Where to go when you are lost?

[Karxx Gxx]

Before I begin, I would like to preface with this. All truth is truth. It is all relative. Even I dont get it much but I now know that's true. So everything I say, dont take to the absolute. I say it's all 80% true. You could argue and say 'well if you say this and that, then you contridicted yourself here'. This is why langueage is so hard to deal with. You have to talk relatively with words. This is why so many beings say it would be easier to just telecommunicate it so you can furuther understand. So just take it in. If something is confusing, i will explain if you are curious. This is my belief. And most of know that reality is effected by You, Beliefs, Feelings, and Knowledge. So I said to myself one day 'what can this hurt if it can only help?'

Hello all. If you read my most recent posts, it's out there. I felt like I would lose some information that I couldnt retain and I just posted whatever, knowingly it could leave quiet the impressoin.
But I digress. I'm going to post just a little bit at a time and wait for a response or message. All of this WILL come out eventually, but I'm relaxing and still organizing this informatoin in the simplest way possible, so lets start simple.

I trust we all have similar beliefs here,  or know it truely can be true. Or true on some level of reality, etc. So By your own belief, maybe, JUST MAYBE, this is some informatoin here just for you. Specifialy. What you are searching for. This is more true the more you believe in coincidences.

Ok, still digressing. So for those of you who keep searching for fulfillment, and feel almost there but far away, i suggest you listen up.

As said before, it seems everyone is influenced by Knowledge (idea, thought, etc)   Beliefs (which you can say is information you make sense of. how you interpret the information. I feel iffy by this definition but if you believe in something against any logic, the belief remains. ) And feelings. AND you which is a lot more tricky and hard to define.  You are who you think you are. But all along you have been raised by an outside source and influenced in many ways. You feel you have choice so you give power to choice, therefore it exists. Sorry for the complexity. No need to wrap your head around this yet.

So now you read this. What do you do? What is your biggest influences? For most, it is trust. When you trust yourself, you trust the decision you make. You always seem to follow trust in some fashion. As a kid, you trust your parents so you are influenced by them. You might not trust what they say, or do, but you trust them, therefore you tend to follow it. And you can say you trust yourself to make that decision.
My friends, when are you not more influenced by trust? I guess I could say, what beats trust? doubt of course. What else? Usually its negative emotoins. doubt isnt really influencal. If you doubt me, it will be easy and you will be on your way.

Ok, so what else? I'm not saying this is all absolute truth, for it is relative. BUT, In my opinion, FEAR is what will influence you more than most emotions. If you are about to die, you bring in that emotion and react to it. You say 'ok, I dont want this. I dont trust this, I will take action to prevent from feeling it'. You can run from it, observe it, play with it, cherish it, and so forth. But what do most people do? Run or Face it.

Once you face your fears, you can say you changed. You changed from being a person that would have usualy run from it to someone facing it. At that point of change, YOU literally change as a person. Your personality grows. You can say 'it was always in me. i just nevre acted on it' well then you were a person that didnt act on it.

So if you know that you keep being influenced by outside sources, where do you go?
My friends, one answer is observing. Assuming you want to change as a person.

And I could go on to tell you where to go, that's another topic. You choose. But the thing is, what are you basing your decisoins off of? Yourself. You trust yourself.
So when you say 'Ok, i surrender. I know I dont feel this way, beleive this way, think this way, but i throw myself towards trust.' If you trust yourself to trust something else, it WILL come back. That's a promise. If you go back to your old ways, you could say you never TRUELY trusted. This is why I think it's important to get to know yourself. If you are fearful that you cant trust yourself, you will look to another for information
'Man, I cant Astral Project. I dont think this will work. I trust it MIGHT, but i trust INFORMATION will get me closer.' And usually, if you trust information will bring you closer, you KEEP LOOKING UNTIL IT DOES BECAUSE YOU DONT TRUST WHATEVER IS HAPPENING. A lot of people do that, which is fine. People look to gurus for answers. They give them answers. They will either know how to trick you into beleiving what they say until you find your own truth, or you will half/whole heartedly believe them.

I cant settle for anything thats less then 99% truth. I dont want 100% because if  I did, I would be basically god. And once you are god, you cant experience life the same. A god cant experience being a human without being human. He can have every single emotion, thought, pattern in place 100%. But if he know's he is god, I would say he can never experience what it is like to be like most humans. He would probably just observe everything, knowing it's all right. Idk. I can only speculate as a human what he would do. The thing is, if he knew, he couldnt fully embrace the experience. So what does he do? He forgets he is god.
This is probably why a lot of crazy people and people who are india (who are more accepting of the idea) 'OMG, IM GOD' 'OMG IM JESUS REINCARNATED' 
All they did was kinda remember they used to be, for we all used to be, for we all came from one source, for we are all interconnected. For time is an illusion on some lever, for everything has happened. Well, not to you yet. Not to anyone. Not even to awareness. Because awarness would have to come into this plane, of time, and it might know 'this happens, that happens' it hasnt happened yet. So technicaly, on this plane, not everything has happened yet. It's such an interesting Idea. I digress...

