AMAZING n.e.w. results regarding negative emotions handling !!

[cesm23]

I know this is a long post (as always...) but this is a amazing discovery, this may even help some other people that like me are suffering from anxiety of emotional abuse from other people and absolutly can't get away from those persons... (even tough probably it's better have some advice of the persons here that understand about energy work in depth).

After months and months of daily emotion abuse and picking on by my boss because of the mistakes i do at work in a daily basis (which is my own oncle, this is a long story not necessary to give full explanations here, all that matters is that i am completly stuck with this job and i have no other alternative because of my autism/asperger personality, by the way he is bipolar and schysofrenic) and of several panic attacks and anxiety, along with very strong feelings of dread, fear and shame, since i have to contain myself to not respond to provocations, for the last months i got real desperate and start to search everywhere in learning how to IGNORE/ACCEPT provocations, "belittling" and scoldings without arguing back of feel very strong negative emotions.

Because ever since i got to this job i started to develop a huge phobia from angry people and yelling, and in top of this i have some phobias since a child because of being bullied at school (n fact i AM being bullying/picked on by absolutly everyone in my whole life, mostly because of the asperger personality i have so i am treated like a child even tough i am 32 years old because i interpret everything literally or in the opposite way of what the others are thinking) which causes me to always feel very strong feelings of shame and humiliation when being picked on or pointed for doing mistakes, and since my boss is almost like what it's called a "impossible person" (when he is on his angry mood, since he is bipolar and schyzofrenic) it's useless even trying to argue back it only makes him more mad, anyone that wants to keep this job has to learn to shup up and not fight back (one of his employies was already fired because of this before) no matter how unfair or provocative are the things he says. Also of course it's absolutly useless talking to him explaining that i might be asperger, he ONLY believes what he wants to believe and it's very very stubborn, he just thinks i don't do enought effort and that's all.

Since i don't even have chance to go to shrinks or doctors, ever since november i started making a very detailed study and dairy about my daily life, for example, i take note everytime i get angry, which situations make me angry or feel specific negative emotions, and also what i watch on tv has a negative effect on my mind or not (check this post : http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_spiritual_evolution/cause_of_the_so_called_quotbad_luckquotquot13th_fridayquotlike_days-t34252.0.html oh by the way!! I have discovered that after all this is NOT the cause of the "bad luck" or negative emotions i have, it was indeed coincidences), and also the degree of negative emotions i feel when i am picked on or provoqued by my boss or my family, because i HAVE to discover what exactly makes my ego so reactive, or if this is all influence of the tv shows i watch/videogames or even the kind of unsual sexual desires i have (which isn't necessary to talk about here).

Then a few weeks ago, during the daily bus rides i have to take to get to my job (they are 40m long) i had a great idea, why not start doing a "faster" and short new energy ways exercice to see if this has any effect on dealing with emotions? After all i already tried almost everything and almost nothing so far worked, except presence methods by eckhart tolle on "the power of now", that worked for a while but i have to constantly read his book over and over to keep my mind primed for this, to be able to remember to be present and accept the "now" all the time and this has to be done consciously and of course during a HUGE pressure job that this is, it's very difficult remembering this during the job because the provocations happen always by surprise when my boss sees i do a mistake or have any single hesitation.
So i start doing this to help me stop feeling such intense reactions from my ego from being scolded and belittled/provoqued. Since i am limited to 40m on the bus i now do this in a daily basis, NOTE that most of these brushing/wrapping mental actions using body awareness are done almost in a "hurry" and it's not very throught or intense, besides i have trouble fully concentrating on this, so i think that this training isn't THAT intensive on chakras as you might think :

- mentally brushing my foot chakra, then the whole foot top and the sole and toes
- wrapping the ankle
- brushing the front and back of my lower leg
- wrapping the knee joint
- brushing front and back of upper leg
- brushing hip joint
- repeat the above steps in the right leg

- mentally brushing my hand top and palm
- wrapping the wrist
- brushing the forearm, on the outside and inside part
- wrapping the elbow joint
- brushing the upper arm on the outside and inside part
- wrapping the shoulder joint
- repeat all the above on the right arm

