Hi everyone ..
I just joined this community, hopefully I'll learn even more things here. For the past month or so I've been interested in "OBE's", and I've been trying to learn as much about Astral Projection as possible. What led me to this, is kind of strange, well I guess not..... but the last year of my life (I'm 16) has been really difficult, hard, and confusing. I've been in Mental hospitals, diagnosed with everything from Bipolar disorder, Schizophrenia, Borderline Personality Disorder, Partial Epilepsy (partial seizures) - and the list goes on and on, and on. I've had bad health since a very young age, my anemia has been on and off, I have somewhat a weird heart (abnormal vessels, backwards tubes, etc..), and seizures after I eat food.... and, that list goes on and on too. What my point is, is ever since my long attack of "psychosis" , and since I've been somehwhat "in reality", I've been searching for some kind of answer. Something to make life less confusing, more calm, and less scary. Since I was little, my mum introduced me to many pagan religions, which were centered around "energy".. and inner strength.... and even though astral projection is far from a "religion" or isn't a "set of beliefs" - I find comfort and fascination in it.
When the doctors diagnosed me with psychosis, one of my constant "symptoms" I guess you could call it, involved many "psychic" encounters. While I was developing schizohphrenia or schizoaffective disorder, I became very sensitive to energys... I could feel spiritual presence.... and although it sounded very delusional at the time , "spirits" would give me messages, and from that I would gain knowlege of events yet to come and my inner self gained some kind of "psychic advantage".
Also , I recall, even in the mental hospitals, at night, I would go into this very relaxed state.. and my mind would become very aware of past and presence energies in the room where I was..and because I was delusional, at this time, I would of course assume this was all being given to me because I was the "chosen" one in the universe, and the aliens wanted to give me this information. Butttt.. that's not the point =)
I would have, what I now discovered as "obe"s .... I would find my self in a deep trance, with a very steady rythmic breathing..... I would feel vibrations in certain points of my bodys, and a hum that went along with it ..... It seemed like a deep state of meditation to me, I don't recall even "thinking" anything, and only being aware what was actually happening, after it happened. My body seemed to travel to the window and it wasn't very clear, my vison was a little blury but I could still make out where I was, and anytime I saw "light", my vison would blur a little more, and seem to ruin most of my vision from then on.
I have had similar experiances like this, when I was younger also.
This time was all very confusing, because I was infamous for my constant hallucenations, visually and auditory.
So if I mentioned any of this, it could of clearly been tossed into the "you're a fruit cake" salad..
I would hear voices constantly trying to tell me things....and see people I've never seen before, every day.. almost every moment of my life, before I was put on anti-psychoctics that seemed to stop it all, (somewhat)
I had the most obe's and psychic phenomena happen to me , during the points of my "illness".
I'm curious if there is any link what so ever. During therapy time with other schizophrenics, I met a lot of people who were "stable" and have told me they have always had very keen psychic abilities...., and I continued to search, and I've found many more people like that also. I also found many people seemed to have close reguard to god and "angels"..... what my point is, is most of the people that have had psychosis or an illness like it, have had a very strong closeness to what most people would call bizzare phenomena, and can easily do things like astrally project, or sense spirits.
This could all make sense, schizohohrenia, or even epilepsy has to go with organic abnormalces in the brain...... and that clearly has affect on the mind, so couldn't it also clearly have benefits that are over looked, or not even noticed? I think that most people suffering from the things I have gone through, have opened up some human ability, not many people can find, unless they try to.. and that tends to make the illness worse....
If you get someone who is telling their doctor, they see aliens, or people standing in their room at night, warning them of things, and then they tell the doctor they frequently "leave" the body and can roam around town, wouldn't it all get overlooked, as just apart of the illness ?
I don't know what my "real" problems were. Perhaps I'll never know. I meet the specifications for many mental disorders, and I'm being treated for schizophrenia, and epilepsy.... Although I'm 98% cured from my "schizophrenia" with medication - I still have the remaining werid things happen to me....... the psychic things..... and I have this werid ability to "take" peoples energy, with out meaning to. I looked this up, and and I suppose that is something to do with "psychic vampirism", which I know nothing about..., but every possible answer, that could be the answer for me, is directly linked with energy. As, of course, all life is here, because of energy.....
While on my journey to find peace with my self, find true happiness..... I just want to learn as much as I can about things I come across along the way, and right now , this is what I'm interested....
I also have a question.....
For about a year now, It seems I've been drained of all energy.... at least when I get it, It seems to leak somewhere, and I never get to use it, if that makes sense. I'm always tired, always unmotivated.... - but I have been jogging 1 - 2 miles every other day at the gym for the past 2 years to heal my asthma and heart conditions. This loss of energy is so unexpainible to me, as I go to the doctors up to 4 times a month, I'm always being tested for everything, at at the moment i'm NOT anemic.......so my energy loss can't be from that...
Does anyone have any tips, or something to help me with this ?
Someway to get more energy to help me through out the day.........
anything ideas would be appreciated...
I hope I didn't bring up too many subjects..... but I thought I'd get all my rambels out on one post.......hope to hear from someone......
love & bless
athanasy
England.......
