Messages

Some more of what is happening. Last night during one of the healing sessions I was having, while I was in trance, I could feel where this entity is in my head. I have felt it before but am getting a much clearer idea of where what seems to be its main attachment point is. If you stick your thumb in your mouth with the nail facing downwards and run the tip of your thumb back along the roof of your mouth you come to the end of the bone to a soft fleshy part. It's just above the roof of my mouth at the spot where the bone ends and soft part starts. From there it seems to have cords attached to other points such as where the jaws join just below the ears (where I believe there are secondary chakras). I could also feel a very numb energy feeling in the centre of my head and also crown chakra.

Anyway, it looks like it's not going to go without putting up a fight and this might take a little longer than I expected. While in trance I started drawing pentagrams of light with my astral hands and throwing them at it like ninja stars, making them explode on contact trying to loosen its grip to where it is attached. It seemed to have a little bit of effect so I may keep trying it when I get the chance. But anyway, I know now that it's main attachment is inside the skull (I can feel it moving about every so often like a throbbing sensation), from where it might be possibly somehow connecting to the brain/CNS (or trying to).

Here's an old journal entry from the last time I felt this thing there, but didn't at the time know for sure what it was.

7th Jan 2001 00:52
I have just got out of the shower after a trance meditation. I did some energy work and it was mind blowing. I sort of just went with intuition as to what i was doing, built a cone of light above and below me so i was encased in it, then was sending waves of light/energy all around the contours of my body, at one point i was spiraling a line of energy up and down my body (cross legged), imagining any attachments being dissolved and cut away. Also remember being inside a blue flame. Then i started vibrating Om.. it just felt right.. but i was doing it from low to high pitch... the tone sounded VERY loud and was vibrating all around me. After a while i said prayers in trance asking the Great White Brotherhood for assistance and guidance etc. Then i tried to exit my body.. got the tingling body and throbbing heart chakra at one point... i opened all my chakras and energy flooding my room and all around me.. i tranced deeper.... i stopped trying to exit and just floated in mind... at this point i could feel something tugging at the inside of my brain. Well its not my brain.. but feels like inside my skull.. it was as if either myself, or someone/thing, was slowly moving the whole inside of my skull (like a ball of energy inside it) up and down... my head was slightly heavy. This felt like going from my throat through roof of mouth to core of brain... wiggling up and down slowly. There was something watching me and either asked, or noticed, that i could actually feel this movement inside me. My brow chakra and crown chakra were very active... slight pressure on brow and top of nose. As i write this i still have a sensation inside my head and crown chakra... feels a little heavy/throbbing..... i just got an impression... a thought..... from me, or something... i just saw a Lotus bud moving from below the surface of water and emerging above. But at the same time i just saw this, i re-lived the inner sensation i just mentioned.. up throat to centre of head etc. I kind of saw both things at the same time as though the lotus bud was inside my throat/head and the surface of the water was above my crown chakra. Have to forgive me but i'm still a little spaced from the trance, even after a shower.
one cigarrette later.
Now i cant decide wether this numb-dull-heavy feeling in the core of my head is Kundalini or something else moving there. It's not painful, only slightly uncomfortable... the whole top of my head and deep inside it too is kinda numb. Thinking back now to my trance 30 minutes ago... it did feel as though something was trying to move up my throat and out the top of my head.... after i had re-surfaced and opened my eyes... i sat there staring into the mirror.. everything took on a ... blurry vision type look as i sat staring at my brow chakra in the mirror.. still in semi trance.. my eyes wide open my vision was going blurry and surreal (although i could have stopped this if i re-focused) and like invisible whispy smoke(almost liquid like) running/moving over my eyes(retina).
Went for shower and my t-shirt was soaked with sweat (its winter here).
Wow, hope this isnt too long, i'm kinda auto writing as if remembering a dream. Oh, when i was in trance, i was using awareness hands that Rob Bruce mentions in NEW(like astral hands) to brush up and down my spine (like brushing cobwebs(any attachments) off me) and i also kind of did this inside my skull too(i think i did inside skull -thinking of my mind and cleaning any attachments that may be in my personal inner meta-space.. hmmm), and sealed the inside with a circled pentagram, just managed to remember that part.
--------

So anyway, it's obviously a nasty little bugger and means business, but my fight to get it out of me isn't so one-sided anymore.

No it means that you should go see a doc cuz youve probly come down with the flu  

I don't see how this is a laughing matter. The person was being serious and obviously has a problem and you're cracking jokes? Doesn't that seem to you to be a little... insensitive?

(snips the rest)

And I hate to be blunt (I'm not one who enjoys causing friction) but it's obvious from the rest of your post that you know very little about the subject of negs. Can I ask if you have a spirit guide?

But spirits -- even good ones -- are in a different time frame than we're in.  Things change for us material beings and the spirit just doesn't get it.  Not unlike a lover who doesn't understand that yes, they're still loved (or not) AND it's time to let go and move on.  And they cling too tight.