- stirring action on the root chakra directly
- brushing action very slowly starting from coccyx and then up to the neck, each minute on a chakra level area (for example, i spend 1m brushing up and down a specific part of the spine near each of the major chakras)
- doing a brushing action very slowly from the body front, starting at the solar plexus area, then heart chakra area and then throat area
- a wide wrapping horizontal action around my neck, covering also throat chakra on the front, and the shoulders surface
- stirring action on the chin (ADMEITUS chakra) or sometimes brushing action instead, then nose point, then the 3rd eye chakra directly, then the back of the head (ERECHTHEUS chakra area), and finally the crown chakra
- brushing wide action starting from throat chakra, passing through chin, lips, nose, 3rd eye, then to crown chakra going in a straight line inside my head starting from 3rd eye, then back down to my back of the back and ending at the neck, and then repeating this action a few times quickly, again starting from the throat chakra
- then to finish i do a mental brushing action in a straight line between my 3rd eye and ERECHTHEUS chakra area, almost like there was being a imaginary physical wire being pulled back and forth, i have read some advice like this somewhere
- sometimes to conclude i do some kind of grounding exercice, altough i never noticed any negative side effects when not doing it (by the way i always have to do a 15m walk on foot to reach my job after i arrive by bus, maybe this has some grounding effect i believe)

Well, in the first 1-2 days i don't notice anything different, BUT after 2-3 days i start noticing "miraculous" changes, instinctively i start feeling less fear and dread when confrented with the phobia triggers (boss yelling or getting angry), i notice that in the first days this gradually improves each day, for example usually it takes a week of n.e.w. to me feel almost no fear or panic/dread during those provocations or at least decrease a lot the frequency at which they happen (since they never dissapear completly), BUT strangely i noticed there is still a lot of intensity of the shame/humiliation feelings even tough sometimes i don't have them, so even the frequency of those get reduced as well.

And that's not all i even feel some internal peace of spirit during the "calm times" (i mean, when my boss isn't angry) that i don't usually feel, and i start working better and faster, BUT of course those mistakes i do because of being asperger and having literal thinking that can't be helped of course, so it's almost impossible to completly avoid getting misunderstoodings from my boss orders, but at least i feel a lot more confortable when being confronted by mistakes even tough the humiliation and shame emotions are still frequently present frequently but even those seems to happen less frequently now. By the way the panic/dread feelings DO come back sometimes, but happen a LOT less frequently.

What is amazing in this is that this happens NATURALLY and automatically, i DON'T have to conciously try to be calm, or to remember to accept the present and the emotions, this is exactly what i needed, because with all the huge pressure i have to do everything fast and without mistakes and of course when the mistakes happen, my boss imediatly started yelling and belittling and of course it always caught me by surprise it's impossible to remember to not react, but when doing new i don't have to worry about this anymore, even tough sometimes i still react.

Also i noticed i frequently get small aches/needle like pain in my throat and heart chakras always at the front part of the body (not in my back) and even on the crown chakra, this of course didn't happen when i didn't do new), but it's always small aches so i guess i am not working too hard on them, somedays it's on the heart chakra, other's on the throat chakra and others on the crown, but fortunately those are the only negative side effects i had so far. Oh i remember now sometimes i also have a ache on the spine level of the solar plexus chakra or heart chakra, but this is rare.

And now it's the amazing thing, after 2-3 weeks, i started to get tired of doing this on a daily basis (the big problem is that i have a lot of trouble doing new in non-responsible areas because i tend to stay on them for almost 5 minutes because i am afraid i am "not doing it right"), so i tried stopping doing n.e.w. interely to see what happens, and you can believe what happened?? After 2-3 days of stopping doing it gradually it all came back to "normal" !!! I mean, the fear and dread emotions just came back everytime the phobias are triggered, and of course the internal peace was completly gone! This was by the way, a huge shock to me, because i was still thinking this was just coincidence, i never tought n.e.w. would REALLY be the responsable for the improvement of the negative emotions handling, and to be so strong to the point of being able to afffect that, because never before i had any indication that n.e.w. ever did any benefict to me when i did it a few years ago, since i never noticed absolutly no difference in psychic habilites or perceptions after doing it, not even in ESP tests, but this was the first time i starting doing n.e.w. after i got to that job, so this time i was able to finally notice any major improvements by using n.e.w. the problem is that they are ONLY temporary... I guess it's necessary to get SERIOUS on n.e.w. (for example do the full energy work exercices) for this to do permanent changes in long term? The problem is that it's still very tedious to do n.e.w. specially on the parts that are unresponsive, it's almost like a torture...

