It's about how people (or the majority of them) are afraid of change, and how people are so concerned with their physical life. Should I post it here? I mean... Would you read it?
-Don
I would certainly read it. :-D
Awesome. I've only access to a printed copy so please excuse me while I re-write it.
The Paper:
By Don Nadzieja (If you plagiarize, I will take action.)
Note: It is (for most people) difficult to comprehend the first (if not second) read.
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Life is simply an illusion; nearly everything known by the common man is more than often composed of lies. These lies are mainly brought into existence by people with power, money, and influence. Generally, these people are unaware of their purpose - to distract the rest of the world from the truth, with factors such as material items and social life - and usually end up causing views of negativity and disapproval to be cast down upon the truth-seekers. The truth is, most people are terrified of change; of swaying around and outside of their mentally built up comfort zone, without the knowledge of how good can come from it. The majority of people will deny this constantly, especially when it comes down to them. Most people are so wrapped up in their precious "physical life", material items, and the social hierarchy. Whenever spirituality is brought into the picture, the voices of truth and good are muted, and the carriers ultimately deemed insane. It truly is a sad sight to see the majority of the world going down-hill so fast. But, despite and fear of changing, lack of emotional connection with divinity, or other physical factors (negative emotions, items, etc.), and regardless of the many hardships the soldiers of God will be forced to endure, we will maintain ourselves throughout; we'll stand tall, and we will prevail.
Many people view life as just a long, drawn out process of dying. What they fail to realize is the true meaning of life, and death for that matter. The term death is only applicable when one is completely overtaken by a low-vibratory entity. This, sadly, is the fate of a good amount of people. However, if even the smallest seed of trust is planted in the soil of divinity, life will most definitely prosper and thrive. The meaning of life varies from person to person, so therefore everyone's seed of trust is planted and cared for differently. Some people choose not to look after their plant. Those of us who do choose to carefully and proudly nurture their plant with love and purity are often, unfortunately, looked upon as crazy.
It is those who are pushed down and not heard, but keep hope, that will be the ones to determine who is a fool and who is worthy in the end. Those of us who do good will have the opportunity to have the last laugh, but will not take it, for all that is unfair will be justified, and those who are truly sorrowful will be forgiven.
What class was this for?
It was not for any class... I just wrote it for myself. A couple of teachers did ask to read it, though...
You might like this book. I believe that it was always an ebook for free consumption (so no copyright issues ryan and stookie).
A Dangerous Book - Roger Stephens (http://www.secondattention.org/ebooks/a_dangerous_book.pdf)
Don, are you open to criticism?
I am open to anything that can help shape myself for the better. Negative or positive. Go for it.
Quote from: donzieja on March 22, 2011, 19:37:04
... the soldiers of God will be forced to endure, we will maintain ourselves throughout; we'll stand tall, and we will prevail.... It is those who are pushed down and not heard, but keep hope, that will be the ones to determine who is a fool and who is worthy in the end. Those of us who do good will have the opportunity to have the last laugh, but will not take it, for all that is unfair will be justified, and those who are truly sorrowful will be forgiven.
some of it I even liked, but these quoted parts show that it is just a religionist 'fire-and-brimstone' dogma sermon which you can hear from any evangelical bible fundamentalist preacher, you just clad it into some "mawkish new-agey talk" :x
sorry, but I think you are completely wrong about true spirituality, this is not spiritual at all, it is that same ol' dumb 'us-chosen-ones-against-them-sinners-at-the-end-of-times'-talk
In other words: It's BS.
:-(
QuoteI am open to anything that can help shape myself for the better. Negative or positive. Go for it.
Don't worry, I like to think it's helpful criticism.
Quote from: donzieja on March 22, 2011, 19:37:04
The Paper:
By Don Nadzieja (If you plagiarize, I will take action.)
Note: It is (for most people) difficult to comprehend the first (if not second) read.
Interesting disclaimer.
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QuoteLife is simply an illusion; nearly everything known by the common man is more than often composed of lies.
