back... maybe?

[bounda]

i havnt visited the site in a while...
reality has a strong grip on me at the moment and now its hard to believe all of this aping stuff, i havnt practiced in ages because i didn't care

i want to return to it, but i have doubts about it existing and i think if its all a load of crap it wud be a waste of time, i need something to convince me, maybe someone cud figure out wat i look like or something, but if i cud get back to this it wud really help me right now

ive changed quite a lot since my last visit and i find myself laughing less, i seem a ton more mature than i used to be, and i can take any diss you can think of and disregard it, as i don't care what other ppl think of me

anyways reply to this thread if u need to or have any ideas or w/e to help bring me to wherever i was

[bounda]

thanks, i had to read it over a few times to get rid of the confusion

what i think your saying is that if you believe in something, then you make it real, but if you dont believe in it, then it isnt real

BouND NuMB:    think of something
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   hmm k
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   ima think of something easy to guess
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   but harder to specify
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   k
BouND NuMB:   ok
BouND NuMB:   dude
BouND NuMB:   is ur phone number something like
BouND NuMB:   741
BouND NuMB:   something
BouND NuMB:   like
BouND NuMB:   is 741 in it
BouND NuMB:   dont tell me it if im wrong
BouND NuMB:   but
BouND NuMB:   i closed my eyes
BouND NuMB:   and saw a cell phone
BouND NuMB:   and that on it
BouND NuMB:   the rest of the number was blurry
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   eh lol ur sorta scary man
BouND NuMB:   ?
BouND NuMB:   idk
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   im not thinking of a number
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   but what im thinking of
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   has ia nummber writen on it
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   Paper
BouND NuMB:   i know
BouND NuMB:   but
BouND NuMB:   do u know anyone
BouND NuMB:   who has
BouND NuMB:   741 in theyre phone number
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   the number is 741-734-7495
BouND NuMB:   holy bonk
BouND NuMB:   thee paper had
BouND NuMB:   741 on it??!?
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   yes
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   lol
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   and wanna know something funnier
BouND NuMB:   ?
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   ahha
HxH PwnZ U HxH:   my bros license plate has 741 on it
BouND NuMB:   man
BouND NuMB:   was that not weird

[Skippy]

Nodes' advice is excellent, bounda.

I'd also advise you to slowly immerse yourself into APing again. Maybe part of the reason you're having doubts is because you lost touch in it? If you start reading about the subject again and reading about people's experiences (if you have time) then maybe that would help you relinquish your doubts.

There are a few times when doubts vaguely cloud my mind, but then I read about other people's experiences, and I can't believe that everyone is either dreaming or lying. The only other explanation for me is that they're real.

[Stookie]

My opinion: For AP to become a reality in someone's life, you can't just hope for it, believe it, and then boom, you do it. You have to LIVE it. Your perception of reality around you has to change to the point where you KNOW that there is more to experience. It's not a hobby, something you do for fun (it can be fun though), but part of life itself. AP isn't a dream. it should become reality and change what you experience as reality. For me, it's been a long, slow process, mainly because it contradicts everything I've learned growing up. But the progress I've made is more than worth it - when perception of reality changes, life itself changes.