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Messages - GrumpyRabbit

#51
Thank you for all this wonderful information, Lumaza! The idea of an anchor/repeatable experience is pretty fundamental in shamanism, and I've been struggling to get any consistency in my AP experiences and what (or, who!) I encounter there. This is a timely reminder for me on things I have so much work to do on!
#52
I'm a little behind, so here are three different recent days!


5 May 2021

???

Jumble experiences this morning, possibly just weird lucid dreams, or some kind of combination, I'm not sure. What I do know is that I was at the very least lucid and *trying* to project. These are the only things I can remember:

Having some experience and then asking, "What was the place I was?"

I heard the reply, from somewhere (didn't actually see anyone, it was just a response): "$hitty sleep."

Like, OK, is that your cute way of telling me that I wasn't actually projecting? This voice literally said "$hitty" sleep!

At some other point, I once again was asking about my mission, and was told: "Who are you to peek? To know the good you have to do, without having good to do it with?"

As in, you don't get to know right now, you have to have a certain thing inside you to "earn" the knowledge of your mission; you can't know your mission until you have what it takes to actually do it; until then, you don't get to know.

And I'm like, yeah well maybe if I know what I have to do that might help me get to the point where I can do it. Kinda helps to have an endpoint in sight so you know what you have to work towards.

Then, another set of strange call and response from the disembodied voice in the dark:

"Take me to the memory of X" - I don't remember what it was. There had been some strange experience/information about the importance of memories, processing memories, remembering certain things, etc.

Reply: "You should go to the memory of Y"  - some other thing.

"Who is that?" I asked of this disembodied voice.

Reply: "Your highest self."

Well, that's helpful! "Then take me to my highest self!" I said excitedly.

Reply: "That's not going to work."

Srsly?!?! My highest self is a smart butt.

"Take me to my highest self anyway!!" I insisted. I don't think I actually got there, that's all I remember.


7 May 2021

???

Another spate of jumble experiences this morning. Something about my me being "really" a bobcat inside, my helper seemed to be named "Eric", and more about the importance of memories, and remembering certain things. Something about it being important for me to remember when one of my baby teeth was knocked out (false, this never actually happened); something that looked like a scene, as I was shown, on a plantation, where there were slaves being cruelly overworked (what does this have to do with anything??). Then at some point "Eric" seemed to tell me that I approach things/life with happiness. I talked to this helper about how I don't know how long I'm going to be able to "stay", because at some point I can't keep the focus and I wind up back in my body. Then, my vision started to go. So then he injected something into the right side of my head (probably around my right temple), and I felt it there as well as in my right ankle. That was it, I woke up.


8 May 2021

Was having a dream, became lucid. As soon as I did, I decided to try to project. Asked to be taken to my spirit guides.

Felt myself start to turn/move in space. Usually during the transit I keep my eyes closed. But this time I started to peek my eyes open. At first, in the tiny bit one of my "eyes" was opened, I saw a massive, unhuman eye looking right back at me, right in front of my face. I opened my eyes fully and saw a funny little head. Definitely not human. The eyes were massive, skin pale. Small little thing (there were possibly two of them, I held one's hand), like imagine something 18 inches tall. I was a bit startled by their appearance by told myself whatever they were, they were clearly helping me, and I said thank you to them (or it, if it was just one, not sure).

I was taken to a room in a house, it seemed. Furnished, homey. The room was empty. This was a room to wait in. I was asked, next time please make an appointment (if I want to see my spirit guides).

I have to...MAKE AN APPOINTMENT?! I thought. What's all this? I've never been asked to make an appointment before...

Anyway, they/it told me the way to make an appointment was to write the appointment request on a piece of cardboard. The little creature gave me a piece of paper with examples of requests written in a few different languages/alphabets. None were recognizable. The little creature left.

Eventually, the room began to fill up with people - other people who were waiting. Probably already had appointments, ha! I saw a couple, Asian, but who seemed to be American, husband and wife. I asked them if they could translate/explain the written request system, that this was my first time there.

They tried explaining but it was hard to hear/understand. Soon enough, multiple people waiting in the room tried explaining it to me, but I couldn't hear/understand.

Then, an employee of some sort, who also looked Asian, came in, and offered me something from a tray. I was clearly supposed to take one and do something with it. The things on the tray looked hot/warm and steaming. I couldn't tell if it was one of those rolled moist towelettes you're supposed to clean your hands with, or some sort of edible noodle!

