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This advice is just what I needed! But what does TMI stand for? What are Hemi-Sync sounds? So many things I don't know... That's why I keep coming back here! 

It's been quite some time since my last post. I was distracted by my studies and now the Coronavirus, so I have postponed my attempts at an OBE. But now the virus is getting worse.   So many are infected in the US... I am growing concerned for the high risk people in my life. I don't know what's going to happen. All I know is that I'm ready to try again. Now that I have something to actually be afraid of, you'd think this fear test wouldn't be an issue. I even have a new location I'm willing to try besides my bedroom. But besides that strange creature that keeps preventing me from having an experience, I am afraid my own body could interfere. Let's say I actually do manage to have an OBE and was also somehow able to pass my fear test. I get to where I want to be and am able to talk to those that I care about on the other side. But then a giant sneeze or hiccup could shatter that experience. Talk about a whole lot of effort for nothing. The body is ridiculous sometimes. It's more, shall we say, disruptive than the parabody. What can I do to bypass this issue? How do I guarantee my own body does not disrupt my experience? I'm sure there are things I could do in the physical, but what could I do in the astral to stop this from happening? Is there a way I could 'mute' communication between the parabody and body?

Hi everyone! I figured I would create an unrelated topic from my main current ones. This is because I wanted to talk about lucid dreaming (hopefully I won't have to deal with any fear tests while I lucid dream  ). I have been making steady progress on developing the necessary skills to preform an OBE, even though I haven't left my body yet. I feel like it's only a matter of time before I 'conquer' my fear test. But in the meantime, I hear lucid dreaming is an excellent way to 'train' the mind for an actual OBE into the Otherwhere. But of course, the lucid dream state is usually in Focus 2. For those of you who don't know, which I'm sure is only some of you, there are apparently 5 'layers' of consciousness that a human being can tap into when it comes to an OBE. Maybe there's even more, but I haven't read about those yet. Perhaps I will read something that was written by Robert Monroe (anyone got any recommendations)?

Anyway, the layers are as follows:

1. Real Time Zone -- This one is pretty self explanatory. It is what we experience all the time in the waking state within the physical realm.

2. Focus 1 -- This involves the unaware/semi aware and uncontrollable dream state, whether it be nightmares or more pleasant dreams. We cannot control what happens, much like in real life.

3. Focus 2 -- This is the lucid dream state. It's so fascinating because not only are you fully aware you are dreaming, but you can also control all of your actions. Masters of the lucid dream state can control their environment and 'put it in its place' if it gets out of control or turns into a nightmare. Less experienced lucid dreamers do not have full control over their circumstances. Even experienced ones can lose control from time to time. If you think about it, life is a little bit like being a less experienced lucid dreamer. We can control our environment to an extent, but it doesn't always do what we want. But we usually do have more control over our own actions.

4. Focus 3 -- This is apparently the real Astral Realm. You can enter it via a lucid dream, but you will need to master astral projection to do it. The core difference between this and Focus 2 is that it is a culmination of all of our individual consciousness, whereas Focus 2 and 1 is just an imaginary realm your mind created. It is a bubble of your own personal consciousness. In order for me to prove to myself that the Otherwhere actually exists, I'll need to enter Focus 3. This is also where I will get the opportunity to talk to those who have passed away, since I will not be talking to just my 'dream copy' of them. I have heard that some people got the proof they desired, but then stopped believing in the Otherwhere (or Astral Realm, whatever you want to call it) because it didn't seem real enough to them or maybe they thought about it and reconsidered its existence. I will need substantial proof, even if just subjective, if I wish to avoid this. Perhaps those people were never able to leave Focus 2 to begin with. Interestingly, I hear Focus 3 can be influenced by conscious thought from even the physical, and this makes sense if you think about it.

5. Focus 4 -- And lastly, this is the infinite source. All that ever was or will be exists here. All potential and current manifestations exist here. Everything from the physical is connected to here as well, along with the rest of reality as a whole. All universes/realities exist at once and every point in time is a simultaneous and beautiful expression. The very notion of time holds little to no meaning here. Even in Focus 3, time begins to lose its meaning, so you can only imagine how it is expressed here. Time is only a consequence of the physical and the limited perspectives it offers us. Without the processes of the physical, time holds little meaning (as far as I know). In Focus 4, apparently everything is pure bliss. The human brain can barely comprehend this 'Highest Realm'.

