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Just sharing my Youtube channel.
Not much there as it's fairly new, but i hope you find something interesting in there.

http://www.youtube.com/user/1nsightOD

Two things happened last night/morning, one scary dream and second thing was heavy memory loss upon waking up.

I set my alarm away from bed so i need to get off bed to shut it and set it 6:30, i have one of those alarms where you need to push "set alarm" button while tapping minute or hour button to chance time.
Then i wake up 9:30 and my alarm is set to 6:00 

It seems i have get off from bed and wanted to sleep 30min more, tapped minute button 30 times while pushing "set alarm", but forgot to set hour to 7 and then got back to sleep, and i can't remember anything from it.

Scary part of my nightmare was when i went to old building with closed porch at night.
There was bit of light coming from behind me as i opened the first door and went inside to this closed porch with windows, nothing yet, but when opening door to actual building there was this ju-on/grudge style scare, there was someone looking at me from the opening of the door.
Well that's not bad, i'm hard to scare if i say so my self, but this someone was... me! Only more pale and rugged. Ofc i started to back away to the first door but it was locked and had to confront myself in more ways than one  But he/me/whoever was not there anymore.

Just had to share, it was so weird.

Edit:
For those who are trying to understand what this means for me.
It's reflection of myself from few years back when i was deeply depressed and alone, it showed me how far i have come and that this part of me is still there, partly dealt with and partly suppressed. Trough this dream i could accept it as part of myself and deal with it. Me going back inside with compassion after mustering my courage made it vanish. I feel kinda good about this all

If any of you more experienced in dreams could give me some ideas what's happening to my dreamscape, to me or to my 2 tiny braincells. I contribute this side effect to my Salvia experimentation, but i feel it's not the cause and only explains what triggered this.

To this day i have had poor dream recall and movie like dreams, non vivid and fake dreams, but few nights back it all chanced as i had most amazing experience since many years back.

It was morning and i put snooze alarm for 15min, think i failed to actually set alarm on as it didn't work.
I had dream so real i still feel like it was real night i lived, not going to explain first part of the dream as it's fairly basic and personal, but we had Lots of people partying in my apartment and at one point we went outside, not sure why. Area around my apartment building was different from reality, also there was this lunar feeling like there where no air, where my apartment felt bit foggy, probable because all the smoking 
There was place we made fire and had some good time even tho it was winter, not cold at all tho.
Suddenly everyone left in hurry, running to cars and drove off and i was left behind confused. So i started to look for my apartment again, but even tho it should have been right there i couldn't find it. Then i started to think, it felt weird, everything seemed to have this void of air feeling and everything i could see was very toylike, not visually much but the feeling was creeping on me that it's all fake, and then it dawned on me that it's a dream and i was lucid. Last bit of the dream i spend running without any restriction of speed around the city exploring, city was kind of beautiful and clean, no pollution  There where lots of neon everywhere too. Then i wake up to my alarm, shut it's mouth and stand up from bed only to notice I'm naked not sure if i went to sleep like that or not. So i started to search for my boxers and finally found them, started to put them on only to fall backwards and wake up from my bed with clothes on. There i was bit confused thinking how weird and real that dream was while i did my usual morning routine. Then... again i got this feeling that everything is fake, closed my eyes and woke up again from my bed only to find i was late from work, at this point i started to question immediately if it's dream or not, reality check showed it's real and i was wake.
This all that felt like a night of partying happened inside 30min in the morning.

Same day at evening i took a nap without alarm and i slept 2 to 3 hours and this was extreme dream or what the hell ever it was.
My memory of the dream starts as I'm flying trough DMT like scene with impossible geometry and visual complexity, it looked much like this even tho it can only be experienced, everything else does no justice. http://www.spikednation.com/sites/default/files/emvideo-youtube-TvRCE-KtZ2o.jpg
Many people report flying trough similar scene when tripping on DMT, but personally i never did see anything like that when i tried it, and now I'm there without the substance?!
Then it started dissolving, kind of fold away and i got sense of me laying in my couch, this was far from reality still as i started to feel and see like someone lifts my head side of couch up and vertical and all the way almost 180 decrees nearly faceplanting me to the floor, then slowly back to normal. I had this feeling it was my friend who did it and i said "i wake up with less dude" only to realise my friend left before i started to nap and who has the strength to do that anyways. I still felt like i was between sleep and wake unable to move, finally got my eyes open and room looked like spinning, almost like when one is seriously drunk, but it stabilized fairly fast, i could move again and was normal and wake.