What you just described is a low-level spirit pretending to be a spirit guide. Higher level spirits are far more intelligent that what you describe above and they certainly don't need to cling (attach) to you. There are some 'ghosts' that really don't mean to do any harm, but they still have to feed off you to survive, which harms you in the long run. So they give 'advice' in exchange for the energy they steal. A lot of the time this 'advice' is made up from knowledge you already know or things it may have learnt off its previous host. If I had a spirit guide like you describe above I would work on getting rid of it straight away (it probably wouldn't leave by itself and come up with all sorts of excuses why i.e. "We made an agreement prior to your incarnation" or "We have important spiritual work to do together" are the typical kind of thing used to pursuade one to allow it to stay and continue feeding). Read the article I posted in the "Depression" thread on this forum.

A good exercise to do with spirits is to tell them to go and leave for 3 months and not come back until you call them. Any good spirit will fully understand and respect your wishes. If it won't go, then you have a problem.

[very strong]

And so the thought of letting a "good spirit" enter me, is not something I would ever consider.

Well, you know, that is really quite a sensible approach. Allowing a spirit to connect with one is not something I would normally try myself or even recommend to others. But there were so many synchronicities that led me to it that I felt confident enough to give it a go. I've made myself the 'guinea pig' in this thread; if things go wrong (not that I wish to tempt fate, of course ) then you'll know it's no good. But actually, it IS working. There is still something in my aura/body, but it is getting weaker by the day. At first I was a little disappointed that the entities weren't gone straight away, but I now see that it will just take a little bit of time and effort before my neg problem is gone for good. In fact, I've never been so confident in the 8 years of neg trouble that I've actually found something that just might be working.

I've had two very strong healing sessions tonight. There is so much energy flowing through me it almost feels like I'm connected into the mains electric supply. It kind of feels like a dimmer switch is being slowly turned up and as it does so the entity gets weaker. Kind of like my vibration is rising beyond where the negs are able to affect me. My entire body is literally tingling with what I can only describe as Spiritual Power that at times is verging towards ecstasy (it's quite hard to explain). I would imagine it to be fairly easy to Astral Project from this state. I did make a short attempt earlier, but then felt I was trying to rush things, so stopped.

All the self-hate thought patterns should be stopped as fast as they can be.

The following is taken from:

http://www.hermetic.com/heidrick/abramel.html

KITTY JUST ATE THE NEIGHBOR'S DOG

It's possible to make a mistake and pick the wrong spirit, instead of the Holy Guardian Angel. The H.G.A. is something that you can release yourself to completely and still end up being the same individual you were in the beginning. People tend to get a little weird doing a magical retirement, so it's a good idea to keep a diary. With a diary, you can read old entries and figure out how you got to where you are now. If necessary, you can go back again. My favorite test is to take a break once in a while and go into a Safeway or something like that. If you can stand it, you're still sane. That's the definition of sanity in this culture, able to take care of the minimum. Being able to endure a supermarket long enough to harmlessly obtain food is pretty minimal. There is a thing called a lemure or Larva. You can attract a hungry spirit, usually a wandering Nephesh, something that is dependent on somebody else to stay around. You're "it"; you've volunteered as life-support. Such a spirit is willing to pretend to be anything in order to keep on sucking. That's not the H.G.A. That's just a trap that people fall into, because they have been told that's all there is. The majority of those cases are what the Romans would call lemures or larvae, the Tibetans hungry ghosts, and the Hassids Dibukim. Such spirits need attention to live. It is just like a failed relationship with a mate. If that other person is dependent on you for shelter and food or for some important but less tangible thing, they'll do anything up to the limits of their nature to keep you the way you are. If you want them to be something, they will turn into it. If you are angry, you will tend to evoke greater anger from them, resulting in passive reaction on your part. The partner in such a dysfunctional relationship may realize: "if this guy gets out of hand, all I have to do is yell at him. All I have to do is hit 'em once and 'es just as quiet as anything." People will usually do the things that get them what they want. Not every one, sometimes people are remarkably stuck in one track. These are lesser spirits, whatever you want to call them, hungry ghosts, vampires... that's what the word "vampire" really meant. It was a member of the family who hung around after he died, as long as you gave him useful things to do that weren't too difficult. Vampires aren't always considered to be monsters who make life terrible for you; they can be good to have around. They chase off peddlers, robbers, whatnot. When a stranger comes to the house, the vampire will feel very protective of the family. A "vampire" will pick up on it if a person doesn't like them: "O'h, 'don't like' means I get attention!" Then they will proceed to do more irritating things to that person. Keeping peace with the spirits of the ancestors is very important in cultures around the world. The Romans called the friendly ancestral spirits Lares and the pesky ones Larvae. You want Great Grand Mother's ghost to bark at strangers, not at reasonably behaved family members. This kind of thing isn't the Holy Guardian Angel. This kind of thing is what happens when something eats off of you. A certain amount of this is harmless, but you want to make sure that you are in charge. In some states of mind people leak like a sieve. A lot of life is being generated, not being used by the person generating it, and it's there for the taking. Something comes and says: "This is lunch. How do we make this a 24 hour diner? Very simple. Every time this person thinks; 'O'h God if I haven't ...!', he turns loose all this energy. So, let's see: 'Hay! God I haven't!' or 'Why did I do that!' -- that's a new one. That tastes better. 'Your such a bummer' -- works too. Hot d*mn! 'You hate hating yourself, don't you!' More food!". If you ever get really depressed, between sobs, wrenches and tremors, pick up on what you are saying to yourself. Maybe it isn't you talking. Maybe it's some astral clown saying: "Watch him go!" This kind of thing is often marked by painful ideas that relay back inwardly to create more painful ideas. In order to get rid of a depression feedback loop, you've got to realize that this isn't you. The destructive voice is not really rational. Jokes and humorous self-observations, the more tasteless and jolting the better, will break this sort of cycle. If you get that kind of thing going, realize it isn't the Holy Guardian Angel. That is a wrong turn. Go back and try again. That is a demon, and that is one of the things that the Holy Guardian Angel is supposed to help you with. It's probably a very stupid demon, who is only good at picking up on things to say.

http://www.indotalisman.com/Khodam.html

"Cleanliness is required in mind, body, and soul--and of course, one's place of practice. Dirt, whether physical, psychological, or metaphysical, attracts the inhabitants of the lower spheres."