The goal of this post is mostly to know if anyone else had this kind of n.e.w. beneficts or if this is a isolated case? And also what you more experienced guys in energy work think of that n.e.w. routine, could it be done more effeciently? Is it too "heavy", since i am working at main chakras as well ?

And of course, most importantly, can anyone try a similar routine to see if it also improved their emotions handling ?

OH i almost forgot to say, after a week of stopping doing n.e.w., i tried AGAIN starting doing n.e.w., and amazingly the peace of spirit  gradually came back and starting getting much less intense negative emotions in 2-3 days just like the last time, almost everything improved the same way, i start having the same results again, it's amazing, it's no doubt now this is NOT coincidence it's really n.e.w. that it's doing this since i AM able to reproduce these results!

[proyect_outzone]

And of course, most importantly, can anyone try a similar routine to see if it also improved their emotions handling ?

This method is a bit uncommon, but you can be shure, that it works. I would call this method a combination of: removal of blockades and enhancing of own energy. The mechanics are similar to my methods for the blockade removal and enhancing.

[cesm23]

This method is a bit uncommon, but you can be shure, that it works.

Yeah i know that it's uncommon, i basically invented a "mini version"/shorter version of the full n.e.w. exercices while trying to maintain almost the same order, because the full n.e.w. exercices (for example, full leg and arms work) takes me TWO HOURS to complete (and of course, i am very tired at the end, i think last time i tried this was a few years ago and i was able to do it for 3 weeks in a daily bassis, and strangely there wasn't absolutly any noticeable sideffects, good or bad after that, that's why i stopped it at the time, even tough i know this takes time to work), and that combined with the unresponsive areas makes it a significant torture from my part (besides i don't have time anymore for that since i got the full time job), because i naturally tend to make extra effort and physical tensing on the areas that are unresponsive because i am afraid i am wasting my time and not doing it correctly, and because of that it makes this harder and longer than it looks, since when i do n.e.w. on the responsive areas of course i am a lot more motivated, but when i feel nothing it seems almost like i am doing a lot of effort and not matter how much i try to believe this is normal and that it will start to respond better in the future, i am very afraid it's doing nothing at all. Please if someone here has this problem as well tell me how to get over this problem...

I would call this method a combination of: removal of blockades and enhancing of own energy. The mechanics are similar to my methods for the blockade removal and enhancing.

Yeah but this thing of when i stop doing n.e.w. interely the negative emotions came back in a rush when there is triggers, is definetly NOT a good signal, it could mean that something around me or that i am exposed to is influencing me negatively, but from what i have studied so far in my diary, stopping watching any violence on tv or on videogames doesn't seem to have a effect, so probably it could be because i am surrounded by people that get angry very easely and that usually argues, and if that's the problem, obviously won't ever be avoided, so i will have to continue doing this for a long time, the problem is i hope i don't have to depend on this forever to avoid continuing living a life of constant fear and panic at my job (since i absolutly have no alternative to this job to be able to pay bills and food).

Unless maybe it's like i said in the initial post, it's possible that i have to get more serious and spend more time on n.e.w. to make this having a lasting longer effect, OR do some tweaks in this method, that's why some advice would be usefull, but maybe i have to find on my own, while i wait here for feedback.

By the way when i say less responsive part, i mean my right side of the body, for example my right leg and right arm, i have a lot more trouble feeling it energetically, while my left side is too responsive.

One more thing : another thing i tried several times before and that haven't done any effect at all where self healings using kundalini reiki and gold reiki, strangely n.e.w. worked a lot better on this that those healings (probably because it's SELF healings) despite this working well when i healed other people in the past using the same methods.