Again, I explained that this was my first time, and told him I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do. It seemed clear this was something I had to do before being admitted to see my spirit guides. He did explain but his voice was quiet and it was hard to hear him. Eventually, it seemed it was edible, I got the impression he wanted me to eat it, and that I was supposed to swallow the entire piece in one gulp. Like just open your throat and down it all at once (rather than chewing it up).

I was still a little flustered/nervous, because I didn't really hear the instructions, and I was afraid I'd mess up/do it wrong. I didn't want to make a mistake.

But, I opened my mouth to swallow it down, and as I started to do that I woke up.
#53
(fascinating, towards the very end he casually mentions soul-part retrieval!)
#54
Thank you for the link to the talks, Lumaza!
#55
Thanks, Nameless =) I appreciate that!
#56
Huh? What do you mean the water "died"?
#57
Quote from: Nameless on April 24, 2021, 10:58:13

Hesitantly later I did the opposite and I'll never do that again. Water is a miracle fluid. I believe that and our thoughts are just as fluid. Below is a link to a video I think you all might find interesting.


Do you mean you tried to imbue "bad" thoughts into water and you drank it? Whahappen??
#58
Thanks, EV! Those books are on my must-read list, and I admit I'm a little chomping at the bit to read them, but I've been restraining myself. I feel like I need a better foundation or experiential "lay of the land" first; I'm soooo itching to get them, but if I have a certain experience *after* I read them, then I'll always have to wonder whether it was just my own subconscious "noise".

Odd, how the idea of a "mission", which is so fundamental for each one of us, seems to be something They are reluctant to just tell us!
#59
Strange, fragmented experiences this morning that I can hardly even organize/write about.

I dreamt that I was sleeping somewhere, projected from there. I wonder whether I actually projected or if this was still "just a dream". There was someone that looked like a "fairy godmother" character. I asked her if she knows what my mission is and she said yes - I told her that no one will tell me what my mission is even tho I keep asking. She said, "Don't beg for food" and then something like, "You need to come in" or "You need to go thru the door" - something like that. I asked her to tell me more information about things, but she said I wouldn't remember. This is not the first time I've been told that I wouldn't remember something, so they didn't even try telling me.

At the time, I interpreted this to mean something like, stop begging us to give you the answer; step into it/take it/go there before you "know". Not sure, it was a vague impression.

I was in and out multiple times, and at one point I had an experience where someone, a woman (not the 'fairy godmother') told me that my "real name" is Remnis. I "wrote it down" multiple times in the NP to make sure I would remember, and googled it just now. Remnis is the name of a FICTIONAL CHARACTER from Dungeons and Dragons (lord of the eagles!). I've never even played Dungeons and Dragons! I have no idea how I would know this name, but also, I am obviously not a fictional character lol

The extra annoying thing is that I've been told my "real name/soul's name" from three different sources and they're all different. This does make me question the validity of some NP stuff, because the information all conflicts. In one of my first out of body experiences almost a year ago, I was told that the name of my soul is "Amorphis". A shaman/channeler/energy worker (in real life) told me my name involved Hebrew letters that would transliterate to something like "Anella" (messenger of god; light). Conflicting information doesn't inspire confidence =(
#60
I don't think I've "spoken" another language while out, but I've heard words/phrases in other languages. I got "kokostika" which I THINK is Latvian (anyone here know Latvian?  :lol:). Once I got "keva," which turns out to mean a "fixed ritual" in Judaism. I got something that seemed German, once, but I don't think it was a real word.
#61
Quote from: EscapeVelocity on April 24, 2021, 01:32:59

moving into much higher Focus levels such as F22, 23,24,25,26 and 27 (the Park).



Wow, what a cool conversation. I've tried a few times to understand what the Focus levels are about and how to differentiate between them but can't really wrap my head around it. Pretty quickly I decided that was one conversation I was going to sit out!

I recently re-read Monroe's first book, Journeys Out of the Body, and toward the end of the book he talks about how his NP experiences, and how it all physically felt for his body, changed over the years. He divided it into three stages, I think - the early years, middle, and later (of course, "later" years was still relatively early if you consider this was only his first book!). It was pretty spiffy to go back and read his book again after almost a year of having OBEs myself. I could see some similarity in that natural (or at least unintentional) shift from "classic" exit to phasing. I gotta admit, tho, I really wish the classic exits would come back for me! The shift happened pretty fast and I just wasn't ready to say goodbye to those experiences yet. Been trying to get them back but no dice yet.

