Messages

Is it day or night?

Maybe when you are astral, it is easier to see astral people than physical people. Maybe people don't stay indoors when they project.

Do you ever see them flying?

the people I see when I see folks in my LDs are mostly vacant. I don't know what they are. I try to talk to them without much luck.

Patty

Hi Andrew,

I don't get that feeling much. I get something similar, more like I'm doing my daily work but that I'm not really home, or that I am sort of displaced. I am wondering if the person looking over your shoulder is YOU?  Maybe you split off a part of yourself because taking out the garbage is so boring and you wanted to get out. At least that would explain why you were comfortable with the presence. I DO often feel like my 'soul' is a pairing of a couple different previous incarnations of people who were wildly different. (No, I don't have MPD!)  So sometimes I feel like there is more than one 'me' inside.  Some of the 'me's' are my childhood 'me's' and some are the 'me's' that I never got to be (like the actress I always wanted to be-- heh heh). It's crowded.

One thing you can try next time is to start a conversation with the presence.  I think there are some good guidelines on Bruce Moen's site (afterlife-knowledge.com) --- basically finding a quiet spot and starting an imaginary conversation - after a while you might hear a surprising response that didn't come from your own mind.

Or else there are bored ghosts walking around. You never know. Infinity is pretty long, even garbage starts to look interesting.

Patty

Thank you for the response, Frank.

Sounds like emotions are a double edged sword. I wouldn't be projecting at all if I wasn't emotionally invested in the pursuit, but then that driving force (emotion) may be what causes the projection to have illusory elements.  

hmmmm.... I'll need to think on this one, explore how emotions may be playing into my experiences. I don't feel particularly emotional during the attempt, but I understand that subtle thoughts can manifest wildly.  

In C1 I generally allow my emotions to be fully experienced and appropriately expressed, it seems necessary and healthy. So I assume that when I work through the ideas of emotions coloring OB travels I will still want them to be acknowledged or expressed (as that is a value I hold) ----- maybe ultimately what appeals to me is allowing emotional expression while non-physical, but learning to see what elements in the experience are a result of the emotion. (Hmmm... this could take a while....)

On the physical plane this sort of approach works for me.... it is fairly easy for me to recognize what aspects of my thoughts and actions are emotional and what parts are rational (though how I got here I wouldn't wish on anybody) - part of expansion of consciousness that all people presumably go through in their lives. I see many people living more reactively and I presume that they aren't aware of all the factors within themselves that are affecting their behavior and experiences.  I can appreciate that it might be far more challenging to identify various causes for events on the nonphysical level, in no small part due to having only short 'windows' of time to examine the situation, and due to the much greater fluidity of the environment.

Bottom line from your response, my initial thoughts here, and Bruce's book - is that in any case learning the ropes requires time and experience.  I will spend some definite time and energy thinking about the emotional aspects of projection.

THANKS!

Patty

p.s. Tia -

Thanks for mentioning the book - I pulled it off the shelf and saw some really good writing about what can influence perceived reality during projection.  I guess if RB has (or had) this problem, then it doesn't bother me quite as much! I still want to get around it, but he included some tips on how to reduce the degree of reality fluctuation over time and through experience.  Main thing seemed to be that the fluctuations get worse generally as the projection continues, due to the physical mind entering a dreaming state and relating the dream content to the projected double through the silver cord..

I wouldn't have picked up AD to check if you hadn't mentioned it -

Patty

Hi Tia,

I don't know about the feelings..... (I don't even know for certain that I am genuinely 'out' during these experiences, or else I wouldn't set up experiments to prove it to myself!)  Here is what I think about the feelings, though.

The first couple times I tried to get out and got stuck, I started with my hands and methodically pulled out my arms, towards my shoulders, and then things got too hard to pull out past my shoulders ---- the more I tried the more I started waking up. Like I said, it felt sticky pulling out, and I had marginal awareness of my body - awareness that it was asleep, but awareness.

The last time (the time I got out) I tried something that I have used in the past. It is more of an instantaneous blipping to a new place.  it was sort of like, I was on the awake/asleep line, and skating back and forth. And holding intent to stay alert. Instead of trying to pull out when I was on the awake side of the line, I tried just being out. I think the upshot of which might be - that you blip out of awareness long enough to pull away from your body and then you blip back into awareness.

So the time I finally walked away - I don't remember the exit, but I do  remember the moment immediately before and the moment immediately after (three feet from the bed, walking away.)