Many religions have different names for it such as Nirvana and Heaven. I'm not religious though, but it's neat to see it is acknowledged in different ways within different belief systems. If it exists, I have NO idea how one could possibly even get a glimpse or a small taste of it. But that's okay. For now, I will just keep my attention on Focus 2 and 3. They are extraordinary enough as is. Though, ostensibly, the Buddha has proven himself worthy to become a part of the infinite, and Buddhists are very much certain he is one with everything now! Perhaps one must die to get there, but even then you may just wind up in Focus 3 or get reincarnated without a choice in the matter depending on your actions in life. Because I have not proven to myself that even Focus 3 exists, I have no idea what happens after you die (for now).
--- ---

So back to the topic of lucid dreaming. Does anyone have any idea how I can pull this off and how I can use it to enter Focus 3? I will do my own research, but any advice would be much appreciated. Could you guys tell me about your experiences with lucid dreaming? Could you also tell me what the differences are between Focus 2 and 3 (how real/vivid they feel by comparison)? How can you tell the difference? Does it truly feel that real?

P.S. -- If there's any inaccuracies in this post, like if I got the meaning behind the 5 layers wrong or something please feel free to correct me. Constructive criticism is never a bad thing if applied properly.

Sorry for the rather late reply. I don't mind the change in topic. In fact, that's to be expected if I leave for a while. I just didn't have anything noteworthy to say for a bit of time. It's not that I didn't have any episodes, it's just that the event unfolded the same way as it always had. It's because of my fear. My fear has kept holding me back. However, I feel like I am making some progress now! Today I was less afraid. I was still scared, but he didn't have the same level of intensity for me. I don't know why. Perhaps it's because I am getting used to him. He just shows up so frequently. Sure, there are times where he seems to take some sort of 'break', but he still doesn't make it seem like he wants to stay away from me.

So you might me thinking, 'did I finally have the guts to just try and leave my body anyway?'. Yes... but here's the problem, I wasn't able to. I was paralyzed (as usual) and figured this was the perfect time to confront him in my astral form. But I couldn't produce anything. Then he began to make some sort of sucking noise (again, as usual) and I continued to try to leave my physical body. But nothing happened whatsoever. This is strange...

It seems when I voluntarily try to leave my body, I can't do anything. I have actually had 'close' involuntary experiences where I was about to leave my body, but then I went back in due to fear (this was before I really knew what astral projection was and it was before the 'creature'). So either this 'manifestation', 'dark entity', 'guardian', or whatever you want to call it is directly responsible for making it very difficult for me to leave, or I have some sort of hangup, which I know I don't have because the desire to leave and talk to those that have passed away is as strong within me as ever before. And fear is no longer a big issue for me (as far as I know anyway).

By the way, EscapeVelocity, I am very impressed that you can voluntarily induce an OBE, though perhaps this is a skill that other people on this site have as well (no duh ). Can you perhaps give me more details about this? Like, have you managed to do it while awake? I take it you actually managed to do it. I have attempted to have an OBE while awake many times, but to no avail. I did this to try and avoid the 'Dweller' and I have also tried having an experience in other rooms, not while 'fully awake' of course. However, I was taken by surprise because of the 'dog creature' and was jolted back into a fully awakened state. It will be some time before I get an opportunity to have an attempt in another room besides my own because some family members are visiting and pretty much every room is occupied. And since I can't do it while awake, I will not be attempting to do it outside in the woods that are near my house (too cold this time of year anyway).

I really do need to keep in mind that this 'Dweller' could just be an 'awake dream' and nothing more. However, he always seems so real to me as this haunting male entity. He has patterns in his behaviors and never speaks to me. And I've only ever seen him once. But these patterns seem slightly samey and rigid, almost like he's just a 'program/hallucination' created by my brain. If he ever becomes even more dynamic, then that doesn't prove anything. After all, the brain is capable of truly interesting things. If he is merely a concoction, then this gives me the power to not be afraid of him anymore, even if he doesn't want to go away. Because it's all in my mind.

