - you do need to be you. In order to overcome your anxiety, instead of trying to be "that guy" who is socially confident and relaxed, you need to accept who you are as a person, be that person unapologetically, and own it.

Maybe the "pure hate" you described is not necessarily truly hate on his end, but the emotion he knew you needed to take action. If he had shown you pure love while saying it, it wouldn't have had as severe of an impact on you, so he knew he had to affect you in this way.

Just some of my thoughts

[Volgerle]

Someone brought up that I play video games. (I do.) In particular grand theft auto lol. He got extremely mad and looked at me and cursed quite a bit at me for playing that... (Video games help my anxiety tremendously) It gets my mind off stress etc.

maybe it is to be taken quite literally, maybe he wanted you to look for other ways to get your mind off stress (meditate more, talk a walk, sports, playing music etc...)? just an idea.

[roman67]

maybe it is to be taken quite literally, maybe he wanted you to look for other ways to get your mind off stress (meditate more, talk a walk, sports, playing music etc...)? just an idea.

I also agree with you Volgerle.

[Contenteo]

Most experiences in which you know the entities and places in the scenario take place on the lower level of the 'astral'.

IMO, its more like you are still focused in on your own brain.

I wouldn't worry too much on this one, I'd pick up the Freud and and put down the Monroe for this one. And even then, don't think too much into it go read a book on NLP or Heuristics. 

Cheers,
Contenteo