So you have a similar trait god would have if he wanted to be a human. I'm not here to convince you, but this will give me some credibility because it make's sense. That's all im trying to do is influence you slowly but surely to trust yourself. But HOW? I dont want to control you 100% and say 'you know' even if i could. That would be taking more and more freewill away. It will still be there, but you are more me than you if i automatically made you experience what I did in a flash. That's no fun. If i did that to everyone, this would be boring to me. And I operate off certain beliefs. If you are curious, It goes like this.

0. Everything has free will
1. Everything will be experienced exactly how you want to.
2. If you dont want to experience what you want. If you want to somehow be a paradox, That is cool too. Trust will automatically come back. If you give yourself away and say 'I am going to LITERALLY experience something I dont want. I hope someone does help me. I have nothing else to do but trust'
And my friends, we are compassionate by nature. By being. We didnt choose it, but by default we act in that way for the most part. At least 1 person will, and that one person can save everyone because he cant take it. You need non compassoin for compassion to exist. And you cant blame someone for just being.
We have no choice but to take away some of that free will. To say 'OK, i cant take it. You were literally suffering for no reason and I couldnt bare to watch. Even though you wanted to experience this, my PERSONALITY ended when too much pain, when too many emotions were influencing. I KNOW and BELIEVE you dont want this. or you can say i KNOW and BELIEVE you do want this. But I dont. What do I do? I either help you because (insert reason) or dont. Either is fine.

So lets say you help that person.
crazy far out dude: "omg , I said i wanted to experience something I didnt want to!"
person who helped " I couldnt help it! I was just being me! I know you may be mad, sad, w.e. But you really cant be mad at ME because I was just doing what I do"

And that seperatoin is what allows connection, interaction. You are able to surprise yourself. To surprise yourself, you cant know. A lot of fear comes from not knowing. But so does surprise and many other things.

So now you say "ok, im picking up what your putting down. I'm lost, where do i go?"
There are infinite amount of answers. I can only say what has helped ME find MY truth. I can only pursuade you now. You might try some things out and see results. You will trust the syetem more and follow that trust because you want change essentially. When you want change, you change.

I will give some tid bits and leave it here for now, for I want you to find out for yourself. So I will leave with some closing notes that are fact.
YOU have ALL the answers  WITHEN yourself. If you think you are one of the people who fear 'omg, what if i am that crazy far out dude that didnt want to experience it? HOW? DO I WAIT? WHAT DO I DO TO GET MYSELF OUT OF THIS?' Chill. Breath. You have this. The only thing you can do is create. Create an experience to get yourself out. To contridict yourself right now and change. That is the power of free will. Your personality no longer wants this. You know this. Now, ask yourself where does power lie?

If you think it's others, you give them power. You are praying to be saved. That will work.
If you think Feelings, Beliefs, and Knowlede has power to change your situation, it will.
If you think you are forever doomed, you MIGHT be, until someone saves you.
So work with what most humans work with my friends. Feelings, beliefs, and knowlege. For they all influence each other if you believe they do.
You say 'what should i believe?'   
On the top of your beliefs put this
'I'm experiencing I want' If that's too scary, face it or run. Either is fine. Put another belief you might beleive more in and trust.

hmmm.. 'I trust myself'
not bad. or 'I will eventually believe in this system to work for me'
cool. And out of that arise new feelings and thoughts. And they might influence you to drop those beliefs.
If you are tired of being influenced, you can also do this.
Observe any thought and feeling that go againts your belief. Watch it. Once you watch it , you think it's not as you as much. When you think that, you give them less power, for you give power to what you believe is you.
You might get rid of  1 single thought and say 'ok that was my subconcious.' And once you do that, you dont trust it. Which is good, because you change you are making progress. If you stay the same forever, you dont change. If you dont change, then you POSSIBLE cant progress or digress. But you are always being influenced, so you change. And if you believe in evolution, that in 1000 lifetimes you will get better, you will. But you NEED change. Once you stop changing, and being influenced, and not reacting, you are changing at a slower rate. If you are fine where you at, you accept reality as is more or less. You are 'comfortable'. But sometines you have to do crazy excrement. Something you wouldnt do. Why? Because the more that is not aligned with who you think you were, the bigger chance you have for change. If you make a big change, you can either change for the better by a fast rate, or worse at a fast rate.