Let me share a story by a friend of mine. Her husband had died recently at a young age when this happened. There are typos and grammatical errors, but I have left those in because they kind of reflect the emotions she was feeling while writing this down. The first draft was all one block, it must have been hard for her to relive some of these memories.

My Angel by Rose

Gettin to the hosptial that day thinking everything is goin to be fine. David will be home soon. It is 10 am.We can see David now, but only for 10 mintues. I go in to see him. He layin there.I thought he was a sleep. I sit down, "he say's" I love you baby. but Im not comin home this time. I said, David hush please, "he say", It is true baby I'm not. Please remember, "How much I love you." And that I will always be there watchin over you.

  The nurse came in and say we have to leave now. Soon David will be taken for test.Then put dialysis for his kidneys. They have stopped working. As I was walkin out of the room." David said", Remember, "I love you baby", And I won't be talking to you again.  Tears was rolling down my cheeks. I didn't want to leave. I wanted to go back and be there with him. "Please", I said, "Lord let me go back please" .

I went back to the waiting room. At 12 I could go in and see him again. Vikki, had left. She had to go to work, but would be back after work. I waited for 12 to come. At 12, I went back to Davids room. He wasnt there.  The nurse came by and said they had taken him for the test.  I went back to the waiting room. Had been sit for about 10 mintues. They called code blue. I was like," oo no no." It can't be, but I knew it was.I  really knew in my heart it was David. I  looked up there was a nurse stand in front of me. "Saying Mrs **** ", Come with me please. I just said," Nooo nooo please nooooo". The nurse took my arm. We went to a private room. She was talking, " please make her hush".I dont want to hear it no. No David is fine. She is lieing. Tell her to shut up please. The doctor comes in say. I'm sorry there was nuffin we could do he is gone. No, he isn't gone. No we have 3 kids. He has to help me rasie our kids. He isn't gone stop it now . They call Vikki. They say she is on her way. Why does she need to come? David is fine. Vikki doesn't need to come here.

 Vikki gets to the hosptial. They ask if we would like to see David. Yes I want to see David. We go in to his room. He is just laying there. He looks so peaceful.  David please tell them you are fine. Please. It is time to leave. When will I wake up? Please let me wake up. I just want to wake up.

 I get home. Why are all these people here? I don't want them here. i just want my kids. Where are my kids? I can't stop cryin. Please just make everyone leave. I don't want anyone, but the kids here. David will be upset with all these people. Stop trying to make me eat I don't want to not until David gets here.  What was that pill? I don't need no pills. Yes I am tired. Why yes I will lay down. Waking up looking at the clock. Oh my! I over slepted David is late for work. I jump up. I grab David. Oh, It isn't David it is Matt.(my 11 year old son) I look at him. Oh no!  I start crying. It hit me David is gone. Please lord let him come back to me please. I need him so bad. I will be good. I promise lord let him come back. They tell me I have to plan Davids funeral. I dont want to.  Just don't bother me. You do it what ever you decide. It will be fine with me. They wouldn't stop they was all say I had to do this. I said I didn't want too I want to be left alone. Just make them go away please. I just want to sit here and cry that is all. My life is over. After the funeral I told them all I wanted to go to my house.  Just me and kids be there no one else. I didn't want to do nuffin but sit in my room. Melissa (my 17 year old daughter) took care of everything. I hurt so much. I was so empty.

I started drinkin so I wouldnt hurt so much. No one was to come in my room unless they ask. I sit in the dark. I didnt eat. I lost down to 90 pounds. I looked bad. I knew if I kept up like this I wouldn't last long. I would be with David that is where I wanted to be. I didn't get dressed in the day time. I didn't asnwer the phone or  the door. I didn't want to see anyone at all.

 After 6 about months. One night sitting there in my room I was crying. I had been all day. I just prayed for the lord to take me. I need to go now I was ready. I hadn't had a drink for 2 days. I was praying to the lord please just take me please. When I felt someone touch my right hand. It was more of like a warm feeling than a touch. I opened my eyes the room was lite up. There in front of me was this angel. I blinked my eyes to make sure I wasn't seeing things. He was wearin a off white robe it came down to the floor.  His wings was like of real feathers but yet they glimmered like pearls.  He had long hair. I have never seen anything as grand as this. I just knew i was safe with him there.  He spoke it not you time yet. The lord as a reason for you still being here. You are one of his special angel to help here. His voice was so soft as he spoke. As i heard his voice I was just so relaxed.   Go to bed and sleep tomrrow will  look better to you.  As he spoked his wings was like giveng off a warm rays. I could feel the pain being lifted from my heart as he spoke. There was a ring around the angel that was of bright yellow. The angel turned and started walking away. The room was grown dark. The lite was getting father away until there was just a dot of lite and it was gone. Then I felt something change in me. It was like  something was lifted out of me. I went to bed getting up the next morning feelin like I had just been borned again everything looks so much better to me. I could hear thr birds singin.  The flowers with such bright colors. I was ready to live again and I knew David was in a great place and  when my time comes I will see him again  *smiles *

Hello kaili,

I am trying to look as objectively as possible on what I have seen, felt and experienced-

May I ask if you have tried Roberts 'Belief System Cleanse' (Link at the bottom of all my posts)?