The TMI courses sound really amazing. Altho pricey, not for the faint of pocketbook! Maybe one day =) I kinda like that they don't "prime" you to expect certain things, that way, if those things happen to you it's easier to accept that they're "really happening" and not just the power of suggestion.
#62
Really interesting threat, ya'll. I am also curious if there's still any thing any branch of the military is doing w/r/t OBEs and whathaveyou. Doubt they'd tell us if they were!

But, along the lines of the 'conspiracy' this Jay person thinks: if TMI were purposefully trying to not publicly teach "exiting" because the military said not to, wouldn't there be some kinda governmental crackdown on public forums like the Pulse? There are so many places people can learn how to do it, and I'd wager TMI is just a teeny tiny fraction of a sliver of where people go to learn. Most get books and read about it online. Intentionally "shutting down" the "exit education" of TMI would be like the least efficient way to keep that information from the masses! LOL
#63
Cool! Yes I remember reading about shineling's awesome dragon-riding bonanza. You rode a dragon too? I sometimes fancifully think of it as an "energy cloud" when these sorts of synchronicity NP experiences happen. Like, oh, the same energy cloud musta been passing over both of our heads at the same time, haha! But in all seriousness, I think if we believe at all, even remotely, that there is a shared non-physical reality, then there must be features/entities that more of us can experience at the same time (or, close to the same time). Here's a fun one: a year ago or so I was in a shaman class and the other student and I laid on the floor with our heads pointed together, doing our own separate journeys. We were supposed to find an animal to shapeshift into. The first thing I encountered was a massive green python. It definitely seemed "there" and not my imagination. I even tried shapeshifting into it for a bit, but it was kinda a "meh" experience and just didn't feel "right". Didn't feel like it was "my" animal" I was supposed to work with right then. So I left and kept looking. Anyway, after we're done and time to share our respective experiences. The other student said her animal that she shapeshifted into was -- you guessed it -- a massive green python. We totally both saw the same entity, and somehow I knew it wasn't there "for me". Because it was there for her! Don't think it's a coincidence - what would be the odds of that? So I do think that sorta thing does indeed happen =)
#64
Strange! I had a spew of experiences this morning (honestly too scattered to even write a post about) but it involved seeing parts of my body were made of wires and robot-like things, and I was basically being chased and wanting to hide from my pursuers because they wanted to do things like twist nail screws into my head (like in my temples) to get my memories or something. Just lots of things that would involve yet more pain. Not sure what's up with this robot theme  :? :? :?
#65
Spectacular! As soon as you mentioned a dragon I was hoping there'd be a ride on it like in the Neverending Story or something. You didn't disappoint!  :-D
#66
Wow, I'm super late to the party when it comes to this thread (and this entire category on the forum), but for anyone who happens to stumble back here, be it Urshebear or another:

If you have been through emotional, physical, or sexual trauma, I highly recommend two kinds of therapeutic modalities: EMDR and/or Somatic Experiencing. EMDR involves bilateral stimulation to help your limbic system process past trauma. It's highly validated in studies, and is used a lot with veterans (for instance). Somatic Experiencing is a great complementary modality to EMDR, and is a body-oriented approach that further helps release any trauma stored in the body. Both of these modalities are well-studied and proven over and over to be very effective for trauma. Plain 'ol talk therapy is generally proven to be ineffective, or outright re-traumatizing. I hope these resources might help anyone who is in need!
#67
Welcome to Healing discussions! / Re: A Healing
April 18, 2021, 21:48:39
What a beautiful experience you had! I'm so glad for you. How have you felt since? I have lots of health issues myself and have tried darn near everything (including asking repeatedly for healing, trying to do it myself, etc). No dice so far, but if I were to lose hope I think I'd go crazy, so I keep hoping anyway that one day things will be different <3
#68
Came across this fascinating and challenging article in Harper's:

https://harpers.org/archive/2021/04/lost-in-thought-psychological-risks-of-meditation/

The entire time I read it, I was thinking back to having read the book "Spiritual Emergency" last year. The book talks about the line between psychosis and a "spiritual crisis", and how something spiritual could be confused with a mental health emergency. I thought perhaps by the end of the article I'd be able to "figure out" what was "really" going on, but the article ended and I felt well and truly gutted. It seemed truly ambiguous. Not whether or not these effects really happen to people (obviously the research shows we have to accept that it does), but rather how it happens, why, and what does it really mean?

