Messages

I don't know if this forum is the right place to post this but... if it's not then PLEASE someone advice some place where i could get better help.

To avoid a very long story let's just say that one of my very big traumas/phobias is getting yelled/scolded at, since i feel strong shame (i get all red), anxiety, anger sometimes, and depeding on the person i even get panic attacks and start shaking. Just forget about trying to get professional help, unfortunately it's useless not only because i have a full time job now (and unfortunately it's my own once that is my boss and it's completly impossible trying to find another job in my specific situation) but also all doctors i tried to get treated on (shrinks and psychiatrits) would mostly prescrive drugs with some undesired side effects, so unfortunately the kind of help i need isn't available in the place i live. By the way according to what i read online, i have almost all the symptons of asperger and even dyslexia...

The problem is that this trauma, ever since i started having this job, gets triggered tons of times each day by my boss/oncle and also my father, and it's DEFINETLY slowly increasing, lately i even have full blown panic attacks and start shaking and things like that and no matter what i say to him or to any other members of my family it's no use they don't understand me, infact they don't even believe i have a trauma of such a thing like this (about getting reprimended/scolded/humiliated/yelled at), therefore i keep doing douzens of mistakes at my job because i am all the time so afraid of my boss getting angry, and this is never ending, i almost feel like going crazy many times or even considering suicide (but of course i try as soon as possible to get that idea of my head immediatly) so you see i am really getting desperate and absolutly no one is able to help me or even FULLY understand me!

Also after doing some googling i read somewhere that one of the ways to fix a trauma is by doing intentional "exposure" and actually not trying to avoid the thing i fear the most, also i frequently hear people saying "to face your fears"... So for obvious reasons i can't confront my boss/oncle directly BUT i noticed i feel exactly the same feelings (altough not as strongly as with my oncle) by watching people arguing on tv, even if it's fully fictional, i can't stop feeling just like if i was the person being yelled at, so i guess that maybe it would be a good idea to do intencional exposure like this, BUT of course now applying presence exercices so that i avoid getting so affected emotionally. Anyway this is the only way i see to fix this without any professional help, because there is no other way...

Is there anyone here that got rid of a VERY STRONG trauma like this, or is this a bad idea? 

Also i suspect all this suffering and negative emotions are typical reactions of the ego because of the almost permanent bullying and yelling i get, so a way to get control of the ego would probably be a solution for this, but i don't know, this is the strongest trauma/phobia i have and it keeps being triggered douzens of times now in a daily basis, it doesn't seem that presence exercices or positive thinking is enought for such strong emotional and physical reactions, even tough i AM already able to at least not get affected so much anymore after i am outside of my job environment and i am at home, but the constant panic and fear of doing something wrong is always there no matter how present i am.

Thanks for the advice, altough i am unable to find any member with that name... can you show me the profile link the forum? Unless you mistyped it...

By the way are you sure that Khris Krepcik only treats the sympthoms ? It doesn't sound much like that from what i read on his page and in stuart wilde's blog...

Yeah that's definetly true, indeed i am trusting him, specially because of being a collegue of Stuart Wilde and i even read some books by Stuart Wilde, so i trust these guys, the only problem now is the requirements, because they say that the money sent is NOT refundable and i don't want to risk paying the money and after all i can't follow certain requirements to the healing make full work. So i hope they (i mean, the collegue) reply my email.

Yeah that's exactly the same reasons i am  prefering this healing over others on the internet, i trust this guy more than the others i never heared off, just because of stuart wilde as well, the problem is that there isn't enought info about what kind of preparations we have to do for such a healing, and there ISN'T any contact on Khris Krepcik's page, i choosed to sent a email to one of his colleges that i found in stuart wilde's blog and i hope the email gets answered, because i definetly have urgent problems to solve, and i already tried all "normal" professional help (shrinks, and even a hypnoterapist), also i need something drastic, since i also tried reiki, but i need something WAYY stronger than that, something able to deal about removing negative entities for good and even puttting protection to keep them from getting back, and this healins seems the perfect one for this, i am just afraid i pay the required 200 usd for this and afterwards i am unable to follow up with some requirements...

I am talking about this healing in this site :
http://www.thehoodedsage.com/healing/remote-healing/

It's not a question of doubting if he is legit or not, it seems a real legit healer as far as i know, the problem is that there is no way of knowing what kind of requirements they talk about when we have to prepare for the healing, because my current situation and schedule is quite complicated (because of my boss in the job i have) and also there is some kind of things that they might ask to do before the healing that i am unable to do.

