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The naked truth of chronic negativity...

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Nay

Thank-you Haematite, for your words that ring true for alot of us.  It is unfortunte that we must go through sometimes, what are horrific things.  I too feel they are lesson and as bad as they were, I wouldn't change a thing.

Take care,

Nay [^]

blueflame

Could someone explain how thinking positive can actually help you? The stated "benefits" seem more of an illusion rather than a consistant advantage over negative/no thought.

shedt

quote:
Originally posted by McArthur

quote:
Originally posted by Nay

I have had a few problems with negs, and dealt with them, then was on my happy way once again.


I am glad you have solvd your own problems and are now happy with your life, good for you. But that still does not give you the right to go pointing fingers at those who are still suffering. Your tone doesn't sound like you are being helpful, its sounds smarmy.


explain what you mean about her tone ? I'm confused. How is she pointing fingers ? this article is about positive thoughts. Which came first, the egg or the chicken ?

quote:

Well, I hope you read the post again, but keep a open mind this time and oh, be honest with yourself, and ask..."why in the world did I get so defensive and angry?"


quote:

I ripped the article apart because i felt a duty to do so and to show that its not really going to be helpful to those suffering neg problems. Read my other post above about my friend also.


why is it not helpful ? If you have a problem with negs, and it could be because of your own attitude, how is being positive not helpful if that will effect the negs ?

this normally would make me sad, but I choose to not let it. And Nay i hope it does not bother you.

thanks for posting a wonderful article, and for trying too helps those out, wether it is negs effecting them or themselves.

let's work together at helping each other be happy and positive, no matter what is happening !

shedt

quote:
Originally posted by Dark Knight

quote:
And I will not be pulled into your hate and anger. So, you two don't like the post..that is obvious....well, move on to the next thread then.


No you don't have to, Nay, you still have your own to deal with. You never got over it, you didn't even move through it, you walked away and avoided it and claimed victory...you didn't do anything.




Are you Nay ? what gives you the right too tell her what she has gone through ? you don't like too be told the same thing. two wrongs don't make a right. you talk about respect, but you don't show it. If the article does not apply to you that does not mean it does not apply to others. I found it helpful, and so i thank Nay and the author.

Dark Knight

quote:
explain what you mean about her tone ? I'm confused. How is she pointing fingers ? this article is about positive thoughts. Which came first, the egg or the chicken ?


Shedt, she uses her experiecne as an absolute without asking or caring about what other people need. She has shown nothing other than a smarmy, insensitive, selfish attitude towards the suffering of others, reduces everything to an easy hurdle, an easy fix.

And the egg came first, it had to be fertilized to make the chicken.

Shedt, attitude is not a guarantee or tell all to attract negs.



shedt

quote:
Originally posted by Dark Knight

quote:
explain what you mean about her tone ? I'm confused. How is she pointing fingers ? this article is about positive thoughts. Which came first, the egg or the chicken ?


Shedt, she uses her experiecne as an absolute without asking or caring about what other people need. She has shown nothing other than a smarmy, insensitive, selfish attitude towards the suffering of others, reduces everything to an easy hurdle, an easy fix.


i personally don't see her doing this. I don't remember her saying that everything she says is absolute. she is trying to help others.

quote:

And the egg came first, it had to be fertilized to make the chicken.

Shedt, attitude is not a guarantee or tell all to attract negs.




this is true, but having a positive attitude does not hurt. Like Spectral said, maybe the timing can be wrong, but i personally believe in the majority of times it will help.

James S

Hi Mick,
quote:
I could ask where these numbers come from but won't [:)]

No statistsics there Mick, just an observation. Besides, I don't bother much with statistics since it's been shown that 43.6% of all statistics are made up on the spot. [;)]

McArthur,
Once I was angry at the church, but I'm long over that. I just recall very clearly how many people were "relieved" of the responsibility of dealing with their own problems by over zealous ministers who could ascribe a demon for every situation. Funny how often those demons would return simply because the people believed the minister could just take it away with an aggressive prayer, and there was nothing more they had to do about it.

To all,
I know a lot of people come here because they've read PPSD and are looking for help. We all need to remain very much aware that while some genuinely are neg attacks, there are also a lot that aren't. Despite what some might think we don't turn anyone away, and we don't tell people it's all in their mind. With the exception of one or two members who have actually been banned from this site because of really thoughtless comments along these lines, no one here has ever turned their back on someone by telling them it's their own fault.

I've seen a lot of accusations along these lines, but I feel they are unfounded. If anyone wants to see for themselves how people who come here for help are treated, go back to the "Welcome to Psychic Self Defence" link, go to the drop-down box at the top right of the list of topics and select show all topics, then start from page 44 and work your way back.

