ok, so as u saw in the topic, i kinda wanna die...i mean, im NOT like 'oh, my life sux, i just wanna kill myself and get it over with...' im more like 'omg, this is sooo fricken lame! i got a body that is soo fragile, too many responsibilities, to much limitation, and this is a waste of time....im sure i learned all i need to know, so im ready to die now!!! im done with my life, sumone else can have it now!!'
is there sumthin wrong with this, or do u agree???
No I don't agree with that. How do you know you know everything you need to know? I'm against taking your own life what ever the reason is. And I think one of the most important lessons in life is to accept life and live it. If you end your life now you will come back and maybe go though the same sh*t untill you learn. So NO. You haven't learned your lesson yet
I know how you feel I feel the same way... once I die it will be like freedom but untill then I wont be looking for it I shall just accept it when it comes. [B)]
Why do you say you have learned all you need to learn? I think if there was nothing left for you to do here, you would no longer be here. For me, you simply writing this topic indicates that you have lessons to learn. I'm as authoritive on the subject as everybody else (meaning i don't know or claim to know the truth), but this is my personal opinion as of the moment.
I know how you feel sometimes. It's like this flesh is a prison, and my spirit is bursting to be set free, but then i realise it's not like that. I can be free. In fact, i am free, i just don't know it yet. That's why i want to astral project. When i get out i can learn about things beyond my normal comprehension. I can soar in the sky and realise my freedom. The physical body is not a prison but a vehicle; a vessel to allow us to realise these things, and appreciate existence.
As far as i'm concerned, we are here to learn lessons, and i don't see dying as being one of them. I hardly see that we are here to learn to kill ourselves. There would be no point in physical life in the first place if this were so. When our time comes, death will take us, until then, we know there are things still to experience.
quote:
Originally posted by SmileySpirit14
ok, so as u saw in the topic, i kinda wanna die...i mean, im NOT like 'oh, my life sux, i just wanna kill myself and get it over with...' im more like 'omg, this is sooo fricken lame! i got a body that is soo fragile, too many responsibilities, to much limitation, and this is a waste of time....im sure i learned all i need to know, so im ready to die now!!! im done with my life, sumone else can have it now!!'
is there sumthin wrong with this, or do u agree???
Smiley,
What can I say... but you are so much loved and we don't want you coming back as a message!
Always look on the light side of life.
[whistling]
If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle. That's the thing.
And...
Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistling]
S
P.S I have sent you a private eMail. Check it out please.
Death is only an illusion.
I have tried to point you in directions that have helped me. Many people on this board have. What have you done with the advice given to you?
The limitations that you have only exist in your mind. The only limitations that you have you choose to have. For me it´s a matter of interpretation.
That your body is fragile YOU can change by changing your diet, your mentality and your exercise pattern.
The responsibilities that you have YOU choose them. It´s a good opportunity to learn to deal with responsabilities, and show you´re able to carry them.
Ofcourse life is NEVER a waste of time.
You should be gratefull for the chance and opportunity that was given to you to walk on this earth and try to make the most of it. maybe instead of you there could have been zillions of others desiring your place on earth now.
I think you´re reacting as a spoiled child.
quote:
Originally posted by SmileySpirit14
ok, so as u saw in the topic, i kinda wanna die...i mean, im NOT like 'oh, my life sux, i just wanna kill myself and get it over with...' im more like 'omg, this is sooo fricken lame! i got a body that is soo fragile, too many responsibilities, to much limitation, and this is a waste of time....im sure i learned all i need to know, so im ready to die now!!! im done with my life, sumone else can have it now!!'
is there sumthin wrong with this, or do u agree???
Hehe, actually I've thought that for 21 years UNTIL last year when I got into a weird state of 'enlightement'. That just changed it all and now while I'm waiting eagerly to die I still want to examine this world and the possibilities here.
This world has got so many possibilites that most fail to notice. Very very efficient.
We all CHOOSE to incarnate into these bodies to learn the lessons of the body. We each have an individual contribution that only we (each of us) independently and individually can and must do in order to fulfill our purpose in this incarnation. I say must because it is my belief that if we do not fulfill our purpose, we need to reincarnate again and again until we get it right. Unfortunately, we can only do our earthly work when we are in our physical bodies. Our exact perceived limitations are the exact framework we need to accomplish this work.
here's an analogy: I have a BFA in Interior Design which means that I am capable of taking an existing structure and knocking down walls, building upon, changing the entire look, feel, and purpose of a building to suit the current requirements for that site. I am not an architect. I find that using the limitations of an existing structure allow me to be much more creative than if I were trying to design a building from scratch (I've tried... they're BORING and I have great admiration for architects who can design completely interesting buildings.) The results using an existing structure for me are much more interesting and creative than they would be if I were given a clean slate.
In the same way I prefer to augment an existing, somewhat limiting, structure to create something greater for the new purpose it will serve; We have the same capacity for creativity using our perceived limitations here on earth, in these bodies. Our bodies and limitations are the exact conditions we need to express our true creative nature. You have everything within you to express your true nature and only YOU know what that is. Once you understand this, you will see your body as a fleeting gift which will provide you with the tools to experience the GRANDEST expression of YOU.
Kerri
eeb: The limitations that you have only exist in your mind. The only limitations that you have you choose to have. For me it´s a matter of interpretation.
You can ignore the limitations, but they are still there. Prove me wrong by flapping your arms and flying over here.
That your body is fragile YOU can change by changing your diet, your mentality and your exercise pattern.
The responsibilities that you have YOU choose them. It´s a good opportunity to learn to deal with responsabilities, and show you´re able to carry them.
I think thats the kind of crap SmileySpirit14 doesnt want to do. I hate that stuff too.
SmileySpirit14, are you asking us for permission? If you want to be somewhere other than this physical place, leave. If you can, come back and tell us what you saw. I hear a grenade in the mouth works well.
*Smacks Beavis upside the head*
Stop saying stuff like that! [:(!] I know it's your sense of humor, but sheesh man..
*Smacks him again on the way out* [:P]
~Nay
It is not my sense of humor. I meant what I said. Any place which coerces you not to leave becomes a prison.
Hey Smiling Spirit,
I've not been active on astralpulse a lot these weeks, only posted a couple of messages and when I came to check what you were posting this morning I find you want to die! ?