I would like some feedback of what are the kind of preparations that they talk about when preparing for healings like this, i really hope i am able to find someone here that already took healings like this, or a way to contact someone close to khris krepcik or a collegue of his.

I know that this might belong in the healings discussion but there hasn't been any posts in several months, it seems dead to me, i doubt anyone besides the moderators will read this if i would post this there... Anyway if it's absolutly necessary then move the topic to there.

Oh i see... now i understand why it was so confusing to me... it was actually a explanation of what it is... lol ok ok take your time it's no hurry

I have an 'early beat', a problem not as dramatic as yours, and I practice projection.  I believe I already talked about it in another post (with you even) but like Horacio, I'd tell you not to postpone the surgery.  If it were me I would try phasing instead of RTZ OBE, because of the involvement of the heart chakra in the projection reflex.  But that's just my opinion.

Can you recommend me some good article on phasing ? I mean i know i can just search but it's just there is so many different ones, and some of them are a bit confusing to me (like that one i indicated you in the other post) so i would prefer one that you see that is more exactly what you mean in my specific situation.

By the way, several months ago before i knew i had this problem, i already tried to astral project/oobe many times... but i usually wasn't ever successful, even tough i think i started to feel some vibrations in the front part of the upper part of my left leg but it was just a bit and i was never able to reproduce that anymore, and also sometimes i would kinda feel a kind of "shock" in the center of my chest, but it had absolutly no other sideeffect, no accelerated heart beating, so i think it was really just something energy related and not related to WPW.

ok anyway still thanks for the explanations

Hum... i see, i just wanted to know if it has really significance to help developing clairvoyance or not that's all But so it seems it really does, at least i hope it does in my case

Hum... i think it's better that we talk in private message since as you can imagine it's a bit private stuff

Anyways of course i didn't REALLY mean to postpone the surgery, what i wanted most was to know what side effects such surgery can have regarding energy work, that's all anyways we will talk better by pm.

Because you are entering the trance state and hypnagogics are normal in trance.  Most people want to get them because it helps in developing clairvoyance.

Well, yeah i indeed always had a strong desire to develop clairvoyance, if what you say is really true then as you can imagine this is a major boost to my motivation to keep practising this By the way i most say that i also got sounds as well, i also can actually hear voices (and yes i notice very well the difference between those and actual physical voices) sometimes, and also, very rarely actually feel like i am feeling 3d objects inside my mind, it's kinda difficult to explain, but it's been several months since that last happened unfortunately.

Clearing your mind is one of the objects of meditation, but the experience of nothingness is not the only object- clear focus is the tool you use.  The idea that hypnagogic imagery means nothing in terms of development is incorrect- it is an indication that you are being able to consciously witness what usually happens when you're unconscious, and practicing it on purpose is a tool to fine-tune your clairvoyance, because this is the way clairvoyance works.  And if it happens so much you may also be remote viewing, which is a good thing.  It shows some natural talent.

But wait a minute! It was precisely because a reply you posted to me in the past that i got the idea of hypnagogic meaning nothing in terms of development... check it out :
http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_psychic_and_paranormal/how_to_distinguish_betwen_psychic_ability_progress_and_hypnagogicfalling_asleep-t30329.0.html;msg245985#msg245985

But now that i re-read it i might have misunderstood it at the time... isn't it ? At least when you talked "Most of what you see goes directly into your subconscious, without notice, and sometimes the things you don't think you've seen may have been seen and then forgot" this is specially what made me think that this wasn't development at all since i was just seeing stuff that i previouly seen with my physical eyes... Altough your reply this time was a more elucidative this time

Anyway i think that for my current level of development the best thing to do to develop clairvoyance is doing phasing, as you say ? You mean this : http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_the_astral_faq/what_is_phasing_and_how_can_i_do_it-t17413.0.html

Even tough that part of the 180 degrees is a bit confusing to me, unless that in the case of hypnagogic it's another method, if you know some simple and resumed technique tell me, if not then i will just read that one above better.


update : i have just read in "our ultimate reality" that the hypnagogic imagery is infact visions from the astral world and that they are a clear indication that we are very close to do a astral projection... the way he described the things, it's clearly the same i have, what you think of this? I ask this because this is incredibly confusing, everyone has a different oppinion about this i don't know in who to believe anymore...