Usually I will feel the carpet under my feet very tactilely. This time I didn't.  I noticed that as unusual.   I also don't remember going through the doorway to the bathroom. I just remember walking towards the bathroom, then being in the bathroom. Maybe at the time I did consciously experience it, and forgot? I think intent is so important. I intended to see the cards, and I remember that part fairly well. I think wherever you focus your intent, and I mean really focus it, that is where you will see your experiences.

What are your feelings like during exit and experience? I recall you had hearing - you heard your partner and the policeman - Other feelings or senses?

I also don't know about reality fluctuations. I sometimes think it is a safeguard I am building into the experience so that I don't really have to believe it was real if I don't want to.

But I'm not certain.

It's my big question, I've been working on it a while without much resolution. I want to move on to new ground - but not until I am convinced that these are really real.

I know what you mean about the cd's. And not only do they stop the hemisync, they also bring you back to C1!  I'd rather they just left me floating.

I think some on the website have continuous playback capabilities,  I haven't gotten any of those.

THANK YOU for your feedback.


Patty

Tom -

i like your answers. They line up with my own experience.

Patty

Ahhhh man.  Rats.

Patty

I got out of bed, walked over to the bathroom to try to identify the playing card that I set out before bed. I have two 'decks' that I am using. One (deck A)is just red aces and black face cards, and from that deck I want to identify simply red ace or black face card (odds of success, 1 in 2). The other deck (deck B)is standard, and I want to see if I can identify the exact card and suit. (this requires far more precision, odds of success 1 in 52). (Let me say at the outset that I 'failed' in identifying the cards precisely, though I did accurately see a black face card for deck A. This sort-of result is what I often encounter.)

First, for deck A, I saw the ten of clubs. I was puzzled. I didn't immediately remember if I had tens in the deck or not. I thought about it, and decided that I had not included tens with the face cards. So I pick up the card, and it changes to the J of clubs. It changed to another black face card after that. I thought "Man, this sucks." I tried to mentally force the card to change to the 5 of diamonds, to see just how much plasticity was in the environment. The card started to change to the five of diamonds, but then snapped back to a black face card. I set it down, cleared my mind a bit and looked at the card - king of clubs. I decided to take that as my 'final answer.' The card from the standard deck (deck b) also was changing. Mostly from 4 of spades to 6 of spades.  (I think, I am REALLY having a hard time remembering this part.) I looked away, cleared my mind, looked back, and saw the 2 of diamonds (I think.) So I went with that.

Then I stood and wondered what to do next - and decided to return to body to record this. I was thrilled that I had gotten out. Absolutely thrilled. I walked back to the bedroom and said something as I stood by the bed. I don't remember what I said, but I remember being surprised that I could hear so well, often I don't hear a thing while on a travel. Mike (who was fast asleep in the physical world) responded to me - said something - don't recall what. Maybe that my hands were cold. I jumped into the air, did a triple flip (or some other fun maneuver) and dived back into my body - brushing my hand through Mike's body for fun as I re-entered.

(False awakening) I woke up and felt my hands. They were indeed cold. I decided to go check the cards right away so that I wouldn't forget by  morning what I had seen. I go to the bathroom, and pick up a card, and it is the  K of clubs. I turn it over and realize there is a face card (Q spades) on the back side of the card, too. Then I realize that there are too many cards on the counter, and I realize that I am dreaming. (it amazes me that we can distinguish a dream like this from an astral travel - on paper these must sound very similar but in experience they feel very different.) I slapped myself to wake up, thought about going outside to scream to wake myself up but I realized that the house was alarmed and if I opened the front door sirens would go off.  (I guess a lot of the inconsistencies - like the fact that a dream siren won't wake the physical neighbors - weren't very apparent to me at this point.) Anyway, I genuinely woke up about then.

First I wrote down what I had 'seen' while travelling - k clubs and 2 diamonds.  Then I went to check.

Darn it all, the cards were the jack of spades and the 5 of spades.

Here's some of the things I wonder.  For Deck A I did succeed in identifying black face card (not red ace.)  For deck B, I can't help but remember how I saw the four of spades/six of spades flipping back and forth and the actual card was the five of spades.

