Possibly gotten closer again

[Blazewind]

This somehow seemed more significant last night than it does now, in the morning.  I decided to post anyway though for whatever reason, likely because I need to get out of my own mindset of self doubt and criticism and assume that if something seemed important once, it actually is so.  Anyway, last night I was laying in bed listening to music on my laptop, which was on the nightstand near my bed.  I decided to experiment with noticing as I fell asleep.  I held some awareness for a while by deliberately counting silently from one to whatever I could reach before losing track and then instantly starting right back over at one again.  (I have no idea now where I learned to do that.  I know I read that idea on the internet somewhere though and I use it from time to time.)  I found I could get to only about twenty nine or so, which does seem like a pretty low number before getting confused, forgetting the number I counted last and started back over again, but it did lead to a bit of a neat state.  It seemed that while I was still very aware of keeping track of the numbers with one part of the mind, it sort of ran in the background, while all sorts of inexplicable pre-sleep images and ideas ran at the same time in front.  I consciously noticed just how fast the images flew and disappeared, because I knew the numbers were running at what we would consider normal speed.  Yeah, such a thing is impossible to really explain while typing and thinking in waking life.

At some point though I became quite aware of myself and the energy pulsing strongly through my hands.  I gained a good understanding that I could feel my hands and arms on the bed and under my covers (sort of,) but I could also feel my non-physical body's hands trying to really lift up a bit.  My feet and legs felt the same within a another second or less.  I had the feeling of eventually needing to try moving, but waiting another short while to see what would happen.  If I kept on going, I knew I would eventually just kind of lift free of my physical body.  I had to keep from thinking too hard or questioning and analyzing.  I'd lost count of course and I made myself start over again.  I've had a couple of experiences of feeling quite spontaneously and unexpectedly about to float away a bit not long after waking up, and this had scared the life out of me more than once.  This time though I was only again quite perfectly calm and collected about it, probably because I was actually doing this on my own terms and slower, so it wasn't too shocking or startling.    

I'm not sure exactly how I messed this up.  I just know I did.  Suddenly I was quite physically wide awake again, and was suddenly bothered by the fact that I could still hear music playing.  I got up again and moved to shut my computer off.  I managed to knock the whole thing off the nightstand, laptop, the cooling fan it sits on top off, a book I had nearby.  Big crashing noise.  I was of course half asleep and that started me good.  After I picked everything up and was quite sure I hadn't done any harm to the computer or the fan, I just shut it off like I'd intended to do and went to sleep.

I do think I might try this same thing again, the method of counting from one as high as I can, and just starting over, some time again.  This time though I'll do so without that computer still running or anything else for that matter.  Perhaps with no reason to have to wake up again to shut anything off I'd get further.  (?)                

[Lionheart]

This somehow seemed more significant last night than it does now, in the morning.  I decided to post anyway though for whatever reason, likely because I need to get out of my own mindset of self doubt and criticism and assume that if something seemed important once, it actually is so.     

Doubt will only be removed by your own personal success. Go into this with a air of curiosity. Don't pressure yourself. Just lie back relax, release, let go and allow whatever happens next to happen. Keep a Journal on all of your attempts, no matter how they go. This will show you what really works and doesn't work for you.
You are doing fine! Just stay the course! 
Good Luck and Safe Travels! 

[Blazewind]

Thanks for the advice Lionheart.  I typically journal my dreams on that old laptop that I sent flying last night, lol.  I think I will just make a file for OBE stuff to and start typing out my practice results in there.