Here are two claims. Whether true or not is not the issue- but what I see is that here are two controversial statements that are not supported. Now, by supported I don't mean proven- I mean that you did not explain how you came about these conclusions.
Usually it is fine to start a paper with a claim and not explain it right away (because it would then be boring) but eventually you have to at least let the reader know why you think this. I didn't see this when I read the paper.
QuoteThese lies are mainly brought into existence by people with power, money, and influence. Generally, these people are unaware of their purpose - to distract the rest of the world from the truth, with factors such as material items and social life - and usually end up causing views of negativity and disapproval to be cast down upon the truth-seekers.
Once again, I see two ideas- that the mainstream thinking is controlled by the powerful- I think this is self-evident, but for the purposes of a school paper it should be clarified- that is, people in power disseminate lies to keep their power- or some other justification. But I don't see this spelled out either.
I also see that you state that people in power are deliberately making truth seekers look bad, but you don't really explain why, or how. Or at least, not to my mind. If I were the teacher, I'd ask you to justify this position in some way with facts (like the demonization of wikileaks, for example) or some other (possibly personal) story to illustrate what you are trying to say.
QuoteThe truth is, most people are terrified of change; of swaying around and outside of their mentally built up comfort zone, without the knowledge of how good can come from it. The majority of people will deny this constantly, especially when it comes down to them.
I agree with this statement, because it is a known fact that no one likes change from a psychological perspective- but you have given this a specific focus, and once again, I don't think it's clear in what you're trying to say.
QuoteMost people are so wrapped up in their precious "physical life", material items, and the social hierarchy. Whenever spirituality is brought into the picture, the voices of truth and good are muted, and the carriers ultimately deemed insane
. First thing I would consider controversial- mainly because it is known that we need matter to be alive, and your demonization of it seems too 'specific'. You also state that 'the voices of truth and good are muted'- and this is too one-sided- What is good? What is True? And how do you qualify it? It almost reads to me as if you're saying that your point of view is good and true and anyone who disagrees is wrong. And then don't offer reasons for this.
I'm not saying this is true, I'm saying it's how it reads, and any teacher that actually read it and gives a sh-t about your education should call you on it, and you should be ready to defend your position with examples.
QuoteIt truly is a sad sight to see the majority of the world going down-hill so fast. But, despite and fear of changing, lack of emotional connection with divinity, or other physical factors (negative emotions, items, etc.), and regardless of the many hardships the soldiers of God
Whoa Nelly! You had me entirely with you until "Soldiers of God". Anyone that calls themselves 'soldiers of God' makes me nervous, because they see themselves divinely entitled to do whatever they want or feel is 'right', and this is very scary. It's how many wars have started. There are no Holy Wars, only Wars that call themselves Holy to justify barbaric action.
Quotewill be forced to endure, we will maintain ourselves throughout; we'll stand tall, and we will prevail.
....
QuoteMany people view life as just a long, drawn out process of dying. What they fail to realize is the true meaning of life, and death for that matter. The term death is only applicable when one is completely overtaken by a low-vibratory entity. This, sadly, is the fate of a good amount of people. However, if even the smallest seed of trust is planted in the soil of divinity, life will most definitely prosper and thrive. The meaning of life varies from person to person, so therefore everyone's seed of trust is planted and cared for differently. Some people choose not to look after their plant. Those of us who do choose to carefully and proudly nurture their plant with love and purity are often, unfortunately, looked upon as crazy.
Although I agree with this premise, it is too specific 'low vibratory entity' and doesn't really explain what you mean.
QuoteIt is those who are pushed down and not heard, but keep hope, that will be the ones to determine who is a fool and who is worthy in the end. Those of us who do good will have the opportunity to have the last laugh, but will not take it, for all that is unfair will be justified, and those who are truly sorrowful will be forgiven.
This is a little vague, after being specific earlier- who will forgive the 'truly sorrowful'? And why sorrowful, and not, for example, self-aware?