Well over a year ago we had someone come onto the forum seeking healing help. This site almost got taken through court because the parents of this person found out about some of the "alternative" advice that was being given here to somone who had already been well and truly diagnosed with a known medical condition.
What I'm trying to say is that Robert's book does definitely have validity, but so too does the sciences of psychiatry and psychology. Don't ignore one just to take information from the other. The most successful holistic treatments use a combination of both physical AND metaphysical.

Just something to consider.....
James.

Anonymous

I agree. I try to remain happy and calm as much as I can. It has helped in countless situations. It is always necessary to resolve an issue, but one should move on from those issues as quickly as possible once they are resolved, lest they be stuck in their own negativity.

Nay

Well, I want to say thanks for the kind words, but when I made this thread I did not intend for my own personal experiences to be brought into the mix..that was in a different thread, which I have to admit I allowed myself and my ego, to take hold.  

I will not get into defending what I said about my experiences because it as all been said before..over, and over and over yet again!

I just hope more people will see the positive nature that this thread was intended to be.

And if smarmy, insensitive, selfish attitude towards the suffering of others, reduces everything to an easy hurdle, an easy fix. Means I am humorous, loving, and enjoys a good laugh, then thanks, DK!! I knew we could come to a understanding! [:D]

Hugs~

Nay.

Tayesin


Hi All,

McArthur and Rhinegirl,
Please understand this....Guilt is something we allow ourselves to feel, just because someone says you should be feeling guilty about something does not mean you must choose to do that.  You have the power, you can choose to respond in many ways.

Dogma is something that is fixed and immutable in the eyes of those who hold it dear.  What I expressed in my previous post comes from twenty years of spiritual practice and I am absolutely sure that this vision will be modified and refined, if not changed altogether, as the next twenty years go by.

Nothing that happens in any of the worlds can 'be' without a number of pre-requisites.....all the beings who are involved in any experience have contracted them-Selves to being part of it and the creative awareness we call God supplies the means through our choices of manifestation.  

The great souls that we are did make these agreements to help supply and be a part of all experiences we have,  and the proof that this is so is that it happens.  If this were not the case then none of it could happen. The same applies to our connections with Guides, it is a contracted agreement we made before incarnating to this world. So the neg that attacks you is only able to do so because we allowed it to be by the contracts we made,  and so the questions to ask are, What am I to learn from this contract?  Is this neg helping me to face my fears and misconceptions head on?  Am I going to be a victim or am I going to be empowered and learn from this experience ?  Lottsa choices there.

By taking responsibility for the part we play in what we experience we are empowering ourselves so that we no longer see ourselves as victims.  And it is the seeing ourselves as the victim that keeps us in that concept's mind-set, unable to be free from it until we see clearly and choose to do otherwise.

One thing that is quite difficult for us humans is to see and hear anything without it being filtered through our precious concepts.  We then react from a position of perceived 'injustice' or attack, instead of responding from open clarity.  It is normal for us to do so,  until we can bring ourselves to see the bigger pictures and understand that we are the masters of our destinies.  We have the choices, we only need to see that we do.

Love Always.[:)]

Dark Knight

quote:
i personally don't see her doing this.


Shedt, put yourself in the shoes of someone else instead of using your own experiences.

And timing is everything...you have to bring people back into Creation before the positive can even take root. Positive at the wrong time can hurt a great deal if someone is hanging by a thread. Get them safe first, validate their value, then be positive...doing that affirms everything.

quote:
Please understand this....Guilt is something we allow ourselves to feel, just because someone says you should be feeling guilty about something does not mean you must choose to do that. You have the power, you can choose to respond in many ways.


Tayesin, that's been the problem for the longest time. I just posted the five stages to grief and loss, one of which is guilt. People have to be allowed to feel to move through this crap, and everytime people here try to experience it, we're told we're negative. No one on this damn site respects and let's people under attack feel what is needed to feel to overcome this crap. No one sees it as part of being human. No, just the opposite, they're told they're negative, not taking repsonsiblity, etc, etc, and it's just ridiculous. People aren't healing, just the opposite they're stagnating and dying inside because of the blocks that are continuously thrown up. This has got to stop. It isn't helping and people are not healing the way they need to.



shedt

quote:
Originally posted by Dark Knight

quote:
i personally don't see her doing this.


Shedt, put yourself in the shoes of someone else instead of using your own experiences.


