I attacked my animal guide :(

[TemperMode]

Ok. This is absolutely blowing my mind.

I think that I met my animal spirit guide. It was during a dream...

Night of March 25, 2008

I think that the dream begins here, but I am not absolutely certain. I walk into a house and down a set of stairs. Immediately as I get to the bottom of the stairs is a massive black panther. I start to back away from the panther and it growls at me a little bit. I make my way back up the stairs to the landing by the door. At this point, I am glad that the panther has not yet started after me because I am sure that if it starts now it will not be able to catch me.

I go up another set of stairs and almost immediately across the hall into that bathroom. I shut the door to the bathroom, but just as I am about to close the door there is a push and I am scared that the panther will overpower me. It does not. I manage to close the door and engage the lock.

As soon as the lock engages, I become lucid. Everything changes. The wall between me and that panther dissappears, but it is now as if I am looking at him in a black and white television screen (a little bit staticy) and it is a frozen picture. I think to myself something like, "Now that I am lucid, I am going to stand up to this panther and see if I can kill it."

I put my hand out and try to shoot lightning into it's head, but it did not work. I tried again to really believe that it would work and something happens, but then I wake up.

Immediately, I am dissappointed that my first instinct was to attack the panther and not to AP or go to the Lucid Crossroads. I wish that I had spun in a circle because that had allowed me to stay in the dream longer the last time I was lucid.

I got up, went to the washroom and then went back to sleep.

Later the next morning, I was still stoked that I had become lucid again and decided to thank my spirit guide, in case they had helped me. That was, of course, when it hit me.

Oh sh*%. Did I attack my spirit guide?

When I went to bed the night before, I had asked for help from my spirit guide to help me become lucid. I had also recently been thinking about what type of animal my animal spirit guide would be. I absolutely swear that black panther never even remotely crossed my mind. First of all, I am a dog person. So I assumed that there might be a chance that it is a wolf (but this seemed to be wishful thinking). I also thought that maybe it would be a horse, as I really like them and I was born in the year of the horse. A black panther just seemed a little too random (and surprisingly awesome!) for it to be made up in my mind.

At lunch that day, my friend told me that a black panther was a very powerful shamanistic guide and I decided to look into it. I suddenly found out that the black panther is a very common animal guide and was very surprise to find out it's main powers:

* Astral travel
* psychic sight
* the power of silence and patience
* Symbol of the feminine
* Reclaiming ones power
* movement in darkness without fear
* Death and rebirth
* guardian/gatekeeper of the void.
* gracefulness

The only thing that did not seem right, was the "Symbol of the feminine," as this panther seemed decidedly male. It had a larger head, which in the animal kingdom and especially big cats, is a strong sign that it is of the male sex.

I place strong meaning to the aspects of Astral travel (which I have been trying again for a couple of months now), Reclaiming ones power (I used to be able to OBE when I was younger, but have been having more difficulty lately. I also used to remember all of my dreams and I used to became lucid all the time), and guardian/gatekeeper of the void (was he the one that allowed me to become lucid during this dream?).

I am not 100% certain that he was still there after I became lucid, because of how everything changed at that point and because he was more like a picture than a realistic object at this point. But, I am really really hoping that I did not, or am unable to hurt him. I have also apologised to him many times, in my mind and hope that he gets the message.

A few questions:

Do you think an animal guide would be angry at a misunderstanding like this?

Why is it that animal guides are always cool animals, like panthers and wolves and eagles? Why not cows or pigs or stranger animals like kangaroos? Is it possible that these spirits have adopted these traits because of man's projections? Did man pray to these creatures and therefore elevate their status in the spirit world? I raise these questions because of my absolute surprise that mine turned out to be a black panther and that this turned out to be a more common animal guide. I just could not have seen that coming.

[markulous]

If it was truely your animal guide, I'm sure it would of understood your actions.  We aren't as in control in the astral(most people aren't anyway) as in the physical so I'm sure it's forgiven you.  And if it wasn't a guide then you need not worry.

[Blazewind]

I agree with markulous.  If it's really a guide, which it seems like it very well could be, it will understand the reason you attacked it.  It has more than likely forgiven you already.  In fact it was more than likely never angry at all.  You acted in the way anybody might have, having seen a potentially deadly animal suddenly in your house.  If your first instinct is kill it before it tries to kill you, that makes perfact sense.  Actually I would think that the animal might even have been expecting that reaction.

[lily moonsong]

Do you think an animal guide would be angry at a misunderstanding like this?

Why is it that animal guides are always cool animals, like panthers and wolves and eagles? Why not cows or pigs or stranger animals like kangaroos? Is it possible that these spirits have adopted these traits because of man's projections? Did man pray to these creatures and therefore elevate their status in the spirit world? I raise these questions because of my absolute surprise that mine turned out to be a black panther and that this turned out to be a more common animal guide. I just could not have seen that coming.

If it was your spirit guide, and if it's true that ancient people prayed to spirits and elevated their status in the spirit world, then I think you can assume that if you think your guide is mad at you, then it will be mad at you, and if you think your guide is not mad with you, then it will not be mad with you.  Science has not completely proven the objectivity of magick, and it may very well be a manifestation of the human mind, which many mystics refer to as the "higher self."  Your higher self is just a personified form of your mind that you feel separated from, but that holds deep knowledge and understanding.  Do you think your higher self would be mad at you for just a small petty misunderstanding??? I don't think so... so it's very safe to say that your spirit guide is not mad with you either... whether it be real or not...

it's not mad at you..

[andonitxo]

Well, the subconscious mind can be very tricky if it likes so. I prefer to call them totem animals, more than guides. For me, the real guides are people (or beings with people aspect). I tried to find my guide, and I concluded (after having dealt with many other beings) that it was a huge winged serpent. Anyway it has not been helping me in my meditations, and, added to that, I think that as we evolve our inner energy scheme also evolves, and so its mental projections (as the totems).

[TemperMode]

I prefer to call them totem animals, more than guides. For me, the real guides are people (or beings with people aspect).

Thanks. I was going to post a question about the distinction between the two, but instead decided to launch straight into the story.

I have now read that it is common to encounter more than one totem animal, so perhaps this is just one of mine. Perhaps, the black panther showed up as this was the totem animal that was most pertinant to the situation (I noted relevances in my post).

I hope I meet my spirit guide next...

[predawnglow]

No worries. The next time you encounter the panther, you will remember the previous encounter, and you will understand what is happening. You will not be frightened, and you will learn more from this next experience than the previous one. The panther has endless patience