I feel like this wasn't end of it yet. have to wait and see what amazing dreams are coming my way in the future 

I'v lately been experimenting with salvia divinorum. At first it was curiosity of what it's like, but it quickly turned into more profound experimentation as i noticed striking consistency of the space i was ripped into. I try and explain best i can.

I have explored this from psychological and spiritual angles as well, but decided to write here from angle that explores structure of our space and time.

Salvia for me has never induced any kind of visuals, loss of conciousness or imaginative scenarios... well let's just say nothing actually. There is just this feeling of been taken from 3d reality in direction that would be 4th spacial dimension in every way imaginable. What i see, even more sense and feel is that i'm stuck and peeking out from 2d(3d?) surface of some hypercube like structure that is rotating and shifting slowly and it's filled with extremely dense energy, so dense even moving a finger is a challenge. This space feels more real than reality but at the same time surfaces of this hypercube seems very artificial and plasticky, if i open my eyes i can see our reality superimposed on these surfaces.

First time i took sizeable hit and went to this space i felt wonder but trapped and helpless, stuck in our reality, on the surface. I thought i needed to take bigger hit, that this wasn't where i was supposed to be, that i was left midway. Further experimentation proved this wrong. Just more i smoke more clearly i sense and see this space and more out of the surface i am, but at the same time this energy becomes almost unbearable and i start to blackout.

Decided to post this here as its about reality and quantum physics at it's core.
Would also really want to know what the hell is going on, i know it's just a trip, but it's so interesting, consistent and real.

Just food for thought 

Last evening i had this strong sense of knowing about inner workings of consciousness and how it effects our life after death. I explain it here even tho it's kind of hard to but in to words, need to use some paradoxes and age old questions as an example or i get nowhere

Let's start with free will.
Past effects ones choices and actions just as choices and actions effect ones future, then is there free will or are our choices determined by our past events? How i see it is that while on physical our free will is limited, mostly illusion where we have rare moments of choice taking form of it's own separate from past and this is what could be called our higher self or divine guidance, funny thing tho, it's still not you doing the choice in materialistic ego sense if you identify yourself like this. Chain of cause and effect broken by occasional intervention of divine, how much your willing to give yourself in to higher self and listen determines how often this chain is broken.

Afterlife.
My belief is When we die we go trough most relevant and emotionally charged events of our life again to get second look at them from another perspective to grow. Then comes time of choice, either we continue towards the source and endless possibilities or we find way to reincarnate here again. Here comes the shocker, whatever you think and feel, however much you want to leave all behind you always come back. Let's try and understand our higher self when making this choice, either you want to protect, help, love, give joy or just be present in someones life or either you feel you need to grow more, right the wrong doings from past life... there's so many reason to come here again when we feel with our hearts and only one reason is enough. Would be selfish to leave all behind, you think your higher self is like this?
Only when we as a collective decide to go forth we do, leaving no soul behind.

Time travel paradox where you go and kill your father before your born.
From perspective of time traveler you get born, live, travel to past and kill your father, nothing happens.
Back when you where in afterlife and about to reincarnate there is no option to born as this time traveler so you just pick another option like nothing ever happened. Our higher self perceives time very differently and is not bound to one reincarnation, place or time at a time.

Time travel paradox where cause and effect breaks down, other words you take action to correct something in the past and end up causing whatever it's in the first place.
Now we are getting somewhere Everything happens at the sameeee timeeee, cause and effect go hand in hand, it doesn't matter what came first as they both emerge at this same instant. If we go deep enough in to it, reality, world, divine source, whatever doesn't exist in frame of our understanding. no time, no dimension, just spark of consciousness beyond time and space, nowhere and everywhere happening in an instant and for eternity.

So let's enjoy our life and be present in now with all our heart and stop wasting this experience.