I am, I see no reason in insulting someone. the same as i don't see a purpose in stealing or hurting others.

quote:

And timing is everything...you have to bring people back into Creation before the positive can even take root. Positive at the wrong time can hurt a great deal if someone is hanging by a thread.


how so? maybe it can be the only thing that will save them. you should try thinking about this in more then one way. why must it only be the negative way ?

quote:
Get them safe first, validate their value, then be positive...doing that affirms everything.



just because one way will work for you does not mean another way will not work for others.

I have been at points in my life where all i need was something positive....

and so have others.

right now i just think about my unborn daughter in my wife's belly !

[:P]

shedt

quote:
Originally posted by Dark Knight

quote:
No one on this damn site respects and let's people under attack feel what is needed to feel to overcome this crap. No one sees it as part of being human. No, just the opposite, they're told they're negative, not taking repsonsiblity, etc, etc, and it's just ridiculous. People aren't healing, just the opposite they're stagnating and dying inside because of the blocks that are continuously thrown up. This has got to stop. It isn't helping and people are not healing the way they need to.


first, i think personally you should stop generalizing everyone.

you should take a moment too see the mistakes that you yourself are doing, like i believe this is too be.

you need to take responsibility too, just like everyone else.





Dark Knight

quote:
first, i think personally you should stop generalizing everyone.

you should take a moment too see the mistakes that you yourself are doing, like i believe this is too be.

you need to take responsibility too, just like everyone else.


Actions speak louder than words. You take the responsiblity and set the example, especially since you aren't under attack or suffering. I've taken enough responsiblity, and you haven't taken a shred.




shedt

quote:
Originally posted by Dark Knight

quote:
first, i think personally you should stop generalizing everyone.

you should take a moment too see the mistakes that you yourself are doing, like i believe this is too be.

you need to take responsibility too, just like everyone else.


Actions speak louder than words. You take the responsiblity and set the example,

quote:
especially since you aren't under attack or suffering. I've taken enough responsiblity, and you haven't taken a shred.



how do you know what i am going through ?

why are you being hostile with me ?

actions do speak louder then words.

my actions now are communicating with you, being honest and not hostile. I'm taking the responsibility of not being hostile and trying too a nice person.

Dark Knight

quote:
how do you know what i am going through ?

why are you being hostile with me ?

actions do speak louder then words.

my actions now are communicating with you, being honest and not hostile. I'm taking the responsibility of not being hostile and trying too a nice person.

You're responding for the hell of responding with no real questioning. This is where I am done.



shedt

quote:
Originally posted by Dark Knight

quote:
how do you know what i am going through ?

why are you being hostile with me ?

actions do speak louder then words.

my actions now are communicating with you, being honest and not hostile. I'm taking the responsibility of not being hostile and trying too a nice person.

You're responding for the hell of responding with no real questioning. This is where I am done.



I asked valid questions i thought.

how do you know what is going on in my life right now if i do not communicate it ?

I have a responsibility too the others here, to myself, and too you, too be honest, kind and say what i believe too be needed.

need

Isn'tit too shallow to think that just by being positive, then positivity will return to you. If you're negative then you'll receive same.  Life is really a lot more than any cliche we could ever read. The issue with this type of thinking is that we only have one segment of the truth, instead of the full truth.

These sayings are only guidelines accepted by most, with no clear validation, they do not address complexity ,what happens when these guidelines do not seem to work.

oreo_renegade

Not pointing fingers at anyone...


It's such a shame when one consider's themself 'enlightened/awakened/etc.'


By accepting any belief as truth, we rule out the possibility for other's




Let's be a little less FACTual and more embracing of others, after all, ANYTHING is possible (even the possibility of nothing ;))

shedt

quote:
Originally posted by oreo_renegade

Not pointing fingers at anyone...


It's such a shame when one consider's themself 'enlightened/awakened/etc.'


By accepting any belief as truth, we rule out the possibility for other's




Let's be a little less FACTual and more embracing of others, after all, ANYTHING is possible (even the possibility of nothing ;))



for sure ! if we take one thing as absolute then we won't want too learn about something else. i try too have as many perspectives as i can.

Dark Knight

quote:
Isn'tit too shallow to think that just by being positive, then positivity will return to you. If you're negative then you'll receive same. Life is really a lot more than any cliche we could ever read. The issue with this type of thinking is that we only have one segment of the truth, instead of the full truth.

These sayings are only guidelines accepted by most, with no clear validation, they do not address complexity ,what happens when these guidelines do not seem to work.


No, it's not the black and white reality people thing it is.

