I originally had this on another thread but seeings how that was about OBE, I thought best to move it here, plus didn't want to take over Mylenes thread.
Last night the hubby and I watched primetime live and they were doing a hidden camera experience. Here's the link for more info
http://abcnews.go.com/Primetime/
I just found it timely (seeings how I just had a dream the other day about men standing by and doing nothing for a child) that I was watching a show were most of the men did NOT stand up for any of the "victims" yet the majority of the women gave it naught another thought to jump in and help.
Of course this opened a debate between the ole` hubby and I...*snicker* Because he would never get involved even though he is six foot five and quite capable of handling things. And I on the other hand I am five foot six and am CONSTANTLY sitcking my...ummmm..nose in things (I didn't say nose last night but there are young ears here..)
It is like I don't even think about it, my body and mouth react before my brain can reason out the danger. Fortunatly through-out my life it has always worked out and no harm came to me. Though that one time with the girl chasing the guy with the knife was a tad tricky. Lucky for me my purse weighs a TON!
Anyone have thoughts and opinions on this or your own sticking your nose into stuff experiences to share? Loved to hear them.
Nay
this is not normal. There were 2 more posts (one was mine) in here and they just disapeared!
What the heck??
*stomps off the main forums to the mods forums*
Nay, did you notice the same problem? Or you are showing admiration for my post? lol
There are some elements of a person's Numerology chart that can describe how they naturally react to situations, and their natural first thoughts, the thoughts they have before they start analysing.
The initial outward reaction (called the Cornerstone) is indicated by the first letter of your name, and the first vowel gives a glimpse as to your inner reactions, your heart's desires towards the situation with. The "first thought" (called Rational Thought) requires a fill name and date of birth so it's not easy here to do.
In your case Nay, your first letter R indicates a selfless humanitarian, highly emotional with a great inner power. You'll see a situation and your first reaction is to make sure everyone else is ok. You'll also charge into that situation with great passion and little to no regard for self. Your first vowel E indicates that on inner level you react as an adventurous explorer. That is you're not afraid to emotionally invest yourself in the situation, and you have an ability to explore different possibilities, not just get stuck on one course of action.
So sticking your nose in (or other parts of your anatomy... hmmm mental images forming here) is something you will tend to do, but it won't be for any self centred reasons, you'll be doing so out of concern for others.
I'm almost the opposite. My initial reactions are firstly "what do I do, what do I do" then I'll take the lead and charge in all guns blazing, shoot first and apologize later. I do have a dynamic component to that, which just means I'll shoot in several different directions instead of just one.
:)
James.
Quote from: KazbadanNay, did you notice the same problem? Or you are showing admiration for my post? lol
I admired your post of course..LOL..And I am sooooo with you on some weird going ons. I posted again on another forum that actually has all of the posts.
I will log in and out a couple of times and it shows up...weird. I'll try again and paste and copy if I ever make it to that shadow forum again. hehe.
Wow, had I know that me quiting ciggs would do this to me, I think I would have kept on smok`n. :P
Nay
Quote from: James SThere are some elements of a person's Numerology chart that can describe how they naturally react to situations, and their natural first thoughts, the thoughts they have before they start analysing.
The initial outward reaction (called the Cornerstone) is indicated by the first letter of your name, and the first vowel gives a glimpse as to your inner reactions, your heart's desires towards the situation with. The "first thought" (called Rational Thought) requires a fill name and date of birth so it's not easy here to do.
In your case Nay, your first letter R indicates a selfless humanitarian, highly emotional with a great inner power. You'll see a situation and your first reaction is to make sure everyone else is ok. You'll also charge into that situation with great passion and little to no regard for self. Your first vowel E indicates that on inner level you react as an adventurous explorer. That is you're not afraid to emotionally invest yourself in the situation, and you have an ability to explore different possibilities, not just get stuck on one course of action.
So sticking your nose in (or other parts of your anatomy... hmmm mental images forming here) is something you will tend to do, but it won't be for any self centred reasons, you'll be doing so out of concern for others.
I'm almost the opposite. My initial reactions are firstly "what do I do, what do I do" then I'll take the lead and charge in all guns blazing, shoot first and apologize later. I do have a dynamic component to that, which just means I'll shoot in several different directions instead of just one.
:)
James.
Awww.. I didn't see your post right away. This whole alternate AP is messing with me..sorry. I did see your post in the mod section though....getting weirder and weirder..
Anyhoo. I love the explanation. :D Ironic thing is I think that my abusive childhood has helped me gain that concern for people that seem to be in the same horrid situation, or maybe that isn't ironic. ;)
QuoteSo sticking your nose in (or other parts of your anatomy... hmmm mental images forming here)
HAhaha...I knew if anyone got it, you would. :D
Nay
The best thing you can do to someone if you see a bad situation, let's say walking down the sidewalk. You go up to the agressor, be it male or female, and just glare at them.