Long time ago there was a lone farmer living in a small house not far from busiest road between large village and the forest where poor folk lived. Farmer had plenty of food, scenery around the house was beautiful and he even had a piano bought from village inn. He was very kind and generous, happy and blissful so much so that some could have called him enlightened, he only thought himself as very modest and simple man.

Poor folk used the road to go and buy whatever they could with little they had.
One day nice and kind poor fellow bumbed in to the farmer at the village market, farmer offered to buy some food for the fellow and invited him for a tea at the farm. Soon they became friends and poor fellow would ask if his friends could come and get to know the farmer too.

Time passed and now farmer had people coming to see him all the time even from far away places as he radiated good will and love, he had plenty of food to share and shelter for travelers. Everything he had was shared with everyone on one condition, that others would share everything too. This worked well and there was new kind of air around people living outside village, air of hope and joy.

As rich villagers where cold and heartless, poor people also had a darker side as they loved to drink and party to drown their sorrows for just a little time and discuss how evil and mad rich villagers where. Farmer didn't like that much, but he always knew peoples hearts and never judged. Every morning before work at farm he would clean the house from last nights partying and make a meal for anyone he had sheltered for the night. He rarely got helping hand as everyone would be either drunk or sleeping hangovers.

One day feeling came upon farmer that if he continues to give he wouldn't have enough to eat for himself, his house would be destroyed bit by bit because of heavy partying and he never would have time to enjoy his beautiful scenery in silence.

What should the farmer do?

...is all you have, enjoy it 

I woke up this morning tears of joy in my eyes, full of love, not for anyone but for everything.
My cousin is in love too, with someone. He was fearful for the future, if it lasts, if it goes well. Nothing better in this world than to reassure someone close to you that what he has now is only thing that matters and to take all joy out of it that he possibly can, future has it's time. And to see the glimmer in eyes that follows of someone in love without doubt

This post has nothing for the thinking mind, no reason, just sharing good will and love 

Have i become soft, sure i have  Like a cloud laying down on a cloud.

Don't think how good it feels to be happy and blissful and how to get there, it's already in you, feel it

All good to everyone who reads this.
Btw, best forum to date, yes?

Yesterday i did little bit of weed in already fairly blissful state and something weird happened.
I know how it effects me and this surely wasn't usual business.

it's was normal high when i was doing something, but when i laid down and relaxed i felt overwhelming vibrations and sensations all over my body, almost if i was forcefully been dragged out of my body, reminded me of that feeling you get when awake and on edge of OBE, this was just way more extreme. When i stand up and did something it all calmed down again.

It was good feeling besides feeling like i was going to explode from the energy and hearth racing.

Maybe i was without an effort almost OBEing and just not ready for it at that moment?
Kundalini? Doing something working as "grounding"?

Danger in this? As i want to go all the way next time it happens.

Or was i?

I just started to think my childhood again as one of my relatives said it was cute when i was child as i imagined all kinds of things. I truly believed back then i could shoot energies out of my hands and other energy related stuff. Ofc this subsided older i got. I was very energetic all around, never still. Supposedly amazingly smart, but that's what everyone says about their children. Then came early teens and became thoughtful and kind, always been very empathic and prone to daydream, that didn't go well with other children... at all. I did all kinds of pen and paper creative stuff i don't even understand today (yes i have them still). Never fit anywhere, still really wont that much. Born rebel  I was glad when i got older as my peers stopped all... at least most of the weird things and unjust.

I'm not here to cry about my past, it all has made who i am today, just want some outside opinion and your childhood stories if you have some interesting ones
Could i have had some residue memories left from my reincarnation or was i just deluded? Either way, conditionining is a powerful thing

Finally got my recall up and running and that's all good.

Problem is this...
I woke up in my dreams many times last night but i always woke up "dream walking" or in my bed, sometimes i was not in my bed, or there was friends visiting or snooze alarm was different than it should be, but i always just tried to project not realizing i was already dreaming, i think i even dreamed inside a dream ones or twice 

Before i fell asleep i said to myself while observing that this is a dream, ofc if i'm already dreaming and i'm not believing myself while really awake this doesn't do much if situation is the same 

Question is this, if this happens, when to open my eyes or how to set better intent on noticing a dream? 