I hope you take this criticism as how it's meant- to help you clarify your position and have it come across in the work you have done so far.
Quote from: Volgerle on March 23, 2011, 14:00:45
some of it I even liked, but these quoted parts show that it is just a religionist 'fire-and-brimstone' dogma sermon which you can hear from any evangelical bible fundamentalist preacher, you just clad it into some "mawkish new-agey talk" :x
sorry, but I think you are completely wrong about true spirituality, this is not spiritual at all, it is that same ol' dumb 'us-chosen-ones-against-them-sinners-at-the-end-of-times'-talk
In other words: It's BS.
:-(
I have to agree. By the tone of this paper I'd suggest you were looking for a fight. Being on the offense is a surefire way to get people on the defense about their beliefs. They won't even think to consider yours, and I wouldn't blame them. The spirit of the physical is to engage in the physical. You make it sound like doing anything outside of living an ascetic lifestyle is hazardous to the soul. I can tell you have a lot to learn, bro.
Well. I thank you all for your criticism. I'm only 17 and I wrote this in a matter of 1 hour, by the way. I also was not looking for a fight... :-D
Sorry if I've offended any of you. I kind of feel moronic, but that's just my paranoia... I guess.
Anyways, thanks for the opinions. I agree that I do have "a lot to learn".
-Don
What I guess I was truly trying to get across was how most people like me who are interested in astral projection, etc. are called insane on a daily basis... maybe it's just me. I'm not blaming others for my insanity, but I'm blaming them for my confusion of whether I'm insane or not. I am also a very sensitive person, so I really can't believe I didn't see myself setting myself up for this disaster. I'm interested in learning what you all have to say, so go ahead. Just please don't purposely hurt me. I'm assuming we're all mature enough here to know that, but I'm just making sure.
Quote from: donzieja on March 23, 2011, 16:00:15
Well. I thank you all for your criticism. I'm only 17 and I wrote this in a matter of 1 hour, by the way. I also was not looking for a fight... :-D
Well I for one think it was admirable that someone your age is so grounded in the sense that you have a definite yearning to improve the world. And if you wrote it in an hour you did very well.
QuoteSorry if I've offended any of you. I kind of feel moronic, but that's just my paranoia... I guess.
I don't think you offended anyone, at least you did not offend me. I just saw some naivete in it, but at your age, you're doing well.
QuoteAnyways, thanks for the opinions. I agree that I do have "a lot to learn".
-Don
Hey, we all have something to learn.
Something that you may find out the hard way, is that many people have very stong opinions about things and will not be kind when their point of view seems to be challenged. Kind of like in 'real life', unfortunately, but consider it training and please don't take it personally.
Quote from: donzieja on March 23, 2011, 16:00:15
Well. I thank you all for your criticism. I'm only 17 and I wrote this in a matter of 1 hour, by the way. I also was not looking for a fight... :-D
Sorry if I've offended any of you. I kind of feel moronic, but that's just my paranoia... I guess.
Anyways, thanks for the opinions. I agree that I do have "a lot to learn".
-Don
You didn't offend, just wanted to point out there is a better way to voice your opinion in order to sway others' beliefs... alienating 90% of your reading audience isn't one of them. :wink:
This is what I meant by "a lot to learn"... that came across condescending and that wasn't my intention.
Don't be discouraged Don.
Like you said, you're young, but you're already light years beyond the typical 17 year old. You are most certainly on a path that will accelerate very quickly in the coming years. You're coupling spiritual/psychological growth and development with your biological growth and development (which as a male will have the biggest impact around your age through your early 20s). You may struggle because others expect you to fall in line with orthodoxy, but you will have an insatiable urge to explore your reality (which isn't really thought of as a noble pursuit these days). But, in the end, you'll be better off, I assure you. I went through the same thing and was probably about where you are when I was 18 or so (my senior year in high school).
Stick with it.
Okay. Thank you all for your guidance. :-D