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I shift into a huge dragon rather often in my dreams. I also had to learn how to fly and maneuver in the air.. getting pretty good at it now but the takeoff is still a bit tricky ._.;

maybe realizing that you don't have to be here is the reason? I can't say I am very skilled at talking to "guides" or my own subconscious. But one answer I repeatedly get is that I alone can choose what to do with my life... live it... end it. Either way there is something to learn from it. How can we say something is wrong unless we have experienced it? Sometimes we have to fail at something before we can understand it . Sometimes realizing you are done and need to end something, on your own initiative can be one hell of a challenge. So is it really that far-fetched that to know when to end it can actually be the reason why we chose to come here?

I believe we all have different reasons why we come here. I believe we all have to fail as much as we succeed to get the greatest understanding of things, and it is nothing to be afraid of.

you never die.

Believe me or not but I fully agree, we never die. But I believe we can choose where we want our consciousness to be. Suicide is just one way to move ourselves from here to somewhere else. If everyone truly believed that we never die there would be no need to be sad or hurt when someone "dies". They just move on to different things and new challenges. Everyone we love and care for is just a thought away no matter if we are in a physical world or the astral.

It isn't irrelevant, it really resonates with me. I often think about ending my life. I am not depressed or anything, don't have problems. Just don't feel like belonging here. So I often wonder, why should I stay somewhere that feels irrelevant, why should I keep doing something that makes me feel like I had enough of it. And I am kind of curious, too.

Exactly! I feel quite the same. Quite ironic actually, I took reiki healing courses to be able to deal with and understand my emotions and energies better. But now I feel and know that indeed I may be able to help people here in some way, I can make people smile with my art and writing.. yet ... I feel as I've been around for a long time and I've got some dirt to clean up. But I could just as well do that somewhere else. I feel like a spectator, I watch and learn things every day. Life is nice and there are awesome people in this world. I feel as I have greater things to do "somewhere else" and is somewhat just slugging around procrastinating.
In my dreams lucid or not I often find myself trying to cross over to this other world that I am constantly drawn to. I am tested and questioned every time if I am ready. This far I have failed, mostly out of fear. Maybe it is just dreams, but somewhere I know that it is possible. If there is anything I've learned in life it is to be persistent and trust your instincts. For now my instincts says, hey, you can do a lot of things here. Have a wonderful life and gain a lot of experience and help a lot of people on the way. But there is also another option, a more challenging one but just as important.

Life will never stop hurling surprises at you, maybe I will feel different about it in a few months from now.. years. Or, I'll live my entire life just to breath my last breath thinking my life really just was a kind of vacation and that I'm late for work :F

It's easy to analyse it in hindsight... much more difficult to explain when you are at the bottom of the mountain unable to see over the peak.

I've been on the bottom (i think, but hey how can you ever truly know?) But I crawled up from it on my own, I wanted to die then because I felt like excrement, I knew there were some people caring deeply for me... there were also those who wanted to control my life and make decisions for me. It was at a point where I felt that I had nothing that I felt at peace. Where I realized this life is my own and I alone can shape it as I want.... but that is kinda the thing ... there is nothing in this world I can't have if I put my mind to it... so where is the challenge?

I'm gonna try not to get too deep into this subject but I saw many people here suggesting that someone thinking of committing suicide should talk to a professional.
This subject is very personal to me because it is something I've been thinking about a lot and it is very close to my heart. I used to be suicidal and did sadly tell a "professional" about it and it actually made things worse. My dad, who I never really had a chance to know suffered for his whole life because of depression and probably a great deal of other things hung himself not long after I met him "for real". He had been in contact with psychologists and other pros for probably his entire life.
Of course my dads death had an effect on me that I haven't been able to grasp yet. I knew he felt as if he was done with life, even with the depression he felt as if he had had a good life. I might have gotten over my will to kill myself, yet I can't shake the feeling that I don't really want to be here.
People say it is bad to even think about ending your own life and really aren't comfy about talking about the reason why the affected person wants to end it. But I think it can be really important to talk about WHY and gain an understanding on why those feelings are there. Thinking about it like I have, I have to admit I've actually come to the conclusion that it might be ok to end your life if you truly feel that is right for you. Without fear or regret lurking behind it.