Of course there is something wrong with what you said. We always learned more and more, there is always something to enjoy in life. People don't take their life for philosophical reasons but for emontional reasons. Many people suffer on this planet, it is part of the learning. Who said that dying will be better? WHo knows what happened when someone commits suicide. That person might be re-incarnated and has to re-live all kind of experiences, maybe even worst than in the previous life. I know you are a strong person. Take the bull by the horn, revolte against what is frustrating you, revolte in a gentle manner without harming anyone or yourself. You don't have to die at all. Just by knowing that one day, probably when we'll be much older, we'll die all by ourselves naturally, then there is no reason to want to die now. I might say, OK, then just be patient. And any how life might a have many nice surprises for you, you are still so young. By killing one self, a person really hurt all his/her friends and family more than anything else. This is not a joke, it is serious matter to think about. People want to die because they cannot enjoy life the way they want. Some one might be in love with someone else and commits suicide because this someone else does not love him/her. That's the reason why people commit suicide, not that it is justified, but people who want to commit suicide it is because they need affection, love, they need a friend, they need someone to be with them, someone to love and someone who loves them, someone to share their life with, to share their talks, ideas, meals, ... The solution to that is not just to kill oneself, but to go and get to know people untill you find someone who might be that one person... Someone who wants to die is someone who has lost everything, except his/her reason, so that person need to find "everything" back.Please, Be reasonable, you know what I am talking about.
A prison with food from $20/plate restaurants, 500 channel tv, etc is still a prison. There are always things you cant do there. Who are we to force somebody to stay if they like something on the outside better? Do they not have the right to eat worms if they think it tastes better?
quote:
I think thats the kind of crap SmileySpirit14 doesnt want to do. I hate that stuff too.
And I think people who say this like to be the victim. People who don´t want to see things how they really are. I think they are people without a backbone, and maybe that´s what they have to learn here?
I have respect for the father who takes his responsability and goes to work from monday to friday, getting up early every morning, to earn money for his family. Mostly work in which they deal with people they hate, and doing work that´s boring.
Maybe that´s an old-fashioned idea, but that´s what I think.
And about the prison? Maybe some people are just not ready to deal with and handle all the possibilities that exist outside of it..
I´m sorry smyley but i will not give you authorization to die! No one in the forum wil let you do that, so forget about that idea.
There is a very strong logical circuit that is a goood counter argument about that idea ("i am ready to die")
you will only be able to die when you reach what is called (depending on religion) Nirvana, Illumination, Fusion with God. Now it is the best part: if you reach that ready-to-die state, you will be some kind of Jesus or Buda, or the like; your spirit will be so developed that you will be someone ready to help the others, and free their spirits. If so, you will not want to die, because you will want to be alive, not because you are afraid of death, but because you wanna help.
Similar happens with budhists. They believe that only after stopping with reeicarnation cycle you will be free. But they dont want to that until every single being is set free. They will want to live every lifes and will want to reeicarnate (it is a kind of sacrifice for them, to reeicarnate) in order to free other souls.
So, i think you are not ready to die and you cannot kill yourself. If you are alive it is for some reason. Dont kill your self. That´s "cheating".
Dont dare to do that. All the obers in the forum will chase you (in the astral) for giving you a lesson[;)] if you commit suicide!!
Now, in a more serious way, and about that conversation about "prison": our mind will always become prisioner of itself until reach the true vision about the nature of reality and, for more stranger that you think it can be, such thing will only be realised in your mind and spirit, not by AP or OBE.
This is kind of a heavy topic for Astral Chat so it now resides in the Spiritual Development forum.
What can I add, life is not easy. It is painful at times, and there exists human suffering. However, try and learn that we are interconnected. Especially try to help others as you live each day. That is what is both difficult and most important. Think about the divine that exists within you. My two cents.
Very best,
eeb: Mostly work in which they deal with people they hate, and doing work that´s boring.
You make it sound so great to be here!
And about the prison? Maybe some people are just not ready to deal with and handle all the possibilities that exist outside of it..
I didnt say anybody must leave. I said dont force others to stay against their will.
Kazbadan: I´m sorry smyley but i will not give you authorization to die! No one in the forum wil let you do that...
All the obers in the forum will chase you (in the astral) for giving you a lesson if you commit suicide!!
Speak for yourself. I said the opposite on the last page.
That quote demonstrates how evil human society is. They not only threaten you (with lessons, hell, reincarnation as a lower life form, etc) but they make threats from other people against you too, including people who disagree with them.
gosh, i didnt expect this many replies.....i got a ton of private messages....i didnt think it was that big a deal. everyone thinks im down and sad and stuff....im not, im very fine. its just im tierd of living. its boring and evil and cruel and i cant change that. so i dont want anything to do with it. im not going to kill myself, at least i havent considered it yet. i dont want your pity and i dont want u to think im feeling sorry for myself. im not a little attention-craving weak b*tch. i just feel like im SSSOOO done with this living crap and i wanna move on. i didnt throw yalls advice out the window.....ok, i did some, but only cuz im tired of the same stuff OVER AND OVER!!! its ALWAYS, oh, dont feel sorry for yourself, put up with it!' or 'get up and dont let others pull u down!' i HATE when ppl say that kind of stuff! i just want to know what to think of me cuz i dont even have a clue to who i really am and if im dead and roaming around as i please i can most likely find out. im very sure ive learned enough, and even if i havent, who says i still cant?
Life boring? Ha. Thats an excuse from someone who isn't trying. Unless you are like 80 years old and have done absolutely everything one could expect in life, you havent even started to live. Just cause the "astral" seems to be a better place doesnt mean it is. What common good can you do in the astral, except for selfish desires. People arent trying to tinkle you off, be happy that people care enough to say something. You can never learn all you can learn and do all you can do. You will die eventually, so why rush it. I hope you can find some sort of joy in life.
What common good can you do in the astral, except for selfish desires.
i didnt quite get this....are you saying im being selfish?
Absolutely, all you are doing is thinking about YOUR life and that YOU'RE fed up with it, and how YOU want to die. For just one minute think about other people's lives it would affect if you were gone.
well i have thought about it a lot. i mean A LOT...u shouldnt tell me to think how it would affect others b-cuz u have no clue about my life. plus, i wouldnt affect you or anyone else on this site,i think ur just trying to help, or just b-cuz the thought of suicide sickens you, i dunno. i just wanted suggestions on how i should base my final decision, but i shouldve seen this coming.....why did i open my big mouth.....
Well one of my dear friends killed himself this year and the first thing i realised was he just gave us his pain in dieing. Now i realise your talking about something totaly different than depression, but unless you have zero friends or family, which i doubt, someone is going to feel bad about it. I know what its like to see suicide happen personally. Dont feel bad about telling us all this, you wanted an answer and you got one, aside from beavis. We cant force your decisions but we can "advise". Its totally up to you want you want to do with your life. Just think about this though, despite your beliefs you have to admit that you didnt give yourself life, some god or the universe or monkeys for that matter gave you a life to live, and i personally believe that you should live it until it is taken away from you. Here is an example that i want to use, lets say someone lets you borrow their porsche. You would try and enjoy it as long as you can wouldn't you? I would drive it until it was taken away from me. The same thing goes with life. Just some food for though. The choice is yours ...
quote:
Originally posted by SmileySpirit14
.....why did i open my big mouth.....
Because you still have a lot to learn. LOL [:P]
If you want to know who you are then you must look within. You won't find yourself on the outside. [;)]
quote:
Originally posted by fallnangel77
quote:
Originally posted by SmileySpirit14
.....why did i open my big mouth.....