Well i discovered recently that i have this problem in my heart since birth : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wpw or more exactly THIS is causing the problem : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bundle_of_Kent

I suppose this is COMPLETLY impossible to heal even by experience healers, right ? Well it might me common sense that the physical treatment they use in the hospital is the best way to fix this but i am not really sure about this... i dont' know why but if i was born with this, it have to mean something in terms of karma i presume i don't know if doing this is really the best idea but unfortunately i will be forcing to do it, since i already got my heart beating at 180 twice (arrhythmias) and i could have died.

Does anyone here has this syndrome or already got it fixed in the hospital by ablatation, know if there is any kind of energy work or psychic training exercice that would be dangerous to practise for people having this like me ? I ask this because specially when trying to astral project, the heart chakra is quite envolved in this, and since this stuff is about electrical circuits in the heart, i am not sure what kind of side effects could this have, either before or after the physical ablatation of the extra pathway in the heart, or even if doing energy work would probably RESTORE the ablated extra pathway (highly unlikely i think but maybe it could happend) which of course would be a bad thing.

I don't think any of those things are inherently bad in themselves, it's your association to them. And you seem to recognize that these things take too much of your attention. You don't have to drop any of them, but how you associate to them.

Well... i mostly reacted like that because of those articles about the ghouls and entities "feeding" of negative emotions, usually i use to trust what it's said on that blog, it doesn't seem to be false information to me, because before knowing that, i didn't had much problem liking what i like, by the contrary i DO like these hobbies i have but without attracting such entities, i am afraid of that already being happening all the time without me knowing that... do you think that such thing really happens or is just when we get obssessive about those things?

Do they dictate your actions or do you choose?

Well.. let's say it happens both things, sometimes it's one others is the other thing. By the way yes i am obssessive about some of those things but recently i am trying to be aware and i think i am at least avoid suffering, since about some of the things i use to suffer when not having. Maybe that thing of the entities only happens if we are obssessive about these things?

First thing I would do is start reading at a time when you would normally be watching TV or playing a game. Spend 45 minutes or an hour a day reading. Sometimes this alone can spark something new, like a change in daily thinking.

Wow it's almost as i guessed, because that's exactly the first thing i started to do after i read those articles, i mean, most of the times i used to watch a specific tvshow and which i was indeed having a kinda obssessive behavior (wrestling shows) now i COMPLETLY replaced that by reading ebooks from self help, you know, ebooks similar to these like "our ultimate destiny", "a new earth", etc and at least so far i have been able to handle it. But it's not the first time i do this, last time i tried this, i haven't started to read anything at all but watched other type of tvshows instead and about 2-3 weeks after i couldn't stand anymore the "obssession" spoke louder... let's hope this time it works better.

Meditation is another one you can do for just a few minutes a day that can make big impacts.

Hum... yes indeed... by the way why i often get hypnagogic imagery during meditation ? (it's always completly random stuff never related to what i was thinking before it happens) I mean sometimes i want to meditate and clear my mind but with this it's difficult and since hypnagogic imagery means nothing in terms of development i don't want having it hindering the training of having a clear mind. Unless this is normal to happen in meditation ?

Instead of feeling like you need a break from modern media, use it as a break from the new things in your life. Those things will be more enjoyable like that and you won't feel like your consumed by them - you've created a new association to them. You might not even enjoy them anymore and move onto other things.

Hum... i see thanks.

What you mean?

I mean, after i read this :

http://www.stuartwildeblog.com/sws-jottings/2009/12/20/protection-from-entities.html

and

this :

http://www.stuartwildeblog.com/richard-tyler/2009/4/9/television-and-the-deadly-black-dust.html

I would ask to the experienced persons here that understand about these things, in which is the first step to start to get rid of all that "negativity" that we get by those means its said in there.

I am asking this because for many years my main hobbies are almost ALL related to violence somehow (video games, anime, tvshows and EVEN fetishes) but in "real" life i am a good person and care about others, altough i always had the problem with anger managment and getting offended real easy and get angry real easy even tough i have been working on that lately by being "aware" and i am starting slowly to control my anger but it seems something is hindering the process, it can only be all this violent stuff i enjoy. But what caused me to try to do this was specialy because i can't stand anymore the suffering i have from getting yelled constantly by other people and being really clumsly, short attention span and slow doing most things, etc because in the specific case of my boss it's completly useless to yell back at him, and ignoring him, well that's a LOT easier said than done, because i instantly get a "heat rise" inside of me, my face gets all red and i instantly feel a huge knot in my stomach and i get pulsating all over me, and this happens naturally even if i try to ignore.