I did this one time. A 6' 5" guy was yelling at this woman, had to weigh over 300 and very bulked out. I was in a cast from a dislocated elbow so I just walked up to him and glared at him and asked her if she needed help. And he starts talking rough to me. I stared at him, secretly scared senseless but this was worth the chance, since I knew he was really just a big bully and nothing more. He insulted me in my cast, I gave her a nod, and walked away. I just hope she realizes that that guy sunk to the low of insulting a handicapped person, who was only just trying to help. In the end the guy lost no matter what, because he was unwilling to change, and I hope I helped him more than anyone.
But no matter what happened, I think there are appropriate ways to handle any domestic problem.
For instance, I used to be paranoid about my current relationship because things just seemed a bit wierd when you first look at them. After nearly 2 years of searching for some type of truths, I suddenly realized that I was trying to construct a truth that I was unwilling to accept because of a pain that someone else inflicted on me many many years ago. I had to forgive the person who hurt me in order to progress, and it feels better, although I had to give up on much of the pride and respect I was holding dear to myself, and now I feel much better about myself, more than I ever did before. I feel special because I gave up on the logic of it all, because the bigger picture may not be completely visible all of the time.
Can anyone else admit to being angry because they are blind to certain things? I sure can, and it still riles me up when I know it's something easy but it just doesn't click.
Sorry Ybom gonna have to put you to the side for a moment. I got to that alternate forum, *does the lifing of right eyebrow thingy* Here is the copy...
QuoteI originally had this on another thread but seeings how that was about OBE, I thought best to move it here, plus didn't want to take over Mylenes thread.
Last night the hubby and I watched primetime live and they were doing a hidden camera experience. Here's the link for more info
http://abcnews.go.com/Primetime/
I just found it timely (seeings how I just had a dream the other day about men standing by and doing nothing for a child) that I was watching a show were most of the men did NOT stand up for any of the "victims" yet the majority of the women gave it naught another thought to jump in and help.
Of course this opened a debate between the ole` hubby and I...*snicker* Because he would never get involved even though he is six foot five and quite capable of handling things. And I on the other hand I am five foot six and am CONSTANTLY sitcking my...ummmm..nose in things (I didn't say nose last night but there are young ears here..)
It is like I don't even think about it, my body and mouth react before my brain can reason out the danger. Fortunatly through-out my life it has always worked out and no harm came to me. Though that one time with the girl chasing the guy with the knife was a tad tricky. Lucky for me my purse weighs a TON!
Anyone have thoughts and opinions on this or your own sticking your nose into stuff experiences to share? Loved to hear them.
Nay
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NodesOfYesod
Joined: 25 Aug 2004
Posts: 191
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Yesterday at 18:57 Post subject: Reply with quote Edit/Delete this post Delete this post View IP address of poster
I heard my neighbour screaming get off get off once as she was being bounced around. at the time I just dident know what to do but I went round there anyways and just before knocking on the door I asked god what am I supposed to do?.. the answer I got was just go In.. I knocked on the door a huge guy opened the door looking all embarased.. he was abusive to me and then I left. but just buy disturbing them it was enough to calm them down and stop it and I never heard another sound from them that day
sometimes you cant just stand by and let it go on. I knew it was her husband in my heart but it could have been an intruder
If you love all people you have a right to intrude to defend sombody
NodesOfYesod
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Kazbadan
Joined: 27 Jul 2003
Posts: 1094
Location: Portugal
PostPosted: Yesterday at 20:29 Post subject: Reply with quote Edit/Delete this post Delete this post View IP address of poster
If i saw a couple arguing against each other i dont see why i should interefere or, even worst, defend the women.
Sometimes i find such situations and later i will discover that the man is very quiet and peaceful and the woman cheated on him. Cheating its even worst than beating, sometimes.
Second, from my own experience, i know that when women are victims from their hubbies, they will do something very "funny": fly away from home and leave their childs with him...the easy way: run and get safe.
So, these days, if i see such scases in the street, i dont give a s***, BUT...i will try to listen to the conversation. If i see that the man its a crazy one, a guy that its always jealous, obsessive, crazy, etc, well, i may interefere, calling the police or giving a nice "present" to him (ya, kick his butt). Otherwise, if i see that the question its more complex than that (maybe the man its somewhat right, etc) i will leave things alone....i am supposing that there is no physical violence.
You know, sometimes women are worst than snakes. I see a lot of women hurting their hubbies in very subtle ways and in the end they will create an image of victims for themselves. That its very, very bad.
For that reason i will not judge when i see a man speaking in hight tone with her girl.
Now, if i see violence, even if i know that he is the real victim (being cheated, etc) i wil call the police orr interfere. Violence can result in death.
On some ocasions i will do nothing if my friends dont do nothing too. One day i saw a man speaking in high tone with his girl and being rude. He was smaller than me and i could fight with him with no problems, but my friends (stupid guys) thought that it was a funny situation and did nothing.