I am not one to try to make data fit after the fact, but I AM trying to figure out if we truly travel to these astral planes and they have this sort of malleability - was I witnessing this sort of thing with the playing cards? How does this work? HOw do we stop it? Isn't there supposed to be a plane near the physical that has essentially no malleability? I find it interesting that I had difficulty changing the black face card to a five of diamonds. Overall, I am thrilled that I got out. Just absolutely thrilled.  Man, I want to get this 'ability' down pat.

Your thoughts and comments are extremely welcome.

Patty

http://www.boundaryinstitute.org/

I don't know if they have pointers - but it is a good site.

My best luck has been when I haven't been at it for a long time, and when I try to RV from the 'awake/asleep' line. I set my intent to tap into the 'knowledge matrix' ---- sort of imagine myself becoming one with the target and allowing the knowledge of the target to come to my conscious understanding. Actually, now that you mention it, I think it is similar to Frank's thinking on an area of the brain being involved in projection ---- if you let your awareness go to the right 'module' in your brain (melvin morse calls it the 'god module') you sort of start to feel in synch with the idea that all knowledge exists and can come to you.

But even under best circumstamces I personally generally only get a single 'flash' which is still open to interpretation.

My personal methods are not at all rigorous as Ed Dames etc are. Maybe my methods are closer to clairvoyance, though I think the two are essentially the same.

I think Kakkarot mentioned RV (in passing)over on astral chat. look at his 'guess who's back' thread. Maybe ides or someone else also mentioned it, and I mentioned the boundary institute there, too.

Patty

Probably varies for the individual - I tend to sleep more than project, but project (or find myself projected) occasionally.  Very very occasionally I need to sleep more deeply than I am doing of my own accord.

For me, the scales can be tipped by simply setting my personal intent. Maybe journaling to myself the importance of sleep (or projection, depending on the current 'need.')  

It sounds like your scale tips towards becoming aware of projection. Spend five minutes journaling before bed, about whatever's bugging you (sort of settles the mind, and communicates to your subconscious that you wish for a good night's sleep).  Then go to bed with the comfortable but firm intent to have a good night's sleep. Not strained intent,  but authoritative comfortable intent.

Over time you will probably notice more rest-filled nights and fewer wakeful nights.

A heavy meal doesn't hurt, either.

Patty

Hi Jouni,

My loss was close to seven years ago.  Thank you for your condolences.

I suspect we agree on far more than we disagree on.  That being said, I believe it is entirely possible that there is no point to existence - that we are no more than this crude stuff.

It's a depressing thought.

I console myself with the idea that even if "this" is all there is - this is still my moment of consciousness. It is truly awe-inspiring to look at the cosmos and realize that we have a conscious awareness of it, and that we are part of it. Sometimes it doesn't matter to me if the show ends when I die.

But often I would prefer there to be more - so you know, the search for meaning.

By the way, I agree that a big block is to unlearn conditions that have been programmed into us.

Hey Rodentmouse. I wanted to say something else in regards to your original question.

You know, Robert's book is well titled. "Astral dynamics." Kind of gives the feel of the energetic mechanics behind the experience.  But there is more to it than mechanics, and although I love and value RB's book - I also love and value the books that deal with how our beliefs shape (or limit) our experience. In particular, check out Rick Stack's very easy, inexpensive book " Out of Body Adventures" (http://www.addall.com/Browse/Detail/0809245604.html) which contains exercises that complement Mr Bruce's exercises very well. They are designed to help you identify subconscious beliefs that might be keeping you grounded.

It seems like gruntwork while you are doing it (lots of essay writing and affirmations and so on) but it is really helpful in getting in touch with some blocks you may not be aware you have.

You seem result-oriented, which is why I recommend this book in particular. If you are interested in more philosophically-based books on beliefs and how they shape experience, then go for any of the Seth books(author Jane Roberts). Also, author Bruce Moen frames his thinking on nonphysicality in terms of belief structure.

Patty

In terms of the 'fun' and 'mind-expanding' qualities that accompany astral travel, I don't think it matters much if we are awake or asleep when the experience happens - provided we remember the experience.

But in terms of understanding the underlying reason for the human experience of OBE, yes it matters if we are awake or asleep when we have the experience.  Because it matters if it is (a) a dream, or  (b) an objective state of being separate from a physical vehicle for consciousness.  (One could likewise ask whether it matters if dreams are 'real' or not - and obviously with some dreams, like the ones where I am strangling my children, it does.)

If it is a dream (even if it does not feel like a dream) then OBEs say nothing about consciousness surviving bodily death.

