my dairy about my experiences with spirit possession

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masochist monk

hi i use to have an account here don't know why I can't log in but I feel the need to share my experiences .. it might be helpful for others who might be going through the same thing

its long but the story is truly an amazing one ..

http://www.dreammoods.com/cgibin/cutecast/cutecast.pl?session=QbaLHXFVgHuxPFJTIFXIAvqHle&forum=9&thread=34840

Nay

Hi there M..Monk, what was your user name before? Perhaps I can help if you want your old user name, or better yet PM Adrian.

I clicked on your link, but it was taking forever to show up..and I have cable!  go figure..:P

masochist monk

hi nay

my sn was either eyesofvengeance or eyesofvengeance5

I don't remember

well the reason it loaded so slowly is that there's a lot of text

hehe

:oops:

Tyciol

Wow, talk about milking a good story! I love the way you steered clear of the bull, usually claims like this are very cheesy, udder nonsense. I spotted the tail's ending, although my perceptions of it were rather frayed. Now I think I'm going to curdle up with a book and watch some anime.

James S

Dear MM,

I believe this to be a more relevant forum for your topic. While it entails a component of communication, it is more predominantly an issue of the need for psychic defence.

Kind regards,
James.

masochist monk

Quote from: TyciolWow, talk about milking a good story! I love the way you steered clear of the bull, usually claims like this are very cheesy, udder nonsense. I spotted the tail's ending, although my perceptions of it were rather frayed. Now I think I'm going to curdle up with a book and watch some anime.

you read all of it? I thought maybe it was to long, and I was afraid of people being judgmental of me but you know its more then a story, its my life

hehe anime fan too huh?

also not sure if this should be part of psychic self defense because the truth of the matter is I gave up on "light" meditations, visuals and etc. it was just not working me

Tyciol

Nope, I was just being a jerk. However now that I know you're a fan of anime, combined with your badass name I have decided to read it and reply soon!

masochist monk

Quote from: TyciolNope, I was just being a jerk. However now that I know you're a fan of anime, combined with your badass name I have decided to read it and reply soon!

*blinks*

Anonymous

Ignore the jerks.  There are a few here, who lack your experiences, who lack your ability to speak the truth, as difficult as that can be.  Their idea of the astral world is based on a very limited perspective, culled from books and their imaginations.  

I read through your experience--all of it.  You are not alone in having these experiences although the number of people having them to this depth of infringement is rather rare, thus the lack of empathy and intellgent responses to your ordeal.  

I find it again interesting, that although the male you were communicating with as a result of having this imposter(s) thrust on you, also experienced some unusual pheonomena, it was not to the extent that you did.  Females seems to be paticularly vulnerable to these sexual manipulations, not that men never are, just that this is more common with females.  

If I remember correctly, you thought at first that this guy was to blame for the invasion/infringment in the most intimate sense.  Then you decided it was entities fooling you both.  Then you weren't sure.

You won't figure it out by thinking about it, and you know why.  Let him go as much as you can, whether he is in part to blame is beside the point.

Also, a word about emotion, anger in particular.  I have found anger--expecially extreme rage-- to be a very potent defense and I would not hold it back , think it wrong, or try to deny that part of you.   You have every right to be mad as hell, so it express it--not to the people around you, but to them.

I cannot relate to the guilt because I did not have a religious upbringing as you have that gave me the imprint that sex was dirty.  So my response in realizing I was fooled was rage so powerful, it brought a Mixed Being to the physical (very rare).  Mixed being is what most would call God.  They are not, they are on the God cirucit however.  They are simply beings that hold both the dark and the light, and their eyes are very powerful.  They look like the sun, until you see the shadow, and you feel a little fear becuase you know they are not "all light" but contain both.  

I am telling you this because I think the guilt is what is keeping the sexual stimulation from continuing.  My rage stopped it--I did not have that guilt.  I know you felt anger too, but you keep trying to deny that, as if that is "not of the light" or means you are somehow not as evolved as a spiritual being.  Let me tell you--the most evolved beings in the universe are integrated, both the dark and the light.  So express it without fear or resevation, but then let it go.  

Good luck.

Anonymous

I want to add that the issue of females being more vulnerable might have an easy explanation.  We females tend to sublimate our sexual desires, to resort to fantasy much more than males, who find it easier to admit to sexual feelings.  Also,  the fact that we put all this energy into fantasy, the mental and emotional planes, means we might draw predators of this sort of energy more easily.  

But there is also the real world physical truth, that females, since they do tend to repress their sexuality, tend to experience a more intense emotional response to sexual feelings when they meet/encounter someone who we feel "safe" to express these feeling to.  All these things might add to the natural receptivity that is inherent in the different energies, or yin/yang of the universe.  

The point being, IMHO, the best thing you can do for yourself now is to let go of the guilt, don't hang on to it---let it go.  And if anger, or rage, helps you do that, than express that.

Anonymous

MM, I am an astral warrior and I am part of a warrior house known as Abode of the Lion. We have handled many cases and the head of the group has decades of experience and quite an occultist resume. I am interested in helping you, and, with your permission, will send your story to the Abode of the Lion group.