Now that i want to start getting rid of those attachments and entities... what would be the first thing to do ? Maybe just meditation ? Anyways, i already tried a few times to completly stop watching all violent stuff on tv and stopping feeding the sexual desire but as it's obvious it didn't last long, as you can imagine for a person that did enjoyed these things for years, no matter how much "awareness" exercices i do to try to avoid the ego desires i still experience suffering (a lot more than when feeding the desires), and of course help from a professional healer to remove attachments and entities is out of the question since i can't afford one and specially in the place i live.

I really hope someone here has experience on these things because i am kinda lost here, because without all these hobbies, you know what i would be doing? Staring at walls all day... lool Yes because about tv, well it's almost IMPOSSIBLE to find a single tv show without any violence at all, it's just impossible unless i watch babytv or teletubbies (loool) and about video games... almost the same thing i would have to do drastic changes in my lifestyle and tastes to completly avoid violence stuff at all, is this really REALLy that bad as it says in those articles?? Because if is i think i will need serious help...

Hi,
I am pretty sure I know EXACTLY what you are talking about. Is it the same as when you get goosebumps from something really emotionally stimulating? I have always felt these chills when I listen to really good music, even more so when I hear a really good singer. I even feel them at good parts in movies or maybe when my team scores the winning point and such. Does it start at the base of your skull and travel down throughout your body? It is a really nice feeling, I agree. The thing is, I can now intentionally reproduce the "waves" "chills" or whatever you want to call them and have found that the more I practice with them the easier and more intense they can get. I'm not sure exactly how to describe how I can make them happen, but it is kind of like I take a breath in and sort of 'flex' the back of head/base of skull. I've always had an inkling it was some sort of healing energy, but I really don't know what the heck it is...

Hum... yeah i think it's the same thing, yes. But in my case it used to start at the middle of my back and RISING upwards and reaching my scalp. But lately i noticed it now happens only in my neck and scalp, quite strange... Anyways that part of producing the wavs or chills is very interestig i still don't know how exactly you cause this to happen i never was able to do such a thing even when i just tryed your method.

ok thanks i will check them out

(welll i understand english a lot better than spanish believe me, since my native language is portuguese, i know it's similar to spanish but still i have trouble understading spanish)

oh i see... that means the idea i had about trance is COMPLETLY wrong, i have no idea what is like to be in trance or "you should do trance mental exercises to achieve a trance." then ... lol i have to check MAP then, even tough a quick description would be better rather than searching the complete book I ask this because some of the trance meditation techniques i found on the net, the way i interpreted i tought it was like i said, that means they are wrong, hence why i need this clarification.

Then don't do it more than 5 minutes.  If you're not sure it's doing anything, and absolutely need the feedback to feel motivated, get into trance first and then do it, but not a lot for a long time.

Just to clear things up, getting into trance, is just staying completly still without moving any part of the body for some time ?

About the work as it is presented- you don't have to do all that laborious stuff every time- you do 'every single inch' at first because it activates the whole shebang and it teaches you how to do it.  But once you've done it a few times (like a week) general sponging/brushing should be enough, and if you still don't want to do any of it, do sponging on your arms and legs and a full body circuit- this even covers the chakras.

wait a minute... that means i interpreted incorrectly what robert bruce said, see this is why i make this posts i, for example i tough he meant that the labourious work was for activating those nonresponsible areas, but if you say it's just to learn how to do the awareness actions better then how could i knew this, thanks for the clarification, the problem here is that usually i interpret things differently, probably also because my native language isn't english.

The whole point of NEW is not to bore you or to make you become 'energy superhero' with all that work- it is to teach you body awareness and to get a feel for when there is a problem.  So if you already have identified a problem (one side more reactive than the other) you can do something to feel more balanced, even if using other things, like adding an element to the 'nonresponsive' side, or just doing it for about as long as the other side, and get done with it and on with your life.

Well, i think it says in the manual that the point of new is to make the body respond better and have better energy flow?

thanks for the help by the way

hmm... maybe next time you try the N.E.W. energy exercises, try practicing them on the less responsive side first?

Well that's obvious, altough i always do in both sides, like it says in the n.e.w. manual.

Also, sometimes your chakras respond better to one type of exercise than another. For example, the chakras on my body seem to respond faster to the 'Stirring Motion' than to the 'Brushing Motion'. So, either practice on the less responsive side first next time OR just move on to the next exercise as Bruce himself suggests.