Because you still have a lot to learn. LOL [:P]
If you want to know who you are then you must look within. You won't find yourself on the outside. [;)]
Just before checking this thread this afternoon I was thinking of something at the other end of the spectrum to fallnangel77's thought.
Maybe SmileySpirit14 has brought out something in ourselves about what we may need to learn! I can certainly apply this to myself.
Thanks Smiley,
S [;)]
P.S. I wonder who the teacher is here?
quote:
ok, so as u saw in the topic, i kinda wanna die...i mean, im NOT like 'oh, my life sux, i just wanna kill myself and get it over with...' im more like 'omg, this is sooo fricken lame! i got a body that is soo fragile, too many responsibilities, too much limitation, and this is a waste of time....im sure i learned all i need to know, so im ready to die now!!! im done with my life, sumone else can have it now!!'
is there sumthin wrong with this, or do u agree???
I think I know exactly what you mean. I agree with you since that is how I feel myself for a very long time. Its not about being sad or anything with your lot in life or wanting to commit suicide or even wanting any sympathy or pity. Its just that everything is meaningless. You are born, you live, you die. Why not get it over with?
Everything you do means nothing. You go out and have a good time, what is the point to that? You eat five star meals (enjoy life), what is the point in that? You study, yet when you die you will be a corpse, they know nothing. You work hard, make ends meet, yet in the end what was it all for? It is all a waste of time what is there to gain?
Smiley, you are Christian? You should read Ecclesiastes in the Old Testament, written by Solomon. He was known for his wisdom and being wise, yet in the end he asked these questions also. I say this for those who would roll there eyes at the crux of this thread. We fill our lives with all these things trying to find meaning and yet in the end, what are they all worth?
Anyway, I'm not sure is that the way you feel?
haha this thread is f*cking hillarious, OK first off, beavis's comment with the grenad in the mouth trick is hillarious i couldnt stop laughing, good advice BTW.
Second, a person like you smilely, who'v i've talked to before, HAS NOT learned every thing in fact you have barely steped into the knowledge pool, and your under the age of 18 still, have years of learning still. and the thought of you say you want out of this 'prison' makes me laugh, my GUESS whioch is only a educated guess is that you havent even AP before? maybe the RTZ, but have you activel;y been out and about in the planes, if you have, you would listened to some of the people in here, your body isnt a prison, its a tool. if you have, you wouldnt be saying this mumbo jumbo, im not yelling at you, but I just dont believe a person who 'knows enough' would even say something like they wish to die because they'd except it when it happens, and enjoy the life here, because if you havnt noticed, we were evolved to live on this plane untill mankind learns(just like us individual learn by reincarnation) to live out our tool as we were suppose too. Not by wanting to die, and then having fun in the higher dimentions, youll be booted out soo quickly and born again you wouldnt even know what happened. So basicly, im tired and not explaining very well, untill 'mankind' evolves all together, enjoy the life here, and obide by the law that was given to you, which is learn, learn, learn.
But the grenade in the mouth thing is still funny
i'm still really pretty new here, and don't know any of you. however, i am dismayed by many of your inputs. i can relate to the original post - at times i've felt i've "learned enough, i don't want to learn anymore or perhaps spend anymore time...i've learned enough this go 'round." but that passes for me. i don't believe that in talking down to the original person posting, anyone will provide anything useful.
choice, action, inaction, experience, dullardness, all things we face daily, hourly. some of us are not "given" the ability to "see" as clearly as others, or perhaps to interpret or intuit as well as others. I would hesitate in making a blanket statement that just because one is a teen means they haven't learned enough. Obviously, through the rate of childhood and adolescent mortality there are those few who have filled their purpose here and have gone back to report, study, learn more and plan further progression. however, as a GENERAL GUIDE...there is so much complexity to this state that it would be difficult to conceive of an adolescent having learned all he/she came here to learn.
i would never advocate suicide. pls don't get me wrong. i feel it is a COSMIC error ... i feel there is too much planning in the physical realm for someone to accidentally stay longer than they are supposed to.
and even if we come to a point where we learn very much, we've not gotten to the part about, if we believe in carnations, karmic debt (positive and negative). and we only briefly mentioned the idea of (pls forgive the spelling) the boddisatthva personage who remains to help, teach, focus, guide, protect, and encourage others. perhaps as an adolescent you have learned all you can - i think you'd be extremely rare - but stranger things have happened - and perhaps you can then use your time to help those of us who are older and don't learn as quickly.
personally, i don't think suicide is an appropriate answer. i've heard it termed a permanent solution to a temporary problem. and in that i agree. i think speaking with one's guides, mentors, angels if you will, meditating on it would give you the answer you need. if you have learned all you need to learn, perhaps there is another focus to the second unfolding of your physicality now and you can be guided to it--then you wouldn't feel frustration, boredom, uselessness, "stuck"...etc.
but i'm new, not very intuitive, and only wish you peace of soul.
cristina
SmileySpirit,
This is just a hunch... but if you enjoy reading, pick up a copy of the Tibetan Book of Living and Dying by Songyal Rinpoche (that spelling may be incorrect) It is a classic and also a more contemporary version of the Tibetan Book of the Dead. I think you will glean some very useful insights into yourself and the art of Fully Living from it.
Additionally... Until you're about 25ish, life REALLY SUCKS!!!! After that, it just sucks slightly less because you do not have to answer to anyone but yourself but you still go through lots of sh*t... Then you die [;)]
Seriously, it is all a great learning process and it is my belief that we have all chosen for some INSANE reason to incarnate. I'm with you on the envying people who have passed... but I also know we all have great gifts to share and until we all are fully awakened, we all have to go through the same crap. The best you can do is live your life to its fullest while you're here and by doing that, you will decrease the amount of time until there is no more time (if that makes sense.) That is the ultimate goal.. not to have to incarnate anymore and have a fully awakened consciousness... when we no longer have to learn the lessons of the body.
Kerri
Some great reasons for you to do not kill yourself:
- make sex
- make more sex
- make even more sex
well, there are some other nice things of coarse, like learning in real time mode the kama sutra, make sex in group (with lots of hooot womans!!![;)]), etc.
SO, what are you waiting for?
BEAVIS: LOOOOOOOOOOOOOLL!!!
i haven´t read your post before my first one
quote:
Originally posted by Kazbadan
Some great reasons for you to do not kill yourself:
- make sex
- make more sex
- make even more sex
...
(with lots of hooot womans!!![;)]), etc.
SO, what are you waiting for?
That is being pretty presumptuous about a persons sexual orientation don't you think???
In Smiley Spirit's Bio, she has that she
is a HOT WOMAN [;)]
Kerri
Smyley Spirit an hot woman? Hmmmm....interesting.....where do you live?! Email me! I must to speak with you about some "interesting matters".....[;)]
i never said i was a hot women!...the only person whos seen me on this site is soden62 and pyro4571.....(sorry if yall didnt want me to say any names!)
btw, im not a full-grown women[:P]
haha smilely your a genius! haha man, i live in kalamazoo michigan lol haha. the tantra! YES
What??