Not only do astral warriors fight off entities of darkness, we also help heal and set things straight again. Many skills are involved, and I would like for you to learn how to protect yourself in the future, if you are interested. You can PM me if you like, or email me.

masochist monk

I went through many processes, and as you read further you will understand these processes. I still have so much to learn however. I conquered my guilt, and in fact stop and let go and let myself enjoy it. Being a women with pride, it was difficult to cope when I been degraded in such a way. I was very close in committing suicide. As soon as I started to enjoy the physical pain, the sexual stimulation, it stopped. It is quite interesting, I still have my obstacles, the defects I have he uses against me. In a way I became stronger from this experience. I came so far, and even surprised myself. I believe that the reason "Tim" experience this "unusual phenomenon" is because he was being manipulated also by this entity or other entities. He wanted to hurt me, and since my barriers were so strong, I was anti social in a way, and confuse me (because I felt unconditional love for the man) and try to make me think it was romantic love. It was all a prank. As a women, I had to go through the most degrading thing any women could go through. I was taken advantage of and although rage was not a issue, my guilt and despair was.

Sare

Dear Masocist Monk have you ever heard about the stocholm syndrom, The stocholm syndrom makes a person identify and and see it from their perps view.This is whaty happens to a person put under extrem stress.

It would be wise and continue your learning prosses whit out him and take the help. Ender helped me and I was possesd by 3 eneties and he got rid of all of them easy

Anonymous

Masochist monk, I feel for you and what you have gone through, and I hope you realize that there are a great many out there who support you. It often takes great courage to support someone these days because society sometimes makes it seem 'uncool.' However, for those who do reach out and help others and for those who have the guts to ask for help for things like your problems, it says a lot about them. You are a brave soul.

Naiad780

I read your story and I wanted to say a couple of things that struck me:

a) you DO NOT deserve to die.  If this happened to someone else, I am willing to bet that you would feel sympathy for that person and would want to help them.  Be as compassionate to yourself as you would to another person.

b)  You are a human being, remember that.  Not a bad r stupid person, not a female who was assaulted by evil things, not a crazy girl, none of that.  You are a human being just like all of us, a human being who is essentially good.  Whatever is hurting you is NOT.  

PM me if you like.  I'm sorry you're in such a confusing and painful situation.

masochist monk


Tyciol

Arg I'm so lazy, still haven't read it. Sorry, I WILL keep me promise.

Don't hate the womens, they's lovelies.

Defender

Dear MM,

      Crazy spirits aren't they +P Wish I could meet one of them, but anyway, i'm just starting out in all of this "astral" stuff , no expert, and wanted to ask you...you started being hounded by praying to purgatory spirits? I'm sorry, I read halfway through the page then my eyes got tired (12:54 A.M.).  Anyway I just wanted to know...(and can't correctly formulate my thoughts at this moment).

      Oh yeah, have you tried astral projecting? Newbie question I know, on a board for Astral Projectors, but you could possible confront this person? I saw a technique for astral projecting earlier on the Astral Consciousness Forum in which you don't have to calm down or anything.
Something about thinking about a dream? I'm too tired now too see heh.

Best Wishes,
Warren
Hows it goin? Are you the guy who keeps telling me to beware? 'Cause I'll tell you where to be... out of my face!  --Master Shake

masochist monk

Quote from: DefenderDear MM,

      Crazy spirits aren't they +P Wish I could meet one of them, but anyway, i'm just starting out in all of this "astral" stuff , no expert, and wanted to ask you...you started being hounded by praying to purgatory spirits? I'm sorry, I read halfway through the page then my eyes got tired (12:54 A.M.).  Anyway I just wanted to know...(and can't correctly formulate my thoughts at this moment).

      Oh yeah, have you tried astral projecting? Newbie question I know, on a board for Astral Projectors, but you could possible confront this person? I saw a technique for astral projecting earlier on the Astral Consciousness Forum in which you don't have to calm down or anything.
Something about thinking about a dream? I'm too tired now too see heh.

Best Wishes,
Warren

I warned you its a long story

you have to read it all to understand

nothing about astral projection, its a story about possession, obviously

Defender

Yeah, I know, was merely suggesting you could try AP to confront whatever it is  :wink:

Best Wishes,
Warren
Hows it goin? Are you the guy who keeps telling me to beware? 'Cause I'll tell you where to be... out of my face!  --Master Shake

ARCHDRAGON

a crazy suggestion I know but it may satisfy you to violate the man that did this to you in the astral realm, you could cause him much pain, and you may enjoy watchig him suffer. and then you could stop when he is a nervous wreck on the brink of madness.
do the kirby dance <('.'<) <('.')> (>'.')>
<(>)<)>(<)>>(<<)>>(<<)>(<)>()<(<)()(<<()><

masochist monk

Quote from: ARCHDRAGONa crazy suggestion I know but it may satisfy you to violate the man that did this to you in the astral realm, you could cause him much pain, and you may enjoy watching him suffer. and then you could stop when he is a nervous wreck on the brink of madness.

hahaha

now the question is .. how!

muahahaha!