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Thanks Stookie...

I had thought almost the same thing, since I have been reading in dream interpretation books (about the projected subconscious thoughts).  You needn't worry about raising or sinking my hopes, I just needed a set of eyes that was not so close to me (without biased judgment, I mean) to see this dream, and tell me what they thought.

I also wish you peace and love in the new year.  And thank you for taking the time to try and answer my post.

-Stan

^^Bump!^^

Hy Guys!

It's been a long time since I posted here, and I've finally had a few OBE's, but that's another topic for another day.  Why I'm posting here is this:

Back in March, my grandmother suffered a massive stroke that left her paralyzed on her right side and having difficulty speaking and swallowing.  As you might imagine, this has left her bed ridden for most of the time, unless my mother and I lift her out and put her into a chair.  She has always been a fighter (and a devout Christian).

Last night, I had a dream that left me with a strange 'What if?' and confused feeling.  It is a little fuzzy to remember due to the fact that I am on MAJOR antidepressants and sleeping pills, but I remember it enough for it to bug me.

In the dream, my grandma was laying in her hospital bed, as usual, and I was sitting on my mother's bed beside her (just as it is set up in reality) talking, and laughing about something... I can't remember what it was.  All of a sudden, my grandma looked down a her foot (the paralyzed one), and began to move first the big toe, then the ankle.  I remember feeling so surprised and happy that I started crying, and screamed for my mother to come and see what had just happened.  Before my mother could come (I should say that throughout the dream, I never saw my mom, which is strange because she is always in the house with us) grandma realized that she could move the leg at the knee and at the hip.  Although her paralyzed arm was still, well, paralyzed, she asked me to help her stand up, which I did.

Once grandma was standing, she wanted to walk to the kitchen.  I remember I was walking beside her with my hand around her back, just in case she should lose her balance or suddenly become paralyzed again.

When we got to the kitchen, we were standing by the back door, and I was showing her how my mom had reorganized a lot of the things in that room, and that I would help her to find anything that she needed.  It was then that grandma said something to me (I can't remember what it was), and I realized that even the slurred speech had corrected itself.  Again I had this overwhelming feeling of joy so powerful that I burst into tears.

This is all that I can remember of the dream, save for the fact that when I woke up, I had this (albeit short-lived) sense of profound comfort and joy.

Could this dream have been prophetic?  Could my mind just be trying to let me see what I want to see (be it real or not)?  Am I going out of my mind from pushing myself to the limit to be a nearly perfect caregiver?  I just don't know, I mean, I wish with all my heart for something like this dream to occur in reality, but the doctors once told us when she first had the stroke that she probably would never recover to the extend I saw in my dream.

Like I said it's been a while since I posted anything on this site, but when I used to post, you guys were phenomenally helpful and I need your help again.

Sorry for the long post and I thank you in advance for all your replies.

-Stan

Hi all,

Last night, in bed, I guess I had fallen asleep, but I woke up unable to move.  I didn't feel like I was out of body, but I was gripped with a horribly intense fear (of what, I don't know), I didn't sense any presence in my room, but was horribly afraid, none the less.

Is this the sleep paralysis I read about or am I losing my mind?  Does anyone have any suggestions, how to kill that horrible fear so I can try an exit technique? (if this was sleep paralysis, that is).

I know my questions may seem a little dumb, but I am really new to this AP stuff.  Thanks in advance!


Peace and love,

Stan

I will keep working at it and hopefully someday I will be able to actually AP... At least I got rid of the fear of hell that I had a while back... Whenever it comes, I just say 'if I'm going there, I can't stop it, so what is the sense of fearing it?'.


Peace and love,

Stan

Hello All!

During my meditation/OBE practice session last night, I noticed something new.

While my eyes were closed, I began to see faces, and objects, but this wasn't like the way I can see with my physical eyes open.  It was almost as if I could 'feel' the images, like I knew what they were and I knew the details of each one, but could not 'see like in the physical'.

Does anyone know, am I on the right track?  It feels like it to me, but I'm not 100% sure.


Peace and Love,
                 
Stan

Thanks for the response man, I will take your advice and let you know how it goes!

Hi all!  

This is my first post... so here goes:

All my life, I was raised Catholic.  I've read about saint's visions of Hell, Near Death Experiences and so on...

I've been trying to AP for a little over three months now, but there is a deep-rooted fear carried over from my Catholic raising of going to Hell.  I know from my reading that some think we create our own hell, some think that there is no hell (we just go on in another form) and so on.  But for some reason, I can't get this fear out of my subconscious.  It affects me to the point where when I lay down to practice AP, the fear and anxiety is so overwhelming that I can't concentrate, or I end up with that weird 'goosebumps' feeling.  This is proving to an extremely stubborn obstacle.

Is there anyone who has experience getting deep rooted beliefs 'out of your system'?  If so, I could really use the help!

Thanks!

P.S.  If Mr. Bruce is floating around in here, could you help me out here too!  You have tons more experience than I.