I never really enjoyed life until I surrendered to it and started going with the flow of life instead of resisting it.
quote:
P.S. I wonder who the teacher is here?
We are all both teachers and students.
SmileySpirit
I don't think feeling like you want to die means you are not advanced, or are messed up in some way, or deserve condescending advice which implies that the person giving you advice has gotten past this stage.
I mean life is hard and painful, at the very least, sometimes.
When I read your first post it sounds disappointed, somehow, maybe angry, that life isn't quite what you wish it was. Maybe like that promise (that many of us feel) hasn't really been fulfilled. If you are ticked off in that way - and I get that feeling sometimes - it can be good to acknowledge, even express it. Otherwise the anger can turn inward and lead to depression and in the harshest cases, suicide.
I also don't think you should decide to live because it would hurt other people. That is guilt. And a choice based on guilt, well it just leads to anger and more disappointment. If I were your friend I wouldn't want you to stay alive for me. I would want you to stay alive because you wanted to live. Selfish (and this is not a negative word) reasons to live are the ones that matter.
Are you angry at God? (and even if you don't believe in God you can be ticked off at God)
What seems hopeless?
What do you really wish you could do? have? create? meet?
And I mean, aren't you afraid to die?
If it really is your choice to die that I agree with beavis - in fact I like a lot of what he said - that's your choice.
I also wanted to say that at one point in my life, after I had felt like not living for a while, I realized that there was self-love in this feeling. I wanted the emotional pain to stop. I wanted to stop suffering. And I couldn't imagine how this suffering would stop otherwise. It was a relief on some level to see that my urge to end my pain by suicide was at root ALSO self-love. I was desperately trying to find some way to help myself, even such a drastic step.
Smyley, how old are you?!You are a woman aren´t you?! Well, if your age it is between, let´s say, 20 and 25, please, come here to Portugal....there are some "matters" that i have to treat with you [;)]!
(me, trying to "get something" with her?......noooooo!)
coben: some interesting ideas to think on. however, i think you're coloring self-pity with the colors of self-love and i don't think we should attempt that. perhaps i'm off here, and to be real, who really LIKES pain (i can just HEAR some of the responses to that one); however, pity and sadness for pain and wanting it to stop are not self-love - they're physical and mental and emotional reactions to the struggles of life that you mentioned. To me, an example of Self love would be seeking a way to find a PRODUCTIVE end to that pain...not a grenade in the mouth and not a way out...that's taking the easy way out...and who EVER said life was easy and wasn't lying never existed. and having an idea of a plan (to your life's unfolding) that you can't see the beginning or end of because you're in the very middle of some AWESOME struggle (and personally, i believe also because while we wear the clay we CAN'T see it all...in it's totality)is not love - it's the survival urge to find a way to make it stop, or it's the spoiled little child urge to say "this isn't fair and it shouldn't happen to me" -- which is what we all go through from time to time...unless we're really up there advanced. you're correct about guilting someone into a decision, that's never correct. but neither is idly standing by and doing nothing. someone who has been in email contact with me recently, and i respect his opinion highly thus far, has used the idea that when we help others we are only helping the Self. The part of the tao about being inactive doesn't mean being passive and letting everyone around you run amok. it's about being "inactive in your head - meditation, focus, thought, clarity...to open up to activity. be strong and unmovable in your convictions-not thrown around by changing fad" and to borrow from the ...gita, ACT, but do not accept the fruit of your actions. As I said before, querying those who are teachers, guides, mentors, angels, whatever and then weighing it out is the best course, I feel. And I hardly feel beavis' comments of grenades and knives being efficient are helpful...sense of humor intended or not. i stand by my position that NO ONE IS LEFT HERE ACCIDENTALLY TOO LONG. They don't shuck ya here and forget ya. Finding a purpose for all that knowledge is a key ingredient. Being helpful is always good, but helpfully handing over the water bottle full of dissolved sleeping pills in a manner couched as "I'm not guilting you into a choice" is not what i would call Self-love, nor helpful. But that's my limited perspective. None of this is pointless, nor meaningless. One gains wisdom through experience. The human body is the perfect medium...that we're aware of... for gaining experience and the resultant consequences (no one can dodge the consequences of their choices)...leading to wisdom.
but of all things, i still wish you peace of heart, soul, and spirit.
cristina, im not 100% sure what u mean about pain and stuff. i get it, but im not sure if u mean physical or emotional. physically, i cause myself a lot of pain for seld discipline and i got scars to prove it. anyway, what u said about i shouldnt try to take the 'easy way out'...well is there a way to leave thats not the easy way out?
and btw, what the hell do you want with me Kazbadan???
what u said about i shouldnt try to take the 'easy way out'...well is there a way to leave thats not the easy way out?
I like how u said that. They dont care if its easy or hard. They only care which choice you make.
Kazbadan wants you to polish his knob [xx(]
Oh..I was hoping you didn't go there Beavis...and what did you do? You WENT there! and now I have to pretend that I'm not laughing my arse off...
Nay [;)]
Christina,
to me you jump to fast to fixing the problem. This person feels bad. You want them to be productive, make plans, etc, avoid what you call self-pity. But that pressure to go from the hard feelings to be productive is generally a lack of acceptance for the feelings. The first thing feelings want is to know that they are OK, then if possible that they are in response to something real. I want to know that my feelings 'fit' in some way, even if I am drawing false conclusions from them.
If I am suffering about a loss, I don't want people to tell me I should be productive, I should try to find a new girlfriend, start planning to find a new job, whatever. What seems like helpful advice is really a pressure to move out of the feelings and into action.
I don't think you realize how much judgement can hide in that seemingly innocent word 'productive'.
If your reaction is to feel like the other person is stuck in their self-pity, sure I can understand getting ticked (which can also be loving) and urging them to get on with it. But I think in general there is a lot of fear about the so called 'negative' emotions adn people are prodded in general to get out of their emotions faster than is healthy - and this latter by many new age philosophies, which, if you really feel them, often judge emotions quite heavily.
I said ALSO self-love, by the way. I think there were other processes involved when I felt like ending my life. But there was a central gem in the middle.
I missed beavis's post about grenades and I still haven't read it so I won't comment. What I liked about his posts was his real willingness to allow another being their freedom and the way he smelled the pomposity and condescension in some of the other replies here.
I think the way you view certain reactions as a 'spoiled little child' may show your own judgements of perfectly natural reactions to how hard life is, how it does not match the promise some of us feel was made, and what is actually possible for life on earth. I think on some level you have taken for granted that life has to be like this and therefore the best strategy is to transcend the natural reactions that tell us this is not right. However if the world could be a much better place, transcending those emotions and jumping to be productive before having found the deep truths in those reactions to reality as it is now can slow down the process of evolution towards a world we would not suffer in so deeply.