IF you believe it's worse, that's worth it. Why? NOW you know what NOT to do. So by process of eliminatoin, you find truth. If you do everything you can think of, you will then say 'ok, that is DEFINATLY not it. But I dont think any of what I did is it. But i did EVERYTHING? Because I dont trust that system FOR SURE, i trust everything else  just a LITTLE BIT more'

Do you see? Trust  leads to truth. You might go up, down, back up, back down, etc. But you will EVENTUALLY be knowledgable enough to not go back down again. UNITL you do EVERYTHING again.
Let's say you did and nothing worked again. Now what? Where does your trust go? You know nothing works. You keep trying and keep failing. If you distrust everything equally forever, you cant change.
REJOICE! for you are where you want to be. This is the 'experience what I dont want to' for a lot of people. You are getting what you ask for. But i said you have the power to break that?
O trust me, you will. Humans will eventually trust something , and trust will lead to thier truth. So dont worry. But now some might fear 'what if i die, what if i keep doing this over and over and over'?

If you TRUELY believe it, know it, feel it, you cant do anything. Someone else WILL help you, because we dont want to experience watching you do. at last 1 soul in the universe doesnt. Thanks to you, we know who we are. Thanks to that crazy guy, we know where our personality is. Where we are just being. Where we know, feel, and believe "I am taking away something he doesnt want. He doesnt want help, he decided"
But we cant help but to help. Because we know that if we watch you forever, suffering, it's because we chose to. And the pain is unbarable for most. For at least 1 person. And you will have NO CHOICE (aka, free will gone to a SMALL extent, but none the less, you wont have a choice) but to be helped. You can do it again, and the helper can wait 2x as long. 3x as long. 100000000000000x as long. But eventually, It would choose not to observe. To interact.

That is important. If we all came from 1 source. Why? WHY? To experience? SURE! but WHY? IS THAT ALL? No.
My friends, it was to play with ourselves. It was to interact with ourselves. We needed something to do, so we are doing. It's so boring to just watch forever. If you dont change, you are dead.

"what about awarness?! its always watching! what if we ALL are experiencing something we dont want. Then what do we do?"

This is where you can do nothing but make the best of your situation. If you wont get help, then you HAVE to help yourself. If you let that belief make you sad and such, you are giving power to that belief. There are MULTIPLE ways to save yourself. Know what has power and make best. Even if it's something you dont want to do

But I say this, that's a lie. As we change, we are changing awareness. If we are chaning what is observing, we are influencing it because it has new information in a sense. It's complicated. But it loves watching. It loves it, therefore we influence it. If it watches forever, It would have nothing other to do but do what it did before. Seperate from itself. SOMETHING will arise out of it, and if this is true, and goes on forever, SOMETHING HAS to change. Out of that is hope. Hope influences. I mean everything comes out of it, but if you BELEIVE what I just said, then there is the hope you are looking for. Pray, or do what you think you should do.

And again, another belief. I dont beleive in eternity. That's so lame. If something is forever, why even be that? I dont want to be dead. Dead on the inside, or outside. I dont want to be a computer. I refuse.
I could be wrong, but it seems I change when I have certain beliefs, and it has been working. Just my experiance.

If you really want to know my beleifs, then ask. I dont really want to influence that much. I trust that you will find truth if you want it. Trust in yourself to find it. Then trust in something isnt you to find it. It's easier to start withen, and trust you arnt everything you think you are. Well, it's easier when you keep looking for answers outside and not ever finding it. If you been doing this for years to no avail, you start to give up and trust much of outside influenced but yet you keep searching.
WELL SEARCH NO FURTHER. You found it. This right here. The next step is either to work with this and work with 'yourself' or keep searching. Keep following trust. Keep facing and overcoming fears. Fear is a good thing if you let it be. Dont want to spoil it though for you want to be suprised at how true this is 

Ok, Ill give one hint. I will list my top beliefs. I couldnt help myself lol. Or top rules as a god. Not a hypothetical one. No. As a god that experiened exactly what I have. As a god that doesnt go *snap* and money appears. As a god with a lot less power than what most of you would call 'god'.

0. Everything has free will
1. Everything will be experienced exactly how you want to.
2. If you dont want to experience what you want. If you want to somehow be a paradox, That is cool too.
3. I experiance number 1 and number 0.
4. HAVE FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
5. (inserts something that follows rule number 4.)
6. (see 5)
7. (keep doing this until I want to see how reality reacts)

[desert-rat]

If you can post a readers digest version I might be able to read and follow it.

[Karxx Gxx]

Eventually I will be able to further organize this. It can just go so deep with questions so I was trying to answer all of them in this post. It would be easier to see what questions arise from readers so i can better answer questions most people would ask. Like a FAQ answered.