I would never advice anyone to suicide. But neither would I call them crazy or stupid for it. It is a very personal decision and saying it is wrong just because the people that care about you will be sad is a terrible mistake. You would live and suffer for others instead of living for your own sake. It is pretty much the same as being dead right there.
I've read some near death experiences from people who has attempted suicide and they all seem to vary depending on belief, so maybe the way we experience death no matter what way is truly depending on what we think will happen. If we believe we will be punished, we will suffer even after death. But if we truly believe we are doing the right thing, maybe things can be sorted out outside this physical realm.

ungh... I just wanted to throw this out there, I apologize if it is totally irrelevant and repeating something :S
 

I think who-am-i is trying to say he/she was possessed and that whatever it was is coming back.... or something...

something a bit more advanced that you might be looking for. Stuff that should keep you busy for years... or lifetimes.

Now you got me interested too Stookie!!! D:

Of course she would get agitated if you pretend that they mean nothing to you when she knows that you know ._.
Talk to her more and find out what she wants :3

I want to comment on this post so badly and write a long rant on how I disagree with the idea of the whole light vs dark thing ... actually I disagree with this whole post .. but if this is what you seriously believe I'm afraid my rant will be a waste of words and time ._.

But I will say this, there is no war. Guardians/angels/spirit guides won't abandon you for screwing up or doing stupid things. They will always be there to help you get back into one piece when you're ready.
And I'm pretty sure there is no protection to be taken off anyone either since no one is ever in any real danger.  

Finally figured out how to do this! This is my newest :3

If Xanth is right the robber should never break in in the first place

I'd rather report a successful obe then constantly asking questions, but hey! You guys are so helpful in here :3 Now I'm sure this as anything can be solved with practice and patience... but that is kinda why I am now loosing sleep over it now too. 
I am making some progress though, earlier I made a post about a different problem I had, but thanks to this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRar8IOwic8&feature=BFa&list=PLEB923BB17E5849A3&lf=plpp_video
that Lionheart posted somewhere that seem to have sort of vanished.

I've also started to meditate every day for an hour or a half.

But now when I shut out all the mind shatter when trying to AP I end up just laying fully conscious for hours... or half asleep without getting any rest. I also managed to startle myself in that state by touching the cold bedroom wall with my knee ... ._.;
So I guess something is up it is just not progressing into anything else.
I tried to push it a bit after 3 hours of that madness by focusing my eyes behind my eyelids and I did start feeling changes but I also started to clench causing me such discomfort I had to flip over and my body just screamed as it was somehow asleep and I forced it to move ..

Oh I did manage to move my astral arms around some night ago by doing the above in reversed order but even then I realized I could be doing it all night without actually getting anywhere.

It feels like my mind has become too ... "active" now and I can't turn it off. And I don't mean active as in a ton of random thoughts but just ... too conscious ... so I can't start dreaming or AP because it requires thought for action right? Or am I wrong and something should just happen without me needing to think it?   
   

"I feel like I am due for a chakra tune up for some reason"

Astral-Trea (sent you a pm)
If this is how you feel and don't think you could do it yourself, you can definitely try it out. It is quite an experience if you find a good one. I don't know how the healers work outside the city I was living in but I do hope they work in a similar way... it is totally worth it if they do ._.

Hello Astral-Trea, I'm a reiki master myself and I've been to other masters for help with astral projection, though my problems wouldn't be fixed with some healing sessions so I can't tell if it can help ... but it can aid in removing or revealing the causes that may prevent it.