Hum... very interesting i haven't tought about that... i can try that...

Also keep in mind the variety of sensations you get as you raise your energy body levels through his energy exercise, which include pressure, warmth, cold, heaviness, tingling, or buzzing. Perhaps you may have gotten one of these on your less responsive side and just don't quite notice it?

Yeah i notice this mostly at the joints, but in the middle of the forearm and between the elbow and shoulder for example i feel absolutly nothing, it's just like i am not doing any energy work at all, which is very frustating.

If you feel something on your less responsive side that's like one of sensations I listed, I'd suggest you focus your self on that feeling as perhaps it could be one of those aforementioned sensations. That's what I did when I thought one of my energy center wasn't responding, though then I realized that it was occuring, but just took a while to develop. That may also just be your case as well?

Hum... how much time (days) it took you to notice changes ? Several months ago i did like this :

During 15 days i did the full arm and full leg work, and i mean ALL the exercices in the legs and arms, each time i did it it took about 1 hour and half to finish all exercices in both arms or in both legs. I usually did the complete arm work in one day, then the complete leg work in the next day, and so on, because it was really a LOT of effort and i always had a lot of needing to hyperventilate after doing this... After i did this daily about 15 days but then i had to quit, because even at that time this was already somekind of torture and i did this until i could stand, and after all those days i was begging all the time to stop this And after about 15 days i couldn't stand anymore and i quit, and of course the lack of any changes in the sensations i got made things even worse, if i had felt better energy movement and feeelings maybe i was more motivated to go on, but it just felt like it was doing absolutly nothing since in my entire limbs the energy sensations i got were exactly the same as they were before i started those 15 days of daily new...

Is it normal that it takes a lot more time than 15 days to notice any change in the energy sensations ? Or this proves that i did something wrong ?

well... my problem is not exactly lack of motivation about the astral projection and other psychic abilities, because i really have a HUGE motivation for psychic abilities, the problem is that i am not so sure if n.e.w. is REALLY going to help a lot on that because nothing else worked so far and even tough you get tingling, in my right side of the body in most surfaces of my legs and arms i fell nothing that's why it's so difficult to me for staying doing this for more than 2-3 minutes! Of course that when i get tinging and i actually feel the awareness actions itselfs i am a lot more motivated, but i can't just work on the left side of my body because of this.

You certainly won't get very far if your brain constantly urges you to go do something "fun". It is the curse upon our society thanks to the push of movies and video games etc.

Tame your mind, like you would tame a chained hungry hellhound.

The feeling of boredom is but an illusion imposed by the mind that you can get rid of.


I get a lot of tingling sensations in my feet and lower legs, my energy body seems to be strong there, but I feel little, almost nothing on my back where I've had pain and emotional tension built up.

Yes i know about that BUT remember, this problem doesn't happen much on the left side of my body, where i get good feelings when doing n.e.w. I am not too sure if it's just "The feeling of boredom is but an illusion imposed by the mind that you can get rid of." or if it's just my mind being EXTREMELY "afraid" of wasting time on this and not doing any energy work at all, because not feeling anything on the right limbs, that's the problem... (note that of course my right limbs aren't completly dead there is specific spots that do respond a bit to energy work, i just mean in the whole limbs as general) Unless when we do energy work in limbs and feeling absolutly nothing, it IS always doing some kind of energy work at all ? Or is it possible that i am doing it wrong? Because everytime i do energy work in parts i feel absolutly nothing, i find myself trying a bit too hard and i happen to tense my head muscles physically without noticing, even tough i know this should be all mental.

I try to do about 60-90 min of full body circuit per day in order to raise my energy for healing and astral projection.

Oh you mean, that is the total sum of several sessions of 5-10 min like you say, during the day ?

Anyways maybe it's a good idea doing several small sessions of energy work during the day, instead of a half hour and half of doing the complete energy work in my arms or legs ? I noticed that the very few times i was able to do ALL n.e.w. complete energy work sections for my arms OR legs, i noticed that i was kinda tired (i needed to hyperventilate a few times) and of course it was almost like i was doing something forced/tortured, i don't know if it's such a good idea doing all those exercices in a single session, maybe it's better split each part of the session during the day ? For example, i do 5 minutes of hands energy work, then later i do 5 minutes of arm joints energy work, etc etc. I already found out that doing n.e.w. very briefly (5 minutes maximum) it is a lot less "torture", but i remember people in the past advising me to do this in a single session instead of several small ones... does this really have a difference when it's about developing the energy body ?