-but emotions are a part of me and I would be inhuman, a robot, not to have any, not to feel tremendously crushed and disappointed.

I don't think anyone is saying we should repress our emotions.

People can be insensitive to that sometimes, but mostly, just naive.  As if I have not tried positive affirmations thousands of times, sent love, etc.

What I posted at the end of my post was me trying to offer you encouragement because you sounded so despondant. I don't know what you may have tried, or are trying, which is why I asked you what you are doing right now to help yourself with your neg problem. Are you doing any spiritual exercises to protect yourself against negs or not?

 It simply does not work.  The negs--or whatever they are--don't care.  This is not about losing faith--I never had any faith to begin with--and I still don't believe in it.

Ok, perhaps I jumped the gun a bit from you saying, "Prior to my experience with negs, I believed in loving, non physical entities, what others would call angels." I wrote what felt right to write at the time when perhaps I shouldn't have written anything if it's not going to help you. I will try to be more careful.

  I try to get "energy signatures" but this is not often helpful because most of the time what I am dealing with is a projected illusion which, combined with their manipulation of my CNS might as well be real...and yet it's not.  In other words, think of a virtual reality game that is plugged into your brain, and various other parts of your body so that you not only see something, you feel it too--or smell it, etc.  If you are seeing something and feeling something than it is real, whether it's a manipulation (created reality) or not.  For all we know, all of earth and life is one giant hologram and yet it is real to those of us here experiencing life.

That sounds like a variation of the Philisophical question known as 'Brain in a Vat'.
http://www.csus.edu/indiv/m/mccormickm/BrainsInAVat.html

It's also a similar Philisophical question to Rene Descartes' "Evil Genius" hypothesis.
http://www.cofc.edu/~portmord/99230L4.htm

And of course the Matrix films.

McArthur--You choose to stick to your faith--I understand.  If that's how you feel, that's the route you should take, I know that.  But dont' assume that's the route for me.

I didn't so far as I am aware.

 You and I disagree on issues of a spiritual nature, and I don't mind disagreeing on philosophy.

Of course there's nothing wrong with having different philisophical views. If everyone agreed with everyone else it might be quite boring. But can we both have opposing beliefs and both have the "Truth" at the same time?

 I won't call you wrong--but give me equal respect.
Don't assume that I am bitter, or blind--perhaps my eyes are open despite the pain.  I have seen and experienced much more than I can tell in just a few posts, as I am sure have you.  

You think of the world in terms of duality--the good and the bad.
Yet you and I are what I would call "mixed beings" and yet, still Divine.  We are capable of both good and bad.

That is still a duality.

You have a very simplified belief (non challenging) in God and Angels.

You ask for equal respect but then start assuming that what I may or may not believe is 'simplified' and 'non challenging'.  And:

You think that God and Angels are pure love?  What you really mean to say is you want to believe that, to believe otherwise would hurt you deeply.

You are doing what I did in my previous post to you and assuming things from what little of my posts you have read. I will think about the rest of your post a little more before I make any response. Don't get the idea though it is because you have questioned my beliefs, it is for other reasons. Except for:

Let's each of us define what we experienced in our own way, without condemning the other-

I apologize if you felt I was somehow condemning you in my post, I even went out of my way to try and make sure it didn't come across that way. I was trying to help you, not condemn you. The only ones I would condemn are the negs.

-just let us know, does this "good" spirit that you had to obtain from a shaman do the job?

It's a legitimate question on the road to the truth.  If it works out for you, I will be relieved.  

It is a legitimate question yes, although the way you phrased it sounds a little sour. I "had to" get the Shaman to do it because he knows how to, I don't. The reason I started this thread was because I was trying yet another way of something to get rid of negs. I am not sure either way but I am giving it all the effort I have to make it work, because I want it to. If it doesn't, I will get up, dust myself down, and try something else.


LVX

McA
p.s. Is your real name Lisa?

One of the annoying people who actually helped me used to say: If you're going through Hell, don't pitch a tent. Just keep moving.

It's a quote of Sir Winston Churchill, "If you're going through Hell, keep going."

What you experienced reminded me of this I read a while back. I'm not saying it's related, just for reference.

http://memritv.org/Transcript.asp?P1=165

If you read the Al-An'am chapter of the Koran at home every day or two,
let's say, today half and tomorrow half, no jinns remain in the house. And
if you read the Al-Baqra chapter, Satan doesn't enter the house for 40 days.
This is well known. There are many, many things we must observe. In the book
The Forbidden and the Permitted it says that when the Prophet Muhammad
undressed, he folded his clothes. Why? So Satan would not wear them.

Host: When you say, to fold, you mean to roll up...

