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Well, after I posted my message, I really mulled things over. My posting doesn't really cover completely the situation, and I was slightly distraught when I wrote it.  And thank you all for your kind input.

BUT, I did research into the chakras meditation that I learned a few months ago, and started meditating again. After the 1st day, I had a dream about a journey I was taking by myself, (of which I posted under the Dreams message boards here). I was hiking thru the snow to be on a journey by myself somewhere. I felt great! When I awoke I felt great as well!  

It's been a super week, actually, and other than a horrific dream yesterday, things have been feeling quite positive. (I dreamt that some house where I was hanging out, meditating with an older lady with long grey hair, and with friends, was sucked down into the earth! I tried to reach down and grab these two special friends of mine, but they were lost. The earth closed up over everthing. And there I was - in the middle of a countryside, train tracks on one side of me and the countryside all around.  By myself.)

I've been researching into university courses and ended jup signing up for a local course ... and I feel great about it... a bit nervous, but good! (The course follows along a creative/artistic interest I have.)

I've also been feeling somewhat more assertive internally (if that makes any sense), trying to quiet down that 'little voice', ie: "thanks for sharing, talk to you later" type things.  Hanging out with positive people, etc. Just have been really exploring how I have been feeling about things lately, and what is going to be the best for me.

I think what I have realized, (after reading on other relationship type web-sites message boards), is that there are definetely huge issues within this relationship (both parties) and will this work.  

Thank you kindly, Gorilla, for the awesome NEW information. It will be a terrific read that is right up my alley!

Cheers,
D

Hi Michael,

I am just a very new person to these forums... but when I read your experience, I actually visualized a man as well, but with dark hair, and around 40 - 45.  Interesting.  Not sure if this even qualifies. It would be interesting to know what happens, if you choose to follow up with this person.

Cheers and regards,
D.

Thank you Nay,

I have been surfing through the forums and there is quite a bit of interesting information out there, for sure. I am positive this will be a good place to 'hang out' and post my queries , (as wacko as they will probably sound, lol), and wierd experiences.

Thanks and cheers,
D.

Good Day all,

I had this most peculiar dream this a.m.  and I was wondering what others' take on this dream is.

I was packed and going on a journey to stay somewhere in the woods by myself for some time; like a camping/tenting trip.  It was a very strange dream. I walked quite a bit through snowy terrain, some on trails other times through fields and woods, walked through/startled a group of black, long-horned cattle, avoided a very strange individual who wanted something from me, overcame some rocky climbing obstacles, etc. It was very strange dream, but I felt good about my trip!  This is going to sound funny, but even my Mom cooked all my favorite protein meats for me: chicken, shrimp, etc, and I asked her what she was doing and she said that I needed extra food.  Ha ha. (Sorry, this strikes me as funny.)

Personally, I think this dream means that I could be on a new path, and possibly on my own, but am not quite sure. My family has always been there for me for the most part in my life, so the dream about my Mother is a given. The obstacles in my dream I managed to overcome on my own, without too much struggle.  

Anyway, hope this makes sense! Thanks in advance for anyone's input.
D.

Hi Zy, I just posted a new topic and then scrolled down and saw yours ... I feel the same way too with my guy. Draining, etc., is how I feel as well.  Like all of the fight has gone out of me.

I really like some of the posts that are here and they give something to work with as well.

My DF is looking at purchasing a business, and he can't see the positives, (can't see the forest for the trees so-to-speak), but we would be in this together as well.  I think I have some serious decisions to make.  

I sure hope things work out for you, whatever you choose.

Cheers,
D.

Hi all, I'm not sure how to post this message, and might read a bit awry - sorry.

The fact of the matter is that my df is just a plain negative person. I have been with him for 5.5 years and I've changed myself during that time.  When he is gone to work during the week I'm actually not too bad, by the time he is home on the weekend and leaves for work again by Sunday night, I can't wait for him to go. It is a stressful where it feels like we are sharing 'power' struggles (if that makes any sense), and we butt heads so much.  This encompasses everything from having people over, traveling, to my purchasing a vehicle (2nd time now), home improvements, my finances, friends and my life in general, etc. I end up just drinking too much on the weekends/and (for the most part) just to deal /escape with this c--p.

I try to put up this 'mental wall' / 'circle of energy around me' to go between my energy and his just so I feel better, but it is really hard to do.  It is just draining being around him so much of the time! I just don't understand it... I just end up feeling drained, tired and just don't want to put up a 'fight' anymore and end up not caring about things.  Now I am feeling that I am resenting him more and more and semi-seriously considering terminating the relationship.

The past year I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease and the last 7 months has been a struggle with getting my health back under control and I am almost there! (Thank goodness). The awesome side to this story is that I am feeling way better due to hormone replacement and am feeling more like myself, and ready to face challenges again - almost.  

One of the main issues with this disease is that much of the research I have done on it is that the issue of stress-reduction comes up time and time again! Ha ha. Ironic, because stress has been a touchy issue with me since grade 6!  

Basically, I think what I'm asking anyone here is this: Is there a way I can build up my internal/positive energy back up again?

I have experience in Yoga, transcendental meditation (which I haven't done for several years), Pilate's, etc.  I have had an energy cleansing done, but that was approx a year and a half ago, and there is no one in this community which does that particular thing. I am sensitive/very receptive to certain things and have had some particular interesting experiences with meditation, energy healing and also some kind of meditation which focused on the chakras and whatnot, but I won't get into that here.

Okay. That's all for that long-winded story. Thank you kindly in advance anyone.

Cheers,
D

Hello all, a co-worker of mine suggested this site and here I am.  I've been interested in spiritual work for many years, and actually learned and practised transcedental meditation in high school... way way back that is!  I have many interests in spiritituality and healing, and try to learn about some, and workshops in others.

I haven't followed meditation for years, but probably should get back into it. I developed some very serious health problems last summer and apparently it is important to work on stress management for myself. I have fallen out of meditation long ago, and should be making consious effort here to get back into it. It would be nice to rejuvinate the spirit and whatnot.

I mildly practise yoga, pilates and try to follow my 'inner guide' in situations.  One of the reasons I decided to check out this website is for personal healing and getting 'back on track' with life. If that makes any sense! lol

I hope to find some exciting and fruitful information and conversations here! Thanks.

Cheers,
Dar.