That of course is your choice. I am not sure if it is Smiley Spirit's.
It certainly is not mine.
coben: hi. i feel that i didn't properly explain "being productive". analyzing the feelings is being productive. wallowing in them is one aspect of "being productive", but it seems to me that it tends to breed an aspect of ones' Self that calls to others who would use that against your Self. So I'm sorry if my use of "being productive" came off as negating feelings. Feelings are essential, they can bring incomparable insights if allowed. "Being productive" is also meditating on a situation, asking for insight, and of course, struggling with those emotions. I know the feelings of not feeling at a certain time that "this" is not what I bargained for and I don't want it. I, too, have had horrible things happen in my life - and I've had to go through all the emotions of them, and for me the hardest part is putting some faith into the idea that "at some point I will come to understand that all this happened at its correct time for a correct reason." I wasn't intending to imply that one negate one's feelings. If that is how it came across, for that I apologize.
However, Smiley said she didn't feel bad. She wanted to enjoy the next phase. And I can also relate to that, too. Who hasn't wanted to participate in a "society" that is fair, beautfil, hopeful, endlessly awash in approval and growth opportunities? That WOULD be ideal. But a great portion of that can come in the here and now as well.
And mourning, grief, etc. (your reference to feeling bad or negative emotions) are natural and a process and part of a process. I just hoped to be able to show a difference between self-pity (the reference to the "spoiled little child response of it's not fair"--meaning a reaction to not being able to see the entire picture and wanting the "frame to change" through no action on our part to change it. And production in that case may be as simple as recognizing the feelings and meditating on them. If one has a Christan bend, the verse "Be still, and know that I Am" is deeply more than just "stop worrying and let me handle it." Being still is being productive.
And I believe that as long as we're not harming animals, children, or the otherwise defenseless we are free to make our own choices. We, actually are free to harm those I mentioned, but I don't believe it would be a wise choice. So ... if we got off on a wrong foot, again I will offer my apologies. I only wished that the idea of "productive" could be seen as "being still" and contemplating.
Life IS hard. I agree with you, and we all, I guess, have times when we feel it's not what we wanted. Perhaps I DO take for granted that it will be hard...i feel it's part and parcel. We have tough things to make us grow. And distance from them that only comes with time can perhaps clear out the "what really happened" and the natural emotions that came with them and allow a time and a place for "productive reflection" on how we grew from that experience.
"If I am suffering about a loss, I don't want people to tell me I should be productive, I should try to find a new girlfriend, start planning to find a new job, whatever. What seems like helpful advice is really a pressure to move out of the feelings and into action." Here I agree with you...but that's a different "productive" than I meant.
However, I only wish for her and for all peace, growth, prosperity in understanding, and joy. But I've gone on long enough. Thank you for challenging me. Smiley, there are easy ways out, but i don't want to talk about them. Beavis has a great gift for handing that advice out.
quote:
Originally posted by beavis
Kazbadan wants you to polish his knob [xx(]
looooooooool!!!![:D][:D]
Beavis you are insane!! looool!
Smiley: i was just kiding with you! I was pretending that you interested me in some way, trying to have some fun, because fun and good humour are spicery very important to life!
Sorry if i shocked you on any way.
Direct advice
Suffering is the fun of life, otherwise it would be boring. Get a challenge or a hobby or a change of scenery. Get out of your rut.
Sociology lesson
Suicide rates are generaly high in countries where the welfare state is most complete in taking care of us. Do poor Africans in aids ridden countries with civil wars get depressed and kill themselves? Actually maybe I am wrong there but I have read that more and more teenagers due to the increasing confusion due to too many choices and deterioration of family life, moral traditions, etc. take their lives. In traditional cultures this was not the case as people had fear of hurting a larger family clan and of consequences in the after life. all these barriers have now been eliminated and sometimes nowadays people in big cities in our industrial world have no beliefs and no friends or family so that whatever they do is their decision and nobody could care less.
Philosophy course
You are who you are and were never anybody else for all eternity and all this is just an illusion, so just play like you are in "the matrix" and realize the illusion and then you can free yourself from the boredom of the routine(which is really just an internal numbness due to a lack of awareness of the beauty of every moment) and find purpose in the reality that everything only exists in your mind for you as a dream. Create your own reality. Play with your consciousness. Then you will feel a freedom from the prison of the routine of your self imposed mental habits. There is no place better than this earth. The astral plane and heaven are just further illusions where the soul invents new games like in a computer game to keep itself occupied but the basics stay the same. To quote John Lennon "Love is the answer and I know that for sure".
Buddhist type Quote from an e-book I posted on the forums (Mindfulness)which seems really deep and appropriate-
One who has clear and direct vision, stirred to a sense of urgency (samvega) by things which are deeply moving, will experience a release of energy and courage enabling him to break through his timid hesitations and his rigid routine of life and thought. If that sense of urgency is kept alive, it will bestow the earnestness and persistence required for the work of liberation.
Thus said the teachers of old:
"This very world here is our field of action.
It harbors the unfoldment of the holy path,
And many things to break complacency,
Be stirred by things which may well move the heart,
And being stirred, strive wisely and fight on!"
Our closest surroundings are full of stirring things. If we generally do not perceive them as such, that is because habit has made our vision dull and our heart insensitive.
oh galatic! beautiful! so very many nails on the head, so to speak.[:X] big kiss for clarity of message!!!!! woohoo!
Though here at journey's end I lie
In darkness buried deep,
Beyond all towers strong and high,
Beyond all mountains steep,
Above all shadows rides the Sun
And stars forever dwell:
I will not say the Day is done,
Nor bid the Stars farewell.
Blessed Be and Bright Blessings
That´s a beautifull poem, Wendi. Is it yours?
WOOOOW oh my goodness, what a silly post this(previously) was, [:O] The pain of ignorance, please forgive me hehehe [:D]
Take care
Reality
SCHITZO CONVO
fire snow wind rain, all on earth, earth cause pain.
even tho i would choose not to be here, i must sacrifice happiness in order to sustain
its not fair im treated like a puppet; i want to crush whoever sent me here to stay...
but why should i complain, when i can make death not even an inch away?
but what is death, is it leaving exisitance? because thats not where i wanna go...
but i was just complaing about how my life sucks, so why not give it up, u know?
but is it really worth losing existance and stopping knowlegde flowing through ur head?
well yes in a way, b-cuz its probably better to be dead
knowledge is useless...what is it for? i dont need it on earth, cuz eventually i wont be here no more.
...........
i found this and i was wondering who had the better point of view...they both seem kinda depressed, and they both had some really good points......
and if u care to know, i made an attempt 2 days ago, but it didnt turn out how i planned....
I just feel i need to point out one thing. I'm sorry if it's already been pointed out, i haven't read the whole thread.
You say you think you have learned all you need to on here, yet you are still asking important questions in other threads. "Satanic or not?" is a perfect example of this.