I asked for help: "Hey, come with me and lets help the girl" but the didnt care. Since there was no violence and the disucussio between the couple ended, i did nothing too.
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Nay
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Posts: 3088
Location: Georgia
PostPosted: Yesterday at 21:59 Post subject: Reply with quote Edit/Delete this post Delete this post View IP address of poster
Very interesting Kaz. Towards the end of the show they showed what women would do if they saw a woman pushing around a man and they walked right by....lol.
I have to say I'd do the same thing because just like you (of course opposite) I feel men do horrible things to women and the guy probably deserved it. Isn't that interesting that we both seem to have had bad experiences with the opposite sex thus leaving us with these little notions....interesting indeed. Smile
Nodes, I applaud you doing something. I've done it a few times myself, having lived in many apartment complexes.
Nay
PS.. btw, the actor was actually putting his hands on the woman...like shoving her and grabbing her jaw, stuff like that. Very distrubing for me to see. Had I been there I would have lost my temper with the guy... Embarassed
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Telos
Joined: 24 Jul 2004
Posts: 899
PostPosted: Yesterday at 23:58 Post subject: Reply with quote Edit/Delete this post Delete this post View IP address of poster
Intervening can make it worse. Even stopping for a second and saying, "is everything OK?" can make the aggressor even angrier and just wait until they're home to administer a real beating.
When it's a kid, it's different. Step in or keep a close eye at the very least. No question about it. That's just not something you ignore. But two adults? Unless they're ruining your family picnic, mind your own damned business.
But, then, you can't tell an adult by their age...
I was surprised by the shoplifting one. If you catch a shoplifter, you could get a reward!
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Nay
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Joined: 31 Mar 2003
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PostPosted: Today at 01:09 Post subject: Reply with quote Edit/Delete this post Delete this post View IP address of poster
Ummmm..this is crazy, but I swear that Kaz and I just came to the forums and saw that our posts had been deleted, I then went to the mods forum and posted and now that is gone...
I'm in between realities it seems. Razz I do recall some kind of "shadow" pulse awhile back when we had all those problems.
OK.. sorry to go off topic.
Telos, did you watch the show? They had some kind of domestic abuse expert and he said that if you stare directly into the abusers eyes, that is a good thing. It will show them you are aware of what they are doing, and pulling out a cell phone to show you mean to bring in the authorities is another good thing.
I'd like to hear some female perspectives, it is obvious that the ratio is working the same here that it did in their experiment.
I've seen shoplifters too. A couple years ago I saw some dudes swiping some glasses from the local QT, I looked right at them and laughed and said...riiiight..
and walked up to the register and told them that they were about to be lacking some sun glasses. No biggie. Smile
Nay
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runlola
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PostPosted: Today at 02:45 Post subject: Reply with quote Edit/Delete this post Delete this post View IP address of poster
it all depends... If I saw a guy pushing a woman around, I
would stop & stare. If he starting hitting her, I would call the cops.
I saw a guy run out of the store with a case of beer as I was walking in.
I was shocked. The guy at the counter said it happens all the time
& started cursing. Well, I didn't run after the beer...
A friend of mine got her purse snatched downtown, she struggled trying to hold onto it.
That day she was carrying an expensive item. A group of people stood around watching & did nothing.
She lost everything.
I think people in the city are conditioned not to get involved.
Fear stops people from helping....or maybe people just don't care?
Quote from: runlolaO. I just wrote it all over again but I wanted to add this:
Sometimes it's hard to look at violence being committed right in front of your face.
Some people just turn away in denial. Maybe they can't become violent or don't
want to. This reminds me or another debate a long time ago...asking if the witness
has a responsibility to stop violence. Is it wrong to do nothing?
*deep breath* I don't know if you are experiencing the same weird.....thang as I am...and yes, I said THANG, but I'm thinking you are. Sorry you had to write that all over, I did that...twice.
Why do I feel like I'm lost in a episode of "Buffy The Vampire Slayer"?
Nay
Quote from: runlolaIs it wrong to do nothing?
Firstly, I don't care if you put me off to the side, really ^^.
I feel that it
is wrong to do nothing, if you feel deep down that you should do something. However, if you don't feel bad about the situation, then don't interfere.
Nay,Now don't take this the wrong way, but standing up for yourself every single time just to stand up for yourself; I feel this is the wrong way to approach it. Take a minute or so and try to see how you truly feel about something. Quite a few times I've had to stand up because I feel like I should, and then at a later time I probably will apologize just to make that person who was all angry to see how to properly approach someone.
Ybom's Approaching Someone About a Problem 101Step 1: Do you feel like the person is going against your primal principles?
Step 2: Are you having a bad day anyways?
Step 3: Are you getting yelled at because you screwed up?
Step 4: Make sure you gather a strong counter together and approach the person, trying to only involve that person as much as possible, unless you absolutely need to humiliate them publically.
Step 5: Apologize to them at a period in the future when you both have cooled down, and then explain yourself if at all possible.