If it is not a dream, but is truly an objective state where we are conscious and without a body, then that is a strong piece of evidence that we survive bodily death.

Finally, it matters whether we are awake or asleep from an experiential point of view because when approached from a sleeping state there tends (for me) to be more dream elements, and less-than-complete consciousness.  I personally prefer more completely conscious episodes wherein I recognize inconsistencies between the experience and physical reality, and the more 'concrete' the experience -  the better. (that is, the more it reflects physical reality, the better.)  Again, this gets to my search for verification, and the question of whether we survive bodily death. I have had some very nicely verified experiences, but I am far from 100% convinced that OBE's reflect an objective state of being separate from the body.

(I'm a hard case, due to losing to a child.)

Patty

Nahhhh, give me a nice merlot and some jazz vocals.  Rosemary Clooney just died last week - Think I need to go get one of her CDs.

Welcome back, kakkarot! We had a nice trip ourselves to the red rock state of Utah. Beautiful scenery, very spiritual place, open big sky, native american lore, good dinosaur digs (yeah, that's right, fossils can invoke a spiritual experience.  You know, huge stretches of time, it boggles the mind.).

Sounds like there is some RV interest on the board. The boundary institute has some fun online RV 'stuff.'

Patty

Don't you think that it depends how 'asleep' your body is?

Sometimes I can just 'walk away' (and I think I am awake at the time) but afterwards I feel like the experience wasn't really from an awake state.  (I guess I don't know, ultimately, if I am awake or asleep when I project.) At the time it seems one way, in retrospect it seems another way.  I am guessing the people who can just blip away when they are vibrating are either very experienced projectors, or are saying that they did this while awake but that if you experienced it yourself, you might not consider it a conscious exit.  (but I can only hazard a guess based on my limited personal experiences, which vary widely in terms of degree of consciousness, the 'state' at which I experience them, the amount of dream content,  and so on.)

Like you, I also get frustrated when I get some sort of vibration (more like a warm buzz for me) only to have it fade away.  I think that the more relaxed I am when I get the vibrations, the more I can just walk away. but then I run into the problem of .... Was I really just 'relaxed' or was I actually asleep? (and was it just a dream?)  (This is why I am so hung up on verification.)

My wings seem completely clipped lately, anmd I am very frustrated about it!

Patty

Thanks all,

this is a good thread. Gonna try that focus - moving the energy to the pineal area. Can't comfortably roll my eyes; I assume it is not necessary as long as focus is on the spot?

Patty

p.s.

I had a dream a few years ago that I still wonder about. I was 'walking with the dalai llama' (for some reason that is the way I am supposed to phrase it) and was speaking of my expanded consciousness thinking he would be glad of it.  He wore monkish clothing and I wore traditional american stuff. My philosophy has always be that it is what is 'inside' that counts, so clothing doesn't matter.

His response to me was that our clothing is important. Essentially, if I want to have a more buddhist outlook, that what I wear is important.

That conflicts with how I see buddhism.

Any thoughts?

Incidentally, he also told me that my deceased father would visit me three times the next weekend. And wouldn't you know it, I dreamt of him Friday and Saturday, don't remember the sunday dreams (but I still take it as a sort of confirmation of the encounter with the dalai llama in the dream.)

Patty

hi Bhikku,

Well, given the burqa and the message - Sounds to me like a call back to the 'fundamentals.'  We can all get caught up in the bright lights and excitement that accompanies astral experience ----- and forget the simple things. (things like nothingness, emptiness is form and form is emptiness, all that kinda stuff. Simple love, set aside the ego, etc.)

the lipstick is interesting. Maybe she was pretty to direct your attention to the possibility that some CHOOSE a constrained lifestyle (or astral style) because they believe it to be a better path. Still, I am wondering about the lipstick.

Now, whether a call back to fundamentals or to restraint is a good thing or not is probably up to the individual to decide.  

Neat dream.

Patty

Wooohaa!

love it. thanks for the update. You also give me hope that this energy raising bit can really have an effect!  Congratulations!

I wonder if raising energy several times a day would be helpful to me, too.... Maybe I'll try that!

Patty

Hi Ralph,

I think I used to have more sleep projections because even though I was falling asleep, I was falling asleep still fimly intending to stay awake. Now I fall asleep because after a little energy/mind work I feel like sleeping!

I hope I have a projection soon............

