New here, and can't get past the fear barrier!

[wiseowl]

Hey there,

I'm brand new here, and I have many a question!
But first, here's my story.

I was a typical straight A student until the end of my GCSE levels at the end of year 11 in school. I was head boy and had no particular interest in spirituality. I started experimenting with alcohol, and later on cannabis. I started smoking cigarettes, and through the smokers pen at my new college, I met a lot of people with a big interest in spirituality. I became a bit of an idiot, smoking several joints a day and starting failing my courses. Many arguments with family led to me off+on quitting regularly, but I'd always end up continuing. This April, I was really stupid and took a high dose of LSD after becoming very interested in what I heard. I had a horrendous trip, and then proceeded to have flashbacks every time I smoked weed. I went mental and doubted my existance for several months, and have only recently recovered fully.

Sorry for the drug background, but I thought it was necessary. I'm off everything now and have a very clear mind. The important thing is that spirituality kind of blew my mind. When I started dabbling in lucid dreaming a few years ago it didn't scare me, but now meditation, dreaming, de ja vu, OOBEs, and all this kind of stuff just scares me, making me doubt existance etc. However, after recently reading Robert Monroe's incredible Journeys Out of The Body, my opinion has changed. I realize that life is just a lesson, preparing yourself for the astral afterlife. However, my main issue is this.

When I used to lucid dream, I experienced the "vibrations" monroe often talks about, and I thought they were just a part of sleep paralysis. I ignored them really. But now I realize what they are, and I tried several times to induce an OOBE using Monroe's methods. However, I just can't do it. I get all the feelings, I know that I am so close, but it's just too damn terrifying. I always get so close and give up, trying to forget about it. I know that I want to experience it, but I'm just too scared. I know this is common as he writes about it himself, but I need a way to get around it! I'm just worried that it'll freak me out like the acid did

Kind of unrelated, I have a question. When people die and their astral bodies are in the astral world for infinite time, what is their purpose? Do they have achievements and relationships? Aspirations? Or is it something Deeper?

Thank you very much for your help,

From a very confused 17 year old Calum  xo

[Szaxx]

Hi and welcome to the Pulse.
Hey Nottingham. (I hope your at queens).
You really need to read many of posts on this site. Nothing lasts forever not even the astral body. Darwinian thinking required. You should understand this.
Have a read of the FaQ section for starters, some answers may help you.

[Lionheart]

Kind of unrelated, I have a question. When people die and their astral bodies are in the astral world for infinite time, what is their purpose? Do they have achievements and relationships? Aspirations? Or is it something Deeper?

Welcome tho the Astral Pulse. I would say your answer to your question is likely all of the above, achievements, relationships, aspirations and something deeper. Nobody really knows for sure, but all those things are attributed to this physical existence as well. Growing and experiencing is what life is all about, no matter what realm you may be in!  
We have a forum here just for people in your age group that I think you might find interesting. It's found here: http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/welcome_to_astral_chat/1825_ap_goers-t30568.0.html
Good Luck and Safe Travels!  

[roman67]

Welcome to Ap forums Wiseowl. Feel free to sharing anything.. Enjoy your stay here.  Lionheart shared a link for new comers who are 18-25 years old and I am sure that is a good place for you.

[Contenteo]

The way I interpreted the mass amount of Monroe's case study over time about the 'other side' was that they are very akin to computer scripts or in general routines. Everything is known so a portion of higher level entities take delight in repeating all of the same tasks that have ever been experienced. In a way, the same way something is needed to keep it in RAM.  It is almost as if they depend on this realm to learn the new 'games'. But to learn these new ways of experiencing we also have to deal with the pain and uncertainty that comes alongside our physical universe. In one experience, I remember, Monroe asked them if it gets boring. They replayed 'No'. IMO, this says nothing to earth shattering, just another notch in the staff supporting our reality is just a great balance of differential, much as in every discipline when philosophically looked at it. Function and Form.

Nothing to be afraid of. You're just taking the first steps out of your metaphoric house. A healthy fear is natural and a good thing to have at this stage in the game. I sure had one when I started.

I wish you best on your journeys.

Cheers,
Contenteo

P.S. I am leaving out the delving into the 'self portion'. My above explanation is the outward, not inwards. I don't expect you to understand this. This is more for the pros on this site. It is very easy to get misunderstood sometimes talking in this medium about such a esoteric subject.

[Volgerle]

Kind of unrelated, I have a question. When people die and their astral bodies are in the astral world for infinite time, what is their purpose? Do they have achievements and relationships? Aspirations? Or is it something Deeper?

I don't think they are. Many teachings and mystics or APers accounts also tell us so. We shouldn't confuse astral body with consciousness or 'soul'. The astral body is just another vehicle like the etheric or physical or the supposed 'mental' body which is even above the astral body (according to many Eastern, some ancient and the theosophic teachings). So the astral body is also a temporary vehicle for the "soul" / "Higher Self" to use.

I recommend maybe you read Michael Newton's books (or other similar ones) about the afterlife. He collected and analysed afterlife (life-between-lives, to be more accurate) data and draw a picture of the spiritual state focussed aroudn Earth life. Earth is like a 'school' for souls. We are here only temporarily. So to answer you question: Yes, there is sth much deeper and especially "higher" to believe in.

Here's Michael Newton and also Tom Campbell on the 'after'life processing:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QDT58Q6Zxo
(5 parts)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_RORIyVXBgQ

As regards your fear issue: My recommendation to people with this problem always is: Ask a guide to help you, also with the exit problems. It normally works. We all have helpers, even more than one.