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The onion rocks! Here's an article about joining the reptilian alien race (I posted this a few years ago when there was a huge increase in posts about reptilian aliens on the AP):

http://www.theonion.com/articles/my-bloodline-would-mix-well-with-that-of-an-advanc,11259/

My Bloodline Would Mix Well With That Of An Advanced Reptilian Race

By Edwin F. Blakely
September 27, 2006 | ISSUE 42•39
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I guess you could say I've always been a status-conscious person. But I'm not one of these "to the manor born" types who, despite looking and talking like a regular human being, is actually one of an ancient race of lizard aliens residing on another plane of reality who have secretly controlled mankind since the dawn of time. However, that doesn't mean I can't still seek to improve my standing in the New World Order. Warm-blooded though I may be, I remain a viable candidate, and I firmly believe that, given the chance, my particular DNA would mix well with that of an advanced reptilian species bent on subsuming humans to its unknowable will.

So I have ambition—why shouldn't I? The fact that I come from a long line of humans descended from higher apes shouldn't automatically preclude me from promotion within the hidden society that rules the Earth. My parents may have been homo sapiens, but that doesn't mean I don't want better for my children, and their children. And their children's reptilian–human children. After all, that's what America is all about.

I can trace my family tree back past the Mayflower to the reign of the hybrid reptoid female known to human annals as "Queen Elizabeth." It's a fairly impressive genetic legacy, yet I will always be looked down upon as "inferior" by those who slither across the real corridors of power.

Why? Because my bloodline—unlike that of the Bushes, Clintons, Rockefellers, and others whose names, were they revealed, would astound you—has never entered a shape-shifting, bloodsucking union with those shadowy reptile overlords. But I have plans for me and mine beyond mammalian servitude. The Blakely name deserves better!

I'm well aware that this is an honor few can expect to achieve. Finding a suitable mate with whom to start interbreeding among the lizard-men would undoubtedly be a step up the interdimensional social ladder for my family. And I know for a fact that my chromosomes are up to the task.

Just take a look at my pedigree: My father was a very successful banker. My grandmother was a musician of some note who wrote three piano concertos that are still performed today. And my great-great-uncle Tobias, God rest his monkey soul, invented a new type of industrial solvent, earning a small fortune at the turn of the 20th century, and solidifying our reputation as persons of significance. True, it wasn't a mind-control ray, or a high-energy anti-gravity propulsion device, but, considering that he lacked the inherent advantage of a hyper-advanced, overly rational, emotionless reptile brain, that's quite an accomplishment.

No doubt there are many people, descended from the vastly inferior genetic pool of primates, who would be envious of my standing in life. But power, wealth, and luxury are as nothing to me when I think of the shape-shifting reptile nobility who operate behind the scenes, pulling the strings, directing the human race hither and thither according to designs and calculations beyond our ken.

I want my children to be part of that. I want my DNA to be fused with the ruling cold-blooded super-race. Is that so wrong? For a man to want a better life for his offspring?

They say it's a dog-eat-dog world out there. But I know it's actually a lizard-alien-eat-human-baby world, and I'm prepared to do whatever it takes to be part of their invisible ranks. It may not be easy, but sacrifices must be made to get what you want, and social standing comes first, even if must be earned by drinking the blood of infants.

I only hope the power players in the Draconian Galaxy see my merit, and accept me. I would do your lizard-people proud.

...I want to be happy, that's my only goal, my only wish, the only thing I'm pursuing every single day, but sadly, I think that there is no way to be happy on Earth, there are too much people, too much trouble, not enough space for everyone to realise each single dream. In the astral realms, just a single thought will change your world while here, a single thought is doing nothing and you have to lick people's as* for years to get what you want, it is so stupid, so unfair. On this earth you have to be mean to get what you want, you need to step over people and be a backstabber but quite franclky I dont want to deal with that and don't feel like I need to raise my voice to be heard or do anything else that requires too much effort on my part...it is just so ...stupid and evil!

You said, "I'm pursuing happiness everyday" and then followed it with "but I don't think it's possible". You have a lot of doubts and misconceptions about the world. Not that the world is problem-free, it's far from it, but don't you think your attitude influences your outlook?

By changing the way you think about things, you can change the way you perceive things, and when perception is more correct, the more you flow with life. If you go through life assuming it can only be unhappy and that you can't achieve what you want, that's exactly what you'll get. You're much more powerful and influential than what you know, you just have to find it and use it. Look inward for strength and happiness and then apply it to life around you. Not only will you find happiness, but you'll make others happy too.

Or don't, it's your life, your responsibility, and you're in charge.

I'm pretty sure all the ladies I dream of are constantly thinking about me. Even the famous ones I never met.

Use feeling... think about how it feels to already have it accomplished. Feeling is probably more important than just visualization when you're doing this kind of thing. Visualization won't have any affect if you don't "feel" it.