Sheik Ghantus: To fold means that the clothes would not be a total mess. Not
like children who undress and throw the clothes on the floor. They do not
hang them properly in the closet.

Host: Meaning the clothes should be hung, not folded

Sheik Ghantus: No, if they are folded it is better.

Host: As though they are ironed?

Sheik Ghantus: Exactly, as though they are ironed. If they are not, we want
to hang them up in the closet. This is also good, especially when there are
children. Why? Because if you hang clothing on the wall in the house, and
there are small children sleeping in the room, Satan comes, wears these
clothes and appears to the children. By Allah, not only children, adults as
well... I once lectured before an audience and said that you must not hang
clothing in the child's room because if the child wakes up and sees the
piece of clothing, Satan will come and the child may imagine that it is a
wild beast or a ghost and he would cry and scream at this sight. A man in
the audience said to me, "I swear that happened to me." I said, "What
happened?" He answered, "I woke up at night, opened my eyes and saw a white ghost. I closed my eyes and was afraid. After a while, I opened my eyes to see the ghost and I found out it was a woman's white prayer wrap that my wife had hung on the computer chair."

The truth has nothing to do with beliefs.  Prior to my experience with negs, I believed in loving, non physical entities, what others would call angels.  After this experience, I can only come to two conclusions--the benevolent ones are impotent, or won't help--or they are all the same Source, sometimes appearing as benevolent to fool humanity.

It sounds like you are blaming "angels" for the suffering caused by negs. Why not just blame the negs? Like I said previously this belief might be partly influenced by the negs themselves because it obviously fits their agenda.

The choice of conclusions you have come up with are all negative...  that seem designed to fit some preconcieved idea of what Angels are and whether they are supposed to help us at all times.

What you are saying is that neither God nor the Angels have helped you (as far as you are aware) with your neg problem so they too must therefore be bad. This is bad logic. What you are having is a kind of severe crisis of faith because you expected God or the Angels to protect you at all times. I've been there, I know it well. The utter despair, loneliness, feelings of powerlessness, abandonment, that perhaps God doesn't love one (because if He did why would he let this happen), Guilt etc etc. It becomes a downward spiral that negs then feed into trying to distort the whole thing all out of proportion. And that seems to be what is happening to you here. If you can start to realize some of this you can then begin to put an end to their manipulation.

And yes, they can fool you with overwhelming projections of love.

I totally disagree. Can't you see how the situation is even making you untrusting of loving energy? Stop and think for a minute or two and ask yourself if the above belief might be neg-influenced...    if you can't trust in Love then what can you trust? I feel for you the utter hopelessness that must have caused you to lose your trust in Loving energy, I've been in similar situations/thought-processes. You're going to have to re-find your trust in Spirit and in Life and to realize that things aren't quite as hopeless as some Negs would have you believe. I know it can be a hard task because I've been there, but I'm now recovering because I just plain flat-out refused to give in (and also because I'm a sore loser ) They sow the seeds of hopelessness and doubt because they know it works to grind people down and that you may just give in without a fight. And if you do that then they get to keep their food source. They really are insidious little buggers but they aren't as powerful or as organised as they would like you to believe. Part of how well they can maniplulate you is how much control they have over what you believe. Which is why they attempt to influence their victim to formulate various beliefs that will suit their agenda. If they think getting you to not trust a being that gives off loving energy will help their agenda they will do what they can to influence you into believing it.

And of course, if an Angel now turns up to try and help you and is giving off "overwhelming projections of love", will you trust it enough to let it help you? And if you won't let it help you, whose agenda does that serve? Yours or the negs?

Where do you think they get this love?

Who, God and the Angels? They are Love. Love is a form of higher energy, it is not something that can be stolen, "harvested" or faked. It's almost like you're saying the Sun needs to steal heat from the Earth.

If you meant negs then I can tell you I've never come across a neg giving off loving energy...  if it was able to emanate loving energy it wouldn't need to feed off others and wouldn't be a neg.

 What do you think this harvesting of energy is about anyway?
 Do you really believe they only harvest negative emotions?  The negs I am acquainted with love the positive emotions--humor, love, like, whatever.  They harvest both.

They feed off energy, full stop.

As I said, keep us updated.  I am more interested in the truth than in being right.  I am simply telling you my experience, my conclusions.  I can be proved wrong.  That's why it will be interesting to me if this "positive spirit" truly is able to rid you of negs.  

I'll keep posting in this thread anything that happens. I've had an intense healing session tonight. My heart and crown chakra are crackling with energy and I feel very empowered.

Don't give up, keep fighting, try to read something positive or watch comedy films (laughter is a form of banishment) and remember you're not alone in this problem.  A good book you may find helpful  is "Creative Visualization" by Shakti Gawain(sp?). What spiritual exercises are you doing to help yourself with this neg problem?

In Light

McA

Hi kaili, that was a very interesting post/story. I'm going to read it again a bit later when I'm warmer (I've only just turned my heating on and my hands are freezing so it's hard to type )

But I wanted to comment on this for now:

Can you imagine the headlines when humanity learns that what they think are "angels" are really parasites?

The negs giving you trouble are influencing you to believe this so that you lose all hope in your situation and give up. It is very understandable that you might fall into such a belief-trap, negs are extremely clever and cunning that way. But I assure you that Angels are not parasites and that they really do exist and are extremely powerful and loving Beings. If an Angel visits you, believe me you will know about it, the power emanating from them is so strong and positive that it's unmistakable (it almost feels 'too' strong... it's hard to explain).