I have also tried voluntarily inducing an experience in my room by meditating myself into a 'semi-awake' state that ordinarily only happens when I wake up. This is tricky and I have only ever done it once. That one time I managed to do it I failed because I thought I was in the clear. He didn't show up, so I was like 'now's my chance!' then BAM! He startled me back into an awakened state.

Lastly, can someone tell me what 'PR-based feedback interference' is (what does PR stand for)? And what is 'mental projection'? How does it differ from astral projection? I will be sure to read linked posts that other people have created, such as CFTraveller's. I've just been busy with school work. Thank you all for your helpful contributions! I hope we'll continue to be in touch. It's shouldn't always be about my experiences. That's why I don't mind you all talking about yours. I also thoroughly enjoy reading other stories. Take care everyone!

P.S. -- I will also attempt the methods Nameless, T-Man and EscapeVelocity gave me if Lumaza's is still not working. I could also try to apply a combination of them. Wish me luck! Hopefully one day I will be experienced enough to help others myself.

And furthermore, I read through MarsZM's post, 'Tom Campbell Stance on Negative Entities'. While I was reading it, I couldn't help but notice that their problems were similar to mine. I could totally relate, though their encounters seemed more extreme than mine. And I also noticed Lumaza's comment about their experiences with a man who was somehow able to tell them about their dreams in accurate detail. Then he vanished the following day. Did that really happen? How fascinating! If it's not too much to ask, can someone please tell me more about what it means to be a 'Retriever'. Thanks for everything so far guys.

Thank you all very much for your help. This is the best advice yet. I will attempt Lumaza's technique in a different way. They have an excellent solution, but I wasn't applying it properly and perhaps misinterpreted them. Instead of relying on 'gifts of peace' I will need to face him head on (hopefully without violence). There seems to be no other way for me. Perhaps he isn't an astral parasite after all. Maybe he really is just a fabrication... a manifestation of my doubts and fears. I should have called this story 'I May Be Dealing With An Astral Parasite'. Come to think of it, he really does seem more like a test rather than a parasite, though that doesn't explain why he's after my energy. This is still assuming he's actually real, which may not be true if he's just a hallucination. As for Lumaza's idea about Astral Warriors, I may resort to that if I really need to, but I still don't want to get violent. The idea that other people would have to fight my battles for me rubs me the wrong way.  I need to see how much I can accomplish on my own first.

By the way, I agree with EscapeVelocity on what's garbage to read about as compared to more authentic things concerning the 'paranormal'. There are some things that are more trustworthy than others, but at the end of the day, the only way I can figure out if these types of things are real or not is through subjective experiences. This is the entire point of my journey, but it's also why science hasn't accepted the Otherwhere as fact. I don't care if people don't take me seriously if I'm lucky enough to finally find the proof I need. They can say it's pseudoscience all they want. But if I can find proof for myself and actually talk to those that have passed away, then that's good enough for me. And who knows what else I'd be able to do. Thanks for the help so far guys! 

I could do it in another room, but that's still too close to him and my family could interfere.

Truth be told, if I can't do anything about the hostile entity, I may need to attempt an OBE outside, but that's kind of tricky...

I will give your advice a shot. There is a forest I live near that's perfect for meditation. Alternatively, I could even go to the beach that's near that forest if there's not too many people.

I posted a new story. I think I finally know more about the entity: http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_astral_chat/i_am_dealing_with_an_astral_parasite-t47835.0.html

[Svadhishthana (Sacral) Chakra]

Warning: This story contains disturbing content (even more so than my last story at least from my personal perspective). For those of you who are a bit iffy with such things, you do not have to read this. If you are okay with this, then feel free to proceed.

This is a continuation of my last story: 'An Entity Blocks Me From Astral Projection'. You do not need to read it because this can be considered a stand alone tale, but feel free to do so by clicking the link if you are worried about context and haven't read it yet: http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_astral_chat/an_entity_blocks_me_from_astral_projecting-t47812.0.html. I will not keep showing this link on every one of my posts, as that would be silly. But as long as it ties into some sort of continuation, I will do so for your convenience.

