Hello,
I am new to the concepts and ideals i see on this site, but in a way they seem to apply to my own personal experiences.
Some examples:
1. I have had two separate instances in which i have hated people enough to want them dead or create a plot to kill them. Over time each of these individuals was murdered but not by myself. I have also had a keen disliking of other individuals whom each had life threatening situations befall them shortly after.
2. As a child i had a number of disturbing and seemingly prophetic dreams. One in particular involved my grandmother having a hideous creature burst from the back of her neck. About two years later she passed away from an aneurysm(spelling?) in the part of her brain that connects to her spinal column.
3. As a child I was able to stare at flying insects and small birds, hoping they would land near me so I could catch them...and they would!
4. As an adult I would visit female friends and never initiate and sexual contact or activity, yet I would be extremely aroused and SOMEHOW pass this on to them...without saying anything or touching them....and somehow they always make the first move on me....acting out of character in most cases.
5. Once in high school a hated a female and wished death on her. Within one year her life spiraled downward. Her grades dropped to the point that she was held back a grade, she was kicked off of the varsity cheer leading squad, she had problems at home, and finally she contracted AIDS and committed suicide. Upon Finding out of her demise I was stricken with guilt until i dreamed that she visited me with her in and I apologized.
6. About five years ago I began experimenting with Astral Projection. One morning my brother(with whom i shared a room) told me that he had awakened in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, but was startled by what appeared to be a ghost standing over his bed. Upon hearing this I immediately stopped experimenting and have been scared to do so ever since.
7. Sometimes while walking or riding the bus I would begin to daydream....then suddenly I would "imagine" that i was every person I saw walking on the street. I would smell their house. Feel how their clothes felt on them. Be aware of any tension in their household IE and argument with a sibling or relative. And I could feel their mood IE: rushing to work, tired or exhausted, anxious to get home..ect..
8. I often sense other people in a room with me when i am alone. Also when i am in the process of falling asleep I will see people or "things" I know are not there and are not a part of my imagination....they will interrupt my current thought processes. Here is an example of my train of thought: "I wonder what I'm gonna wear to work tomorrow---'HELP ME PLEASE'"....the "help me please" not being in my thinking voice and being accompanied by an image of some person i have never seen in my life"
there are literally hundreds of other weird things that cause me to question my own sanity.
My question is: Are these Psychic/spiritual gifts and if so...can i get rid of them?
I ask because they have been nothing but a source of fear and confusion in my life. I was raised Christian and taught that such things were "demonic" or "satanic" and demons and the like. I have always been quiet and introspective because I've felt alienated by these things.
I have never told anyone because I've feared that they would thing I was some type of weirdo of "devil worshiper" or something. Also the fact that i don't necessarily believe in this stuff leads me to think i have slowly been falling deeper and deeper into insanity ever since i was a young boy!
Everyone here seem to know how to increase you "psychic" or "spiritual" potential, but is there a way to make it stop and go away forever?
Any and all suggestions will be appreciated and taken seriously?
thanks in advance.
I am new to the concepts and ideals i see on this site, but in a way they seem to apply to my own personal experiences.
Some examples:
1. I have had two separate instances in which i have hated people enough to want them dead or create a plot to kill them. Over time each of these individuals was murdered but not by myself. I have also had a keen disliking of other individuals whom each had life threatening situations befall them shortly after.
2. As a child i had a number of disturbing and seemingly prophetic dreams. One in particular involved my grandmother having a hideous creature burst from the back of her neck. About two years later she passed away from an aneurysm(spelling?) in the part of her brain that connects to her spinal column.
3. As a child I was able to stare at flying insects and small birds, hoping they would land near me so I could catch them...and they would!
4. As an adult I would visit female friends and never initiate and sexual contact or activity, yet I would be extremely aroused and SOMEHOW pass this on to them...without saying anything or touching them....and somehow they always make the first move on me....acting out of character in most cases.
5. Once in high school a hated a female and wished death on her. Within one year her life spiraled downward. Her grades dropped to the point that she was held back a grade, she was kicked off of the varsity cheer leading squad, she had problems at home, and finally she contracted AIDS and committed suicide. Upon Finding out of her demise I was stricken with guilt until i dreamed that she visited me with her in and I apologized.
6. About five years ago I began experimenting with Astral Projection. One morning my brother(with whom i shared a room) told me that he had awakened in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, but was startled by what appeared to be a ghost standing over his bed. Upon hearing this I immediately stopped experimenting and have been scared to do so ever since.
7. Sometimes while walking or riding the bus I would begin to daydream....then suddenly I would "imagine" that i was every person I saw walking on the street. I would smell their house. Feel how their clothes felt on them. Be aware of any tension in their household IE and argument with a sibling or relative. And I could feel their mood IE: rushing to work, tired or exhausted, anxious to get home..ect..
8. I often sense other people in a room with me when i am alone. Also when i am in the process of falling asleep I will see people or "things" I know are not there and are not a part of my imagination....they will interrupt my current thought processes. Here is an example of my train of thought: "I wonder what I'm gonna wear to work tomorrow---'HELP ME PLEASE'"....the "help me please" not being in my thinking voice and being accompanied by an image of some person i have never seen in my life"
there are literally hundreds of other weird things that cause me to question my own sanity.
My question is: Are these Psychic/spiritual gifts and if so...can i get rid of them?
I ask because they have been nothing but a source of fear and confusion in my life. I was raised Christian and taught that such things were "demonic" or "satanic" and demons and the like. I have always been quiet and introspective because I've felt alienated by these things.
I have never told anyone because I've feared that they would thing I was some type of weirdo of "devil worshiper" or something. Also the fact that i don't necessarily believe in this stuff leads me to think i have slowly been falling deeper and deeper into insanity ever since i was a young boy!
Everyone here seem to know how to increase you "psychic" or "spiritual" potential, but is there a way to make it stop and go away forever?
Any and all suggestions will be appreciated and taken seriously?
thanks in advance.