If you had learned all you needed to know here you would have been able to answer that question immediately by yourself. This leads me to believe this is not the real reason why you want to leave. I'm not saying it's because you are depressed or anything like that, but clearly you haven't learned everything. That's not a bad thing by the way. I don't know anybody who has, including me.
Perhaps you're just sick of the world, war etc and i would put that down to negative feelings. Perhaps not depression, but disappointment or anger or something.
Anyway, i couldn't possibly know the situation unless i was a friend or family physically connected to you. I'm simply trying to help you out. If i can't, so be it, i tried. I just felt like i needed to post this.
All i can say is the choice is yours, but be very careful and don't kid yourself by thinking you've learned everything and experienced everything. I doubt anybody has and maybe nobody will.
To be very honest I felt like this at one point. I've considered suicide and I'm perfectly happy. However, like I said in another post, I must be here for a reason. I choose to live on, however, I no longer fear death. If you want to kill yourself, go ahead, but I think you'll find life to be a lot more rewarding. A physical body might not seem important to you but you gotta wonder why you came to possess one in the first place.
If you're bored of living get a PS2 or something. You can do just about anything you want if you aren't afraid to die.
BTW grenade to mouth would be pretty stupid. I suggest driving at 200 KM/h off a cliff with a cyanide tank in the back seat set up with a gun pointed at the back of your head with the trigger tied with a fishing line to the steering wheel. (incase the fall doesn't kill you, the cyanide will, and if the tank doesn't bust, the gun should go off upon landing). Just the fall itself should be exciting enough to kick you into an OBE.
you know, i feel euphoric has some good things to say. and the point i'd more specifically like to address is that of no matter how long a person seems to "possess/inhabit/whatever" a body, they still say at a very ripe old age that they are FINALLY COMING TO UNDERSTAND THINGS ABOUT THE WORLD AND WHY IT'S HERE AND IT'S PURPOSE. (not yelling, just stressing that this is a statement made by very old ppl - yet seems to be one made by young ppl as well.)
Ghandi's addition to the back of the Gita states that it (the Gita) had been a help to him and he "grew in understanding" continually over the years from studying it.
I still think there's a lot more to accomplish and i hope you don't pull another stunt like you did. "that you tried a couple days ago but it didn't go exactly as planned..." that's a teaser to get attention. if you wanna say what you did, do it. but stop and THINK, MEDITATE, and as other suggestions, ADD SOME PRANA.
not attempting to be harsh...attempting to show that you don't have the wisdom yet you think you do. intelligence and knowledge aren't everthing...wisdom, too.
gravy: off a cliff with a cyanide tank in the back seat set up with a gun pointed at the back of your head with the trigger tied with a fishing line to the steering wheel
Better with cyanide in a condom in your mouth and shoot yourself with the gun as you fall. Pulling your fisning line will pull the trigger forward, not back, and there is no guarantee it will shoot at all.
"Pulling your fisning line will pull the trigger forward, not back"
I just assumed that smiley knew how to improvise a pulley system using one of the rear seatbelt buckles.
I have just spent almost an hour reading all the suggestions. Really what it comes down to are two choices:
1) If you don't like your life, just simply CHANGE it![:D] You DON'T have to end your life - JUST CHANGE IT! YES, IT'S THAT SIMPLE!!!!!!![:D]
2) If you want to kill yourself, at least do it honorably - just crucify yourself and get it overwith! [:(!](I know that sounds harsh, crazy, and ridiculous, but when you think about it- that's about how ridiculous committing suicide is!)
-----
P.S. - If you learned everything there was to learn here, you wouldn't be here - you would be an ascended master!
P.S.S. - You never really die, your soul endures forever, so why bother disconnecting this life from your body when you haven't finished doing whatever it is that you came here to do - you'll just have a repeat performance - and THAT is boring![;)]
P.S.S.S. - Right now my nephew is in the hospital, still in a coma, from trying to commit suicide because his parents took away his car keys to discipline him from something he did wrong. He revolted by swallowing two viles full of pills! He's only 16 years old![:(]How does that sound?
ah! omg, why did u bring this topic up?? it was supposed to die!! lol uuugg...ok, i dont try to attempt suicide anymore, but every once in a while, just cutting...cant resist[xx(] i did learn a lot from MONTHS ago when this was brought up :P i did change my life...sort of, its in process...i quit psionics[:(] something happened that made me stop believing just recently. dont knwo why, i guess the logic of why it could be fake got to me. (dont try to convince me its real either, i know the reasons why)(<--and dont quote me on that statement and say "then why do you belive its fake if u know it could be real?"[:P]) i just dont believe.
ANYWAYS! i have thought about getting someone to crucify me if i changed my mind lol im not doing anything with a gun, guns are stupid, knives are better [:o)]
what made you stop believing?
She knows its real but chooses to ignore it.
quote:
Originally posted by gravy
I've considered suicide and I'm perfectly happy.
That seems impossible to me. If you were happy, why would you want to end your life, i.e. take a risk? Who truly knows what awaits us in the after-life, for all we know, we all end up in some sort of hell. I don't believe what you said. I suspect you are not actually happy if you considered suicide. Maybe you don't know what happiness is? Not everybody does IMO, or maybe some just forget.
If you want to kill yourself, something isn't right in your head. Fix it. I'll be honest, I've considered suicide before, but that's because I was depressed back then. I felt no happiness, I only felt pain in my mind, so I wanted to end it. What held me back? Knowing the pain I would leave behind for those who care about me. I would be pretty much dumping my pain on them and saying "Bye bye, I'm outta here! Enjoy the pain and suffering, I'm off to the after-life now!". Sounds kinda cowardish to me. It could happen again, I could end up entering another depression phase. But I just don't see it happening, because I realised that what I needed to do was step up and force some change, which I started doing. You can't stay in the same spot forever, you gotta keep moving. I'm in the process of turning my life around. I'm slowly starting to experience new things. I truly believe that's the key to live, keep moving. Don't like where you are? Leave. That's the beauty of independence, you do as you want. Independence is what I want the most, which I suspect is the reason why I was unhappy as a child. I always wanted to be a perfectly responsible adult. Well, I'll make sure I get to that point. It's my goal. Then I'll be able to fully enjoy life.
Most people think just because you dont feel like doing something that many others like, that you must be depressed.
I can understand SmileySpirit14 completly.
Its nothing wrong with feeling the way you do man.
quote:
Originally posted by LogoRat
Its nothing wrong with feeling the way you do man.
Um, yeah, there is. I believe we all chose to live on a subconcious level, or at least we all have a task to complete in our lifetime. I do not believe life is meaningless and we're all here just to take crap. Killing yourself is just counter-productive. If you really want to kill yourself for whatever reason, why not stick around a little longer and try new stuff out before you go? You've got nothing to lose, since you do want to end it all. There's no turning back after you've killed yourself.