Why Angels don't seem to be helping humanity more than we would like them to is a whole other subject that we could spend hours on.

---

As for my stuff, I had it shown to me last night that there is what seems to be an entity/attachment point stuck to my left foot where I have a verucca. I was in trance and could feel some kind of energy (maybe 6 inch by 2 inch) sticking through my foot near my toes.

Today I can feel what seems to be healing being done on me and various urges/thoughts induced by a resident neg seem to be almost gone (or very weak and weakening). My heart chakra has been very active today and I felt so happy it was close to Joy. I even managed to give my mother a short healing session and got rid of a pain she had at the top of, and in between, her shoulderblades. Due to neg interference I haven't been able to do any healing for a while because I have been low on energy, plus it didn't feel safe to give healing while I myself had neg problems. But that seems to be changing too.

More later.

McArthur--

Aren't you even the slightest bit nervous about allowing another entity into your space?  After my experience, and hearing about yours, I would never do that.  

Yes... but I'm running out of options and sick of having to put up with entity trouble for so long. So I'm willing to try almost anything. And it seems to be working. Khodams are sort of Angelic (or at least a kind of Light Being) and having had conversations with Aziz, and read up about Khodams, I feel pretty confident that he knows what he's doing and that it is safe. I guess it's a small leap of faith in a way but I've also followed certain signs along the way that led me to the decision.

Really, the most difficult part is making sure I don't open up to a neg thinking its the Khodam, as negs are quite good at pretending to be helping spirits.

If it was a spirit that just turned up 'out the blue' and claimed to be my 'spirit guide' I wouldn't want to know because that's how I got into this mess in the first place...   but this Khodam is specifically invoked to help and serve me and I set the rules etc.

I contacted Aziz via email and he told me he would get back to me and then never did.

Was this recently? He's had some pc trouble.

 I assume a distance healing would not be near as affective, although I did send a picture.

It doesn't make any difference I don't think. Healing is done from beyond space and time.

I would rather personally meet my "healer" anyway.

Yes it's always a bonus to meet physically I guess. Too many hucksters over the net imo.

Please keep us updated with your progress.  And if this last one does not leave, or more keep entering, let us know that too.  We are all learning how they operate, and the more truth we share the better.  Keeping silent is what keeps them in power.

Will do. I'm getting some insights today of how negs possibly somehow connect to the Central Nervous System, something which I think Robert Bruce thinks may be what happens in certain cases.

And there's something about Tinnitus I'm looking into...

http://tinyurl.com/3zgva
"but they were there all the time and were very disturbing in the beginning because they really knew how to get my attention!"

http://epl.meei.harvard.edu/~ral/LevineFremantle.pdf

addendum to above: There also seems to be an attachment point in the centre of my chest/heart chakra. I've had a small grisly lump there for years also (tried the circled cross but didnt seem to work, although I perhaps didn't do it for long enough). I'm not sure if the others connect to that or if it is separate (I was mainly concentrating on head area last night.).

Well I did the Khodam ritual, chanted for a few hours, and went to bed. As I was laying in bed I thought I would try and see if the Khodam was there so I put its bead on my brow chakra laying on my back. I hadn't wanted to talk to it via clairaudience at present because I have been fooled b4 by spirits pretending to be what they are not and the trauma related to those experiences makes me very apprehensive about opening up clairaudiently to any kind of spirit (the memories of the associated traumas give me a kind of anxiety--obviously a kind of 'Core Image' attachment that needs working on).

But I began to feel some kind of positive energy and heard a faint very slowly spoken voice that "felt" (it's hard to describe) ok. Plus various warm energy feelings in various places. So I asked it if it was the Khodam and I think it said yes (like I say it was very faint at first, especially because I wouldnt open up to it). I explained the situation of why I don't trust spirits etc and had a short conversation I won't go into (I was told things like "God loves you" etc.) along with very intense, but gentle, all over body tingling rushes. I then had what felt like a healing session done on me (I could feel very warm energy at my feet) and could again feel some kind of energy blob around my nose/nose cavity that was perhaps slightly throbbing and felt like the Khodam was trying to 'squeeze' it out. But as I relaxed this time I could feel that this blob of energy wasn't just around my nose. It was as though I was having revealed to me where else it was etc.

There is a line/cord of 'energy' going from my nose, nose cavity, down through the roof of my mouth to the back of my throat and out through the back of my neck (I have had a lump on the back of my neck for as long as I can remember). There also felt like connecting cords that led to my inner ears either side. I've attempted to draw what I felt and where (see link) with the yellow spots being the areas I felt most active (the one at the back of throat is around where I had been getting pin prick sensations.)
edit: The cord going to the back of my throat perhaps goes down to my throat chakra as I feel some kind of energy there at the front my neck also (where I have a small pink mole with a hair growing out of it).  It kind of feels like there is a tube pushed up my nose coming out at the back of, and down, my throat (as well as out through the back of my neck). And the point at the nose/cavity is slightly larger.

http://www.angelfire.com/me/kabakhu23/stuff.html

I have felt energy sensations in my nose cavity and  inner ears b4 but hadn't realized there was a line/cord connecting them until last night. I get a constant tinnitus white-noise buzzing energy sound in my ears that I feel is related to the attachment points there. So I've noted all that ready to work on it.

