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I read somewhere (can't remember where; not even sure if I'm right but who cares, this is Astral Chat) that we're long overdue for the next gigantic astroid that comes down and wipes out almost everything and makes life start over again. But who knows, I could be wrong.

Lemme see...

http://cndyorks.gn.apc.org/yspace/articles/asteroid6.htm

Oops, sorry. It's only supposed to wipe out 10% of the population. []

Hate to sound my age, but I'd probably go DBZ. You know, shooting Kamehamehas and Destructo Disks and Special Beam Cannons and stuff. [] Assuming I could (and would want to) project.

No. It was the Summoning Charm from the fourth Harry Potter book. That's why it's funny. I'm surprised no one got it...

)Muchas gracias. As mentioned elsewhere, I appreciate it greatly.

Hmm. Post's too short. Acronym time!

BYORL - Bring Your Own Rocket Launcher
PEBKAC - Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair
PTLAPTA - Praise the Lord and Pass the Ammunition
EMPS - Excessive Multiple Posting Syndrome
TYCLO - Turn Your CAPS LOCK Off! ([])
YABSA - Yet Another Bloody Stupid Acronym

Sorry if "bloody" is a swear from...uh...where ever...[]

[TOP TEN WAYS TO FREAK OUT YOUR ROOMMATE]

Sorry these are so long but I couldn't resist...

TOP TEN WAYS TO FREAK OUT YOUR ROOMMATE

10. Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, "He just didn't belong."

9. Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.

8. Draw a tiny, black spot on your arm. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, "It's spreading, it's spreading!"

7. Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon... "

6. Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

5. Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

4. While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

3. Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich!?" Complain loudly that you are hungry.

2. Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes.

Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"

1.Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer!"

I was reading a DBZ fanfic posted by a person who called herself Panabelle. It had a nice ring to it and DBZ is why I came here in the first place (sort of) so I figured why not? (Later I found out that Pan is the named of Goku's grand-daughter[|)])

That's too bad...good thing I got into the game pretty early then.

I babysit two kids, ages 2 and 4. I don't want to cross their parents or anything, but just as a little test for myself is there anything I could do to see if they do this? You know, metaphysical stuff? I tried asking one if she saw my aura (not so plainly though) but she thought it was a game. Any ideas?

TOP 50 THINGA TO DO IN A FINAL EXAM THAT DOESN'T MATTER (as in you're failing anyway)

Sorry they aren't numbered, but it wouldn't copy and paste that way and I cannot be bother according to the prophecy.

Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say "oh geez, better get cracking" and do some gibberish work. Turn it in a few minutes early.
Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!"
If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be creative. Use the integral symbol.
Make paper airplanes out of the exam. Aim them at the instructor's left nostril.
Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.
Bring cheerleaders.
Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minutes into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?"
Bring a Game Boy (or Game Gear, etc...). Play with the volume at max level.
On the answer sheet (book, whatever) find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.
Bring pets.
Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.
Fifteen minutes into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every fifteen minutes.
Do the exam with crayons, paint, or fluorescent markers.
Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.
Come down with a BAD case of Tourette's Syndrome during the exam. Be as vulgar as possible.
Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up! For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals.
Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.
As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.
Walk into the exam with an entourage. Claim you are going to be taping your next video during the exam. Try to get the instructor to let them stay, be persuasive. Tell the instructor to expect a percentage of the profits if they are allowed to stay.
Every five minutes, stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam.
Turn in the exam approximately 30 minutes into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.
Do the entire exam as if it was multiple choice and true/false. If it is a multiple choice exam, spell out interesting things (DCCAB. BABE. etc..).
Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.
Get the exam. Twenty minutes into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out "The Heck with this!" and walk out triumphantly.
Arrange a protest before the exam starts (i.e. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink)
Show up completely drunk. (Completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy).
Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!"
Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day. Especially if they are the same sex.
Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 minutes, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away.
Go to an exam for a class you have never gone to, where you know the class is very small, and the instructor would recognize you if you belonged. Claim that you have been to every lecture. Fight for your right to take the exam.
Upon receiving the exam, look it over, while laughing loudly, say "you don't really expect me to waste my time on this drivel? Rikki Lake is on!!!"
Bring a water pistol with you. Nuff said.
From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.
Start a brawl in the middle of the exam.
If the exam is math/science related, make up the longest proofs you could possibly think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.
Come in wearing a full knight's outfit, complete with sword and shield.
Bring a friend to give you a back massage the entire way through the exam. Insist this person is needed, because you have bad circulation.
Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're getting kicked out!) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit."
When you walk in, complain about the heat. Strip.
After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.
One word: Wrestlemania.
Bring balloons, blow them up, start throwing them around like they do before concerts start.
Try to get people in the room to do the wave.
Play frisbee with a friend at the other side of the room.
Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.
Get deliveries of candy, flowers, balloons, telegrams, etc... sent to you every few minutes throughout the exam.
During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach.
Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards at a 90 degree angle.
Bring a musical instrument with you, play various tunes. If you are asked to stop, say "it helps me think." Bring a copy of the Student Handbook with you, challenging the instructor to find the section on musical instruments during finals. Don't forget to use the phrase "Told you so".
Answer the exam with the "Top Ten Reasons Why Professor xxx Sucks"