Anyway, I am certain that I am dealing with an astral parasite. I understand there are many different types of them. Some resemble small/giant spiders (which I have seen many of) and others resemble wasps. However, the one that seems the most interested in me is a ghoulish humanoid figure that I've only ever seen once (during my first experience). Subsequent encounters involve me hearing him but not being able to see him aside from his occasional shadow (even when I open my eyes). This time was no different. But the circumstances of this particular episode were unusual and extraordinary. I was on the brink of leaving my body. I was about to do it, much to my amazement. I felt a tingling sensation and lifted my astral head a little bit out of my physical body. But as usual, he came to me and stopped me from exiting. I was especially frustrated because of how close I was to accomplishing and OBE. When he does this, it usually involves him hissing or gasping (or whatever other weird noises he decides to make). But this time, when he was finished doing that, he began to suck my energy and zapped my astral body of its built up power. He has attempted this before, but I had never given him such a long window of opportunity. I feel like a fool for not realizing he's an astral parasite, but before this episode, I wasn't quite sure. I should've known. I didn't want to fight back. As I've said before, I don't want to get violent. If I had decided to leave my body and fight him, who knows what would've happened. But as he continued to suck my energy, it became harder and harder to exit, and I was about to revert back to a lower energy state (since I rely on elevating my frequencies to attempt an OBE). So I suppose I'm not even capable of fighting back with my lack of experience. In my mind, since I was paralyzed, I asked him, 'Who are you and what do you want?' No response. He just continued sucking my power as if he were a vacuum cleaner. I have tried talking to him before and have asked him similar questions, but he has never once spoken to me. Perhaps he cannot or chooses not to for some reason. I get the feeling he understands me though.

But the most disturbing thing about this encounter was that he grabbed my crotch. I still couldn't see him, but I could feel his deathly thin hand clawing away. It was a violation of my privacy, but he didn't care. I don't actually know if he was trying to assault me sexually or if it was just a part of the draining process (or both) but I most certainly felt him grab my unmentionables. I think I read somewhere that the human genitals house the Svadhishthana (Sacral) Chakra. It deals with sexual temptations and other emotions. It is blocked by fear, especially the fear of death. This is a very serious issue now that I know what I'm dealing with. Does anyone know why he is after this specific chakra? I also tried Lumaza's recommendation of 'giving him a cookie' before he started sucking my energy. I assumed they meant I should send him positive thoughts of peace and kindness, but he was never after that, so it had no effect on him. He was after my energies this whole time. I don't know where he came from or how he found me, but I at least finally know of his intentions. So with this new information, does anyone have any substantial advice? I am very worried and would appreciate it very much. I will keep you all posted if new things happen to me concerning this bizarre entity.

-CEO929-

The question you ask has always fascinated me. If you really think about it though, it's quite a scary thing indeed. I mean, eternity is a very long time. It's sheer mass is enough to overwhelm anyone. On the other hand, if there is an end, for example death being the ultimate end all be all, then what would that mean for us? What would that be like? If death wasn't the end and our consciousness lives on in some form (as I'm sure a lot of people believe on this site) then can we die a second time? A true death, so to speak, if the soul also ceases. Would that truly be the end or would we just be reincarnated as something else in some random reality from the infinite sea of possibilities? Essentially we would just have to start over because all of our old experiences and memories would be lost for good. I hope we can at least get a break every now and again if nothing ever truly ends... Jeez... nothing wrong with a breather from time to time, am I right? 

Hi. I posted something new. If you want, check it out here: http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_astral_chat/vision_of_a_dog_comes_to_me_during_sleep_paralysis-t47827.0.html

I am not making much progress. I am still a little nervous about trying to make peace with the hostile entity. I have tried a couple of times, but he gives me no time to respond and continues acting hostile. What should I do? And as for my other post, feel free to give me advice there to. I'm not so sure a simple cookie will do the trick for this entity... 