Do tell your interesting experience. I would love to hear it.

Patty

I'm going to go in reverse order here -

Tisha - HAH! I love it! Thank you for your forthright attitude. I would love your quickie suggestions in personal mail, particularly if they aren't orally-fixated. (TMJ disorder, groan, you get past one hangup only to find you have another.) I don't know if I will implement the morning routine - but it will definitely go in my 'consider' category.  Sunday mornings I generally sleep in,. so I know from experience that projections can be quite good in the mornings. Wow - to have that luxury on a more frequent basis - - - - definitely gonna consider this.

Hi RM,

I have been aware of my own hypnogogic imagery for a few years, since getting into Bruce Moen's work/website (his site changes with the passage of time and I don't currently visit.) I guess I considered hypnogogia a separate phenomenon than anything chakra related, but for no particular reason. Maybe there is some relation between the two. I hadn't spent much time on looking at individual chakras and whether they were closed/open until maybe eight months ago. I mean, I knew that I couldn't get energy to my head, but I never really tried to 'fix' it til reading Robert's book. Then I tried the energy circuit and found blockage in my lower spine. I worked on that blockage about four months ago. That was when I saw a physical manifestation of clearing blockage - I was trying to clear the lower spine blockage through the bread breaking and wrapping techniques and when I got up to pee I saw all these red marks radiating out from my lower spine. Weird! Cool! Radical! I also coincidentally felt that the blockage was reduced significantly.

So anyway, I took a break for a couple months and lately returned, and this time around, I had been focusing on my throat (I think that area holds the last MAJOR blockage, though I am guessing that blocks can occur any old time and maybe everyone carries minor blocks?) So I have had good luck the last couple weeks, the throat area feels relatively clear.

Bottom line, Yes - I think everything is relatively clear. I can raise energy to the brow with relative ease, though there is still some constriction in the throat.  Things are much flow-ier than they were. I can hold a buzz in my head now, which is a relatively recent phenomenon and kind of a charge.

Now, RM, that being said - I am far from convinced that clearing chakras is important for projection.  It seems like a good, worthwhile, certainly related activity. But I don't see any relative increase in the altered conscious experiences that I have and the relative 'flow' of the chakra system.  I am still going with the idea that since I have cleared the system I will have 'better' experiences, but that remains to be seen. (As I mentioned in my post on relation between chakra and AP, I see a relationship - but the 'best' projections were independent of any chakra awareness let alone chakra clearing.)  I kind of think that intense desire is more of an indicator for successful projection - that's one reason I think YOU are gonna get there real soon! Finally, I don't know what ALL of the chakras are - so though I would say that I can raise energy through the major ones, no doubt there are eddies and backups in some of the minor ones. Aren't there something like 200 chakras?

I think my main hangup at present is that I can't hold awareness as my body drifts off. Last night I was thinking about it consciousness as being a point in your head - the greater your consciousness, the bigger the point. Normally for most folks, the point is either here in the physical world or there in the aastral world. In order to have physical awareness of an astral experience, you have to be able to stretch your consciousness to the point that it can reside in both places simultaneously - so the bigger the point, the better your chances.  I don't really think this is an apt analogy, but to the extent that my awareness feels inadequate at the moment to stay 'here' while it also drifts 'there,'  it fits.

hi Frank,

I am glad to hear that you have similar experiences! - Dissappointed I admit; I was thinking you might be able to offer an incantation or something, but the thought that we all have to face the same obstacles is comforting.  Tonite I decided to have the wine so I expect sleep will feel  even more alluring than normal. Sigh. It got me through the evil hours of 4 - 8  when the kids are possessed. Tradeoffs.

Patty

You know, I think there is something similar in waking life, too. It's as though we are limited to thinking about only what is in front of us. Have you ever tried telling someone how to drive somewhere and found that you were unable to remember all the turns and whatnot - but that when you personally drove there you had no trouble finding the way? Or if you go to one end of the house to get something and you forget what it is. You go back to where you started and then you can remember "oh yeah, I wanted to change into my sandals."

i think the same thing is going on (but to a greater degree) when you are in the astral realm as opposed to the physical realm. I think working on greater consciousness is worthwhile - it may be something simple like developing mnemonic devices to remind yourself that if you are astral, then your perception might be affected and to try to maintain awarenesss of that. I think the confusion that you mention is a larger example of a common waking experience of limited cognition of that which is not right in front of us..