Wondering if anyone has any thoughts.
#69
I've been thinking more about those times we dream that we're laying down/sleeping. One of the last things that happened to me (as I posted about) was seeing a man in my dream approach and stand next to my bed, and trying to open my "dream eyes" and accidentally opening my *actual* eyes and then seeing an actual shadowy figure next to my real bed - right where the man was standing in my dream! I started thinking about how there have been other times I've had those weird dreams of myself sleeping. Certainly, seeing a figure in a dream (of myself laying down and trying to sleep) and then seeing an *actual figure* in my room suggests even more that there's some relationship between what we dream and other NP entities that we encounter in that state. So when you're dreaming that you were sleeping in your bedroom, maybe you were in a lower-state-of-awareness OBE/NP experience - like, sorta hovering right where your physical body was - so that's why your perception out of body was of yourself "sleeping". Then the plants you saw in the dream or NP or whatever it was, is a symbolic representation of something you encountered =) I think? Not sure if I'm making sense! Anyway, I was glad to read this experience you just posted because it's the sort of thing I've been turning over in my brain ever since that similar thing happened to me!
#70
I wish, T-Man, no CliffsNotes for poor 'ole me =(
#71
10 April 2021

???

I'm really not sure what all this was. Some degree/combo of lucid dreaming and projection, I think.

First experience:

Strange dreams, I think. I was dreaming that I was asleep in a bed, and some others were making some annoying noise. A man approached my bed, and while I was awake they thought I was asleep. I decided to pretend I was just waking up, hoping that they'd realize they were too loud. But instead of opening my eyes in my dream, I *actually* opened my eyes - my physical body. And...THERE WAS SOMETHING STANDING NEXT TO MY BED in the exact same spot as the man in my dream - like, literally. It was like a shadowy form, and I jolted and gasped, thinking it was an actual human in my room, maybe a burglar (it was still dark out, so there wasn't much light available). Upon my wide-eyed, scared stare and gasp, the shadowy figure took one slow step backwards, and slowly dissipated.

::stares::  :? :-o


Second experience:

There was a woman who was doing something surgical to my brain. My skull was open and my brain was being directly worked with. I felt a LOT of uncomfortable pressure in my brain! It did hurt, but at least not as bad as some of my other pain OBE experiences.

Strangely, the wall opposite of me where this was happening was a mirror. I looked at the reflection of myself in the mirror and I didn't see my head's top-of-skull surgically removed, instead I had no head at all! Well, at least in the reflection, of course, as I could still feel everything that was going on.

I asked, as you can imagine, what the point of this procedure was, and naturally could not remember the explanation. I think after this was over (timeline gets fuzzy) I said that what I really want is to be healed, for my illness to be taken away. The woman told me to take the #9 cupcake from the tray (which had other cupcakes with other numbers on top of their icing), and eat it when I get to the platform. Like, some sort of transportation platform, like a train.

Some dude with brown hair took me (and my cupcake I was holding) to the "platform" but instead of train platform it looked like we were outside an airport, like you know where the public transit/buses are. I was talking to him, asking if the cupcake would really heal me of my chronic illness. He said a lot but I don't remember.

Then, I saw the woman surgeon again. I talked to her, and asked her about whether the cupcake would cure me. Her answer surprised me as it seemed that the cupcake had zilch to do with any physical healing! She said, "It's enough to believe in the way men love you."

I mean, huh? OK. I was totally caught off guard but it seemed like a sweet sentiment so I paused, thought, and said, "That's beautiful."

Anyway, I ate the whole cupcake! I COULD taste it but it was kinda like mildly cupcake cardboard. I made a joke to the guy, saying that food in the NP tastes like the worst stale vegan gluten-free food you've ever had! There was some bits of cupcake and icing left on my fingers, and he licked it off.

Back to body, took notes.


Third experience:

Surgery lady again. This time she wanted my DNA for some reason! Like, NO, surgery lady. No.

I didn't want to do that, so I got her to agree to explain everything to me first. Well, I was too trusting I guess, because she tricked me. Instead of explaining, she started coming at me with some sort of syringe. I thought "HOME!!" and of my physical body and basically got myself back lickety-split, right as she was approaching me with some sort of syringe device to suck up my DNA.

Took notes.


Fourth experience:

Some sort of situation I didn't like, might have been a lucid dream, so to get out of it I decided to ask to see my higher self. I felt myself begin to float, and I felt various hands on me - not really carrying me per se, but just touching me. It wasn't like the scary "clutching hands" I've heard about, tho. It felt benign.