You have to feel things out and test, and testing means chekcing to see if you are right or wrong. But you have to take responsiblity at some point, you can't keep philosophizing forever over whether or not something is or is not happening. The same way people had to hop in a boat and sail out to see if the world really was flat and they'd fall off the end of the world, you have to try things out to see if they are true. We are different and experiences are complex, we are not so different that we are aliens. If I shoot you with a gun, I'm theorizing you will cry ouch and start to bleed. Just a theory...and I'll cling to that one concept as more often than not it tends to be true. Many different things can happen, but I don't see anyone checking to see what the exact conditions are that making the situation to be in the first place.





Haematite

Hi to all[:)]
In my oppinion we shouldn't let our Egos to talk instead of us. I mean that this topic became something like battle-field... All we are people clever enough not to let the low passions to prevent our improvement. Every time we're going to think or say or do something we should think first of the consequences because every little thing that is happening reflects to the Universe. So, stricking to the subject about the negativity - maybe one should learn to assume a responsibility for their actions knowing that everything is important and not accidental. That kind of problems could be soluted only from the inside. We should let our soul lead our life - then we'll see that most of the problems disappear.
Be safe[:)]

Mick

quote:
Originally posted by need

Life is really a lot more than any cliche we could ever read. The issue with this type of thinking is that we only have one segment of the truth, instead of the full truth.

These sayings are only guidelines accepted by most, with no clear validation, they do not address complexity ,what happens when these guidelines do not seem to work.


I think also that we are multi facetted beings and the whole (as much as we can know it) needs to be attended to and not cherry picked for the easily assimulated bits.

I don't see why guilt is a problem emotion if it is doing what we expect it to, that is feel guilty where guilt is deserved. But wallowing in guilt probably does no one any good but as a means to identify and address something or other, why not?
Like a pain is a warning, look to the cause and address it!
Mick

"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety."

-- Benjamin Franklin, 1759

McArthur

quote:
Originally posted by Tayesin

The great souls that we are did make these agreements to help supply and be a part of all experiences we have,  and the proof that this is so is that it happens.  If this were not the case then none of it could happen.


This is not a proof, just bad logic coupled with an almost dogmatic doctrine. How do you know what you may have agreed to before incarnation? Who told you this?

quote:

The same applies to our connections with Guides, it is a contracted agreement we made before incarnating to this world.


Ah "the Guides" told you this did they? May i ask if you have a spirit guide?
quote:


So the neg that attacks you is only able to do so because we allowed it to be by the contracts we made,


This idea sounds just like something a clever neg would come up with. So its possible for me to go up to someone with a gun and say "oh by the way we agreed that i could murder you before we were incarnated, sorry that you dont agree with that or even remember but thats my belief." If it wasn't agreed to i couldnt possibly be able to pull the trigger according to what you are saying could i? Dont you see how dangerous that kind of belief is? Are you saying that Hitlers beliefs that he was destined to do what he did are correct?

Perhaps all those millions of Jews would disagree too. Saying that the victims of the Holocaust somehow agreed to be murdered is similar to being a holocaust denyer.
quote:

and so the questions to ask are, What am I to learn from this contract?  Is this neg helping me to face my fears and misconceptions head on?  Am I going to be a victim or am I going to be empowered and learn from this experience ?  Lottsa choices there.


You obviously have not come face to face with a serious neg attack. Noone in their right mind would consider such torture as something beneficial or even desired. Many lives have been, and are being, messed up by negs. Whats beneficial about that?
quote:

By taking responsibility for the part we play in what we experience we are empowering ourselves so that we no longer see ourselves as victims.


Right, how about i introduce you to a 9 year old kid that has been sexually abused and you repeat that sentence to him/her? I find it ridiculous that any sane person would even consider it.
quote:

And it is the seeing ourselves as the victim that keeps us in that concept's mind-set, unable to be free from it until we see clearly and choose to do otherwise.


While i agree with part of this, i still disagree with the New Age view that the victim somehow agreed (before incarnation- something that can not be proven) to being victimised to start with. Why cause more suffering, why would anyone choose to suffer? Do Africans choose to starve? How about i take you to Africa where you can preach to them that its all because of some pre-incarnation contract that they are suffering? What do you think their reaction might be?


McArthur

quote:
Originally posted by need

Isn'tit too shallow to think that just by being positive, then positivity will return to you. If you're negative then you'll receive same.

This is something for the Philisophical Forum. And while i tend to agree with the main thrust of it, it has nothing to do with Psychic Attacks. You wont stop a psychic attack just by being positive. Saying so seems to imply that all psychic attacks are caused by whether one is negative or positive (which inlcudes a hidden accusation that "its all your fault you are under attack for being negative". which is a ridiculous assumption.

Rober Bruce has come under many attacks for varying reasons. Are we to assume he is a negative person then?