Hello
My experiences don't feel good anymore. They are much different than what they used to be. Now it's like some sort of mission that I have to do in order to wake up, but it feels like it is there to teach me how to calm my mind, but I feel in danger and pressured by time, like the more I stay, the harder it gets to return in my body. I am taking anxiety and psychotic pills because I lose sense of reality in the psysical, and I'm wondering if those pills have anything to do with me having those experiences at night.
The first "mission" was to find a particular person. Pretty simple, but the trick was to know that I was supposed to do something, other than flying and shooting spider webs. I only figured it out when I saw that I couldn't wake up.
The second one was last night, and this is more complex and more dangerous. There was a big shadow monster who watched over a bunch of people working for him, perhaps slaves, including myself, and he was roaming through the hallways. I didn't know what I had to do, I didn't even know that I had to do something or else it would get harder and longer to wake up. Finally when I feared less the shadow monster, I found out that I had to start a rebellion, and that is by meeting and touching people or whatever, but if the shadow sees me, the mission fails. I failed a couple of times, but it restarted and when I got it right, I waited for like 5 minutes in sleep paralysis and it felt like I'm squeezed hard through a small hole.
This was after I woke up from a dream where I died in a car accident with a friend, and I was saying a prayer to not go to hell.
Could it be the pills?
I can't speak to the pills other than to ask if they are something new; if so, then maybe a correlation.
But it sounds like your experiences have shifted into a more meaningful context that requires you to be more present and aware in your experiences, and I think that sounds like a good thing and your responses seem appropriate.
Moving into these levels of experiences does demand more of us, on many levels. It is part of the learning. So don't feel put down by it, feel the challenge. Your reported experiences read very positively to me. Good work!
Quote from: Gizzytaz on May 15, 2023, 01:58:09
Hello
My experiences don't feel good anymore. They are much different than what they used to be. Now it's like some sort of mission that I have to do in order to wake up, but it feels like it is there to teach me how to calm my mind, but I feel in danger and pressured by time, like the more I stay, the harder it gets to return in my body. I am taking anxiety and psychotic pills because I lose sense of reality in the psysical, and I'm wondering if those pills have anything to do with me having those experiences at night.
The first "mission" was to find a particular person. Pretty simple, but the trick was to know that I was supposed to do something, other than flying and shooting spider webs. I only figured it out when I saw that I couldn't wake up.
The second one was last night, and this is more complex and more dangerous. There was a big shadow monster who watched over a bunch of people working for him, perhaps slaves, including myself, and he was roaming through the hallways. I didn't know what I had to do, I didn't even know that I had to do something or else it would get harder and longer to wake up. Finally when I feared less the shadow monster, I found out that I had to start a rebellion, and that is by meeting and touching people or whatever, but if the shadow sees me, the mission fails. I failed a couple of times, but it restarted and when I got it right, I waited for like 5 minutes in sleep paralysis and it felt like I'm squeezed hard through a small hole.
This was after I woke up from a dream where I died in a car accident with a friend, and I was saying a prayer to not go to hell.
Could it be the pills?
I wonder if it's the anxiety itself causing the stressful experiences. Pain can certainly mess with us too. One psychologist told me that dreams are like the brain going into defrag mode. There is a neurologist I sometimes see who researches the effects on pain and dreaming. I can imagine it messes with APs and OBEs too.
For me, dreaming and AP/OBEs serve a few purposes:
I am somehow having mixed up flashbacks of stuff that recently happened
- Anxiety/Depression/PTSD manifesting itself
Telling the future in symbols. For me I need to take apart all the symbols from the dream, shuffle them and then draw dots. I find myself having flashbacks to the dream on days they come true, and I'm left feeling "ahh, that's what that dream means." Usually it's on days where dreams stay with me.
Hope this helps.