This time, my higher self looked like a woman. She did explain the significance of the "touching hands" but I can't remember. There was her, and a table where others sat, both men and women. At least two of them I felt like I recognized and had seen them before. No idea how or where or when.

My "higher self" said to the others, that I came to them too late after I got the Death card (referring to tarot). As a consequence, when I pass them when I'm flying (and when they're flying, and I guess we fly by each other), some negative consequence could occur, but only when their own relationships with each other are collapsing.

None of that makes any sense to me, but OK.

She put me in some sort of trance-like state. It was a little uncomfortable, because there was something happening either physically or energetically. Tiny, glass-like beads/spheres came out of the tip of my tongue. She took the glass beads and one by one gave them to each of the others who had been sitting at the table. This was important for them to get, to I think rectify whatever the situation was (in terms of me arriving to them "too late").

One of the guys at the table was referred to as my "brother", and seemed to have a name like Colum (like Scottish, Colm). There was talk of his and my "mother". My higher self also then injected something into my arm, something for "durability" of my out of body experiences. I had asked for help so that I can stay out longer and don't fade away so quickly.

I asked if if we all have particular missions that were here to do, and she said yes (whereas, in one of this mornings earlier experiences that I can't even remember, I was told no, we don't have missions, we only have "jobs", and we choose the "jobs" ourselves and they can be long-term or very short-term jobs, either important or not). But now I was being told yes - so I was told two contradictory things by different beings/entities in the span of a single morning!

I feel like there was more, but I don't remember. I was back and took notes.


Lastly:

Not sure what sort of experience I was having, but I felt someone tap my right thigh and ask my name questioningly, and I immediately awoke with a start.
#72
These are such cool stories! The first time I know this happened to me was when I was either 17 or 18. This was the late 90s, and the wild west of everyday folks having personal computers and the internet in their homes. There was some sort of "esoteric" type website that I became pretty obsessed with. I can't remember the name of it, but it was all about psychic and paranormal stuff, energy work, astral projection, etc. I read all sorts of things about using your "energy arms" to pull energy into your body. On this one occasion I was doing whatever "energy work/meditation" I had learned on the website, and essentially --and somewhat accidentally-- lurched myself up out of my body. I basically threw my arms out, trying to hug someone I really missed, and next thing I know, I turn my head to the side and notice I'm floating slowly upwards. I was very calm and everything felt so peaceful. I was like, "Oh, I'm out of my body right now", like, ho hum, very mundane observation. I hadn't been technically *trying* to leave my body at that point, but in retrospect I had obviously achieved The State, unbeknownst to me, and wound up throwing my energy arms out (again, unbeknownst to me!) and that's what did it. I floated slowly up and looked back up to the ceiling - now it was like my nose was up against the ceiling of my room. Then it looked as if there were words carved into my ceiling - the message read, "love is death". Well, that was a little scary, and I started thinking, Oh no, what if I float up forever and go into outerspace and I can't breathe and I get lost and never make it back to my body! So I did what I had remembered reading on the website to get back to my body: I thought of my body and thought the word "home!" over and over. Then just like that, i was back. It felt just like waking up from sleep. I dismissed the entire experience as having all been just a dream. Too bad, if I had been keeping up the practice since then I'd be a total expert by now!!
#73
I came across this citation on Robert Monroe's Wikipedia entry, and was excited to read the actual article - but Google is showing me no hits!! Anyone else have better luck?? No matter how I search for it, I can't find it =(

Bob Ortega, "Research institute shows people a way out of their bodies", The Wall Street Journal, September 20, 1994, pp. A1, A8.

#74
Cool experiences! Especially because you were tipped off ahead of time that this would all be about learning about the different environment. I wish I got clear, handy explanatory details like that !LOL

As Nameless says, thinking you're in the physical/awake and realizing you're not is both funny and sometimes frustrating. So many times, I've "taken notes" on my experience, like, oooo I gotta write down what just happened before I forget, and I think I'm really writing it down, then I really wake up and my notepad is empty, untouched. It's a bummer every time =(

I look forward to seeing what education comes next for you!
#75
Lumaza, OHH, I see what you were trying to say now. Thanks for clarifying! Yes I'm a little familiar with the idea of brainwaves, and how trance happens in Theta. Shamanic drumming is at the theta frequency (not coincidentally =)