Messages

the only answer i found some time ago....well there was no answer (kind of), there is some sort of "i am." writen in silence.

what is a tree if it is not the sum of all that there is...

jalef: you are talking about a language limitation. I myself can discover myself (more then i may think i am)

just my 2 cents

http://site.neogen.ro/ajutati_pe_anda/

sweetbliss: yup i am from there...here...nice 2 see u 2

data do u like 2 play computer games or do u like the sky or some sort of food or drink?

well that's how i like sunny mornings...and darkness...and light
if ur offended in my nickname u can call me eddie, simple as that

You believe in duality and relativity.

no i don't

Is that light or dark?

in only one word !!! EVOLUTION !!! ....long story....



How do you differentiate between these two people?
one is on the 2nd floor and the other on the 5th...they have both done what they need it...i never blamed murderers

most of the reasons are stupid (for me) but good enought for them as probably for me if i was in there shoes

A parasite or virus is created from the same material as we are. Does that make a parasite good for us?

it does not make it bad


well now...a sunny morning



I AM HERE FOR HELP, ANY ADVICE IS MOST WELLCOME AND I WILL DECIDE WHAT'S BEST FOR ME


i was offered last night the chance 2 get out
seems like there is love inseide me that is what i found out, but time flys... 0_o


one more thing...seems like emotions are broth 2 physical level now...all kind of new pains

i'll post later


thank you all
and one more thing in the end
...within the eternal harmony between end and infinity...

if i would have been depressed i wouldn't say that i'm dead...hell, when i am depressed i fell so alive much more alive then when i feel happy, why? cause i have to taste all life in all forms...pain, fear, love, hate

if a live in a denial, not my style, if there is a denial at a subtle level could be...

i do not take any pleasure in hurting others, i do not take any pleasure in hurting myself => i don't do it

i don't like pain in any form...i really don't like pain but i am not scared of it, if i need 2 "suffer a little" for my own good i don't refuse it

"dark heaven" is a concept about material world, this world, it has nothing with the spiritual one...

my pic?...nice one heh... now now....i like dark art as much as i enjoy "light" art...i find beauty in all forms and things, i won't reject something because is not in my belief system as i don't have one i think ...

if something is created is created from the same "material" as we are all and must serve a purpose so i can't say dark/malefic/morbid  or lovely/and all that

well yes there is goth and there is the rest
but most of the goth art is not art, ppl with bad taste created all kind of things...so there is not much left of it, but what is left is much higher then dead bodies and blood and all that....why am i talking about this


anyway i have just opened my eyes, waiting to fully wake up...

not sunny outside

thank you

i am now whaiting for the manual

if this is nirvana...it sux man believe me there is not that peace...peace of mind and spirit it is just that i don't feel...well yes i am not stressed, depressed not much of a worry so yes it has advantages but...

what can i say, so many times we confuse love with passion...so many times we r consumed by our desires

Living because of fear of dying is wrose that anything else. Why do all religions have to control people by fear?

how can u control a man differently? with money? not all of them but we all fear of something as we are so attached to this world...fear of fire as it could burn down our homes  of destruction, of being bold, and so many things



about poems  
i use to....sometimes

my final goal ultimate silence
if i am close, well i could be

thank you all


[edit]
well i work on my heart chakra, from time 2 time, i work most on my root and 3rd eye, and my crown started these days working...

thank you

[re edit]
about computers...i take some kind of pleasure in what i do and they keep me company till some point

i don't see in suicide an escape nor solution

i've been for a very long time and many times depressed but this is not the case now...there is nothing that is the problem...not much time ago i was so glad if i was depressed as it was the only way i could access feelings but if i went to deep in it, to glad, of course it went away

there is no fear and no anxiety
there is nothing

there must be a very sad place if there is no chocolate

about life...it has her beauty...in everything...i've learn that even more...i see that...but how could i enjoy all this...i can't return a smile 2 the moon...i can't cover the world with my love..."i can't smell the flowers"....

as i am a big block of stone...but there is hope for me as not even stone can hold it forever as there is rain and wind and floods and cold and heat


no this is not a case about suicide

Telos: i consider birth as well death, but where i am now...there are no words of comparison

data: there is no feeling of depression...no effort to be done as there is nothing, all i can do for some time is simulate feelings in my mind

if i'll get out of this this life time, i hope so as there will not be any spiritual progress for me if not...

but can i say i hope? now i "feel" better then never that hope is not an idea as once i believed, it's a feeling...and all i can is to believe that i feel

What is it that you lack? Love, compassion, peace? Why do you lack them? How do you define them? Where do you think you will get them? Ask yourself these questions. The solution is not outside - it's inside. Only you have the solution.

there is no more love inside of me, compassion none but i will never stop in helping others for free without expectations

peace i have as i am no warrior and i have no war to fight as i let the great river of life take me where it wants, where i am needed, trough all sort of situations

maybe i need an emotional sock, maybe i need to be reborn or amnesia...maybe i don't need anything but one thing i know for sure, there is nothing without feelings or emotions

Could you please say a bit more about how you arrived at all of these conclusions? It is hard for me to imagine what the condition you are describing would feel like or how it could have been caused. How are you so certain that your condition will not change again for the better?

there are no conclusions, only knowing and emptiness inside where once there was love, suffering, joy, regret...and all the feelings

what it caused it...well i do not know but maybe it is another desire of mine come true, as i said when i was little i was very emotional and many times i wondered if i would have felt better empty....

certain i am not but this state of mine every day got worst never better till now

i must say that this could be a huge blockage on my heart and solar chakras caused by fear but i never was a very scared human



thank you

today i have losted my last feeling as a human as an emotional creature, today i have become a complete empty vessel.

