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PinkStar, your problem is your perspective.

Watch this SHORT video. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOM9LHZhLlA

It's my favourite Tom Campbell video of all time.  It's concise and to the point on what your problem is.

I appreciate your effort and watched the video.
I don't want to be vulgar but if you put a ribbon(positive thinking) on a pile of $hit it will be still a pile of $hit.
I guess Tom Campbell lives in the USA and he has a Master's degree from (Purdue) University. So he has every opportunity to get what he wants.
What if Campbell was born in Africa and he is so poor, so he can barely eat? Still he was the same guy with the same attitude?
Although I'm not starving and not poor, but something, that I told, still missing.

By observing not only what's outside of you, but also inside of you as well. Listen to your passions, your desires. What are your goals, your aspirations?
You don't need to answer this here. But you do need to answer that to yourself.

My passion was ,,magic". When I read the first Harry Potter book I get so obsessed, and became very disappointed when I didn't get the acceptance letter to Hogwarts at age 11.
And I always wanted to believe that I can create beautiful and crazy things from thin air. But you grow up and realize it's cannot possible and you are stuck in a world with full of barriers.
You have to work in order to survive, so you can work to survive.. Snake bites its tail. After work you can engage yourself in boring activities just to spend time.
Helping others(especially animals) is ok, but it's not my thing and doing material like hobbies are boring.
Sorry if I'm not an easy case, but I think your advices were really helpful but the picture is still not clear.

I think many of us here have felt that way before, myself included. I always knew this wasn't my "home" and I when I was young I felt that I wanted to go back as well. But then "life" kicked in and showed me not only purpose as a whole, but my purpose here as well.

Thank you for your answer.
Can I ask you,how you find your purpose?

!Warning!:English is not my first language.

  Since I was a child I've started thinking this world is not my home, and I've wanted to leave it.
I read a lot of comments here about helping people and INTENTIONS, but the truth is, I don't really like people nor I hate them, but don't care about them. From childhood to these days I like to being alone and isolating from people. Everyday my brain asked ,,The Question": When we'll leave?
It's not depression, I think depression doesn't really exist, It's just you realize that you are powerless to live in peace without others harming you in any way.
  Getting to the point: If I exterminate my body I can go to the place when I feel at home and I'll be powerful enough to not being harmed?
I know, one of you wrote comments to suicidal people like: if they kill themselves they have to come back to learn the lesson, and their higher self is more intelligent than they. But what the bloody hell can I do If I'm just hate living here, happy pills can't help either?