Some time ago, I posted a story about how I was unable to astral project because an entity kept blocking me. You can read more about it here:
http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_astral_chat/an_entity_blocks_me_from_astral_projecting-t47812.0.html

However, when I don't have a sleep paralysis episode in my own room, another hallucination comes to me instead of the more hostile one described in my last story. It is a dog. I can never see it, but I know it's there. What does this mean? I try and let it 'guide' me out of my body, but nothing happens and I regain control of my physical body. Perhaps it's because this dog always catches me off guard. Is it just a hallucination? Is it a spirit animal? What's really weird is that (rarely) this dog comes to me in my room when I am in a better mood (still only during sleep paralysis) rather than the other hostile entity. And as mentioned earlier, when I attempt to project in any other room, the dog is more likely to show up. Could this be the key to unlocking access to the astral? Has anyone else had these types of experiences? What should I do next?

By the way, I just realized that Lumaza already described what the astral (or Otherwhere) realm is like. I was in a rush. Silly me! If it's really real and if it's as extraordinary as people claim it is, then I have become even more curious.

It seems almost too good to be true. However, I will give this a shot. I am finished with some of my studies. I have more to do, but even still I should have less on my mind. This should help get things started. I keep saying I'm going to do something, but the truth is I'm just a little apprehensive because I don't know what's going to happen. I'm quite inexperienced when it comes to these sort of experiences compared to others here. Thanks for your help so far though!

Is see. Interesting... Now, when you say give him a cookie, do you mean an actual physical cookie?  If so, how would that work? What else could I give him? If it's non-physical, then how would I give it to him/form it? I will attempt to induce an episode. I have studying to do at the moment. When I am done, I will have time to do it. Will keep you posted. Have you already had a breakthrough? Did you already make it to the astral realm? What's it like?

A cookie? What do you mean? I don't know if that would work. Any other ideas (besides facing him head on with no violence)? I would prefer if there was no violence involved with any other idea.

I have already posted a story called 'An Entity Blocks Me From Astral Projecting' which you can read about here: http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_astral_chat/an_entity_blocks_me_from_astral_projecting-t47812.0.html

I am eager to share any other experiences I might have. Any advice on my topic will be much appreciated. I am also very interested in
other people's stories so I hope we'll all get along. As of now, I am still very new, so I am thrilled to start exploring the forums this site
has to offer.

-CEO929-

Thanks for the advice. I'll keep you posted on what happens.

-CEO929-

   Like with my fascination with outer space, I've always been captivated by the concept of the afterlife. Like space, it seems far too vast for the mind to comprehend. Though unlike space, some do not thing it is real. Its existence cannot be as easily proven. However, because of my encounters with ghosts, I always thought I had enough proof of its presence. So, I tried dabbling in astral projection when I was younger, but it backfired. Not only did I fail to leave my body; I may have also accidentally allowed unwanted spirits to enter my home. When I moved, they never followed me, though perhaps they are still there in that house, or perhaps they left.  It actually felt like they left even before I moved away, but before that, they may have caused very bad luck for my family (financial troubles, broken appliances, etc...)

   Because of that incident, for a while I had decided to quit my 'hobby' of astral projection. It was quite a harsh lesson for me to learn indeed, but the spirits that were attracted to my meditation were not that physically harmful (aside from the bad luck). Even still, it was creepy to see the occasional shadow pass by during the day or when the moonlight was strong. My aversion to an out of body experience (OBE) remained for years as I thought of myself as lucky for avoiding the persistence of the spirits, so I did not want to push that luck ever again. Even the bad luck wore off after some time passed and especially after I moved. My family does not seem to be effected by them at home anymore either.

   However, my mind was changed when I saw death effect a family member directly for the first time in my life. It was a harrowing and deeply distressing experience. When this relative passed, I couldn't help but feel completely helpless and wanted them back more than anything. I am certain they still exist somewhere. I mean, I have seen ghost shadows and have experienced paranormal things even before I tried astral projecting for the first time. After another close relative passed away, (shortly after the first to add insult to injury) I was tired of not being able to do anything. I wanted to say so much to them, but they were taken from me before I could do anything meaningful for them.

