Would like perspectives on early teenage experience

[xxuxx]

When I was 13 years old I was in the custody of a youth shelter (as my mother and father had refused to take me and the judge didn't want to leave me in detention). One night some of us led by a slightly older kid (also from the juvenile detention) in a seance.

Firstly, he told to lay on the ground, close my eyes and visualise a pentagram with the top corner filling with white light. I performed this for a minute or so. It seems that a child has so much more power for visualisation, my mind now would never let me concentrate that clearly and simply. When I opened my eyes a dragon-like, very terrifying face met me immediately, formed out of the clouds (it was night time). The face disappeared after the immediate shock wore off. We then used a coin as the thingy in the middle. I can't recall exactly what was being invoked or asked, but the other kid who was leading us soon threw away the coin and said that something had come through and he just said it felt like lucifer. I was as scared as any 13 yo would be, but not overly.

Later that night I felt a cold hand grab my ankle and weight came down on my chest. A struggled and was eventually able to move. I kept trying to go back to sleep but then something started poking me in the back through the matress; I was on the top bunk, and checked to see if anyone was beneath me on the bottom bunk, and every time I checked there was no one there.

I moved into another room and lay down on the lower bunk and something was still poking me in the back through the matress.

I paniced and ran to the social worker on duty and told him/ her (??) the whole story. There was also a drawing by one of the former youths on the wall in the office of what was clearly a fork tailed demon atop a very beautifully drawn pentagram. The worker asked if that was a picture of a demon or the devil and I replied yes. She screwed the drawing up and threw it in the bin saying 'he doesn't rule here.' It was said in the way adults say things to panicing children to calm them down.

I managed to get to sleep, and I prayed too.

Just for background: my mother once had a premonition of me drowning that actually came true. She dreamt that I was on my back, submerged in the neighbours pool, after I had wandered off during a visit, and that she was there but the next door neighbour was the one who jumped in to get me out. And 6 months later (I was about 2 yo) it happened exactly like that.

I've had sleep paralysis several times, and each time a presence is in the room with me, and when I was 8 or so my bed would vibrate vigorously sometimes...well, this only happened a handful of times but it was scary enough. I can sometimes feel my soul outside my body, and I'm trying to wake up, but can't. Once during sleep paralysis I was able to gain conscious control of my own rapid heart beat, and was able to slow it and calm myself.

When I was 18 I also experimented a great deal with LSD, mushrooms, datura, salvia divinorum (salvia was very unhappy about me stumbling in but was never malicious, just assertive), etc. Mushrooms have been the friendliest, and seem to protect me when I'm on them. Usually when tripping I attract huge incidents of really...aggressive psychic energy from strangers (really wicked looking people), but they never hurt me, actually once they see my eyes they generally howl (like a sports fan). It's weird, no one could hurt me when I'm like that. I don't know, am I dancing in quicksand taking these things.

I've also projected something a few times, usually when I've been really damaging my ego with psychedelics. I once projected a hand movement to onto a barking dog to twist its head away from me (I wasn't even trying), but things like that are rare since I'm not disciplined. That same day I could see my generally frayed energy projected and bonking with people I was sitting behind on the bus.

Anyway, I've shut it all down lately, and I'm trying to be an atheist, to forget it. But I can't help myself, I have to wonder, and well what do you think?

[kyo]

That same day I could see my generally frayed energy projected and bonking with people I was sitting behind on the bus.

This indicates intrusion. It's not really you, is it? It's being done through you.

Perhaps the following examples will make this clearer.


pg 408 & 409
http://infinity.hispeed.com/Heart.Of.God/SRT/SpiritReleasementTherapy_pg408&409.gif

pg 410 & 411
http://infinity.hispeed.com/Heart.Of.God/SRT/SpiritReleasementTherapy_pg410&411.gif

pg 412 & 413
http://infinity.hispeed.com/Heart.Of.God/SRT/SpiritReleasementTherapy_pg412&413.gif

pg 414 & 415
http://infinity.hispeed.com/Heart.Of.God/SRT/SpiritReleasementTherapy_pg414&415.gif

pg 416 & 417
http://infinity.hispeed.com/Heart.Of.God/SRT/SpiritReleasementTherapy_pg416&417.gif

Anyway, I've shut it all down lately, and I'm trying to be an atheist, to forget it. But I can't help myself, I have to wonder, and well what do you think?

There's no need to limit yourself by ascribing to atheism, or any religion for that matter. Be scientifically open to other possibilities, without dogma.

This is the guiding principle of the International Academy of Consciousness. You may like to check out their courses available to the public.


IAC publication - "Retrocognition - An Investigation into Memories of Past Lives and the Period in between Lives"
http://infinity.hispeed.com/Heart.Of.God/IAC/index.htm

IAC Courses (main) - Consciousness Development Course
http://www.iacworld.org/English/Courses/Core/CDPContents.asp

IAC Courses (optional) - Other (non-core) Courses
http://www.iacworld.org/English/Courses/Specialty/Default.asp

IAC Directory of Offices (International)
http://www.iacworld.org/English/Academy/FindingUs/Directory.asp

IAC Journal of Conscientiology subscription
https://www.iacworld.org/English/Shop/Cart.asp?sku=memassoci

IAC website
http://www.iacworld.org/



Take care,
Kyo
http://infinity.hispeed.com/Heart.Of.God/main.htm