I AM DEAD

i have no words 2 put this as it is 2 much

i suffered in my life as i was a very emotional type of man and never believed that not feeling could felt so bad

i am dead inside, and now i believe that i will even die 4 good as there is not much 4 me to repay my mistakes with pure love and compation as there is nothing sad no more nor happy, as there is no more beauty nor uglyness, not even cold as heartless ppl are called.


As there is nothin left for me, i am lost, i felt in the dark abyss

ok tried it again...went a lil more but can't finish it

ok...

i've done this again, correct this time...i could't finish it i stopped cause it was way over myhead...

2 much energy...i'll try it again maybe 2day maybe 2morrow...one of this days

i don't know if it was kundalini...but it was way over me

thank you

don't thanks me...

but i appreciate

this is my next day i think and my body is on fire...my heart chakra and other parts of my body...

i have a lil headache since i woke up and that was more then 12 hours ago...

every time i think to that woman and ask 4 help is like my body taking fire...not unpleasant not pleasant

i don't think that is supposed to raise your kundalini over night anyway...but i think that could happen in time

http://www.yulius.net/prod0511.htm

here it goes

and this is free
i think it should go on that sticky link with kundalini

http://www.yulius.net/serv01.htm



and here is an experiment that i would like to comment with you

http://www.sahajayoga.org/experienceitnow/default.asp

so kind of stars i saw 2....

what was nicer that it was a 3D not 2D like most of my visualisation...

i was pretty tired this days and coudn't try this one...but as soon as i'll finish my work and get back on feet i'll do it again

i wonder what's inside of it

200$? that's a lot...anyway this is not a complicated device...no powersurce so what's inside...cristals, magnets, nothing?

well, that third eye meditation is powerfull...

i tried difftent tones on that "tthhhh"...i am not very sure about the corect one maybe u will help me out with that

i was also quite tired when tried that...

strong vibrations in third eye region, stron presure, no visuals...i'll give it a go for sevral days now and report

the workers like you chose to work new year eves...

think about that, don't think that u don't have an option that if you would quit you would be a looser or whatever...you can quite anytime you want and find something 2 do to get some money 2 eat, drink, take a bath...

we make are lives hard...yeah...stupid us...

i make my life hard, like all of us...we want 2 much outside but i guess that inside we don't want not even a small piece of dirt

oh...and if your wife wants to keep the house and u have 2 work for it do it cause u love her and if u don't quit everything and live your life as simple as your heart wants

btw don't listen my stupid advice, u shall know if u don't know already what 2 do, the thing is if u'll chose 2 do it or not



cacodemon: i know life aroun here ain't easy but...the USA ain't the land of honey and milk...i live a lil (or more) souther then u and believe me...the overall excrement is way bigger

u know, thea beauty of a poem is that u can roll it on any side see it from whatever angle an so on...it might be, it may not...

so what we need to activate it?

"Let it go!" ?

God?

will?

love?

well...


i kind of get it like sit back and enjoy the show

hmmm...i sell tickets

(that one was a joke, but this is intresting, way over my head)

the monk story is the best story...i know it for some time now...

it helped alot...hmmmm...but i must be sure cause i do not recall that i created this, everything started with my friends and my only thoughts were that she may have something very attractive in her aura...

thank you

i'll try to absorb the larve back into me if there is one...i'll continue my research and keep you posted. I'll try to speak with her and see what she will say, work out on my defense and all i can

thank you all

cristaphin: thank you

yes i share it, in a way, i do not mind, obsession she is not 4 me, i am thinking about her maybe 2 much but i'm not obsessed


"it's possible it's from the etheric larvae you've made of her and your own"

can u explain this cause i don't understand

"Looks like you are your own biggest threat." - i allways was and allways i will...and i have done alot stupide things...this is the reasons why i refused to atack her, the reason that i share my energy, the reason that deep inside me i let her in...i seek 2 but my days as "me agains the world" are finished for some time now, the idea is that i know how she feels in some way now, i accepted what is happening 2 me (in general terms) dump the fear, sitting down and enjoying the show (not doing anything  )...


i was in her same position not long before, maybe this is my scream for help ...he...


about the music...i like what i'm lisetening, about the intense part i don't get it...


and once again thank you, thank you all

she looks normal, but is she? that is what i'm asking...paranoia no way, there could be someone else atacking me but...

another starge thing or not...on the roumanina forum she is gay on that link she is straight...i shall talk with some people soon about her...

be carefull

last night i was attcacked, and hey, that was something...she was all over me and i believe that she is really ticked off. I shall take this an handle myself altrough she is much stronger i can face her and throw her away if i really want. I alowed her to do all this as i didn't care much. I shall see how i'll play this but now i have her...i know the rage/anger/fear...all she feels comes from what i ran from, and she rans 2. The diffrence is that i don't go and push my luck aroud with people.


yes this become more interesting that i believed first.

If u can tell me more things please help me out.

some one from this forum...

what is happening to my head, ok need assistance cause this is annoying...pls help me out