I say don't take life so seriously, just try and enjoy it as much as you can, but at the same time be responsible and think about other people. Some have mentioned this, but if you look at the big picture, we are all connected, so consider others before acting. If you kill yourself, you'd be dumping your crap on people who care about you, don't forget about that. Don't let your ego take over. Although it does serve a purpose, it shouldn't be completely dominating you. If it is, you have a lot to learn.
That is just your idea of what is planned and what todo here in physical reality.
Its like beeing in a prison and you want to get free, you find a way out but people on the inside holds you back saying that if you leave here without spending your time in prison you will get punished.
Yes, you can conform to a prison and live a decent life in there, find some rat to play with and have a good life in the prison, lift weights and sing songs.
But you are still locked down and cant move the way you want to.
You want to have more freedom and to express your unique personality in greater perspective than in a world full of zombies that just want live by the society norms.
Think about it, lets say you come to a dead end when you walk in the woods, you where planning on moving to your neighbors house, but somehow ended up in the wrong place, you can now decide to remove yourself from that place and walk another way so you can find your chosen destination, or you can stay there and accept your position and play with the things that is on that place.
Some people have a focused goal on what they want, and that might be to not accept their present place they are at and move on and find their place they where looking at in the first place.
I dont see anything wrong with taking your own life.
Its just a choice.
And i personally dont see any idea of beeing here in the physical at all, its a waste of energy.
But for me, i have something i have planned todo before i leave, but thats me,.. it looks like this dude dont have any and i accept his choice.
And btw, you can still visit the places you want to even tho you have a physical body in your pocket, its called astral projection and dreaming.
That is just your idea of what is planned and what todo here in physical reality.
I don't know what is planned for us once we die, but I do believe there is a purpose to life in the physical realm.
Its like beeing in a prison and you want to get free, you find a way out but people on the inside holds you back saying that if you leave here without spending your time in prison you will get punished.
Yes, you can conform to a prison and live a decent life in there, find some rat to play with and have a good life in the prison, lift weights and sing songs.
Well that's just how you see things I suppose... You see the body as a prison, I see it as a temporary vehicule for interacting with the physical world.
But you are still locked down and cant move the way you want to.
You want to have more freedom and to express your unique personality in greater perspective than in a world full of zombies that just want live by the society norms.
I agree, we do have many limitations, and we all play a role in some form. Nobody is acting like it's true self, i.e. the higher self. You can try to, though. Stay true to yourself as much as you can.
Some people have a focused goal on what they want, and that might be to not accept their present place they are at and move on and find their place they where looking at in the first place.
You can move in the physical, there is a whole world ready to be explored.
I dont see anything wrong with taking your own life.
Its just a choice.
And i personally dont see any idea of beeing here in the physical at all, its a waste of energy.
Again, I don't think we are here just to waste time, we are here for a purpose. Taking your life is a choice indeed, but it is a final one, at least for the physical realm.
But for me, i have something i have planned todo before i leave, but thats me,.. it looks like this dude dont have any and i accept his choice.
This person isn't even a responsible adult, yet you accept h/is/er decision? Bad idea. Suicide is final. Take it seriously, don't just say it's "just a choice" when you don't even know for sure what awaits us in the after-life or why we are even here.
And btw, you can still visit the places you want to even tho you have a physical body in your pocket, its called astral projection and dreaming.
For all we know, that could all be a product of our unconscious. Don't see astral projecting as the big picture, focus on your temporary life, it won't last forever.
i dont think life is a waste of energy or time or wasting anything and even tho suicide is just a choice im glad i didnt do it. im gonna die anyway and i can still have fun here. i may just reincarnate or cease to exist, but i'll find out eventually. i really dont care if i die, im not trying to prevent it, but im not going to kill myself either.
and no i dont really have a goal...well, i just want to go somewhere where i can do the things i want and be who i am around people who dont care, and for those who know me i hate limitations more then anything. but this isnt going to happen, so yeh...i really dont have goals. not yet anyway. life is just another one of those stupid things to tolerate. good is coming to you tho, even tho you may not see it
Everyone seeks happiness, in whatever form that may be, but we each have different paths we must take in order to get there. As you get the older, the way to get there will become clearer. Sure, you may take a few wrong turns along the way, but you learn from your mistakes and can always turn around and try another road.
We do have limitations, but that's what makes it a challenge, and that's what makes us learn along the way.
I used to feel soooo "down and out"[:(] that I thought about suicide, then realized it wouldn't get me anywhere always feeling like a victim! So I put a band-aid on my butt and got on with LIVING![:D] It's really all just an attitude change![;)] Once I changed my attitude, I conquered my limitations! There really are NO limitations, only limited thoughts!!!
Yes, lets forget about dieing, and think about living, then we open up ourselves to the many gifts and wonders of life![:D]
We can experience:
-Learning to love ones self!
-Discover the wonderful meaning of "true love"!
-Experience the profound miracle of birth!
-Weep with elation at a child's first step!
-Walk upon a spectacular glacier!
-Crawl through an ancient pyramid!
-Laugh with joy of catching a snowflake on your tongue!
-Sail over the Sarengetti in a hotair balloon!
-Watch the awesome display of a meteor shower!(There's a big one the next three nights, northeast 50-100 p/hr 2-4am!)
-Have a snowball fight on the 4th of July upon the highest peak in your continent!
-Feel the excitement of riding a speeding rollercoaster!
-Discover the fragile existence of a hummingbird's egg!
-Visit the spiritual ranch in Yelm, Washington!
-Draw on a 5X7 card, mixed it up with 3,000 others, then it gets posted on a fence backwards, in a field the size of a football field. Then allow the spirit of God within to bring you right to it while your blindfolded, while 3,000 others are trying to do the same thing!
-Feel the adrenaline rush of white-water rafting!
-Feel the appreciation of growing something in the bountiful earth!
-Enjoy the companionship of a furry friend!
-Feel the peace of floating upon the water, watching the clouds pass!
-Embrace a lover and get that warm fuzzy feeling inside your soul!
-Realize that you and God, and everyone, and everything is connected!
Well the list can go on and on forever, but I gotta go now and live![8D]
Personally i dont really care about the physical dimension.
Its a waste of energy for me.
So i can understand peoples decision in turning the switch.
I always think its kinda interresting how so many people scream at people that want to take their life "nonono dont do it".
What do they know is right for that person, what makes them think he is doing a bad choice.
What makes you think he is insane and do not think clearly when he wants to kill himself.
Maybe it is you who are insane and do not think clearly that stick around here fooling yourself into believe its a nice place to be in.
Now SmileySpirit14 chose not to take his life.
And for that i admire his strength.
quote:
Now SmileySpirit14 chose not to take his life.
And for that i admire his strength.
I'm sure
she will appreciate that..[;)]
Nay [:D]
lol, oki hehe
yes, i aint no dude, i got a pic of me on this site -_' but candie apple,.. aright, heres how REALITY is
-Learning to love ones self!
hmm...yeh, maybe for some people
-Discover the wonderful meaning of "true love"!
looking for love is worse then suicide -_-
-Experience the profound miracle of birth!
duh! everyone here has been born
-Weep with elation at a child's first step!
if i do it and if everyone else does i never get a congradulations for it
-Walk upon a spectacular glacier!