Jdeadevil : thank you, think I got it through some japanese website

Well, don't panic. Try not to be afraid, it will just make whatever it is more eager to screw around. You can always try to ward it off by visualizing a bright white light filling up your house and your surroundings. Ask your guardians/spirit guides to chase it away, or if you are the brave kind you could always try to meditate and ask this thing what it wants.

I feel bad about posting a watermarked image here so I just link to my deviantart profile instead :3 (hope thats ok ^^;)

http://frostnight.deviantart.com/

This is me being awesome :'D

Hello I'm 22, and I've been interested in lucid dreaming and astral projection for years. I've managed to have a few lucid dreams and manages to move around my dreams pretty well but I have yet to manage a real conscious AP. Not sure why, I've managed to get to some part with 3d darkness vision or extreme heat but other then that my body/soul just seem to refuse to do it xD A healer/shaman told me my guardian is blocking me because I wouldn't be able to deal with it, but I will keep trying and convince myself it is all fine :3 This forum is a great source of information and motivation for that ^^

Nice to meet you all! 

I'm no expert on magic but I have experience with a lot of bad energy inherited from dead relatives and cursing myself. I think the best way to ward off bad energy/magic is to simply not allow it to affect you. It can only touch you if you believe it can. It might sound too easy but it is all about willpower.

Keep doing whatever you are doing and see what happens.
Sounds like you are getting close at least !

Is there no way for you to end those unwanted relationships? Even if their life might drastically change without you to cling on to it is apparently not what you wanted, so what is stopping you from removing them from your life?
If you need a new start, isn't it possible for you to move away to some different place and start over from scratch?

I'd really prefer to just have internet and a few good video games, and sit in my house or go walking down the road.

That is how my life was after I moved away from home. Just me and whatever I chose to have in it.

You could always try again and see if you can contact this being again

Oh no, dreaming about knowing it is a dream without actually being lucid is so annoying xD Ever failed at a successful reality check? I hold my nose and try to breath ... it always works. But sometimes when I can still breath even if I'm holding my nose in the dream I keep thinking ... "maybe I'm not squeezing hard enough"..... ._:

I used to look for a good place for role play, some of the MSN pages were great but then it shut down... Other forums I found for it were dead , and the only active rp people I've found only want some gay or other romance stuff! I want serious ,life danger  adventures that forces your character to develop an original personality not sleazy bedroom talk >:C

Astral pulse is pretty much my only source of a social life too besides deviantart and wattpad, but because of my lack of art and writing that is pretty dead too.

I wish you luck on your hunt for someone to talk to, though old cats are pretty good too... :3

/silwer

Hello , griffo welcome to astral pulse I haven't managed to AP myself yet but I think all you have to do is just keep doing whatever you are doing and it will happen automatically whenever you are ready  

Sounds very similar actually, my sacral chakra has always been the one screwing up the most.
I love how this works, the same night I posted this I lay down to try and deeply relax myself before sleep. I'm starting to get rather quick at slowing my breathing but this time I noticed more clearly what that discomfort is about. The whole left side of my body is frozen up and terrified of any meditation/energy practice. It just refuses to be a part of it and the more I relax the more it fights back. I poked it with questions a bit and got that it is afraid because of something that has happened before, that it will get hurt again or that something will happen.

It is funny that you've mentioned past lives, I talked to a healer once who mentioned that I've also had many lives where I have been a victim of brutal deaths. My personal experience is that I've also had a life where I was quite a hateful killer with no mercy or regret. (I've met this one in my dreams and it is an angry stubborn soul that doesn't want to chill out and move on...)
In my current life I've already had a bunch of karma to rid myself of since it was passed on by generations of my family, and I've faced my punishment for betrayal of a friend in a past life. So it makes sense when you say there might be something from the past  influencing the setbacks I experience ...   

I don't know much about "retrieving" past personalities but I'll look in to it,

Thank you a lot Mendel, you just gave me a big part of the puzzle and suddenly it all makes sense !