I try to explain best i can, "I" as a physical consciousness interpreting everything through language 

I can only take this egoistic perspective so not very fond of what i'm doing now, but maybe i can shed some light and help others giving my perspective on things.

Most of the time i have this blank mind thing going on that has creeped on me trough years and my take towards life has chanced continually, i had my moments of divine no doubt but it never chanced me much and kinda forgot them.
In the past i used to daydream at every opportunity, you could take this as giving up on physical and letting subconsciousness roam free, today i feel like my subconsciousness is giving up too as these daydreams have quieted down to the point i just am. My surroundings are like watery reflection, i see more clearly when i interact less with it, i observe more than anything, have no opinions and let everyone else direct situations, friends say i wont talk much, but when i do it makes people silent and thoughful, there's truth in that, only say anything when it has meaning and purpose for the situation or when it makes people feel good and happy I also feel most of my thoughs aren't from me or that i even can understand them fully, they lose meaning and purity when i start to think. I love life and people, it doesn't matter how bad of a situation or how seemingly rotten someone is, i see WHY it is how it is and there's always purity and love at the source of things. I also feel i have no need to be here anymore, but i'm happy nevertheless, life here is interesting, but when my physical body runs it's coarse i'm not coming back here i feel.

How i understand this is that human consciousness has layers that need to give up and quiet down for higher self to be heard more clearly and this does not happen suddenly as to say you experience enlightenment, nor is there point where you can say you are enlightened, these are all egoistic goals.

There's so much i want to share now that i'm on it, but there's truly nothing more to say that can help anyone on they'r quest.

When you give up and forget where you want to be, you will get there. 

There are many views similar based in that we are all one and interconnected, but have there been any books or articles exploring this dynamic deeper?

I'm at work so i keep this very short.
First of all try to get rid of the idea that split personality is somekind of sickness or this gives very weird look on everything 

How i view all this is that there is one consciousness at the very highest peak of reality, just pure creativity not capable of perceiving itself or thinking on it's own, could be anything we cant understand really, some may call it god. We are then just end points of this imagination if you will. Funny when you think about madness in this context, it just becomes kind of overextend flow of this creativity from where it should have manifested as single coherent mind perceiving itself.
Where would have this all started then? What makes most sense is that first this point of pure consciousness splits creating several lower entities that aren't as pure but more varied. Maybe the purest form is one emotion, love so pure we cant get our minds around it just like one part can't perceive the whole. These lower entities could then be several other basic emotions creating balance. This split then continues decreasing in intesity but increasing in varitety until there is entire worlds created and parts of the whole living in them and forgetting even what they are part of, and i'm not necesserily speaking about humans now as who's to say there can't be this kind of self deception in higher dimensions, higher levels of consciousness too, and i belive there is.
Simple, right? 

Hi!

Just a guy from lapland of finland, winter is coming i need to get out to astral planes for overwinter 
I work in a IT company but at the same time live fairly aloof life, have friends without jobs just cruising along outside of many society's expectations. I do psychedelics sometimes for fun, spiritual development and also for interest/research. I'm deeply rooted in my beliefs influenced by eastern filosophies, science and other bits and pieces i have put together, but that's entirely another topic.
Oh almost forgot, been here for 27 years now.

As long as i remember i'v been interested in LD, OBE, maybe just not enough as only now i'm dead serious for mastering these things. Had some halfhearthed attempts at LD and had 2 of them some years back after 1 week of trying, dont ask me why i lost interest as even i dont know, maybe i just wanted to sleep soundly for a chance and then forgot all of it because physical life distractions.

Been collecting some information about OBEs in past years from here and there but for these few days i'v been sucking info like a black hole  Not much of a book guy, only read few books in my entire life, but picked up Astral Dynamics from Robert Bruce and it was interesting one to say at least.

So it's now been few days ot this quest of mine if you can call it that and as you can expect no real OBE yet, but i feel i'm getting there as i get used of feeling these images surging within me when i go trance and try to "free" myself, you know the drill better than i do

So, here i am, you just need to try and endure