So then me and the "Khodam" (I'm still not 100% sure it was that that I contacted) said "goodnite". And that's it so far.
Oh! I told it perhaps it might be better to try and meet it Astrally or in a Dream and if it could help me get OOBE... it seemed to say yes...  and as I was falling asleep (I was quite tired) I "fell" asleep then a split-second later all of a sudden fully awake again... and not tired. Not quite sure what that was.

Demons dont send pain your way simply because they hate you or you have something they want.

Sure they do, they want to feed off your energy.

Paranoid dillusions are not somthing that should apply to the relationship between spirits and people.

Someone suffering a possession isn't having a paranoid delusion, although having a spirit possession problem can sometimes cause them.

9 Times out of 10 negs are self-induced and are not from outside sources is the point I am trying to make.

Well, this is a big debate amongst occultists about what exactly spirits are, let alone what "negs" are (thoughtforms, demons, astral shells, "astral wildlife", lost souls etc). There is the "It's all in your mind" crowd with a belief similar to yours and there is the other belief that spirits are not "just in your head" but actually have separate existences. I lean toward the latter. I certainly don't think 9/10 negs are "self-induced" delusions.

Again, and please don't take it personally, but that is the kind of belief a neg would want one to have so that instead of seeing an exorcist you see a shrink and take pills that have no effect on negs, and may even make things worse if the pills make the person into a zombie and therefore easy prey to negs (disclaimer: I am in no way saying people should not see a shrink or stop taking medication if that is what is recommended, or that all mental illnesses are neg-related. -- What a tricky situation eh?).

Much better than nothing IMO

Oh yes, I agree. And you are lucky you were able to do it for yourself. I only mentioned it in case anyone reading got the impression that exorcisms are painful.

Yes and no. Your comment about me as a neg

Ah, a misunderstanding. I didn't say that you was a neg, I said that what you said sounds like something a neg would say. It was just an example.

Yes I agree the issue with the Zetas does concern me. However Negs do not want to be know, not because of some global plot,

Who mentioned global plots?

but purely because they are cowards.

I totally agree. They can also be very cunning though.

Their pride betrays them and they claim "all your base are belong to us" in an attempt to scare people into thinking that they have power in this world, when they clearly do not.

Well, if someone has a neg attached and doesn't know it then the neg obviously has an advantage in those cases. Which is again why they don't wish to be exposed.

Fear should never be shown around a neg, they have come up with pretty ingenous ways to convert that nervous energy for their own purposes.

Agreed.

Simply stand up to them and call them for what they are: "cowards, liars, bullies, and thugs" They have NO power here in this world...absolutly none unless you surrender it to them

Someone with a neg problem that doesn't know they have a neg problem, or someone who knows but doesn't know how to get rid of them, hasn't exactly "surrendered" power to them, they just lack knowledge that negs don't want people to know.

Sentential:
"BAH...be a real man and do it yourself Laughing Suuuure its a little painful, but hey pain is only temporary "

Just an additional comment: Exorcisms are not normally painful if done correctly. Mine was extremely relaxing with no pain whatsoever.

No it wasn't because of those things. There are two examples in that article. The first guy is a Rasta that is "crazy" (walks around shouting at himself--or perhaps the 'voices' he hears) who absolutely refused to take a shower. The second guy was actually afraid of water.

Robert Bruce has said somewhere that people with bad neg problems will tend not to bathe very often. It is probably the negs that influence this because the water somehow affects the negs, and they don't want their host bathing etc. So the above examples could be (not definitely) a sign of neg trouble.

I know someone who has a neg problem and she gets anxiety attacks about getting in the shower, which is probably why she doesn't bathe very much. It probably isn't her anxiety she is feeling but the neg's, or the neg is causing it to influence her not to bathe.

If I am having neg trouble around me I jump in the shower or bath (I sprinkle sulphur into the bath too) and the neg trouble reduces drastically.

I think people blow this issue of "possesion" way out of proportion. Only maybe .0001% of the entire population actually ever becomes "possessed" in the litereral sense.

I think it depends on your idea of what a "possession" is supposed to be like and whether you believe in Hollywood films or not. If a spirit is in your aura/body and is able to influence your thoughts and actions (but not specifically your body) what would you call it? And this happens to people without them even knowing they have a neg problem.

I think they are looking for ways to find exsuces to why their lives are so sad / pathetic / lonely

Sounds like something a neg would say. And believe me, i know a lot about negs and how they work and the kinds of things they say. You see, negs very much want people to believe they don't exist and/or that their interference with humans is very rare. Humanity's ignorance of negs kind of empowers the negs because if you don't know there is a problem you're not going to try to do anything about it. And that's how negs like it and want it to stay that way. And at times they will even pretend to be "Spiritual Masters" (or whatever their target will believe most) in order to propagate disinformation about themselves. The Zeta are a prime example.

SD:

"My cases are quite private, you know that. If you want to hear thier stories on how I work go to GOM and ask. (You are still a moderator BTW, were waiting for you to come back.) Frankly, though, I wonder if you did the same check on this guy, cuase I don't think from your "I hope this works" that you did."