"I can certainly imagine myself taking part in this war thing but seriously a demon war that nearly wipes out the human race sounds pretty farfetched."

Well, I'm sure nuclear weapons and the idea that entire continents could be blown up with the push of a button was farfetched a hundred years ago.

About katana - That's weird...My dad went to Japan with my mom before I was born and brought back a samurai-type looking sword. My mom's friend made her a really basic one in college. We keep them both in the front closet, and my little brother and I used to oooh and aaahh over them when we were little. I recently opened the closet door, intending to see if my dad's sword had a "soul" and there was a black katana that I don't ever recall seeing. Peculiar. Or maybe I'm just forgetful...anyway, I see what you guys mean about the rightness of it.

I do! "Accio!" []

But does an adrenal rush explain exploding glasses? I've screamed pretty darn loud in my house before without breaking anything.

Sounds like fun. I know what you mean about anger provoking energy surges. Believe it or not, I was in computer class and the stupid Mac wouldn't work and the assignment was due the next day AND the person next to me was completely computer illiterate and repeatedly asked me questions like "How do I turn it on"...it all built up. I'm at the point where I think about my energy just about every second, so while the computer was rebooting I subconsciously starting to gather energy. I felt the same "power surge" you seem to have felt. Luckily I came to my senses and it didn't leave my body.

You sound like a sensible kid who might be able to filter out fact from fiction, unlike some of these other wacked-out DBZers. Look around and find some reliable techniques to practice. Good Luck!!![]

You know, it's kind of ironic that when FT posted "Not AGAIN" there weren't really any bad posts. But as soon as we all agree to lay off, the DBZers come in swarms...[|)]

I'm dumb; I had to look up what IMAO meant. Hee hee...there's some other really funny ones here...

IITYWIMIWHTKY - If I Tell You What It Means, I Will Have To Kill You
SHID - Slaps Head In Disgust
LSHMCIS - Laughing So Hard My Computer Is Shaking
HILIACACLO - Help I Lapsed Into A Coma And Can't Log Off

Sorry, couldn't let a post be entirely meaningful...[]

Thanks! 'Preciate it greatly.

Fat Turkey (and everyone else too), I'm impressed. When I first came here, a post like FT's original would be followed by a passionate raving about how DBZ sucks and everyone who likes it should not be allowed to use the Internet. [] I think this thread was very profitable and mature.

(Watch ssjoku post with something in all Caps next. [|)][])

Ay...

Read "Not AGAIN" and see why this might not have been a timely post.

"It is almost like an unofficial 13 year olds stick together policy. protect the dbz'er at all cost or something, despite someone might be saying something right..."