I've gotten a few e-mails recently with people asking me what I did for a living that allowed me to live a spiritual life, so I thought I would answer the question here as well.

1st off, I don't think it matters what you do, but I think it's important to do something you can enjoy. I work a regular 9-5, monday - friday, 40 hour work week, so it's nothing out of the ordinary.

I believe one of keys to living a spiritual life is discipline. I meditate every morning, and sometimes in the evening. It's not only the act of meditating, but putting myself in the correct mental state before starting my day, and carrying that into my day.

After meditating for several years, experience grows, and ways of thinking and perception changes. OBE'ing just for fun and flying around is one thing, but I don't think any of it is worth it if you're not having experiences that are opening your eyes and changing your being.

When that begins to happen, that's when your life changes, and being a spiritual person isn't something you just do with meditation and certain actions and attitudes, but every action and thought is influenced from what rises up inside you and guides you. Physical life becomes one big spiritual experience 24-7, even at work. Because it is, we just tend to not notice it.

And I do graphic design and engraving at an awards company.

My acid friends just became regular druggies, no inventions

I haven't needed an alarm clock in years (unless I'm in a weird time zone or hungover)

Here's another method: As you're going to sleep, imagine standing at a well and put a digital clock that shows the time you want to wake up in the bucket. Then lower the bucket down and watch the time descend into the darkness and fall asleep.

I have a distant relative in state government that wants to separate the penal system and have a separate court and rehabilitation for non-violent criminals/drug offenders, and make better attempts at rehabilitation for all criminals.

I saw a documentary recently about a meditation program that they had in an Alabama prison, and how much it had changed a good number of inmates over a few years, but then christians and religious right and the current priest in the prison began to put on the pressure and forced it shut-down. The cool thing was that several of the prisoners kept doing it on their own anyways.

I don't think that being able to OBE or have visions or even have precog experiences gives you more power, because I think everyone else has the same capabilities (in general, some have different predispositions than others), so if anyone really commits to try, they can either learn to OBE or LD, or even have other talents.

But now that I've said that I think that when you do have expanded-consciousness experiences you realize that reality is more than meets the eye, and you also realize the interconnectedness and magicality of everything- and this is a great feeling, for as long as it lasts.  Those that don't cultivate them miss out on that, but there is no way for me to know that they'll experience them anyway, making all of this speculation practically meaningless.
So, if I'm conceited and egotistical it's because it works for me (psychologically), not because I can OBE.

That's very well put

I also feel that it's mostly only worth sharing with people who are genuinely interested (which are rare, yet easy to spot and talk to when they come around). And if you're really living your life according to you're principals, you'll naturally begin to attract and affect those who are similar. Don't worry about the rest, they'll come around when it's their time.

Once during a mediation I relived a memory from childhood and smelled something that I had completely forgotten about. It was a "holy crap, I forgot about that" kind of thing.

Is the feeling I get how everyone else feels when they focus on their third eye?

When you talk about "opening your 3rd eye", what do you expect to happen?

I think you can find out much more than you already do and come to a completely different understanding of what death really is and have a different relationship to it. Fear of death is misunderstanding it.

"Life's a b!tch and then you die"

Well, I'm putting it extremely simplistically... the desire of western culture to "look good" at all times with our thin waste lines and such is a driving factor.

Simply put, as humans, we're not supposed to EVER be breathing by expanding our chests.  It's an inefficient way of doing it and is wrong... it's entirely "learned" through our crappy society.

http://www.stop-anxiety-attack-symptoms.com/breathing.html

Yeah, I know about breathing from your diaphragm, I'm just skeptical that not doing it is something we unconsciously pick up from society because we want to look more thin. Never heard that one before.

People who breath through their chest aren't breathing properly. It's a learned condition due to people afraid of being "fat".

Whaaaaaatttt?

I like reading it. Without people questioning us we don't question ourselves. I like understanding where others are coming from, even when I don't agree with them.

It flies when you're having fun and goes slow when you're watching the clock. And the older you get, the faster it goes.

I had a friend in high school named Eric and when I saw him years later everyone called him Boz. I said "you'll always be Eric to me", and when people hear me call him that they look at me funny, like I'm the weird one.

Wouldn't it be easier if you just had everyone in real life start calling you Xanth?

To add: It finds the path of least resistance. It's good to create conditions for it to flow into your life if you want it at a specific time. A little action can go a long way, rather than just waiting.

I think it's important to see both the big and little picture, not just choose one. There's a microcosm and a macrocosm, both are real. You have to find balance.

I watched this a while back and but don't remember much of it. I need to watch it again. Thanks for the link!

Sorry I haven't been active on here either guys. I'm too busy drinking and going to the beach! 

Hell yeah!

...Thomas Campbell shot himself in the foot...

Please don't tell me he shot off his big toe.

Pauli, I think most of us know that AP involves both subjective and objective experience, that one can seem like the other, and that a subjective experience can be turned into an objective one with some focus and control. So what are you trying to convince us of?