When I said feedback, I meant off those you have helped. Please don't take it as though it's an insult, it wasn't meant to be. I've visited Peter before in 1997 so know what he can do. And the 'seeds of doubt' are sowed by the entities. i.e. If you don't think it will work then perhaps you won't bother trying it.

"The reason for this is that if I charged, some people WOULD NOT GET HELP. A good amount of my cases don't have a dollar to thier name."

Well good for you if that is what you choose to do. One can still do that and charge normally for those who can pay. I feel that the paying part helps because it shows how much that person wants that healing.

BTW, my Angelic Khodam took 41 days to make, hence the price. It is made by, and linked to, five different Angels for protection, spiritual growth, magikal empowerment, enforcement of my will and material assistance.
The ritual I will be doing bonds it to me and blends it into me so it is always there when needed (by drinking part of it as well as specially prepared capsules with powders and magic script in them, plus specially charged seeds and water). Kind of like a spirit guide, except a designer one that has been invoked for specific purposes. Then one repeats its mantra daily to strengthen it etc and get to know it/work with it. It can be used to assist in the healing and exorcism of others.

Sounds too good to be true doesn't it? Well, i'll let you know.  

Li Yun:
"what felt like a muscle spasm by the upper thigh,"

Had you felt anything like this before you visited him? And yes, I was getting spasms, tingling rushes, cold and warm etc. I could also hear them as I am Clairaudient, and they didn't sound too happy about being kicked out of my aura (losing their food source). But as he worked away on the healing it got quieter and quieter as they left.  It was a very very relaxing experience.

Andromache:
"I think the problem with spending money is that there are many frauds and inepts..."

Yes, very true. Which is why feedback is important. And perhaps making a list of those who one feels are genuine. It comes down to trial and error at times but once you find the Real Thing(tm) then you can pass the info onto others needing similar help.

" Is a person's life worth turning away simply because they lack the funds? "

I don't think most healers would do that, including the guy I visited. I paid because I could. Besides, what I paid for are specialist items that take time to make, the healing session was free.

Sentential:
"BAH...be a real man and do it yourself Laughing Suuuure its a little painful, but hey pain is only temporary "

Interesting comment as I do still have to do some of it myself using the aid of my Khodam. I had at the time wanted him to do it all for me but it is probably wiser this way.

Chimerae:
Excellent post!

Well I'm back. Let me just say first that the exorcism and healing session was free but I paid for the other items. The first time I saw him in 1997 I had a healing exorcism done for £20 and feel that anyone could be able to raise that amount, working or not (I wasn't working).

The healing session was really quite something and Peter is definitely channelling some very strong energies. He spent most the time with hands either side my head but I could also feel 'something' healing from my feet (very warm soft gentle energy). The entities didn't like what was going on at all, saying things such as "You bastard" etc. He was telling me what was happening as he did it. At first he flung one or two "Lower Astral" types (I will ask him more about this via email, I was so zoned out/ultra relaxed after the healing I couldn't talk much or think of what to ask) out of my aura but they kept jumping back in through the holes in my aura. So he then worked on patching my aura up first etc then 'squeezed' these entities out through one last hole (or something like that.)

I could feel them running around my body (well, it kind feels like outside your body maybe an inch above skin) as though being chased, it was very interesting. On my head I knew there was one entity because I had felt it there for a while (behind nose in nasal cavity, plus pin pricks at back of throat). And I could literally feel some kind of 'energy blob' being pushed out of my head by the area of my nose. He then corrected something in my aura and I was to sit upand let it work etc. I could feel most had gone but could still feel one left. Peter said the Khodam would be able to deal with that so we left it at that.

I have a small ritual I have to do with this Khodam to bind it to me that I was too tired to do when I got home. But I was practicing the mantra for it while in bed and could feel a very warm healing energy to the left side of my groin/thigh where I have some sort of wart. And fell asleep like that.

So next up is the Khodam ritual and to see if it gets rid of this entity that is left.

Now you tell me, I'm off in 20 minutes. And I disagree about charging (even though I'm the one paying!) because even doctors earn a living so why not doctors of the spiritual kind? If he had to have a normal job to support his family he wouldn't have as much time helping others.

btw regarding your help, have you stopped darknights problems? Or got any feedback I can read for cases you've worked on? It's just that if you can do this sort of stuff then I'll remember you next time I come across someone needing help.

Walk in Beauty

McA

Because I still have ongoing entity problems that seem to have been attached for some time. I found this Shaman that seems to really know what he's talking about:

http://www.azizshamanism.com/

I have ordered a full shamanic blackthorn bead necklace at £100 and he has also made me what is called an Angelic Khodam for extra strong protection, amongst other things, at £300. (See his "Magickal Items" on his website). Info about Khodams here:

http://www.indotalisman.com/Khodam.html

He's also going to scan my aura for attached spirits and remove them (exorcism). The tree spirits in the Shamanic necklace, and the Angelic Khodam, are there as kind of personal psychic body guards to stop any spirits re-attaching and block any further psychic-attacks.

If I'm going for it I may as well get the full treatment.  

It is a 4 and 1/2 hour journey either way costing me about £80, which leaves me about £10 to my name for 2 weeks. It's a bit of a gamble spending all the cash I have on this but I need to at least give this a shot to see if it works. I may be too tired to report back by the time I get home tonight, but will certainly do so tomorrow. Wish me luck.