-Crawl through an ancient pyramid!
only gajillionaires can afford places like that
-Laugh with joy of catching a snowflake on your tongue!
in the future snow will become black mush from all the pollution
-Have a snowball fight on the 4th of July upon the highest peak in your continent!
once again, money, unless you're already there, and in that case will get pnamoneia or some stupid disease
-Feel the excitement of riding a speeding rollercoaster!
goody, i bet it'll give me more adranaline jumping off a cliff
.. must i go on
sorry, ignore that. had a rough day
smiley: you totally missed the point and thought only of yourself. witness the birth of SOMEONE ELSE. WEEP WITH JOY AT THAT SOMEONE ELSE'S FIRST STEP. And you, I'm almost CERTAIN, were congratulated on your first steps. Every parent is overjoyed at their child's first steps...
i'm glad you say you've decided not to die now. the cutting part worries me still...that needs attention. However, you have yet failed to get ithe idea that anything besides yourself exists... or rather, perhaps, that we exist (human-and-animalkind) to exist for you. I have a life wholly separate and complete from yours...as does everyone on here. we are interconnected in that we are humans...however...that list was not about you, mostly. it was about you EXPERIENCING anything besides the pouty, whiny, "I'm bored...entertain me" missive of a spoiled child.
yeh i know i realize that, notice the comment i made after that post?
LOL...love your new sig! It reminded me of another that I used to hear.
"I see, says the blind man, to the deaf woman, over the disconnected telephone"
I haven't seen you in awhile and wanted to ask if you were still in Cheerleading? My daughter (10yr) is in a squad and the first day...she cried.[:(] She is painfully shy, like I used to be, but wow! the next day and the next, that girl was all over it! I'm soo proud of her for stepping past her comfort zone. I have to say, she is the cutest in that little cheerleading outfit with her ponytail..[:D] but of course, I'm her mom..so..yeah.
Good seeing you Smiley! and hey...we allllll have our bad days, don't we? [;)]
Smiles,
Nay
I worked in alaska on a boat being a deckhand. It was hard work, mainly because I wasnt supposed to be a deckhand and after the original two who were, both quit and were fired, my boss and other workers treated me like I was the last resort and thus the season would be horrible because of it.
So through the entire I summer I put up with this. I worked quietly and allowed them to make fun of me when I made mistakes usually made because of someone elses idiocy.
One day I went down to the boat before anyone else. It was about five in the morning.
I was washing the boat off, and the morning was cold and gloomy, when I noticed I had accidentally sprayed a moth. Its wings were wet and it was waiting to die just twitching. For some reason I picked it up and placed it underneath the large tackle box out of the way. Nobody would be able to see it unless they crouched and looked under.
The day went by as usual, me helping our custmers pull in hundred pound halibut and getting yelled at when I directed the boat in the wrong direction. Finally the day ended and we headed back. It was about six in the evening and the sun would still be out until one in the morning.
After the customers and the boat captain(the owner of the fishing lodge) left and I was cleaning the boat I decided to look underneath the box. The moth was there, completely dry and hanging out. SOmehow it had avoided getting wet at all from the entire day and the sun had dried it out. It let me pick it up and I walked up the boardwalk to the top. I looked at it for awhile and then put my hand out and it flew away.
It was a beautiful moth, pure white. It looked like a snowflake with wings flying off. I watched it for awhile then went back to work.
quote:
Originally posted by Aileron....It looked like a snowflake with wings flying off. I watched it for awhile then went back to work.
Great story and just shows how magical life can really be!
Congrats on making silver!
S [:)]
grinning
That's craaaaaazy, who gave the suggestions marked in red? Oh you made those up yourself, eh?! [;)]
Take care (you'il need that because it's friday the thirteenth, no I don't believe in that kind of superstition yet, oh well)
I think if you truly want to, then fine, go ahead. Of course that means it's really you, and not outside influence. Most people I've worked with on Depression are compulsive, or "not themselves" with depression and can't make a rational decision.
Besides, if you really want to then go. Take your soul, cut the chord and leave. If you have that ability, then you have enough understanding to know whaen it's your time anyway. Otherwsie...
The hardest thing is first admitting that you hate yourself....sounds like your on the right path.... before your can love yourself you must understand the poloraratity.....
after that its pretty much up to your goals...anyone can really do anything...i'm still learning this myself... i was poor (without the the "r", as my daughter would say "poo", too broke for the "r". But anyway...I set my goals, I did those things on the list (except I missed my baby's first step because I was workin') and everyday I bless that I AM going for new goals.....such as visiting with a master on the astral plane....there are ALWAYS goals to strive for!
Dear Smiley,
If you want to die, then you still have lessons. You will die naturally and pain-freely when your higher self knows you are ready, because souls always don't want to miss out.
However, if you force death on yourself, whether to a small extent or through simple wishes, you are A VICTIM. Being a human is being a victim by most - opressed or annoyed by the smallest things. C'mon, why do we sink so low? Now that is the lesson, SmileySPIRITUAL.
No offense: Maybe you are self-denial. Maybe you are low on energy... Tired of being annoyed by the smallest things. Maybe you are too spiritual but neither grounded nor centered (required for higherself awareness).I don't know, but keep moving on. Because I, am moving on too.
--
Enjoy the abundance life has to offer. Physical reality was created for that reason too. A very potential being put in a very limited domain, to be tested of zeroeth being. It deserves the outer domain when it thinks it deserves, but by first expressing itself entirely, not by boggling itself down.
Don't do it!
You have plenty of life to live,knoledge to gain & share,love to give & to recieve..
I have felt the way you feel..live is either
good,bad or boring but we don't have to give up on it.
Everybody pass by that experience at least one time in his life. There were times in my life that i felf very opressed and felt realy bad, i hated the way i was. I wanted to find a "cure" for myself. I wanted to search the tru person in me. So i found myself interested in things related with auto-hipnotism..
Well..that is only to say that, that period of my life was very fullfiling now that i see that i was capable to get pass over the situation. It constructed my personality and i am now a very spiritual and open minded person, and i just love the way i am now.
And astral projections gave me a all new perspective to see death.. i am not afrait of death but even if something in my material existence isnt getting well i will not give up until it is like i want it to be. If i'm not afrait of death, am no afrait of anything!!!
So whatever you are afrait of on this existence, be it you or anybody else, dont be!!
ok, so as u saw in the topic, i kinda wanna die...i mean, im NOT like 'oh, my life sux, i just wanna kill myself and get it over with...' im more like 'omg, this is sooo fricken lame! i got a body that is soo fragile, too many responsibilities, too much limitation, and this is a waste of time....im sure i learned all i need to know, so im ready to die now!!! im done with my life, sumone else can have it now!!'
is there sumthin wrong with this, or do u agree???