   On top of this, a good friend of mine took his life. I had not seen him in a while ever since I moved, so when I heard the news, I was extremely upset. Their deaths were my tipping point. I am aware of the potential dangers of astral projection, but I long for the opportunity to speak to them again. I've done my research and have come to the conclusion that it is next to impossible, or at least really hard, to astral project while awake. I've tried meditating for a while now, but to no avail. Every time I look up a how-to guide on how to accomplish an OBE, they never give me examples on how to do it when I'm awake. It's actually kind of disheartening, because it tells me that perhaps an OBE is just a form of lucid dreaming. In other words, there's a chance it's not real. Some people think that an astral experience and a lucid dream are the same thing. But if it doesn't feel real enough, then it may as well not be authentic. I may need to specifically look up how to do this when awake, but I haven't gotten around to doing something this challenging. For now, I will focus on trying to do it while asleep. If it feels real enough and if it's incredibly vivid, I may have all the proof I need. I should be able to tell if it's a dream or not. I have a theory, actually.

   There are different stages of sleep. REM sleep and stages 1, 2 and 3 respectively. During the deeper stages of sleep, it is next to impossible to perform an OBE, similar to when you're completely awake. But as you enter the 'lighter' realms of sleep, the brain becomes more receptive to your awareness and the subconscious mind is no longer the one that's dominantly in control. During this state, a skilled sleeper can preform lucid dreaming. I've done this myself before. For most people, it is very difficult to get past this point. Many would simply mistake a lucid dream for a legitimate astral experience, but there are many ways for one to tell if their experiences are real or not. In a dream, doing things like running, pulling your skin, flying, or even looking at your reflection will seem very off as the brain can hardly comprehend how to create such an accurate simulated portrayal. But there's no better proof than simply looking up at the sky. If it looks like a painting, then you're most definitely in a dream.
 
  This has happened to me many times and has led me to wake up with a bittersweet feeling of disappointment. Sleep is a strange thing indeed, so most people would probably have a very difficult time training for a true experience. I mean, it's obvious when something feels real, because when something is real, the brain collects data rather than relying on itself to create it. That is why we can comprehend the sky when we see it in real life. Even the very detailed night-time sky is easy to see in its entirety (or at least as much as we can see it). If astral projection is real, then in theory it should be possible to transport my consciousness to other realms in both the physical and non-physical dimensions, thus allowing my brain to gather external data rather than create things with the data I have already accrued.

   There's a strange thing about myself I haven't told you yet, so I may as well just tell you about it now. I suffer from a sleep disorder known as narcolepsy; however, I am fortunate enough to have a mild form of it. When I hit puberty, its symptoms started to take form. One of the most well-known symptoms that comes with this disorder is sleep paralysis. Because of my mild affliction, this paralysis does not carry over in the waking world when I experience strong emotions.

   When sleep paralysis happened to me the first time, I was petrified. I had heard about it before, but during the heat of the moment I had completely forgotten about that fact. To me, it was unlike anything I had experienced before. I panicked for a while, but then realized this was something I knew about beforehand. Sure, it hadn't happened to me up until this point, but I still knew about its existence. Never in my wildest dreams did I think it could happen to me. Now, instead of panicking, I knew that it would be better to stay calm. I could only control my eyes, so I opened them. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. I quickly closed them, realising this was an unwise thing to do. I wiggled my toes and hands and eventually broke free. The episode didn't seem to last long, but it felt like quite some time had passed.

   I eventually learned how to handle my narcolepsy once I was diagnosed and tested for it (brainwaves and everything). I had developed a strict sleeping schedule, which has caused me to wake up early more frequently. It has done wonders for me and prevents a sleep paralysis attack. The condition runs in my family, so I am not the only one who has had to deal with this cumbersome disorder. But annoying as it may be, I realised how useful sleep paralysis is for astral projection. You see, ordinarily people have an exceedingly difficult time making it past the lucid dream state. In order to induce an episode of astral projection, your brain needs to emit alpha waves even while currently 'asleep.' These are the same waves your mind emits when it is awake. This disorder prevents the brain from entering the deepest stages of sleep on a regular basis, which is why I can lucid dream more easily than most.