I just joined this community, hopefully I'll learn even more things here. For the past month or so I've been interested in "OBE's", and I've been trying to learn as much about Astral Projection as possible. What led me to this, is kind of strange, well I guess not..... but the last year of my life (I'm 16) has been really difficult, hard, and confusing. I've been in Mental hospitals, diagnosed with everything from Bipolar disorder, Schizophrenia, Borderline Personality Disorder, Partial Epilepsy (partial seizures) - and the list goes on and on, and on. I've had bad health since a very young age, my anemia has been on and off, I have somewhat a weird heart (abnormal vessels, backwards tubes, etc..), and seizures after I eat food.... and, that list goes on and on too. What my point is, is ever since my long attack of "psychosis" , and since I've been somehwhat "in reality", I've been searching for some kind of answer. Something to make life less confusing, more calm, and less scary. Since I was little, my mum introduced me to many pagan religions, which were centered around "energy".. and inner strength.... and even though astral projection is far from a "religion" or isn't a "set of beliefs" - I find comfort and fascination in it.
When the doctors diagnosed me with psychosis, one of my constant "symptoms" I guess you could call it, involved many "psychic" encounters. While I was developing schizohphrenia or schizoaffective disorder, I became very sensitive to energys... I could feel spiritual presence.... and although it sounded very delusional at the time , "spirits" would give me messages, and from that I would gain knowlege of events yet to come and my inner self gained some kind of "psychic advantage".
Also , I recall, even in the mental hospitals, at night, I would go into this very relaxed state.. and my mind would become very aware of past and presence energies in the room where I was..and because I was delusional, at this time, I would of course assume this was all being given to me because I was the "chosen" one in the universe, and the aliens wanted to give me this information. Butttt.. that's not the point =)
I would have, what I now discovered as "obe"s .... I would find my self in a deep trance, with a very steady rythmic breathing..... I would feel vibrations in certain points of my bodys, and a hum that went along with it ..... It seemed like a deep state of meditation to me, I don't recall even "thinking" anything, and only being aware what was actually happening, after it happened. My body seemed to travel to the window and it wasn't very clear, my vison was a little blury but I could still make out where I was, and anytime I saw "light", my vison would blur a little more, and seem to ruin most of my vision from then on.
I have had similar experiances like this, when I was younger also.
This time was all very confusing, because I was infamous for my constant hallucenations, visually and auditory.
So if I mentioned any of this, it could of clearly been tossed into the "you're a fruit cake" salad..
I would hear voices constantly trying to tell me things....and see people I've never seen before, every day.. almost every moment of my life, before I was put on anti-psychoctics that seemed to stop it all, (somewhat)
I had the most obe's and psychic phenomena happen to me , during the points of my "illness".
I'm curious if there is any link what so ever. During therapy time with other schizophrenics, I met a lot of people who were "stable" and have told me they have always had very keen psychic abilities...., and I continued to search, and I've found many more people like that also. I also found many people seemed to have close reguard to god and "angels"..... what my point is, is most of the people that have had psychosis or an illness like it, have had a very strong closeness to what most people would call bizzare phenomena, and can easily do things like astrally project, or sense spirits.
This could all make sense, schizohohrenia, or even epilepsy has to go with organic abnormalces in the brain...... and that clearly has affect on the mind, so couldn't it also clearly have benefits that are over looked, or not even noticed? I think that most people suffering from the things I have gone through, have opened up some human ability, not many people can find, unless they try to.. and that tends to make the illness worse....
If you get someone who is telling their doctor, they see aliens, or people standing in their room at night, warning them of things, and then they tell the doctor they frequently "leave" the body and can roam around town, wouldn't it all get overlooked, as just apart of the illness ?
I don't know what my "real" problems were. Perhaps I'll never know. I meet the specifications for many mental disorders, and I'm being treated for schizophrenia, and epilepsy.... Although I'm 98% cured from my "schizophrenia" with medication - I still have the remaining werid things happen to me....... the psychic things..... and I have this werid ability to "take" peoples energy, with out meaning to. I looked this up, and and I suppose that is something to do with "psychic vampirism", which I know nothing about..., but every possible answer, that could be the answer for me, is directly linked with energy. As, of course, all life is here, because of energy.....
While on my journey to find peace with my self, find true happiness..... I just want to learn as much as I can about things I come across along the way, and right now , this is what I'm interested....
I also have a question.....
For about a year now, It seems I've been drained of all energy.... at least when I get it, It seems to leak somewhere, and I never get to use it, if that makes sense. I'm always tired, always unmotivated.... - but I have been jogging 1 - 2 miles every other day at the gym for the past 2 years to heal my asthma and heart conditions. This loss of energy is so unexpainible to me, as I go to the doctors up to 4 times a month, I'm always being tested for everything, at at the moment i'm NOT anemic.......so my energy loss can't be from that...
Does anyone have any tips, or something to help me with this ?
Someway to get more energy to help me through out the day.........
anything ideas would be appreciated...
I hope I didn't bring up too many subjects..... but I thought I'd get all my rambels out on one post.......hope to hear from someone......
love & bless
athanasy
England.......