Betcha didn't know I'm 13. Squeek is only a few years ahead. And (here's the kicker) Fat Turkey too. I admit there are a lot of young, misinformed minds, but not all young minds are misinformed. Kinda like that a-square-is-a-rectangle-but-a-rectangle-is-not-a-square thing. Let's not prejudice based on age; it's the one thing that annoys me.

It's ok, I feel your pain.[] But if you're getting annoyed at being asked the same question a zillion times, then stop answering. [|)] "If you don't have something nice to say don't say anythign at all."

THAT was funny. Seeing "I don't have a low IQ" and "I just want to know how to teleport" in the same sentence after at least four or five sarcastic posts...If you really are serious, you might want to take it somewhere else; you don't seem to be getting a lot of help here. Here's an article on phasing, but that's all I can do.

http://www.psipog.net/show.php?id=11

Ok, I found the post I missed. [|)] That's what I've been doing too, FT. (The fact that bathing suit season is fast approaching has nothing to do with the muscles part...[])

Like you said in the Tell Everyone post, Squeek: Why do I need to impress people?

Terry B. - I feel a sick sort of satisfaction that I have fooled the stupid machine into thinking my post was a contribution. SInce I can never win TicTacToe against it. It should read like this:

New Reply Posted!
ERROR ERROR ERROR
Idiocy detected

And then give your computer a hideous virus that won't go away unless you type "All my posts will have a point" 1000 times.

MWAH-HAH-HAH-HA-HAAAAAAAAAA!!!

(six, now)

Assuming by training you mean practice, then yes, of course.

Just curious, but where did this 2012 thing come from? I mean, I've heard that *something* is coming in the future, but not specifically demons in 2012. I must have missed an important post somewhere...

This is almost funnier than the other one! No wait, it is!!! [][][]

Anyway: Uh...isn't the site differ recommended auraseer's somewhat...contreversial...site?

Sorry Cyro, but you kinda asked for it. [|)] Caps Lock...hee hee...

If you really do want some levitation stuff for your magic trick, go here: http://www.geocities.com/Broadway/Stage/7308/balducci.html

Squeek: HAHAHA! That was hilarious. Did he really say "ur not a very good psychologist"? That's rich...[] And meaningful too!

I completely agree with what Kakkarot said. If everyone just left everyone else's beliefs alone and kept all the "that's crap" remarks to themselves (no offense meant, FT [|)] I see what you're saying) then everyone would be all happy and...stuff. Lost my train of thought. Oh well. Close enough.

[little]

"ok but would it work?" Good question. Let's answer it: has anyone actually done this before? How long did it take you to learn? Is it difficult? How far did you teleport? How fast were you going? Was it in open air or through stuff? And (duh) how did you do it? Seem like simple questions to me if you can do it. If you can answer these, I'm sure there's a lot of people (myself included[|)]) who'd appreciate it.  

Squeek: "Why" Heehee, that's funny. Must have slapped yourself after reading no_leaf_clover's answer...why...<chuckle> Still, motives is something to take into consideration.

SpiritPathwalker: Jumping off a cliff?! Isn't that just a little bit risky?

Well, I still don't think it's much of a problem. I guess I just count my blessings: I did a search for this as a joke, and never in a million years would have expected to find places like this. Who cares if I need to filter it? Better too much than too little.

Squeek - Holy spoons! I have over 300 posts!

[that]

Goku: 2extremee described how to do a ki flame. And welcome to the forums! [|)]

Bagel_God: Sorry if I'm making a fool of myself with the little knowledge I have, but didn't Einstein PROVE that all anything is is energy? That's probably wrong, but I figured I'd mention it anyway. (Also: someone asked my science teacher a while back what energy is [we were studying atoms] and she couldn't answer their question. Hmmm...maybe that's because...nobody knows?)

Soden: I'll go out on a limb again - have you tried EVERYTHING? Music? NEW? Umm...whatever else is supposed to help energy? There's a lot of advice here geared towards people like you.

Master of puppets: That was quite possibly the most pointless post I've ever read (vulgar too). Competing with ssjoku's one about Bush. Although that at least produced an entertaining discussion.[]