   Maybe an OBE comes more naturally to some than others. Even if you don't have narcolepsy, it may be very easy for you to 'slip' out of your physical body when you fall asleep. I've heard some people can even do it at will (though I haven't heard about anyone being able to do this while awake). So, you may be thinking that I have managed to accomplish what many would love to achieve in a much shorter span of time because of my disorder. But you'd be wrong. I am not like those gifted individuals. Well, maybe I am or maybe I'm not. Let me explain.

   During my third episode of sleep paralysis, I had discovered another interesting thing called waking hallucinations (hypnopompic hallucinations). These are also caused by my brain not entering a deeper state of sleep more frequently. Once I got over my inevitable shock upon seeing them when I opened my eyes accidentally (more like automatically, actually) I got used to these hallucinations. The visual ones were pretty cool to look at, to be honest. There was a blue wisp that floated around my room, a red flame that scooted across the floor, and a mini black hole that sucked up some of the light coming from my blinds. When my eyes were closed, tactile hallucinations were more likely to occur for some reason. I could feel hands stroking me and touching me in very uncomfortable places. My mind was playing tricks on me and was dreaming while awake.

   That's the reason why I can't astral travel during an attack. I am too preoccupied by my hallucinations. It's been quite some time since I've had an attack that is merely a state of paralysis and nothing more. But lately something even more unnerving has been happening to me. Ever since my second close relative passed away, a strange man has been visiting me during my paralysis episodes. As of today, I have only ever seen him once. My eyes opened on their own accord, since that's what happens all the time when I first wake up. That's when I saw him. He was a ghoul like creature and had sharp pointy teeth. He breathed heavily like his lungs were full of something. His skin was rotting away and brown. Despite this, he had no smell. I've never smelled anything in any of my hallucinations. His presence and 'rules' so to speak seemed to be consistent and in line with all of my other hallucinations (like me not being able to smell him), but he was still the most realistic thing my mind had ever concocted. I swear, it was like he was really there. He crept closer and closer to me as I was trapped in a state between wakefulness and sleep. I broke free from my sleep paralysis just before he got to me. I'll never forget those yellowish sunken eyes. He seemed so angry and spiteful.

   And here's the crazy part. He hasn't stopped visiting me. He's continued to torment me time and time again. If I had known this would be such a problem, I would've attempted an OBE ages ago. By comparison, the other hallucinations I've had would've been much easier to handle and shouldn't have been able to stop me from having an experience. This man, or whatever he's really supposed to be, is a deeply alarming and worrying experience. He seems more dynamic and intelligent than my other visual creations. It got to the point where I felt like he wasn't even my conception. It was almost like he had a mind of his own. An existence of his own. What's even stranger is he never came to me until enough of my loved ones passed away. Perhaps I'm thinking too much into this. Maybe it's just my brain playing tricks on me because of my past trauma with death. But I don't know anymore. My hallucinations now almost entirely consist of him, and during the rare moments he isn't there, things like wasps, and usually small or giant tarantula-like spiders, take his place. Sometimes he's there with these insects. It's almost like they're attracted to him.

   Some people think I'm a bit silly for believing in ghosts. But in the waking world, I have had some bizarre experiences. I've heard ghosts before. Never their voices, but I've seen them move things that made a lot of sounds. I've also seen someone stroke my shower curtains or completely unravel a large roll of toilet paper. It just started spinning on its own (this was back when I was living in the US in my old home). And as I said earlier, I have seen shadow people scoot across the floor mostly during the day. My brother has also had his fair share of experiences. Unlike me, he's both seen and heard spirits in their entirety. They have called his name before. We've both seen shadow people, but he's seen ghosts in much more detail than just their shadows alone. Perhaps he is just more sensitive to these things than I am. Scientists say that these are just hallucinations created by some sort of specific vibrational frequency, but I don't know. I mean, maybe that's how it is for some people, but that doesn't explain the toilet paper. Plus, my brother and I saw shadow people in the exact same spot at the exact same time. This happened on more than one occasion.

   I am at a loss. I don't know what to do next. How can I protect myself from negative spirits (and preferably just avoid them to begin with)? How do I get this creature to leave me alone (hopefully in a peaceful manner)? How do I astral project if I can solve this issue? If I do astral project, how do I avoid bad luck from negative spirits and how do I stop them from even entering my home?