I mean, i noticed that i actually like doing n.e.w. or any energy work at all, if i am able to actually feel something on the places i am working. And i notice this happens mostly in my left side of the body, in all parts of the right side of my body is very very hard to actually get any feeling at all when doing any energy work at all and this makes the practise of energy work VERY frustating because it's always like i am doing nothing at all, since i feel absolutly nothing... i mean how can i know if it really actually doing something or not to help to develop the energy pathways if i feel absolutly nothing? Because like this, energy work here is almost like "torture" and i can't stand doing it longer than 5 minutes at all...

What you guys recommend, let's suppose i do a general brushing action along the entire right leg and right arm, instead of doing all the labourous energy work that is said on n.e.w. which is INCREDIBLY boring and almost like torture if done when feeling nothing at all because it always gives me the impression that like this i am doing nothing at all.

If i do that general brushing action like that, for only a few minutes, several times a day, would it have the same effect than doing the complete work in every joints (which usually lasts about 1 hour and half in my case in the VERY few times i had enought patience to reach the end) daily ? I really hope there is such shortcut... anyone had experience with this already?

Hum i see what you mean, but then what you think i should do to make ESP stuff coming in the hypnagogic stage ? I mean there's gotta something we do in this state to avoid falling asleep and getting ESP stuff in here... is it just a matter of practising and keep trying ?

Also several months ago i also did a different experiment, i was hearing voices in this stage and then i actually tried to make that voice say what i wanted, i mean, i visualized ("audialized"    loool) the voice speaking speciafic words and sentences that i wanted and it actually worked! Now of course it was a voice that i already heared before but the things i "heared" it say i never heared before.. (it was a voice from a tv show dub so you see my point) and i was hearing it just like a normal physical sound, only that i am always able to notice that it's "in my head". I also tried a similar experiment with images and it also worked. But unfortunately this was quite hard to do and i never was able to achieve this again, even tough i haven't tried that hard (or that often), lol

I would guess that hypnogogics themselves are normal and non-psychic.

Yes that's what i already "feared" i just would like to know how do we distinguish them from visual psychic impressions that psychics get, unless it's not possible to get images with clairvoyance like these we get in the hypnagogic stage?

The act of maintaining awareness through them can help strengthen our awareness for other modes of perception. It's more about how and where we choose to focus our awareness. You can use the hypnogogics as a springboard into other states of consciousness.

In other words, awareness is the key, not the hypnogogics.

Speaking of that, i did a VERY interesting experience last night when i was trying to sleep, please give me your opinion about the results

When i was trying to sleep (my bedroom wasn't completly dark, there's always some very mild lightning every night) that night was one of those in which i started getting into the hypnagogic stage. It was both images and sounds (voices), so i remembered to try again something i tried a few times and i wasn't sucessfull : i tryed to keep those hypnagogic images and sounds with my eyes OPEN. Needless to say, even if i open my eyes very slowly, as soon as they are open, the sounds immediatly ceased (the images already ceased since the first try and didn't came back during these attempts, only the sounds). Then when i closed my eyes they came back in a few seconds, and so on. BUT after the 4th or 5th try they started to happen also with my eyes opened (not for long of course) which was a big surprise to me this never happened before, but this time i started hearing also other very strange sounds, which i usually read that people hear when trying to astral project, for example, the sound of a cardboard being teared hard (it's hard to explain this in english since it's not my native language) and those are quite loud, i also heared a sound similiar to a ballon when it's popped. Also these sounds aren't new to me i already got a few of them sometimes during hypnagogics but never with eyes opened. I got about 2-3 of these when i had my eyes open, but besides that nothing more happened. Then i decided to roll over in my bed (which i always use to do) to go to sleep for real, and strangely i felt a little bit dizzy, this also never happened before just because of trying these things... (also my heart beating was normal, i could notice it since my upper body was a pulsating a bit harder than usual, but this uses to happen when i try hypnagogic while sit too). Also my body, even before the roll wasn't completly stopped, i was just relaxed, but i wasn't having any vibrations or paralysis at all and also no energy sensations at all. But it was really weird hearing those sounds for the first time with my eyes opened (and yes i was seeing part of my room, as i said it wasn't totally dark). Let's see if i am able to recreate this more times since seems to be interesting (at least i hope there isn't anything dangerous about this, right ?)