I'm seeing through this forum that there are levels upon levels. A few years ago, I thought I was 'advanced' relative to friends and family because I remembered my dreams and they didn't.  I thought that those who had projections must be way way advanced, top of the top. Well, after having a few projections, now I think that those who have conscious projections are where it's "at." Another level. But then I read about other levels of mysticism, like where Robert talked about raising kundalini - and I feel like he's talking about another level. No doubt there are levels beyond that, too!  Perhaps the 'angels' that he talks about.  Maybe it never ends!

I guess I went off on a tangent.

$0.02

Patty

Hi,

I get that too- Also lately have been getting a sensation like there is a block of wood in my chest. This is a new one on me -

i don't have any words of wisdom. I'm taking the approach of allowing it and trying to relax into it. Seems to work with the heart beat thing - (i haven't checked to see if my actual heart is beating that fast or not) - it races for a while and starts to reduce as I try to accept it -

I wonder if it is serving a purpose of some sort - like the engine needs to race in order to get the machine revved up for take off. Don't know, still exploring. (presumably this doesn't happen as one becomes more advanced with this sort of thing.)

I am also still staying focused on the goal, try not to get hung up on these experiences, may be a long haul - hopefully not!

Patty

Hi Jouni -

I agree that it can be frustrating to fail, but I currently think it is important to continue to work towards the goal as best you are able. Don't get me wrong -just forgetting about it for a while might allow you to have an experience that you would be too frustrated to have otherwise,  but although I have had sporadic experiences over the last few years with that approach, I haven't seen any real progress in my abilities. I think working towards the goal, even if it seems like there is little payoff (but usually you can identify some small payoff - like better dream recall or a new sensation) is a better course for the long haul.

I read your other post asking for input - I wish I had something useful to offer but I don't have much - except that trusting your instincts is good, and focusing is good - So you might want to immerse yourself in Astral Dynamics to build a thought-framework to work with?  I also like Bob Monroe's thinking on the topic, and Bob Peterson's. (both are authors.)

Frank - it was good for me to reread your post on relaxation, the one two posts up. I am curious if you have vibrations or what signals tell you to exit? I can relax to some degree, and when I focus on a point outside my body there is immediate tugging on 'me' in that direction, but clearly something is holding me in. Not relaxed enough? Do I need to wait for vibrations? (my obe's and other altered conscious experiences have primarily been from a sleep state wherein I regained conscious awareness.) What's the "password" to pass "go?"

Patty

G'day, yourself.

You know, my mother grew up in Sydney. Everyone thought she was the exotic one when she moved back to the states.

Thank you so much for directing me to your photo. It has verified my projection beyond any doubt.

Thank you also for your answers here. I can appreciate the demands of children on one's time and I look forward to the time when I can devote more effort into astral pursuits.

Patty

Hi Gexx and everyone,

I'm in the same category- I often become aware of being 'out' after falling asleep and during spells where I am consciously trying. If I am lucky, I will become conscious during the exit, or become conscious when exit is possible, and will feel the exit procedure. That's kind of a rush, and I always figured the reason I couldn't exit from waking consciousness is because I do not trance deeply enough from wakefulness.

Sometimes when I am away from altered consciousness for a while, I will feel instinctively that 'all systems are go' and will attempt it that night - often with success.

It seems like there are two schools of thought. One is that these things will happen when they happen and you are better off letting it go for a while. the other is that the more you practice, the better you become.

I have been trying daily faithfully for the last three or four weeks with two mild early experiences (one verified), but the last week really have felt very little when raising energy etc. So I don't know if I am pushing things too hard. (nice to have a forum where people can relate.) But I am going to stick with it this time and give it a solid three months before deciding that there is anything to the idea of letting it happen when it happens.  I think like any biological system, the more you use it the stronger it becomes.

My biggest piece of advice as far as success goes - Fervent desire. Are you half hearted about it? Do you kinda want this, or do you really need this down to your soul's core?  I believe that the more you want this, the better your chances are. You will go into it more forcefully, bring more intent, more determination and you won't let something trivial like distracting thoughts sway you from the experience. So if you are not fully desirous of the experience that you are seeking, you might want to fan the flames of whatever desire you do have.  Really stoke it.

That's when I have the best luck.

(Clarine, your english is fine.  And I had a nice vibration - buzz when I woke slowly this morning, too!)

Patty